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The Batman (2022) dir. Matt Reeves

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G A P

I have forgotten that I had a Tumblr. It's one of those "you use and forget" situations especially when there are so many new social media apps coming out it's crazy..

Got an email about my account and took action immediately (already had multiple instances of hacking across different social media apps) and couldn't help revisit the old side of me. Let me say that my high school phase of my life was definitely something LMAO

I checked old messages and man was I such an imbecile. I saw a futile effort to talk to my ex in my inbox (wow what the fk past me actually cringe). I could not help myself by sussing out my ex's Tumblr, perhaps I was wondering if she had stopped using this platform entirely.. ahh who knows right? Damn was I wrong, she still uses the platform! Am I shocked? Yes! After all I've ditched Tumblr out of my life until tonight.

Sorry for being a creep but I read some of her posts, they made me smile. I love that she's going through different phases of her life and I'm REALLY happy that she still documents her life. It made me realise how much I've missed seeing this person and how much we both grew as individuals.. couldn't be any more proud of her.

I suddenly had one of those "life flashing before my eyes" moments but with the memories of us when we were once young. I still remember, and will never forget, how we both met and how it went down.. (it's a part of my life I will never forget). Her existence has made my journey and stay in Australia memorable. She inspired me, she loved me and she cared for me.. that's something I took for granted as the years passed.

Honestly I'd like the chance for us to hang and kick back as adults. That would be nice :)

About this platform.. I have decided to do the same as she does, document my life until the very end.. an autobiography if you will.

Low-key I've always thought my life story is something that I'd like to write about, after all I did have a passion for writing (I even had a phase of making up songs).

-- if you get to read this.. I am happy that you're doing well and just want to say that you're doing just fine :)

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RHADS  -  https://www.facebook.com/artbyrhads  -  https://instagram.com/rhads001  -  https://vk.com/rhads_club  -  https://society6.com/rhads/prints  -  https://www.artstation.com/artist/rhads  -  https://soundcloud.com/artem-rhads-cheboha/tracks  -  https://www.behance.net/rhads  -  https://www.facebook.com/therhads

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Life smart

It's about time to say goodbye to 2017 and embrace another year of life ahead of us. We've been through tough times, ups and lows of relationships, but to only grow everyday.

Lately the most recent thing happened to me was being in the friendzone by someone I like, I guess that's my fault as well because I got my own flaws, it's tough and yet feels very familiar like it's de ja vu. I would say it's in the realms of the same emotional equivalent of being cheated on and such. The past couple of months was fun but it was also hard to move on.. it's hard since we have the same group of friends SO it's like hard to move on (feeling wise). Tonight she wanted to talk and I'm not really into it but I just gave and talked then she mentioned about some guy she hooked up with and deep in me I'm hurt but at the same time I shouldn't be?? Hello me!? That's not even right... Anyway at the end of the call I slowly develop a mixture of emotions that ranges from caring to angry and "I'm over it" so that's why I'm writing this because she told me why I'm not her type and she mentioned how I'm not "smart" maybe I'm not the brightest but she did say "see you're more life smart or street smart" (I guess that's kinda a low blow to my intellectual side of things). I may sound immature but I think the only way for me to get over her is 1.) Find someone new 2.) Work on myself development once again 3.) Focus on my career as an artist and a game dev. On the side note I've been working in a factory for a month or so now and it feels really good to earn money which not only that it feels good that I'm working after several years of being lazy. It's not the work I want to be in but for the meantime it will do me just as fine.

I've realised something, not just while working, after the girl zoned me it made me think who I was as a person (currently) and what are my habits.. then it clicked to me that I want to be focused on my life because no one will love my life other than me. Here on in I'm making some mental preparations and some mental "new years resolution". I've told myself I will quit gaming this year (which I have done last semester), go gym as a replacement for gaming, actually focus on my art and grind the shit out of my time to get really.. I mean REALLY good cause f**k Ive been aiming so high but not really going anywhere, and lastly relationships or looking for a relationship is under my priorities (if I like someone and it develops into something more than why not).

I guess that's it for now... I'm trying to keep a low profile when it comes to my private life which I always have a habit of sharing to the entire universe my private life. Hopefully next time I write something here it will be something significant (milestone in my life maybe). Until then I shall continue exploring this bizarre planet called Earth.

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“And make the devil pray…" 

based on bathub scene in  Youjo Senki manga: Chapter 11 page41-42

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Latest photo study I did a couple of days ago with a photo reference. I still struggle painting feathers/fur/hair but that's just the tip of the iceberg of the things I struggle with when it comes to drawing/Painting. I tend to get lazy as usual because video games but at the back of my head I still want to get good and improve.. it's just daunting at times (self expectations). Original photo is over on my artstation: https://www.artstation.com/p/8a8VG

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JUST LIKE “LET’S PLAYS” WITH GAMING THERE SHOULD BE A THING CALLED “LET’S PAINTS” WHERE ARTISTS DO COMMENTARIES ON THEIR ART AND DO SILLY SHIT.

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JUST LIKE “LET’S PLAYS” WITH GAMING THERE SHOULD BE A THING CALLED “LET’S PAINTS” WHERE ARTISTS DO COMMENTARIES ON THEIR ART AND DO SILLY SHIT.

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Is it my year?

According to Chinese Astrology, this year is my year to shine, but do I actually feel like its my year? Perhaps so

I’ve been doing more art and less games, trying to get back into badminton, working out more and so on. I have a couple of goals in mind for this year and one of them is to get a job because I’ve been trying countless of times and to no avail.. sigh. Another is to actually really focus on uni, the past two sems of last year I was barely passing, so more time management. Lastly I will try to get myself a mentor or even myself a spot for an internship when I’m about to graduate.. I’m not gonna go anywhere in this industry if I just don’t do anything. I actually feel like this year will be a good one and I don’t always say that (i actually dont LOL). 

Oh I think I may have a potential love life again LOL after what... 5 or 6 years? yeah HAHA.. well I’ll be meeting this girl on the 18th for lunch. I hope all goes well and this could develop after all we’re just “testing the waters”

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Daniel Kamarudin

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My photo study of some random images of birds I found on the internet over the course of two days. I'm currently making another and I might actually do a bird series if this continues

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New year, New me???

Its 2017 already and I didn't even realised how much time passes by like it's nothing. I just had this weird and deep thought about my future and maybe in 3 years time or so I'd be married or whatever.. but that's just my mind wandering ahead of time. I've talked about quitting games on my last post, especially Dota 2, and so far I'm actually doing it! You want to know why? Well during Christmas (2016) I got gift cards for jb-hi-fi.. well I said to myself that I can get overwatch since it's on sale as well. I did get overwatch and I do like the game but playing it made me play less Dota and games in general. I know it's a bit cliche, a game helped me play less games, but hear me out... A game of Dota takes like 30mins to an hour or so long and compared to Overwatch where a single game can take 15mins to 25mins which is good since I can just call it quits after one game. On a other note, my friends that are artists, invited me to their Skype draw sessions (well we used Google hangouts instead) to motivate ourselves to draw.. let's be honest we do feel lazy. Ever since I've done this hangout draw sesh I've been mostly drawing/painting and it's actually good. I will only draw if and only if I'm getting paid for it (commissions) but this way it forces me to draw. Even if we dont hangout and draw at some nights, I try to get some of my other friends that draw and do a hangout draw session with them. There's was one time where the other group I did this with suggested actually making a group and just live stream it while drawing, not gonna lie I've been dreaming of streaming art even games as well for some time now... But if this ever happens I'm 10000% aboard. I've been doing paintings the past to days and its amazing to post some content on my Facebook page and my artstation after not painting anything at all. I'm thinking of doing a painting a day or something like that.. I know it seems impossible at times with uni coming up soon but I'll try my best. I will post my recent painting study I've done the last two days.