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Cosmere Characters React to Famous Paradoxes

As requested by @variaandroise :)

And because it just makes sense, it will be Hoid torturing everyone by confronting them with paradoxes.

1. The Liar Paradox

Hoid: Consider the statement, "This statement is false." Steris: Okay... Steris: If it's true, then it must be false.. Steris: But if it's false, then it must be true! Steris: T-That's horrible! I hate it! Steris: ... Steris: Wax! Come in here; I want to tell you something! Hoid: Now THAT'S a marriage.

2. The "Least Interesting Man in the World" Paradox

Hoid: Imagine if you lined every person up from most interesting to least interesting. Elhokar (suspiciously): Where am I in the line? Hoid: Now imagine the person at the very end of the line: the least interesting person in the world. Elhokar: Is that supposed to be me?? Hoid: That person, merely on the basis of being the least interesting person in the world, must become interesting, right? Elhokar: Kind of a backhanded compliment. I'm a king, you know! Hoid: It's - It's not you. You're not in this story. Elhokar: I'm NOWHERE in a line of EVERY person? Elhokar: Wow. Elhokar: I thought you respected me more than that. Hoid: ...Why do I even try?

3. Crocodile Paradox

Hoid: Imagine a crocodile who has stolen this man's baby, BUT he promises to return the baby if the father can guess whether the crocodile will eat it or return it. Siri: Strangely nice, for a crocodile. Vivenna: It still stole a baby! Hoid: Let's say the dad says, "You'll give my baby back." Well, the crocodile could just say, "You're wrong!" and eat the baby. Hoid: But what if the dad says, "You'll eat my baby." What will the crocodile do? Siri: Yeah, that's probably what Dad would say. Vivenna: Let's be real. He probably offered the baby to the crocodile in the first place. Siri: My husband's actually nice though. Vivenna: Maybe the crocodile is nice. Dad didn't know it, though. Siri: True, true. Hoid: ...I feel like we're getting off topic here.

4. The Burali-Forti Paradox

Shallan: What is that noise?? Hoid: Oh, I told the cryptics about the Burali-Forti Paradox. Hoid: You know, that a set of ordinal numbers would be an ordinal number smaller than itself. Shallan: The hums are deafening! Shallan: Are they pleased or screaming? Pattern: Shallan! Shallan! It turns math is the best lie of all! Hoid: Pleased, I think.

5. The Liar Paradox (again)

Hoid: Consider the statement, "This statement is false." Yumi: Oooh, yeah. That doesn't work at all, does it? Hoid: Does it bother your brain? Yumi: Not really. Hoid: Really? It does for most people. Yumi: Consider my life. Hoid: ... Hoid: Okay. Fair.

6. The Crab & the Arrow

Hoid: If you fire an arrow at a tort--I mean, at a crab, the arrow has to get halfway to the target before it reaches it, right? Kaladin (suspiciously): Yes? Hoid: And then it has to reach the halfway point of the distance that remains, right? Kaladin (more suspiciously): Yes? Hoid: And then it has to reach the halfway point of the distance that remains again! And again! And again! Every time the distance halves, it has to reach the halfway point again! Hoid: So logically, the arrow will never reach the crab. Kaladin: Well, of course not. Hoid: Really? Kaladin: You've been talking so long that the crab has definitely scuttled away by now. Kaladin: Crabs aren't idiots, you know.

7. Penrose Stairs (link to picture)

Hoid: Look at these impossible stairs! Lightsong: Yes, yes. Artistic representation of the futility of life. We've all seen it. Llarimar: [Dutifully writing this down]

8. God paradox

Hoid: Can God create a boulder too heavy for him to lift? Harmony: Yeah. Harmony: It's actually easier than you might think to create a situation that you, a god, can't deal with. Harmony: Being a god is actually really hard! Hoid: ... Hoid: Maybe this would work better in a place where gods are omnipotent.

9. Sorites Paradox

Hoid: Imagine you have a heap of sand. Kenton: Super easy. I am crushing this. Hoid: Now imagine you take one grain of sand from the heap. Kenton: You're not even challenging me here. Hoid: It's still a heap of sand, right? Kenton: Yes, of course. Hoid: Well, imagine you keep taking single grains of sand away. Eventually--all the sand will be gone. No more heap. So at some moment, a single grain being removed changed it from a heap to not-a-heap. But when? Kenton: Never. As long as it BELIEVES it is a heap and WANTS it badly enough, it will always be a heap! Hoid: ...What about when all the sand is gone? Kenton: Who cares if there's no sand? I say, it is still a heap! Hoid: Is there someone else I can talk to?

10. Barber Paradox

Hoid: Imagine a barber who declares that he will shave only and all men who do not shave themselves. The question is: Does he shave himself? Kelsier: No. Hoid: Well, then he must be a man who doesn't shave himself, which means the barber must shave him! But once he does, then he's a man who shaves himself, so he can't! Hoid: Paradox! Kelsier [arms folded]: When does he become a man who doesn't shave himself? Hoid: What? Kelsier: Sure, once he shaves himself, then he's a man who shaves himself. But if he doesn't, he still might be a man who is going to shave himself at some point, but he hasn't. Kelsier: I don't see why he can't exist in that quantum state forever, neither shaving himself nor definitively becoming a man who doesn't, hence delaying the paradox. Forever. Hoid: ...You would say that. Kelsier: Bite me.

[kieran-0]

So I just did the official knights radiant quiz and...

Turns out i'm a windrunner🎉

Personally thought i'd be a willshaper or edgedancer, but apparantly i wasn't entirely wrong

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There he is, theres my favorit boy

elio's script is wild cause wdym blade has to become a pokémon master

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Yunli and her uncle(s) <3

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High cloud quintet relationship headcanons

Baiheng

Dan feng: a good friend, a bit closed off but they got along despite her constant teasing him.

Jingliu: baiheng quiet enjoyed her company, thay were drinking budys and would often go drinking with out the others.

Jing yuan: part of her still thought of him as a kid, (i don't have a lot to say about there relationship from her perspektiv) they got along well enough.

Yingxing: she was quiet fond yingxing ever sense there first meeting, she was incredibly supportive of his work and dreams.

Dan feng

Baiheng: dan fang got along quiet well baiheng despite her constant teasing, when she died he was devastated and blamed himself for her death.

Jingliu: he respected jingliu and looked up to her as a leader, the two would often spar and jingliu would always win even with the help of yingxing.

Jing yuan: the two would often play strategi games agenst one another, with jing yuan often being the winer, they were quiet close.

Yingxing: yingxing was dan fang's closest friend and confedont, dan fang world often went his frustrations to him.

Jingliu

Baiheng: baiheng was her closest friend, they would often drink and laugh together, baiheng's death effected her greatly and jingliu's memories of her would eventually propel her into mara.

Dan feng: jingliu held great respect for him, despite constantly wining in there sparring matches she belived the if he was to use his cloud hymn magic he could probably have won half of them.

Jing yuan: jingliu loved jing yuan like a son but would never be caught dead emitting to it (she acctidenttly told baiheng about it when drunk, but nether of them remember it) the day he bacame general of the luofu was the proudest day of her life.

Yingxing: jingliu also saw him as son (jing yuan was the favorit tho) she found his head strong nature and arrogant bravado indering, she also admierd his craftsmanship and the sword he made for her was one of her most prized possession.

Jing yuan

Baiheng: jing yuan looked up baiheng when he was younger and her carefree spirit definitely rubed of on him. Out of all the members of the high cloud quintet, he was the least effected by her death but it was still devastating for him.

Dan feng: dan fang was a good friend to him, the two would often play chess and other games, jing yuan held great respect for him as well.

Jingliu: he held an immeasurable amount of respect for his master, she practically raised him and taught him everything he knows about combat, when she became mara struck in the aftermath of the sedition of imbibitor lunae it effected him more then baiheng's death had done priviously.

Yingxing: despite there constant bickering the two were actually quiet close, they were of a simulera age to one another and would grow to become like brothers, to this day the starfall reverie is one jing yuan's most treasured possessions.

Yingxing

Baiheng: baiheng was the one who inspirerad yingxing to be self confident in his work, he eventually grow to have a crush on her but he never confessed his feelings out of fear of ruening thier friendship (he made the flagon with the intentions of confessing, but never did) yingxing was the most effected by baiheng's death out of all of them.

Dan feng: dan fang was yingxing's clonest friend and the only person he would voice his selfdoubt to (including his feelings for baiheng) when dan feng came to him with his plan resurrect baiheng it didn't take much convinsing to get yingxing to help him.

Jingliu: was like a stern mother figure to him, he respected her greatly and the sword he made her was his magnom opis, he would regularly spar with her (and dan fang) but was never really a warrior (until he bacame blade of course)

Jing yuan: when they first meet yingxing thought he was loud and obnoxious they would constantly be butting heads with one another, but over time they would become close and their constant bickering would turne into playful banter.

[kieran-0]

So just me or do these two look...similar?

Capitano and signora's husband...look so similar...

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This makes me happy

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LONG LIVE THE KING

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Lil rant incoming - Let's remember that when men are good with kids or good with cooking, it is NOT "wife" or otherwise female-coded behavior. Look, I get that a lot of society has experienced bad examples of fatherhood, but fathers and husbands are SUPPOSED to be protective and loving, just like Mydei shows. Yes, he's a bit awkward about it, which is perfectly realistic, but his heart is all there, and that's so masculine of him. You all want less of toxic masculinity, so when a man behaves like a green flag, let's normalize calling him a perfect husband or a perfect father, and not misgender/stereotype. Mydei's father was the example of toxic/abusive fathers. His mother inspired him to love and sacrifice. By giving honor to her, he isn't becoming more "female", he's breaking the mold his father gave him, and becoming the true king everyone deserves.

[kieran-0]

3.1 banners

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[kieran-0]

But i like the Dr. Gil jokes :(

Enough for Gil-Ilya jokes, how about Gilgamesh-Hakuno = Mydei-Stelle dynamic wkwk. Make love not trauma~

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「... It must be the mask」

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Just got Welt of standard banner

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My C1R1 Neuvillette

this is the only limited 5 star constellation and/or weapon i plan on having

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Rexy-boy is home!

[kieran-0]

roleswap bailu and danheng au

Bailu never thought she would be on the Luofu again. There's a small part of her that wants to weep at the homecoming. 

So this is the Luofu. The ship she has only seen in the echo of her dreams.

She's not... bitter. Okay, she's a little bitter. After all, she isn't Baiheng. She shouldn't be held accountable by the actions of her predecessor. Bailu has already spent a stint in the Shackling Prison, sentence to exile and has never seen her homeship truly, until today. She bore all of this with far more grace than it deserves in her opinion.

She is Bailu, Nameless medic of the Astral Express. 

She is Bailu, disgraced Vidyadhara. The reincarnation of the Volantem Lunam, the High Elder of the Vidyadhara Baiheng.