laurinnnn - Tumblr blog

[laurinnnn]

change of state

you are muted eyes, dull gaze

hooded cloak, scarred face

someone else entirely

from the kid you used to be

you are bitten lips, teeth stained

keep your anger restrained

your feelings will evaporate;

it's nothing but a change of state

[laurinnnn]

This is so good what!!!!

31/03/2024

i'll cut out my heart and lay it in your palm

"this is me, all of me, please keep it warm"

as blood runs down your arm you’ll ask if it hurts

and i'll say, "not a lot, losing you would be worse"

(it doesn't hurt a lot, but it always hurts)

[laurinnnn]

14/2/24

I saw my father smile today

A naive smile, tainted by love

the lack of knowledge of what would come

a life of storms ahead

I miss that man

so full of love he could be

life had not yet broken him

had broken us

I miss that man so much

I saw my father smile today

smile at me,

with pride and without judgement

but to wish for it to happen now would be foolish

Old pictures are nothing but old memories

Now they are forgotten

When all love is rotten

All pride is dust

.

.

.

draft i finished today

[laurinnnn]

26/1/24

I am loosing my light

I am loosing my mind

See what i am

I am barely alive

No longer breathing

I am barely alive

I am loosing my art

I am loosing my time

Can you see me down here?

I am barely alive

God I need to be seen

I am barely alive

I am loosing my self

I am loosing my soul

What have I become

I am barely alive

When will this be done

I am barely alive

My light it is lost

inside of my mind

I am barely alive

I am barely alive

.

.

.

sorry this might be a little depressing 🙏🏻

[laurinnnn]

new hat i customised feat. keaton henson pins @laurinnnn gifted me (:

[laurinnnn]

[laurinnnn]

WTF THATS SO AMAZING

Finally got this finnished🥳🎉🎉

Probably the longest I've ever spent on one piece but I'm so glad I kept at it, the amount of times I wanted to give up

[laurinnnn]

LITERALLY THE COOLEST SKUNK I MET

in my skunk/raccoon era btw

[laurinnnn]

why are you so cool

Im acoustic

[laurinnnn]

4/11/23

When I step outside at night

for a smoke and some memories,

I feel sorry for myself once in a while

coughing up some grey stuff

biting my nails

and waiting for the blood to dry

Seven minutes left.

I should check on the pizza

Five minutes left.

I wait for you to text back.

You never do.

I know that

but a little hope can’t hurt.

A couple walks by.

Giggling.

Good for them.

The cigarette burns my lips.

Time to get back inside.

I should get to sleep

Damn it my pizza.

Burned.

Maybe I’ll order out again

[laurinnnn]

Guilty of hurting

I often feel ashamed of my love

and the pain that comes with it

The vulnerability of opening up to someone and knowing

knowing

that they could turn it against you

at any given time

You give a part of you away

that can never be returned

It leaves an emptiness

Which burns when not replaced

But the burning hurts less

than keeping the part of you

that begs to be theirs

Why are those considered weak who feel?

How does that make sense?

Am I weak for giving

when I could risk loosing all?

Or does it just make me stupid?

Id rather be stupid than weak.

Thanks to you society I guess

Another one of your great rules.

Funny how something that dissolves every inch of your body and tears you apart

Is the thing that keeps you together

I would keep holding onto it a live time

Always in the back of my pocket

Like a little bird as my companion

So I’d never be fully alone

For the one I would die.

For him I would live.

.

.

.

.

Impulsive love poem I wrote out of feelings I suppressed for too long.

[laurinnnn]

You wanna know what it’s like?

To scream into the void?

And just know it might (maybe) listen back?

Well then listen closely.

Closer.

Closer still.

Do you hear the scream?

For you?

(No? Or not yet?)

Then you have your answer,

Waiting in a palm of one of someone’s hands.

You just have to find it.

To know your answer.

But plot twist; you’ll never know what hand you’ve reached for,

Is the right.

So I guess you (we) keep grasping.

[laurinnnn]

soup

[laurinnnn]

vest update lol

[laurinnnn]

Pfp for my sister:)

[laurinnnn]

[laurinnnn]

Forget me

Sometimes I hurt too much.

So much that I wish

all would forget who I was.

The loved ones

I got to meet along the way

and the ones I grew up with.

Some would leave, some would stay.

I would beg to the gods,

to the devils and demons

and all the other mystical beings.

Let them all forget so the pain of my loss would not be.

And I could forever be me and be free.