katieeebugzz

[katieeebugzz]

1/5/22 4:52pm

new year new me <33

hey guys it’s been so long ! :00 i hope y’all had amazing holidays and a great new year !!

so much has happened to me within the past couple of months. so let me start from the beginning.

when the guy i liked led me on, i happily moved along with my life and started my second year of college. in august, my friend from high school started going to the school i do and between each other, we ended up making a small group of friends to hang out with throughout the semester. :) there is 6 of us: me, him, my girl best friend, a guy from one of my classes last semester, and 2 of his new friends (one my age and one that was a senior). we always went to get food and walk around the mall. WE EVEN WENT TO EACH OTHER’S HOUSES !! at the end of september when i was in my drawing class, my phone went off. i checked it and it was one of the guys in our group. i quickly excused myself from class and went downstairs to the bathroom. though i turned him down a couple weeks prior, i suddenly started having feelings for him the next week. “yes katelyn i still like you”.

so from that moment on we were inseparable. we went on dates, hung out with each other more, met each other’s families. our lives revolves around each other. but one day when i was at home and he left to go home after a class, he texted me saying he got in a car crash. ever since then, we slowly drifted apart it seemed like. about a month after his wreck, we got in a fight which turned into us breaking up. though the relationship wasn’t long, it was really hard for me to get better. i didn’t talk to anyone in the group but the one guy from my class last semester. after that, we became best friends. he started coming to hang out and we always made plans to get food. he was one of the reasons i got over the breakup. the day we broke up i sent him a long paragraph of what happened and a couple of days later he came over and we watched movies and ate snacks and chit chatted. it was really a nice gesture since no one else texted me/asked if everything was ok. i’m glad to say i have someone in my life that’ll have my back no matter what. with the heated argument me and my ex had, a bunch of people ended up taking his side and saying i was crazy. luckily my best friend didn’t want to pick sides and started texting me more. he’s one of the only people i have a streak with AND I DONT EVEN LIKE STREAKS !

besides all of the friend drama going on, my family has also gotten a little mad too. i really don’t want to get into the family drama, but it’s gotten to where me and my mom have no money and i’m trying to transfer schools. the school i might get into is the same college my friends from high school is trying to attend too so i’ll at least have someone with me. it’s about 5 hours from home so i’ll have to apply for scholarships so i can stay in the dorms. i’m looking forward to the opportunity that’s coming to me. :)

so far i’m penny pinching and trying to live my best life with what i have. we’ll see how it all goes !!

remember to dream big, drink water, and make sure to eat. <3

have a good day lovely,,

katie

[katieeebugzz]

☆*:.｡.get to know the blogger.｡.:*☆

1.) ☆*:.｡. i’m 19 .｡.:*☆

2.) my big 3 is ☆*:.｡. pisces sun, virgo moon, and leo rising .｡.:*☆

3.) i’m an enfp 9w1 .｡.:*☆

4.) i’m an art education major in college .｡.:*☆

5.) i’m a ☆*:.｡. zenitsu and tamaki souh kinnie .｡.:*☆

[katieeebugzz]

6/21/21 7:58pm

a note to him:

i wish the roles were switched. i wish he was in my fucking shoes. i wish i was the one crazy about someone else while you were hoping and waiting and losing sleep over being with me. i did so much for you. literally. i listened to your rants. i’ve been by your side. i’ve told u the opinions you’ve wanted to hear. did i just waste my time and thoughts on this? you literally made me feel like it would work out and then slap me with whatever the fuck you said. and now it feels like you just ripped my heart out and fed it to the wolves. i cant do this anymore. i cant stop thinking about you and that’s the problem. i cant even go a day without thinking about how sweet and kind you are. i literally told u i found your insecurities the most beautiful and it’s like you don’t even care now. i literally sat there while u told me about your restless nights and googled shit to help you sleep. was that for fucking nothing? i even told you i needed to get over you to make myself feel better and you told me you didn’t want me to. do u want me to suffer? do you not understand your feelings for me and her are going to crush us? i cant take this feeling anymore. you don’t even talk to that much anymore. its like i ruined our friendship cause i wanted to be happy. i’m fucking suffering.

[katieeebugzz]

6/20/21 12:34am

i have came to the conclusion i’m very attractive yet no one likes me

it’s been over a month since i actually posted lmao. also, HAPPY PRIDE !! ILY NO MATTER WHO YOU WANT TO BE OR WHAT TO KISS !! YOURE AMAZING NO MATTER WHAT !! <3

now, about the waffle house date, turns out he didn’t actually like me. it was just a “friend hang out” which i’m not mad about, he atleast thought about me. but the idea that i liked him for months and got turned down kinda stings. anyways, i have moved on though which is good.

though my life isn’t as busy as it used to be (i mean i am busy but you get it), shit has still been happening. one of my old friends had a graduation party at his house. so ofc i was going to go and hang out. i drive over there and we played games and went out of town to go bowling and all sorts of stuff.

i showed up at around 3-4 to say hi to everyone there like his family and some mutual friends and we left an hour or two later to go to the bowling alley. around the end, my friend who was hosting the party came up to me and asked if i wanted to bowl with him (some of the people left so 1 of the 3 lanes were open). so me and him would mess around and bowl and then we left. later that night around like 9-10 we were back at his house and you could tell he was drunk. we all were drinking, but he downed half a bottle of vodka and took 5 shots within the first 30 minutes of us being back at his house. later that night, i was talking to one of our friends and i heard him call my name from across the house. when i walked to him, he pulled me down on the couch and made me pet the dog with him. after a minute or two of silence he looks at me and tells me how much he’s liked me and how badly he wanted to date me.

the next day when he wasn’t as hungover i told him i liked him too.

a couple days of texting each other, he wanted me to hang out with him. so i drove to his house and we played games on his pc until late at night. more and more we started to talk and the more i got attached.

yesterday, i went over to his house to hang out once again, and he decided to watch a movie together. he snuggled up next to me and put his arm around me. we sat there and talked and messed with each other more than we actually watched the movie. later on while we were still snuggled up together, we ended up talking about his ex.

he’s dated his ex for 2 years but they were on and off the whole time. he texted me that they broke up 7 times within those 2 years, but they planned on possibly working it all out.

after he brought her up, i realized that even tho he had feelings for me and “wanted to date me” as he stated many times, i’d still be the runner up to his ex. this has put me back inside my little shell and i’ve been devastated ever since. yes, we both enjoyed snuggling up to each other, but i don’t want to be on the back burner when they get back together or be runner up. i want to be the only one you think about all day and night. when he told me he had sleep paralysis almost every night, i cuddled a blanket pretending it was him so i could say i helped him sleep one night. that’s what i want!

now all i’ve thought about today was how tall he was next to me. how when he fist bumped me his hand would be way bigger than mine. when i said something funny his dimples would show, and even tho he said he hated them i found them amazing. and how when he would jump only a certain amount of his hair would move cause it was fluffier in the front than the back. and how when he would lean on car, his arms would flex a little bit and you could see his muscles. and how he says he not ticklish but when u mess with his legs and feet he’ll start laughing like a little kid. and how caring he is, when is say i was a little chilly and he’d go across the room or house to grab me a certain blanket; it always being his favorite one. and how he accidentally spilled aftershave on himself and he smelled like a rich strong cologne all evening.

i’ve had these feelings for him since last year and i just noticed all the small things that make him him.

i think i’ll all blow over soon, but i really wish he went for me instead.

anyways that was my past month, have a good night and drink water pls <3

have a good nights rest,

katie

[katieeebugzz]

5/15/2021 8:49pm

i finished my first year of college and now idk what to do

hey guys its been a month. i haven’t really done much this past month so i’ll just tell yall what has been the most entertaining in the good and bad ways. 

so i’ve taken all of my finals which is good. i made an a in a class, a b and two c’s, but i did fail one of my class.. :000 i don’t know if i have to retake it because i had a class with it, which made it a two-part class (or that’s what i call it anyways) and my advisor said that “if i pass one and not the other, i still get the credit. i have no idea what’s gonna happen, but i’m kinda scared. screw math tbh.

i did my drawing 2 final and made an a though !! thank you dilf art professor for seeing how i wanted to work on new techniques and textures cause i was scared i’d do awful. i’m gonna miss his class tbh,, he was really nice. :) 

i had another art history class this semester, but i did worse than i thought in it. i made a 70 on the final, but i made a 75 in the class.. i mean Cs get degrees but yk its whatever.

my comp.2 class idk what i made on a research paper, but i made a 100 on a journal entree !! she said i did really well in the class and was glad i was with her. she said she was impressed with my artistic skills because she was never good at anything in the arts like drawing and music. “we’re very different which i really like” or something on the lines of that. she was really friendly. i’m glad i had her.

in other news from school, i woke up this morning and got a text from a guy i went to school with AND HE WANTED ME TO GET FOOD WITH HIM !!! AAKJFHKDJFSDBKJHSKDFJ!!?>:”>:>”:>”  does he know i liked him for a while cause ?? anyways hehe-- we were planning on going to ihop, but we but realized it was really busy so we went to waffle house. we walked in and he held the door open for me and paid for my food. :0000 MY EX NEVER PAID FOR ME PLS I FELT SO BAD BUT HE WAS COOL WITH IT. when we sat down we just talked and we ended up forgetting to actually look at the menu and it made one of the workers mad but yk its fine. but we ordered and all and we just sat there and talked about literally so many things. he really likes soccer he’s on a soccer team and everything, he’s never been camping, he laughed at how i was scared of frogs and snakes, we agreed that we would both rather lie about someone’s pet running away than telling them it died. A WHOLE LOT !! and i had so much fun !! :D i got back home and i texted him that i had fun and he was like “no thank you for accepting the invite to get food with me i had fun too :)” AND SFJHDFJDLFJHDFLJHDLJHFD PLS HES SO CUTE IM--

but i hope everyone has had a good day and/or night :))) drink water and eat <3

i’ll update yall again soon,

katie

[katieeebugzz]

4/6/21 9:50am

my life is either pretty good or really bad and i can’t tell which one it is:

oh crap it’s been a long time!! welp.. merry christmas, happy new year, happy valentine’s day, and every other holiday that’s goes by haha!!

this year has not been it for me, on new years i got waisted off my ass and cried about an ex, a couple months later while i was questioning my sexuality someone outed me to my mom (while it was my birthday week mind you), i hooked up with said ex i cried about on new years a couple days ago, and so far i’m overloaded with school work and i can’t do anything but eat, sleep, and do homework.

wow that was all one sentence? damn. anyways.

yeah,, i cried about an ex on new years, but in my defense he was the only ex that actually had respect for me. he came with me to my dying grandma’s house and sat in there with me, he went to my band contests, shit he couldn’t even kiss me when we were on our first date!! HE WAS SO NERVOUS HE WAITED UNTIL OUR THIRD DATE!! my most recent ex got made i wouldn’t suck him off and didn’t even get me anything for my birthday. i mean everyone has their flaws,, he’s 5’5 and voted for trump, but i’m 5’1 so he’s still taller than me and i’m not that political so i really shouldn’t be biased about people who vote who when i didn’t vote myself.

from august to now, i’ve questioned my sexuality. and i still don’t know what i like. for me to actually come up with conclusions, i ask people what they think, and thought it’s MY sexuality, people take in more than just surroundings but everyone else as well. so my thought was “i’m going to say i think i’m questioning if i like girls. cause when i say something to friends i’ll either come up to the conclusion i do or don’t and in awhile they’ll say it was a phase or an identity crisis.” i told 3 of my friends and they didn’t say anything but “whatever you decide i’ll be there for you” ...well a day or two before my birthday, my mom walks in my room and tells me someone told her what i thought and it was shameful and embarrassing of me to not tell her what i thought. from that day to the middle of march, i had an identity crisis, 4 panic attacks within a month, a speech of “how i’m not my own person”, and “whatever you’re doing is not you and you need to stop it”. so now i’m not sure if i’m questioning again because my mom said i should or if i just don’t understand who i am. so far my mom hasn’t brought it back up, and i hope she doesn’t because the idea of trying to explain my reasoning and probably get a “that’s the dumbest thing i’ve heard” doesn’t really sit well with me.

so a couple days ago me and my parents went to my grandparents for easter. me and my mom lived with my grandparents for 10 years, so i went to school there and when i moved, i ended up getting back in-contact with my old friends from school. (fun fact: the ex i cried about was one of my hometown friends.) well, i got a call from one of my hometown friends and they said him and my ex were coming over. while they were over, we all decided to go over to my ex’s house to watch a movie. around 9pm, we got back to his house and we watched the new godzilla vs kong movie (i’m not big on action movies so i wasn’t that into it but that’s just me). i was on one side, my friend was in the middle and my ex was on the other side. when it ended, my friend got up and put on the hills gave eyes (that one was good it just gave me the heebie-geebies). when it was playing i was in the same place but my ex was in the middle and my friend was on the other side. when it ended, my friend had to go home so it was just me and my ex.

(disclaimer: me and my ex have always been friends so nothing made uncomfortable. ok back to the story)

we were watching stuff on youtube and he had his arm around me, and i looked up at him cause my head was on his chest AND HE JUST WENT FOR IT !! I WAS IN MF SHELL-SHOCK LIKE !!!/&.!:& when you’re hanging out watching youtube, you wouldn’t think there’d be sexual tension BUT YK!! i don’t want to get into drastic detail cause i don’t think anyone wants to know what happened but yeah it was lowkey heated af. everyone knew we still liked each other because we only broke up due to long distance, but neither one of us believed it.

i can’t believe i went this long without updating thought, i’ll try to update more !!

if u follow this page, tysm <33

pls drink some water, eat a little, and make sure your hw is done :)

have a good day,

your tired sunshine buddy, katie

[katieeebugzz]

12/14/2020 9:10pm

diagnostics and familiar degradation

it’s been a hot minute since i’ve updated ... but nothing has been that important so let me just get into today.

for the past couple of weeks, i’ve been planning on going to my doctor for what she thinks i should do about my mental health. she proscribed me birth control last year before i got off, so she can possibly do that too right?

so me and my mom came in her office today and told her how i haven’t been eating as much as normal, not being able to wake up without wanting to go back to bed, crying for no reason, etc. and my doctor told me i have many mild symptoms of depression and i should go see a therapist. she told me about this therapist office that wasn’t too far from home so i could call in and ask to schedule an appointment. no meds but talking to someone would probably help me.

when i got home, me and my mom watched some tv and a little bit after we parted ways and went to our bedrooms and just did our thing. about an hour and a half in, i started feeling very overwhelmed and nervous so i turned off my tv and started watching tiktoks and playing genshin impact to calm my nerves; which neither helped. so i laid on my bed and started listening to music to maybe calm down whatever was going on in my brain.

later on, my mom walks in and looks at me. now me and my mom have a good relationship together, but she brought up how my LED lights could probably calm my nerves down. and in my response i said, “yeah that’s why i turned them on. i had to turn my tv off tho and lay down because i was starting to get nerved up and anxious again.” and she looked at me and said “you need to get ahold of yourself. draw or something to keep your brain busy.”

for what i didn’t tell her was i haven’t been motivated to do anything anymore, so such as drawing (which is a passion of mine) takes a lot out of me to do.

i just feel like even my mom being medicated she’s either being harder on me than she was herself or she doesn’t understand how i’m feeling. she was diagnosed with severe anxiety when she was 15, so she has to understand it’s very hard to understand once you realize “hey your anxiety is up and you’re about to have a panic attack”

idk ... it’s just taking a lot out of me to even go take a shower now.

on a better note: i haven’t had any sewer-slidal thoughts at all like i thought i would by now which is great <33

well, i’ll update y’all more on how everything is going.

goodnight everyone. drink water and sleep well,

katie

[katieeebugzz]

11/22/2020 7:51pm

semester is almost over and i might get meds >:)

i don’t update that much cause i’ve been kinda busy and i apologize, but in all honesty nothing had really happened this month. life is kinda boring. it’s starting to look a little brighter but it’s still kinda boring.

a couple days ago, i saw a tiktok of the new adventure time and princess bubblegum and marceline were doing cute gay things and i came to the conclusion i want a goth gf or bf. just the dynamic of my softish aesthetic and s/o being goth or alt would be very cute.

speaking of goths, i met this cute non-binary goth on here a couple days ago on my other tumblr page ( @stinkypetesbeefarm if you want to follow it hehe ) and they’re very very wodjskxmidjdodjd. they go by any pronouns. they’re also gay. they play the same games and watch the same animes as me. they’re just across the world....yeah </3 we’re even the same age !! life is unfair :( anyways, i got my hair cut and she called me cute....let me not fall in love with them.

i also went to a party last night....while i have an essay due and art projects i need to finish. this is why i’m so stressed i guess. i’m watching the AMAs and then i’ll go and do my work i promise lmao.

also how did doha cat get a r&b award....isn’t she a rapper...? anyways. well that’s all i can think about updating y’all with.

drink water and sleep well i’ll update y’all soon <3

your kinda gay college student, katie

[katieeebugzz]

11/9/2020 10:28pm

i haven’t updated in a while and i feel like i should

though it’s been about a week and a half, nothing much has happened. i had some friends over for halloween and found out boys are actually garbage.

i’ve done all of my school work- well...i’m almost done with my last english assignment for the week and then i have more of my late modem art work to do BUT for now i’m pretty good with what i have due.

on halloween, my friends all got together to hang out. i had some friends from college, my close highschool friends, and friends from the town i grew up in before i moved. some of my friends drank and the rest went home. one of my close friends started flirting with one of my other friends when she was drunk and ended up dropping him a couple days later. yeah i know- yikes. they’re over each other now and it’s not so weird anymore. the guy i was talking to came too! he wanted me to do his makeup so we just sat in my room for about an hour talking and doing his makeup...not many of my friends liked him that much.

speaking of the pretty boy i was talking to, i decided to not talk to him as much due to the that i think he’s been trying to play me since the beginning. we hung out at his dorm and we were messing with eachother and i said how much i weighted because i told him i never grew any taller since 8th grade i just gained a little weight and he flat out told me “that i looked like i weighted more than i said i did”

.... way to ruin the moment and make my insecurities grow huh-

and not just that but everytime i tried to hang out with him hed shoot me down and then cry over his ex and how badly his anxiety is. now i understand having bad anxiety believe me i almost had a panic attack at band practice today, but when i say my mom has about 4 panic attacks a week AT LEAST while she’s on antidepressants AND STILL FUNCTIONS NORMALLY !!!

idk if just didn’t set right with me...

so now i’m out of a pretty boy with my anxiety going up and down without antidepressants. yay :)

me and my mom scheduled me a doctors appointment because my anxiety goes up about 3-5 days out of the whole week so that’s cool.

i also think the pink hair girl i’m friends with is starting to use me too-

she always leaves her shit in my car and came to my house just to dye her hair AND STAINED UP ALMOST EVERYTHING IN MY BATHROOM !!! when we were working on her hair (i had to help she has really longed hair) we got some on the floor so i got bleach to clean it up. i got all of it off of everything and told her how the shower worked and things like that. the next day, all of her shit was everywhere and she stained up more stuff in the bathroom !!!

me and my mom both have bleached and dyed our hair and not once have we stained up the bathroom!! it’s been pissing me off but i guess accidents happen..

plus i told her i couldn’t pick her up today for practice and she literally skipped. from the dorms to the practice lot where we have band is at most a 10 minute walk. it’s not that far. i’ve walked that walk twice in one day and i was fine.

anyways i have homework i need to work on, classes tomorrow morning, and band practice in our uniforms after all of that. so i’ll write more later.

drink water and have a goodnight :)

the really tired college student, katie

[katieeebugzz]

10/28/2020 4:21pm

my brain is dead and i want to sleep:

i’m sorry i didn’t post yesterday, it was just too bland of a day to write about. all that really happened was i started my period on campus and skipped the second half of the day because i literally almost started sobbing from the pain.

anyways, today was not much better. maybe it was because my mental health has not been that good lately. literally the first thing i did today was get up and make some food so i got a microwaveable pot pie and popped it in the microwave. after i got back to my room i heard my mom call for my name, so me being the daughter i am, i bolted out of my seat and dropped my whole bowl on my lap and the floor. thankfully most of it was saved due to the bowl landing up right, but my mom really yelled at me for it and asked if the floor was cleaned. nothing about “are you ok” or “did you burn yourself” no no. she asked about the 6 year old stained up carpet on my bedroom floor. priorities am i right.

after i finished eating and got dressed, i drove to the campus to go to band practice and right as i pull into the parking lot, i get an email saying i don’t have practice. so i practically got dressed and drove 25 minutes for nothing. greeeeeeat....

so i drove back home and helped my mom with halloween decorations for about an hour and here i am. in the middle of my modern art class doing drawing homework that’s due in less than 4 hours. and since my cramping was so bad i cried myself to sleep, i accidentally slept through my drawing class and i have work due tomorrow. i have no idea what’s he wants me to do too. i’m going to lose my mind.

and speaking of due work, i have 2 english assignments i didn’t know about too that are due at midnight. also great...

so you’re going to see me not eat dinner and do ten tons of homework before midnight... i hate my life <3

i’m sorry this is shorter than normal but i really don’t have anything today so i hope everyone has a great day.

the walking panic attack, katie

[katieeebugzz]

10/26/2020 11:10pm

monday delimmas.. but when do i not have one:

i meant to write and post this at 7, but i forgot about it and now here i am. like always, today (since it was monday) i had band practice. 1:50 to 3:10...like every monday. we started learning the last third of our drill and it’s actually hot garbage. i mean i know, we just started working on it, but damn why did the director write it like that. we started doing eveything in 7s like ?? very dumb. i do have a good bit of it down, but since you know....i’m in a show band, i have to do some weird dramatic performance while getting to one of my spots. it’s very embarrassing. i never know what to do so i just casually go there and then speed run the last 10 steps. what else do i do?

not to mention i march by this guy ive been i guess talking to...i don’t even know what we are. friends? talking? i have no idea. i went to his dorm one day and we watched avatar: the last airbender and walked his dog but that was about it. i mean we did eat a whole bag of jolly ranchers so theres that haha. but like, king what are we? and another downside of the pretty boy, he’s a stoner still in love with his ex that cheated on him. i understand they were together for 4 years and i’m very willing to help him through his delimma, but what if she wants him back? am i just going to be thrown away? i mean he told me that she was one of those “he’s just my guy best friend” type of girls and they’re most likely together.. but like there’s still a pinch of possibly that she can be like “oh i miss him” like!!

also side not to pretty lanky stoner boy, he’s 20 and i went to school with his little brother...yeah.

anyways— let’s get back to some more casual things shall we.. <3

after practice me and my bisexual pink haired friend go to starbucks and then to her dorm after every practice (even though i have classes i still do them) and her anniversary with her boyfriend was coming up. he’s a very nice guy i had about 2 conversations with him and if he hurt her i’d punch him.

but turns out they were supposed to be open.. but they were closed. all. day. and i’m not one of those straight white girls that drinks coffee all the time and kisses every males ass. no no. i’m the 5’0 bisexual pink bang girl that gets strawberry lemonades because they’re too scared to ask for anything else.

so me and my friend walked another 10 minutes to get drinks and snacks and headed back to her dorm. she has an emotional support cat named otter. he’s around 6 months old and likes to get in my backpack if i leave it unzipped. he’s a very sweet hyper-active boy. i got to my online modern art class and turns out she had a meeting so i didn’t have class! yay me! i really haven’t been motivated to go to class so i’ve been putting on the zoom call and seem like i’m there and just do anything else that i feel like doing. i’ve been too drained and worn out to do much else than cry and play animal crossing. i have a weeb tiktok account that surprisingly enough gained a lot of copy though out this pandemic. so i’m proud to say, that i have a 10k+ follower account that i started right before my graduation. i love my account, but i’m taking a small break due to the fact it’s not doing as well as it was before and now i feel unmotivated to do anything.

back to my day, while me and my friend came up with ways to get everything packed because she was going out of town for the day, her roommate stopped by. her roommate is a culinary major that a little bit taller than me and went to a school not too far from my school. we made jokes about how i thought her job at papa john’s was an addiction i didn’t want to talk about and i tried to keep otter out her room.

a couple hours later, me and my friend’s roommate helped her carry her and her cat’s things downstairs to her other friend’s car and i went home.

other than that, i’ve found out i have a crush on jack from supernatural and i’ve been thinking about asking my mom if she can cut my hair.

i hope everyone drank plenty of water and gets enough rest to carry them through the day tomorrow.

the worn out art student, katie :)

[katieeebugzz]

10/26/2020 1:43am

i said goodnight earlier, but i cant sleep:

due to the lack of givi bbg a single fuck about myself or my well-being, i usually take showers around 12:30am-2:00am. i jumped in the shower as my blog was posting, dosing my body in more of steam than water and drowning my ears with jacob collier. i haven’t washed my hair in 2 days now. i promise i will tomorrow, my motivation hasn’t been around lately to do anything, i just force myself to take care of myself sometimes.

wrapping myself in a towel, more of my shower playlist bounced off the walls of the shower, i cant remember what song was playing at the moment though. to make it seem like i care about myself (and because i’d feel even more gross if i didn’t), i brushed my teeth and threw my pajama shirt on. i saw some a piece of my hair fall out into the sink and i rinsed it down. out of sight out of mine i guess. goodbye pink hair, you were supposed to be purple but the dye i bought was shitty. time to spend an extra couple of dollars and get artic fox.

i used to have a major skincare routine, but recently i haven’t devoted myself to even thinking about it. i mean if i don’t feel my best, why look it, you know? but for once this time, i put on my acne medication and crawled into bed.

my family owns many dogs. 3 we bought and 2 we were going to foster but ended up keeping. we also have 2 cats. 1 we were supposed to keep and the other was a foster we found right before hurricane harvey came. the 2 cats we keep in the wash room due to the fact they’d tear up the whole house without supervision. we keep 3 of our dogs in kennels and 2 stay in my mom’s room. thought tonight while i was working on art projects, an argument broke out and 2 of them ran into my room. when i walked back into my room after taking a shower, they were both asleep in my bed, so i just left them be. they’ll sleep better in here and maybe i will too. one that’s in my bed is a 6 year old poodle my parents bought for my mom’s birthday. buddy has climbed to me since the day we bought him. he’s not very big since he’s a miniature poodle so he’s easy to sleep with in my bed. he’s had major separation anxiety since he was a puppy so i’d feel bad just putting him in a kennel when he was sound asleep next to my pillow. the other dog sleeping in my bed is a 3 year old dachshund chihuahua mix my mom for as a surprise when i was a junior in highschool. she came to pick me up after school and when i opened the door she was in my seat. heidi is very protective but she can be very sweet. she doesn’t have an separation anxiety or worries like buddy does, but waking her up would of made me feel bad.

now since it’s 1:57am and i have classes tomorrow, i’m going to try to see if i can actually sleep.

goodnight world may the grass be greener and the flowers smell even better for everyone.

sleep well and drink water

the sleep deprived side character, katie <3

[katieeebugzz]

10/26/2020 12:55am

day idk but still pushin, the introduction:

hi. i’m katie. i’m 18, still live with my parents, and go to college for art education. you’re probably thinking, “you’re 18, why are you still with your parents?”

and i’d be glad to tell you! since i’m full of anxiety and have separation issues, i applied to a college just 30 minutes away! pretty smart right?! not that much to pay on gas- well...when you drive a blue 2009 kia soul you named terry 50% from the “put it in reverse terry” meme and 50% from a passed relative i was very close with and no extra money spent on a dorm! thought, living in one would be cool as hell...

since this shitty covid bullshit started, i have all of my mandatory classes online. yes, 2 different english classes and 2 different art classes. not to mention the gimme-class i like to call late modern and contemporary art class. i do have one elective i have in person thought, a show band that we like to call The Showcase. an incredible little 153 peice university band that takes 3 hours of my day everyone monday, wednesday, and friday. even though i’m not a music major and will never be, i seem to like where i am. sure, i swear my ass off and have to practically run across a parking lot for a show that we can’t even play at football games because they were canceled, but i made way more friends than i thought i would. i fun fact about me: i played flute since 6th grade. that adds up to 7 years that i’ve played and still kinda sound like garbage. even thought in highschool i was 6th chair out of a section of 22, i was not perfect— and i’m still not.

now here i am, 12:59am, sitting on the bathroom sink debating on wether or not i re-dye my bangs or not, typing this all out. i don’t have an inkling why i wanted to start a stupid little blog about my college life, but you know...here it is. enjoy while it lasts, because i will probably complain about every minor detail here instead of just venting to friends.

goodnight world and i’ll see you tomorrow.

the world’s dullest yellow crayon, katie