kubamo

[kubamo]

🆂🆃🅰🆁🆅🅰🆃🅸🅾🅽 ⚰

From the heart of unimaginable suffering, I want to sincerely thank everyone who has supported my family 🙏🏻

Right now, famine is hitting us harder than ever, my heart cries whenever I go to the market to buy any basic necessities! The prices are crazy, and most days my children survive on just bread Hunger and thirst are destroying us, and cooking on fire increases our suffering unbearably! Severe eye and chest sensitivity, in addition to constant stomach pain due to the type of food and the way it is cooked.

All this while we flee from one place to another in fear of bombing, bullets, and imminent danger! I cannot describe what I feel, but it is a feeling beyond exhaustion!

Despite the exhaustion, your support gives us strength and I hope you will not let us down

If you can donate, please do so, or at least help us by sharing, so we can reach those who can

Your kindness truly keeps us going

>> Our campaign is vetted by gazavetters list at Momen & his family

Gaza is full of oppression #The worst is yet to come #Genocide #A resilient people

[kubamo]

god exams are kicking my ass and I want to die and also everything is falling apart and nothing matters and all my dreams are crumbling. But. In 30 years I might get a large-bosomed damsel to attend modest fast-food chains with. So I will not be hanging myself. today. goodnight.

[kubamo]

Let's cuddle lovingly with mama

[kubamo]

Every weekend I drink a glass of milk before napping only to re-realise my mistake as I wake up with 400ml of spoiled milk sloshing around in my lactose-intolerant guts with the spoiled milk fumes wafting up my oesophagus istg

[kubamo]

Had a discussion with my brother, a right winger, wherein we discussed Asmongold living in his own filth. but we ended the discussion with agreement when I brought up that if a woman lived like that she would be wife-material fr

[kubamo]

Why the Tau are the best faction

I keep hearing this stupid take that "urm Tau are good guys in warhammer but they'd be evil in any other" like no my dude, we fight for the greater good, together, no mind control or pheromones that was debunked, a weird religious thing that's even less dystopian than real-world religions, bug people and bird people under the same flag, I'd fight and die for my hooved siblings just as they'd die for me dammit. The Tau are more moral than most sci-fi or real world governments and tbh they're what all good utopian fiction should be, inspiration. All the non-canon books about them being genocidal or whatever is stupid trying to bog down a hopeful vision of a better world.

[kubamo]

losing it

[kubamo]

NO FUCKING WAY THIS IS A MOVIE ISTG

[kubamo]

Pigeon-Shit Farm. pt 2

My last post was more just context for where I live We have this 'hot tub' it's just a big bathtub in the woods that you can light a fire underneath to heat up. Anyways me and my brother are loudly arguing about some shit in the middle of the night, I love him no disrespect, and then this fucking movement and this fucking thing that is like. A deer with broken antlers, or like a goat, idk its eyes were so bulgy, and it just pops its head up out of the trees and fucking sits there, then we both yell in terror I crawl out of the 'hot tub' in my swimming shorts (which go down to my calves for some reason, they're huge, more like swimming longs if anything) anyway the thing retracts its head back under the tree and my brother starts splashing water in its direction, we can hear the rustling of branches implying its continuous existence. My brother is like "fuck did, do you see that?" and I say like "fuck yeah I saw fucking that" or something of the like then he says "you're pathetic and weak come out and fight me right now" which is apparently how he deals with demons and ghosts... I've noticed that nearly all of the 'things' I 'see' in these woods look like weird morphs of humans, like "the animal" which looks like a bloated pale human with a head that dangles on a flaccid neck, "the gardener" which is a tall humanoid with coal-coloured skin whose head extends to above the brush when my brother describes creatures he sees here they're often animal-based for example he once saw what he said was either a demon, or a deer wiping its arse on the road outside our house, it had a full head of horns and it looked him in the eye when he looked at it out of the window causing him fear, he also claims he once saw some kind of weird pure-white quadruped jump from one side of the forest, over the road, to the other side. Of course this time we both just saw some weird animal, it's still cool though I wonder what it means that I hallucinate mostly human looking things, whereas my brother hallucinates animal-creatures. We talked about it and he said his biggest fear is humans with animal-heads. Pretty cool. Things've been pretty chill on Pigeon-Shit, although wasps are beginning to make a hive in my bedroom, I've learned that wasps are chewing open the ceiling and are now able to crawl around above the ceiling and below the roof, at least it means my fear of a human in that space is delayed. Would you guys rather wasps live above your ceiling and below your roof, or a person.

[kubamo]

Everything wrong with my local library

-There is a marriage here between 1nce a week and 3rice a week (no they don't rent out the libary, they just have the ceremony while everyone is chilling) -an orchestra plays in the libary, with an audience, sometimes they leave the door open, it is very loud -the electrical grid is both old and furious and will fry any device plugged into the many sockets -the heating is on at all times always even in summer -there is a lego room, this is just cool -there's a FNAF section lmfao -there's an entire room entirely dedicated to the history of wells -there's a wall in the FNAF section dedicated to the unsolved murder of a man who was killed, by a bullet, which was fired at him... from a slingshot... -Sometimes you see a kid with a tuba walking into the FNAF section and you think "thank god, it's just a practice lesson, but no.. big band orchestra -The Library has a clocktower on top of it which GONGS loudly every hour. -I'm pretty sure its the oldest building in my town besides a castle which is famous for being the shittest castle in the world -the libary is filled with corridors which go god-knows-where, just going to the toilet takes you: down a stairway, across the whole building, up a stairway, through a corridor, into another stairwell, through another corridor, then it's to the only toilet in the entire building which for some reason is placed in the corner of the largest single-toilet room I've ever been inside. -they let you eat in here, sometimes people have a whole damn Mcdonalds buffet. My town does not have a Mcdonalds. ngl this is awesome -it's genuinely miles of corridors in this place, some rooms have windows which just lead to. other stairwells I've not explored before. It feels like being a naked mole rat in tunnels. -The orchestra are playing that one song by Frank Sinatra or something right now the one that's like AND NOOOOOOOOOW THE END IS NEEAAAAR -I turned to the girl next to me like "haha, you'd think the library would be quiet, at least no one's getting married today." and she pointed down the hall to where, indeed, someone was getting married. I love my local library, it's so nice and so important, I think I was born here, beautiful building.

[kubamo]

Thinking about the inherent love of CPR

I will hurt you, though I hate to, I will break your ribs and force your body to keep you in my life a little longer

[kubamo]

No I don't care if its free I will NOT play Marvel Rivals

[kubamo]

more on my gods, I have no disrespect for christians lol, this worldview is kind of just my own insanity

The 7th God, it's a He, his favourite number is 7.

He (neopronoun He/Him capitalised always) is the god of human sacrifice.

He is the great devourer. Teeth with teeth with teeth, gnashing and mawing.

All gods have their own exclusive afterlife, all of them, align your soul with a god and you will go there.

An afterlife is just a god's digestive system, no less apparent than in His.

His is a stomach, a Hell, eternal pain, the only thing a god, being so vast, never feels, the Blue Sea of sensations, the nutrition not exploited This God is a pioneer-species of spiritual organism. Pain gods are so difficult to gain followers for, after-all, sometimes you just gotta do it yourself. Pain that He himself creates, to feed upon.

Heaven is closeness with God? It's his stomach. It's never described in the literature. God keeps you in heaven to devour you, keeps you in hell to torture you. What loving God would send people to Hell? You love your food don't you?

YHWH used to be a war god, you know. A war god, of law, thunder, patriarchy. You know Paerun? No? Does Zeus ring a bell? Does Jupiter ring a bell? Well what about Djeus-Pitr? Djeus-Pitr is the creature that birthed these other deities, incarnations, Jupiter gave us Rome, the Romans. Who came to England, unable to understand that the British didn't own their women, stated that the tribe owned the women collectively. The Romans, who "made a wasteland and called it peace." Of course the Romans, followers of Djeus-Pitr, were the ones to kill Jesus. Didn't God allow His son to be sacrificed, didn't God kill Jesus with soldiers that followed an incarnation of Him?

God, who told Abraham to kill his own son, and Abraham obeyed without question. Who told His followers that a slave should be a good slave. Who told His followers, the Israelites, to sacrifice the Canaanite girls to him, the livestock, and the wealth. What does a loving God, an all-powerful God, need with sacrifices? And why is the death of the Son of God so important? Aren't we all sons and children of God? It's a sacrifice, it's all sacrifice. Capitalism exists in God's world, unstifled, because whatever Demiurge is most powerful right now, it's a hungry one. The way of slavery, of imperium, gave way to Right of Kings, gave way to Capitalism, all things that create slavery. And what is slavery if not a person's personhood revoked, given away, to what? To feed the spiritual machine, your soul sucked away, fed to a greater being. Is it a Halo? Or is it just a lamprey's mouth of teeth, glistening in the light, poised, eager, over the head of the most ready sacrifices.

[kubamo]

These are the 7 gods I have been imagining since I went insane in lockdown, I only recently began piecing them together properly.

Bottom-green-circle with horn: This is Djelbah, they are the god of vermin, their belief is that all life is equally valuable. Think of them as a fertility god, invoking them you will give birth to quadruplets, your grain will grow, your cows will fatten, the rats in your pantry will eat well and your chance of getting tapeworms increases by like 50%.

When I stat a creature I label their closeness to Djelbah as "flesh"

Bottom-Right- straight line that detours- blue: This is Wadgzohk, the labyrinth, god of delusion. Their belief is that there's a secret truth to everything. Think of them as a knowledge god, every time you randomly have a realisation, that's Wadzhokh, I spell their name differently every time because I think that it would find that funny. It gives you secret knowledge, it wants you to determine what knowledge is true and what is false. Think of Plato's cave, Wazdgohk thinks that everything is a Plato's cave. Invoke them and you will either devolve into conspiratorial nonsense or you will be overwhelmed with the reality of the world that nobody else seems to understand.

When I stat a creature I label their closeness with Wagdokh as "Labyrinth"

The Top-Right- orange- H symbol represents Mantoleen: Mantoleen is the oathkeeper, the record-keeper, the observer of all things pure, honest, old, and loyal. They are the wise grim reaper, they live in a house made of dust, they are a god of fire. They take note of all your pacts, break an oath, Mantoleen will forgive you with effort, invoke Mantoleen and Mantoleen will make damn sure that pact is kept or that the breaking party is punished. Mantoleen also rewards record-keeping, historians and such. The oldest pact, to respect your elders.

When I stat a creature with Mantoleen I label it as "pure"

The top symbol- purple- a triangle in a square in a circle: This is Oneka, god of beauty and purity and perfection. They are the observer of beautiful things, they are the maker of beauty. Their rune is for honour, maintenance, stagnation, those who are ugly, perhaps an arbitrary metric, are unworthy of Oneka's gaze. It's unknown how beauty is decided by Oneka, and perhaps the decision is subjective. Those close to Oneka are those obsessed with beauty, be they feverishly desiring to be beautiful, or those with a good eye for beauty.

When I stat a creature with Oneka I label the stat as "honour"

Top-left, red, trident whose long limb makes two turns in the same direction- this is Kh'ck, named supposedly after the satisfying sound of a job-well-done. A broken limb? A popped fruit? Who knows! All the universes in the world might contain the answer. Kh'ck is the god of competition, of war, of chivalry. Kh'ck believes that somewhere is a leaderboard containing the names of every single being ranked top to bottom in terms of prowess. Kh'ck serves to test each individual, to test their mettle and view what stuff they're made of, enduring to discover what person or thing is at the top of the leaderboard so that hopefully it will be stronger than Kh'ck (who believes they are at the top) and Kh'ck will be killed by them. Kh'ck can be invoked in order to create motion, in more magically inclined worlds (like the one in my book) these runes are kinetic, but in most instances the runes are more limited but can create motion in the form of opportunity, disaster, spurring you into change, the opportunity for growth or destruction. Kh'ck works with you, against you, Kh'ck will throw you to the dogs just to see if you lead them. Invoking Wadzgohk may lead you deeper or out of the forest, invoking Oneka may make you see faults that nobody else does or may make you more beautiful, Kh'ck also can be invoked to give you the chance for great reward as well as great risk.

The word I use when statting creatures for Kh'ck is "competition"

The bottom-left god, a four-armed spiral, orange or brown, Chaelid: This is the god of primality, Chaelid represents honesty in its purest form. Chaelid is all about unleashing what is secretly there, Chaelid wants you, no not the fake you, the facade, the shell, the real you deep in that abyss. Maybe the abyss, the difference between shell and truth, only was born with Chaelid's influence, or mayhaps Chaelid knows you better. Chaelid is a truth god, their spiral rune has the additional ability to break curses and blessings. They will dangle your heart's desire in front of you if you will damn well take it. Chaelid would tell Freud to fuck his mum and chop off his dad's dick.

I use the word "primal" for Chaelid

This post is kind of an explanation for my previous post lol. Also because I have noone to talk about my gods.

[kubamo]

Life on Pigeon-Shit farm

I live on a farm, name is two words first a synonym of pigeon, second a synonym of shit - as in, "you're shitting me." Or I guess "you're kidding me" would be more understandable but that's not as funny.

We moved to pigeon-shit farm a couple years back, nearly half my life ago, the husband of the owner had just died, we bought the 11 acres for cheap-as-chips - now it's about 22 acres, all trees, all pigeons, all shit. When describing it I tell people "I live in the woods." Or, "I live on the hill where the Pendle Witches were killed, 1.5 hrs from the nearest shop, in the woods, in an illegal warehouse-type place where the previous owner's husband died." But that's all made up.

The pendle witches died someplace away from my hill, probably, I don't really know, and also it isn't really a forest, its a plantation, trees ordered in neat rows, sectioned off into squares that go up and up and up in rows and rows, you could walk through the whole thing and not meet any animal larger than the cats which mysteriously appear in those woods or my mother's peacocks which mysteriously disappear. Of course you'd emerge covered in ticks, as I have, as our new cats have. Point is, it isn't nature. We bought some pigs, nasty things, and me and my dad built the pen around them; we dug a trench, about 40cm deep, 20/25 metres long, not a single worm in the whole of the soil. In America, I presume that's a signifier of healthy soil, but in England? Frankly the nature here is baffling.

My brother's dad lived in town, couple miles South of our hill, over a bridge, over a river, bunch of countryside. Anyway, he sees someone walking in our yard, something that happens a lot lately, and he walks down quick, it's our normal routine. Me and him seem to sleep late, so we hear the ruckus in our yard, we go down, wave a torch around, tell our parents to go out and catch the bandits. Thing is, he goes down, looks out the window, its a deer, a buck, antler pointing up and around, looking right into the window. Scared the shit out of him. Then, months later, he moves out to live in his dad's tiny apartment, he tells me the story of him gaming and drinking, chilling at night, then he goes downstairs, a tapping on the window, what does he see in the middle of town? a buck, in the road, kilometre away from woodland, if you consider woodland to be a teeny little park reserved for old people to picnic in.

Whatever is at play on Pigeon-Shit farm is basically the opposite of, like, the mutations in Fallout. Everything here is mystically dull, even my mum's peacocks appear to have some kind of grey or brown undertone to their feathers I swear. But they, rather than becoming mindless and wild, have some sort of silent cryptic pride about them like a silent observation. One of my mum's peacocks, Basil, who my dad later beheaded, was ran over by my dad's bike and must have become partially blind keeping both eyes shut to the point I worried he lost the ability to open them. But he would follow you like a shadow, some people he would attack but the choice seemed random, me and my mum he would just walk behind us in silent (lack of) observation.

We have Alpacas too, four of them, Diego is Die-gone though. They do this weird thing where they just sit there in their enclosure, watching, with their head slowing shifting from side to side like a pool-noodle with a rock on the end shifting in a very weak wind. It's super creepy. Although, to be fair, it's not exactly unusual, if anything I'm the one going stir crazy. Animals can be freaky, I have this saying that any group and any one frequently thought of as stupid or mindless is far more closely intelligent to the rest of us than we think. Even bees play and even snails can get depression. So I guess it makes sense that someone who hadn't experienced much of animals would, upon living in close proximity to them, be shocked by the strange intelligence they all possess.

And that goes for all of us really. Pigeon-Shit farm has a way of driving us crazy, I have a few theories. The local area's strange natural occurences, the lack of worms, the foam that forms on every running water including the enormous river near my home, the dead trees that sit lifeless, not rotting, not breaking, just gradually eroded by the wind till they have no bark. Perhaps there's some kind of weird chemical here that causes hallucinations and the pollution, it would make sense, we're always digging up old batteries, pots and pans, entire mattresses that had been dumped in the earth. We're basically living on a trash pile. My other theory is mould, black mould, I heard mould spores can cause things like headaches and hallucinations and our house basically has a massive crawlspace above the ceiling but beneath the roof, as well as between some walls. Now, mould forms in places like our bathroom all the time and we just paint over it, but perhaps some massive growth of mould exists, unseen, in those massive chambers in our house, the empty spaces unused by rooms on the house's blueprint, birthing litres of spores that then we breathe in.

The mould theory is my most logical theory, regarding the supernatural occurences on Pigeon-Shit, thing is it isn't just me. Near everyone in my family says there's some weird stuff in these "woods" except nobody seems to think much of it. Hell. My grandfather lived here alone once, keeping the house safe when we went vacationing in Cornwall. I never noticed it, but he never comes here anymore, my mother says it's because he claims there are witches here, when he was alone, and one of the tables outdoors got flipped over, my mum says he did it, of course, but why would he? and he still avoids our house.

Weeks into living here, my dad began saying things, every day for weeks, at exactly 6PM, a knock would sound on the door, every day, until it became ignored, apparently my mum's friend came over once, met a fellow at the door at 6PM, told him he was lost and to go down the road. The knocking stopped. My dad began envisioning a woman in a white dress, ethereal, at the foot of his bed.

My brother says he saw things here too, says he'd get headaches every time he came over (*mould theory) and then, again, animals in the woods, white pale things dangling their way across the road swinging an unwieldy body from pathway to pathway. He says there's an aura here, says that the shadows are darker here, just being here makes him ill. He came back for a year, from uni, to get away from the incredible rent. He's going back to uni next year, obviously regretting his decision.

What a weird fucking place. I've started giving statblocks to my hallucinations as a way of coping with them lmfao. in lockdown I went insane and began worshiping a pantheon of 7 gods, I stat the hallucinations based on each god lol

[kubamo]

loving that this is what pinterest immediately associates with the non-binary pronoun

[kubamo]

god I would so smoke a blunt with kasa-obake