kenisle

[kenisle]

most notable times of being hit on by customers:

guy who tried to impress me with card tricks and failed every single one of them

old man who attempted to get my number when his wife walked away and slipped me his email address ending with “@ aol.com” when i said i don’t do that

cute gay couple that came back to tell me i was cute and then called the shop to ask me out

older professor who i talked to about folklore and told me he dressed as a wizard for recitals saying “this is really embarrassing but umm.. i’d love to get to know you more..” and gave me a receipt with his email address on it

dude in his 40s asking me on a movie date and me saying yes but then he kept starting text conversations with “ahoi hoi”

military guy who said it’d be hot if i killed him with a baseball bat

most notable time a customer did not ask me out:

a man who i knew had a wife and children getting really flustered and saying “um. ive been, uh.. idk if you remember me but um. i come in here a lot and ive uhhh haha umm ive been wanting to ask you for a couple weeks now.. um. have you read the green lantern issue i recommended??????”

[kenisle]

some people are afraid to be cheesy. I live my whole life on the charcuterie board

[kenisle]

"ccute baby bunny compilation" "cutest rabbit videos!" "cute bunny so sweet every video" NO. i want FUNNY rabbit. i want rabbit STUPID compilatiom. I want every video of a rabbit thumping over some inane thing . i want a compilation of ever rabbit thats ever jumped in a trash bin. show me the goddamn animal

[kenisle]

An older comic from when I used to work at Build-A-Bear

[kenisle]

Your dad looks gnc af

YOURE INSANE

[kenisle]

[kenisle]

[kenisle]

You know, "human for scale" when showing the sizes of animals living or extinct is kind of vague. We should use a specific famous person with a well-known height for scale. Like Sigourney Weaver

we must replace all "human for scale" figures in scientific literature with mr shaquille o'neal IMMEDIATELY

[kenisle]

[kenisle]

I know I couldn't handle having kids but if I was left in charge of some, I'd take them to the park to feed ducks. Not bread though, you shouldn't feed that to ducks. We're feeding them lettuce. Let the ducks going apeshit over lettuce show the kids that lettuce is actually awesome. When they go home, their parents are baffled by the fact that the kids are now willingly eating salad. In the most horribly animalistic fucked up way possible.

[kenisle]

“My dad teaching math in Southern California (late 70s/early 80s)”

[kenisle]

you ever sit with the enormity of how lucifer rising wasn’t about salmondean but actually castiel who literally changed the trajectory and the entire premise of the show and plot within the story. dean rips into him yeah but cas was always like this. he was already confining to dean he’s not a hammer on their what 3rd meeting?? . the whole of supernatural is about cas making homosexual decisions. this wasn’t supposed to happen!! we’re making it up as we go!!! is crazy to say for a few minutes of dean winchester yelling about what’s real. the angel didn’t need much nudging he was basically dropping his books purposefully clumsily and saying oops i hope theres a cute boy here to help me pick them up

[kenisle]

I'm at the doctor's office and a teenager who's like 7 fuckin feet tall just walked in and told the receptionist their name is Sequoia lmao. like is that a chosen name or did your parents somehow know you were gonna be the size of a redwood tree

[kenisle]

Pioneering a "how much craft per craft" scale that determines how much of the time you spend doing any given handcraft is actually spent on what a layperson would imagine the core of the craft is vs other associated tasks. Spinning? Mostly actual spinning. Sewing? Mostly ironing. Wood and metalworking? Mostly sanding. Weaving? I've only had a chance to do one project, but from what I can gather from my more experienced friends, it seems to be mostly math.

[kenisle]

MAY YOUR DAY BE YAOIFUL ON THIS YAOI DAY EVERYONE 🥳🎉👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨💞

[kenisle]

speechless. the pose. the expression. this should be a painting.