kinsy

[kinsy]

Let’s play hangman. Did anyone bring a noose?

[kinsy]

Did it hurt... when you hauled your sturdy foundation up from hell?

[kinsy]

...knight in flashing armor...

[kinsy]

It’s scary to think people like us can go on a road trip. I could wake up tomorrow and go on a road trip, and I just don’t think society deserves to deal with that.

[kinsy]

Really though - what is a snowman without... snow balls?

[kinsy]

My grandma keeps talking about a dementia seminar she went to, but I feel like a dementia seminar is not really something you remember...

[kinsy]

My friend is blind, but on the plus side, every guy is a ten for her.

[kinsy]

Do you think the city governor pees on the fire hydrants?

[kinsy]

I’m like a diet. I’m annoying, skinny, and women like me for some reason.

[kinsy]

Eat the bloodstained twinkies.

[kinsy]

There’s four things you can be in life: sober, tipsy, drunk, or hungover. Tipsy is the best because it’s the only one where you’re not crying the whole time.

[kinsy]

If I got to ask anyone a question about history, I’d ask Abe Lincoln: how was the show? really ended with a bang, didn’t it?

[kinsy]

allstate man is where it’s at.

[kinsy]

Kill all the birds with one stone.

[kinsy]

If they made a movie about Morgan Freeman, who would narrate it?

[kinsy]

I only curse at inanimate objects. I don’t curse at animate objects because there’s a chance they might curse back.

[kinsy]

It is true that you can catch flies with honey, but you can catch more honeys by looking fly.