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GAH MY BOYFRIEND LITERALLYđ©
Doggy style with Simon đ€ (nsfw)
The way he'll pound you as hard as he can so he can see your ass jiggle with each thrust. His huge hands grab onto your hips, holding you still as he fucks into you.
âFuck, fuck, fuck. Baby, fuck, this pussy is so good,â he grunts, spanking your ass, grinning when you whine.
He leans down, pressing his chest against your back, one of his hands moving to fondle your tits, feeling them in his hands. He kneads and squeezes them before pinching your nipples, relishing in the way you writhe.
He pulls back straightening up again, and watches your back for a moment before pushing you down so your face and chest meet the mattress. Your back arches perfectly, pushing your ass up for him.
He fucks you harder. He's losing control.
âJesus fucking Christ, you're so perfect,â he groans as he moves a hand under you, finding your clit and rubbing it in time with his thrusts.
Gonna come on my cock, baby? Gonna come on my cock like the good girl I know you are?â he asks, feeling your pussy clenching around him. âYeah, you are. And then, I'm gonna come on this pretty ass. This perfect ass. Fuck, it's like you're just made for me.â
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Taglist
@booboobear-12 @lilychristine01 @smzyyx @mxsatorisimp @akkahelenaa @crypticlxrsh
*if you wanna be added to my Ghost taglist, lmk â€ïž
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#simon riley#simon riley x you#simon riley smut#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#simon riley cod#simon ghost riley#ghost smut#ghost x reader#ghost cod
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I need my bfđ
truly


summary: After seeing Scott and Jean's newborn, Logan gets baby fever. word count: 6.6k+ pairing: Logan Howlett x fem!reader notes: here was the request that inspired this! i will say, anon who requested this, it got a little out of hand, lol. so enjoy 2 smut scenes. this is set in the same world as Deck The Halls and i just need this love spiral but you don't have to read those to understand this! (title is a song by cigarettes after sex) warnings/tags: reader and logan have a bio kid, laura, fluff, talks of having a baby, smut, oral (f!receiving), unprotected piv, creampie, breeding kink, fingering, cum play (?)
The four of you were visiting the X-Mansion to see the new addition to the family, Rachel Summers.
Laura and Sierra had already dashed off to the backyard with some of the other kids, leaving you and Logan alone with Jean and Scott.
"Here," Jean said, carefully transferring Rachel into your arms. "She's fed, changed, and hopefully about to nap."
You grinned, gently settling Rachel against your shoulder. "I've got her. Go take a break."
Jean let out a relieved sigh. "Youâre amazing, Y/N. I havenât had an hour to myself in days."
Scott chuckled softly. "More like weeks."
Jean lightly elbowed him. "Be quiet."
"Go," you insisted softly, waving her away. "Weâve got this."
Jean nodded gratefully, already backing out of the room. "Thank you."
Scott followed behind her, offering Logan a quick grin. "Donât let the girls destroy the place, please."
"No promises," Logan said dryly.
As they left, you gently rocked Rachel, smiling down at her. "Hey, pretty girl. You gonna sleep for your Auntie Y/N?"
Logan watched from a few feet away, hands tucked casually in his pockets, his eyes fixed on you and Rachel. "Looks good on you."
You glanced up, raising a brow. "What?"
He tilted his head toward Rachel. "That. Babies. Always did."
You laughed softly, moving slowly back and forth. "Yeah, well, Iâm just glad ours are finally sleeping through the night."
He snorted. "Mostly."
"Mostly," you agreed.
He stepped closer, leaning against the table next to you. Rachelâs tiny fingers curled sleepily against your shoulder, eyes blinking drowsily before finally shutting. Loganâs eyes softened just slightly.
"I forgot how small they are at this stage," he murmured quietly.
"Yeah," you sighed, gently smoothing Rachel's hair. "Time goes by fast."
Logan watched the baby settle peacefully in your arms, his eyes thoughtful. "Laura and Sierra used to do that too."
"What, sleep?"
He smiled faintly. "Be quiet for longer than five minutes."
You grinned, keeping your voice low. "They're not that bad."
"Not that bad," he repeated dryly. "Laura's probably climbing a tree right now, and Sierraâs probably giving her ideas."
"True," you conceded with a chuckle.
Loganâs gaze drifted again to Rachelâs peaceful little face, the faint rise and fall of her chest. A tiny pang of something tugged deep in his chest, something he wouldnât dare admit out loud.
"You want to hold her?" you offered gently, sensing his quiet contemplation.
He hesitated a moment, then shook his head. "Nah. Looks like she's comfy with you."
You smiled softly, carefully swaying back and forth. "Suit yourself."
Logan shifted, still watching. A beat passed before he cleared his throat. "Scott and Jean seem good."
"They are," you said. "Exhausted, but good."
"Yeah," he muttered, rubbing the back of his neck thoughtfully. "A newbornâll do that."
You gave him a curious look. "You okay?"
"Yeah." Logan straightened slightly, clearing his throat again. "Just... thinking."
Your lips curved into a knowing smile. "Thinking about what?"
He shrugged lightly, voice careful. "Nothin'. Just... been a while since we had one this little."
You chuckled softly, shifting Rachel gently. "Someoneâs getting nostalgic."
He snorted quietly. "Maybe a little."
"Well, you can always babysit Rachel," you teased softly. "Jean would probably be thrilled."
He cracked a faint smile, shaking his head. "Think I'll leave that to you."
"Mhm," you hummed knowingly, still watching him closely. "Sure."
Rachel stirred slightly, fussing softly in her sleep. Logan moved instinctively closer, a hand coming up to carefully rub the babyâs tiny back, helping soothe her immediately. He paused when he noticed your raised brow.
"What?" he muttered defensively. "Ainât lost my touch yet."
You smiled, tilting your head. "No, you havenât."
He watched Rachel settle down again, peaceful and warm against your chest. That gentle tug deepened quietly, making him sigh softly under his breath.
"I'll go check on Laura and Sierra," he muttered, pulling back carefully.
You smiled gently, letting him retreat. "Okay."
Logan paused at the doorway, glancing back once more. The sight of you holding Rachelâso natural, so easyâwas etched warmly into his mind. He shook his head slightly, hiding a smile as he disappeared into the hall.
---
The house was quietâafter getting back to the cabin late, Laura and Sierra took their showers then got into bed.
You stepped out of the bathroom and into the bedroom, Logan sitting on the bed with a notebook in his hands.
âYou ever think âbout ânother one?â he asked, still lazily doodling.
You glanced at him, pausing with your towel still wrapped around you. âAnother what?â
Logan looked up, meeting your eyes. âBaby.â
You smiled faintly, resuming your movements as you searched for clothes. âNot much. Maybe a few times.â
He hummed quietly, his pencil pausing. âToday got me thinkinâ.â
You chuckled softly, pulling a shirt from the dresser. âSeeing Rachel gave you baby fever?â
He shrugged, setting the notebook down. âMaybe a little.â
You turned to him, amusement on your face. âYouâre serious?â
He raised an eyebrow. âDonât sound so shocked, darlinâ.â
âNot shocked,â you said, pulling the shirt on over your head. âJust surprised, I guess. Thought you liked finally gettinâ sleep again.â
He snorted. âSleepâs overrated.â
âEasy for you to say,â you teased, tugging on a pair of shorts.
Logan watched you, quiet for a moment before speaking again. âWouldnât be so bad though, right?â
You paused, looking up to meet his eyes. âAnother baby?â
He nodded slowly, leaning back against the headboard. âYeah. Sierraâd probably like beinâ a big sister.â
You smiled softly, moving toward the bed. âLaura already is one.â
âYeah, but sheâd probably love bossinâ around another sibling,â he smirked. âAnd Sierraâs gettinâ pretty independent.â
You climbed onto the bed beside him, crossing your legs and looking thoughtful. âYouâre really thinking about this.â
âLike I said,â he murmured, eyes gentle as he studied your face, âtoday got me thinkinâ.â
You tilted your head, a soft smile curving your lips. âAre you saying you want another baby?â
He reached out, tugging you gently closer until you settled across his lap. âMaybe I am.â
You laughed softly, sliding your arms around his neck. âLogan Howlett, secretly a softie.â
He rolled his eyes, brushing his thumb along your hip. âKeep it quiet. Got a reputation to uphold.â
You hummed, leaning in, lips brushing his gently. âAnother baby, huh?â
He kissed you softly, pulling back just enough to meet your eyes again. âOnly if you want.â
Your gaze softened, fingertips trailing lightly along his jaw. âWouldnât be so bad.â
He smiled slowly, hands slipping beneath your shirt, warm against your skin. âThat a yes?â
You laughed, pulling him closer. âYeah, Logan. Thatâs a yes.â
âGood,â he muttered, lips ghosting along your neck. âFigured weâd better get started.â
âNow? I just took a shower and put my clothes on.â
Loganâs lips barely brushed yours as he murmured, âGood thing Iâm the one who takes âem off,â voice low, teasing, full of promise. His hands were already sliding under your shirt, warm palms grazing bare skin as his mouth found your jaw, then lowerâkissing along the line of your throat like he had all the time in the world.
You sighed, eyes fluttering as he eased you back against the pillows, but a flicker of something practical snuck in through the haze. âDid you lock the door?â
He groaned, forehead dropping against your chest for a second. âFuckinâââ He sighed, kissed you once, then reluctantly shifted back. âYou ruin all my fun, yâknow that?â
You grinned, tugging the hem of your shirt up. âGo lock it, old man.â
He muttered something under his breath about being cockblocked by fatherhood and stomped off toward the door. A second later, you heard the lock slide into place. Then a scrapeâhe was dragging the chair under the knob.
You laughed, covering your mouth to muffle it. âParanoid much?â
âSierra picks locks now,â Logan growled as he returned, eyes dark and determined. âNot takinâ chances.â
Before you could say another word, he was back over you, hand splayed on your stomach, pressing you into the mattress. He shoved your shirt up to your ribs, mouth finding the underside of your breast, stubble scraping along your skin, tongue hot and slow as he sucked a mark against your ribs.
âStill smell like soap,â he muttered against your skin. âGonna fix that.â
You gasped when his teeth grazed your nipple through the fabric, your hand flying to his hair. âLoganââ
He shoved your shirt up over your head and tossed it aside, then sat back on his heels, tugging your shorts and panties down in one rough pull. âBeen thinkinâ about this since the second you held that baby. Looked like a fuckinâ dream. Like I needed to put another one in you.â
You flushed, heartbeat pounding as he lowered himself between your thighs, spreading them apart with firm hands. He kissed your inner thigh firstâslow, wet, open-mouthed kisses trailing higher, teasing heat.
Then his tongue flickedâslow, deliberate, dragging up through your foldsâand your breath caught hard.
You reached down, tangling a hand in his hair. âThought you were impatient.â
His voice was muffled against your cunt, lips slick, tongue dipping low. âCan still enjoy it, sweetheart. Gotta get you ready, donât I?â
His mouth was hot, deliberate, tongue sliding in slow circles around your clit, then back down, teasing your entrance, sucking one of your lips between his teeth just enough to make your thighs twitch. One of his hands slid up, spreading you wider, while the other held your hip down when it bucked.
You let out a breathy moan, biting your knuckle to stay quiet. âL-Loganââ
He didnât stop. He groaned low against you like you were his favorite meal, tongue flattening and dragging hard and slow right over your clit againâwet, unrelenting pressure that made your eyes roll.
Your hips jerked and he growled, fingers digging into your thigh. âStay still.â
You whimpered, breath catching. âF-fuckââ
He pulled back just long enough to say, voice all gravel and heat, âThatâs it, sweetheart. Just relax. Let me taste you.â
Then he dove back in, and this time he didnât hold backâtongue pressing deep, lips sealing around your clit and sucking with filthy precision. The wet, obscene sounds of it filled the room, and your thighs trembled as heat snapped up your spine.
His hand moved, one thick finger sliding into you slow and curling just right, and your back arched off the bed, a helpless cry breaking from your throat.
âFuckâLoganâoh my godââ
He moaned against you like your taste was the best damn thing heâd had all year, and when he added a second finger, stretching you, working you open, it was almost too much. You squirmed, gasped, toes curling as heat bloomed sharp and fast in your belly.
"A-ahhhâfuck, Loganâ"
His tongue didnât stop, his lips slick with you, beard damp against your thighs. âMmhhhn,â he growled low, the sound vibrating right through your clit like a goddamn electric current. His fingers curled again, slow and dirty, dragging along that spot that made your back arch like a bow.
You reached down blindly, tangling your fingers in his thick hair, gripping tight. âS-shitâLogan, Iâm gonnaââ
He didnât even lift his head, just sucked harder, lips locking around your clit, two thick fingers buried deep and fucking slow, pushing you right over that edge without mercy. It hit like a damn freight train, ripped the air from your lungs.
"Loganâohmygodâ"
Your hips jerked, your thighs clenched around his head, and you came hard against his mouth, a helpless, strangled moan punching from your chest as your body shook apart under him. He didnât stopâkept licking, slower now, easing you through it, savoring it like he wanted to bottle the sound of your wrecked breathing.
"Good girl," he rasped when he finally came up for air, voice dark and hungry, mouth glistening with you. "Fuckin' love when you fall apart on my tongue."
You were still panting, trembling slightly, your skin flushed all over. âY-youâre a menace,â you managed, trying to blink him into focus as he crawled up your body.
He grinned, wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, then leaned in to kiss you, and you could taste yourself on his tongue. Hot. Filthy. You moaned into it, hands tugging him closer.
"Not done," he murmured against your lips. "Not nearly fuckin' done."
You reached down between you, felt him thick and hard through his sweats. He hissed between his teeth when your palm pressed against him, his hips twitching.
âGet these off,â you whispered, tugging at the waistband.
He didnât waste a second, shoved them down and kicked them off, his cock springing freeâthick, heavy, flushed at the tip and already leaking. You bit your lip at the sight, reaching to wrap your hand around him, stroking slow. He groaned, low and rough, head dropping to your shoulder.
"Fuck, darlinâ... been thinkinâ about this all fuckinâ day."
"Yeah?" you murmured, breath hot against his neck, hand still moving. âAbout knocking me up again?â
He growled, deep and hot in his throat, hips rolling into your grip. âMhm. Watchinâ you hold that babyâmade me wanna bend you over right there and fill you up. Stuff you full, see if it takes.â
You shuddered, moaned softly, your thighs squeezing together. âLoganâŠâ
He grinned, dark and wild, then reached down and hooked your leg over his arm, lining himself up with your entrance. His cock nudged against your soaked folds, teasing the head through your slick. "You want it?"
"God, yesâpleaseâ"
That was all it took. He pushed in slow, dragging a deep groan from both of you as you stretched around him. Inch by thick, fucking inch, he sank into you, filling you up with no resistance, just wet heat and pressure that made your head spin.
"Shhhhit," he breathed, eyes fluttering shut, jaw clenched tight. "Tight as ever⊠fuckinâ perfect."
You whimpered, clutching his arms as he bottomed out, hips flush against yours. The stretch, the fullnessâit burned in the best way, had you writhing under him, thighs already trembling again.
"Move," you begged softly, voice catching. "PleaseâLoganâ"
He did. Slow at firstârolling his hips in smooth, dragging thrusts that had your eyes rolling back, the head of his cock grinding deep, right where you were still sensitive. You gasped, clawed at his back.
"That what you need?" he rasped, breath hot against your ear. "Want me to fuck another baby into you?"
You nodded, whimpering, too far gone to answer with anything but a broken moan. âUh-huhâahhâyesâf-fuckââ
He picked up the pace, thrusts harder now, deeper, the sound of skin on skin echoing in the quiet room. You could hear the chair scraping faintly under the doorknob every time the headboard knocked against the wall. Didn't matter. Let it fall. Let it shatter.
âYouâre gonna take every fuckinâ drop,â he growled, one hand sliding under your thigh to lift it higher, angling deeper, harder. âGonna make me a daddy again, sweetheart?â
You cried out, eyes wide and hazy. âY-yeahâyeahâwant itâwant youââ
"Thatâs my girl," he groaned, slamming into you, pace relentless now. "Gonna breed this pretty pussy till youâre knocked up. Fill you so fuckinâ deep youâll still be leaking me tomorrow."
You moaned, helpless under him, his body caging you in, his cock dragging against every sensitive spot inside. It was too much, too goodâyour second orgasm building sharp and fast. Your nails bit into his back.
"L-LoganâgonnaâI'mâfuckâ"
"Yeah, baby, I got you," he panted, snapping his hips harder, faster. "Come on my cockâ"
You shattered around him with a scream, back arched, body clenching down so tight around him he cursed loud against your throat.
âFuuuckâyouâre squeezinâ meâshitâ!â
He slammed in hard one last time, then froze, cock twitching deep as he spilled into you, growling loud and low through gritted teeth, his whole body shaking. You felt itâhot, thick spurts of come painting your insides, filling you up just like he promised.
He stayed there, buried deep, chest heaving, his weight warm on top of you as both of you tried to catch your breath.
Then he chuckled, breathless, voice still wrecked. âThatâs one hell of a start.â
You snorted, weakly swatting at his arm. âYou're insatiable.â
He smirked, nuzzling into your neck. âWith you? Damn right.â
His cock was still twitching inside you, and he didnât moveâjust held you, sweaty and tangled, not caring about the mess between your legs, the heat of your skin sticking to his. You stroked a hand through his hair, still dazed and sore in the best way, heart thudding against his chest.
You didnât say anything else for a long moment. You didnât need to.
Then Logan shifted, pulling back just enough to look at you. His eyes were warm, wild, a little wicked. âRound twoâs gonna be messier.â
Your breath hitched. You smiled. âGood.â
---
A few weeks later, Sierra sat at the kitchen table drawing a picture for Rachel with her crayons. You were at the stove, making a pie for Jean and Scott.
Logan and Laura sat with Sierra, both of them readingâLogan a newspaper, and Laura a comic.
Then, Sierra spoke up. âDaddy, how are babies made?â
Logan choked on his coffee as Laura let out a snort. "What?"
Sierra tilted her head, blinking at him innocently. "How are babies made?"
Laura snickered again, hiding behind her comic. "Yeah, Dad. How are they made?"
Logan shot Laura a pointed glare. "Not helpin', kid."
You pressed your lips together, fighting to stay serious as you turned to Sierra. "Why do you ask, honey?"
"'Cause Rachel is a baby, and Jean said she grew in her tummy," Sierra said, still coloring carefully. "How'd she get in there?"
Lauraâs eyes sparkled with mischief. "Yeah, Dad. How did Rachel get in Jeanâs tummy?"
Loganâs jaw ticked. "Youâre grounded."
Laura rolled her eyes, clearly not taking his threat seriously.
You sighed softly, leaning against the counter. "Well, Sierra, when two people love each other very muchâ"
Laura snorted again, louder this time. Logan shot her another look. "Laura."
"Sorry," she said, not sorry at all.
Sierra looked at Logan expectantly. "So how'd she get in there?"
Logan rubbed a hand over his face, sighing heavily. "Magic."
Sierra's eyes widened. "Magic?"
Laura laughed outright this time, ducking behind her comic to hide it.
You shot Logan an amused glance. "Really? Magic?"
Logan shrugged defensively. "You got somethin' better?"
You walked over, gently brushing Sierraâs hair back. "Babies come from love, sweetheart. When two grown-ups love each other very much, they decide they want a baby. Then one grows in the mommyâs tummy."
Sierra frowned thoughtfully. "Like planting flowers?"
Laura snorted loudly again. "Iâm gonna die."
Logan leaned toward Laura, lowering his voice. "Keep it up, kid, and youâre gonna have this conversation next."
Laura immediately sobered, returning quietly to her comic.
"Sort of like planting flowers," you said gently. "A seed gets planted, and it grows into a baby."
"How does the seed get there?" Sierra asked, eyes big and curious.
Logan cleared his throat loudly, folding his paper. "Iâm gonna go chop some firewood."
You shot him a pointed look. "Logan."
He sighed, looking resigned as he turned back to Sierra. "The seed... just gets put there."
Sierra narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "By who?"
Loganâs eye twitched slightly. "The... other grown-up."
You smiled sweetly at Logan. "Good job, honey."
He shot you a dry look. "Thanks."
Sierra seemed satisfied enough, nodding thoughtfully. "Oh. Okay."
Logan exhaled in relief, taking another careful sip of coffee. Laura smirked behind her comic.
"So, Daddy put the seed in your tummy when you had me?" Sierra asked suddenly, eyes brightening with realization.
Logan promptly choked again.
Laura burst out laughing. "Amazing."
Logan pointed a finger at her, voice rough. "Grounded. For real."
Sierra smiled happily, oblivious to Logan's distress. "Right, Mommy?"
You patted Sierra's head gently, trying not to laugh at Logan's red face. "Thatâs right, sweetheart."
Sierra grinned, returning to her drawing. "Daddyâs good at planting seeds."
Laura howled with laughter, dropping her comic. Logan groaned, covering his face with his hand.
You bit your lip, fighting back a laugh. "Maybe letâs talk about something else now."
"Please," Logan muttered weakly. "Anything else."
---
The next afternoon, Logan walked into the living room, wiping sweat from his forehead with the edge of his shirt. He paused when he saw you sitting cross-legged on the couch, sorting through a box of tiny baby clothes.
He raised an eyebrow. "Ainât wastinâ time, huh?"
You glanced up, smiling softly. "Just figured Iâd see what we still have from Sierra."
He stepped closer, peering into the box and reaching down to lift a small yellow onesie. His expression softened as he ran his thumb over the tiny fabric. "Forgot how little these things are."
You chuckled quietly. "You said that about Rachel."
"Yeah," he murmured. He looked up again, studying you carefully. "You feelinâ alright?"
You smiled reassuringly. "I'm good."
He nodded, thoughtful. "So we really doin' this, huh?"
You tilted your head playfully. "Second thoughts already?"
"Nah," he said, voice firm. "Just makin' sure you're sure."
"I'm sure," you said warmly, tugging gently at his hand until he sat beside you. "How about you?"
His eyes softened. "Darlin', I was sure the second I brought it up."
You leaned in, brushing a soft kiss to his cheek. "Good."
Logan wrapped an arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his side as he watched you fold a tiny shirt. After a quiet moment, he cleared his throat softly. "Laura asked me about it earlier."
You glanced up curiously. "What did she say?"
"Asked if we were really thinkinâ about another kid," he said. "Think she likes the idea."
"That's good," you said softly, smiling. "Sierra already acts like a mini-mom anyway."
He snorted gently. "She bossed me around for fifteen minutes earlier âbout how to feed Rocky. Pretty sure that dog ainât listeninâ to anyone but her now."
You laughed quietly, leaning your head against his shoulder. "Well, at least we know sheâs ready to help."
He hummed softly, fingers gently tracing patterns on your arm. "Yeah."
There was a comfortable silence between you, Logan's steady heartbeat soothing beneath your ear. Thenâ
"Mommy," Sierra said from the doorway, her expression deeply serious, "Rocky ate my crayons again."
Logan sighed deeply, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Told you, he donât listen to anyone but her."
You chuckled softly, sitting up to look at Sierra. "How many did he eat?"
She held up her fingers. "Three. And one was blue."
Logan grunted, standing up with a resigned sigh. "I'll handle it."
"Thank you," you said sweetly, earning a faintly amused glance from him as he headed toward Sierra.
"You're lucky youâre cute," he muttered affectionately to Sierra, ruffling her hair gently as they disappeared into the hallway.
You smiled to yourself, settling back against the couch and resting a hand lightly on your stomach, already looking forward to the chaos ahead.
---
Just a week later, you got your period. You werenât necessarily disappointedâyou and Logan had only tried once.
You stepped out of the bathroom, catching Loganâs curious glance from where he sat on the bed, tying his boots.
"No luck?" he guessed.
You shrugged lightly, unbothered. "Not this month."
Logan raised a brow, mouth curling into a faint smirk. "Guess I'll have to try harder."
You snorted, rolling your eyes playfully. "Yeah, I guess you will."
He leaned back on the bed, studying you carefully. "You good?"
"Yeah," you assured him, stepping closer. "Took a few months with Sierra too, remember?"
"I remember," he said quietly, pulling you toward him until you settled comfortably against his chest. "I ain't worried."
You smiled, fingers playing lightly with his collar. "Neither am I."
He brushed his thumb along your hip. "Besides, practice makes perfect, right?"
You laughed softly, shaking your head. "Always looking on the bright side."
"Hey," he teased, voice low and warm. "Never heard you complain."
You hummed, leaning up to kiss him lightly. "Guess we'll just have to try again."
"Exactly my plan," he muttered, lips brushing yours softly. "Tonight?"
âMmh.â You scrunched your brows together. âNo. Sorry, honey. I just wanna lay in bed and eat ice cream.â
Logan chuckled softly, pressing a gentle kiss to your temple. "Ice cream, huh?"
"Mmhm," you hummed, settling comfortably against his chest. "Salted caramel."
He tilted his head thoughtfully. "Pretty sure Laura ate the last of that yesterday."
You groaned dramatically. "Seriously?"
"Yup," he said, voice low and amused. "Saw her sneakinâ the tub back into the freezer."
"Sheâs your kid," you muttered. "Stealinâ my ice cream."
"Our kid," Logan corrected, thumb stroking lightly along your side. "And Sierra steals your cookies."
You sighed heavily. "I never get anything around here."
Logan snorted. "Welcome to my world, darlinâ."
You smiled faintly, tilting your head to look at him. "Can you go to the store?"
He raised an eyebrow. "For ice cream?"
"Yes."
"Right now?"
You gave him your best pleading look. "Please?"
Logan groaned softly, head dropping back against the pillows. "Fine."
You grinned, kissing him quickly. "Youâre the best."
He rolled his eyes playfully, shifting you carefully off his chest as he stood. "Iâll remember this next time I need a favor."
You stretched lazily across the bed. "Iâll be here waiting."
Logan gave you an amused glance as he grabbed his keys from the dresser. "Donât doubt it."
You heard his footsteps fading as he walked down the hall, followed by Sierraâs curious voice. "Daddy, where you goinâ?"
"Your mom needs ice cream," Logan answered gruffly.
"Ooh," Sierra said excitedly. "Can I have some?"
"Nope," Logan said firmly. "You and your sister ate hers already."
There was a brief pause. Then Sierra called toward your room, voice filled with concern, "Sorry, Mommy!"
You laughed quietly, shaking your head. "Itâs okay, baby!"
Then, the front door opened and shut, and a few seconds later, Lauraâs head appeared in the doorway of your bedroom, eyebrows raised.
"Dad went out just for ice cream?" she asked skeptically.
You shrugged innocently. "He loves me."
Laura smirked. "Youâre spoiled."
"Jealous?" you teased.
Laura shrugged lightly, a grin tugging at her lips. "Maybe."
You chuckled softly. "Good. You should be."
Laura shook her head, turning to leave. "Iâll tell Sierra to leave you alone âtil heâs back."
"Thanks, Laura," you called after her.
A moment later, the house was quiet again, and you relaxed into the pillows, smiling to yourself. A quiet night, ice cream, and Loganâexactly what you needed.
---
A few nights later, the house was finally quiet. Laura and Sierra had both been asleep for at least an hour, and Rocky was curled up contentedly on his bed in the living room.
You stood by the kitchen sink, absently rinsing dishes from dinner, lost in thought until Loganâs hands slid around your waist, pulling you back gently against his chest.
âKids asleep,â he murmured softly against your ear, voice low and warm.
You smiled, leaning into his warmth. âMm. I noticed.â
His lips brushed the side of your neck, lingering softly. âRockyâs passed out too.â
You laughed quietly. âYou sound like youâre plotting something.â
âMaybe I am,â Logan muttered, teeth scraping lightly along your pulse point, making your breath hitch.
You set the dish down, water dripping off your fingers as you turned in his arms, tilting your head up to meet his gaze. âFeeling lucky tonight?â
His eyes darkened slightly, hands tightening around your hips. âYeah, darlinâ. Pretty damn lucky.â
You chuckled, fingertips brushing lightly along his jaw. âConfident.â
Loganâs mouth curved into a faint smirk. âGot every reason to be.â
He leaned down, capturing your mouth softly, the kiss slow and deep. You melted into him, fingers gripping his shirt as he pressed you back gently against the counter. When you finally broke apart, breathless, you smiled against his lips.
âGuess we should make the most of a quiet house,â you whispered.
âExactly what I was thinkinâ,â he agreed, voice rough.
He didnât waste another second. Logan lifted you easily, setting you onto the counter and stepping between your legs. Your breath hitched as his hands slid beneath your shirt, tracing warm paths along your skin.
âYou think tonightâs the night?â you asked quietly, eyes locked on his.
Logan smiled softly, brushing your hair from your face. âHope so.â
You laughed, hooking your ankles around his waist and tugging him closer. âThen we better get started.â
Loganâs eyes sparked with amusement and heat. âYes, maâam.â
He leaned in again, kissing you hard and deep, hands gripping your hips firmly. You let yourself get lost in him, warmth curling low in your stomach as he pulled you flush against him, grinding slowly, deliberately, the friction making you gasp softly into his mouth.
He broke the kiss briefly, his voice ragged against your ear. âGonna take this to the bedroom, darlinâ. Counter ainât exactly comfortable for what I got planned.â
You laughed breathlessly, fingers tangling in his hair. âLead the way.â
He lifted you easily off the counter, keeping you wrapped securely around him. You pressed slow kisses along his neck, smiling against his skin as he carried you toward your room.
âBetter lock the door,â you teased quietly.
âWay ahead of ya,â he muttered, kicking the door shut and clicking the lock into place.
You didnât even get a word out before Loganâs mouth was on yours againâhot and demanding, like he hadnât just had his hands all over you ten seconds ago. He walked you backward toward the bed without breaking the kiss, one hand gripping your ass, the other tangled in your hair.
By the time the backs of your knees hit the mattress, you were already gasping into his mouth, dizzy with heat. He eased you down onto the bed, crawling over you slow like a fucking wolf, all heat and weight and hunger.
You slid your hands up under his shirt, fingertips brushing hot skin and hard muscle. âOff,â you mumbled, tugging at the fabric.
Logan grinned against your neck. âBossy tonight.â
âYou love it.â
âDamn right I do.â
He sat back on his heels, yanking his shirt over his head in one smooth pull. You reached for your own, but he caught your wrists.
âNuh-uh, lemme do it.â
His voice had gone low, darkâgravel scraped through honey. He peeled your shirt up slow, kissing every inch of skin he revealed. Stomach. Ribs. The underside of your breast. He paused there, nuzzling warm against you, lips dragging over the swell. You arched into him with a soft gasp, fingers tightening in the sheets.
Then he wrapped his mouth around your nipple, sucking slow, deepâjust onceâbefore switching to the other, tongue flicking in lazy circles until your breath hitched and your thighs rubbed together on instinct.
âLoganâŠâ
âShh. I got you.â
He kissed down your belly, thumbs hooking into your waistband, dragging your shorts and panties off in one slow pull. His gaze never left yours. Even with the heat low in his belly and the tension buzzing through his limbs, he wasnât gonna rush a damn thing.
âYou ready?â he asked, fingers trailing up the inside of your thigh.
You nodded, breath caught somewhere in your chest. âPlease.â
That smug little smirk curved across his face, and he leaned in, kissing you againâsoft this time, like he was savoring itâwhile his fingers slid down and dipped between your folds.
You moaned into his mouth, your hips rocking up as he rubbed slow circles over your clit, his fingers slick and teasing. Then he pushed one insideâslow and deepâand you gasped, clutching at his shoulders.
âFuckâLoganââ
âThatâs it,â he muttered, sucking on your bottom lip. âAlready soaked for me. You really want this, huh?â
You nodded again, barely coherent. âWant you. Want you to fuck a baby into me.â
He groaned low, forehead dropping to yours. âJesus, sweetheartâŠâ
He added a second finger, curling them just right. Your mouth fell open in a silent moan, body trembling as his fingers fucked into you slow and steady.
âIâm gonna knock you up tonight,â he growled, kissing down your throat again, biting at your collarbone. âGonna make you a mama all over again. Youâre gonna feel it, darlinâ. Gonna know it took.â
Your walls fluttered around his fingers, your thighs clenching. âLoganâfuckâI canâtââ
âYes, you can,â he rasped. âGimme one. Right here. All over my hand.â
He pressed his thumb against your clit and you brokeâmoaning, shaking, clinging to him like youâd fall apart without him. Your pussy clamped down on his fingers as you came, soaking his hand with a whimper that died against his shoulder.
He eased you through it, kissed the top of your head, then reached for the pillow, shoving it under your hips with practiced ease.
You blinked up at him, still breathless. âLoganââ
He was already stripping out of his sweats, his cock thick and flushed and heavy in his hand as he lined himself up, eyes locked on yours.
âYou want it?â he asked, voice wrecked. âWant me to fill you up?â
You bit your lip and nodded, legs spreading wider. âPlease.â
He sank into you with a deep, guttural groan, one hand gripping your thigh, the other planted beside your head. His body was hot, heavy, every thick inch of him pushing slow and steady until he bottomed out, hips flush against yours.
âFuck,â he hissed, forehead resting against yours, breath hot. âThis pussyâs gonna take all of me tonight, huh?â
You whimpered, legs wrapping tighter around his waist. âAlways doesâŠâ
âYeah?â He rocked his hips, slow, deep, grinding against your cervix until your back arched. âGonna take my come too, sweetheart? Gonna let me put a baby in you?â
âGodâyes,â you breathed, hands clutching at his back. âWanna make you a daddy again.â
That sound he madeâhalf growl, half moanâwent straight through you. âFuckinâ hell, you say that again and I ainât gonna last long.â
âDo it,â you whispered, eyes locked on his. âCome inside me. Fill me up. Knock me up.â
Logan snarled, hips snapping forward, hard. âYou filthy little thing⊠begginâ to get bred.â
âI want it,â you gasped, breath catching with every ruthless thrust. âNeed it.â
He fucked you harder thenârough, relentless, the bed creaking beneath the rhythm of his hips slamming into yours. His hand left your thigh and pressed against your belly, right above where he was buried inside you.
âRight here,â he growled. âGonna fill you up so full youâll feel it for days.â
You cried out, nails dragging down his back. âPleaseâLoganâfuckâdonât stopââ
âI ainât stoppinâ,â he panted, grinding down. âYouâre takinâ me so fuckinâ good. This tight little cuntâs made to keep me in, yeah?â
You could barely breathe, every thrust knocking the air from your lungs, pleasure spiking sharp and high. âGonnaâgonna comeââ
âYeah?â He leaned in, mouth against your ear. âThen do it. Milk my cock, sweetheart. Get yourself good and ready to catch.â
You shattered around him, legs locking tight around his waist, your whole body pulsing as you screamed his name into his shoulder. He kept going, driving through your climax, chasing his own with that low, animal growl rising in his throat.
âFuckâyouâre squeezinâ me so tightâfuckâIâm gonna comeââ
âDo it,â you begged. âCome inside meâplease, baby, I need itââ
Logan slammed deep and stayed there, cock throbbing as he came hard, spilling into you with a choked moan, burying his face in your neck.
âFuckinâ hell,â he breathed, body trembling. âThatâs itâfuck, thatâs it, take it allâŠâ
You felt him twitch inside you, his come hot and thick, filling you until it leaked out around him.
He didnât move for a long momentâjust laid there, buried deep, one hand splayed across your lower belly like he could feel it taking.
Then he lifted his head, eyes half-lidded and dark. âThat oughta do it.â
You gave him a dazed little smile. âThink you got it in one?â
Logan grinned, kissed you lazy and slow. âMaybe. But better be sure.â
His hand slid down, slow and sure, knuckles brushing between your legsâright where you were still stretched around him, messy and slick with the load heâd just pumped deep inside. His eyes stayed locked on yours as two fingers pressed to your swollen folds, spreading you open just enough to watch it drip out.
âFuckinâ shame,â he muttered. âWastinâ good it like that.â
You shivered, hips twitching as he eased a finger back inside, slow and deep. You gasped, back arching slightly. "Loganâ"
"Shh," he murmured, voice low, gravel-smooth. âLemme make sure it stays where it belongs.â
He added a second finger, thick and insistent, curling them inside you like he knew every sensitive spot by heartâand he did. His thumb rubbed lazy circles over your clit, just enough to make your breath catch, not enough to push you over yet.
Your hips rocked into the motion instinctively, body still greedy for more. âGod⊠youâre not done with me?â
He snorted, lips brushing your cheek. âSweetheart, Iâm just gettinâ started.â
His fingers pumped slow, deliberate, his palm slick with a mix of your arousal and his come, still leaking out around his knuckles. You whimpered, clenching down on him, thighs shaking.
âYou feel that?â he muttered, dragging his lips down your neck, letting his teeth scrape lightly across your skin. âThatâs mine. All of it. Gonna keep pushinâ it in âtil your body holds on tight.â
âLoganâfuckââ you moaned, legs spreading wider for him. âYouâre gonna make me come againâŠâ
âGood,â he growled. âI want you to. That sweet little pussy soaks me every damn time, âcourse youâre gonna come.â
He curled his fingers again, hitting just the right spot, and your whole body jerked, toes curling. You could hear the wet, obscene sound of itâhis hand working between your legs, your pussy clenching greedily around him like it knew what he was trying to do.
âI can feel you pulsinâ around me,â he rasped, kissing down your chest. âJust like that. Keep squeezinâ. Gonna milk it all up inside you.â
You bit your lip, desperate to hold it back, but your body had other plans. With a sharp cry, you came hard, thighs clamping around his wrist as your cunt spasmed around his fingers, milking them like it wanted to keep every drop of him inside.
âThere it is,â he breathed, watching your face like it was the only thing that mattered. âFuck, youâre so goddamn pretty when you come for me.â
You twitched beneath him, breath ragged, and Logan gently eased his fingers out, slick and dripping. He watched the mess on his hand for a second, then brought it to your mouth.
âTaste what youâre takinâ in,â he muttered.
You opened obediently, sucking his fingers between your lips, tasting salt and heat and something that made your whole body ache with want all over again.
He groaned, leaning in to kiss you slow, deep, filthy. âYouâre gonna get pregnant from this,â he whispered against your mouth. âI fuckinâ know it.â
You pulled back just enough to meet his gaze, breath still catching in your throat. âThink so?â
He grinned, cocky and warm, brushing his fingers lightly over your belly. âIâd bet on it.â
You gave a tired, blissed-out laugh. âYou always so sure of yourself?â
He nuzzled close, lips grazing your ear. âOnly when I know Iâm right.â
#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#wolverine x reader#james howlett x reader#james howlett x you#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett fic#logan howlett smut
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I have so many things to say, lemme say this made me smile like an idiot through the entirety. It was super light hearted and just so fucking cute.
AND HIM BEING A BOY DAD?!?!? YES JUST YESSSSSSS, IM SCREAMING!!! donât get me wrong I love girl dad Logan but god!!! đ«¶đ»đ«¶đ»đ«¶đ»
Supermarket Scare
This idea is originally from @rosenclaws and I HAD to write it. (They actually did turn it into a fic which is here) I took the idea, changed a few things (Logan is boy dad in this one I fear), and idk I guess this is what came out of it lmfao

Pairing: Logan Howlett x Reader
Tropes: MILF reader <3
Warnings: None that I know of
Other tags: Logan who is GREAT with kids, but doesnât know it, extra dramatic backstory that may not be legally accurate bc I said so
Background: Youâre raising your adopted son, Arlo, on your own. Wade, Al, and Logan live down the hall from you.
Description: While shopping at the grocery store, you donât realize that Arlo has let go of the shopping cart. When you look down to talk to him, you realize that heâs gone. Thank god for Wadeâs new roommate.
    âCan we get some of those little donuts?â Arlo asked, his small hand gripping the shopping cart as you walked down the bread aisle. He knew the rule, if he wanted to walk instead of riding in the cart, he had to hold onto the cart.
    âSure,â you hummed, âWhat kind? The chocolate ones or the white powdered ones?â You asked.
    âThe white ones,â he decided. âTheyâre yummy.â
    âWhite ones it is,â you nodded, stopping the cart in front of the bread you needed. Turning away, you reached up and grabbed a loaf of bread. âYou wanna pick out some cereal while weâre here too?â You asked, turning back to the cart, only to find that Arlo was gone.Â
    Looking down the aisle, he was nowhere to be seen.
================
    Logan stood on one side of the aisle, observing the different kinds of granola bars. Why were there so many goddamn flavors anyway? His focus was drawn away from the boxes on the shelves when he felt a tug on his pants.
    Looking down, he saw a young boy with tears falling down his cheeks.
    âUh,â Logan froze, not sure how to interact with a child. âHi.â
    âI canât find my mama,â the boy cried, his tears coming down harder.
    âWhat does she look like?â He asked, kneeling down so he was closer to the kidâs height.
    The boy only cried in response, clearly scared and missing his mom.
    âAlright,â he replied, looking around as he stood up and tried to decide what to do. âLetâs go to the front of the store. Then they can find your mom, okay?â
    The boy nodded, letting go of Loganâs pants to hold out both arms at the man. Grabby hands. How could anyone say no to that?
    Logan sighed, debating it in his head before leaning down and scooping the boy into his arms. As he walked to the front of the store, the boyâs tears slowed until they eventually came to a stop. The boy laid his head down on Loganâs shoulder while one of his hands held an iron grip on the front of Loganâs flannel.
    âExcuse me,â Logan spoke, walking up to the customer service desk.
    âHow can I help you?â The woman at the desk asked.
    âHe canât find his mom,â Logan explained, nodding towards the boy in his arms.
    âLet me make an announcement,â the worker gave the boy a sympathetic smile. She picked up a phone from the counter, putting it up to her ear and hitting a few buttons on the keypad. âAttention shoppers, we have a lost little boy at the customer service desk. If he is your child, please come pick him up.â After the announcement was made, she hung the phone up.
    âAlright, kid,â Logan said. âNow you just gotta wait for your mom to come get you.â
    âIâm Cherie,â the worker spoke softly to the boy. âYou wanna stay here with me while we wait on your mom?â She offered, holding out her hands.
    Logan moved to pull the child away from him and hand him to Cherie, but Arlo began to cry again. His grip on Loganâs flannel tightened.
    âCâmon kid, you gotta let go,â Logan encouraged.
    The boy cried harder, bawling as he tried to desperately stay in Loganâs arms.
    âItâs alright, angel,â Cherie hushed. Based on her tone, Logan could tell that this woman had certainly dealt with kids before. She was definitely a better person to watch the boy temporarily, but kids want what they want.
    âOkay, okay,â Logan relented, holding the boy close to his chest again. âIâll stay, just stop crying. You donât have to cry.â He looked to the worker, âIâll stay with him âtil his mom gets here.â
    Despite being secure in Loganâs arms again, the tears didnât stop.
    âShhh,â Logan attempted, gently swaying with the boy in his arms. He wasnât sure what he was doing, but heâd seen mothers do it with their babies before.
    The tears just kept coming.
    Logan looked around, spotting a small display of stuffed animals. He reached out with one hand, grabbing the first one he could and holding it up in front of the boy.
    âLook at this,â he redirected the boyâs attention, shaking the toy slightly.
    Sniffling a few times, the boy in his arms slowly stopped crying. He used his free hand to grab the animal, pulling it to his chest.
    âFox,â he said simply, looking at the orange and white stuffie in his arm. âI like foxes. Thanks.â His voice was barely more than a whisper.
    âYeah, itâs a fox. Youâre welcome,â Logan nodded, just happy that he had made the kid stop crying. With his free hand, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a few dollars. âFor the fox,â he commented to the worker, who just smiled and nodded.
    Logan moved to sit down on a bench in the customer service area. As expected, the boy refused to move from his lap. So, there they sat. Logan, a mutant, and on his lap, a lost kid holding a stuffed fox. Quite the pair.
================
    âOh thank god!â You exclaimed as you walked into the customer service area. âArlo!â
    âMama!â Arlo exclaimed from where he sat on a manâs lap.
    âTold you sheâd be here,â the man said as he helped Arlo down from his lap. He looked familiar, but you were more concerned about Arlo.
    The moment his feet hit the ground, Arlo was running towards you with his arms reaching out.
    As he reached you, you dropped to one knee so you could wrap your arms around him. Your arms held him tightly to your chest.
    âHoney, Iâm so glad youâre okay. I was so worried,â you breathed out, closing your now teary eyes as you held him.
    âIâm sorry,â he said softly, beginning to cry as you held him.
    âHey, itâs alright, sweetheart,â you assured, pulling away enough so you could see each otherâs faces. âYouâre not in trouble. Just promise me you wonât run off like that ever again.â
    âI promise,â he nodded, leaning back in to cling to you.
    You slowly stood, picking Arlo up as you did so.
    âThank you so much,â you spoke to the man that had been with Arlo, who was now standing. Now that you got a good look at him, you knew why you recognized him. âWait, youâre Wadeâs roommate, arenât you?â You asked.
    Logan gives you a strange look, so you continue talking.
    âWe live down the hall,â you explained. âArlo loves talking Wadeâs ear off whenever we run into each other.â
    âProbably because theyâre on the same learning level,â Logan joked. He held out a hand for you to shake as he introduced himself. âLogan.â
    You supported Arlo on your hip as you took his hand in yours. As you shook his hand, you gave him your name in return.
    âAnd, of course, youâve met Arlo,â you added, letting go of his (very warm, very large) hand and squeezing the boy in your arms for emphasis.
    âArlo,â Logan smiled slightly at the boy. He hadnât expected the little munchkin to grow on him so quickly, yet here he was.
    âI knew you,â Arlo stated.
    âYou knew it was Logan?â You asked.
    âI knew he was Wadeâs friend,â he smiled proudly. âThe big guy with kitty ears,â he clarified, pointing to Loganâs hair and giggling.
    âKitty ears?â Logan asked, raising a brow. âIâve never gotten that before.â
    âI like them,â Arlo hummed happily. âThey look like fox ears too,â he observed, holding up the stuffed fox with both hands.
    Logan let out a breathy chuckle, tucking his hands in his pockets.Â
    âThank you again,â you told Logan. âI really owe you big time,â you smiled. âItâs just me and Arlo, I donât know what I wouldâve done if something happened.â
    âNo need,â Logan shook his head. Now that heâd learned it was just you and Arlo, he decided to try and flirt with you. âHeâs a nice kid. And heâs got a very nice mom,â Logan gave you a small grin, which came across as more of a smirk.
    You arenât sure how to react. It wasnât like you had guys lining up to date you. Most of them didnât want to flirt with a single mom. You werenât even sure if he was flirting. What could you say? You were a little out of practice.
    âAt least let me make you dinner,â you offered. You tried not to sound too hopeful, but you were almost positive that youâd failed.
    âPretty please,â Arlo chimed in, sticking out his bottom lip and giving Logan his most convincing puppy dog eyes.
    âWell when you put it like that,â Logan smiled, reaching a hand out to ruffle Arloâs hair, which earned him a giggle. âIâd love to.â
    âIf tomorrow night works for you, we donât have anything going on,â you suggested.
    âSure,â Logan nodded. âIâm free.â
    After deciding on a time, you caught a glance of your watch and realized you had to get Arlo to home to make dinner tonight.
    âWe should get home, gotta finish shopping and get this little gremlin fed,â you chuckled. âArlo, tell Logan goodbye.â
    âBye!â Arlo gave Logan a big grin. âWe can play when you come over tomorrow.â
    âSounds fun,â Logan nodded, smiling at Arlo.
    âWeâll see you tomorrow,â you smiled. âAnd feel free to stop by anytime,â you added as you started to walk away.
================
    âMama! Thereâs someone at the door! I bet itâs Logan,â Arlo exclaimed, running into the kitchen, where you were working on finishing dinner.
    âOkay, okay,â you chuckled, making sure nothing would burn as you wiped your hands off on a towel and headed to the door with Arlo. You checked the peephole, confirming that it was Logan, before opening the door.
    You and Logan didnât have a chance to speak before Arlo was jumping up and down.
    âLogan!â He grinned, practically vibrating with excitement. He held both hands out for Logan.
    âHey, bub,â Logan greeted, picking Arlo up into his arms with a small âwooshâ sound. He then turned his attention to you, smiling softly.
    âIâm just finishing up dinner,â you hummed, stepping aside and letting Logan in. You shut the door behind him as he toed off his shoes neatly next to the door.
    âTake your time,â Logan replied, not wanting you to feel pressured.
    âThat means we can go play in the living room,â Arlo giggled. âMe and Fink were just playing in there.â
    âFink?â Logan raised a brow. What the hell was a Fink?
    âYeah,â he nodded. âThe fox you got me. His name is Fink.â
    âOh,â Logan chuckled softly. âWe can go play with Fink before dinner as long as itâs alright with your mom.â
    âPlease mama,â Arlo looked at you, giving you his brightest smile. âCan me and Logan go play while you cook?â
    âYou can,â you laughed softly at Arloâs excitement. âPlay nice, okay?â
    âI will!â He promised, wriggling around until Logan put him down. He grabbed the manâs hand, tugging on it. âCâmon, câmon, I wanna show you my toys.â
    You and Logan shared an amused look before Logan let Arlo drag him off to your living room.
================
    âHey, you two, dinnerâs rea-,â you stopped mid sentence as you walked into the living room. You hadnât expected the scene in front of you.
    Logan sat on the floor with Arlo, whoâs hair was now pulled up into two tufts on top of his head.
    âLook mama!â Arlo spoke proudly. âI asked Logan to make us match! Do we look cool?â
    âYou look very cool, sweetheart,â you chuckled softly. âYouâre both very handsome. But even cool guys have to eat dinner.â
    âYeah, to be big and strong,â Arlo nodded, hopping up from the floor and rushing off to the table.
    Logan stood up from the floor, groaning softly.
    âDidnât know you were a hairdresser,â you joked as he began following you to the table as well.
    âWell when he gives me those big puppy eyes, I canât say no,â Logan defended.
    âYouâve got me there,â you chuckled softly. âYou can go sit at the table, Iâll bring in dinner.â
================
    Dinner with Logan felt good. Domestic. Arlo yapped about his current favorite show while you and Logan chuckled. As much as you loved Arlo, you did want to talk to Logan without having every other sentence be about Nubs the pooba boy from a Star Wars show Arlo was obsessed with.
    âAlright, bud, itâs time to head to bed,â you hummed to Arlo. After dinner, the three of you had stayed at the table talking, and now it was time for him to get some sleep.
    âDo I have to?â Arlo frowned. âI wanna stay up and play with Logan some more.â
    âListen to your mom,â Logan replied before you could. âIf you go to bed now, we can play another time. Deal?â
    âDeal,â Arlo nodded, accepting Loganâs offer. He climbed out of his chair and walked off in the direction of his room.
    âIf you wanna wait in the living room, Iâll be back out after I get him down,â you told Logan as you stood.
    Logan gave you a nod before you walked off after Arlo to help him get ready for bed.
    âI like Logan,â Arlo stated as you stepped into his room. âHeâs fun.â
    You chuckled softly, getting into Arloâs dresser to pull out a couple pairs of his favorite pajamas. One was yellow and covered in dinosaurs, while the other was light blue with green stripes.
    âWhich pajamas do you wanna wear tonight?â You asked, holding up both pairs for him to pick from.
    âDinosaurs!â He grinned.
    âDinosaurs it is,â you nodded, putting the other pajamas back in the drawer for another night.
    Once Arlo was changed into his pajamas, you helped him brush his teeth. The two of you went back into his room so that he could lay down.
    âWait!â Arlo gasped before he could climb into bed. âI have to go get Fink and tell Logan goodnight.â
    Of course he had to tell Logan goodnight. What had you been thinking?
================
    âLogan!â Arlo giggled as he ran into the living room. Logan was sitting on the couch as he waited for you to come back.
    âI thought you were going to bed,â Logan chuckled at Arloâs energy.
    âHad to come get Fink,â Arlo answered, grabbing the stuffed fox from where heâd left it on a chair before dinner. âAnd I wanted to tell you goodnight,â he smiled, climbing on the couch next to Logan and wrapping his arms around the man to the best of his abilities.
    Logan was surprised, to say the least. It wasnât exactly a regular occurrence for kids to come up and hug him. After a split second of shock, he wrapped both arms around Arlo and gave him a soft squeeze.
    âGânight,â he hummed before letting go of Arlo.
    âGoodnight,â Arlo grinned, planting a kiss on Loganâs cheek before hopping up and running back to his room where you were waiting on him.
    âYou ready to go to sleep now?â You asked as he hopped up on the bed.
    âYep!â He nodded, crawling under his blankets.
    As he got settled, you leaned over and flicked on his night light. Then, tucked him into bed, smiling as he wiggled around to get comfortable.
    âDo you think we can get ice cream with Logan and Wade one day?â Arlo asked hopefully.
    âWeâll see, sweetie,â you chuckled, leaning down to press a kiss to his forehead.
    âGoodnight, mama,â he smiled softly at you, âI love you.â
    âNight, bud. I love you,â you replied, standing from the bed and heading for the door. âSleep tight,â you added, flicking the lightswitch and leaving his room, pulling the door closed as you did.
    Now that he was in bed, you made your way back to the living room.
    âHeâs in bed,â you spoke as you entered the room. âHeâll be out in a few minutes. That kid can fall asleep anywhere,â you chuckled softly, plopping down on the couch next to Logan. You left a little bit of space between the two of you, not wanting to make things weird.
    âIt must be nice,â Logan joked, an amused breath leaving his nose.
    âOne time I found him asleep halfway through using the bathroom. He had his head leaned over against the toilet paper roll,â you laughed at the memory.
    âJesus,â Logan laughed along with you. âHe must keep you on your toes.â
    âYou have no idea,â you chuckled, pulling one leg up onto the couch so you could face Logan as you talked. âHeâs got enough energy for about a dozen kids. But when heâs out, he sleeps like the dead.â
    âHe definitely has the energy,â Logan agreed. âBut he seems like a good kid.â
    âHe is,â you smiled proudly. âHeâs a great kid. One of the sweetest kids I know. Maybe I just think that because Iâm biased,â you joked.
    âI donât think so,â Logan smiled. âHeâs sweet. When he and I were playing earlier while you cooked, he was always offering to share whatever toy he had. Not a lot of kids are offering to share things.â
    âI try my best with him. I wasnât sure if I was ready to be a mom, but then Arlo came along, and I dunno, it was just, it was right,â you spoke fondly.
    âIt canât be easy being a single mother,â Logan started, âYouâre doinâ great. Heâs lucky to have you.â
    âThank you,â you said softly. Nobody had ever told you anything like that before. You werenât really sure how to react. âI hadnât really expected to be a single mom, but I donât have any regrets. I adopted him when he was just a baby, but thatâs a story for another time.â
    âI didnât realize,â Logan replied. âHeâs even luckier to have you than I thought, then.â
    You smiled at Logan, feeling so grateful that the mishap at the supermarket had happened. You enjoyed having him around.
=================
    âTonight was nice,â you told Logan as you walked him to the door. It was getting late, and you had to be up the next morning.
    Logan put his shoes on while you opened the door.
    âI had a good time,â Logan smiled slightly at you as he stood.
    You both stepped into the hallway, and you pulled the door most of the way around behind you.
    âThank you again, for yesterday,â you hummed, leaning against the wall next to your door.
    âNo, thank you,â he replied, âFor dinner. Itâs not often I get a home cooked meal.â
    âWell, feel free to come by for more anytime,â you smiled up at him, âEven if itâs just chicken nuggets and mac n cheese, youâre more than welcome to join us.â
    Logan chuckled softly, nodding at your invitation.
    âIâd say that you two are welcome to drop by Wade and Iâs place, but that is not fit for children,â he joked.
    You laughed, unable to help yourself. Joking with Logan felt so natural.
    âWell,â Logan spoke again. âI should get out of your hair, but Iâll see ya around, yeah?â He tried not to sound too hopeful.
    âYeah, Iâll see you around,â you nodded in response.
     Logan hesitated for a fraction of a second before leaning in and placing a barely there kiss on your cheek.
    âIâd really like to see you again sometime. As a date,â he admitted. âI understand that dating is more difficult when you have a kid because you have to consider Arlo when you make decisions, but Iâd like to see where this goes.â He couldnât remember the last time heâd asked someone else, and all he could do was pray he wasnât making a fool of himself.
    âI would love that, Logan,â you grinned. He was the first man to ever consider Arlo when it came to dating you. He seemed like the type of man to know that you had to put Arlo first. âArlo is having a sleepover at my sisterâs with his cousins this weekend. Maybe we could get dinner then? Just the two of us this time.â
    âThat sounds great,â Logan nodded, trying and failing to fight off a smile. He felt like a goddamn blushing school boy. âIâll come by at seven so we can go to dinner.â
    âPerfect,â you smiled. You leaned up, placing a quick peck on his lips. âI canât wait.â
    Logan was shocked that youâd kissed him, but he certainly wasnât complaining. He opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted by a voice from inside your apartment.
    âMama?â Arlo called out for you from his room. He mustâve had a nightmare or want a glass of water.
    âDuty calls,â you joked. âGoodnight Logan,â you hummed, stepping back into your apartment.
    âNight,â he replied, giving you a small nod as you shut the apartment door to go check on Arlo.
    After the door was shut, Logan realized he was smiling like an absolute idiot. He hadnât been this excited for a date sinceâŠ. He couldnât actually remember.
    Turning on his heel, he headed down the hallway back to Wadeâs. He couldnât stop smiling.
    Walking into the apartment, he groaned as he saw Wade laying on the couch as if he had been waiting for Logan to get back.
    âStop looking at me like that,â he huffed, shutting the door behind him.
    âLike what, peanut?â Wade shrugged. âI just wanna know how things went with the hot milf down the hall.â
    âFuck off,â Logan rolled his eyes, dropping his keys on the entry table and walking off to go to bed.
    âIâll take that as âIt went great, Wade, you officially have a nephew nowâ. Is that about right?â He called after Logan.
    Logan ignored Wade, shaking his head. He had to admit, though, things had gone great with the hot milf down the hall. And it would only get better.
#logan howlett#fanfic#fanfiction#hugh jackman#james logan howlett#logan wolverine#xmen#wolverine fanfiction#wolverine#x reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x fem!reader
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Iâm sobbing this is so fucking cute
You're Bleeding
I'm lowkey picturing Origins Logan for this, but honestly it's not super specific so you can imagine any era. Also yes I'm on my period, it's a bitch.

Pairing:Â Logan Howlett x Reader
Tropes: Comfort
Warnings: Reader has a period/period cramps, mentions of blood, reader is mentioned as a woman
Other tags: Reader is mentioned to be a mutant, but nothing is specified
Background: You and Logan have been dating for a short amount of time.Â
Description: When you happen to get your period the day of your date night with Logan, you feel horrible and youâre forced to cancel. Logan shows you that he cares more than you knew.
    âHey, honey,â Loganâs voice rang through your ears as he picked up the phone.
    âHey, Lo,â you replied. You felt bad for having to call and cancel date night, but your cramps had been killing you since youâd woken up in a small puddle of your own blood. There was no way that you could go out somewhere, not tonight. âIâm really sorry, but Iâve gotta ask for a rain check on dinner tonight.â
    âEverything alright?â He replied. He was less worried about a canceled date night, more concerned with if you were okay.
    âYeah, no big deal, I just havenât felt good today,â you answered. You werenât totally lying, you just didnât explain the reason you werenât feeling good. âI think I just need to stay in tonight and sleep.â
    âWell, call me if you need something,â he said.
    âI will,â you assured, a small smile on your face. He really was a very sweet man, when he wasnât brooding. âIâll call you tomorrow, hopefully we can go to dinner if I feel better.â
    âAlright, sweetheart,â he hummed through the phone. âIâll talk to you then.â
    Your smile shifted to a frown as you hung the phone up. Truthfully, you wanted nothing more than to see Logan. You felt like being wrapped up in his arms right now could make everything feel better. That being said, you werenât sure how Logan would react to you getting your period. Not every man was understanding about it.
    Making your way back to your couch, where youâd spent the majority of your day, you grabbed your trusty heating pad and got comfortable on the soft cushions of the sofa. Once you got settled and adjusted the heating pad so it was just right, you snatched your favorite blanket from the back of your couch.
    After a few minutes, you were just about as comfortable as you were going to get. Not that anything felt very comfortable thanks to the throbbing pain in your lower back. Sighing at the thought, you grabbed the tv remote and flicked it on. You clicked through some different options before landing on a movie youâve seen a million times. It was comforting, and it was one of your favorites. Exactly what you needed in this moment.
    Youâd spent only a few minutes watching the movie when there was a knock at the door. Great, now you had to leave your little nest on the couch to answer the knocking.
    With a huff, you threw the covers from your body, along with the heating pad, and stood. The walk to the door felt like an entire trek in your current state. Once you reached the door, you peaked out the little hole, only to see Logan taking up your entire vision.
    You were confused as to why he was at your door, but still, it made you smile just to see him after the day youâd had. Opening the door, you leaned against it lightly.
    âWhat did I do to deserve you showing up on my doorstep?â You asked, smiling softly at him.
    âYou sounded different on the phone,â he started. âSo I thought Iâd come check on you.â
    God, he was so nice. It was hard to believe that youâd managed to find the perfect boyfriend, but here he was, at your door. He was being so sweet, and he looked good while doing it. It was absolutely ridiculous, and you loved every second.
    âWell since youâre here, why donât you come in?â You offered, stepping aside.
    He stepped into your home, giving you a quick peck as he passed. Once the door was closed, he gently grabbed your shoulders and started looking over you as if giving you some sort of inspection.
    âYou alright?â You asked, chuckling softly. âOr are you just giving me a check up for fun?â
    âWhereâre you hurt?â He asked, his brows drawn together as he held onto your shoulders, now keeping you facing him.
    âHurt?â You questioned, confusion clear on your face. âIâm not hurt, Lo, Iâm just not feeling good,â you explained. Moving his hands from your shoulders gently, you leaned up to peck his lips. âPromise, Iâm okay.â
    âHoney, I know youâre lying,â he shook his head. âJust tell me the truth. I can smell the blood on you. Your blood. So what happened?â
    âOh,â you mumbled. You could feel your cheeks getting warm. He could smell your blood. Struggles of dating a fellow mutant, you guessed. You were positive that youâd never been so embarrassed before.
    âDid someone do something?â He asked, his fists clenching at his sides.
    âNo, Logan, nobody did anything,â you sighed. âIâll explain the blood smell if you promise not to be weird about it or something.â
    âNot be weird?â He questioned, but nodded. âI wonât be weird about it, whatever it is.â
    âItâs because itâs that time of the month,â you finally admitted. âThatâs why I canceled dinner tonight. Iâve felt like shit all day, and I didnât feel up to going out.â
    You watched Loganâs face as things seemed to click for him.
    âI guess I shouldâve thought about that before interrogating you about smelling like blood,â he replied, scratching the side of his neck. He seemed to think for another moment before speaking again. âWhy wouldnât you just tell me that, honey?â He asked. His voice was soft, and it made you feel almost bad for not just telling him to begin with.
    âDidnât know how you reacted,â you answered with a shrug. âSome men are weird, or find it gross. Or they just make it awkward. We just havenât been dating too long, and I didnât know what youâd think.â
    âSweetheart,â Logan chuckled, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and pulling you into his chest. âI started dating you knowing that youâre a woman. I knew youâd have periods,â he hummed, looking down at you. âAnyone who gets grossed out isnât a man, thatâs a boy, and heâs an idiot.â
    Your arms wrapped around his middle as you rested your chin on his chest to return his gaze.
    âIf you wouldâve told me, I wouldâve just offered to bring takeout and snacks. We could just have a night in instead of going out to dinner,â he explained. âI donât care where date night is,â he added. âI just wanted to spend time with my girl.â
    âOh fuck off,â you sniffed, your eyes beginning to tear up. Stupid hormones. âThatâs so nice,â you said softly, turning your head to hide in his chest.
    Loganâs arms tightened around you and he gently swayed the two of you. He knew that you were only this emotional due to the imbalance in your body, and he was there to comfort you through that.
    âSince youâre here,â you began quietly, lifting your head. You were sure that your eyes were rimmed with red now, but you didnât really care. âWill you stay?â
    âYou think Iâm gonna leave you here in pain and crying?â He replied, leaning down to press a soft kiss to your lips. âTry again, honey,â he smiled.
    âI was just watching a movie in the living room,â you smiled softly at him. âWanna join me?â
    âLet me go change into something comfortable, and then weâll watch as many movies as you want,â he nodded. âGo get comfy, Iâll be there in a few,â he hummed. He reluctantly let go of you to toe off his shoes and walk off towards your bedroom.
    You made your way back into the living room, letting out a content sigh as you plopped onto the couch. Having Logan as yours was truly a blessing. You were convinced you were the luckiest fucker out there.
    Just as he said, Logan walked into your living room after a few minutes. He was wearing some plaid pajama pants and a tank that heâd left at your place for any impromptu sleepovers, like tonight.
    Logan sat next to you, putting an arm around your shoulders and planting a kiss against your temple.
    âYou need anything before we start watching?â He asked, kissing your cheek a few times.
    âJust you,â you replied. It was cheesy, sure, but it was true.
    âReal cute,â he teased, planting one more kiss to the side of your head before getting comfortable himself, relaxing into the couch.
    You just smiled, grabbing the remote and starting the movie over. As the two of you watched the beginning of the movie, you were adjusting and squirming, trying to get comfortable. Logan, ever observant, noticed.
    âYou alright?â He hummed, giving your shoulders a squeeze.
    âJust canât get comfortable,â you admitted with a frown. âMy back is fucking killing me. Why can't my mutation be always being comfy?" You huffed.
    âCâmere,â Logan replied, guiding you into his lap. He adjusted you until you were straddling his lap facing him.
    âYou donât mind me sitting on your lap? Since, yâknow,â you trailed off, nodding downward.
    âDo you realize how much blood Iâve had on my hands?â He raised a brow, amused. âI donât give a shit, honey. Just relax,â he said softly.
    You couldnât help but chuckle softly as you let him guide you to lean against his chest. Your head laid on his shoulder and you closed your eyes.
    âIâve got you,â he hummed out, his hands sliding to rest on your lower back. He started gently rubbing your back. His hands felt so warm and so big against your back. You were positive nothing felt this good.
    The two of you stayed silent, the only noise was the movie playing on your tv. Loganâs hands didnât stop rubbing and gently kneading at your lower back.
    You were nearly asleep when you decided to speak again.
     âThank you,â your voice was slurred with sleepiness, and the fact that your cheek was smooshed against his shoulder didnât help.
    âIs this helping?â He asked, but you could nearly hear the smile on his lips. He knew you were on the verge of sleep, and he was happy that he could help you get comfortable.
    âMhm,â you nodded your head against him. âBut I meant for coming over. You beinâ here makes it better.â
    âIâll be here anytime you need me,â he assured quietly. âGo to sleep, honey. Iâll carry you to bed.â
    âI love you, Logan,â you hummed. You were sleepy, sure, but you had to tell him how you felt. Youâd been wanting to tell him for a little while, and at this moment, you couldnât keep it to yourself any longer. It was soon, but youâd never been more sure about anything.
    âI love you too,â he replied, kissing your head gently. âIâll take care of you as long as youâll let me,â he added, his voice low and rumbling through his chest.
    âYouâll never get rid of me,â you mumbled, yawning softly.
    âGood,â he said quietly, giving you a small squeeze.
    The last thing you remember thinking before falling asleep was that next time, youâd call Logan with any problem, because you knew heâd be there. Heâd always be there, just for you.
#fanfic#fanfiction#logan howlett#james logan howlett#wolverine x reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett fic#logan howlett x reader#wolverine x you#logan howlett fluff
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Okay wait-
I need this LIKE LAST WEEKđ©đ©đ©
Crumbling Desperation
70s Logan X F! Reader
Logan wants you pliant for him
A/N: Based off some feral conversations between me and @cruel-as-sin today. DOFP has my heart and my pussy. Also this maybe a lil rough as I get back into fic writing after being sick for a week!
Warning: SMUT MDNI, mean! Logan, rough sex, unprotected PiV, multi creampies, teasing, fingering, blowjob, very very rough, some light pussy and thigh smacking lol, a little degradation (but not super mean), taunting, begging, uuuuuuh this is just a nasty fic in general
The only light that filled the darkness of the apartment bedroom was the street lamps.
Light pouring through the windows. Shadowing two figures that were rocking softly in the dark.Â
Logan's arms kept you pressed against his body. His broad chest against you, his hips rocked with yours. He rested his chin atop your head, his hands resting on your hips, slowly brushing up and down your curves.Â
Your eyes closed, as you leaned into him. A faint smile on your face as you felt his hands squeeze you a little tighter. He tipped his head lazily, his lips brushing over your ear, along your jawline. You hummed happily, tipping your head back, giving him purchase to kiss your neck.Â
His arm wrapped around your waist, his other hand sliding up, gently cupping one of your breasts, before tracing along the collar of your dress, his fingers tucking underneath the sleeve and pulling it down your shoulder. He leaned down, pressing several kisses to your neck and shoulder. You exhaled softly, eyes fluttering open as Logan sucked and nipped at your skin.
âYou looked good tonight baby.â He hums, his lips brushing over your jawline. âLuckiest guy in the world to have a pretty girl like you by my side.â
You giggle, biting your lip as his hand continues brushing over your curves. âIâm the lucky one.âÂ
âMmm.â His hand brushed down your body, finding the slit of your dress that exposed your thighs. His hand dipped underneath the satin cloth, brushing over the lace panties you put on for him. âFeeling needy darling?âÂ
âMhm.â You nodded, a subtle movement of your hips into his touch. âYou were playing with me all night Lo.â Your hand stretched up, curling into his hair. âI need you.âÂ
âYou got me.â He says with a lighthearted tone- but the way he touched you, told you had had ulterior motives. His hand moving to tracing along your inner thigh instead, not touching you where you really needed him. Your bodies still rocking back and forth together.
âI need more.â You brought your other hand to where he was touching your thighs, grabbing his wrist to move him towards your needy cunt.Â
You were soaked, and it was almost painful how badly you needed his touch. He kept messing with you all night. Stroking your thighs, cupping your ass everywhere you walked, his fingers tracing up and down your arm. Heâd lean in and press kisses to the back of your neck and ear- his breath hot on your skin and sending you goosebumps. He kept teasing you, working you up so much you asked him multiple times to take you home, or even go into the bathroom just for him to give you some relief.Â
Then heâd give you that cocky smile, and ask you what the rush was for. He was enjoying the night out, he didnât want to go home yet.Â
âMore?â He asks, not doing anything to stimulate you, only allowing you to move his hand as you attempt to get stimulation from him. He suddenly ripped it away from you, turning you around and shoving you onto the bed. You gasped, shuffling to push yourself up.
He walked over, shoving your legs open and pushing himself between them. âMore what?â
âLoâŠâ You whined, a small pout of your lip. âI want more of you.âÂ
He raised a brow. âIâm right here sweetheart. All of me.â He shrugged. He brought his hands down over your hips, adjusting you on the bed, pulling your closer to him- so the tent in his pants pressed teasingly against your panties. âYouâre gonna have to be more specific.â
Heat bloomed in your face as you considered what he was implying.Â
âIâŠâ You stammered.Â
âWhat? Cat got your tongue now?â He leaned down over you. âCanât talk? You were quick to ask me to take care of you earlier when we were having a good time. â His tone became annoyed.
âLogan-â You pouted. He slid a hand over your belly, the valley of your breasts, coming over to squeeze your neck. He tipped his chin up, looking down at you with an unamused expression.Â
âWhat do you want?â He asks.Â
âIâŠI want you to touch me. To take off my dress.â You reply, your voice barely a whisper. He smirked, leaning forward to press a kiss to your nose before he brought his hands to the collar of your dress.
You gasped as he ripped it apart from the middle. The tear sounded through the room.Â
I actually liked that dressâŠ.
You thought to yourself but didnât voice it. That would only mean heâd stop playing with you.
Logan's hand came up to cup your breasts, his thumbs rubbing circles over your peaked nipples. You arched your back, lifting towards his touch, his calloused thumb stimulating your breasts and creating a warm honey feeling that pooled in your lacey lingerie.Â
A soft moan escaped you, your eyes fluttering shut.Â
âEnjoying yourself?â He asks, amused by your reaction. You tipped your head to the side.Â
âGetting off just from me playing with your tits?âÂ
âMmâŠâ You nodded, your hands gripping the sheets. He leaned down, swirling his tongue over a nipple and you gasped. âOh-â You bit your bottom lip. His tongue continued playing with your peaked buds, as he nipped and sucked on your tits. âLogan- I need you- down there.â You gasped.
He parted from your nipple with a pop. âDown where sweetheart? Australia?â
You couldnât help but giggle, shaking your head. He grinned, pressing a kiss to the valley of your breasts, but then bit at your skin and you yelped. He chuckled.Â
âThat hurt?â He asks, you shake your head, and lowers himself down to your belly, biting you again, making you flinch. âKnock it off.â He says with fake annoyance, pressing kisses over your belly, before biting the fat of your hip, once again making you jump. He sat up harshly, scowling down at you. âWhat did I say?â
âSorry I-âÂ
He delivered a smack to your thigh, making you yelp. âYou want me to make you feel good sweetheart?â
You nodded, pressing your lips together.Â
âThen stop fucking moving.â He growls. You sighed in frustration, wanting to wiggle and get him to move on with it- he was going purposely slow, doing everything he could to avoid giving you what you wanted from him. The same thing heâd been doing all night.
âCan you just⊠Touch me?â You ask desperately. He raised a brow.
âTouch you?â He says. âWhatâs the magic word?âÂ
Your eyes filled with tears. âPlease, Logan, please touch me!âÂ
His eyes turned dark, a quirk of his lips as he leaned down over you. His hand swiped up over your panties, making your legs twitch from his touch, he slid his back down underneath your panties. âTouch you?â He tilts his head, a click of his tongue. âHow? Like this?âÂ
His fingers found your swollen clit, and he flicked it with two fingers. You gasped, nodding. He smirked, flicking it again. You tilted your head to the side, spreading your legs farther open. Other than flicking occasionally though, he didnât touch you, didnât stroke or rub circles.Â
âI need moreâŠâ You whined, lifting your hips up to him. He chuckled. He pulled his hand away.Â
âCanât do much with this thing in the way.â He mumbles, pointing to the panties before glancing back up at you. Then he delivers a smack to your cunt. You yelped, tears stinging your eyes. âTake em off.â He orders.Â
You took a deep breath, sitting up, pulling off the rest of your torn dress, he stepped back from you. Watching as you slid off your panties, pushing them past your ankles. He walked back over- snatching them from your hand- stuffing them into his back pocket.Â
You leaned back onto the bed, spreading your legs open again, giving him a view of your weeping pussy, soaked, and swollen from no relief. He smirked.
âYou opened your legs for me without even asking. Good girl.â He mumbles stepping forward. âYou that desperate?â
âMhm.â You nodded, pouting. âCan you touch me again?âÂ
His hand came down, brushing over your folds, and you could barely feel him. You whined, lifting your hips up again. He pressed one finger against your burd. âHow about that?â He asks.
You shook your head, so he removed it- making you nod desperately. âNo- Keep it there!â You looked up at him begging. âJust move! Please?â
He placed his finger over your bud again, slowly swirling your clit in circles. It provided relief- but not enough. Your entire cunt felt like it was throbbing, your hole clenching over nothing over and over again.Â
âAnother-â You begged. âMore?âÂ
He added another finger, still rubbing you slowly, becoming torturous as your pussy leaked arousal, begging to be stimulated.Â
âLogan-â
He smacked your cunt, making you yelp.
âLogan-â He mocked your voice. âYouâre so whiny.â He taunts. Your lip quivered as frustration bubbled in you, a tightness in your chest for some relief in your body. Logan was playing with you, and he was drawing it out as long as possible. What his game was with you, you didnât know- but you could barely take it anymore.Â
He stepped back from you and you let out a small sob. âQuiet down.â He orders, and you opened your eyes to see him unbuttoning his shirt, staring down at you with that cocky smile. You tipped your head back and sighed, your hands gripping the sheets so tight you thought they would rip.
His clothes were abandoned to the floor and you looked back up at him.
The sight of him could have made you cum right then.
He towered over you. You admired his broad frame, the veins that popped out through his arms and belly. The tone muscles of his abs, his biceps, and his thighs. Your eyes landed on his thick girth, erected, with a red swollen tip and pre-cum beading out of his slip.Â
At least Iâm not the only one feeling this wayâŠ
You bit your lip, looking up at him with a pleading look in your eyes. He smirked, walking over to you, his cock bouncing with every step making you part your lips as you watched it. You thought heâd climb between your legs- give you the relief you so badly needed, and fuck you within an inch of your life.Â
Instead he pushed your legs shut, reaching over to grab your arm and pull you up, pulling you to the ground on your knees.Â
âYou think youâre the only one needing some relief sweetheart?â He looks down at you, his hand coming up to cup your jaw. You swallowed. âOpen up.âÂ
You obliged, and he slipped his tip between your lips. You moaned at his heady taste, dripping onto your tongue. His hand slipped from your jaw into your hair- a tight grip on it, as he pulled you farther down over him.Â
A small gag escaped you and you heard him chuckle. âCanât take it? Too much for you baby?â
You moaned, and he pushed himself farther down your throat, choking you. Tears finally broke through, rolling down your cheek. He looked down at you, arrogance across his face.Â
âCrybaby.âÂ
He smirks, and you shut your eyes. Your hand slipping down between your legs, attempting to give yourself much-needed relief as his cock filled your mouth.Â
âUh uh-â He kicked your hand away, his cock choking your further. âNo touching. You take care of me first, sweetheart.âÂ
A small sob escaped you, but you kept your hands off yourself, bringing them up to his thighs. You looked back up at him, pleading eyes for him to hurry up and use you, so that heâll finally give you your reward. The throbbing between your legs was begging for your attention, and you couldnât ignore it even with Logan choking you with his cock.Â
His hand curled in your hair kept you in place, as he began slowly thrusting in and out of your mouth. Spit and drool rolled down your chin, and his cock reached the back of your throat over and over- so much your gag relax disappeared, becoming used to his intrusion.Â
He tipped his head back, a moan escaping him as he thrusts faster.Â
âFuck, you got a sweet mouth baby.â He moaned. He looked down at you, mouth parted, his ears and cheeks flushed. âYou like this?â
You closed your eyes, nodding as best as you could as he face-fucked you. He let out a weak chuckle. He brought his other hand into your hair, holding you tight as he went faster. Tears continued streaming down your face. Logan's jaw tightened, pushing your head onto his cock, bending over as he came to his finish- his cum shooting down your throat, filling your mouth. He planted his face into the mattress behind you, grunting and groaning like an animal as he rode out his seemingly neverending coitus.Â
He straightened back up, pulling out of you and stepping back. You gasped, panting for air as his cum, your spit, and your tears stained your face. He reached down cupping your jaw, making you look up at him- with your dazed eyes.Â
âYou look real pretty like this.â He taunts, his thumb catching a dribble of cum, sticking it back onto your tongue. You wrapped your lips around him, sucking on it and closing your eyes- as if you hadnât gotten enough of him already. âCâmon. Up.â He ordered pulling his thumb from your lips, before he became hypnotized by you.
You stood up and he shoved you onto the bed, spreading your thighs. âThink you deserve this?â He asks, lowering his face over your pussy, noting how soaked your thighs were now.Â
âI-â Your voice was raspy, âI donât know.âÂ
He hummed. âMaybe you donât then-âÂ
âWait wait! Yes, I do, I deserve this.â You whimpered, your hands reaching out to cup his face. âPlease Logan-âÂ
He smiled, lowering back down. He took a deep inhale, his eyes nearly rolling back as he let out a groan. âGod you smell fucking incredibleâŠâ
His hands came up, spreading your folds open, examining your cunt, his thumb brushing over your pussy teasingly, making your thighs tremble. You were so worked up, that any stimulation felt like too much. You whined, shaking your head as another sob broke through you.Â
âQuiet it down.â He says. âI got mine sweetheart, we can do this all fucking night.âÂ
You bit your lip, tears streaming down as he continued messing with you, but never fully giving in to your pleasure. Your body trembled, his touch, his breath blowing over you.Â
You gave in, body relaxing, shutting your eyes as your breathing calmed.Â
Logan looked up at your now weak and pliant figure. He grinned.Â
âThere we go.â He cooed, standing up as he climbed between your legs. He pressed his lips to yours, savoring the taste of himself on you. âGood girl.â He purred, pressing more kisses along your jawline. You opened your eyes, looking up at him dreamily.Â
He pushed his cock through your folds, hard again already. A small breath escaped you as your eyes rolled back. He rutted gently into you, leaning down to capture your lips again. You kissed him back weakly.Â
âYou still want me sweetheart?â He mumbles against your lips. âOr are you too tired now?â
You nodded.Â
âUse your words. Too tired?â He grinned lifting himself off of you.
âNo- No I want you.â You spoke up, your hands reaching to grab his shoulders and pull him back down. âPlease.â
âMm.â He angled himself at your clenching hole, pushing his tip inside. Your mouth flew open, head falling back. âDamn, just slid right in darling.â He groaned, nuzzling his face into your neck. âReal needy arenât ya?â
You nodded, your arms wrapping around his neck. He slowly pushed in and out of you, but never fully, only his tip.
âLoâŠâ You whined.Â
âWhat darling, arenât I giving you what you wanted?â
âI- YesâŠâ You nodded. âI want more.â
âGreedy, arenât you?âÂ
You let out a small cry. âPlease? Please baby?â You begged. âI want all of you.â
âI donât know sweetheart, seemed like all of me was too much for you earlier.â
âItâs not, it's not! I can take it, please, please, please!â You began to sob, turning your head to the side. You wrapped your legs around his waist so he couldnât pull out. He smirked, watching you beg for a moment.
Without warning he thrusts into you up to the hilt. You moaned, eyes shooting up to look up at him.Â
âWhat? You wanted it.â He grins. His hand braced against your headboard, his other arm wrapped around your waist. He began thrusting into you at an inhuman pace, his hips slamming into yours. Your eyes rolled back, your pliant body fitting into him as he shook the whole bed fucking into you.
He sat up and grabbed your hips with both hands slamming into you with a fury. He watched your tits bounce with every thrust, the way your greedy cunt sucked him in eagerly, soaking his cock with you creamy arousal. Your arms fell to either side of your head, melting into the mattress as Logan finally gave you your reward.
You lost track of time as he fucked you, pushing you into different positions, and making you cum over and over. You turned into a ragdoll that he used at will- and you loved it. Even in your semi-conscious state.Â
Your legs on his shoulders, pushed down to your chest as he buried himself balls-deep, spilling himself inside you for the second time, his cum overflowing around his cock and leaking out of you, ruining your sheets more than they already were.
He had you on your side, mouth hung open and eyes rolled back as he thrusts into and out, arm wrapped around your chest, a handful of your tit, his other hand supporting your thigh, the bedframe shaking and creaking- threatening to break underneath you both.Â
His hand buried into your hair, forcing your face into the mattress while he slammed into you from behind. Your ass up, your legs trembling while his, and your fluids mixed streamed down your thighs. Your throat is hoarse, and you stopped crying a long time ago- no more tears left to shed;
But there was much more pleasure to revel in.
#logan howlett#wolverine#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett fanfiction#wolverine x reader#logan howlett fic#logan howlett smut#wolverine smut
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I fear I need this man and this lifeâŠ
(I canât help but love older men)
nobody does it like you do
pairing: dbf!aaron hotchner/fem!reader rating: explicit w.c.: 10k.... a/n: dbf!hotch party ended months ago but im still here
summary:
You don't mean to start something with your dad's best friend during your summer break.
c.w.: 18+ MDNI PLSSSS, dbf!hotch yippee, no y/n, reader is mid-20s and hotch is mid 40s, reader is kind of a brat and also very sexual and forward :), car sex, handjobs in car, v fingering, dom/sub, dirty talk, light degradation kink, size kink if u squint, light choking at the end!, unprotected sex, tbh some plot to mostly porn
read below or on ao3 here <3
Youâre nearly half-naked when you first meet him.
It was the first morning back at home during your summer break in your first year of your Masterâs program. You hadnât been home in several months, blaming your rigorous coursework and the full-time job you had, but luckily you were able to use nearly a monthâs worth of PTO to coincide with your summer off.
You had gotten in late after flying across the country, but your body still woke up like clockwork just before 9 am.
Currently, as you make eye contact with the tallest and most attractive man you have ever met while wearing a tank top and shorts that barely covered your ass, you couldnât tell if that was a blessing or a curse.
You had heard your dad rave about what basically sounded like a crush he had over the phone for nearly a year. Aaron Hotchner apparently works with your father at the FBI, albeit in a different department, and they hit it off at a recent gala by discussing golf, expensive scotch, and being annoyed about the latest budget cuts. One Saturday at the country clubâs golf course later, your father was hooked, and Aaron has been over at the house nearly every weekend since.
You remember your dad saying something about how heâs hardworking, better than he is at golf, and much nicer than he looks. He didnât say anything about how hot he was. Â
You were stumbling out your bedroom and rubbing at your eyes when you had nearly run into him on the way to the bathroom. Youâre still waking up, but you see the genuine surprise and something like want on his face before itâs gone, a neutral expression taking over his handsome features. The clench in his jaw betrays him.
âExcuse me,â he says. His voice is low, deep in a way that sends a shiver down your spine. âI was just heading into the restroom.â
You blink at him, your mind still not having not caught up yet. âUhm.â
âI can just go to the one downstairs,â he says, giving you an easy smile. It makes him look even more devastatingly attractive and you feel dazed. With that, he turns on his heel and makes his way back downstairs without another word.
You distantly hear your father downstairs calling your name and asking if youâre awake. You feel rooted to the spot, flustered.
You try your best to go through your normal bathroom routine, but your heart still hasnât calmed down yet. Itâs been a while since youâve dated and even longer since youâve slept with someone, thus youâve had a lot of quality time with yourself recently, so seeing the way this older man reacted to you was enough to have you preening a bit. You werenât imagining it, right?
You tell yourself that youâre feeling lazy after a long day of traveling and not wanting to change yet as you head downstairs into the kitchen, absolutely not hiking your shorts up a little and shimmying your tank top down.
âGood morning,â you chirp as you step into the kitchen. Your dad is already sitting at the dining table, most likely finishing his second cup of coffee, and his face lights up when he sees you as if he wasnât the one to pick you up from the airport late last night. Aaron is standing in the kitchen next to the coffee machine, pouring into a travel mug.
You ignore the way you can feel Aaronâs dark eyes rove over you; the top of your breasts nearly threatening to spill out, your hard nipples poking through your top, and the curve of your ass peeking out from underneath your shorts.
âMorning, pumpkin,â your dad says cheerily, clearly oblivious to whatâs going on between his friend and his own daughter. âThis is Aaron, he works at the Bureau with me, I told you about him?â
You vaguely remember when you stalked through his Facebook profile several months ago after your father was tagged with him multiple times. The pictures of him were always blurry, never giving you anything to go off of.
As you stand next to him in the kitchen and crane your neck up to look at him, you realize the pictures really donât do him justice. Heâs handsome, almost boy-ish with the way his hair is clean and not gelled down like in the pictures, flopping in front of his forehead. Heâs wearing a tight red polo, showcasing his broad shoulders and forearms in a way that makes you want to drool a bit. His brow is pinched, jaw tense, and you almost think you can hear his teeth grinding when he attempts to keep his eyes on your face and not on your chest.
âNice to meet you, Mr. Hotchner,â you say, giving him an innocent smile. You ignore the mug your dad must have left on the counter for you and stand up on your tiptoes to retrieve one from the overhead cupboard.
You feel a rush of exhilaration when you hear Aaron suck in a breath at the way your tank top hikes up your stomach. When you turn back to him, because he is technically in the way of the coffee machine, you catch the way his eyes sharpen and the way his hand grasps at the edge of the counter, knuckles turning white.
And then itâs gone, just like earlier, replaced with something almost professional, probably the same expression he makes when something ticks him off at work.
Interesting.
âAaron is fine,â he says, stepping out of the way of the coffee machine and then holds his hand out for you to shake.
You can feel your dad watching you, so you make an effort to tone it down a bit. You put your hand in his, swallowing when you notice just how large his hands are and the way he grips you a bit tighter than what would be considered professional. When you look back up at him, thereâs something almost like a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.
âNice to meet you, Aaron,â you repeat. Itâs worth it to see a smile grace his face, replacing that smirk, and causing something fuzzy settle in your chest.
When he lets go and makes his way to sit across your dad at the table, you ignore how your hand suddenly feels like itâs burning.
âWeâre about to head to the golf course here in a couple of minutes if you wanted to join?â your dad asks as you pour your coffee and sit down at the head of the table.
You hum and experimentally kick your feet out in Aaronâs direction to where he sits to your left. You make contact with his knee, and you watch almost gleefully as Aaron just barely jumps in his seat. He doesnât make eye contact with you, just quietly sips at his coffee. It really shouldnât turn you on the way it does. âIâm okay, I was just planning on hanging out here and catch up on my shows.â
âYou sure, pumpkin? I know itâs been a while since you were out on the course butâŠâ
âI think thatâs exactly why I shouldnât come with you,â you laugh. You pull your chair up closer to the table, making it look like you were just trying to get comfortable, when really you just wanted to cop more of a feel of Aaronâs thighs.
âAlright, alright,â your father says, putting his hands up in defeat. âBut donât forget about the retreat later this week with the guys.â
You pause from where you were just about to dig your toes underneath his thigh. âRetreat?â
âI told you about it when I picked you up last night!â
âI think you forgot that you picked me up at one in the morning and I was half-asleep in the car,â you roll your eyes. âBut of course Iâll go with you.â
âGreat!â Your dad says with that big smile on his face that always makes you feel nostalgic. You donât really want to go, was honestly just planning on relaxing at home, but if it makes your dad happy and you get to spend more time with him, then youâll do almost anything.
And if Aaronâs coming too, then wellâŠ
Your dad gets up to put his mug in the sink and starts making his way out of the dining room. âYou ready to go, Hotchner?â
âAs ready as Iâll ever be,â Aaron says, a barely detectable rasp to his voice that has you hiding a smile in your mug.
Youâre about to put your foot down when you feel thick fingers circling your ankle and lifting your leg up until your ankle is resting on Aaronâs knee. You nearly squeak in surprise, but the look on Aaronâs face stops you.
He would look calm, composed even, if you didnât pay attention to the way his eyes have darkened. His brow is pinched, lips pressed into a thin line, as he tightens his grip on your ankle and asks in a low voice âWhat kind of game are you playing here?â
Not expecting confrontation, you donât know what to say. Your breath gets stuck in your chest, something about the glare heâs giving you keeps you rooted in your chair.
Because thereâs really only two options here. Heâs your dadâs best friend, at least 20 years older than you, and you really have no business in sexually riling up this guy youâve never met before until today. You can apologize, give him a genuine and friendly smile, and go back to your room and pretend this never happened and you werenât just throwing yourself at some hot older man.
But thereâs something about Aaron that you canât quite put your finger on. You wonder what it would be like to see him without those walls he undoubtedly keeps up all the time, see him come undone. You can tell from his Facebook pictures that heâs a bigshot of some kind, always wearing a fitted suit and not a hair out of place. You can see that now, in his pressed polo and matching belt, that he likes control, his skin nearly thrumming with it. And thatâs something youâve always enjoyed playing with.
You noticed the lack of a wedding ring on his finger, and the way heâs gazing into you now. The hot trail his hand leaves behind as he starts running up your shin, past your knee, and grip at the meat of your thigh says all you need to know.
âWhat game?â you say, innocently. You even play it up a bit by batting your lashes at him.
His grip on your thigh tightens, and it feels so good, and itâs been so long, you resist rolling your eyes back and instead spread your legs just a bit underneath the table.
âYour father didnât tell me you were such a brat,â he mutters.
âWhat he doesnât know wonât kill him,â you say, hoping you donât sound as out of breath as you feel.
Aaron doesnât say anything at that, just hums thoughtfully. You donât have a chance to backpedal, redirect the conversation if you were reading the whole situation wrong, before heâs placing your leg back on the floor with a gentle hand on your ankle and getting up.
âWe can talk more about what you want to do after school later,â he says, raising his voice a bit in an effort to appear like he wasnât just groping you underneath the table.
You almost donât hear what he says because your gaze is fixed on the obvious tent in his khakis. Your mouth nearly waters, and just knowing that youâre having the same kind of effect on him as he has on you has heat pooling between your thighs.
You shake your head, resisting the thoughts of throwing yourself on your knees in front of him and taking him in your mouth right in the dining room. You grin up at him and, in an impulsive decision that youâre secretly proud of, you reach over to put a hand on his thigh, dangerously close to his crotch.
âAbsolutely, Mr. Hotchner.â
Your smile grows wider at the stormy glare he gives you before he heads out of the dining room, imperceptibly adjusting himself in his pants. Your eyes follow him out, cheeks nearly starting to hurt from how hard youâre smiling because damn, does his ass look good.
Itâs your summer vacation, you may as well have some fun, right?
-
Since then, youâve barely seen Aaron.
You had made Aaron and your father sandwiches, knowing theyâd be home by the afternoon. You tried not to let the fact that you were upset, disappointed even, show on your face when your dad came home by himself and told you that Aaron got called for a case.
You knew from your dad that this was a normal occurrence for Aaron and that theyâve both gotten used to it. So many times there would be a gala or a party at the house and he would be called away to chase down a murderer or a rapist or a combination of the two.
You tried not to let it get to you, because seriously, you just met him, but also, itâs not like he owes you anything. But you really hoped that he wouldnât miss the retreat later that week. Just imagining spending time with him in your lone hotel room was enough to make you dizzy.
So, you distracted yourself. You caught up on your emails, watched those shows that had been piling up in your watch later list, and spent time with your dad at the golf course or whatever else he wanted to do that day. It was nice spending your summer vacation with your dad and catching up on what he does at his boring administrative job and the lack of both of your love lives.
By the time Friday rolled around, there was still nothing but radio silence from Aaron, at least you assumed since your dad hadnât mentioned him. You almost wish you had asked for his phone number before he left, but it wouldnât have done you any good to waste a whole week sitting by your cellphone, waiting for a probably dry text from some guy.
A really hot, older guy that definitely has control issues and could toss you around like a ragdoll.
Youâre throwing your bag in your carâs backseat and was about to admit defeat, that maybe he really wasnât going to make it, when a black Range Rover comes skidding down your street and into your driveway.
âThere he is,â your dad said in a sing-song voice, sounding about as giddy as you felt.
Your breath catches in your throat when you see him stepping out of his car, because how the hell is it possible for a man to look so attractive doing something so mundane?
And then your eyes nearly bug out because he has his suit jacket hanging from his arm, a duffel bag in the other, and is wearing a white dress shirt so tight that you could see the bulge of his biceps and the softness of his stomach.
âSorry Iâm late,â Aaron says, jogging up to where you and father were. âWe just got back a couple hours ago.â
He looks at you then with those pretty brown eyes, looking genuinely apologetic, and the disappointment that you were afraid was going to take a permanent place in your chest gently unravels.
âItâs no problem, Hotch,â your dad waves him off. âWeâre still waiting for some of the other guys, so you made it just in time.â
âGreat,â Aaron breathes in relief. âIâm going to go change then, Iâll be right back.â His eyes flit towards you again, and you wouldâve missed it if you werenât still staring at him. Theyâre piercing, undoubtedly beckoning you to follow him, and thereâs a hint of a smirk tugging at his mouth.
You feel a rush of excitement shooting through you as you watch him head towards the front door, eyes fixated on his hips. There was no clearer sign than that one, though you try not to roll your eyes fondly at the fact that your dad evidently did not notice as he goes back to playing Tetris with his bags in the trunk.
You wait a couple of minutes, pretending to play on your phone, and then exclaim âOops, I almost forgot my phone charger! Iâm going to run upstairs and get it.â
Your dad just gives an âOkie dokie, sweetie,â and then his phone rings with who you assume is one of his friends youâre waiting for.
You try to not sprint to the front door, instead taking a deep breath and walking in what you hope looks like a normal pace. However, as soon as the front door clicked shut, you run up the stairs, hoping Aaron chose your bathroom rather than the one downstairs.
Not spotting him waiting outside the bathroom, your heart nearly drops out from underneath you, however you notice the closed door and the soft golden light from underneath telling you that you were right.
You were right and maybe you werenât imagining things. He knew you would listen to his unspoken instructions and follow him. You werenât a profiler like him, not an expert at studying other peopleâs body language, but there was nothing fake about the fact that he got hard at your dining room table and you had only known each other for 10 minutes that Sunday.
The click of the door opening disrupts your thoughts. Youâre about to grin up at Aaron, say something cute like how youâve missed him or something more playful like asking why he hasnât called you.
But you donât get the chance because youâre suddenly being pressed up against the wall, warm hands on your hips, and Aaronâs soft mouth pressing into yours.
He swallows your gasp, his fingers inching up the hem of your tank top to touch the skin of your waist and kisses the life out of you. His lips are chapped and he tastes fresh, like he had a breath mint on the drive here, and the thought that he had that foresight just for you makes your knees weak.
He kisses you deeply, not even bothering to start gentle like so many other boys have tried before, and itâs overwhelming and not enough at the same time. Youâre helpless to kiss back, your body finally catching up, and your hands come up to tangle at the soft strands at the nape of his neck.
He hums against your lips at that, his hands starting to move underneath your shirt to trace the swell of your breasts through your bra. It tickles, and you squirm a little and huff a laugh against his mouth before you can help it.
Before you could apologize and tell him to stop tickling you, his hands press your hips harder against the wall and his lips break away from yours. You attempt to chase him, because you were definitely not done making out, when Aaron tuts at you.
âBehave,â he warns lowly, but he has a full-blown smirk now. His eyes are dark, pupils blown, and his lips red and glistening. He looks so unbearingly sexy when heâs reprimanding you, he just makes it so easy for you to tease him.
âOr what?â You ask, smiling up at him. You watch as his smirk falters, brows furrowing, and something like frustration and exasperation blooms on his face.
âYouâre ridiculous,â Aaron breathed, before heâs leaning in and pressing open-mouthed kisses along your jawline and down your neck. He scrapes his teeth against the spot where your shoulder and neck meets and your knees actually buckle this time, something like a strangled moan coming out of your mouth and catching you by surprise. âLooks like you do know how to watch that mouth of yours.â
Any snarky comeback you have dies in your throat because you did not expect Aaron to have that kind of dirty mouth on him. Molten heat starts to pool at the bottom of your stomach, between your thighs, as he slips the strap of your tank top down your shoulder to trace your collarbone with his lips.
âAaronâŠ,â you whisper, letting your hands fall from his nape to grab at his shoulders, trail down to grope at his biceps. The sleek muscle you can feel even through the fabric of his polo that he changed into, tensing and flexing as he pushes at you, sends your mind reeling.
âWhat is it, sweetheart?â he mutters against your shoulder, his warm breath and the pet name making you feel paralyzed. âCat got your tongue?â
Your eyes roll back as you feel him biting a mark onto your chest, right underneath your collarbone, the pain and pleasure tingling all the way down to your cunt. You say something unintelligible, brain feeling muddled, because holy shit.
âHey pumpkin, did your find your charger? We have to get moving!â You hear your dadâs voice from downstairs and barely swallow back a gasp before Aaronâs hand is pressed over your mouth to quiet you. You hate that that does absolutely nothing to help the growing arousal between your thighs.
Aaronâs eyes meet yours. His eyes have gotten impossibly darker, soft hair falling against his forehead. The wild desire and excitement are clear on his face, but he raises his eyebrows at you to signal you to behave before he lifts his palm off your face.
âComing!â you yell back at him, hoping the strain in your voice isnât as obvious to him as it is to you.
Aaron hums, something smug playing at his lips. âMaybe later.â
And itâs ridiculous. Aaron Hotchner, stoic Unit Chief of an FBI unit, best friend of your dad, and 20 years older than you just made out with you so hard that your knees buckled and made a joke about making you come?
You huff a laugh, pushing at his shoulder so you can wriggle out of his grip. He lets go immediately, stepping back to give you several feet of space, and you try not to think about how you already miss the heat and weight of his body against yours.
Youâre about to run downstairs, an excuse about realizing you already packed your charger on the tip of your tongue, when Aaron is circling his fingers around your wrist. You look back at him curiously, because as much as you want to, there definitely isnât time for him to ravage you in your bedroom.
He looks much more composed now, more like his professional SSA Aaron Hotchner self, but you catch the way his eyes linger on the way your shorts ride up high and the soft expanse of your thighs. âIâm serious. Weâll finish this later.â
And itâs the way he doesnât pose it as a question, but rather a guarantee. Like nothing is going to stop him from having his way with you.
The thought of being completely at Aaronâs mercy has you breathless, feeling a flush rise on your face and your pulse between your legs. He has you stunned speechless, because youâve never been with someone who has made you feel complete and utter want. You look at him now, chest imperceptibly heaving and making that olive green polo tug across the wide expanse of his chest, you realize that he may just ruin other people for you completely.
Your throat clicks when you clear it, and you only feel a little embarrassed when Aaron doesnât hide his smirk at you. All words have died in your throat, so you nod instead, hoping that he will take that as an answer.
If possible, Aaron looks even more smug at that.
âGood girl.â
-
The drive to the hotel where the retreat is being held is only 2 hours away, which wouldâve been perfectly easy, if you werenât stuck in the car with Aaron.
You were planning on driving your own car with the top down, wind in your hair, and music blasting. You wanted to spend at least part of your summer vacation doing girly summery things, such as driving into the night with your hair whipping your face and feeling the humidity making your tank top stick to your back.
You also thought you would have time to yourself to think about Aaron and what the hell you got yourself into.
Instead, because you canât tell if the universe loves or hates you, you have to take Aaronâs Range Rover because everyone elseâs cars are packed full, and your dad wouldnât let you drive by yourself. You tried not to show the excitement bloom on your face when your dad told you, but by the pointed look that Aaron gave you, you didnât do a very good job.
So, itâs just you, Aaron, and the incredibly tangible sexual tension between you.
The first 30 minutes was easy. It took a while for everyone to find the correct route and there was a lengthy discussion over the phone about whether anyone wanted to stop anywhere for any reason. Eventually, you and at least 4 other similarly lavish cars made it onto the highway.
Aaron was silent for most of the phone call, saying that he didnât have anywhere he wanted to stop at, and was just looking forward to the fancy clawfoot tub the hotel advertised on their website. You threw a glance at him at that, wondering if he was trying to tell you that he wanted to fuck in the bathtub, but nope. His eyes were firmly on the road, both arms on the steering wheel like a responsible adult or whatever.
You werenât sure how he was able to act like nothing happenedâlike you werenât about to let him just fuck you up against the wall in your childhood home, because currently, you felt like you were about to jump out of your skin from the nervous energy thrumming through you.
You fully ogle him now since itâs not like you have anything to hide. Even his side profile is attractive, but at this point youâre not surprised. Everything youâve been noticing about him has been steadily driving you wild; the sharp cut of his jaw, the faint traces of stubble, and the way his hands are gripping the steering wheel so tightly his knuckles are white.
You watch the bob of his Adamâs apple as he deadpans âYouâre staring.â
You grin at him before you could help it. âItâs not my fault youâre so handsome. They should study you in art classes, maybe you can even get naked for it?â
The snort that comes out of Aaronâs mouth is sudden, and by the way his eyebrows pinch together like heâs thinking hard, he notices as well. âYou really are insatiable.â
âYou say that like weâve even done anything yet,â you mutter, mostly to yourself, turning your head to the window to stare at the sun setting. It would be nighttime by the time you got to the hotel, but youâre already sleepy and debating taking a nap while Aaron drives.
You jump when you feel his hand on your thigh, large and warm. Youâve had other men put their hand on your thigh while they drive and itâs nice, maybe even comforting at times, but with Aaron, the action feels darker. It feels more possessive, heated, and just the sight of his huge hand squeezing the flesh of your thigh has you unconsciously squeezing your legs, trapping the tips of his fingers between them.
âCan you behave?â he wondered out loud. âBecause youâre not showing me that you can until we get to the hotel.â
The challenge is clear in the deep timbre of his voice, nearly condescending in a way that makes your breath quicken. You vaguely thought about what he had planned for you at the hotel, luckily you had a whole room to yourself since none of your dadâs friendsâ daughters wanted to come. You donât necessarily blame themâyou probably wouldnât have come either if it werenât for Aaron and the undoubtable promise that you will have the best sex of your life.
And you do want to wait, honestly. But right now, watching the way his biceps flex in the golden light and remembering the way he desperately grabbed at your hips has you rethinking.
So, you give him an innocent smile, reminiscent of the one you gave him earlier this week, and take a hold of his hand to intertwine your fingers together. The action is slightly risky, implying something about your relationship that neither have you discussed. You may be overthinking it, worried that Aaron would think youâre jumping to conclusions, but all of your reservations disappear when Aaronâs hand squeezes yours and brings your joined hands to rest in his lap.
He gives you a soft smile, one youâve never seen before that makes your chest tighten, and turns his gaze back on the road.
The following 10 minutes are quiet besides the soft roar of the engine and the gentle hum of the radio. The sun setting washes the interior of the car with a warm gold, and you canât help but notice the way both of your hands, still clasped together, just look so good together. Like you perfectly complemented each other.
You blame it on the fact that youâre starting to get bored when you wiggle your hand to free yourself from Aaronâs grasp to run your fingers along the top of his hands. You trace each knuckle before tracking the visible veins with a light touch, your fingers running up his wrist and to his forearm. The dusting of hair is soothing when you place a firmer hand onto his forearm, gripping it, and your heart thuds in your chest when you notice your thumb and middle finger canât even touch each other.
He's just so big. His arms, his hands, his shoulders. The way he can so easily overpower you, manhandle you, domineering in a way that makes you want to act out even more just to see what he would do.
He throws you a curious glance when your hand moves up to his bicep, squeezing and feeling.
âJust touching,â you say, and then Aaronâs eyes are back on the road.
The next thing you do is completely spontaneous, out of character for you even, however you know being impulsive is what got you here in the first place.
You place your hand on his crotch.
He doesnât jump because, of course not. If anything, he was expecting it by the way he just gives you another curious look. Your eyes are instantly drawn to the way his tongue flicks out to wet his lips and the sudden clenching of his jaw.
âStill just touching,â you repeat and turn your focus to your phone with your free hand, leaving your other hand in his lap.
You scroll mindlessly through several different apps for a couple minutes, not even reading anything because youâre too stunned with the fact that Aaron didnât say anything or remind you to be on your best behavior. Your hand is still precariously placed on his crotch, the seam of his jeans warm against the palm of your hand.
You start scrolling more intently now, reading the entirety of at least every other post, before you start tentatively rubbing your fingers on where you can definitely feel the head of his dick through his pants. Aaron inhales sharply, so quietly you almost donât hear it, and itâs all the permission you need.
You start pressing more firmly, grabbing him through his jeans to the best of your ability and tracing the line of his slowly hardening cock through the rough material. You grope at him, nearly shamelessly now, and it takes all of your willpower to not throw your phone to the backseat and jump into his lap.
Instead, you place your phone at your feet and turn your body towards him. His back is ramrod straight and his hands are grasping at the steering wheel like his life depends on it. If anyone passing by looked through the window, they would just assume that Aaron was one of those extremely attentive drivers. However, up close, you can see the tense line of his jaw, the way his brows are pinched together, and the way heâs attempting to hide the way heâs starting to breathe heavily through slightly parted lips.
It's intoxicating, and you want more.
Your hand begins to move up his zipper to the top button of his jeans. His eyes dart to you then, craning his neck slightly to look at you but also making sure to keep his eyes on the road, as if the road is even that busy.
âYou really canât listen, can you?â
That condescending tone again makes your brain nearly short-circuit. Itâs like a dam breaks because suddenly youâre leaning over the console, making your breasts nearly spill out from your tank top, and you want him in your mouth and coming down your throat if itâs the last thing youâll ever do. âCan I?â
 âCan you what, sweetheart? Use your words.â
Christ. âPlease, can I suck on your cock?â
He hums nonchalantly, as if you canât see the way he shifts in his seat or the way heâs hurriedly unbuttoning his jeans with one hand. ââPlease?â Looks like you do have some manners.â
And then heâs taking his cock out and you nearly combust on the spot. Heâs not fully hard, but you still want nothing more than to feel him on your tongue.
Youâre just about to unbuckle your seatbelt to throw yourself into his lap before he stops you by placing his hand over yours.
âNot your mouth, we donât want other people to know what a dirty girl you are. Use your hands,â he says, nonchalant again in a way that makes your heart race and the ache between your thighs grow.
Although the idea of being caught with your head in his lap and cock down your throat suddenly sounds extremely appealing in a way youâve never thought of before, you have no choice but to listen and follow his instructions.
You hesitatingly wrap your hand around him, watching in near fascination at the drop of precum that leaks out. Heâs big here too, satisfyingly thick and warm in your hand. You move your hand up to smear the wetness around him and then start a steady rhythm of pumping his cock.
A strangled groan comes out of Aaron eventually, and you watch as he attempts to throw his head back in ecstasy while still watching the road with half-lidded eyes. The wide expanse of his pretty throat tempts you, imagining what it would be like to pepper kisses up to his tense jaw to help him relax.
Heâs fully hard now, precum steadily leaking out and coating the palm of your hand. You attempt to vary your actions; twisting on the upstroke, squeezing when youâre at the base, or tracing your thumb against the head of his cock. The loud squelching noise makes you feel embarrassed and hot all at the same time, the way itâs drowning out the radioâs music. Your mouth waters as you watch the head of his dick disappear in your fist, wishing you could taste him or see the sheer bliss on his face as he fucks your mouth.
âYou couldnât even wait to get your hands on me, could you?â Aaron murmured, nearly sneering at you. âI bet if I let you, you would let me pull over and fuck you here on the side of the road.â
You swallow nervously, clenching your thighs and trying to ignore the obvious wetness you can feel in your own panties. You squeeze him harder, enthralled by the feeling of his hot flesh against you, and breathlessly whisper âI would.â
He hisses at that, nearly bucking his hips up to follow your hand. âYou would let me fuck you anywhere I want.â
It wasnât a question, but you still feel compelled to answer. âYes.â
Just then, Aaronâs phone rings from the phone mount on the dashboard. Dread and something awfully similar to delight prickles at the back of your neck when you notice the caller ID being your father. Youâre about to retract your hand until Aaron gives you a look out of the corner of your eye, almost like a glare, before his own hand is hot over yours to keep you there.
âKeep going.â
Before you can think of a snarky remark, Aaron swipes at his phone to answer.
âHotchner.â Nonchalant, casual, as if he doesnât have his leaking cock in the hands of his best friendâs daughter.
âHey Hotch, weâre coming up on a great burger joint here in a couple of miles and I wanted to see if you guys were alright with that? I think we lost you.â
You must have been extremely distracted because youâre just now noticing you canât see your fatherâs car ahead of you anymore. There are only a few cars on the highway now after finally passing all the city traffic, now driving through a somewhat rural area. You donât blame yourself after all, because how often do you find yourself giving handjobs to hot older men in their cars?
âI was actually thinking of pulling over at a rest stop, someoneâs not feeling well.â Aaron cranes his neck, raising an eyebrow at you.
Even in the darkness of the summer evening and the sparse streetlights bouncing off the dashboard, the pure and primal desire swimming in his eyes is clear and causes a flush to rise to your face.
âYeah, it must have been lunch,â you attempt to joke, hoping that the rasp in your voice doesnât give you away. You feel Aaronâs cock twitch in your hand.
Your dad hums through the tinny speakers. âYeah, you donât sound so good.â
You notice the car slowing down, not realizing that you were pulling up to a secluded area of a rest stop, right underneath a tree. You glance out the window and take in the fact that the nearest car is over 10 spots away and the closest streetlight is burnt out. You think of the discreet dark color of the car and the tinted windows. Anticipation curls at the bottom of your stomach.
âWeâll let you know when weâre back on the road.â And then Aaron immediately hangs up, parks the car, and leans over the console to kiss you with a hand cradling your cheek.
He cuts to the chase again, kissing you so deeply that your head spins. His mouth is soft but heâs assertive even like this. His hand moves to the back of your neck, taking a hold of you, and your mouth opens in a moan before you can stop yourself, allowing Aaronâs tongue to brush against yours.
When he pulls back, something like a needy whine erupts from your throat. You donât realize that your hands moved to grasp at his polo, leaving Aaronâs cock free and pressed against his stomach.
âYou drive me crazy,â Aaron mutters, brushing a lock of hair behind your head. His gesture and words are impossibly soft, a complete contrast to how he was kissing you, making your breath stutter in your chest.
âYou drive me crazy,â you whisper breathily. âPlease fuck me?â
He huffs a laugh at that, something youâre slowly starting to become familiar with, and tightens his hold on the back of your neck. Thereâs nothing soft in his eyes anymore. âGet in the back, now.â
You scramble to get out of the car, legs nearly shaking. The summer humidity is cloying, suffocating, and you rush to open the door to crawl in the backseat.
The seats are just as large and plush as up front, however thereâs definitely more foot room that youâre sure Aaron will appreciate. Youâre waiting in the middle seat, legs tucked underneath you, as you watch Aaron tuck himself back into his jeans and step out of the car with an air of nonchalance that somehow makes him even more attractive.
When he opens the door to climb into the back, your eyes meet and you suddenly feel frozen to the spot, because he starts to encroach into your space, nearly predatory. Thereâs a glint in his eyes as he places his hand on your back, lowering you so youâre laying on the seats. You unconsciously spread your legs so he could situate himself between them, and the feeling of his large and warm body between your thighs has you hitching them up on his hips.
âYou donât know how long Iâve been thinking about this,â Aaron murmurs before ducking his head to press his mouth against your jawline, down your neck, and finally finally sucking a mark where your shoulder meets.
You exhale a shaky moan, bringing your hands up to run down his back and feel how wide his shoulders are and how you can feel his muscles tense as he moves. The wet heat of his mouth, his obscenely large hands on your hips, and the way his figure nearly engulfs you is mesmerizing.
He pulls back to take a look at you, thumb coming up to press into the mark he made and putting light pressure against your neck. Thereâs something wild and possessive in his eyes, his lips parted like he canât believe whatâs happening. âThere you go. Now youâll remember who you belong to.â
It feels like your breath is knocked out of you and replaced with something equally possessive. âAre you going to fuck me or what?â
Something dark passes over his face. âAnd here I thought you were going to behave.â
Before you could say anything, Aaron is swiftly lifting your tank top up and over your head, throwing it somewhere towards the passenger seat, and groping your tits. He thumbs at your nipples, watching in awe as you arch your back and push your chest further into his hands. The sudden sensation, pleasure zinging up your spine, after being teased for an entire week is dizzying and you want to drown in it.
âYouâre so needy for it, arenât you?â Aaron says, casually, as he pinches at your nipples. You choke on your moan, the initial sting melting into pleasure that makes you feel drunk. âYouâre practically begging for my cock.â
âYes,â you manage to gasp out. Your hands scramble at his shoulders, running up to tangle the soft hairs at the nape of his neck between your fingers. âI need your cock inside me.â
He leans down to suck one of your nipples in his mouth, deft fingers continuing on the other. His mouth is so deliciously wet and hot, expertly licking around you in a way thatâs slowly unraveling you, and you shiver when you think about where else his mouth can be of use. Your eyes nearly roll back in your head and you cant your hips up desperately in an effort to gain some sort of friction against the nearly overbearing ache between your thighs.
His hands come down to press your hips down in an effort to make you stop squirming and you feel him shift until his knee is pressing between your legs and against your pussy through your shorts. The feeling of his warm hands on you and the seam of your shorts rubbing against your clit causes an embarrassingly high-pitched whine to escape your throat.
âYouâre teasing me,â you pant, tugging at his hair experimentally.
Another raspy groan erupts from Aaron and, if possible, you feel hotter. His mouth detaches from your nipple and you instantly miss the hot heat of his mouth, until he says âAnd what if I want to taste that pretty little cunt of yours?â
Imagining Aaron pressing open-mouthed kisses against your thighs, breathing hotly against your panties until heâs pressing his tongue against you, smearing even more wetness around until youâre nearly dripping onto the expensive upholstery has you whimpering. Your mind races as you imagine him pulling your panties aside so he can press his soft mouth against you, licking and lapping at your pussy like youâre a five-course meal, sucking on your clit until youâre screaming his name and begging him to stop.
No words come out, mind nearly melted just at the thought of Aaron looking up at you from between your thighs and his mouth on your cunt. Instead, you let out a breathless moan and attempt to grind down against Aaronâs knee, chasing the little stimulation you can get.
Aaron licks his lips as he watches you, eyes dark and predatory. âYou would like that, wouldnât you?â His thumbs briefly traces your hips, and you nearly miss the tender touch, before heâs hooking them into the waistband of your shorts and tugs them down. âBut we donât have time for that, so Iâm just going to fuck that needy pussy of yours.â
It took quite a bit of wriggling and Aaron hitting his head against the roof of the car to get your shorts and panties off of you, and youâre about to joke that this was an exercise in of itself, until Aaron is settling back between your legs with his own legs crammed underneath him. You suddenly realize Aaron is still wearing all of his clothes, polo wrinkled and pants hanging loosely at his hips, while youâre completely naked and vulnerable, desperate and needy like he said.
His fingers dance across the soft expanse of your thighs until he presses a finger against you, so close to where you need him. You breathe unsteadily and have to close your eyes, suddenly feeling overwhelmed, when Aaron gently grazes between your folds. âFuck, youâre so wet for me, honey. Is this all for me?â
You nod rapidly and push your hips down in an effort to tell him to hurry the fuck up.
Aaron tuts at you. âWhat did I say about using your words?â And then heâs forgoing your clit completely and pressing a thick finger inside.
You gasp, eyes shooting open and meeting his from where heâs watching your face so intently it wouldâve been intimidating if you didnât feel white-hot pleasure take over your body. âYes, Iâm wet, just for you,â you rush out.
He hums, satisfied. âJust for me, right?â He begins thrusting his finger inside of you, and the feeling of being filled and something finally happening has you arching your back against him again, soft whines escaping your mouth before you can help it. The lewd noises from your sopping pussy rings out in the small space of the car, jarring, but it just makes you feel hotter.
âYes, yes, yes,â you babble, attempting to rut your hips down to meet his thrusts, steadily growing in pace. Your hand shoots down to take ahold of his forearm, nearly distracted at the veins popping out, when you feel a second finger prodding at you. âPlease just fuck me already, Iâm ready.â
You watch Aaronâs mouth form what has to be a reprimand, scolding you for being so desperate, but then it closes and forms into something softer even as his gaze is fixated on his thick fingers thrusting in and out of your pussy. He leans in and kisses you before you realize, just a soft press of his lips against yours. When he pulls back, heâs still wearing a faint smile, and tucks a stray strand of your hair behind an ear. Itâs all so painstakingly affectionate, you feel at a loss for words again but for a completely different reason you canât name.
âHow can I say no to you?â he mutters, almost to himself, and it shocks you to your core.
He doesnât wait for a response and pulls out a condom from his back pocket. You watch as heâs about to tear the foil packet open, thoughts turning over and over in your head, before you exclaim âItâs fine, Iâm on the pill.â
He pauses and stares at you, serious based off the pinch of his brows. âAre you sure? I donât mindâŠâ
âIâm sure,â you say, throwing your arms around his neck so you can run your fingers through his hair. And you are absolutely sure, confident, because you know the cherry on top of this whole experience would be feeling his cock spill in your pussy and filling you up. âI want to feel you.â
You watch as he groans, closes his eyes, and leans his forehead against yours, staring at the flutter of his long eyelashes. âYou are killing me, sweetheart.â
You let out a breathless laugh. âAre you kidding me? I can say the same for you.â
Because if you thought Aaron looked good wearing a suit in those blurry pictures on Facebook, it doesnât even compare to how he looks now. His polo tightly stretched over his shoulders, slightly disheveled from where you were grabbing onto him, belt unbuckled and pants hanging deliciously half-open from his hips, and hair tousled, the gel maintaining his professional appearance giving way to make him look younger. Heâs so unbelievably hot you almost believe youâre dreaming.
You watch as he pushes his jeans and boxers down enough to where his cock pops out, the head a sympathetic dark red from where he mustâve been achingly hard this entire time. Before you make another attempt to have him in your mouth, heâs pushing in, stretching you deliciously open and making you grip harder at the hair at his nape.
âFuck, youâre still so tight for me,â Aaron grunts, his hands flying to grasp onto your hips. Â
Although you can feel him sink into you, inch by inch, youâre mesmerized by the sharp focus on his face, the pinch in his brow and eyes clenched shut. As if heâs trying not to throw away all abandon and pound into you, and the thought is so intoxicating it makes your head spin.
âOh my god,â you mumble. He bottoms out, his cock finally pushed all way in your pussy, and heâs much bigger, thicker, than you realized. It feels so, so goodâbeing filled up with his hard cock, his hips pressing against your thighs as they splay out the way youâve been dreaming of for the past week.
âYou okay?â Aaron asks, gentle again, and before you could answer, heâs pulling back and thrusting back into you.
A gasp wretches out of you and your hands scramble at his back, pulling him down because you need him to be closer, need his large body pushing down on you and making you take him.
He lets you, giving you a mockingly sympathetic look, and leans down to press an open-mouthed kiss against your jawline. He starts a steady rhythm thenâthrusting in and out of you and knocking the breath out of you. âYouâre going to take my fat cock, baby? I know youâve been begging for it all week; you need it so bad, donât you?â
Jesus Christ.
Words escape you again, instead, your mouth hangs open as you attempt to nod in response. Even though the carâs AC was blasting, you were covered in sweat and sliding up the seats with every thrust of Aaronâs hips. You definitely werenât complaining, probably wouldnât even be able to because sounds you didnât even know you were capable of making kept coming out of you, eyes nearly permanently rolled back in your head. It felt so good, you didnât think fucking could ever feel this good, but Aaron continues to exceed expectations.
You hitch your legs up his hips higher and let out a high-pitched whine at the change in angle, hot pleasure zinging up your spine. Aaron grunts, something dark and masculine that makes you preen, and his hips start snapping harder, faster.
âLook at you,â he murmurs lowly right into your ear. âBeing fucked so good you canât even speak.â
He shifts again, hands hooking underneath your thighs and, with your nod, presses your knees to your chest until theyâre next to your ears, legs dangling over his shoulders. You wrap your arms around your thighs, holding them in place, and your eyes nearly roll back into your head when Aaronâs cock slides even deeper into your cunt with a wet sound. He feels heavenly, even despite not having touched your clit at all.
He fucks you relentlessly and you think your brain has melted out of your ears because you just take it. The sound of his skin slapping against yours, the litany of groans and praises that fall from his lips, and your nonstop whimpering gasps is heady. You donât even care if you canât come just from him rutting into you alone, it feels too fucking good.
He sits back up, not once breaking his brutal pace, and makes unwaveringly intense eye contact with you. âMy beautiful girl takes my cock so well, making such pretty noises. I canât wait to fill this pussy up with my come.â
You really did not expect Aaron to have the dirty mouth he does, but again, youâre not complaining. Instead, you bring one of your arms down to snake between your thighs where youâre absolutely soaked in your combined wetness and sweat to circle your clit. The added stimulation, finally, has your thighs shaking and your pussy clenching around him. You squirm a bit, because his belt buckle has started to dig into you from where his pants are pooling around his knees, but youâre suddenly so close.
âFuck, AaronâŠâ
He licks his lips at that, starts to fuck into you faster somehow. He knocks your hand aside to replace with his own and you absolutely mewl when you feel the rough callous of his thumb gently circling your clit, impossibly slow. âIs my good girl going to come? Youâre going to come all over my cock, sweetheart?â
Your heart is pounding in your ears, and you can barely detect the strain in Aaronâs voice, like heâs close too. âYes, yes, please,â you stutter, feeling your gut tighten and sweat breaking out on the back of your neck. âHarder.â
Aaron lets out a shaky laugh. âSince you asked so nicely.â
And then heâs rubbing your clit mercilessly, almost too rough if your nerves werenât already so close to snapping. You let out a string of strangled whines, your hands coming up to hold onto Aaronâs free arm for dear life. Youâre so wet that his fingers just glide over you, the wet noises of him fucking into you getting you hotter, making the coil in your stomach wind tighter, but itâs still not enough.
You watch with half-lidded eyes as Aaron lifts his right hand from where he was definitely leaving bruises on your hip to place at the base of your throat. Your eyes widen but you donât stop him because the feeling sends your mind spinning, realizing that you have placed so much trust in this man and heâs thoughtful enough to care for you, treasure you, and fuck you so hard heâs definitely ruined you for anyone else.
His eyes are impossibly dark, hair falling into his face, and you meet his gaze unblinkingly as he puts light pressure on your throat. âCome for me.â
You donât know if itâs the hand on your neck, his cock frantically fucking into you, or the soft baritone of his voice that has you pushing over the edge. You come with a choked gasp of his name, hips and thighs shaking almost uncontrollably. You swear your vision whites out because you donât think youâve ever come so hard in your fucking life.
You distantly hear Aaron grunt your name, feel him fuck into you desperately and erratically. He lets go of your throat, you secretly already miss the weight of his hand, and he clutches at your hips as he chases his own orgasm. It doesnât take long for his hips to stutter, coming into you with a guttural moan that sends a shiver down your back. He grinds his hips into you, like heâs making sure heâs giving you every last drop he has, and the thought has you whimpering.
You stay like that as both of you catch your breath. Your thighs and hips are starting to ache uncomfortably, pussy sore in a way where you know youâll be feeling it tomorrow, but you watch the way Aaron runs his hand through his hair to get it out of his eyes so he can lean in to kiss you, and itâs all worth it.
He pulls out slowly, dick twitching half-way inside of you when you moan at the empty feeling. You feel his come instantly start to drip out of you and onto the seats, and the dangerous glint in Aaronâs eyes has you squirming, heat licking up your back.
âAre you okay?â he asks, leaning over to open the console and hopefully rummage around for a hidden towel. You hope he doesnât pull out old and scratchy fast-food napkins like the ones you have crammed in your glove compartment.
You laugh breathlessly, slowly dropping your legs down to dangle a bit more comfortably. âMore than okay.â
He comes back with a pouch of wet wipes, slightly used, and youâre surprised at the sudden twinge of jealousy you feel when you imagine why he has wet wipes ready in his car and how many other women heâs fucked in his expensive car.
Heâs thorough in cleaning you up, chest rapidly rising and falling as he continues to catch his breath. As if he can read your mind, he looks up at you curiously with no trace of the stern persona he had when he was fucking you mindlessly. You had thought you hid your jealousy well, however you find yourself glaring at the wipes in his hand.
He gives you an achingly sweet smile, a surprise dimple making an appearance, and leans over you where youâre still sweating all over his backseat. âEvery parent has wet wipes in their car.â
You feel your cheeks heat at being caught, that he somehow knew you were drowning in the sudden onslaught of jealousy clawing up your chest. âI didnât say anything.â
âYou didnât have to.â He throws the used wipes on the floor to pick up later, and then heâs wrestling around with you until youâre somehow laying on top of him across the seats, both of your legs bunched up and tangled together.
Youâre sticky and sweaty, and Aaron has nearly sweated through his polo, causing it to cling to his chest in a way that has you wanting to put your hands all over him. So, you do, running your palms up and down him so intently that it gets a chuckle out of him.
âAll of your clothes are still on.â
âWell, I was a little busy.â Oh, heâs a little cheeky after sex.
Both of you are laying in comfortable silence as you still catch your breaths, Aaron moreso than you, when his phone goes off where it hasnât moved from the phone mount. The bright light causes you to squint, and you turn to press your face into Aaronâs chest with a whine. âDonât pick up.â
âAlright, alright,â Aaron says despite him making no moves anyway to get up. He cranes his neck to get a good look at the caller ID and you can feel his body stiffen. âItâs your dad.â
And just like that, a bucket of cold water is splashed over you. You just had sex with your dadâs best friend in his expensive Range Rover in some sketchy rest stop.
You must have froze as well because then Aaron is running a hand up and down your back, making you shiver. Heâs trying to comfort you, you know that, but honestly your thoughts immediately melt into other things that rely on his hands on you. Like pushing your head down between his legs. Maybe heâs right and you really are insatiable.
âCome on, letâs get going.â
-
The car ride the rest of the way to the hotel is mostly silent between you two, the only noises being the wind deafening you and your hair slapping into your face since he rolled the windows down.
To air out the stench of sex in the car, you remember.
You would almost think Aaron was mad, the way he didnât try to make conversation with you, and you knew that you would be spiraling if it wasnât for the fact that he held your hand in his lap the entire time. Â
You probably wouldnât be much for conversation anywayâyouâre already trying not to let your mind race about what you were going to do.
Youâre only here for a couple of weeks, you go to school across the country, and technically, this was only supposed to be a summer fling. You donât technically need to tell your dad about what happened.
You turn to look at Aaron, unabashedly. His hair is still tussled, thanks to your fingers, and thereâs sweat beading along his forehead from the summer humidity. You stare at the sharp slope of his nose, the way the lights from the highway reflect in his dark eyes, and youâre suddenly wracked with the feeling of not wanting to let him go.
He squeezes your hand when he notices you staring for too long. He turns to you, most likely seeing the desperation on your face. He misinterprets it, thinking youâre running over what youâre going to tell your father over and over in your head. He has no idea that you want to keep seeing him, that you want to make this work somehow, whatever is between you two.
âWeâll figure it out.â
When you notice his gentle smile, the methodical way he runs his thumb over the back of your hand, you believe him.
#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x y/n#aaron hotchner x female reader#aaron hotchner fanfiction#criminal minds fic#aaron hotchner fic#dbf!hotch#aaron hotchner smut#dbf!aaron hotchner#repost#aaron hotchner x fem reader#aaron hotchner#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotch x you#aaron hotchner x you
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I love himđ
Spoiled - A.H
a/n: felt feral writing this hope y'all enjoy it as much as i did
think im ovulating or something YALL IDK
anyhow happy reading let me know what yall think đ€
masterlist
â§âË â©Â°ïœĄâ⥠âËâĄâĄ âËâĄâĄâïœĄÂ°â©Ëââ§
pairings: aaron hotchner x fem!reader
summary: in which hotch overhears your conversation with penelope and decides to do something about it
warnings: 18+ MDNI, phone sex!, sex toy!, fem solo masturbation, penelope being a little instigator lmao, dirty talk, soft dom!hotch, established relationship, honestly a little bit of angst whoops, reader is slightly dramatic like hotch has been gone for prob 5 hours STAND UP!
wc: 3.3k
"Penelope Grace Garcia!"
Her comment earned her the full government name, igniting a burst of laughter that you attempt to smother behind your hand. Sinking deeper into the couch, you dismiss the absurdity with a shake of your head. You even find yourself glancing over your shoulder even though you know no one is home.
"You know, I really shouldn't be telling you this, but trust me, that's the least of our worries in this relationship."
"Look, whatever floats your love boat or rocks your bed frame is strictly your business," she comments as if that were the most casual thing to say.
You giggle, a warmth spreading through you as you tread across the kitchen tiles, the phone pressed against your ear.Â
"Oh my god, Pen," you let out a laugh, feeling a soft crimson spread across your cheeks, while your thighs swell with the thoughts of your doting boyfriend. "No, no, like I said we're more than okay in that department. It just gets, well, lonely when he's away."
Your hand curls around the neck of your favorite bottle of red, easing the cork free with a satisfying pop. The liquid swirls into the glass, a little more than probably necessary, as the gentle hiss of water beginning to simmer breaks through the kitchen.Â
"You, my dear, are a saint among mortals."
"Well, he makes it easy," you shrug, pouring the rice into the bubbling pot, a cloud of steam rising to paint the windows.
"Honestly, I don't know how you manage. I'd be itching for it, especially if it's as good as you say," Penelope admits with a dramatic sigh.
You laugh, propping the phone against the backsplash, its speaker projecting the conversation into the room. Aaron stands just out of sight, unnoticed, taking in your every syllable.
"When he gets back, trust me, every second apart seems like a small price to pay."
"Ever thought about getting yourself a toy? You know, for those long nights?" Penelope hints not (at all) so slyly.Â
The wine almost sprays from your mouth as you stifle a surprised splutter. Aaron, still unseen, raises an eyebrow.
"Oh, um, no, I haven't really considered... a toy," you murmur, cheeks burning. You clear your throat, pretending to be engrossed in the simmering pot. "Aaron might have an opinion on that, I guess."
Your attempt at nonchalance was failing, you definitely knew that.
Aaron rested casually against the door frame, a soft smile touching his lips at the sound of your bashful laughter. He'd always had a soft spot for the way your cheeks bloom with color--a sight he wasn't afraid to go great lengths to witness. The idea of a toy seemed to pique his curiosity, drawing a pensive frown as his attention stayed fixed on you for a moment longer.
He slips away silently, his steps carrying him to the front door as you continue your conversation with Penelope.
The call disconnects with a soft click, and you're left in the quiet of the kitchen, unwittingly promising to keep Penelope updated. Turning back to the stove, you stir the sauce with a distracted hand, your lips downturned. Aaron should have been home by now.
The dining table is set, candles flickering, their glow falling on the chair he's yet to fill. You let out a sigh, stealing another look at the ticking clock. The food is ready, but with each passing minute, it grows cooler, just the unfamiliar feeling of disappointment settling in your chest.Â
The audible twist of the key catches your attention, and you can't help but glance over your shoulder. Aaron walks in, his lips curving into a smile upon seeing you.
"Hi, my gorgeous girl," he greets, his voice a familiar sound that kindles a familiar flutter into your heart.
He places his briefcase down, the sound muted, and as he approaches, his lips brush a tender kiss against your temple. The annoyance that had been bubbling inside you melts away with his touch. Damn him.
You turn to him, a sheepish "Hi" fluttering out, your cheeks tinged with heat. It's a feeling that's always fresh, the way he still makes you feel like you're back in high school, hearts doodled in the margins of your notebook.
Aaron settles into his chair, the soft scrape of wood against the tile following his movements.
"Sorry 'M late," he offers, his tone warm, appreciative. "Everything looks and smells wonderful, honey. Thank you."
His fingers gently sweep a loose strand of hair from your face, his smile softening you, disarming you. He's so beautiful.
"You're welcome," you reply, your cheeks growing warmer with each word. "And, um, I hope it's okay. It might be a bit cold. I thought...I guess I assumed you'd be home sooner."
You voice trails off, leaving behind a trail of embarrassed concern, wondering if perhaps you'd somehow overstepped.Â
Aaron looks at you, his eyes turning kind as he discerns the unease on your face.
"I'm sorry, baby, got held up with a little errand." He bites into the food, and a gratified hum indicates his approval. "This is delicious."
You find yourself beaming at the praise. He had a talent for that--praising you, almost as if he'd made it his life mission. This was a first for you in a relationship, and it's exactly why the late nights and time spent alone didn't weigh so heavily.Â
After dinner, you're rinsing off the plates when Aaron's hands draw you close, his hands claiming your waist, the heat of his palms radiating through the fabric of your shirt. He plants a soft kiss on your shoulder.
"Let me help with that. You're spoiling me," he insists, his words spoken into your damp skin.
You lean back into his embrace, his chest flush against your back.
"I like taking care of you," you admit, heart skipping a beat under the weight of his gaze, the softness in his eyes dissolving your concentration on the task at hand.Â
A deep, affectionate groan escapes Aaron as he pulls you even closer. But all good things come to an end, and the ringing of his phone seems like an icy intrusion, like a sudden draft into the kitchen.
"Hotchner," he answers, and even though the word leaves his lips, his fingers gently sketch patterns across your hip.Â
You feel your heart sink. When he hangs up, his eyes lock with yours, brimming with an apology he doesn't voice. It's unnecessary, you already know.
"A case?" You hate how small your voice sounds, dipped in an understanding you wish you didn't have.
He nods, a simple stupid gesture that sends a lump of disappointment soaring up your throat, which you desperately try to swallow down.Â
"Okay... just, be careful, okay? I'll miss you."
"And I'll miss you, angel. Be good for me."
There's a hollowness in the house that follows you through each room. You were well aware of Aaron's demanding job when you started dating--the unpredictable schedule, the sudden departures, the cases that required his immediate attention. Still, this awareness did nothing to soften to sting of his absence. At all.Â
You found yourself wandering aimlessly, picking up a book only to set it down unread, starting a movie but not really watching. Eventually, you ended up in the bedroom, his bedroom, where the subtle scent of his cologne lingers. It's both comforting and heart-wrenching. God, you felt like you were being so dramatic.
You climb into the bed, the sheets cool against your skin, too big and empty without him. Your eyes darts to the phone resting on the nightstand. You've always been careful not to disturb him while he's working, but tonight felt different.
With a trembling hand, you pick up the phone, your thumb hovering indecisively over the screen. Reluctantly, you returned it to its place. There was no point in bothering him.
A sudden draft sent a shiver up your spine, reminding you of the blanket Hotch had bought for you a couple months ago. You sighed, rising from the bed and moving to the closet.
But your eyes skipped over the blanket, instead fixating on a shiny pink bag tucked away in a secluded corner. Compelled by a spike of curiosity, you grabbed the bag and pulled it open. Your eyes widened, cheeks burning with a sudden flush as you placed it on the bed. How long had this been hiding here? And the timing--just after your conversation with Penelope--felt almost too uncanny.Â
You went back to your phone.
Hi
The message was simple. You hit send before you can second-guess yourself.
Almost immediately, your phone vibrated--Aaron's name illuminated the screen. You answer, and his voice was there, infused with immediate concern.
"Hi honey. You okay?" His question was straightforward, cutting through the noise.
You nodded, forgetting for a moment he couldn't see you. Shifting on the bed, you said softly, "Um, yeah, I'm fine. I didn't mean to bother you. Is it a bad time?"
His response is quick. "You could never bother me."
A blush flares on your cheeks, and a smile instinctively forms. You fidget on the bed, the sheets sighing with your movements, sounds that don't escape Aaron's attentive detection.
"Can't seem to find the right spot without me there, huh?"
"I can't seem to do a lot of things without you here," you grumble under your breath, intended more for yourself than for him. The bed emits a soft creak as you turn again, your breath hitching in a pout that he can almost see through the phone. "Aaron, I found something in the closet..."
You lost your words, fingertips tracing the toy's edge, as you fumbled with the strings of your shorts.
"Hmm? Care to enlighten me."
"You know."
You weren't in the mood for his teasing, because you knew he knew. You could sense his smugness, his voice dripping into that familiar, velvety register that prompted your lips to purse.
"I don't know, sweetheart."
Once again, you found yourself stirring against the linen, nibbling on your lip as a wave of exasperation washed over you, your eyes rolling into their sockets.
"Where are you?"
"Just got to my hotel room." You could hear the subtle movements in the background, accompanied by the soft groans of the mattress under his weight. "What did you find in the closet that was so urgent you needed to text me in the middle of my case?"
Your face was warm. "You said it wasn't a bother."
"And I meant it, now spell it out for me."
Your hands cautiously pushed over the toy, examining its buttons and sides. Subconsciously, your tongue swept over your top teeth. You lowered your voice as though someone else might overhear.
"The toy...is it for me? I mean, I would hope so. If not, well, we'd have a rather awkward issue."
"Yes, it's for you, baby."
You stifled a grin. How could he have known? That profiling business was really no joke.
"Why?"
His muffled chuckle filtered through, and you could almost see the flash of his pearly whites. You really missed him, so much so that you were conjuring vision of his mouth of his on places that should not be said aloud.Â
"I just want to make sure my best girl is taken care of when I'm not home." You could practically hear the smirk on his lips.
You were deep in your fantasy now, your free hand sliding down your shorts as you envisioned him propped against the headboard of his hotel bed, tie hanging loosely, hair tousled just so.
"I'm always taken care of by you, Aaron," you said quietly.
You didn't know how to go about this, whatever this even was. You were treading into unknown territory; never having had phone sex with Aaron--or anyone for that matter. It was a far cry from the occasional suggestive text.
"That's right." His voice flowed like honey in your ear, causing a shiver as your finger skimmed over your underwear, your breathing momentarily faltering. "You're going to be well taken care of for the rest of your life, yeah?"
"Yeah."
You could hardly breathe, squirming against your own touch, glancing over at the toy that sat beside your hip.
"I want you to know how much I appreciate your patience. You're a good girl, honey. Far too good for me."Â You weren't. It was the other way around; you didn't deserve him. You told yourself that every day. "I know you get lonely, and I know it's something you'd never admit to."
"Aaron..."
He didn't let you finish. "Why don't you tell me what you're doing right now?"
Your actions came to an abrupt standstill, thumb suspended above your clothed clit. You entertained the thought that this FBI gig might have been a front for a psychic, maybe one of those fortune teller types.
You were mumbling into your sleeve, a private conversation with the threads. "Just...um, well it's hardly worth mentioning, honestly."
Wow you're sure you fooled him.
"I'm not fond of dishonesty." The low rumble of his voice sent a tremor through your core. "I'm giving you a final chance. Tell me what you're doing, sweetheart."
A hard swallow passed your throat, your thumb rubbing idle circles into the band of flesh on your hip.Â
"Well, I, uh, was touching myself." The words felt as awkward as they sounded, an internal wince accompanying each syllable at how unsexy you were speaking.
"Where, sweetheart?"
You exhaled sharply at the question, heavy with exasperation at his insistence on drawing this out. But the slickness between your legs was undeniable. Your hand slid back to the delicate skin between your thighs.
"Aaron, please," you breathed out so faintly it was almost inaudible.
He was playing a cruel game, and he knew it. You hardly cussed let alone talk about your lady parts so openly.
"I hope I've never given you a reason to feel judged, honey." There was a sweetness in his voice that masked his darker intentions. "Just tell me where. I want to help."
Your tongue flicked nervously across your lip, your finger dipping into the valley of your folds as you mulled over his offer. You were wet, far more than you had anticipated, practically coating your thighs in the process.
"No, 'course not," you said softly, biting back a sigh as your thumb worked slowly against your inflamed clit. "It's just, you're so far, Aaron."
"Why do you think I got you that toy?" Your gaze darted to the pink thing, resting against your hip. "I want you to use it. I'll walk you through it, just like I would in person."
You could melt. You could liquefy into nothingness on the spot. Your fingers pressed more urgently against yourself, a deep-seated wish for him to be here surfacing, knowing all the while it was a baseless hope.
"Okay."
"Okay?"
"Yeah, okay."
"There you go, that's my girl."
You couldn't hold back the whimper that fell from your lips as you arched against the bed, fingers diving into your cunt.
"My needy girl," he repeated, his laughter resonating with a patronizing tone that oddly egged you on. "Alright, can you pick up the toy for me?"
You wedged the phone snugly between your shoulder and ear, your hand closing around the pink, curved object, scrutinizing its every detail with careful eyes.
"Okay."
It was big, not as big as Aaron, but its dimensions were nonetheless imposing. You felt your chest heave in anticipation, waiting for his instructions.
His silence was stretching your patience thin. You turned it on, and it came to life, watching as it vibrated, the soft buzz permeating the space. You let it trail over your stomach, fabric gathering as your shirt rode up. Nearing your clit, you braced, taking in a quick breath.
But that breath was released in a strangled moan as you pushed the toy firmly into your sopping hole, legs spreading expansively as a taut sensation gripped your center.
"Did I say you could use it already?" he questioned, his tongue clicking in disapproval as you strained against the device, the second prong vibrations coursing against your nub, your whole-body jerking in response.
"N-No, 'M sorry," you panted, your focus narrowing as you pushed to toy in and out, your lips rounding into an 'o'. "It feels really good, Aar."
"I'm sure it does, baby," he teased, his voice carrying a certainty that your own lacked. "Let me hear you fuck yourself with it.
You loved hearing him curse, it was rare, and usually reserved for intimate moments like this. It fueled your actions, your wrist quickening, driving the device deeper, your stomach twisting in tight knots, a loud moan escaping unrestrained, suddenly you were thankful for the distance between Aaron's house and the next.
It felt so good, and yet somehow still not comparable to how it was with Aaron. Weren't you spoiled?
"Miss you so much," you slurred, your movements stuttering as the device worked your body in ways you didn't know were possible.
"Miss you too, angel. You're doing so good."
"Can you, ah, come home, p-please?"
You weren't even sure of what you were saying, all your thoughts on chasing your high and pretending the toy was Aaron's cock. Thinking about how he'd fill you up right now, how he'd press you to the mattress, how his body would cover yours.
"Your present isn't enough?" His tone was taunting, your eyes welling with tears, clouding your vision as your hips bucked against the toy. "That's a shame, sweetheart, think maybe you've been a little spoiled. You can't have my cock all the time."
You were completely dazed, his sentences barely making their way through the fog as you'd like them to. You were crying, you think, hot and relentless tears carving a path down your face as you fucked yourself harder against the toy.
The noises coming from your pussy were obscene, soaked and squishing as you tried to respond to Aaron, but nothing but small hiccups were escaping your mouth.
"It's okay, baby, I know. You're doing so good for me. I can hear it."
Your cheeks and ears flared with a heat that spelled out your shame, but it was the least of your concerns. Your walls tightened against the device, the pressure on your clit suddenly all too much and not enough at the same time. Gasping for air, your breaths came out in uneven bursts. When you tried to call out Aaron's name, it emerged as nothing more than a choked sob.
"C-Can I? Please, need to so bad." You weren't entirely convinced you were speaking English, but Aaron understood.Â
"Go ahead, sweetheart."
That was all you needed. Your cunt contracted again before vaulting over the edge, nearly losing consciousness in the process, a string of moans and half-said words pouring out of your lips.
You could hear the sound of his voice, but the words were just out of reach, not fully making sense. You felt your body twitch, and you blinked deliberately, once, twice, three times, in an effort to reconnect your body to your mind.
"You're so good, baby. So good. Miss you so much."
You pulled the toy, now soaked, from yourself, cringing at the lewd sound as you laid it beside you, making a mental note to wash the sheets later. Although if Aaron had his way that wouldn't happen.
"I miss you." You hated the way your voice betrayed ever emotion you had.
"Need you to go pee for me, sweetheart."
He sounded so soft and tired, but somehow still present. You let out a soft snicker as you curled onto your side.Â
"Can't move my legs," you mumbled, the sound muffled by the way your cheek was squished into the pillow. "Need you to come carry me."
His laugh was something you wished you could bottle up. "Spoiled."
"And who's to blame for that?" You were ready for his witty retort, but it was cut short by the sudden flash of your phone. You squinted at the caller ID. "Sorry, Penelope is calling me, can I call you back in a second?"
"Course, honey. Thank her for the idea, yeah?" Your mouth fell open as you scrambled for the right words. Of course he had heard. "Also, I plan on spending a few solid hours fucking you when I get home, so I suggest you get some rest."
taglist: @hotchhner @khxna
#aaron hotchner smut#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x fem reader#hotch smut#hotchner#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner fic
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This is amazingggggggg, bro my fixation of his hands is just- bad in itself. THIS ENCAPSULATED IT IN ONE GO
im obsessed with reidâs hands. Heâs got gorgeous long fingers its justđ«¶đ»đ©. Id like to request a fic/blurbs whichever you prefer, revolves around that.. maybe he knows the reader loves his hands (especially when he cradles her face-neck and hair pulling).. nothing too spicy tho.. if you dont mind. Love your fics smđ„č
Where Hands Lead - S.R
a/n: i am also a victim to being desperately obsessed with spencer's hands! guilty af! and thank u so much babes i appreicate the love and the request <3
masterlist
pairings: spencer reid x reader
warnings: established relationship, hand kink, spencer being a smug little shit, domestic fluff, teasing galore, just two cuties being ridiculously in love!
wc: 1.6k
Spencer Reid's hands were a marvel. You couldn't pinpoint the exact moment you noticed them--maybe it was the day you saw him fiddling with a pen during a team meeting, his fingers deftly spinning it like he'd been born doing it. Or maybe it was the time he'd held out a hand to help you up after you got knocked on your ass after rough case, his long fingers wrapping around yours, pulling you to his feet. Whatever the moment, the realization hit you like a freight train: Spencer's hands were distracting.Â
Of course, you never said it out loud. Not at first. How do you casually tell your boyfriend that his hands are your newest fixation? You'd settled for sneaky glances, admiring the way his fingers moved over the keys of his computer or absentmindedly tapped against his thigh when he was lost in thought.Â
You thought you were being subtle.
But Spencer was sharper than you gave him credit for... and you gave him a lot of credit.
It started with small things. The way he'd catch you staring and tilt his head slightly, curiosity painting his features. Or how his lips would quirk into the barest smile when he'd reach for something near you and your gaze lingered a second too long. He'd never said anything, but you had the nagging suspicion he was onto you.
Then came the day he decided to test his theory.
It had been a rare quiet evening at his apartment. The team's latest case had wrapped up earlier than expected, leaving you both with an unexpectedly free night. Spencer, ever the perfectionist, had insisted on cooking dinner. You'd agreed easily, not-so-secretly thrilled at the prospect of spending uninterrupted tie with him. He'd shooed you out of the kitchen when you tried to help, insisting that you relax while he handled everything.
You were setting the table when it started. Spencer reached over to hand you a glass, his fingers brushing against yours. You glanced at him quickly, hoping he hadn't noticed the way your breath caught.
He had.
Spencer's expression didn't give away much--just the faintest quirk of his lips as he turned back to the counter. He began chopping vegetables, his fingers expertly curling and flexing around the knife. The movement was smooth, precise, almost hypnotic, and before you knew it, your eyes were drawn to them again.
"Everything okay over there?" he asked casually, not looking up. His voice was innocent enough, sure, but there was a certain lilt to it that made your cheeks heat.
"Fine," you replied, probably too quickly, forcing your attention back to the table. You busied yourself with arranging the plates, trying to will away the warmth spreading through you.Â
Spencer, however, wasn't finished with whatever game he seemed to be playing. As you moved past him to grab utensils, he shifted just enough for his hand to brush against the small of your back. The touch was so light it could have been accidental, but it lingered just a fraction too long to be dismissed entirely. The warmth of it sparked along your spine, making your pulse leap in a way you couldn't quite explain.
What was wrong with you today? He was your boyfriend, for crying out loud. Casual touches like this were normal--expected, even. And yet, every brush of his fingers seemed to unravel you more. You cast a quick glance up at him, trying to gauge if he'd noticed your reaction, but Spencer simply smiled, his expression innocent, as if nothing out of the ordinary had just happened.
You clenched the utensils in your hand, suddenly desperate to shake off this fixation before Spencer figured out what was going on. The last thing you needed was for him to think you were completely crazy--obsessed with something as specific as his hands. Surely, that wasn't normal.Â
 By the time you finally sat down to eat, your nerves were fully frayed. Flustered didn't even begin to cover it. Spencer, on the other hand, looked completely at ease. He moved with his usually calm efficiency, placing food on the table with a soft smile. As he handed you a serving spoon, his fingers brushed against yours once again--warm, gentle, and far too distracting. You lingered a second longer than necessary, and while he didn't say a word, the subtle upward twitch of his lips suggested he notice.
Determined to pull yourself together, you focused on your plate. Or at least, you tried. Every movement Spencer made seemed designed to draw your attention. The way his long fingers curled around his fork, deliberate and precise, made your breath hitch. His index finger tapped lightly against the side of his glass as he considered something. Even the simple act of wiping his mouth with his napkin--slow, measured, maddeningly deliberate--seemed orchestrated to unravel you.
When dinner ended, you were quick to rise, eager to clear the table and escape the tight coil of your own thoughts. But Spencer was quicker. Before you could take a single step, his hand caught your wrist, fingers curling around you with just enough pressure to stop you in your tracks.
"I'll take care of it," he said, thumb brushing against the inside of your wrist before letting go.
Normally, you would argue. He'd cooker dinner, after all--it was only fair that you clean up. But today left you rooted to the spot. You sank back into your chair, wordless, your gaze following him as he moved around the kitchen.
Spencer rolled his sleeves up to his elbows, revealing the lean muscle of his forearms, and your eyes betrayed you once again, drawn back to his hands. The way they worked was mesmerizing--graceful and efficient as he dried plates, stacked dishes, and wiped down the counters with practiced ease.Â
Spencer must have felt your gaze because he glanced over his shoulder, lips curving into a slow, knowing smile. He didn't rush, taking his time as he finished tidying up. When he was done, he dried his hands on a dish towel, then set it aside before making his way back to you. His hands were empty now, but no less captivating.
Stopping in front of your chair, Spencer lowered himself to one knee, his eyes meeting yours. "Is there something you want to tell me?"
Heat swelled to your face, mind scrambling for something--anything--coherent to say. "I--what?"
Spencer chuckled softly, his hand reaching up to tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear. "You're not as subtle as you think."
You opened your mouth to protest, but the look in his eyes stopped you.
"Next time," he continued, his thumb moving to brush against your cheek, his touch featherlight, "just tell me. I'd hate for you to sit there suffering in silence."
"I... don't know what you mean."
Spencer raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. "Oh, is that right?"
You nodded quickly.
"So you wouldn't mind if I did this?" he murmured, reaching out to cup your cheeks with the utmost care.
The warmth of his touch seeped into your skin, his thumb brushing slow, delicate arcs along your cheekbones. His fingers, long and steady, curled around the sides of your face, glueing you in place. Your breath hitched, the air between you thickening as your thoughts scattered like leaves in the wind. Words failed you, leaving only the rapid thrum of your heart.
"Or this?" he added, voice softer now, almost a whisper. His fingers slid upward, tangling in your hair with a sort of practiced ease that sent sparks racing along your legs. He tugged lightly, just enough to tilt your head and pull a soft, involuntary gasp from your lips. The gentle pressure was intoxicating, and you bit down on your bottom lip, completely undone.
"Spencer..." you managed, though it barely passed a whisper. His name trembled on your lips, a plea and a confession all at once.
"Or this?" he continued, one hand sliding down to rest on your thigh. His fingers curled just slightly. Your pulse quickened, a fluttering sound that betrayed just how completely he had you in his grasp. Spencer leaned in closer, expression smug, lips moving into a smile that left you breathless.Â
"And what about this?" he added, voice dropped to a hushed murmur as his hand moved to tilt your chin upward. Before you could respond, his lips found yours. The kiss was slow, purposeful, and impossible to do anything but melt into. His hands moved back to cradle your face, fingers brushing against your jaw and the sensitive curve of your neck, their touch igniting a fire that spread through your entire body.
When he finally pulled away, you felt like all the air had been vacuumed from your lungs, cheeks flushed and heart pounding so loudly you were sure he could here it.
"Yeah, um," you stammered, the words tumbling out awkwardly as you struggled to regain your footing, "I don't think I mind... you could, uh, do it again if you wanted to."
Spencer's lips quirked into a slow, satisfied smile, his eyes sparkling. "Oh, is that so?"
He leaned in once more, capturing your lips in another kiss. This time, it was slower, unhurried, as if he were savoring every second.Â
He leaned in to kiss you again, this time slower, savoring the moment.
When he pulled back, hands still cradling your face, he chuckled softly. "You know lucky for you, if my hands are your favorite thing about me, I've got two of them and all the time in the world."
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IM SCREAMING FOR THIS DYNAMIC đ«¶đ»đ«¶đ»đ«¶đ»
guys my age - spencer reid


Ëââ§ê°á â à»ê± â§âË
who? professor spencer reid x student fem!reader
category: slow burn, forbidden love.
content warnings: NSFW MDNI! age gap! (spencer is in his 40s, reader is in her 20s). dubious content. freakish obsessed reader, freakish obsessed spencer. dom!spencer, but reader is pretty controlling. borderline stalking. unprotected p in v. forbidden love. power dynamics. smut. spencer cums inside :]
word count: around 8k
a/n: hi all!! this is my first post, i used to write wayyy back in the day but after a long three years and finally finishing my degree, i now have all the time in the world to write again. feedback is greatly appreciated <3
The lecture hall was alive with murmurs, but you couldnât hear them. All you could focus on was the moment that door would open, the instant he would walk in. Dr. Spencer Reid. His name consumed you, whispered endlessly in the back of your mind, an invocation that made your pulse quicken. You had done your research long before the semester beganâhis credentials, his publications, the infamous cases heâd worked. He wasnât just brilliant. He was untouchable. But not to you.
You sat deliberately in the middle row, far enough back to observe him fully, close enough to feel like he was speaking directly to you. The moment he entered, time seemed to slow. His presence was overwhelming, his voice a melody that wrapped around you, dragging you under. Every movement he madeâthe way his fingers toyed with the edge of his lecture notes, the slight adjustment of his glassesâwas a spectacle.
âGood morning, everyone. Welcome to Advanced Criminology. Iâm Dr. Spencer Reid.â His voice was smooth and confident, with an underlying warmth that immediately put you at ease.
For the next hour, you sat transfixed as he delved into the complexities of criminal behavior, weaving together case studies and theories with an ease that only someone with his expertise could manage. He had a way of making even the most intricate concepts accessible, his passion for the subject evident in every word. By the end of the lecture, you were utterly captivatedânot just by the material, but by the man who delivered it.
Perfectly ironed white shirt, sleeves rolled up his forearms. The same black suit pants youâd seen countless times when you closed your eyes. Unruly curls lay in a perfect mess, somehow each strand just fit. His eyes held knowledge, they commanded attention. They looked at you with such an intensity, you wondered if he could see right through you. Sure, he wasnât blind. Dr. Spencer Reid was a genius, after all. But, as he walks around his classic oak desk, fingers grazing against the wood as he leans up against it, you wonder if he knows the effect he has on you⊠On everyone.
Your old professor had resigned, much to your dismay. However, that was quickly resolved once you learnt of the new, much younger professor who was assigned to take his place. Spencer Reid, a name that seemed like a curse every time it was spoken. Youâd just have to settle for admiring from afar, for now.Â
He was perfect. No, he was more than that. He was yours.
In those first weeks, it became routine to linger after class, pretending to ask questions about criminological theories when all you wanted was his attention. You started tracking his habits: the exact time he arrived on campus, where he grabbed his coffee, the path he took to his office. It wasnât enough to listen to him during lectures. You needed to know him. Needed to understand every nuance of his life.
Your notebooks filled slowly. Not just with his words, but with sketches of his hands, his profile, even the way the light hit his hair during evening lectures. You memorized his mannerisms and read every book he recommendedânot just to excel but to mirror his thoughts, to create a bond he couldnât ignore.
Each interaction became a drug, a fleeting high that left you craving more. The way his eyes lingered on yours during class wasnât a coincidence. You were sure of it. The moments his voice softened when addressing you were evidence of something deeper. He felt it tooâhe had to.
Dr. Reid, for his part, seemed to enjoy your curiosity. He would patiently answer your questions, occasionally sharing anecdotes from his time in the field. There was a depth to him that intrigued you, a sense of vulnerability hidden beneath his intellect. You couldnât help but feel a growing admiration for himâone that you knew was dangerous to entertain.
It happened on a rainy Friday afternoon. You had stayed behind after class to discuss a particularly challenging case study, and the conversation had spilled into his office. The rain pattered against the window as you sat across from him, your notes spread out on the desk between you.
âIâm impressed with your analysis,â he said, his eyes meeting yours. âYou have a natural aptitude for this field.â
The compliment sent a flush of warmth through you, but you quickly pushed it aside. âThank you, Dr. Reid. That means a lot coming from you.â
For a moment, the air between you shifted, the professional boundary wavering ever so slightly. He seemed to sense it too, clearing his throat and looking away. âWell, uh, keep up the good work. Iâm looking forward to seeing your perspective on the next assignment.â
As you gathered your things and prepared to leave, you couldnât shake the feeling that something unspoken lingered between you. It was subtle, like the faintest trace of electricity in the air, but it was there. And it terrified you.
The weeks turned into months, and the connection between you and Dr. Reid continued to deepen. It wasnât intentionalâat least, thatâs what you told yourself. You simply couldnât help the way your conversations seemed to flow effortlessly or the way his insights resonated with you on a level that felt personal.
There were moments when you caught him watching you during lectures, his gaze lingering a fraction longer than necessary. And then there were the times when his praise felt almost... intimate, as if he saw something in you that went beyond your academic abilities.
You knew it was wrong. He was your professor, and the power dynamic alone made any kind of relationship inappropriate. But the more you tried to suppress your feelings, the stronger they seemed to grow. You found yourself yearning for his company, for the way his mind worked, for the rare glimpses of vulnerability he shared.
And you werenât entirely sure he was immune to it, either.
It was during a late-night office visit that everything came to a head. You had been working on your final paper and were struggling with a particular section. Dr. Reid had offered to review it, and you had jumped at the chance, grateful for his guidance.
As you sat across from him, discussing your ideas, the tension that had been building between you finally reached its breaking point. There was a moment of silence as he leaned back in his chair, his eyes searching yours.
âYouâre incredibly talented,â he said softly. âI hope you know that.â
The vulnerability in his voice caught you off guard, and before you could stop yourself, you replied, âItâs easy to feel that way when someone like you believes in me.â
The words hung in the air, heavy with meaning. He looked at you, his expression a mixture of conflict and longing. âThis...â he began, his voice barely above a whisper. âThis canât happen. I wonât elaborate further, but youâre a smart girl⊠I know you know what I'm talking about.â
You nodded, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. âI know.â
But even as you said it, neither of you moved to leave. All you received was a curt nod. The pull between you was undeniable, and in that moment, it felt as though the world had narrowed to just the two of you.
The night of the gala was your chance. You spent hours perfecting your appearance, knowing he would notice you in a way he never had before. And when he did, when his eyes locked onto you with that unreadable expression, it was like the entire world fell away.
When he led you to the corner of the room, your heart pounded, not with fear, but with anticipation. His frustration, his struggle to maintain control, only proved how deeply you had affected him.
âWhat are you doing?â He demanded, his voice low and sharp.
You tilted your head, feigning innocence. âI donât know what you mean, Dr. Reid.â
His jaw clenched, his composure slipping. âYou know exactly what I mean. Youâve been crossing lines all semester.â
You stepped closer, the scent of his cologne intoxicating. âAnd what if I have?â
His gaze burned into yours, his control fraying with each passing second. âThis has to stop.â He said, though his tone lacked conviction.
But you knew better. You had studied him, unraveled him piece by piece. He wasnât as strong as he pretended to be. And neither were you.
âMaybe I donât want it to.â You whispered, your voice trembling with both fear and desire.
For a moment, his eyes softened, as if seeing the truth of your obsession for the first time. âObsession is a dangerous game.â he murmured, more to himself than to you.
You would burn the whole world down if it meant keeping him close.
The world outside of Dr. Reidâs orbit ceased to matter. Friends became an afterthought. Classes, even the ones youâd once excelled in, were nothing more than obligations. Every moment not spent in his presence felt wasted. His words were etched into your memory, his voice a constant echo in your mind.
You found excuses to linger near his office, pretending to read in the hallway or jotting down notes on topics that had long ceased to matter. Sometimes youâd see him through the small window of his door, head bowed over papers, fingers absently running through his tousled hair. Those moments were sacred.
And then there were the nights.
Your dreams became a battleground, the lines between fantasy and reality blurring. You would see him, hear him, feel the phantom weight of his gaze. Waking up was a cruel joke, pulling you from a world where he was already yours. More than once, you had the fleeting urge to knock on his door late at night, under the pretense of needing help.
But you stopped yourself. Barely.
For now.
When he praised you in class, it felt personal, intimate. You lived for those moments. The way he would say your name, how his eyes would flicker with something unreadableâthose seconds were your lifeline. But it wasnât enough. You wanted more. You needed more.
You started keeping track of the little details. The brand of pens he used. The scuff on his leather satchel. The faint hint of lavender in his cologne. Youâd bought the same scent, spraying it on your pillow just to feel closer to him at night.
One evening, you followed him. It wasnât intentional, not at first. He left the lecture hall as you lingered, and without thinking, you gathered your things and trailed behind him. He walked briskly, head down, weaving through the near-empty campus. You stayed far enough back to avoid suspicion but close enough to study him.
He stopped at the local bookstore, his long fingers running over the spines of books with a reverence that made your chest tighten. You hid behind a display, watching him as he browsed. When he left, you waited a few moments before approaching the same section. He had lingered near the true crime section, and you traced the path of his fingers, touching the same books he had touched.
It became a ritual after that. You discovered his favorite haunts: the coffee shop where he always ordered black coffee with two sugars, the quiet corner of the library where he would sometimes sit and read, the park where he walked on Sunday mornings. You were careful, meticulous, ensuring he never saw you. But you saw him.
Every time you caught a glimpse of him, it felt like a secret, a moment that belonged solely to you.
The gala had been your boldest move yet, and the way his gaze lingered on you that night had only fueled the fire. His warning echoed in your mind, but you dismissed it. He said you were crossing boundaries, but you knew better. He was simply scared. Scared of what this meant. Scared of what you meant.
You decided to leave him something. A token, something small enough to avoid suspicion but personal enough that he would know it was from you. A first edition of one of the books he had mentioned in class. You placed it on his desk after everyone had left, your heart racing as you imagined his reaction.
The next day, you waited, anticipation coiling in your stomach like a serpent. When he walked into class, the book was in his hand. His eyes scanned the room, lingering on you for a moment too long before he placed it in his bag without a word.
It was a victory.
But victories, you realized, were fleeting.
One evening, as you left the library, you spotted him walking toward his car. The parking lot was empty, save for the two of you, and for the first time, you didnât bother to stay hidden. You followed him openly, your footsteps echoing against the pavement.
He stopped abruptly, turning to face you.
âWhy are you following me?â He asked, his voice sharp but not unkind. His eyes held a mixture of curiosity and something darker, something you couldnât quite place.
Your breath caught, but you forced a smile. âI wasnât following you, Dr. Reid. I just happened to be walking this way.â
His gaze didnât waver. âThis isnât the first time, is it?â
The accusation hung in the air, and for a moment, you thought about denying it. But then, something inside you snapped.
âNo.â You admitted, your voice trembling. âItâs not.â
His expression shiftedâconfusion, disbelief, and something else flickered across his face. âWhy?â
The word was a whisper, barely audible, but it was enough to unravel you.
âBecause I canât stop thinking about you,â you said, the words tumbling out in a rush. âI canât eat, I canât sleepâI canât focus on anything but you. Youâre brilliant, and kind, and perfect, and Iââ
âStop,â he interrupted, his voice firm. âThis isnât healthy.â
You took a step closer, desperation clawing at your chest. âBut itâs real. You know it is. I see the way you look at me. Donât pretend you donât feel it too.â
He took a step back, shaking his head. âThis has to endâŠnow. Do you understand me?â
But you didnât believe him. Not really. Because you had seen the way his hands trembled when you were near, the way his voice softened when he spoke to you. He was scared, yes, but not of you. He was scared of himself.
And that, you realized, was all the encouragement you needed.
Dr. Reidâs words echoed in your mind for days after the encounter in the parking lot. This has to end. But the way he said it, the way his voice wavered ever so slightly, betrayed him. It wasnât conviction; it was fear. Fear of what you had awakened in him.
You were sure of it now. He wasnât immune to you. Not entirely.
The proof came in small, fleeting momentsâtoo subtle for anyone else to notice, but to you, they were glaring signs. The way his eyes lingered on you during lectures, his gaze softening before he quickly looked away. The way he adjusted his tie when you walked into the room, as if suddenly self-conscious. And then there were the compliments, so carefully worded that they might seem innocent to others, but to you, they felt personal. Intimate.
Still, he kept his distance. Even when you sought him out after class, he kept the conversations brief, his tone polite but clipped. It was maddening, the way he seemed to hold himself back.
But then, there were cracks.
One afternoon, you arrived at his office under the guise of needing help with a research topic. He hesitated before letting you in, his hand lingering on the doorknob as if debating whether this was a mistake.
Once inside, the air between you was charged. He sat across from you, his hands folded on the desk, but his gaze flickered to your lips more than once as you spoke.
When you handed him a stack of notes, your fingers brushed, and he pulled back quickly, too quickly.
âSorry.â He murmured, his voice barely above a whisper.
You smiled, leaning forward just enough to close the space between you. âItâs okay.â
For a moment, his composure faltered. His eyes locked onto yours, and the tension was unbearable. You could see it in his faceâthe war he was waging within himself.
Then, just as quickly, he stood, turning his back to you as he busied himself with a stack of papers on the shelf. âYour analysis is impressive,â he said, his tone suddenly distant. âYouâre clearly passionate about the subject.â
The shift was jarring, but it only solidified your resolve. He wasnât rejecting you. He was protecting himself.
That evening, you stayed late in the library, poring over the materials he had assigned. As you packed up to leave, you noticed a familiar figure in the far corner. He was seated at a table, his long fingers flipping through a thick volume, his expression distant.
You froze, your heart pounding. He hadnât noticed you yet. For a moment, you considered leaving, but the pull was too strong.
You approached slowly, the sound of your footsteps drawing his attention. When he looked up, his eyes widened slightly, a flicker of something unguarded crossing his face before he composed himself.
âStaying late?â He asked, his voice calm, but his fingers tightened on the edge of the book.
You nodded, setting your bag down on the table. âI could ask you the same thing.â
He gave a faint smile, though it didnât reach his eyes. âI find the library... peaceful.â
âMe too.â You said softly, taking a seat across from him.
The silence that followed was heavy, filled with the unspoken tension that had been building for months. His eyes flicked to yours, then away, as if he couldnât decide whether to meet your gaze or avoid it entirely.
Finally, he cleared his throat. âYou should be careful, you know. Spending so much time in my office, lingering after classâitâs not... appropriate.â
Your heart twisted at the words, but his tone was anything but stern. It sounded like a warning, but it felt like a confession.
âDo you want me to stop?â You asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
He didnât answer right away. Instead, he looked down at his hands, his fingers flexing as if resisting the urge to reach for somethingâor someone.
âItâs not about what I want.â He said finally, his voice strained.
But it was. You could see it in the way his shoulders tensed, in the way his gaze lingered on you when he thought you werenât looking. He wanted you just as much as you wanted him. He was just better at pretending otherwise.
The next day, during his lecture, you felt his eyes on you more than usual. He paced the room as he spoke, his hands gesturing animatedly, but every so often, his gaze would drift to you, his words faltering for the briefest moment before he recovered.
It was intoxicating, knowing you could unravel him like this.
After class, as the other students filtered out, you stayed behind, your heart racing as you approached his desk.
âDr. Reid,â you began, your voice steady despite the storm brewing inside you.
He looked up, his expression unreadable. âYes?â
You hesitated, searching for the right words, but before you could speak, he sighed, running a hand through his hair.
âYouâre relentless.â He said softly, almost to himself.
The words sent a shiver down your spine.
âI just want to understand you.â You said, stepping closer.
He shook his head, a faint, almost bitter smile playing on his lips. âYou already understand too much.â
For a moment, neither of you moved. The space between you felt impossibly small, the air thick with tension. You could see the struggle in his eyes, the way he fought to maintain control, but you also saw the flicker of something darker, something he couldnât quite suppress.
And in that moment, you knew: this wasnât over.
It was only just beginning.
It started innocently enoughâat least, thatâs what you told yourself.
The male student, a classmate you barely knew, had approached you after lecture to ask about the upcoming project. His name was Ethan, and while he was polite and charming, you couldnât muster much interest in the conversation. Still, you smiled and nodded at his jokes, your polite laughter echoing in the near-empty hall.
Unbeknownst to you, Dr. Reid had lingered behind, tidying up his desk and organizing his papers. His sharp ears caught the sound of your laughter, a melody he had grown far too familiar withâand possessive of.
He looked up to see you standing near the doorway, your body language relaxed as Ethan leaned in slightly, his tone conspiratorial. Spencerâs grip on the edge of the desk tightened.
Ethanâs laugh was loud, too loud, as if he wanted to broadcast how much he enjoyed your company. Spencerâs jaw clenched. He knew this was ridiculous. He was your professor, and it wasnât his place to interfere with your social life. But the sight of another man so close to you, taking liberties he couldnât, made his blood boil.
When you glanced back into the classroom, likely to gather your things, your eyes met Spencerâs. For a fleeting moment, his mask slipped, and you saw something dark and raw flicker across his face. It was gone just as quickly, replaced by his usual calm demeanor, but the image stayed with you.
âEverything alright, Dr. Reid?â You asked, stepping inside and leaving Ethan to wait by the door.
Spencer straightened, clearing his throat. âYes. Just... finishing up.â
Ethan peeked his head in. âReady to go?â He asked, his tone casual but his presence invasive.
Spencerâs eyes darted to Ethan, then back to you. âYou should be careful with your time,â he said, his voice quiet but pointed. âThe project deadline isnât as far off as it seems.â
You frowned, confused by the sudden shift in his tone. âIâll make sure to stay on top of it.â
His gaze lingered on you for a moment longer, as if debating whether to say more. Instead, he turned his attention back to his desk, his movements stiff and deliberate.
The next few days were marked by a subtle shift in Spencerâs behavior. During lectures, his eyes seemed to find you more often, but they were no longer soft or conflicted. There was an intensity to his gaze now, a quiet possessiveness that sent shivers down your spine.
When Ethan approached you again after class, Spencerâs reaction was immediate.
âMiss L/N.â He called out, his voice carrying across the room.
You turned, surprised to see him still at his desk. âYes, Dr. Reid?â
âCould you stay for a moment? Iâd like to discuss your recent paper.â
Ethan hesitated, clearly waiting for you, but Spencerâs sharp gaze left no room for argument. âI wonât keep her long.â He said smoothly, though his smile didnât reach his eyes.
Ethan nodded reluctantly. âIâll catch you later.â
As soon as the door closed behind him, Spencerâs demeanor shifted. He stood, his tall frame looming as he approached you.
âIs he bothering you?â He asked, his tone casual but his eyes anything but.
âEthan? No, not at all. Why would you think that?â
Spencerâs lips pressed into a thin line. âHe seems... persistent. I just want to make sure youâre not feeling pressured.â
You couldnât help but smile, amused by his sudden protectiveness. âIâm fine, Dr. Reid. Really.â
He nodded, but his expression didnât soften. âGood. Iâd hate to see someone distract you from your potential.â
The words were innocent enough, but the way he said themâthe way his eyes lingered on yoursâmade your breath catch.
It wasnât long before his jealousy became harder to hide.
During a group discussion, Ethan made a point of sitting next to you, his arm brushing against yours as he leaned over to share his notes. Spencerâs gaze locked onto the interaction, his hand tightening around the marker in his grip until his knuckles turned white.
When Ethan made a joke and you laughed, Spencer interrupted sharply. âLetâs stay on topic, please. This isnât a social hour.â
The class fell silent, startled by his uncharacteristic tone. You glanced at him, surprised by the edge in his voice. He avoided your gaze, turning back to the whiteboard with rigid movements.
After class, as students filtered out, he called your name again.
âI wanted to apologize,â he said, his voice softer now. âI was... out of line earlier.â
âItâs okay.â You replied, though you couldnât hide your confusion.
He hesitated, his eyes scanning your face as if searching for something. âYou have to understand,â he began, his voice dropping lower, âthat I only want whatâs best for you. Not everyone has your best interests at heart.â
âAre you talking about Ethan?â
Spencerâs jaw tightened, but he didnât answer directly. âJust... be careful who you trust.â
The weight of his words hung heavy between you, and for the first time, you wondered if his concern was more than professional.
Later that evening, you found yourself thinking about him again, replaying the moments when his composure slipped, when his obsession peeked through the cracks. You didnât know whether to be scared or thrilled.
But one thing was certain: Spencer Reid was unraveling, and you were the one pulling the thread.
The days that followed were an intricate dance of tension, each interaction with Dr. Reid pulling you closer to a dangerous edge. His jealousy, once simmering beneath the surface, began to bleed into every corner of your academic life, coloring the way he spoke to you, the way he looked at you, the way he made his presence impossible to ignore.
It started small.
Ethan asked you to partner up for a case study project, and though you agreed, the arrangement didnât go unnoticed. During the next lecture, Spencer called on you repeatedly, his questions increasingly challenging, as if testing your limits. The rest of the class shifted uncomfortably, sensing the deliberate scrutiny, but you met his gaze head-on, refusing to falter.
Afterward, he lingered at the podium, watching as Ethan hovered near your seat, leaning down to talk to you. The sight made his stomach churn. He didnât like how Ethanâs hand rested casually on the back of your chair, how his laughter seemed designed to draw your attention.
âMiss L/N, a word?â Spencerâs voice cut through the air, sharp and commanding.
âWhatâs this about?â You asked, crossing your arms.
He tilted his head, his gaze piercing. âI noticed you and Ethan are working together.â
âWe are,â you said carefully. âIs there a problem?â
His jaw clenched. âNo... as long as youâre confident heâll contribute equally. He strikes me as the type to let others carry the weight of the work.â
You frowned. âThatâs not fair. Heâs been helpful so far.â
Spencer leaned in slightly, his voice lowering. âHelpful isnât always the same as trustworthy. Just keep that in mind.â
You stared at him, the intensity in his tone sending a shiver down your spine. He wasnât just warning youâhe was staking a claim, subtle but unmistakable.
The breaking point came during a departmental mixer, an event meant to encourage networking among students and faculty.
You had hesitated to attend, but Ethan insisted, offering to walk you there. Spencer spotted you as soon as you entered, his sharp eyes narrowing when he saw Ethanâs hand at the small of your back, guiding you through the crowd.
He approached you moments later, his movements precise and deliberate. âMiss L/N, a pleasure to see you here.â
âDr. Reid.â You greeted, your smile nervous under the weight of his gaze.
âAnd Ethan,â Spencer added, his tone clipped. âEnjoying the event?â
âYeah, itâs great,â Ethan replied, oblivious to the tension. âI was just telling Y/N about a conference coming up in D.C. Sheâs thinking about attending.â
âIs she?â Spencer asked, his eyes locking on yours.
Ethan nodded. âI might go too. We could share accommodations to save on costs.â
The suggestion made Spencerâs blood run cold. His mind spiraled with images of you and Ethan alone, the boundaries he fought so hard to maintain crumbling under the weight of his jealousy.
âThat wonât be necessary.â Spencer said abruptly.
Both you and Ethan blinked in surprise.
âI mean,â he added, forcing a smile, âitâs likely the university will have funding options available for individual accommodations. Iâd be happy to look into it for you, Miss L/N.â
âThank you, Dr. Reid.â You said slowly, sensing the undercurrent of his words.
Ethan opened his mouth to protest, but Spencer cut him off with a glance so sharp it left no room for argument.
Later that evening, Spencerâs restraint finally snapped.
You stayed behind after the mixer to gather your things, only to find him waiting for you outside the building. The night air was cool, but the tension between you burned hot.
âYou didnât have to wait.â You said, pulling your jacket tighter around you.
âI wanted to.â He replied, his voice low and steady.
You walked in silence for a moment, the quiet punctuated by the rhythmic click of your heels against the pavement.
âWhy do you do it?â He asked suddenly.
âDo what?â
âLet him follow you around like that. Laugh at his jokes. Entertain his attention.â
You stopped in your tracks, turning to face him. âEthanâs my classmate. I donât see how thatâs any of your concern.â
âIt is my concern.â He said, stepping closer. âYou donât see the way he looks at you. The way he talks to you.â
âAnd how do you look at me, Dr. Reid?â The question slipped out before you could stop it, your voice trembling.
His breath hitched, his carefully constructed walls beginning to crumble. âYou know how I look at you,â he murmured, his voice thick with emotion. âYouâve known all along.â
The admission hung in the air, dangerous and electrifying. You stared at him, your heart pounding as he took another step closer, his presence overwhelming.
âThis canât happen.â He said, though his words lacked conviction.
âThen why are you here?â
He didnât answer, but the intensity in his gaze spoke volumes. His hand twitched at his side, as if he was fighting the urge to reach for you. The distance between you felt razor-thin, and for the first time, you wondered who would break first.
The silence stretched between you, taut and electrifying. Spencerâs jaw tightened, and his hand briefly raked through his hairâa telltale sign of his internal struggle. He was balancing on the edge of control, teetering between his professionalism and the unrelenting pull you had on him.
âYou should go home.â He finally said, his voice low but strained, as if forcing the words out against his own desires.
You didnât move. Instead, you tilted your head, studying him with a boldness that matched his intensity. âIs that what you want?â
His sharp intake of breath gave him away. âWhat I want doesnât matter.â He said, but his eyes betrayed him, dark with longing.
You stepped closer, drawn to the crack in his carefully curated armor. âIt matters to me.â
âDonât.â He warned, but the word lacked strength, a faint plea wrapped in desperation.
You hesitated, caught between the thrill of provoking him and the awareness of the risk you were taking. Still, the magnetic pull between you was undeniable. âIf you really wanted me to stop, you wouldnât be here right now.â
Spencerâs restraint snapped, just for a moment. He reached out, his hand hovering near your arm before he jerked it back as if burned. His expression twisted in frustration, his usual composure unraveling.
âYou think this is a game?â He hissed, his voice harsh. âYou donât understand what youâre doing.â
âIâm not the only one doing it,â you shot back, emboldened by the fire in his eyes. âYou canât stand it when anyone else gets too close to me. Admit it.â
His silence was deafening, his jaw clenched so tightly you could see the faint twitch in his cheek.
âI see the way you look at me,â you continued, your voice softer now, almost coaxing. âItâs not just admiration, Dr. Reid. Itâs something more.â
âYou donât know what youâre talking about.â He muttered, turning away, but you caught the tremble in his voice.
âThen prove me wrong.â You challenged.
Spencer turned back to you, and this time, there was no mistaking the raw emotion in his gaze. âYou want the truth?â He said, his voice dangerously soft.
You nodded, your pulse quickening.
âI think about you more than I should. I notice every detailâevery time you laugh, every time you tuck your hair behind your ear. And when I see him talking to you...â He broke off, shaking his head. âIt takes everything in me not to...â
âNot to what?â You pressed, your heart pounding.
His lips parted, but he seemed to catch himself, stepping back as if the space between you might restore his self-control. âNot to cross a line I canât uncrossâŠâ He finally said, his tone heavy with regret.
But the heat in his gaze told a different storyâa story of a man on the verge of losing himself to the very thing heâd been trying to resist.
The tension between you didnât dissipate. If anything, it grew, seeping into every interaction like an unstoppable tide.
In class, his gaze lingered on you longer than was appropriate, his voice faltering slightly when he called on you. During office hours, his questions delved deeper, as if searching for something he couldnât articulate.
But it was during a casual seminar that the cracks in his professionalism began to widen.
You had arrived early, taking a seat in the front row. As you flipped through your notes, Spencer entered the room, his eyes immediately seeking you out. He paused, visibly unsettled, before making his way to the podium.
As other students filtered in, Ethan arrived and, to your surprise, took the seat beside you. He leaned in, his tone light and teasing as he made some comment about the seminar topic.
Spencerâs expression darkened. He began the session, but his usual measured tone was tinged with an edge that made the room feel heavier. His eyes kept drifting to where you sat, his words sharper whenever he addressed you or Ethan.
When the seminar ended, Spencer was quick to dismiss the class.Â
The classroom emptied, leaving the two of you alone. Spencer stood behind the podium, his hands gripping its edges.
âWhat was that?â He asked, his voice tight.
âWhat was what?â You replied, feigning innocence.
âYou know exactly what I mean.â His gaze pinned you in place. âHim. Sitting next to you. Acting like heââ He broke off, shaking his head as if trying to compose himself.
âActing like what?â You pressed, stepping closer.
âLike he has the right to your attention,â Spencer snapped, his professionalism unraveling further. âHe doesnât. Not the way I...â
He stopped himself, his chest rising and falling with restrained emotion.
âNot the way you what?â You asked softly, your voice carrying a mix of curiosity and challenge.
His eyes burned with an intensity that made your breath catch. For a moment, you thought he might close the distance between you, shattering the boundaries heâd been clinging to.
Instead, he exhaled shakily and stepped back, running a hand through his hair. âThis needs to stop.â He muttered, though the words seemed directed more at himself than at you.
But even as he said it, the tension between you was palpable, an invisible thread pulling you closer despite the chaos it threatened to unleash.
The air between you felt suffocating, charged with a tension that had been building for weeks. Spencer stood before you, his normally composed demeanor unraveling with every passing second. His hands clenched into fists at his sides, his jaw tight as he tried to steady his breathing.
âIâve tried,â he said, his voice barely above a whisper. âIâve tried to keep this professional. To keep my distance. But you...â He looked at you then, his gaze piercing and raw. âYou make it impossible.â
Your heart pounded in your chest, a mix of exhilaration and fear coursing through your veins. âWhat are you saying?â You asked, your voice trembling.
âIâm saying that I canât pretend anymore,â he admitted, his voice low and filled with something dark and desperate. âEvery time I see you with him, every time I see you smile at someone else... I canât stand it.â
You took a step closer, emboldened by the vulnerability in his confession. âThen donât pretend.â
Spencerâs eyes darkened, his restraint crumbling as he closed the distance between you in an instant. His hands cupped your face, his touch firm but reverent, as though heâd been starving for this moment.
âYou donât know what youâre doing to meâŠâ He murmured, his voice shaky with need.
âThen show me.â you whispered, your breath ghosting against his lips.
That was all it took. Spencerâs mouth claimed yours in a kiss that was as fierce as it was desperate. His hands tangled in your hair, pulling you closer as though he needed you to breathe. The kiss was everythingâpent-up frustration, unspoken desire, and a need that had been simmering beneath the surface for far too long.
When he finally pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, his breath ragged. âThis is wrong.â He muttered, though his hands still gripped your waist, unwilling to let you go.
âWe donât have to tell anyone.â You countered, your voice soft but insistent.
Spencerâs eyes searched yours, and for a moment, you thought he might pull away. But then his resolve broke entirely. His lips found yours again, this time slower, more deliberate. It wasnât just a kissâit was a claiming, a declaration that you were his, consequences be damned.
Without a word, he guided you backward until you felt the edge of his desk against your hips. His hands roamed your sides, skimming over your curves with a possessiveness that sent shivers down your spine.
âYou donât know how long Iâve wanted this,â he admitted between kisses, his voice hoarse. âHow many nights Iâve stayed awake, thinking about you. How hard itâs been to stay professional when all I want is to make you mine.â
âThen stop holding back.â You urged, your fingers clutching at his shirt as though afraid he might pull away.
Spencerâs response was immediate. His hands gripped your thighs, lifting you onto the desk with ease. His touch was everywhereâyour hips, your back, your neckâeach movement filled with a hunger that bordered on obsession.
âTell me you want this.â He said, his voice low and commanding as his lips brushed against your ear.
âI want this,â you breathed, your hands tangling in his hair. âI want you.â
His eyes locked onto yours, dark and intense. âYou have me,â he promised, his voice rough with emotion. âYouâve always had me.â
In that moment, the world outside ceased to exist. There were no rules, no boundariesâonly the two of you, finally giving in to the undeniable pull that had been drawing you together all along.
He is the first to break the silence, his voice low and husky.
"Tell me what you want."
You hesitate for a moment, the words stuck in your throat. Then, quietly, you say, "I want you, Spencer."
He moves closer, his gaze never leaving yours. "Tell me exactly what you want."
You swallow, feeling your heart rate quicken. "I want you to touch me, Spencer."
"Where do you want me to touch you?" He murmurs.
"Everywhere." You whisper, leaning into his touch.
He traces his fingers down your neck, his touch featherlight. "Here?"
You nod, your breath hitching as his fingers ghost over your collarbone.
He moves his hands down further, trailing his fingers across your chest. "I need words, sweet girl."
"Yes," You breathe, feeling your arousal growing.
He hums in approval, hands moving lower still, caressing the curve of your breasts. "And here?"
"YesâŠ" You repeat, arching into his touch.
He cups your breasts through your shirt, squeezing gently. "What about here?"
"PleaseâŠ" You whimper, your voice barely audible.
He leans in, his lips brushing against your ear. "What else do you want, Y/N? Tell me."
You can feel your face flushing, but you can't stop the words from tumbling out of your mouth. "I want you to take my clothes off, Spencer. I want you to touch me everywhere."
He lets out a soft groan, his hands moving to unbutton your shirt. "God, Y/N. I've wanted you for so long."
Your shirt falls to the floor, leaving you exposed. His eyes roam over your body, hungrily taking in every inch of bare skin.
"You're so fucking beautiful." He murmurs, his fingers tracing patterns across your stomach.
You gasp as he leans in and presses a kiss to your neck, his tongue darting out to taste your skin. His hands move lower, dipping below the waistband of your jeans.
"SpencerâŠ" You moan, your hips bucking against his touch.
"Yeah, baby? What is it, sweet girl? Tell me what you need." He breathes, his fingers dancing along your inner thigh.
"I need you." You whimper, desperate for more contact.
He pulls away from you, his hands moving to undo his belt. He pulls his pants down, his hard cock springing free. Tip flushed pink, the same shade as his swollen kiss-bruised lips. He grabs your hips and lifts you onto the desk, his body pressed against yours.
"Is this what you want?" He asks, his voice rough with desire.
"Yes." You gasp, wrapping your legs around his waist.
He pushes his cock against your entrance, his eyes locked on yours. "Say it, Y/N. Say you want me."
"I want you, Spencer." You moan, feeling him slide into you.
"Fuck, Y/N," he groans, thrusting into you. "You're so tight."
You cling to him, your nails digging into his back as he drives into you, again and again.
"Feels sâgood." You babble, feeling the tip of his cock deep in your cervix, his hand coming down to rub calculated circles on your clit.
Spencer was a man of logic, of knowledge. But nothing could have prepared you for how skillful his hands could be in such a sinful context, hands youâd spent hours marking into the pages of your notebooks.
He fucks you harder, his pace frantic. "Such a pretty pussy, Y/N." He groans, dipping his head into your neck to nip at your skin.âMy pretty pussy.â He delivers a quick slap to your pussy, sending a shock of pleasure through you, clit throbbing painfully.
"Oh, god, SpencerâŠ" You cry, your orgasm quickly approaching, unable to stop it no matter how much you want to prolong the feeling.
âYou wanna cum for me, baby? Cum all over my cock?â He stares down at you with a look you know will be ingrained in your mind for as long as you breathe.
It doesnât take long before your orgasm crashes over you, pulsing through you in waves, back arching off the bed as you reach out for anything to ground yourself. Hands finding the back of his head, pulling him into your chest.Â
He follows soon after, his cock pulsing inside you as he empties himself into you, collapsing on top of you, his chest heaving.
You look up at him, your eyes bright with satisfaction. "Do you think it was worth it?"
He smiles, stroking your hair. "Iâd do it all again if it meant I could have you this way just one more time."
The first rays of dawn filtered through the blinds of Spencerâs apartment, casting faint golden stripes across the room. You stirred slightly in his arms, your body cocooned in the warmth of his embrace. Spencer had always been a light sleeper, but he hadnât moved all night. His arms remained securely around you, as if even in sleep, he was afraid to let go.
For a moment, the world was still, the only sound was the gentle hum of the city waking up outside. In the quiet, you allowed yourself to revel in the stolen tranquility. These moments were fleeting, preciousâtime you carved out in secret, hidden from the eyes of the world.
âYouâre awake.â He murmured, his voice low and rough with sleep.
You tilted your head back to look at him, a smile tugging at your lips. âSo are you.â
âI donât think I slept much,â he admitted, his fingers brushing idly along your arm. âItâs hard to sleep when I know every moment with you has to be hidden.â
You frowned slightly, guilt tugging at you. âI hate it too,â you said softly. âI hate that we have to pretend in class, that I canât just... be with you without worrying who might see.â
His hand tilted your chin up, forcing you to meet his eyes. They were warm, but behind the softness lay a steel determination. âItâs not forever,â he promised. âThe semester is almost over. Once youâre no longer my student, no one can question us. No one can tell me itâs wrong to feel this way about you.â
You leaned into his touch, comforted by his words but still anxious about the risks. âDo you ever think about what would happen if someone found out?â
âEvery day,â he admitted without hesitation. âBut I think about losing you more. And thatâs a risk I canât take.â
The weight of his confession settled over you, heavy and grounding. You reached for his hand, lacing your fingers with his. âIâd risk it all for you, Spencer. You know that, right?â
He nodded, his expression softening as he brought your hand to his lips, pressing a gentle kiss to your knuckles. âI know. And Iâd do the same for you. But until itâs safe, we have to be careful.â
The reminder of the outside world, of the boundaries you had to navigate, was sobering. Yet it didnât dampen the connection between you. If anything, it strengthened your resolve.
Days in class were an intricate dance of restraint and subtlety. You sat in your usual spot, taking notes diligently as Spencer lectured at the front of the room. His demeanor was calm, professional, every word deliberate. To the untrained eye, he was simply your professor, and you, his attentive student.
But beneath the surface, every glance, every fleeting moment of eye contact held a world of unspoken words. When he paused to scan the room, his gaze lingered on you a fraction too long. When he walked past your desk, the faintest brush of his presence sent a shiver down your spine.
After class, you remained behind under the pretense of asking a question. The other students filed out, their chatter fading as the door closed behind them.
Spencer glanced at you, his professional mask slipping slightly as he leaned against the desk. âIs this about the assignment?â He asked, his tone neutral but his eyes betraying a flicker of warmth.
âNo,â you admitted, lowering your voice. âI just... I wanted to see you.â
His lips curved into the faintest hint of a smile, and he nodded toward the door. âWait for me outside. Iâll finish here and meet you in the library.â
The library had become your haven, a place where the worldâs watchful eyes couldnât reach you. Tucked away in the farthest corner, surrounded by shelves of dusty books, you found refuge in each otherâs company.
Spencer sat across from you, his hand resting lightly over yours on the table. âYou know,â he said quietly, his voice barely audible over the hum of the library, âthis hiding... itâs maddening. But thereâs something exhilarating about it too.â
You raised a brow, your lips quirking into a teasing smile. âOh? Dr. Reid enjoys breaking the rules?â
A low chuckle escaped him, his fingers brushing against yours. ïżœïżœWhen it comes to you? Iâll break every rule there is.â
The weight of his words settled over you, and for a moment, you simply looked at him, your heart swelling with a mix of love and longing. âOne more month,â you whispered. âThen no more hiding.â
âOne more month,â he echoed, his voice filled with quiet determination. âAnd then Iâll make sure everyone knows youâre mine.â
Until then, you would continue this delicate balancing act, cherishing the stolen moments and weathering the secrecy together. Because in the end, he was worth it. And you knew that no matter how many rules you had to break, how many boundaries you had to navigate, you would never let him go.
Ëââ§ê°á â à»ê± â§âË
#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid#spencer reid smut#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid fic#spencer reid smut x reader#criminal minds x reader#bau x reader#reaction
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I just want to say this piece of work lit something in me. I sobbed for 10 minutes at the way this fic pulled at my soul. Literally threw it across a river for me to retrieve like a damn dogâŠoh and I did. It was amazingly detailed and written. I felt every emotion in this writing and I canât wait to read more!!!đ«¶đ»đ«¶đ»đ«¶đ»
(P.s. I loved when you mentioned the fact that Logan had no visible scars and hers came back, Iâm being so serious when my immediate thought was, âSHES CARRYING HIS SCARS FOR HIM SINCE HE REGENERATES!!â thatâs when the sobs hit bad!)
âepiphanyâ | 21k
worst!logan howlett x f!reader

SUMMARY: Superheroes and mutants werenât enough. Noâthe universe had to throw in soulmates who share scars. Fantastic, right? Except yours had vanished, only to mysteriously reappear with the arrival of a new face: the âWorstâ Logan Howlett, fresh from another earth.
OR What happens when a hopeless romantic crosses paths with the ultimate soulmate skeptic?
WARNINGS/TAGS: mdni smut 18+ strangers to lovers. drinking. cursing. slow burn. angst. pining. mentions of alcohol. fluff. reflecting on the art of writing/poems/books. dual POV. takes place after the events of âdeadpool & wolverineâ. TW: multiple descriptions of scars. worst/variant!logan. implied age gap (readerâs in her late 20s). theyâre both touch starved. wadeâs everyoneâs friend. miscommunication/misunderstandings. oral sex (f and m receiving). fingering, grinding. some slight hair pulling. unprotected p in v, creampie. sex with feelings.
A/N: HOPELESS ROMANTICS RISE! here we go again with another long ass fic. this is a soulmates AU in which you get your soulmateâs scars. if you feel triggered by this topic, please refrain from reading. i had a lot of fun writing this even though it took me a while to get it done. thanks to @lubdubology for being my beta and allowing me to share my work with you. and also thanks to @brushworth for giving me the chance to write this. having said this, enjoy the story! iâd love to know your thoughts on it <3
Love giveth and love taketh away.
To this day, itâs still hard for you to wrap your head around the fact that love is what humans both strive and die for.
If it werenât for love, you wouldnât be here. No one would, actually. Human beings are the result of billions of people who loved each other just enoughâor at least long enough to bring life into the world.
But isnât it in the name of love that people act in bad faith? Why would something so pure be used in vain?
You donât get it, but as the years go by, you slowly come to terms with the idea that perhaps you never will. Not because there isnât a reason, but because youâre in love with the idea of love.
How could you not be? Itâs on the streets, on the bus, at work. Everywhere you go, every place you attempt to set foot in, there it is. Love is dressed up in an expensive silk robe, a ribbon tied neatly on top of it. You reach closer, trying to unravel it, though it's pointless. The moment love sees youâtruly sees your longing for itâit flees, and you struggle to keep up.
Love runs faster than anyone, hiding within the bushes, counting the seconds until its next appearance.
It had always been a relentless race, your only worry being to catch it before time ran out. But with each day that passed, the finish line only stretched further and further away. Now, they all blur together, to the point where you live and breathe on autopilot.Â
In a Jane Austen novel, youâd be considered a lone woman. That character whoâs nice, and kind, and loved by some, but not in the way she yearns for. Every time sheâs mentioned, you go âOh, the poor girl,â until the slow realization dawns.
In reality, sheâs you, and itâs you who you feel sorry for, not a fictional character. You.
All in all, love giveth. And love also taketh away.Â
Love maketh you miserable.
Soulmatesâa nine-letter word that holds so much meaning.
Itâs one of those words that you learn early in your life, one you hear at home or on the TV. Your parents never fail to mention it if given the chance. The first time youâre introduced to the topic is at school when you're older, a bit more self-conscious, and no longer preoccupied with picking your nose.
âEverybody has a soulmate. And no,â your teacher had added after a pause, already anticipating the inevitable questions from any curious 10-year-old, âthere isnât such a thing as not having one. We all do. You just have to search for them.â
Back then, that had been your favorite gameâalways keeping an eye open, scanning the crowd more than once in new places. You knew for sure that more than one person probably thought youâd strained your neck from all the times you glanced over your shoulder.
It must be pretty obvious now, the fact that youâreâwell, alone. Saying âwithout a companionâ sounds quite outdated. They canât see through you, but something in the way you walk or speak must give it away.Â
Or is it the fact that you always ask for a table for one?
âAre you expecting someone else?â A waitress approaches you, her tone gentle as she makes sure youâre on your own. A small notebook dangles from her slender fingers, and your eyes catch the name stitched onto her apron: Emily.
The response you give her is on the verge of sounding automatic, robotic even, like one of those prerecorded messages busy people leave on their phones. âNo. Just me.â
She nods, and you feel the sympathy in her gaze. Youâve mastered the art of recognizing that lookâthe one hovering between concern and pity.
Of course, people rarely voice it, but theyâll never know their eyes sometimes say more than they think.
As she jots down your order, youâre met with the ring on her left hand. Very pretty, very shiny. Very expensive as well. Your attention must linger on it a little too long, because she catches you staring, making you feel exposed.
Emilyâyou decide to call her that way from now on, because once you know her name, it feels odd to address her as the waitressâoffers you a shy smile.
âIâm getting married next month,â she blurts out, happiness radiating from her pores. Her eyes glint like two lanterns in a starless night. She also looks younger than you, and the abrupt silence forces you to pinch your wrist, a reminder of the fact that this is a conversation, and not just something you're overhearing.
âCongratulations,â you manage to reply, returning the smile. If she saw how your expression faltered the second she walked away, you wonder if sheâd still think you were so amiable.
Sometimes, your façade slipsâyou canât help it. Thatâs what the âhopelessâ in âhopeless romanticâ stands for.
Some minutes later, she comes back with your coffee, and you catch another glimpse of the ring as it twinkles in front of you. Envy doesnât suit you, so you shift your focus.
Taking out your laptop, you scroll through the latest headlines. This is your attempt at acting more like an adult and less like a girl in her mid-twenties who has no clue what sheâs doing.
One article stands out from the rest: Hollywood Actress Divorces Loving Husband of 25 Years to Pursue Presumed Soulmate. âI saw his scars and knew he was the one.â
Interesting. You canât help but feel sorry for the displaced husband, though.
âGood for you,â you mutter under your breath, clicking the link to read more. Thereâs a picture of the actress and her new boyfriend that makes you stop dead in your tracks: theyâre smiling at each other, their faces close, noses almost touching, while they show off their matching scarsâthe unmistakable sign that theyâre, in fact, soulmates.
Soulmates, superheroes, mutants. It all sounds like a whole lot, doesnât it? Overwhelming, to say the least. One thingâs for sureâyouâll never get bored in this world.
But, hey! Donât forget that there are multiple universes out there. Maybe in one of them, youâre not this pathetic.
Why are you being so hard on yourself? Thatâs not even the point. Shaking your head, you keep glancing at their scarsâtheyâre identical, perfect mirrors of one another. The kind of scars that only two destined souls share.
Their happiness is evident, tangible. You can feel it by just eyeing the image. Itâs a bitter sensation that metamorphoses into a warmth, which heavily spreads through your chest, filling up every empty space it finds.Â
To say you understand that feeling would be a downright lie. And you may be many things, but a pathological liar is not one of them.
As if on cue, you duck your head, rolling up the sleeves of your jacket. You do the same with your shirt, foolishly hoping to find something other than smooth, unmarked skin.
No scars. No marks. No sign of a soulmate, of a lover. In the world you inhabitâthis universe full of the most inexplicable thingsâyouâre alone.Â
Without a second thought, you pack your things, shoving them rapidly into your bag. The cafe feels too little and too large all at once, the walls closing on you.
The rest of the customers are looking at you. Fuck, they already noticed itâyou canât escape it.
Have they? Do you think they see you like you see yourself? The lone woman who writes poems for an addressee who will never read them?
In silence, you hand Emily the money for your coffee. You fear that if you open your mouth, a cry will come out, and thatâs the last thing you need today. She gives you that look againâpity laced with sorrow, the one you despise. It burns.
At that moment, a man walks in, passing right by you. You see his face, his green eyes, and the way his lips curl into a grin as he greets Emily.
The scar on her forehead, which you'd missed before, mirrors the one on his.
They are soulmates.Â
Itâs on the streets, on the bus, at work. Everywhere you go, every place you attempt to set foot in, there it is.
She wishes you a nice morning as you leave the cafe. Little does she know youâll spend the rest of the day locked in your apartment, mourning someone you never even met.
Until the day you lost them, you wore your scars with pride.
They were scattered across your stomach, back, chest, and even your legs and arms. Some were shallow, others deep. It never occurred to youâthe thought that they belonged in the shadows, hidden.
Everyone has them, you thought as you stood in front of the mirror, running your fingers along their jagged paths. I just seem to have more than most people.
Over the years, you might have changed your hairstyle or the way you dressed, but your scars never didâtheyâd always been there, and they were yours.
Partly yours, of course, since you knew they belonged to your soulmate as well.
The older you grew, the more you realized having a good memory was both a gift and a curse. You still remembered that moment so vividlyâwhen you found out that somebody out there was meant for you and only you.
A point of no return, thatâs what itâd been. From that day on, not a single one went by without you imagining the first encounter with your Prince Charming.Â
In the meantime, you dated. A few boyfriends came and went during and after high school, mostly as practice for the real thing, youâd told yourself.
God, you were determined to know everything. To be the best girlfriend ever, so that when you finally met him, heâd be over the moon.
At the age of seventeen, it sounded like a brilliant plan.
You never knew how, but your life became that meantime. All your friends began to find their soulmates: in the supermarket, while traveling, at the goddamn doctorâs office.
Everybody was fulfilling the purpose youâd been taught humans were made forâeveryone but you.
The scars multiplied, yet he was nowhere to be seen, remaining out of reach. Your soulmateâs whereabouts were a mystery. What the hell does he do in his free time? was something you used to often ponder. Is he suffering? Does he need help?
âBe patient, give it some time. The less you seek, the more youâll find,â your mother would say, trying to sound encouraging. Although she was trying to do her best, that phrase alone had the power to make you go nuts.
Be patient? Waiting was all youâd been doing. What was so wrong with you that he seemed to be hiding from you? You didnât want to wait any longer, noâyou wanted to find him. If it meant traveling to Italy like your cousin had to meet her husband, then so fucking be it.
Many nights, sleep eluded you. Lying wide awake, staring at the ceiling, youâd imagine what life with him would be like. What he would look like. You were certain that no matter his appearance, youâd think he was beautiful.
Wasnât that the whole point of soulmatesâthat the bond you two shared transcended physical attraction?
Nevertheless, you secretly wished heâd have brown hair. He didnât need to know, but you had a weakness for brunettes.
On the night of your twenty-second birthday, you were getting ready for the big event when every trace of your scars disappeared.
The bathroom mirror was fogged from the showerâs stream, and as you wiped it clean with the palm of your hand, the image you saw reflected on the glass made your stomach do a flip.
There were no scars. No marks. Nothing. At first, you thought your eyes were playing tricks on youâit couldnât be. Scars didnât just vanish. It was impossible.
But as you lowered your gaze, tracing your limbs again and again, the truth hit you. The marks you knew by heart, the ones that reminded you, Heâs out there, somewhere, were gone.
You felt it deep in your chest, too. Every sound seemed louder and clearer: the blood rushing through your veins, each shaky breath you took. Where are they? Your fingers dug into your flesh, intending to ground yourself.
Is he⊠dead? It was the only reasonable explanation, the rule youâd known all along. Youâd read it countless times, memorizing the principles about scars.
The scream that tore from your throat brought your mother running upstairs, and she entered the bathroom with a horrified expression on her face.
âWhatâs wrong? Are you hurt?â she asked, but your mind was already far away. Your whole body shuddered in her arms, a sob slipping past your lips as you crumbled to the floor, desperately hoping it was all a nightmare. âIt must be a mistake, honey. Iâm sure heâs okay.â
But heâs not, you wanted to tell her. The words, however, never formedâonly a broken whimper escaped your lips. Isnât that what we were taught? Our scars belong to our soulmates; they bind us to them in a way that simple words canât explain.
It goes deeper than the skin. It delves into our bodies, our minds, reaching into the very essence of who we are. What was once his is also mine, but theyâre gone.
Heâs gone. He must be, because otherwise, how would you explain this void?
When oneâs soulmate passes away, that person will notice the disappearance of their scars. The physical marks that once symbolized their connection fade, leaving no trace. This absence is accompanied by a distinct, unsettling sensationâan awareness of loss that goes beyond the physical, signaling the end of the bond.
A part of you died with him that day.
The first time you exchanged words with Wade Wilson, you thought he was a total dick.
It wasnât as if you didnât know himânot when he was so infamous for that mouth of his. Deadpool: the self-proclaimed superhero with a vocabulary that was 90% profanity, who made cracking jokes while fighting the bad guys look easy.
Super funny? Sure. But not exactly your cup of tea when all you wanted was to crawl into bed and forget the world existed.
He was apparently long retired from superheroing. No one had seen that red, sex-toy-looking suit in ages, which was why you were only mildly surprised as you spotted him hauling boxes into your building on a Tuesday afternoon.
It was late, and you werenât in the mood for small talk. Heâd been there barely a week, yet somehow, heâd already managed to fuck things up.Â
You let out a deep sigh, rubbing the crease between your brows. âLook, Wallyââ
âItâs pronounced Wade,â he corrected you, trying to edge his face further into the gap between the door and its frame, though you didnât let your guard down. âYouâre pretty rude, you know that?â
âIâve been up for twenty-four hours, and I need to sleep,â you groaned, trying to push him away with one hand. Technically, he wasnât even asking for something that complicatedâhe wanted to use your microwave to heat his dinner, since his had decided to stop working out of the blue.
The thing was that youâd had the kind of week that felt like a one-way trip to hell, an important detail he wasnât aware of. âGo ask someone else. I canât do charity tonight.â
âYouâre the only one who answered,â he said, pressing his palms together in a pleading gesture, his lips curling into a heartbreaking pout. âPlease, my lovely neighbor, whose name I donât know. You wouldnât want me to starve to death, would you?
âI thought you couldnât die.â You raised an eyebrow, half-interested.
Wadeâs arms dropped to his sides, his eyes drifting downward. âAnd I thought kindness wasnât extinct, but here we are.â He spun on his heel, acting defeated and dragging his feet like a scolded puppy. âCanât believe this is what the worldâs come to. Iâm sure the Bible says something about treating others how youâd want to be treated.â
Why. Just⊠why? Some cosmic, divine force from beyond might have been testing you that night.
âWait,â you croaked just as he was about to step into his apartmentâwhich was literally three meters from yours. His face lit up, expecting you to continue, and you moved aside slightly, signaling him in. âFive minutes and youâre out, okay? I really need to get some rest.â
The rest was history. Wade was just standing there, mesmerized by your microwave as if heâd never seen one before.
You could only hear the faint buzzing sound of the gadget, punctuated by the rhythmic drumming of his fingers on the counter. He was humming a tune while shaking his head to the beat.
You tried to focus, replaying the guided meditation you sometimes followed to sleep in your mind.
Allow yourself to feel the stillness of this moment. Notice your breath slowing as your body begins to calm. Be the observer of your breath, flowing in and out naturally, as your lungsâ
Yeah, it wasnât working.
âPlease, stop it,â you eventually told Wade, whose gaze shifted from the microwave to you, brows furrowed.
âAnd whyâs that?â
âThey say itâs bad for your eyes,â you explained, recalling a half-forgotten news report youâd heard on the TV. Whether it was a myth or not, youâd never know. âI believe itâs because of the radiation exposure.â
Leaning back on the counter, he crossed his arms over his chest. âAt this point, I think Iâm safe. You, on the other hand⊠maybe not so much,â he nearly whispered that last part, and your desire to strangle him grew stronger.
Save me, mindfulness, you thought to yourself.
He jerked his thumb toward the pile of papers and books you had on your kitchen table. âSo, youâre a writer?âÂ
âEditor, in reality,â you snapped, your eyelids twitching as you watched him leaf through your stuff. âWade, donât touch my things.â
âSorry, canât help myself. Iâm very curious.â Flashing you a quick grin, he opened your notebook, squinting his eyes as he went through the pages. âBut you write too, huh? Iâm discovering plenty of material here.â
The bastard. âGive. It. Back,â you snarled, lunging at him and trying to snatch the notebook from his hands, but he was faster, raising it out of reach. âI hope your food explodes in that microwave, asshole.â
âOh, right. I forgot about it,â he snorted, tossing the notebook onto the couch and retrieving his dinner instead. You stared at him in disbelief, opening your mouth to scold him, but nothing came out. Then, there he was, standing in front of you with his plate and a fork.
Wait. Was that your fork?
âItâs hot, Iâll give you that.â He blew on his food to cool it down, and as he glanced up, he was met with your murderous glare. âWhoa. Want some? You couldâve just asked me. No need to get so angry.â
Calling it a desire to kill him wouldâve been an understatement. And the worst part? He couldnât die. âYouâve got what you needed. Now, can you leave?â
âHow longâs it been since you talked to another human being?â
You blinked, feeling the sudden urge to look around, half expecting a hidden camera. âWhy do you always answer with another question?â
âAll Iâm saying is Iâve been meaning to talk to you for days now, but youâre practically living the hermit life,â he said between bites of chicken, excusing himself briefly to chew. âThat robe youâre wearing? Itâs had the same stain on it since I moved in. Also, your doormatâs buried under a mountain of newspapers, so either you really love trees, or youâve been avoiding any sort of social interaction.â
If he had been wrong, you wouldâve felt much better. But he⊠wasnât, and it sucked.
âI feel like I should be scared,â you mumbled after a long stretch of silence, your eyes going round.
Wade did no more than laugh at your troubled expression. âScared of me? Thatâs cute. Iâm a nice guy, sweet pea. Persistent, sure, but Iâve got a knack for getting under peopleâs skin,â he said, grinning through a mouthful of foodâwhich, for the sake of your sanity, you chose to ignore.
After he had finished eating, he let the fork fall into the sink, the metal striking against the surface with a piercing echo, making you jump. He stretched his arms with a satisfied yawn, and he seemed determined to leave you alone. âWell, Iâve done my good deed for the day.â
âWhat do you mean?â you asked, following his movements as he ambled toward the door. âAre you telling me your microwave does work?â
âOh, youâre a smart one, arenât you?â Wade patted your head, ruffling your hair like you were a puppy who had just learned a new trick. âGood night, peanut.â
From that moment on, the two of you became inseparable. Your personalities clicked in a way youâd never experienced before with any other friend. Wade was loyal to a fault, and he treated you like the little sister he had never had.Â
Most importantly, he didnât pity youâhe saw you for who you were, not just someone marked by a lost soulmate. You never told him how much that meant to you, but deep down, you were grateful.
Which brings you to the present day. Youâve been friends with him for over a year, and heâs taken every chance to introduce you to his âweird but lovableâ (his words, not yours) group of friends.
âCheck your social anxiety at the door, thank you,â heâd tell you every time he hosted a get-together and you were invited.
Somehow, you had managed to bond with themâespecially Althea, his elderly roommate, who occasionally forgets who you are despite living next door.
âRemind me of your name again, sweetie? All this disco dust must be affecting my memory,â sheâd ask, leaning in close so youâd practically have to shout it into her ear. Then sheâd nod, smirking knowingly. âAh, yes. I thought so. Just making sure.â
Sheâs quite the character. A real sweetheart if you leave aside the number of times sheâs offered you more types of drugs than you knew existed.
Tonight, youâre throwing Wade a surprise birthday party. Among all the party tasks, youâve handled the decorations and the cake. The roomâs a riot of color, with balloons floating lazily from the ceiling and a cascade of streamers draping over the furniture.
Guests start arriving, greeting you warmly, a feeling you once thought impossible. Theyâre Wadeâs friends, sure, but on some level, you like to think theyâre your friends now too: Vanessa, Dopinder, Buck, Shatterstar, Colossus, Negasonic Teenage Warhead, and Yukio.
As you hear footsteps approaching the door, Wadeâs voice filters through the hallway. Panicking, you whirl around to the group. âHeâs here! Everyone shut up!â you whisper urgently, turning off the lights and pressing your back flat against the wall next to the door.
Seconds later, the sound of keys jingling fills the air as both Wade and Peter step into the apartment.
You flip the lights back on just as Dopinder pops his much-anticipated party popper. âSurprise!â you all scream in unison, and Wadeâs face splits into a grin, unsure of whom to hug first.
âYou guys are lucky Iâm not armed,â he quips, slinging an arm around Dopinderâs shoulders. âSix years ago, youâd all be dead!â
And you giggle, because⊠well, what else are you supposed to do?
As you expected, the night unfolds smoothly. Youâre having fun, engaging in conversations despite yesterdayâs emotional meltdown at the cafe. Itâll be okayâit always is. The food is amazing, the company even better. You remind yourself that romantic love isnât the only kind that mattersâthatâs what friends are for, after all, to teach you that lesson.
The low hum of chatter fills the air, punctuated by bursts of laughter and the clinking of glasses, creating a lively symphony that wraps around you like a warm blanket. Yukio calls your name, waving her head in front of your eyes, trying to snap you out of your thoughts. âEverything okay?â she wonders, concern flickering in her voice.
âYeah, Iâm fine,â you reply, tightening your grip on your beer bottle. âJust thinking, thatâs all.â
You all gather around the cake when Wadeâs about to blow the candles. You know heâs preparing himself for a speech. âAnother year of spinning around the moon, huh?â
âSun, you dumbass,â Al corrects him, and you have to bite your lip to keep your laughter to yourself.
âOkay, flat-earther,â Wade shoots back, giving her a playful side-eye. âAnyway, where was I? Oh, rightâI canât thank you all enough for being here. These past few years have been... well, rough on me, to say the least,â he says, glancing down at the cake with a small, crooked smile. âBut Iâm happy now. Weâve got each otherâs back, like a team!â
âLike The Avengers, you mean?â Dopinder pipes up, eyes sparkling with excitement. Thereâs a moment of silence in which you swear youâd be able to hear a hairpin drop.
Itâs still a sensitive topic.
âNext time, give me a trigger warning before you mention them,â Wade mutters in a hushed tone, and Dopinder shrinks sheepishly. âI guess what I wanted to tell you wasâŠâ he trails off, his palm covering the place where his heart is, âthat I'm glad youâre all here. Being surrounded by the people I love most is the best birthday gift ever.â
His words stir something inside you. Vanessa gently nudges his arm, smiling up at him. âWhy donât you make your wish?â
Wade dramatically drops to his knees in front of the cake, eyes fluttering shut before blowing out the candles, whistles and cheers erupting all around.
Just then, you hear the unmistakable sound of the doorbell ringing through the air. You exchange a curious glance with Wade, raising your eyebrows. âThatâs weird. Want me to get it?â
âNah, I got it,â he says, excusing himself to answer the door. He slips outside, shutting it behind him, and everything returns to normal. For a while, you assume heâs chatting with someone who dropped by to say hiâbut that doesnât really make sense.
âDonât you think itâs weird that heâs been out there so long?â Vanessa inquires, her worry starting to creep in.
âIâll go check on him,â you tell her, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze before heading to the door.
But when you open it, thereâs no Wade in sight. Just⊠his toupeeâor âhair systemâ as he insists on calling it, lying on the floor.
Kneeling down, you gingerly pick it up, a strange sensation settling in your chest.
Where the hell did he go?
After his existence went downhill, Logan turned to prayer.
Completely out of character, right? He thought so too. The number of times he'd stepped foot inside a church could be counted on one hand, so why would a man like him resort to religion?
In the past, he had been told he was part of Godâs plan, but somewhere along the way, he felt like he had become Godâs mistake.
After living a life plagued with loss and constantly in hiding, he wasnât shocked that his self-worth was in the gutter.
Things only spiraled after letting everyone down, especially after that particular day when things took a turn for the worse. He had prayed, asking God to make him forget.
When that didnât work, he just drank harder and smoked more. But not even drowning in alcohol and clouds of nicotine could put an end to his strugglesâhe was condemned to suffer.
In spite of everyoneâs wishes, heâs still going strong, stuck with no defined purpose. Itâs almost impossible not to fall into a routine that seeks to numb him, to put him under anesthesiaâwaking up after passing out who-knows-where, finding the nearest bar, sinking into whiskey and the haze of ashtrays.
Then he does it all over again, a never-ending cycle. His self-destructive habits donât lead him to oblivion; instead, they intensify every sensation, making each memory and emotion painfully vivid.Â
Day after day, he convinces himself heâs got it under control. Logan may be tough as fuck, and he may heal faster than anyone else, but his pride is in pieces.
No amount of strength or supernatural abilities can stop the decay he feels inside, the slow rot creeping deeper within him the longer he remains trapped in this life.
He slams the empty glass onto the counter with a heavy thud, tapping two fingers against it. âAgain,â he murmurs, his voice low and rough.
The bartender looks at him like he's the reincarnation of all things vile. âI told youâyouâre not welcome here. Youâre not welcome anywhere. Now get the fuck out of my bar.â
Oh, yes. Music to his ears. If he had a nickel for every time he heard that, heâd be rich. âJust give me one more drink and then Iâll leave.â
âThatâs not how it works,â the bartender replies, and Logan knows heâs screwed. Another public establishment heâs been banned fromâfucking perfect.
Will there ever be a day where heâs not treated like garbage?
âIt does now,â an unknown voice joins the conversation, and Logan glances to his side, arching a brow. The masked man doesnât let his stare falter. âLeave the bottle.â
âDo I know you, bub?âÂ
âYou donât, but I know you.â
This serves as evidence of how pliant heâs become. Years ago, he wouldâve already wiped the floor with this guy. They didnât call him Logan âshort fuseâ Howlett for nothing. But now? He just canât bring himself to do it.
âEverybody does. Iâm theââ
Here it comes, the reminder of his personal calvary.
ââWolverine.â Once he finishes the sentence, his words taste bitter. Perhaps itâs the venom on his tongue, or maybe itâs just the alcohol from yesterday kicking him again. Either way, both hit hard.
âYes, you are,â the stranger says, continuing to stare at him, as if Loganâs worth the effort. âAnd Iâm going to need you to come with me. Right now.â
Logan holds his breath. The worst part of it all is that his dayâs just getting started. He has no clue who this guy is or why heâs claiming to need him.
But heâs got the wrong manâLogan doesnât know him, and he sure as hell doesnât have anything good to offer.
Or so he believed five minutes ago. Life seems to have its own way of surprising him.
Knowing heâll regret it later, he closes his fingers around the whiskey bottle, chugging the liquor until darkness takes over his senses.
Nighty-night, Logan.
I'm aware that you're not mine, and nor will you ever be.
Iâve spent sleepless nights trying to figure out
where this need to call you mine stems from.Â
You're like an antique, a rare piece displayed
in a crowded bazaar, drawing curious glances.
Iâm aware that you're not mine
because I haven't bought you yet;
I hold no claim over you,
nor can I control who touches you and who doesn't.
I want you to be mine,
but no amount of money would buy your soul.
You're beyond reachâsomeone has already marked you.
Iâm aware that youâre not mine,Â
and I guess maybe thatâs how life is meant to be.
âBullshit,â you mutter softly into the quiet of your apartment, where the only sound is the echo of your own voice.
Chewing the end of your pen, your eyes narrow as they skim over the poem youâd written over a month ago.
Since then, youâve been working on refining the details, but something is missingâthat you can feel. The flow is awkward, the choice of words stiff. Itâs like a puzzle that doesnât quite fit together.Â
You take a long sip from your coffee, tucking both knees up onto the chair you're sitting in. 7:30 a.m., and already, your mind is spinning, diving headfirst into a poem when countless other things are demanding your attentionâlike, a hundred things, really.
Right now, cracking this piece feels more important than any other task on your list.
Who do you write to? That part is easyâyour soulmate. That deceased, probably buried, long-gone soulmate of yours.
It shouldnât be funny, but thereâs an absurdity to it.
Without warning, a memory slips into your thoughtsâone girl you used to work with once advising you to change the subject of your writing.
âYou should go for some self-love crap. People usually eat that up,â she said, not even bothering to look up from her nails, red polish smeared over the edges.
Her fingers were a mess, coated in that fiery hue, but she didnât seem to care as she tapped your notebook with her lacquered index finger. âThis is repetitive. Keep writing about the same thing, and people will get bored of you.â
âI havenât published them yet,â you answered, your voice coming out more high-pitched than usual, betraying the doubt you intended to suppress. Her blue eyes flicked up, studying your face as you slid the now red-stained notebook back into your bag, away from her careless, messy fingers. âI thought⊠I thought we were supposed to write about what we feel passionate about.â
That managed to catch her attention. Passionate. She let out a laughâsharp and cold, like something straight out of a villainâs script in a childrenâs movie. It grated against your ears.
âSweetie, you call that passionate?â She waved her hand dismissively, standing up from the table.
Taller, older, and more secureâjust the fact that she gave you her time shouldâve made you feel grateful. âNot to be a bitch, but what you showed me is kind of depressing.âÂ
Kind of depressing. From that moment on, you kind of hated her. Small victories, thoughâthe agency fired her a year later. You like to think you kind of won that battle.
Still, she mightâve been right about one thing: your writing does fall into patterns. Itâs predictable, to say the leastâthe rhythm, the themes. Even the metaphors you include can be found in several of your poems.
Are you⊠lazy? Has someone revealed the way to break out of it? If there is, you figure you're fine without it.
You donât want to write the kind of articles sheâd churn out about the latest trends or the five best positions to get pregnant faster. Nor do you want to pick apart celebrities' lives for a flashy headline.
What you do want is to write about love. Real love. Even if you are not the most qualified person to do it. Even if nobody wants to read the words from someone who has never experienced it in the flesh.
And youâll get thereâhow? Youâre still figuring that out.
As long as you live and breathe, love will remain in your thoughts, haunting youâespecially with your muse being the fleeting dream of a soulmate you never got to meet in the first place.
But itâs time to start your dayâthe real one. The one where you have to step outside the safety of your four walls and deal with reality.
The to-do list assembles in your mind: groceries, that book youâve been meaning to pick up, emails you need to answer.
You let your mind take over, guiding you through the motions without a second thought. As you head back to your room, you get rid of the comfortable robe you love so much.
Next, your shirt comes off, tossed carelessly onto the bed. Just as you're about to step out of your pajama pants, you notice them.
The scars.
Theyâre not the same, not the faded lines etched into your skin that you could see every night behind your eyelids. New marks glow against your flesh, each one a map of something you donât yet understand, standing out like new brushstrokes on an old canvas.
You canât help but freeze, your breath faltering for a moment, and you nearly trip over yourself. Kicking your pants to the side, you stare down at your hips, thighs, the hollow of your ribcage.Â
Tentatively, you press your fingers into the lines, expecting them to fade, to disappear under your touch like some peculiar illusion.
But they donât. They remain. You can feel the raised edges, the subtle roughness, the heat beneath your touch.
These scars are different from the ones you had before. Under no circumstances are they the faint memories you once carried. Noâthese are fresh and vibrant. Marks that shouldnât exist, the stories theyâve witnessed unfamiliar to you.
Within seconds, youâre sobbing, and you blink through the wetness clouding your vision, wiping your tears of disbelief (and maybe hope?) away with the back of your hand.
Nothing changes. Theyâre still there.
You've never heard of scars returning like this. It goes against everything in the manual on your shelf. Scars vanish when a soulmate dies, but they donât come back. Not like this. And they certainly donât change.Â
Barely able to stand without stumbling, you scramble to your phone. The first person you call is your mom, your fingers shaking as you press the buttons. She screams into the phone, and all you can do is laugh through the tears.
What doesnât sit right with her is the change in the scars. She mentions something about reaching out to a specialist, insisting that your case is rareâone in a million.
Almost immediately, you think of Wade, knowing heâd want to hear this. God, heâd be ecstatic. Before you even realize it, youâre standing in front of his door, finger hovering over the bell.
Thatâs when the realization hits you: heâs been gone for nearly three days, off doing whatever it is he does.
Ringing the bell, a smile tugs at your lips. News like these are meant to be shared.
âAlthea, itâs me!â you call out, hoping sheâll hear you. You press your forehead against the door, fidgeting with your fingers. âI have something to tell you.â
Logan has had better days. Days that didnât involve escaping The Void, fighting a hundred Wades, or saving an earth that wasnât even his to begin with.
You know, normal daysâof being sneered at while drinking to forget and, fuck, how many hours has he been sober? It feels like an eternity.
When the adrenaline wears off and the heroism fades, heâs back to being just Logan again. If he had a watch, heâd probably tap the glass and fake impatience to Wade, pretending heâs got somewhere else to be.
He should leave. Thatâs his first impulse: to escape before itâs too late, but a question arises in his mind: does he truly want to?
Wade watches as Logan rises to his feet, planning to walk away. Pretty stupid, Logan thinks, considering he knows no one else in this universeâapart from the scarred man heâs become friends with against his will.
âLogan!â Wade yells his name, his voice light but firm enough to halt him in his tracks. Logan turns to face him, greeted by Wadeâs familiar, infuriating smile.
It's a silent invitation to a new beginning.
Nothingâs holding him back, so why not accept it? The odds of being the target of hateful glares are lower here, and thatâs reason enough for Logan to give a small tilt of his head and return to the bench where Wade remains seated.
âWeâre gonna be roommates!â the latter exclaims, a wide grin stretching across his face as they head toward the building. âCan you imagine all the fun weâll have?â
Logan presses his lips into a thin line. âLooking forward to it,â he murmurs, a small glimmer of sarcasm slipping into his tone, although Wade takes his words at face value.
âMe too, roomie. Me too.â
âLetâs not use that word.â
Wade holds the door open for Logan with an exaggerated bow. âWhy not? Itâs the truth. We can even share my bed if thatâsââ
The sound of Loganâs claws succeeds in silencing him. Wade recoils and covers his crotch, no doubt remembering past close calls.
âYou know what? You can have the bed. Iâll take the couch. No problem.â
Was moving in with Wade the worst idea heâs had in a while? Absolutely. The reason? Althea, the elderly woman he lives with, isnât answering the door, and he doesnât have his keys.
Logan covers his eyes with a hand, silently questioning all of his life choices. And itâs only been ten minutes.
âThis doesnât happen often,â Wade reassures him, rubbing his neck.
âHard to believe,â Logan mutters, some unknown muscle in his jaw beginning to ache from how hard heâs gritting his teeth. âYou just leave the house without your fucking keys?â
Wade huffs, jutting out a hip in mock offense. âThose TVA guys didnât exactly send a âWeâre here to ruin your dayâ memo. I was ambushed, okay?â he retorts, keeping a finger glued to the doorbell, its shrill ring gnawing at Loganâs already thin patience. âAl, I swear to God, Iâm replacing your blood pressure pills with laxatives if you donât wake up!â
âHow old is she?â Logan asks, searching for anything to keep him from snapping the other manâs neck. Peaceful thoughts.
âCompared to you, sheâs basically a newborn,â Wade replies, rocking back and forth on his heels. Heâs having the time of his lifeâmeanwhile, Loganâs self-control is reaching its limit.
His claws twitch in his knuckles. Heâs had enough, and with a jerk of his left hand, they gleam as they slide out, ready to break the damn door.Â
But then Wade jumps in front of him.
âWhoa, whoa, whoa. Easy there, buddy! Iâm not letting you turn my door into a strainer.â
âMove,â Logan barks, not an ounce of friendliness in his tone. His stare is flat, unfazed.
âIâd rather not. You canât just go around breaking peopleâs doors, man. Not cool,â Wade blurts quickly, placing both hands on Loganâs chest, pushing him away. âHow about I ask my neighbor, huh? I gave her a spare set of keys for situations like these.â
âI thought you said this didnât happen often.â
âWell, lifeâs full of disappointments.â
Before Logan can answer back, Wade rushes to the door next to his, slamming his fist on it like a madman, his finger hammering the doorbell simultaneously.
The devilâs orchestraâa symphony straight from hell.
Logan grabs Wadeâs wrist before he can knock again, hissing: âHave some manners, will you?âÂ
Wade tries to shake his arm free from Loganâs tight grip. âSheâs in there. I know it,â he replies in the same tone, but now he uses his other hand to ring the doorbell with greater feeling.
After a pause, he stamps his foot on the floor, throwing his head back. âCome on! Is this how you treat me after being away? Shame on you, Missy!â
This neighbor must be very patient, Logan thinks, to keep up with a guy like Wade without often seeing red.
As the door finally swings open, his grip on Wade loosens, and his hand falls limply to his side.
âWhat⊠the fuck?â
The sound of your voiceâsoft, slightly groggy from sleepâpulls his attention away from the door incident. His gaze is fixed entirely on youâyou look as if youâve just rolled out of bed, which makes sense since itâs still early.
Back in The Void, Wade had rambled on about all his friends, you included. Logan recalls how he had described you: a book editor who lived on her own and loved reading. You were youngerâbut then again, who wasnât younger than him?
The picture Wade had shown him, with you standing in the background, hadnât done you justice. He had found you attractive then, but seeing you in person?
Youâre⊠far more than he expected.
More beautiful, for starters.
Fuck. Why is he even thinking about that? He mustâve been staring at you for quite a whileâyou glance at him like a startled lamb, clearly feeling self-conscious under his unwavering stare.
âMay I know,â you start, tightening your robe, âwhy you were banging on my door like that? I thought I was getting robbed for a minute.â You direct your question at Wade, avoiding Loganâs presence, which makes something tighten in his chest.
He finds the way you stifle a yawn endearing, though.
Okay, thatâs enough, he tells his mind. Let it go.
Wade steps in first, dropping his mask on the nearest surface. âHello, my dear. Oh, yes, Iâm fine. Just a few scratches. No, I wasnât partyingâI was kidnapped. Thanks for asking.â
You draw in a long breath, rubbing your eyes to wake up once and for all, and then you proceed to gesture for Logan to enter. Even now, you find it difficult to maintain eye contact with him. âDo youâwould you like to come in?â
Not only are you pretty, but also polite. He nods, muttering a gruff: âYeah, thank you.â
As he walks past you, your shoulders brush briefly, sending an unexpected jolt through him. A tingling sensation on the verge of being electrifying that has him knitting his brows.
His gaze finds yours, searching your expression to see if you felt it too. But you look away, closing the door to go after Wade.
Great. You must think heâs a weirdo.Â
âIâm always up for company, but why so early?â you ask your friend, rummaging through the kitchen cabinets. âAnd are you going to tell me what happened the other day? You left without saying anything.â
Wade hops onto a stool at the kitchen counter, swinging his legs like a child. âYou know Al. When it comes to sleeping, sheâs like a much older version of Sleeping Beauty,â he replies with a grin, snatching the mug you were about to use for your morning coffee. âThanks, youâre such a doll.â
âThat wasâmine,â you sigh, hitting him in the thigh, and Wade winces with a fake whine. âI donât think Iâve missed you that much. Go back to being missing in action,â you say, grabbing another mug and filling it before raising it toward Logan. âCoffee?â
Logan hesitates. Youâre treating him like youâve known him for years, not minutes. âIâm⊠good.â
âYou sure? I made it fresh, just before you guys arrived.â
âDonât worry, Iâmââ
âI love the chemistry here,â Wade interrupts your conversation, drawing your attention back to him, âbut you still got the keys I gave you, right?â
You roll your eyes, blowing on your steamy coffee before answering. âI do, but I want answers first. And I want them now.â
Twenty minutes and a rambling, half-coherent story later, your drink has gone cold, and Loganâs patience is wearing thin⊠again.
Will he survive sleeping under the same roof as Wade? Stay tuned for more.
âAnd then I told Paradox âHe has risen, babygirlâââ
âI think youâre being too specific,â Logan interjects, noting how youâre staring into space with wide eyes. âShe seems confused.â
âI am,â you admit, rubbing your temples. He doesnât blame you: Wadeâs a terrible storyteller. You offer him a weak smile as you turn to him. âSo⊠youâre from another universe.â
âLast time I checked.â His back collapses against the couch, groaning softly. He sits beside you, and the way your eyes sweep over him, taking in his disheveled and sweaty appearance, doesnât go unnoticed by him.
âAnd how is it? I mean, do you haveââ
âIâm public enemy number one.â
Too harsh, idiot.
âOh. Thatâs⊠good to know.â
Wade says your name, and you look to your right, lifting your brows. âDo you mind if I grab the keys myself? I need a shower. Iâve been marinating in sweat and blood for way too long.â
You grimace, pointing toward your room. âTop drawer of my nightstand.â
With that, he embarks on a quest to find them, leaving Logan alone with you. Silence stretches between you two.
He doesnât know what to say, or if he should even say anything. Casual conversation isnât his forte.
âYou and WadeâŠ?â
Letting out a giggle, you lean back on the couch. âGod, no. Weâre just friends,â you explain, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. For a fleeting moment, your eyes bore into his, and then you return to burning holes in the floor. âIâm single. Havenât found my soulmate yet.â
Itâs his turn to chuckle nowâa dark, humorless sound rumbling in his chest. You chew on a cuticle, Loganâs gesture igniting a sense of curiosity in you.
âWhat?â you ask him, puzzled.
âDo you really believe in that? Soulmates who share scars?â If he were to think carefully, heâd watch his tone. Itâs too late, anywayâyou straighten your posture, your face contorting with each passing second. âI can tell you do.â
âAnd I can tell you donât.â
âWhy would I? Those are lies,â he retorts, the corners of his mouth turning upward.
His opinion is anything but objective, totally biased, given that every time he dove into loveâs arms, he was met with the crude reality: not everyoneâs meant to be loved, himself included.
The look you give him is enough to wipe the smirk off his face.Â
âSoulmates exist, Logan. We all have one.â Thereâs a certainty in your tone, marked by the subtle way in which you say his name, that he finds alluring. He shouldnât, especially when you seem angry above all.Â
âAnd where is yours, then?â
He regrets it as soon as the words leave his mouth. Your expression becomes inscrutable. You could be either disappointed, frustrated, or even exasperatedâsad, perhaps?
Logan feels as though a weight has settled on his shoulders just from staring into your eyes.
You strike back with silence. Plain, pure, dreadful silence that has him wondering if heâs breathing properly.
At long last, Wade comes back from his expedition, keys dangling from his fingers. âIt was quite the treasure hunt, you know? Youâve got a lot of garbage in there.â He sticks his face between Loganâs and yours when you don't answer him. âGuys, is there something wrong? Are you doing a staring contest? If so, can I join?â
âI need to start getting ready for work,â you announce, standing up from the couch. Logan mimics you, and you open the door, your fingers curling around the knob. âYou should get going. And Wade,â you pause, acknowledging only him, âI need to talk to you later. In private.â
Without Logan. Thatâs what you wanted to say but didnât.
âSure, my queen. I live to serve,â Wade says in rejoinder, and he kisses your forehead briefly, which forces Logan to avert his gaze the whole time his lips are on you, feeling uncomfortable watching. âTake care, alright?âÂ
You give Wade a small nod, waiting until heâs outside your apartment to glance at Logan.
âGoodbye,â you croak, and he knows he should say something, that heâ
The door almost closes on his nose.
Had he been an asshole? He was merely expressing his thoughts. The idea of soulmates didnât sit well with him.
Once settled into Wadeâs apartment, Logan steps into the shower, water rinsing off his body. Yet he finds himself unable to stop thinking about you.
The disappointment in your eyes when he asked about your soulmate.
The coldness in your tone at the end, so different from the warmth you initially offered.
He feels drawn to you, as if some sort of invisible string is tying the two of you. Were it possible, he would use his own claws to cut it, but he canât discern where it begins or ends. Instead, he prefers to blame his touch-starved state for this reaction.Â
Heâs already hating this earth. So much for a man whose skin refuses to scar.
And where is yours, then?
His words shouldnât have stung the way they did. All the charmâthe gruff exterior, the mysterious personalityâhad vanished.
The guy from another universe, with the claws, the healing abilities, and the raspy voice, is a moron.
A ridiculously good-looking moron? Yes, but a moron nonetheless.
There is something about him you canât quite place. A chill creeps down your spine as you replay the instant your eyes first locked. Your body had reacted in ways it never had before, drawn to him like metal to a magnet.
Why? Youâd seen handsome men before, even been with some. Yet, youâve never felt thisâthis gravitational pull, this inexplicable pull to invade someoneâs personal space.
How would your soulmate feel if he saw you like this, lusting after another man?
You shudder at the thought. This isnât like you. You pride yourself on loyaltyâperhaps a little too much. You donât read two books at the same time, and youâve been buying the same brand of shampoo for the past five years.
So why now? Why him? It feels like a betrayal of your own mind, your conscience turned against you.
Let things stay as they areâitâs safer that way. You donât want to know the reason behind this forceful need.
After all, being his grumpy and ill-tempered self, heâll stay holed up in Wadeâs apartment, avoiding any interaction with the real world. And you? Youâll forget about him. Easy-peasy.
That afternoon, as you take a nap on the couch, he invades your dreams. Itâs not even a wet dream, but heâs there, staking a claim on a part of you he has no right to.
You wake up with your hand clutching your chest, a frustrated punch landing on the nearest cushion.
The next day, you drop by Wadeâs place for a quick visit, your eyes darting around the room every few seconds, half-expecting Logan to appear out of nowhere.
âI told you, heâs sleeping. That guyâs got a fucked up sleep schedule,â Wade says, urging you to take a seat beside him at the table. âWhy donât you wanna see him?â
Because heâs messing with your sanity. Your brain cells are practically disintegrating at the mere thought of breathing the same air as him.
âI justâI need to tell you something.â
âAre you pregnant?â
âWhat? Wade, no! Youâve been gone for three daysâpregnancies take months.â
âIâd make an amazing uncle, though.â He grabs your hand between his, his eyes sparkling with mischief. âBabies are so adorable at thatââ
âMy scars are back,â you cut him off, putting an end to his nonsense. Pulling the neck of your sweater to the side, you show him the thin lines etched into your collarbone. âBut they are different this time.â
âDifferent? You mean they changed?â His disbelief is clear as he reaches for your arm, frowning while he inspects more of your scars. Wadeâs jaw slackens, color draining out of his face. âFuck. Fuck!â
âFuck?â
âYeah, fuck!â His strong arms envelop you, and you lean into the embrace, resting your cheek against his shoulder. âIs this good news? Are we happy? Does this mean I have a shot at becoming an uncle after all?â
You laugh a little at his eagerness, rubbing gentle circles into his back. âI am happy. I justâI donât know what these changes mean yet.â
Althea steps out of the bathroom, her cane tapping the floor in rhythmic beats. âI already told you what they mean.â
Wade pulls away from you, glaring at her. âYou meddler! Havenât we talked about not eavesdropping? Hasnât life taught you anything after all these decades?â
âUpside of being blind: Iâve never seen this motherfucker in Crocs,â she says, pointing her cane at you, though you know her aim is Wade. âDownside of being blind: I hear everything in this apartment. And you, kid, have a new soulmate.â
âI know what we talked about the other day, but... it doesnât make sense, Al. You only get one soulmate,â you protest, feeling the tension grow as you pace around the table. âWhy canât it just be simple? My friends are getting engaged, years are flying by, and Iâm still out here chasing this⊠this idiot who no one can even find!â
Thatâs when Logan appears, emerging from his room, holding several empty beer cans. He rolls his eyes and walks straight into the kitchen. âGreat. Who else is coming tonight?â
Wade smirks, clapping a hand on Loganâs shoulder as he looks at you. âSweetie, Loganâs going through his second puberty at the ripe old age of two hundred. The pediatrician said itâs just hormones, nothing to worry about. Excuse his shitty attitude.â
With a low groan, Logan shrugs off Wadeâs hand, scowling. If anything, the younger manâs grin just grows bigger. âWolvie, I gotta admit that whole âDonât fall in love with me or Iâll break your heartâ personality shouldnât turn me on, but here we are.â
You decide to take that as your cue to leave. You grab your bag, muttering a quick goodbye to Althea as you head for the door.
But Logan calls after you. âCan we talk?â
You freeze, your back to him. âHow much did you hear?â you ask, not daringânot being ableâto meet his gaze.
âAll of it,â he admits after a beat, and you curse under your breath. âBut it doesnâtâHey!â He follows you into the hallway. âIâm talking to you!â
âNo, youâre not.â You fumble for your keys, fingers shaking as you try to unlock your door. âLeave me alone.â
âI wonât,â he mumbles behind you, his voice softer now. âCome on. Donât be so harsh.â
âI canât believe you,â you whisper, finally finding the right key and jiggling it into the lock. The door swings open, and you step into the safety of your apartment. But when you try to close it, Loganâs foot wedges into the gap, blocking it. âGet out.â
He doesnât budge. âNo.â
âLogan, Iâm not in the mood.â
âWell, me neither. But I owe you an apology.â
You wonder if he realizes the hold he has on you. No matter how hard you try to mask it, the unbearable pounding of your heart betrays you.
Scanning his features, you trace the rugged contours of his face with your eyes, lingering on the lines on his foreheadâthe aftermath of what it looks like a life lived through bitterness and pain.
âCan I come in?â he insists, his tone on the verge of sounding pleading.
You hesitate. The sensible part of you screams to send him away. Thinking that avoiding him would be as easy as stealing candy from a baby is a long-forgotten idea now: youâd been naĂŻve to even consider it possible.
Heâs going to find a way to sneak into your space, your homeâand youâll let him in. Youâll grant him a chance to cross a boundary that shouldâve been already drawn.
It feels like youâre fifteen again, infatuated with the guy you know you shouldnât get close to. Paul from high school wasnât your soulmate back thenâLogan isnât now.
The smart thing would be to take a step back, accept his apology, and ask him to leave. Thatâs how you preserve what little remains of your sanity and protect your heart, which is already hanging by a thread.
But God, it feels so good to be near him.
You step aside. He walks in. Something tells you this wonât be the last time.
âIâm waiting.â You stay near the counter, pressing your back against it, and keeping your distance. Logan sits awkwardly on the edge of your couch, unsure of where to begin.
âLook, about what I said yesterdayâŠI didnât mean it. Iâm sorry.â He sounds sincere, earnest. âI didnât know you believed in soulmates.â
âItâs not a matter of believing in them or not, Logan. My soulmate is out thereâyours too.â
Your words coax a grin from him, and he shakes his head. âI guess weâll never see eye to eye on that.â In a fluid motion, he crosses the room, and you find his unexpected proximity a bit exasperating. âDo you forgive me?â
âIâll think about it.â
âGive me a break, darlinâ. Iâm trying my best.â
âWell, you were an asshole.â
âYes.â
âThe first time we exchanged words.â
âAlso yes.â
âAnd now youâre apologizing.â
âPositive. I just did.â
Itâs not that youâre easyâitâs Loganâs persuasive allure that gets to you.
âWhat else can I do to win your forgiveness?â he wonders aloud, his syrupy voice making you tighten your grip on the counter.
An idea sparks in your mind. You move toward the pile of books next to the TV, eyeing the titles, until one catches your attention: your copy of Jane Eyre by Charlotte BrontĂ«, one of the first novels youâd read when you were younger.
Itâs adorned with colorful post-its, and the pages, sort of rough to the touch, are marked with handwritten notes in the margins.
âHow do you feel about reading?â
âNot my strongest suit,â he answers, arching a brow as he takes in your enthusiasm. âWhatâs going on in that head of yours?â
âYou want me to believe youâre sorry for what you said? Then read this,â you say, wiggling the book in front of him, âand we can start over.â
âWhat is it about? Let me guess: love and soulmates. Did I get it right?â he asks, playfulness lacing his tone. His breath hitches as you press the book against his chest, silently urging him to take it. His pinky grazes your hand, feeling your skin and sending a jolt through you.
Logan watches you with half-lidded eyes, and it takes every ounce of willpower to tear yourself away from him and his maddening touch.
You clear your throat. âOpen it to page one hundred fifty-three.â
âDo youâyou remember specific pages?â
âAnd read whatâs underlined in black,â you murmur, eyes fluttering closed for an instant. âPlease.â
Logan must mutter something along the lines of âYouâve got to be kidding meâ before searching for it. Itâs only then that he begins to recite the passage:
He is not to them what he is to me. He is not of their kind. I believe he is of mine; â I am sure he is â I feel akin to him â I understand the language of his countenance and movements; though rank and wealth sever us widely, I have something in my brain and heart, in my blood and nerves, that assimilates me mentally to him. Did I say, a few days since, that I had nothing to do with him but to receive my salary at his hands? Did I forbid myself to think of him in any other light than a paymaster? Blasphemy against nature! Every good, true, vigorous feeling I have gathers impulsively round him. I know I must conceal my sentiments: I must smother hope; I must remember that he cannot care much for me. For when I say that I am of his kind, I do not mean that I have his force to influence, and his spell to attract; I mean only that I have certain tastes and feelings in common with him. I must, then, repeat continually that we are for ever sundered: â and yet, while I breathe and think, I must love him.
Youâve chosen a damn good page.
Logan looks up from the book, his mouth slightly parted, as if heâs about to speak. You interject before he can find the words.
âYouâve got a week to read it.â
âHow long is it again?â
âFour hundred pages.â
He surrenders, sighing in defeat. âYouâre killing me here, yâknow?â
âWrite an opinion essay if possible.â
Right there, Logan offers you a mock laugh. âHaha. Thatâs so funny.â
âIt is for me,â you talk back, unable to hide your smile from him, and soon he mirrors your expression.Â
As Logan steps toward the door, he hesitates and glances back. âWeâre all good then?â
Leaning against the doorframe, you raise your chin defiantly. âWeâll be when you finish the book.â
What he says next has your stomach turning into knots. âYouâre trouble.â His tone shiftsâno longer teasing, but grounded in truth. Gone are the jokes; he seems to mean every word.
For the rest of the night, one line from the book doesnât stop echoing in your mindâthe line about soulmates: I have something in my brain and heart, in my blood and nerves, that assimilates me mentally to him.Â
Youâre trouble for him, and heâs trouble for you. You hope he knows it too.
He thought that not seeing you for a week would snuff out his feelings. That by next Wednesday, every thought tied to your name, every urge to uncover the last of your secrets, would be extinguished.
That's what time usually did: it diminished dangerous desires that couldn't afford to be voiced, and buried those longings that had no place in the light of day.
Logan now figures heâs been underestimating the spell you cast on him with just a few glances and the intensity of your eyes. Heâs seen you animated, angryâboth defiant and vulnerable.
Each of your gestures feels like a memory he canât quite place.
The way you laugh, the right corner of your mouth lifting just slightly higher than the leftâhe swears it isnât the first time he's seen a smile brighter than the sun.
Still, he convinces himself itâs all in his head. He must be the one losing his mind, the years finally catching up to him. Itâs the only reasonable explanation for the thoughts that consume his every waking moment.
Heâs wrongâyouâre right. Heâs seeing things where there are noneâyouâre simply too kind.
Too kind. Too young. Too damn clever for your own good, with your books and that sharp mind of yours. He wonders how you see yourself.
Do you like the reflection in the mirror? Are you content with the way your life has turned out?
Do you, too, lie awake at night, the bed stretching endlessly, aching for a touch that never comes?
The walls in this place are paper-thin. When darkness falls, and the moon rises, the big, scary Wolverine canât close his eyes.
Instead, he listens.
Some nights, you play the same movie on repeatâa romantic comedy that lasts exactly one hundred and twenty minutes. For two hours straight, heâs privy to your laughter, your commentary at the characters on the screen.
He hears you cry when the lead couple drifts apart after a terrible argument, but they always find their way back to each other, and you watch every second until the credits roll.
None of the other films you pick ever ends in heartbreak, he realizes. They all have happy endingsâthe kind you wish for yourself.
One way or another, there must be a way to get you out of his system. He knows, without a doubt, that you wouldnât want him. Heâs not your soulmate, and itâs clear that finding that person has become the center of your existence.
Logan canât allow himself to be the moron who derails your purpose.
Sure, heâs done bad things, but he likes to believe that at least a part of himâsome small fractionâhasnât been lost yet. That thereâs a piece of him that can be saved, which is the reason why he stayed here: to be a better man than the one he was in his universe.
But itâs hard. Harder still because itâs you who disrupts his quest for redemption. How is he supposed to go on with his life when every thought circles back to you? The idea of holding you, kissing youâsleeping beside you haunts him.
And so the images blur, new dreams twisting with his usual nightmares.
Which one is worse, he can no longer tell.
One afternoon, while deliberately steering clear of Jane Eyre, he reluctantly turns to Wade in search of answers. âTell me more about her.â
Wade, lounging on the couch, stops scrolling on his phone and drops it onto his chest, drawing his eyebrows together.
âHer? Who do you mean?â His tone oozes with feigned innocence, barely containing a shit-eating grin when Logan grits out your name, his tone rough, almost pained. âOh, Romeo. Youâve got it bad.â
Intending to maintain some semblance of control, Logan strides into the kitchen, grabbing a glass and the last bottle of whiskey. As he tips it, only a few drops fall into the glass.
âNo, I donât,â he says, extending his arm and holding the bottle up. âWeâre out of whiskey.â
âYou keep saying we, but youâre the only alcoholic in this apartment.â Wade kicks off his shoes, propping his feet on the coffee table. âSo, why the sudden interest in the lady? She getting through that tough exterior of yours? Iâll give her points for that.â
âAnd you wonder why I donât talk to you.â
âI saw the book,â the younger man replies, lacing his fingers behind his head, watching as Logan rummages through the fridge with increasing frustration. âYou never told me you were into classics. If Iâd known, Iâd have gotten you a copy of Pride and Prejudice.â
âShut your mouth.â
âIâm sorry, werenât you the one who came to me, looking for the essential oil of truth?â
The silence that follows is thick and uncomfortable, mood-killing.
âSee what I just did there?â he adds, and Logan feels forced to shake his head from side to side, appearing conflicted. Wade lets out a low huff. âThat was Virginia Woolf. Add her to your reading list.â
âHas anyone ever told you how obnoxious you are?â
âMore times than I can count. Iâm just not everyoneâs cup of coffee.â
âTea, Wade. Not everyoneâs cup of tea.â
âWhatever.â Wade simpers, as though Loganâs correction is the punchline to a joke only he gets. He sets his palms flat on the table, looming closer with a mischievous glint in his eyes. âSo, what would you like to know about my dear friend?â
Logan hesitates, the weight of his question heavy on his tongue. âWhatâs the deal with her scars?â
The air shifts. Wadeâs playful expression fades and he tilts his head, his tone turning serious. âI donât think itâs my story to tell,â he begins, gaze dropping to the floor. âBut she lost them years ago. She was living a normal life, and one day, they were justâgone, like they were never there. It broke her. We didnât know each other back then, but youâve seen her.â
Wadeâs eyes flick back up, while Logan stands there, tongue-tied. âYou even know the kind of books she readsânothing can shake that belief in real love, in soulmates being destined. Imagine how she mustâve felt when she found out her presumed soulmate was dead⊠without a single warning.â
From what he had heard, that sense of loss was impossible to put into words. Those whoâd gone through it described the experience as if half of youâyour body, your soul, your very essenceâwas being ripped away.
The pain was excruciating, and the only way to survive it was by means of tolerating itâno remedy, just the endurance to outlast the agony.
It wasnât just a momentary hurt. It was the kind of torment that lingered, making you question who you were and what little remained of you.
You and Logan had more in common than heâs willing to admit.
âSheâs a good person,â he mutters absent-mindedly, his thumb grazing the cover of the book. He had carried it everywhere for a week now, without even cracking it open.
âOh, you dirty pigâŠâ Wade whispers, his eyes lighting up as if a lightbulb suddenly went off in his mind. âNow I get it. You wanna know her. Like, really know her!â
âI donâtââ
âYour sex life is none of my business. Iâm all up for you putting your mutant dick to work, otherwise itâs just wasted potential. But itâs my friend weâre talking about.â
Loganâs jaw tightens, and he snaps. âDrop the speech, alright? Iâm not trying to get into her pants. I just want to be nice. Thatâs all.â
âNice, huh? Whatâs your version of nice? Starting a two-person book club?â Wade stifles a laugh, pressing a finger to Loganâs chest. âLook, if you want to sleep with her, and the feelingâs mutual, then go for it. Just tell me thisâhow longâs it been since you visited Pussy Village? Was it before or after the Big Bang?â
Things are never truly serious with Wade Wilson. âIâm not answering that.â
Wade raises both hands in surrender, still chuckling. âFine, fine. But if youâre really interested, just be clear about it. She doesnât need a half-assed situationship.â
By now, itâs like a mantra he repeats again and again, hoping that eventually both Wade and he will start to believe it. âI donât want to have sex with her.â
As he heads back to his (now Wadeâs old) room, Wade adds, âIâm sure sheâd appreciate it if you underlined some quotes you like.â
Much to his dismay, thatâs exactly what Logan does.
His handwriting isnât the most legible, but he tries his best, leaving notes in the margins of some pages, such as:
I hate this John kid.
Her aunt is a cunt.
This is too cheesy.
Mr. Rochesterâs married?
St. Johnâwhat a prick.
He finishes the book at 7 a.m. A long-ass bookâjust for you. While getting ready for work, Wade calls him an unemployed fucker, and Logan knows nothing better than to shoot back a similar insult, stretching his arms as the first rays of sunlight creep through the curtains.
Wade was right about something, even if Logan himself doesnât wish to admit it: heâs behaving like a teenagerâstaying up until dawn, practically chained to the bed without daring to go out. Falling for a girl he didnât know a week ago.
Learning to control his impulses has been a hard task, especially with his temperament. Over the years, Logan thought heâd mastered the art of self-restraint, long past the point where his body moved without his mindâs permission.
As his feet carry him down the hall toward your apartment, he recognizes how wrong he is.
This is a terrible idea, he thinks. And yet, his fist knocks on the wood. Three times.
Fuck.
The door opens just a crack. You peek out, your face barely visible, eyes puffy from sleep. âLogan?â
His name isnât a fancy one. Itâs pretty normal, pretty standard. There must be a thousand other guys named like himâyet itâs only when you say it, your voice turning it into something rare and unique, that it feels different, like itâs only his.
The tone you use with him isnât the one heâs used to: Logan, youâre a disappointment. Logan, how dare you turn your back on your friends? Logan, theyâre all dead. Logan, itâs your fault.
Yours is inviting, and warm, and new. He likes new.
âI just finished it,â he answers, holding up the book, mindful not to grip it too tight as not to crumple the pages.
You scratch the back of your head, blinking at him. âYou just finished it⊠at 7 a.m.?
Yeah, it sounds stupid now that you say it out loud, but itâs true. Hoping his reaction is enough to explain what he canât put into words, he gives you a slow nod.
This time, you donât wait for him to say more. âCome in?â
Yes, this is what heâs been looking forward all week. This moment, this interaction.
This Come in. This Yes, thank you. Youâre so kind.
His quiet acceptance of your invitation, the unpronounced thought of I donât deserve this, but I canât back off now, because how could I ever say no to you?
He follows you into the kitchen as you move to make tea. âWant some?â you ask, but he declines the offer. If he were to drink anything right now, it would be something much stronger, not tea, despite the early hour. âYouâre here to talk about the book?â
âWell, you told me I could come back after reading it.â
âI did,â you say, a small smile tugging at your lips as you hide it behind your mug. âI just wasnât expecting you to be so punctual.â
You donât need to know that heâs been counting down the seconds, marking each minute in his mind since the last time he saw you. Thatâs a detail heâll keep to himself. âItâs a good story.â
âTell me about it.â You smile even wider, and he takes a moment to absorb the details of your faceâthe crinkles by your eyes, the way your nose scrunches when youâre amused. âI lent you my most precious book. Fell in love with it years ago.â
âI can see why you liked it,â he explains, flipping through the pages to find the one he marked. âAll the romance and the yearningââ
âHey, itâs also good for other reasons,â you try to defend yourself, but any other argument dies on your lips when he finds the passage he was looking for and begins to read aloud.
âI sometimes have a queer feeling with regard to you, especially when you are near me, as now,â he recites, his voice lower, almost reverent, as he looks up from the page to meet your gaze. âIt is as if I had a string somewhere under my left ribs, tightly and inextricably knotted to a similar string situated in the corresponding quarter of your frame.â
You seem startled by the sharp sound of him closing the book. Heâs sort of breathless, and from where he stands, he can tell you are too. âThatâs one of my favorite passages.â
âI canât blame you for believing in soulmates if this is the kind of thing you read growing up,â he teases, handing the book back to you.
Though a part of him almost wishes he didnât have toâso that it would still be a reason, a tether, pulling him back to you again and again.
Grinning, you take it, your eyes remaining trained on his. âI happen to notice it hasnât changed your perspective on soulmates.â
âItâll take more than a book.â
âThis is, in my opinion, one of the best love stories ever written. How else will I convince you?â
âWhy do you feel like you need to convince me?â He takes a step forwardâyou take a step back. âWhy canât it be the other way around? I might end up being the one who convinces you.â
âYou could never,â you respond, clasping your hands behind your back. âIt would be like convincing me the sky is green instead of blue.â
Logan retreats slightly. âDonât you get tired?â
âOf what?â
âOf waiting. Of always being on the lookout.â
You donât react badly to his question. Youâre not even shaken, not fazed in the slightest. âWhen I meet him, Iâll know all the waiting was worth it.â
âAnd in the meantime?â Logan inquires, pressing himself further into your intimacy, edging closer as if testing the boundaries youâre willing to cross. His words are a subtle request for more, for answers. âWhat will you do until you find him?â
If you ever do, he thinks, but itâs left unsaid, lingering in his thoughts. Heâs getting better at not saying the things that sit heavy in his chest without thinking.
âI think you misunderstand, Logan.â You study him through your lashes, and he feels heâs become the keeper of your most sacred secrets. âItâs not about waiting as if my lifeâs on pause. Iâve been with other people. But in the end, I want to choose him.â
That casual admission strikes him like a wave of cold water. A flicker of jealousy burns at the edges of his composure, though he tries to smother it.
Iâve been with other people, you say, your tone so nonchalant, and yet the mental images that flood his mind are anything but comfortable.
He imagines someone else standing in your kitchen. Perhaps in five minutes, there will be another man knocking on your door, here to discuss a book, and it wonât be him.
Perhaps this isnât rare for youâall this come in, grab something to drink, letâs talk when youâre done reading.
Perhaps heâs not as important as you make him feel.
His thoughts spiral until your voice pulls him back from the brink.
âDonât you understand how beautiful it is?â Thereâs a dazzling glint in your expression, a light in your eyes that makes him ache. âOutside of these four walls, thereâs a person whoâs waiting to meet me, in the same way I expect to meet him. I canât grant myself the choice not to believe in something like this.â
Far from easing the martyr in his mind, this conversation only deepens his internal struggle. The questions overlap each other: what happens if you never find him? Would you ever consider settling for somebody else?
He rephrases that last oneâwould you ever consider being with him?
âHeâs a lucky guy,â Logan murmurs, and just like that, he feels himself slipping deeper, falling into the rabbit hole with you guiding him through the madness.
For a moment, he can pretendâpretend that matching scars and bonds that defy the rules of his principles make sense.
Maybe, just for you, heâll allow himself to believe it.
Your eyes soften with sudden emotion, glistening with the beginnings of tears. He feels the primal urge to reach out, to cup your cheek, to be there when the first tear falls. âYou think so?â you ask, your voice fragile.
I sometimes have a queer feeling with regard to you, especially when you are near me, as now.
âOf course I do,â he replies, his tone quiet but laden with a strange, undeniable truth.
It is as if I had a string somewhere under my left ribs, tightly and inextricably knotted to a similar string situated in the corresponding quarter of your frame.
Whatever this is between youâitâs messed up. Heâs messed up. And you⊠youâre just as tangled in this chaos for indulging it, for looking at him in that way that calls out to him.
The more time he spends with you, the less he feels like himself. Everything heâs done latelyâreading that damn book, standing in your apartment at 7 a.m.ânone of it feels like something heâd do.
Itâs not just his mind youâre messing with: itâs his very sense of self.
Loganâs smart mouth had always been a liability, getting him into trouble either by saying too much or by choosing the wrong words. Bad things had always followed in the wake of his tongue.
Somehow, when it comes to you, heâs the most careful heâs ever been. He doesnât want to upset you, nor does he want to be the cause of any sorrow that might affect your heart.
When the two of you stand at the threshold once more, just as you have other times before, you softly say: âI feel like Iâm experiencing a dĂ©jĂ vu.â
He laughs, because it sounds ridiculous. âCare to explain why?â
âYou come, we talk, you leave.â You lean against the wall, your hand ghosting over the handle. âBut you never stay that long.â
Thereâs no mistaking the layered meaning in your words. You, who work with language and its peculiarities for a living, never speak by chanceâevery phrase, every pause, carries an assigned weight. The double meaning in your statement doesnât escape either of you.
Youâre a natural at this madness, diving headfirst into it. You must be losing it, too, because your actions donât match what you said before.
Slowly, his fingers brush a loose strand of hair behind your ear, the perfect excuse to feel your skin, to close the distance without saying what he actually wants.
They say food and shelter are the basic human needs, but Logan chooses to believe they forgot to include the longing to reach out and just feel you.
âI canât stay,â he finally responds to your earlier comment, his hand still lingering against your skin.
His strengthâthe only thing saving him from completely giving inâhelps him pull himself away.
Before the impulse to kiss you becomes too overwhelming to resist, Logan leaves.
Some time later, youâre making lunch, music playing softly in the background at the same time the cityâs distinct noise finds a way to break through your tranquility.
You rely greatly on the knowledge that youâre good at multitaskingânow more than ever, with a book in one hand and the other stirring the pasta on the stove.
The warmth from the pot rises around you, but you trust yourself not to be careless. Not to be stupid enough to burn yourself with the boiling water.
This time, you miscalculate. Not only do you dip the wooden spoon into the pot, but your fingertips too.
Though it only lasts a second, and the voice in your head instantly screams Hot! Hot! Hot!, the shock makes you drop the book to the floor. You yank your hand back, racing to the sink to run it under cold water.
âFuck,â you grumble, watching the skin redden in protest. âLesson learned: no more multitasking.â
The funny thing is, just a door away, Loganâs watching a movie with Wade when he feels a sting in the tips of his fingers.
Itâs barely there, practically faint, but he looks down, inspecting his hand like it doesnât belong to his own body. His skin briefly flushes with irritation before returning to its normal state.
Wade notices his distraction. âHey, you okay?â
Logan pays no mind to it. âSure. Just felt something strange.â
Is it still called avoiding if youâre both doing it? Youâd like to think so.
For the sake of clarity, letâs say youâve been actively avoiding Logan, but truth be toldâheâs been avoiding you too. That last encounter in your apartment didnât help matters at all.
If anything, it made everything worse.
Youâve been down this road before, knowing men like him too well: theyâre everywhere, until theyâre not.
One day, they vanish without a trace, leaving you staring at the empty space they used to occupy, asking yourself âWhat happened to my Prince Charming in disguise?â
They disappear as though they never existed, and not even the best detective can track them down.
So far, your avoidance strategy has worked wonders. Maybe itâs for the best. Heâs a distractionâan undeniably attractive one, the kind anyone would want to trip over.
Yet you miss him, which is dumb: why are you missing someone you were never supposed to care about in the first place?
You return home after a long trip to the grocery store, arms laden with bags. Itâs the kind of errand that exhausts you, though you keep telling yourself itâs better than thinking about him.
As you struggle to get through the building's exit, you resign yourself to the fact that itâll take several trips to bring everything up to your apartment.
Then the elevator doors slide open, and you drop everything to the floor.
You shouldâve known better than to assume victory so soon. After days of successfully avoiding him, there he is.
And of course, itâs when you look your worstâtired from running around, weighed down by groceries, barely holding it together.
âHey,â he greets you, standing just outside the elevator, like heâs not sure if he should step inside or stay where he is. Heâs dressed in a red-and-black flannel shirt, layered over a white vest, a leather jacket tossed over his shoulders, and a pair of jeans that seem made for him.
He looks... ridiculously good.
âHi,â you manage to answer after a beat, scrambling to collect the bags youâd dropped. âJustâgive me a second.â
âLet me help you,â Logan says, ducking down to gather the groceries, but you pull them away.
âIâve got it. Are you going out? On a date, maybe?â You nod toward his clothes, trying to keep things light, teasing even.
Glancing down at himself, a crease appears between his brows, and in one swoop, he gathers all the bags with a single hand. âIâm supposed to meet Wade at a bar, but heâll survive without me.â
âLogan, you donâtââ
But heâs already moving, one hand tugging you out of the elevator, the other gesturing toward your apartment.
âNot up for debate,â he mutters. Then, without waiting for permission, he holds out his hand. âKeys.â
Sighing, you dig into your pocket and drop them into his open palm. He unlocks the door with practiced ease, stepping inside and placing the bags on your kitchen counter.
As he starts to unpack them, you stop him. âYou really donât need to do that.â
That seems to catch his attention. He pauses, turning toward you with his arms crossed over his chest, leaning against the counter.
His unrelenting stare sizes you up, and he cocks his head to the side. âHavenât seen you in a while.â
He thinks heâs so discreet, so smooth. âWell, Iâve been busy,â you explain, fiddling with the frayed edge of your sweater, tugging at it like it might unravel your nerves.
You hear him click his tongue. âBeen busy too.â His words hang in the air, thickening the atmosphere. Your body tenses, and you stare at his shoes, untilâ âSweetheart,â he calls you softly, and your eyes snap shut for a moment, your chin almost pressing against your chest. âMy eyes are up here.â
A quick flutter of your lashes brings you back to him, and your chest tightens with the effort it takes to look into his eyes. âDonât you have somewhere to be?â you ask, praying heâll let this go.
You watch as his mouth twitches with something halfway between a smile and a smirk. âYou already want me to leave?â
âIf you have plans, then yeah.â
He huffs out a laugh, inhaling a shallow breath like youâve missed something obvious. âWade can wait. Heâll be fine.â His expression shifts, and the playful tone in his voice falls away, replaced by something more raw. âYouâve been avoiding me.â
You canât help but snort. âOh, please. Like you havenât been doing the same.â You walk over to the couch, feeling your legs wobble beneath you. You collapse into one corner, hoping the distance will help you breathe.
Like a shadow, Logan follows after you, sitting far too close. His legs splay wide, so wide theyâre almost grazing yours.
âAt least I have a reason for it. What about you?â His hand reaches out, fingers closing around yours in a grip thatâs both firm and gentle, enhancing your anxiety. Your throat tightens, the room shrinking around you. âI need you to tell me Iâm not crazy,â he says, his voice rough and low. âI need you to tell me you feel it too.â
Panic flares in your chest, and you scramble for time. âI donât know what youâre talking about,â you mutter, but your voice cracks, the uncertainty leaking through the cracks in your bravado.
He doesnât buy your acting. âYou do. We canât keep playing dumb. Youâre gonna make me lose my fuckinâ mind one of these days.â
Itâs not just his wordsâitâs the way he stands so close, heat radiating from his body, the roughness of his hand gripping yours like heâs terrified youâll slip away.
The intensity of it all weighs on you in ways you canât even begin to describe, leaving you breathless, caught between denial and desire.
âLogan, this isnâtââ
âWhat? Okay?â Thereâs a glimpse of mirthlessness in his tone as he speaks, his forehead furrowing. âI canât stay away from you, donât you see it? It feels too good to be wrong,â he utters, inching forward. You know you should take a step back, tell him to stop. Nothing good can come from this. âIt takes two to feel these things. It canât be just me.â
âThat doesnât mean we have to give in.â Blood pounds in your ears, your pulse racing as your heart hammers unpleasantly. Little shivers of ice run through your spine, and yet, your stomach burns with desire.
More than ever, you feel yourself slipping, your sanity at risk.
Logan runs his eyes up and down your face, agitated, almost going cross-eyed. âEarlier you asked if I was going on a date. Would you like that? Me being with other people? Kissing another woman?â His hot breath caresses your cheek, and you avert your gaze momentarily. âAnswer me.â
Donât do it. For the love of God, donât. âI canâtâI donâtââ
âCome on, baby.â
âI donât want you to be with other people,â you mumble, your lips almost grazing his, and thatâs all he needs to grip your chin and pull you into a kiss.
His mouth moves hungrily over yours, pushing you back until the armrest digs into your lower back. A choked whimper gets lost in your throat, and you bring him closer by grabbing onto the lapels of his jacket, your chest pressing against his.
Logan bites down on your lip, soothing the sting with his tongue, and the moan you let out reverberates in the apartment.
âThis is what you were hiding from me?â he rasps, his forehead bumping against yours. âThese sweet sounds you make?â
You end up perched in his lap, your thighs bracketing his hips. Heâs hard beneath you, and as you shift, your center makes contact with his erection through the layers of fabric.
Both of you sigh into each otherâs mouths, your hips moving on their own accord, rocking slightly against his clothed cock. He hooks one of his arms around your waist, guiding your movements.
Everything seems to fall into place. Outside your window, birds chirp. The world feels lighter, like a better place. The beast inside you quiets, and for once, your mind is blissfully blank.
Logic? Error 404ânot found.
You tug at his hair, and Logan growls, breaking the kiss. âDo that again.â He jerks under your touch, bucking up into you. Encouraged, you pull his hair again, fingers wrapping around a strand at the nape of his neck, and youâre rewarded with a deep groan.
Heâs dizzy for it, but youâre no better, not when he trails his kisses down your neck, his mouth latching onto your skin, tasting the sweat and salt.
âI canât control myself around you,â he murmurs, groping your tits, and you wail, the ache between your legs becoming intolerable. His hands slip under your sweater, caressing the scars on your back.
Thatâs when recognition settles over you.
What are you doing? And why are you doing it?
He ceases sucking your flesh when you go rigid on top of him. Pecking your lips once again, Loganâs hands cradle your face, his thumbs rubbing circles on your cheeks. âWhatâs wrong?â
You donât understand how he does it, how he can remain so calm. Doesnât he realize the gravity of this? âWe have to stop.â
âWhy?â
âDonât ask me something you already know the answer to.â
His arms drop to his sides, releasing you from his hold. You push yourself off him, away from the couch, putting as much distance between you as you can.
Pressing your palms to your eyes, you shake your head. âGod, Iâm stupid. This is stupid.â
Your reaction seems to get on his nerves, his frustration somehow increasing. Logan stands, towering over you. âWas it stupid when you were dry humping me?â
âFuck you, Logan.â
âIâm not the bad guy here. You kissed me back.â He doesnât let up, trailing behind you as you try to escape. âYou want me as much as I want you.â
âWill you stop saying that?â you bark, throwing your arms in the air. Your chest rises and falls with rapid breaths. âYeah, we like each other. So? Does that make it right? How can you just ignore how wrong this is?â
His expression hardens, anger flashing in his eyes. âForget your idea of what's good and bad. You're just upset you can't control what you feel.â
âHeâs closer than ever.â
Logan gawks at you, his voice bitter as he goes on with his rambling. âThat fucker again? Donât you ever get tired of talking about someone who you donât even know? Because youâre certainly wearing me out.â
âYou wish you were him, donât you?â You jab your finger into his chest, feeling his heartbeat, a flutter you choose to ignore. âYou want to be my soulmate.â
âDamn right I do,â he practically spits his words, narrowing his eyes at you. âBut Iâm not him.â
âNo. Youâre not.â
Everything seems to fall out of place. Outside your window, birds donât chirpâthey scream for mercy. The world doesnât feel lighter, but heavier. The beast inside you roars back to life, restless and louder than ever, while your mind spins in chaos.
âWe shouldnât see each other anymore.â Your voice pierces through the thick silence in the room, and you swallow down the lump forming in your throat.
âIf thatâs what you want,â he replies, his jaw clenched tight, irritation radiating off him in waves.
âItâs what we both need.â
âSpeak for yourself. I donât have a soulmate.â His tone is biting, but you donât miss the undercurrent of longing in his words. âBut if in any other universe I do, I hope itâs you.â
Your hand turns the knob, and then heâs halfway out the door, sparing you one last glance before he turns his back to you.
No more visits. No more books. No more bruising kisses that leave you questioning your mere existence.
Let things stay as they areâitâs safer that way. You donât want to know the reason behind this forceful need.
After all, being his grumpy and ill-tempered self, heâll stay holed up in Wadeâs apartment, avoiding any interaction with the real world. And you? Youâll forget about him. Easy-peasy.
It didnât go well in the end.
You remember your first heartbreakâseventeen, fresh out of high school. One of your hands clutched a million dreams, and the other, a pillow soaked with your tears.
Your mother remained by your side, caressing your back, attempting to soothe the sobs that racked your body. She murmured that itâd pass, that you wouldnât feel like this forever. You believed her then, and trusted that things would eventually be okay.
Almost ten years later, another heartbreak shouldnât come as a surprise. By now, you thought you wouldâve developed the tools to survive it. You should be able to piece yourself back together by instinct.
But life, as it turns out, has a peculiar way of catching you off guard.
Whether itâs pent-up horniness, touch-starvation, or genuine affectionâit doesn't change the fact that your pseudo-relationship with Logan fell apart.
Though youâre not the one whoâs suffering the most. Neither is Logan.
Wade, the third party in this tangled mess, has somehow taken it the hardest.
âI feel like a child of divorce,â he says, his head resting on your lap, eyes distant as they fixate on the peeling wallpaper. âYou need to do something about that.â
âIâll take care of it next month.â
Heâs supposed to be the one supporting you, but it feels like the roles are reversedâyouâre comforting him, letting him vent.
âMy two favorite people now canât even be in the same room. What are we gonna do for Christmas? New Year's Eve?â Straightening up, he grabs the nearest cushion and buries his face into it to muffle a defeated scream. âDamn it, Cupid! You had one job!â
All in all, Wadeâs emotionally unavailable at the moment, grieving your separation from Logan as if it were his own loss, too caught up in his melodrama to be of any real help.
Meanwhile, you fill your days with work, books, anything to keep your mind occupied.
You go to bed too late, you wake up too early. Sleep too little, cry too much.
One thing stays constantâyou and Logan donât talk. Stolen glances in the hallway, awkward elevator ridesâthose are the only remnants of whatever you once were. Back to being strangers again.Â
Well, not really. Strangers donât know the route to your mouth the way he does.
The ache lingers every day. Missing him when youâre awake is a common occurrence. At night, as you toss and turn beneath the sheets, he stars in your dreams. You canât recall the last time he wasnât lodged in your thoughts.Â
Where there used to be ideas, creativity, and plots worth scribbling down, thereâs now only Loganâa man destined to problematize your stay on earth.
That fucker again? Donât you ever get tired of talking about someone who you donât even know? Because youâre certainly wearing me out.
And yet, despite all of it, you continue to prioritize someone else. Someone who isnât even here. Clung to the idea of a soulmate, you chose him over Logan.
What did he expect? For you to abandon your principles, your belief in destiny? Itâs who you are. Nearly thirty years of life guided by one belief canât just be discarded like trash.
You liked to separate things into categories: good and bad, right and wrong. A simple method to structure everything, to make sense of your world, and it has worked most of the time.
But now? The limits of those sacred categories look blurred. Your judgment feels unreliable, and you wonder if the choices youâve made lately have been the correct ones.
Each of your decisions seems to be leading you further down a path you canât recognize.Â
Whatâs the goal? Finding your soulmate, the voice in your head mockingly answers for the hundredth time, rolling its imaginary eyes. And where is he?
Youâve shut Logan out, a man whoâs made it clear he has feelings for you, for this elusive person. Isnât it time he steps into the light at long last?
This is what you fear the most: loneliness.
You donât want to be the lone woman who sits by herself in a cafe, drawing pity from waitresses who discuss her solitude. By no means do you wish to be that friend who dispenses wise dating advice, but goes home to an empty bed. You refuse to become the godmother whose hand no one holds when her time comes.
No, this canât be all fate has to offer to you. There must be more. If your life were a book, youâd be flipping through the pages to the last chapter, desperate to see how it ends.
Or, better yet, youâd grab a pen and rewrite it yourself. What kind of ending youâll haveâyouâre not so sure about that.
Itâs Sunday, one of those endless weekends where the only way to survive is by rearranging your entire apartment. You could manage it alone, but help would be niceâWadeâs help, to be more precise, would be perfect for this kind of task, and you find yourself knocking on his door.Â
No answer. Deciding to dial his number to see if heâs fallen asleep, you try calling him, waiting through the rings until he finally picks up. âHey.â
Except itâs not Wadeâs voice that answers. âIâm sorry, who is this?â
The door swings open, and Logan appears right behind it, holding Wadeâs phone to his ear.
He narrows his eyes, leaning against the frame, a single eyebrow lifted in curiosity. âHow sad. You donât remember what I sound like.â
You feel foolish for still being on the call, so you lock your phone, ending it. âWhereâs Wade?â you ask, frowning as you hold your breath, your voice sharper than intended.
âOut and about. Didnât tell me where he was going,â Logan replies, glaring at you as he raises the phone to your face. âHe left without this.â
Abort mission! Nodding in agreement, you begin to step back. âGreat, Iâll look for him later.â
Youâre close to being locked up once again in the safety of your apartment when you hear him: âYou need anything?â
Itâs the most heâs said to you in weeks. You hesitate, keeping your back turned. âIâm moving some heavy stuff around. Thought I could use the help.â
âI could do it.â
No. Not really. Heâs doing that thing againâoffering help when you know you shouldnât accept it. You shake your head.
âItâs not necessary,â you say, forcing a casual tone.
âDoesnât have to mean anything,â he retorts, his footsteps heavy and deliberate as they draw closer. With each passing second, your options shrink, leaving you no room for retreat. âDonât worry. I wonât try to kiss you again if thatâs whatâs got you all worked up.â
âIâm not worked up,â you hiss, and he sidesteps you easily, his arm nudging yours.
The electricity is still there, undeniable, but neither of you has the courage to acknowledge it, acting as though itâs an ordinary occurrence.
His eyes roam the room, like heâs forgotten what your apartment looked like. He pauses by the bookshelf, his fingers gliding over the spine of Jane Eyre, and a low whistle escapes him as he slips it back into place.Â
You, frozen at the threshold, feel your irritation simmering just beneath the surface, and the urge to hide in your bedroom only becomes stronger.
After this, youâll have to burn your favorite book. What a pity.
âWhat do you want me to do?â he asks, hooking his fingers into the loops of his jeans, his posture both confident and annoyingly relaxed.
Thereâs a challenge in his tone, and he acts as if youâre the one who pulled him into this situationâlike he didnât worm his way in here.
You gesture toward the couch. âCan you put it by the window?â
He sets to work, moving the smaller pieces of furniture aside to make space for the couch. Under no circumstances are you going to just stand there and watch him sweat.
Instead, you busy yourself with the long-forgotten glasses and cups gathering dust in one of the kitchen cabinets, each one glinting with past disappointments.
Wetting a towel, you start by wiping the rims. The air feels heavily charged with uneasiness, but you're relieved that for once, you can breathe without feeling like youâre on the brink of a heart attack.
You can already imagine Wadeâs face when you tell himâ
âSo,â Loganâs voice cuts through the silence, startling you, âhowâs the search going? Got any luck?â
His words have the desired effect on you, and the glass slips from your grasp, shattering against the floor in a crash that mirrors the jump of your heart. You curse under your breath, stepping back from the mess, taking in the shards sprawled around your shoes.
âBe careful,â he says from the other side of the room, still dragging the furniture into place, and you scrutinize him over your shoulder, your brows knitted.
âI donât need your advice,â you murmur through gritted teeth as you crouch to pick up the larger shards. His attention returns to the couch, but you guess heâs not technically thinking how nice of a person you are.
As you kneel, your hands tremble slightly, and you wonder when that started. You fumble for a larger shard of glass, bracing your hand against the floor for balance, unaware of the smaller piece lying dangerously close to your fingers.
The sting comes fast, slicing through the skin of your pinky. You flinch, raising your hand, and Logan, hearing the faint wince, abandons his task and crosses the room to you.
"I donât need your advice," he echoes, mocking your tone as he squats beside you, his hand closing around yours to inspect the wound. "Youâre bleeding."
âBrilliant observation, Sherlock. I hadnât noticedââ The words die in your throat, your eyes widening as you take a closer look at his hand. âWait, why are you bleeding?â
He snorts, diverting his attention to his own hand. âWhat do you mean Iâmââ Whatever it is he intended to shoot back remains unsaid as both of you stare down at the small cut in his pinky.
Driven by instinct, you place your hands side by side, your finger grazing his. The cuts are identical: same place, same width, same depth. The only difference is his vanishes within seconds, leaving only a few droplets of crimson blood as evidence.
Logan couldnât have cut himself. He was nowhere near the glass. âAre youâŠ?â You swallow thickly, trying to string together a coherent thought, dizziness making its triumphant appearance. âAre you thinking what Iâm thinking?â
âYes.â
âAnd what is thatââ
âI need a drink.â
âCan you stop acting like a dick for one second?â You peer into his glossy eyes, watching him try to avoid your gaze, though he canât seem to resist. âPlease, Logan. Look at me.â
When he does, his mouth parts as if to speak, then closes again. âI donât understand. I thought I didnât have a soulmate.â His gruff tone slows even further, like he's straining to push the words from his lungs. âI thoughtâI thought I was alone.â
It explains so much: how your scars had reappeared once he and Wade returned from The Void.Â
The instant attraction, the yearning to be near him.
The dread that washed over you each time he walked away.
The dreams that plagued your nights, and the tightness in your chest these past few weeks that made you wonder if you could ever coexist in the same space as him without breaking apart.
All those times you felt he was getting closer werenât just a figment of your imaginationâhe was, in fact, right there.
But he wasnât just anyoneâit was him. Logan is your soulmate. You two are meant to be together. How long would it take for you to truly believe it? Until it no longer sounded like something too good to be true?
Without uttering a sound, Logan gazes at you, silently pleading to see them. To see your scars. You extend your arm, and with a gentle motion, he rolls up the sleeve of your shirt, revealing the marks etched into your skin.
He runs his fingers along the lines, trying to understand the bond you now shareâboth his and yours.
In a sense, youâre his. You carry his scars, the physical manifestation of the life he has lived. Even though he may not bear any of his own, you do, and thatâs more than enough.
He belongs to you just as much as you belong to him.
âThere are more,â you tell him. your voice barely above a whisper. He stands, offering you his hand, and you take it, rising to your feet. Logan inches closer, his mouth hovering just above yours, his large hand coming up to cup your cheek.
The look he gives you is one reserved for those he loves, a look filled with such warmth and affection that it almost feels dreamlike.
âDo you want me to see them?â he inquires, and all he needs is a nod from you to gently tug your shirt up your chest and over your head.
He lets out a dry chuckle when you attempt to tame your hair, the effort proving to be in vain. The clock on the wall seems to pause its ticking the moment his fingers begin to trail each of the scars that captures his gaze.
You canât even begin to fathom what thoughts might be swirling in his mind, but if the flicker of lust and desire you catch in his expression is anything to go by, youâre not so worried.
Loganâs touch carries an unexpected softness, a tenderness you never imagined a man like him could possess.
Deep down, you wish he understood that these scars donât hurt, that they never have. âIâm okay,â you reassure him, prompting him to explore more of your skin, to claim you as his.
âDo you⊠like them?â he asks without meeting your eyes.
Do you like my scars? is the real question hidden underneath.
Do you like me? is the one he canât bring himself to pronounce.
âTheyâre yours. I could never not like them.âÂ
Before you stands a man you once believed was meant to be your burden, your trial. Logan had been the earthquake sent to test your endurance, to see how much you could withstand before surrendering and waving the white flag.
The same fingers that once imprinted his mark on you now linger on the strap of your bra, waiting for you to decide whether to let him go further or stop.
Desire has a limit before it overwhelms. Thereâs only so much need a person can contain before it spills over, uncontrollable and raw.
This game, one you never learned how to play, feels as foreign to him as it does to youâneither of you knows the rules.
âCan I see more?â Heâs still talking about the scars, still fumbling with the strap, and you nod, your eyelids growing droopier as you take his free hand and direct it to the front of your jeans.
He catches the hint, undoing the button with ease, allowing you to shed the last layers of restraint.
Bare, moments away from being completely naked, standing in stark contrast to Logan, who remains fully clothed, your stomach does a flip as he rubs his thumb along the sides of your underwear.
Leaning your forehead against his shoulder, you stifle a sigh when he splays his hand across your lower back, pulling you closer.
His rough grip tightens on your ass, testing the feel of you, while your breathing becomes shallow, erratic.
âWhat is it, honey?â He slides his fingers your stomach, just below your belly button, brushing a small scar in there. âWant me to touch you?â
âYes,â you croak, the plea slipping out involuntarily, throwing your arms around his neck. He buries his face against your jaw, his lips parting against your skin, trailing open-mouthed kisses along the curve of your neck.
You tilt your head back, exposing more of your throat to him, breathless as you whisper: âIâve waited so long.â
He moves toward the couch, and you follow, trying to anticipate what heâs got planned for you. âI know, baby. I know. Youâve waited long enough.â Guiding your body down, he has you lying horizontally on the sofa. He unhooks your bra, kneading your breasts with both hands, eliciting a ragged gasp from you. âBut Iâm here now. You donât have to wait any longer,â he huffs by your ear, rolling your nipples between his fingers, his breath mingling with yours, each exhale warm and inviting. âGonna let me make you feel good? Show you how much Iâve been thinkinâ about you?â
Instead of answering with real words, you surge forward, crashing your lips against with his, reveling in the way he cages you with his biceps, locking you up in a prison of desire from which you never wish to break free. He tries not to settle his full weight on top of you, attentive not to crush you.
As he nips at the column of your throat, you squirm beneath him, canting your hips up to seek the friction you crave.
He presses his knee against your center and you push back, grinding against him with an animalistic urgency.
You canât recall ever feeling this desperate, this overwhelmed by a man. But then again, heâs unlike any other youâve encountered in your array of momentary hookups.
His kisses grow even more insistent as breathy moans roll off to your tongue, merging with the occasional creak of the couch beneath your movements.
Logan spreads your thighs wider, sinking to his knees on the floor to tug your lower half forward until your ass is almost hanging in the air. He places your thighs on his shoulders, supporting you as he leans in to pepper your soft flesh with kisses.
One can be certain that heâs marking your inner thighs with a hickey or two, the scratch of his beard feeling magnificent against your sensitive skin, and you can hardly bring yourself to think about the potential burn heâll leave behind. Logan inhales your scent, the tip of his nose dangerously close to your cunt, and you tangle a hand in his hair as he continues to test your patience.
âEager?â he wonders aloud, looking at you through his lashes. While maintaining eye contact, he presses a kiss to your clit through the fabric of your panties.
He does it again, and you bite your lip hard enough to draw blood, his fingers deftly pulling your underwear down your legs.
The first drag of his tongue along your folds has you scrunching your eyebrows in pleasure, tightening your grip on his hair. Logan moans against you, the sound muffled as he dips the tip of his tongue into your entrance, lapping at your arousal with an insatiable hunger.
The way you purr his nameâa soft caress, a pat on his back that says Yeah, youâre doing fineâonly spurs him on, infusing every one of his ministrations with fervor.
His longing for you radiates in the intensity of his touch, sending shivers through you, making you writhe because of his hands alone.
Your core throbs. Your skin prickles with electricity. Your legs quake on either side of his face. Heâs hungry and youâre his feast. Heâs parched and youâre the last bottle of water in an arid world.
Logan eats you out like this will be the only time heâll have the privilegeâeach movement calculated, pushing all the right buttons, pulling out every trick he knows to make you think No, it doesnât get any better than this. This is as much as one can get.
Then his fingers join the symphony of pleasure, pumping in and out of you as he keeps flicking your clit with expert precision, and your back arches from the couch, following his pace with your hips. He pushes back, you push forwardâhe pushes forward, you push back.
Who is enjoying this more: him or you?
His pointed tongue teases your bud, matched with the persistent hammering of his fingers plunged into your wet heat. The combination has you coming on his mouth, falling over the precipice while you struggle to keep yourself together.
Your walls flutter around his digits, and your cries fuse with his groans, both overshadowed by his insatiable desire to savor until the last drop of your release.
Shockwaves ripple through your body and you prop your weight on your arms to capture his lips in a fervent kiss, your eyes rolling rolling back in ecstasy as you taste yourself, a mix of sour and sweet.
In a frenzy, he sheds his clothes, practically tearing them away, and you wrap your hand around his length, stroking him in time with your kisses. Logan pulls back, panting against you, and you steal a glance at him.
Your gaze travels down to his hard cock, the tip a furious red, and he seizes your wrist.
âWhy donât you kiss it better?â he rasps, his voice dropping an octave. In this moment, youâre taken aback by his beauty, and the urge to express it rises within you.
âYouâre so beautiful,â you murmur against his thigh, showering his skin with heated kisses. You stare in disbelief at the trail of hair leading to his girth, mouth watering at the sight.
A kiss on the tip, followed by a broad lick along a prominent veinâLoganâs grip on the armrest tightens, his knuckles turning white. âSo perfect.â
âShut up,â he retorts breathlessly, but you revel in the strangled noise that escapes him as you take him deeper, his head disappearing between your lips. His palm rests on your nape, anchoring you in place. âGoddammit. The fuckinââmouth you have on you.â
You try to take him in further once youâre feeling more confident, while Logan fights with all his might against the need to thrust his hips up into your warmth. He canât stay still, grunting and smothering you with lavish praise that heightens your arousal, slick pouring out of you in waves.
âPretty thing you are. Donât even know how to function around you. You got me allâfuck, actinâ all stupid.â
At one point, he tells you to stop, because he doesnât want to come just yet. You know what comes next as he rubs his cock along your folds, blending your wetness with his precum.
Itâs sloppy, and dirty, and messyâand God, do you love it.
He sinks into you and the world collides in a way you never expected. Everything you thought you knew falls apart, leaving you stranded in unfamiliar territory.
You canât comprehend how youâve spent so many years without him. Without this.
Your lips find his, and he swallows every sound he punches out of your lungs. His thrusts grow harder and faster as you adjust to his size, how big he feels inside you.
He digs his fingers into the globes of your ass, yanking you towards his shaft every time he fucks into you. You feel the brush of his balls against your skin, the way his muscles flex beneath your touch.
To this day, itâs still hard for you to wrap your head around the fact that love is what humans both strive and die for.
You come to understand it fully as his eyes flicker to yours, checking for any signs of discomfort in your features.
You understand why people write books and songs about love when he breathes your name in the shell of your ear, chanting how good youâre taking him, how tight and wet you are for him.
You understand the place love occupies in your life as the sound of your bodies slapping together creates a melody which has never been played before.
You understand why youâve searched for this your entire life, lifting every carpet in hopes of uncovering the love youâve pined for.
In the past, it had always felt like a raceâfinding your soulmate before the clock struck twelve. Now that you have him, you wonder what the future holds for you, how this connection will evolve.
For now, you can allow yourself the possibility of relishing the drag of his cock in your interior. His pace doesnât falter for a secondâsomething about mutants and their non-stop stamina, no doubt. He shoves a hand between your sweaty bodies, rubbing circles on your already swollen bud.
Each time he fills you to the brim, you have to ground yourself, resisting the pull of an altered reality.
âSo full,â you blurt out, mewling with a specially hard thrust, a chocked sob lodged in your throat. âPlease, stay.â
It could mean many things: Please, keep fucking me. Please, donât leave after this. Please, remain by my side form this moment onward, because I donât know how to go on with my life now that Iâve experienced this closeness.
Whatever meaning he ascribes to your words is of little importance. He tightens his arms around you, kissing you deeply, tongue and teeth clashing as they compete to see who wins the battle. âNever. Iâm never lettinâ you go, yâhear me?â
Heat pools in your lower back, a coiling tension radiating through your limbs. âYouâre mine, princess. Canât afford to lose you now that I found you. Gonna remind you every day.â
His rambling pushes you over the edge, your dripping cunt spasming around him as you reach your climax, moaning his name against his shoulder. You cling to him, convulsing beneath his body, and he grinds his hips into yours, his chest rumbling as he growls.
âInside,â you mumble, extending your hand to press it to his waist. âNeed you inside me. Please, I want it so bad.â
Logan stutters against you, his forehead falling against your collarbone as he finishes with one powerful thrust, his cock pulsing warm ropes of come within your cunt. You clench around him, whining as he prolongs both your pleasure and his, milking the last drop of his seed. His voice is a constant murmur, filling every space in the room until he slumps against you.
Night has fallen. The cut on your pinky no longer stings. Your scars, after all, are still there, nestled against Loganâs unmarked skin. You caress his back, sighing contentedly as a wave of peace washes over you.
Youâve never felt this relaxed.
Logan grasps your chin and tilts it up, a subtle smirk tugging at his lips. âHey,â he mutters, his gaze roaming all over your face.
You cup his cheek, his rough stubble grazing your palm. âHey, stranger. Long time no see.â
A genuine laugh pierces through the silence. the kind he rarely allows himself. Crinkles form at the corners of his eyes, his brow furrowing as he glances at you with love.
Loveâhadnât you pondered its existence for so long? Your fuel for living, the muse behind your best poems, a recurring motif in your fantasies.
Love now has Loganâs name written in ink, no longer a blank canvas awaiting its unknown owner. Noâitâs all his now.
Youâd do it all over again if it meant ending up like this, tangled and intertwined, with the promise of a future together. He has many stories to shareâabout his past universe, about himself. You have secrets to unveil, too. Thereâs so much you both have yet to discover about each other.
But time isnât up. This isnât a race, you remind yourself: things are just getting started.
Everywhere you go, every place you attempt to set foot in, there it is. Love is dressed up in an expensive silk robe, a ribbon tied neatly on top of it. You reach closer, trying to unravel it, though it's pointless. The moment love sees youâtruly sees your longing for itâit flees, and you struggle to keep up. Love runs faster than anyone, hiding within the bushes, counting the seconds until its next appearance.
Finally, youâve wrapped love around your finger.
dividers by: @cafekitsune thank you!!! <3
#imbeingsodeadass#i sobbed#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#wolverine#im in love#thank you author#heal me
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THE COMBO I NEEDEDDDDDđ©đ€
Halloween [L.H.]
Logan Howlett x neighbour!reader

summary: You dress up as Wolverine for Wadeâs Halloween party and it unleashes something in Logan. Him wearing a Ghostface mask also unleashes something in you. Or: Logan fucks you wearing a Ghostface mask.
warnings: smut 18+ (oral, unprotected (but inconsequential) p in v, creampie, doggy in front of a mirror, missionary, cum eating and also Logan spitting it into readerâs mouth, brief chasing kink, (Ghostface) mask kink obv, pet names: bub, baby, good girl), worst!Logan I guess but I couldnât find a pic to use, Wade being WadeÂ
word count: 3.8k
note: I didnât have that much time to write this but I wanted to post something for Logan before Halloween so <3, inspired by that I want to be fucked for Halloween sound on tt lol you'll see what I mean, and some ideas me and @ethanhoewke talked about đ€, also Iâve never watched Scream so all I can do is mention the mask lol | gorgeous dividers by @dollywons & @anitalenia <3
You meet your neighbours Logan and Wade in the laundry room of your building on Thursday night. Theyâre fighting over whether theyâre going to do a coupleâs costume for Wadeâs Halloween party next week.Â
âWeâre not a couple, Wade. Weâre not doing a coupleâs costume.â
Wade sighs as he stuffs his blood splattered clothes into the washing machine â youâve learnt not to ask anymore.Â
âHey,â Logan says when he sees you, and those three letters are enough to make your cheeks heat up. You wave at them both, busying yourself with your own washing.Â
Wade puts his hand on his hip, âCan you believe Logie wonât do a coupleâs costume with me after I adopted him and put a roof over his head? Heâs such an ungrateful brat.â
You giggle, meeting Loganâs gaze as he rolls his eyes at his roommate. He turns away to let you do your laundry in peace but Wade walks over to you, sitting down on the bench behind you.Â
âWhat do you want to be for Halloween? Sexy nurse? Sexy doctor? Sexy cop?â
You laugh, âWhy do they all have to be sexy?â
âBecause itâs you, so itâs impossible for the costume to not be sexy,â Wade raises his eyebrows and you smile at the compliment, sitting down next to him.Â
You sigh as you think about his question.Â
âFucked, Wade. I want to be fucked for Halloween.â
You hear a chuckle from Logan a few feet away. You were hoping he wasnât listening, but he does you the favour of keeping his head turnt in the other direction as he sorts through laundry. Youâre closer with Wade â you didnât necessarily want Logan knowing how badly you need to get laid.Â
Wade points to his own chest, âWait, by moi?â
âI love you but Iâd prefer someone who doesnât look like a burnt chicken nugget.â
âYou know what? Even though I look like a burnt chicken nugget, I still love myself. Learned that from the OG.â
You smile, âAnd anyway, I thought you and Vanessa were back together?â
âThat we are,â Wade says, rising to his feet and twirling out of the room like a ballerina, calling out, âIâll see you later for movie night!âÂ
âHeâs fucking crazy,â Logan says, chuckling, and you smile as you finish doing your laundry.Â
-
Youâre late to Wadeâs Halloween party the following week. You rush two floors up to their shared apartment, but your knocks go unnoticed through the loud music coming from inside and the door wonât open.Â
Youâre about to get your phone out to call Wade but you realise you canât. Your fake claws are in the way.Â
Youâre dressed up as Logan. You recently saw some pictures of when he was younger, effortlessly hot in a tanktop and jeans, hair styled charmingly, almost like kitty ears.Â
Accordingly, youâve got yourself a fitted tanktop, jeans that make you stop in front of every mirror to admire your backside, and a belt with a big buckle like the ones he used to wear. Youâve paired your outfit with kitty ears the colour of your hair and, of course, fake claws protruding between your fingers.Â
You hope Logan doesnât take offence. In your rush to get ready for the party, you didnât even consider that.Â
What if he doesnât like your costume? What if he thinks itâs disrespectful? You know heâs struggled with his mutation, after all, hurt people he loved because of it. Wade told you the costume was a good idea when you showed him your outfit the other day, but Wade isnât Logan.Â
Plus, itâs Halloween. Halloween is supposed to be scary, even if most peopleâs costumes arenât scary nowadays. What if Logan thinks youâre calling him a scary monster? Oh god. Youâre considering going downstairs and changing â into what, you donât know, but the last thing you want is to offend Logan, and if thereâs even just a small chance of it then you donât want to do it after all. Suddenly, you see Logan. Â
Heâs walking down the hallway where youâve zoned out, arms folded awkwardly because of your claws. He stops in his tracks, a plastic shopping bag hanging from his hand, and heâs squinting at you; you wouldnât say he looks mad but youâre not sure.Â
Logan comes closer, folding his arms. âAre you supposed to be me?âÂ
A smile creeps on his face as you tentatively answer with a ââŠyeah?â
He looks you up and down and it makes your skin heat up as he takes a step forward, âNot sure if I should be offended, bub.â
Oh noâ
He continues with a smirk, âGoing around stealinâ a manâs look and doing it better than him? Canât say that outfit used to look that good on me.â You sigh a breath of relief. He likes it. You smile at his compliment, and then heâs reaching out to give a light tug on the cat ears in your hair.Â
âI donât get what these are supposed to be though.â
You push the plastic hair band back in place as you smile up at him, âYou know exactly what they are.â
Logan shrugs. âYou got something wrong though.â
He stands next to you with the side of his arm pressed against yours, and you gulp at the sudden contact with his warm, beefy arm. Logan makes a fist and unsheathes his claws, holding them next to yours, and theyâre at least three times the length of your fake ones, metal sparkling even in the shitty light of the corridor.Â
âShould be much bigger,â he smirks, pulling them back in and unlocking the door for you. You donât miss the implication behind his words, and you swallow as you step into the loud party in their apartment that is decorated to the nines for Halloween.Â
Wade runs over to you to hug you, wearing a sexy maid costume over his Deadpool suit.Â
âI love it,â you tell him while he simultaneously compliments your outfit. You look around for Logan and only just catch him closing the door to his bedroom, and he disappears behind it. You were too distracted just now to realise that he wasnât even wearing a costume.Â
Your shoulders deflate as you realise heâs probably not coming back out. He was half of the reason you even came to the party. You were looking forward to spending some time with him, but now that you think about it, you wouldnât expect him to be interested in a Halloween party, crafting an elaborate costume and hanging up corny decorations the way Wade did.Â
You try to shake off your disappointment and enjoy yourself nevertheless.Â
-
Youâre stumbling back to the kitchen after dancing with Wade and Vanessa, getting yourself a drink. Youâre softly humming to the music coming from the other room when you feel a presence behind you.Â
Your heart speeds up for a moment when you see someone in a Ghostface mask standing right beside you. Heâs wearing the mask with a black, tight tanktop stretched over his broad chest. You smell Loganâs cologne as the scent swirls in the air around you, but you could have recognised him by the veins on his arms alone. Â
You try to keep your hopes at bay but you canât help but wonder if heâs wearing the mask because of you. When you watched Scream with him and Wade the other night, Wade kept teasing you about your crush on the killer.Â
At the time you felt like disappearing, hoping that Logan was as disinterested as he claimed, that he wasnât listening to anything you two were saying, but now youâre glad he heard. If heâs wearing the costume for your sake. Which he probably isnât. Youâve tried to convince yourself that your crush is unrequited, just to protect yourself. Itâs a common Halloween costume, nothing to do with you⊠probably.Â
âHi,â Logan says. You canât see his face but you can hear the smile in his voice.Â
âHeyâŠ,â you reply, almost shakily, âdidnât think you were coming.â
âI wasnât going to, couldnât be bothered to think of a costume. But then I found this so I thought Iâll join you.â
You nod along as he tells you about going out to buy the mask only today, but youâre not paying attention. All you can focus on is how hot it is that you canât see Loganâs face through the mask, but you still know itâs him. The way his voice is slightly muffled yet strong makes you shudder.Â
âSo, has your wish for Halloween come true yet?â
You give him a confused smile, only just realising that heâs asking you something.
âYou told Wade you wanted to get fucked for Halloween.â
Not able to stop a shy grin from spreading over your face, you say, âOh. No, hasnât happened yet. Not counting on it.âÂ
âNo one you like here?â Logan asks, and you look up at him, at the Ghostface mask, trying to think of a flirty reply when Wadeâs voice cuts through the tension in the room.Â
Wade runs over to Logan, leaning his head to the side flirtily, âI told you itâd look hot, peanut. Are you gonna hunt me later, Mr. Ghostface?â Wade brings a finger to his lip, and, for once, Logan doesnât get annoyed by his jokes.
âGhostface only hunts good girls,â Logan says, and your heart starts to beat faster yet again when you realise Logan is looking down at you.
âAm I not a good girl?â Wade asks, and Logan just huffs, ignoring him. You canât see his eyes, but you can still feel them on you. You have to bite your lip to stop yourself from moaning out loud.
Itâs not much later that Logan is chasing you through the hallways of your building, with you giggling and squealing only a few feet ahead of him as the adrenaline pumps through you.Â
He gave you a headstart but you know heâll catch you. You want him to catch you. Youâre fumbling with the keys to your apartment when he reaches you, your heart hammering in your chest at the thrill of being chased.Â
Loganâs hands go to your waist as he pushes you against your front door.Â
âI got you.â
You reach up to gently tug the mask off but he stops you when only his lips are exposed, and he grins. You smile and lean up to kiss him, and you somehow manage to fit your key into the lock while youâre making out and push the door open.Â
Logan lifts you and throws you over his shoulder like you weigh nothing as he carries you to your bedroom.Â
With your claws and the rest of your clothes discarded on the floor minutes later, Logan is fucking you in front of the mirror by your bed. Heâs taking you from behind, mask still on as he pulls and pushes at your hips with you fucking back against him as the mattress dips beneath you.Â
But as hot as it is to see the Ghostface mask looking down at you through the mirror, itâs also your first time having sex with Logan and you want to see him.
âCan I take the mask off?â you ask, looking back at him and Logan lifts you so that your back is flush with his chest. You turn around and pull the mask off over his head with a smile.
His hair is messy and a little bit sweaty, and as good as Logan usually looks you donât think youâve ever been quite this attracted to him. He holds your face to press a few sloppy kisses to your lips, and then he turns you back around to face the mirror.
Logan doesnât push you back on all fours, but takes your arms and clasps them behind your back, holding them together with one big hand. He slides his cock back into your wet pussy and begins to rub your clit with his other hand.
âLook at you,â he nods towards the mirror, and you meet his eyes in it, watching as his gaze trails down your body, to where his hand disappears between your soft thighs, âSo fucking pretty.â
You lean your head back against his shoulder as he continues to play with your pussy, but he canât properly fuck you at this angle, so you buck back against him until he manoeuvres you onto your back.
His lips find yours again and your arm sneaks around the back of his neck, holding him close as you kiss him desperately. You whine when his lips leave yours. He kisses down your neck and over your collarbones, down over your tits and over your belly. He arrives between your legs with a smirk and licks through the wetness of your pussy.
He moans when he first makes contact, âtastes even better than I fucking imagined, baby.â
You smile down at Logan as he pulls your socked feet onto his shoulders, fingers grabbing your ankles. âYouâve imagined this?â
Logan looks up at you, âEvery single fucking day. You havenât?â
You smile bashfully despite his own admission, but he doesnât let you answer anyway, moving his head back between your legs to make out with your pussy. He pushes two fingers inside you, the tips of his fingers rubbing up against your g-spot.
You begin to squirm as the heat builds up in your lower stomach, but Logan holds your hips down with his muscular forearm over your waist, âStay still for me, baby, okay?â
Logan starts sucking on your clit, and you cum immediately, back arching as you grab onto his hair. Your pussy pulses and throbs around his fingers as pleasure floods your body. You grind up to meet his mouth and he lets you use him until youâre breathless.
He places a last, rough kiss on your pussy, getting back on his knees to fuck you, but you breathe out, âGive me a second.â You smile shyly, your pussy still squeezing around nothing every few seconds.
âOf course, bub.â He leans down to kiss you and you mumble a question against his lips.
âCan I go down on you?â
Logan smiles and sits up, âMe orâŠ?â he nods over to the mask.Â
You shrug shyly, âWell, if youâre offering.â
âWhy do you think I wore it?â Logan smirks, pulling the mask back on. You briefly pull it up to his forehead again to give him a small kiss of appreciation.
He holds your hand as you get off the bed, sinking down onto the carpeted floor. You smile as his hard cock bobs in front of your face, glistening with precum and your wetness.
You place your hands on his knees and softly trace a path down his cock with your tongue, gently sucking his balls as you look up. A thrill shoots through you when you only see the mask looking back at you, and you move to suck Loganâs dick into your mouth as deep as you can, tasting your own arousal on him.
He throbs hotly against your tongue as you let spit run down his length, slapping his cock against your tongue.
âSuch a good girl,â Loganâs voice sounds from above you, and you look up at him, at the Ghostface mask, as you take his cock in your mouth again, your hands back on his knees for support.
You make out with the head of his cock, gently sucking on the skin down the side of him, licking your way up, playing with him.
âIâm close, baby,â he moans.
You mumble against his skin, telling him to take off the mask, and even though it comes out muffled he hears. Logan tugs off the mask in one quick movement, looking down at you with his eyebrows drawn together in pleasure and his lips bitten raw. His face glows with desire and a hint of sweat, and he hums when you suck him into your mouth.
You use your hand to jerk off the rest of him, moving your mouth down on him as far as you can, and your eyes flutter shut when you hear Logan moan, and heâs spilling the first ropes of his load down your throat. You keep sucking until youâve swallowed all of his cum, and only then do you take your mouth off him.
Sitting back, suddenly shy, you wipe your mouth with the back of your hand but Loganâs already tugging you up to the bed to kiss you.
âYou got another orgasm in you?â he asks against your lips. You straddle him and feel his hard cock smack against your thigh as you tell him yes. He tips you onto your back, leaning down to press a wet kiss to your pussy.
When he gets between your legs and pushes his cock into you again it somehow feels even better than the first time as you gasp in pleasure.
âYouâre so warm, bub. So perfect. Wanna stay here forever,â Logan says mindlessly as he bottoms out, and you whine into his mouth.
âWant you inside me forever too,â you babble, already fucked out. You wrap your legs around his waist as he fucks you. It feels like your wet pussy is sucking him in with the way you clech around him, and you both know you wonât take long for your next orgasms.
He slips a hand between your bodies to rub your clit as he begins to fucks you deeper. âYou gonna cum for me again, bub? You make such a cute face when you cum. Let me see it again, baby.â
Youâre nodding dumbly and letting the feeling of him take over, not just his big cock in your pussy and his slicked fingers on your clit, but the way his body feels on top of yours, warm skin against warm skin as he sloppily kisses your jaw and neck, and you cream around his cock as you cum, moaning his name.
âThatâs it, baby, doinâ so well. Taking my big cock like a good girl, hm?â Loganâs voice is strained, and then heâs cumming too, filling you up with his warm release until your pussy is stuffed full with his cock and his cum. He pulls out slowly and rubs your sensitive clit a little more.
âSo pretty,â he mumbles, fucking two fingers into you and when he pulls them out theyâre coated in his sticky load.
You reach out to pull him down by his wrist and take his fingers into your mouth, sucking his cum off them as he smirks down at you, rubbing a hand over his face to calm himself for now.
You both come down from your highs with laboured breaths, and he pulls you to lie your head on the pillow. Logan wraps his arms around you, just cuddling you for a bit, when you realise something and smile up at him.
âSo, are you that narcissistic that seeing me dressed up as you made you want to fuck me?âÂ
Logan smirks. âNah, wanted to fuck you way before that. And Iâm just honoured you like me enough to dress up as me.â
You open your mouth for a rebuttal but he instead takes that opportunity to push his tongue back into your mouth as he holds the side of your face. You make out lazily for another few moments, slinging your leg over his hip, but then you drag his hand away from your face.
âWell, Iâm honoured you like me enough to dress up for me.âÂ
âBaby, thereâs a lot more Iâd do for you than just dress up in a horror mask.â
âReally?â you smile. Logan nods earnestly. He holds you in his arms for a few minutes as you relax into the comfortable silence.
He pulls your hand up to his lips and kisses your knuckles, âWill you go out with me?â
You giggle then, âDonât think you have to ask me anymore.â
âWhat? I wanna be a gentleman.â
âYeah, very gentlemanly what you just did to me.â
You feel some of Loganâs cum drip out of your pussy and onto his thigh in that moment.
Logan looks at you and gives you a silly smile, lifting your leg off him to sit up, âYeah, baby, I am a gentleman, and a gentleman cleans up after himself.â
He spreads your thighs as he gets between them, and licks up your pussy, coating his tongue in his own cum. You smile at his words but soon you begin to pout in pleasure as he starts going down on you again.
You sigh when he stops and moves up to your face, but you smile when you realise what heâs doing, happily parting your lips for him. Logan leans over you and spits his cum into your mouth, âWe taste good together, hm?â he asks.
You swallow your combined arousals eagerly, closing your eyes as you savour the taste, but a gentle pat on your clit makes you open them again.
âYou got another one in you, right, baby? Just one.â You nod quickly, unable to form words with you needily spread open for Logan like this.Â
Lying back, you let Logan eat your pussy until youâre cumming again, your thighs pressing against his temples as he grabs at the flesh of your legs, licking your clit until youâre satisfied.
Logan lies back down next to you with his lips still shiny with your wetness, and you lean in for another kiss. He takes you in his arms to cuddle, when he asks you again.
âSo, will you go on a date with me?â
âOnly if it ends with you doing that thing with your mouth again,â you tease.
âOh, trust me, Iâm not going a day without it anymore.â
You giggle into his neck, relaxing against his muscular body.
Logan turns around when he gets a text, showing you his phone. Itâs a message from Wade:
Everyone left and Iâm about to give Vanessa a happy Halloweener if you know what Iâm saying! So donât come home tonight but I have a feeling you werenât going to anyway ;)
Logan cringes while you laugh, ready to put his phone back when another message comes through.
And if you donât treat her right Iâll cut off your Halloweener
Logan groans, switching off his phone. You laugh against his skin and let him hold you until you both sink into a warm, cozy sleep.
P.S. Logan thinks good girls reblog and comment on the fics they enjoy đ€đââïž
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18+ â mdni
I feel like Logan would love a girl with some meat on her bones. Don't get him wrong, he'd still love the way his hand could wrap around a girls waist, almost covered just by his palm.
But I think, he would love the way his rough palm could massage the soft flesh when he grips your waist. Traveling to the small pouch of fat resting on your lower stomach as he draws circles around it with his fingers.
Or pressing it down his tongue is practically inside of you. Drawing out more of your juices to lap up. He'd be one to be pussy drunk. Thumb almost digging into your inner thigh at how hard he is holding to keep them apart.
If you have rounded cheeks, oh he is a goner. Always having his hand on your face at all times. Either to squish them, seeing your eyes become smaller and the small pout.
Or when he is slamming his hips against you from behind. One hand on the soft mattress to steady himself while the other held onto your jaw. His thumb stroking his pretty girls cheek, saying soothing filthy words in your ear.
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Me too girl, my toođ©
[redacted] why are so many of your fics about sucking Loganâs dick? I dunno maybe I like dick in my mouth okay? Is it a crime?
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THE WAY I LITERALLY SQUEALED AND KICKED MY FEET!!!
Practice [L.H]
pairing: Logan Howlett x reader
summary: Your roommate Logan lets you practise giving a blowjob on him for your date with another guy.
warnings: smut, 18+, oral sex (f&m receiving, readerâs first time), Logan is a liittle mean but just a little and he gets softer towards the end, spitting, jerking off, Logan keeps his socks on I think itâs hot okay đđ, Logan calls reader bub, baby, good girl, pretty girl; Wade is mentioned but Iâm imagining a younger Logan than in DP&W
word count: 3.2k (this was supposed to be a drabble lol idk what happened)

âWhoâs the lucky guy?â Logan asks from the sofa as you walk past him in your pretty date outfit. Youâve got some time left before your date but you decided to get ready early in a bout of nervousness.
âThis guy Iâve been seeing,â you tell him, trying to seem nonchalant. You havenât yet mentioned to Logan that youâve been on a few dates. He spends a lot of time in his room, away from you and Wade, and he just never happened to be there to hear about your dates.
Logan mutes the tv. âWhat guy?â
âMet him online.â
âAnd heâs so good to you that you get this pretty for him?â
You smile at his indirect compliment and sit down next to him.
âYeah, heâs nice. I⊠I think we might go a step further today,â you feel your cheeks heating up, âIâm kind of nervous.â
You see his jaw clench slightly, âIf heâs a good guy he shouldnât make you nervous.â
âIâm not nervous because of him, itâs just that it would be my first time. And I donât want to be bad.â
He chuckles and leans back, âYou wonât be bad. Just make him go on top.â
Logan isnât taking your hint, so you take a deep breath to gather your courage. âWhat if he wants me to go down on him and I donât know how to do it? Will youâŠâ your voice falters as his eyes meet yours.
âWill you help me?â you stutter and Logan immediately begins to smirk. Embarrassment spreads through your body.
âHelp you how?â He asks, smug.
Itâs too late to go back now. âWell, I donât know. Like, explain how it works or.. you could show me?â you shrug.
âYou probably know better than me how to find porn online.â
âNo, I mean show me on you.â Thatâs all the courage you can muster for the day and you wonder if you will even have the strength to look back into Loganâs eyes. He solves that problem for you, putting a finger under your chin and pushing it up so youâre looking at him.
âYou wanna suck my cock?â He sounds annoyed and you immediately want to die.
âIt wouldnât have to mean anything,â you look at his cheeks, his nose, anywhere but his eyes, âI just wanna know if Iâm doing it right. Itâs okay if you canât cum, I just want to practise.â
Logan scans your face for a sign of discomfort â other than your embarrassment â but he doesnât find any. His features soften, âYou really wanna go down on me, bub?â
You nod quickly, âFor practice.â
âMhm, for practice.â Heâs mocking you, but all you can do is ignore it.
A thrill shoots through your body at his next words: âCâmere then.â He spreads his legs, clothed in jeans that strain around the thickness of his delicious thighs. You can see the outline of his abs through his tank top. You canât believe this is happening â youâve had a crush on him since you saw him for the first time.
Logan beckons you between his legs and you move to sit on the carpet, its fluffiness stopping your bare knees from hurting. Your short skirt rides up your ass and you pull it down self-consciously despite what youâre about to do.
âYou sure about this, bub?â Logan asks again from above you. You gulp when you look up at him. How does he look even better from below?
âYeah,â you assure him, your panties already growing wet. You sit down and try to patiently wait for instruction but you end up squirming. When you look back up at Logan heâs got one of his eyebrows raised.
âYou donât know how to open a belt either?â
âWell, yeah but donât we have toââ your mouth starts to water when the rough clink of his belt interrupts you. Heâs all but ripping open his belt; he unbuttons his jeans and takes out his hard cock. You almost get goosebumps.
âOh,â you say.
âIf a guy likes you, he doesnât need any time to get ready. Foreplay is just to get the woman nice and wet,â Logan tells you, although youâre barely listening. All you know is that you wouldnât need the foreplay either, youâre uncomfortably wet, trying to get friction against your legs that are folded underneath you.
Logan watches you stare at his erection, âTake your top off. I like seeing your pretty face but thatâll make it an even nicer view.â
âBut Iâm not wearing anything underneath,â you thumb at the thin straps of your top.
He smirks, âeven better.â He reaches down to pull the top up by your waist but then hesitates.
You nod but Logan rolls his eyes. âUse your words.â
âYou can take it off,â you say but you nevertheless put your arms in front of your tits when he pulls your top over your head.Â
Logan chuckles, âBaby, Iâve been dying to see your tits since I first met you. You really think you gotta hide?â The nickname makes you melt and your arms immediately drop to your sides.Â
You sit up straighter as Logan lets out a low moan, âGod, look at you. So fucking perfect.â He reaches out to grope your tits almost clumsily. His cock bobs in front of you as he leans down to touch you and you feel yourself getting addicted to him already. You just want to start.
With a last rough squeeze of your tit, Logan leans back. âWet your lips,â he instructs. You lick your lips.
âWetter,â he says, and your eyebrows crease in confusion as you lick your lips again.
Logan huffs, spits into his hand, and smears his spit over your mouth, âThere. Donât you look fucking pretty like this.â You just about purr against his hand and then push against it with your cheek.
You place your hands on either of his knees and lean in to kiss the tip of his cock, all swollen and ready. You immediately feel the urge to go further but your shyness takes over, so you keep pressing wet kisses to his length.
âGod,â Logan groans, leaning his head back in pleasure as you keep kissing, and you start to use some more spit.
âLook at you, donât even need me to tell you what to do,â he pulls his arms behind his head smugly, like an asshole, and you smile, getting shy again. You kiss along the underside of his cock some more, getting more desperate with every second.
âWhat now?â You ask.Â
Logan softly smiles at you for a second, pulling his jeans and boxers further down his thighs. You pull them off completely as he pulls off his top. Heâs naked in front of you now, except for his socks, and you take a second to appreciate all the broadness and his muscles. The hair from his chest all the way over his abs and down to his cock is begging for you to kiss every inch of it but you force yourself to focus.
Logan takes his cock in his hand to lift it out of the way, and slowly starts to jerk off. His eyes go to you and then to his balls, and you get what he wants you to do. Still, he gives you one word: âLick.â
You move forward, inhaling all his manly smell, instinctively going to press another wet kiss to his cock. You let spit pool in your mouth and begin to lick all over his balls, feeling the heaviness of them on your tongue.
âTake as much as you can, baby,â he rasps, continuing to jerk off. You almost slap his hand away â you want to be the one making him feel good â but you stop yourself.
You do as he tells you, opening your mouth to cover as much of him as you can, the warmth of his balls against your tongue making you drool.
âYeah, baby, juuust like that. Thatâs a good girl,â he breathes heavily.
Your pussy clenches around nothing at his words, and you have to take a deep breath to focus on anything but the wet ache between your thighs.
His balls move against your tongue from his jerking off, and you gently suck on the skin, moving around a few inches every few seconds. But the movement from his hand on his cock is becoming distracting and, without thinking, you instinctively push his hand away.Â
He stills and then smiles, lifting his hand away. He lightly leans his elbows on the back of the sofa to the sides of him.Â
âYou can start sucking my cock now if youâre ready, baby. Been doing such a good job.â
âI donât know if I can take all of it,â you pout. Even just imagining his dick down your throat feels too much, though not in a bad way. Heâs just so fucking big.Â
âJust take as much as you can. I bet you can take more of me than you think.â
His words motivate you. You go up slightly on your knees, carefully wrapping your hand around his cock. You spit on it, letting it slowly slide down the sides as you begin to spread it with your hand.Â
Logan huffs out a laugh from above you, âSo adorable. You donât need to be so careful. Here, do it like this.â He wraps his much bigger hand around yours and he starts to jerk off with your hand, showing you how rough you can be as he starts to fuck your fist.Â
You clear your throat, âCan I use my mouth now?â
He bites his lip, âReady when you are, baby. Just breathe through your nose and relax.â Oh, youâre relaxed. Being between Loganâs meaty thighs is the best youâve felt in your life.Â
You press another kiss to the tip of his cock and part your lips to take him in your mouth. The first second you feel the heaviness of his cock on your tongue is like heaven. Logan lets out a low moan and you look up to find his eyes already on your face. He looks like a god from below, his muscles starting to glisten with a thin layer of sweat.
Opening your mouth wider, you take more of him. You start to jerk him off where your mouth canât reach but you do your best to go as deep as you can, moving up and down with your wet mouth.
The feeling of Loganâs cock in your mouth is addicting, and the quiet sounds he is making even more so.Â
âDoinâ so good for me, baby,â he whispers, voice weak. You look up into his eyes as you suck his dick, spit starting to run down your hand, and a smirk spreads on Loganâs face.
âSuch a pretty girl,â he leans his head back.
Your jaw is starting to strain because heâs so big but you never want to stop doing this. You swallow down the taste of his precum and canât wait to actually make him come. Heâs starting to pulse in your mouth, abs contracting with every time your tongue moves.
Youâre wondering how much longâ
âYâgonna make me come, baby. Gonna come so hard,â Logan moans, and you figure heâs warning you but you want nothing more than his cum in your mouth.
You put in all the effort you can, sucking Loganâs cock further down your throat, cheeks hollowing. You start to feel him at the back of your throat, spit spilling from your lips.
Logan groans, and then heâs filling up your mouth, pumping his cum down your throat as you eagerly swallow. You look up at him through your lashes, taking in his face, his eyes shut and mouth hanging open in pleasure as a long, almost pathetic, groan comes out.
Heâs coming longer than youâd expect, coming in your mouth in sticky ropes, a hand guiding the back of your head. You still pout when heâs finally drained and he slowly pulls his hips back.
Logan sighs a last breath of pleasure and holds his hand in front of your mouth. âWhat?â you ask.
âSpit.â
âUh, I swallowed,â you say.
âReally?â
You stick out your tongue for Logan to see your empty mouth.
He smirks. âGod,â he huffs, âso fucking perfect. Câmere.â He pulls you up to the sofa and sits you on his lap, your bare chest against his. Logan pushes his mouth against yours, kissing you like heâs filled with a new desire, as if you didnât just make him come.
You donât get to kiss him for very long though, because he pulls you to lie down on the sofa, turning so your legs are spread around him.
ââm gonna show you what itâs supposed to feel like for someone to eat your pussy. Just so you know your date is doinâ it right, âkay?â
What date? You almost ask. You remember for a second but then, looking at him, all of your thoughts are replaced with Logan again. âYes,â you nod hornily, âPlease.â
âThere you go, got you even saying please now. You want it that bad, huh?â
All you can do is nod as he pulls down your skirt and panties. He almost goes cross-eyed when he sees your pussy for the first time.
âGod, baby, you coulda said something. Such an eager little thing. You got that wet from having my cock in your mouth, hm? Gonna make you come so good, yeah?â
You nod again and he bends down to press another sloppy kiss to your lips, kissing down your neck and stopping at your chest, âCanât get enough of these,â he plays with your tits, desperately grabbing at them like a man seeing a woman naked for the first time.
He smiles up at you when he realises how much time heâs spent at your chest, pressing a last kiss to your sternum before placing one of his big hands on your tit and kissing further down. You assume heâs going to stop before he gets to your pussy, just to tease you, but he kisses all the way down from your belly button to your clit, starting to make out with your pussy.
âLogan,â you moan, your hand flying to his hand on one of your boobs.
âFeel good?â He asks, and you almost faint when you look at his head pushed between your thighs. He looks exactly right, as if this is where he was meant to be the entire time.
âMhmm.â
He chuckles against your pussy, tongue darting out to play with your clit. The ache between your legs starts to get worse with him there, and you feel your pussy clenching around nothing.
Logan smirks and pushes your thighs further apart with a rough hand. He starts to gently rub your clit, and youâve finally got the friction youâve been needing this entire time. Youâre already close.Â
You let out an involuntary moan as he pushes his thick middle finger inside you, and you grip his hand on your tit harder, and he squeezes you there, lovingly.Â
âI got you, baby,â he says into your pussy before starting to fuck you with his finger, pushing another one in as he begins to rub a sweet little spot inside that you can never reach yourself.Â
He leans in to start licking your clit again, circling it with his tongue and, ever so slightly, beginning to suck.Â
Youâre so close, the waves of pleasure almost, just almost, flooding over you. You squirm, your knees pushing together, held open by his broad shoulders.Â
Logan sucks harder, fingers fucking into you with your clit pulsing against his tongue.Â
It only takes a few more seconds of Loganâs mouth on your pussy for you to come. Pleasure explodes within you and floods your entire body as you arch your back, pushing further into him and his wet mouth and thick fingers.
Logan doesnât stop until youâre satisfied and your legs go numb around him.
He grins at you, biting his lip to stop his smile from spreading too far, and he presses a kiss to the middle of your belly, squeezing your tit gently before letting go. You feel cold without him there.
With your legs still around him, you instinctively pull him in and he lies down next to you on the sofa, gently caging you against the back of it to give you the more comfortable side as he balances on the edge.
âYou wanna know how good you taste?â Logan asks, not waiting for an answer before he kisses you. You slide your hand behind his neck to pull him in, tasting yourself on his tongue.
He stops kissing you. âSo.. you still going on your date?â
You feel your cheeks getting hot, âWhat if I told youuuâŠâ you twirl a strand of Loganâs hair thatâs hanging over his forehead, âthat there never was a date. Or a guy.â
Logan breaks out in a smile, âYou were too shy to ask me to fuck you so you made up an entire person?â
You hear the key turning in the lock in that moment, and even though youâll be covered by the back of the sofa Logan shields you with his hands as best as he can, reaching for your clothes.
Wade comes in and you immediately sit up, holding Loganâs hand and forearm to your tits to cover them.
âGuess what happened?â you squeal at Wade.
Wadeâs eyes go over to you and then to Logan, and he drops his bags of grocery shopping to jump up and down, âWas it my plan? I told you my plan would work!â
You grin, âIt was your plan.â
Logan looks between you and Wade, rolling his eyes but heâs unable to hide a smile.
âIt was a good plan, right? I told her she could just ask you out but she was too shy so I told her to make up a guy sheâs dating,â Wade explains.
âAlright,â Logan laughs quietly, âNow fuck off so I can fuck my girl again.â
Wadeâs eyes go wide and he says what youâre thinking, âMy girl? Iâd faint if he called me that. You owe me,â he points at you.
You blow a kiss at Wade and he pretends to catch it, pressing it to his lap. You roll your eyes and smile, waving at him, âYou heard him, weâve got stuff to do.â
The almost animalistic smirk Logan gives you when Wade is gone should scare you, but it only makes you want him more. He picks you up in his arms, carrying you to his room. You canât wait for whatâs to come.
-
P.S. Logan thinks good girls reblog and comment on the fics they enjoy đ©·đ«Ł
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somewhere south with fruits sweeter
logan howlett x fem!reader â 6.6k
(s). with your mother smitten during your visit, he was bound to taste her cooking soon. sharing food is an intimate act, and you werenât expecting to offer something to him, too.
. . . extras: 18+ minors dni; written with origins!logan in mind; one (1) mention of drinking; reader is slightly shorter than logan; no use of y/n or she/her pronouns, only described as a daughter; pet name âsweetheartâ; descriptive touching and kissing; very brief thigh riding; implied sexual content: oral (r receiving); a lot of fruit & food symbolismâdo with that what you will; this is my first longer-length work so comments are much appreciated! x


ââââââââââââââ gif from @ultrviolecnt
Maybe the fruits tasted all the more ripe, a real pleasure to eat, due to his hands now arranging their shapes in the weathered, woven baskets; you hadnât seen him when you visited last year and such a change in the apples, peaches, pears wouldâve surely made itself known.Â
He was one your mother brought into casual conversation sitting on the front porch or working simple chores, and she insisted others were doing just the same; who could place blame on them when such a man was sure to bring about hushed dialects and connotations, a secret of sorts kept in the confines of the townâs acres.Â
Because of your visiting for the season, it was you instead of your mother who drove the half an hour to the familiar wooden shop that rose with the respective fall of the leaves.Â
It was becoming something of a bore in the years past, but a little less so now with him around, his presence and rather effortless strength admittedly easy on the eyes. Your mother spoke of him with high regard; only a few minutes after stepping out of your car and onto the gravel of the marketâs driveway was enough for her praise to turn tangible in the summer heat that first morning, it now being replaced with a push of a breeze.
You noticed that even with the broad stretch of his shoulders, the trecks his boots left behind from mud crawling in the back, he somehow still managed a sort of ease about his figure as he worked. Anything he started in the chill of the morning he got done right as the sun rested its bleary eyes, leaving with a nod and a cigar in between his lipsâall without speaking much. When he would carry in fills of crates with jams or fruits and vegetables, he wouldnât stop to make talk with the customers, instead searching for another task that whispered his name once as wood warmed from the sun, now as a twirl of leaves browned and reddened scuttling against the exterior. You figured he didnât do so from irritation at the others he worked withâyou had known them since you were little and they were nothing if not welcomingâbut as a means of simply getting work done; talk not adjacent to his doing mustâve been fruitless.Â
You didnât dwell on the fact, instead revellingâas much as you hated to admitâin meeting hazel with an unintelligible finish to the color in the teasing cold the times you had walked with a slow gait through the aisles, brushing past weathered gingham a dusted color from years past.
Tonight you were to be greeted with an infamous cherry pie, having been told to get as many cherries as you pleased, along with anything that seemed âgood on the soulâ. (She might as well have been hinting at him, written his name big and bold, with hearts curving over the letters.)
When you stepped through the doorway and atop the makeshift floor of scuffed wood underneath homemade rugs frayed at the edges, you only barely caught denim shifting out the back, presumably to bring in more boxes with whatever was to be displayed alongside a handwritten note detailing a new price for eager hands and acquired tastes. You stepped around tables with thin cloths acting like decor, embellishments to distinguish one from another, and stopped short when the usual spot for your motherâs preferred cherries was implied with folds in gently disheveled plaid.
At the furrow of your brows and your leaning over adjacent boxes and barrels to see if perhaps they were hidden someplace nearby, a lady to your side gestured to the spot with a jut of her chin.Â
âLogan just went to grab a new batch, hun. Heâll be back in a second.â
You nodded at her words, involuntarily crossing your arms over your chest to the best of your ability with a basket in your hand. Broken conversations slipped in one ear and out of the other as you waited, talk of food to be prepared or how distant children were growing taller by the day. Shuffling of feet with a deep groan brought your attention back to the space prior, Logan now standing with a crate in his hands, a stitched cloth draped over the top. His tongue prodded at his cheekâthe skin there, the bridge of his nose, the knuckles of his hands, beginning to flush pink from a gentle biting of the air outsideâas he set it down, taking the covering off and tucking it into the back pocket of his jeans after hitting it once against his thigh, the dust trickling down the denim to the floor, the creases in his boots.
You muttered a âthank youâ, not expecting much more out of him in return. He simply nodded, but a clearing of his throat dragged your eyes to his.
âYour mom the one making the pie?â
He continued talking at the quick flicker of slight confusion that washed over your features, that made your palm pause as it reached out to pick the nicest ones, reds shiny and seductive around inedible pits. âSomeone came around last week, told me her daughter was coming to stay for a little while and she wanted to bake something nice.â A pause, a narrowing of his eyes, your own drifting upwards to brown strands undone from their styling, now brushing above his brows in light curves.
Knowing your mother spoke of your person to him brought a smile to your lips. âShe loves to gossip,â you admitted with a nod to confirm his ask. âEspecially over her cherry pie.â
He let out a hum, eyes following the hand that held a bunch of said fruits from their stems. He stayed that way for what felt like a while, though it was really only a few seconds; his gaze was soft, but bore into your basic movement, as if assessing which of the fruits he had brought you so kindly you were to pick.
A call of his name directed them someplace behind you with a lean of his upper half and a hand to his hip.Â
âNice meeting you,â he said, catching your eyes as he brushed past your figure, smell of smoke and freshly picked fruits stuck to his skin, mimicking a wanting to bite innate to your psyche, to savor the source at your lips and teeth, though they were all laid out in front of you; perhaps that was the point.
ââââââââââââââ
The next week, with a complaint of the chill that crawled into the crevices of her jacket and a harsh adjusting of the heater, your mother sat in the passenger seat eagerly awaiting an order she had placed with the owner days prior. Turning onto the gravel lot that rocked the interior, you found a vacant spot with a curse at how uneven the small plot had gotten. She let out a gasp and nudged an elbow to your arm as she unbuckled her seatbelt, hand already opening the door.
âLook whoâs working today.â She knew he worked everyday they were open, but you rolled your eyes with a smile at her teasing natureâshe could have her fun, you figured as you followed her out, slamming the door behind you.
Logan, much to your amusement, played into her harmless comments. He worked at the front, adjusting the panneling of the signs welcoming passerby, a carpenterâs belt wrapped around his waist and a nail inbetween his lips. At the shuffling of your motherâs feet coming closer to where he stood, he looked over with a charming smile.
âArenât you a sight for sore eyes,â he mumbled, nail a mimic of his cigars as he spoke, dipping his head as a hello to the both of you when you stepped to her side.
Your mother dismissed his words with a swat of her gloved hand in the air, flattery evident as a smile. âYouâre talkinâ. Just here to pick up a few things for dinner tonight.â
He furrowed his brows, shoving the nail into a pocket of his belt, adjusting its hold on his waist. âI mightâve packed them all earlierââhe began to make the way inside, gesturing his chin for you to followââbut Iâll have you check.â
Not long after, he was carrying crates to the trunk of your car at the insistence she neednât lift a fingerâeven with the slight cold becoming familiar with the skin of his own hands. You offered after her, but he repeated his words with a threading of his hand through his hair. There were quiet huffs and groans leaving his lips as he did so, his breath mocking smoke. Your mother instead headed inside, while you stood at the trunk, leaning against the chilled exterior; there wasnât any harm in looking for a little longer, hearing more evidence of his voice a little closer.Â
He spoke first, an octave lower and with a lilt of amusement.
âDinner must be good tonight.â He met your eyes for a split second before placing a hand ahold of the trunk above his head. âSeems like youâre havingâŠâ he pinched a cloth from the crate closest to the edge, lifting it with a dramatized slowness, leaning over with a raised browâsomething of a defeated breath left his lips. âWhy donât you mind tellinâ me.â
You leaned over for yourself, hands pushing similar cloths for a peek at what it was your mother had bought. The two of you were so close, or so it felt, as if keeping the contents of your trunk hidden from all but the hazel of his and your own. There wasnât a need for your peripheral; a simple knowing he was near was enough, a certain spark in your nerves for the scene felt intimate, this unveiling of what you were to eatâyou knew, of course, what was to be served that night, and he most likely knew that, too.
ââââââââââââââ
Surely they would be sick of seeing you when the sun had dipped with a lazy arch, pulling underneath the horizon. And yet, there was an ache in your motherâs stomach that she insisted could only be softened with one of their homemade pastries, something she shared with you when you were little, and as she focused on dinnerâwhich youâd assume would only make such an itch worse, even given the contrast of savory to sugarâyou flipped on the headlights into the last hours of the evening.
You gave something of a guilty nod to the woman at the counter as you made your way to the shelving in the back corner that held the familiar packaging, alongside others. All that was on display was shrouded in thin, gentle slits of white, the moon offering its own of what the sun had given prior. The fruits looked misty eyed, the jars as if filled by a dreamy hand.
Just as quickly as you had pulled into the lot, you were twisting the keys once more; yet this time, a weak sputtering from your engine sounded rather than its usual dull rumble.
âYouâve got to be kidding me,â you mumbled, one hand gripping the wheel and the other getting ahold of the key once more, this time with a slower insertion and turn, itâs cold against your palm a mimicry of the early night air. The same cough, akin to a sickness in a body, invading the steel and screws of your car.
With a groan, you threw the door open, circling to the hood and, with a steady grip, lifting it above your head.Â
It was now far too dark to tell where one part ended and another began, it simply a blend of shadow you certainly did not feel like combing through with the chill as an accomplice.Â
You smelled the burning end of a cigar before the scraping of gravel along soles.Â
âYou alright?â Logan asked, voice leaking smoke like a lure for both your eyes and ears. His skin was accented with a soft gold from the flickering bulbs of the market as he stopped a few feet away, holding the cigar lazily at his hip. The lighting was bewitching, a natural distraction, and you cursed the way your eyes dragged at the outline of his shoulders, the narrowing at his waist, silver of a buckle glinting for a moment as if catching you in the act.Â
At your not answering, he took another drag, peering into the hood for himself, though you were sure he could guess your response at the knitting of your brows, the irritated grip of your hands to the front bumper.Â
âCâmon.â
You simply stared as he gestured with his chin, cigar to his lips, front half already turning the other direction. âIâll take you homeââsmoke curled at his cheeks, the hair that was cut shorter to the skin, when he glanced over his shoulder at you having not moved a muscleââunless youâd rather stay out here.â
Much like when you both had been eyeing the insides of your trunk, it was as though your body knew of his presence just as much as your mind; sitting in his passenger side stiff against the seating, some unconscious reminder that tugged at your joints to keep them still, as if there was an awareness that preceded him in the form of tensed muscles and intrigue, a nipping at your eyes to even just look at him when he was this close, wanting that satisfaction, whatever it was, that came as a consequence to curiosity, infatuation, more like.Â
âNever seen you this late at the market.â
You cleared your throat, explaining the pastry you bought for your mother. âI think this is just my carâs way of telling me not to.â
A laugh disguised itself as an exhale through his nose. ââm not that bad.â
Your eyes caught his own when you furrowed your brows in amusement at his words, a barely registrable hint of a smile on his face.
âI didnât said that,â you argued, though your tone was anything but. He angled the hand resting atop the steering wheel and the palm at his thigh upwards, feigning defense.
The drive wasnât too long; neither was conversation. He asked about your mother, how long you were staying for, but more as a means to ease the space in between simple directions from you.
He slowed to a stop in front of your doorstep, shoving the stick into park as you began to get out, opening the door and stepping onto the ground, pastry in hand. You placed a hand against the cool exterior, offering a smile and about to utter a thanksânot entirely dismissing the way he was looking over at you, leaned over to grab a cigar from a case stowed in the glove box, a necklace of some sort having loosened from beneath autumn layers and swaying in tandem with the column of his throatâwhen your motherâs voice called instead.Â
âLogan, is that you?â she sang, voice sounding pleasantly surprised and a harsh cut through the relative quiet of the night.
His brow raised in amusement; you rolled your eyes in a silent apology.Â
He answered nonetheless.
âYes, maâam, itâs me.â
Immediately at his simple confirmation your mother was ushering him in for dinner. And who was he to decline such an offer.
It was far too casual: the way he let you in first, a ghost of a palm over the small of your back; taking off his boots at the front door; nodding at your mother and asking her how she was as he eyed two plates she had already filled with whatever she had made for dinner that night on the countertop. You placed the pastry in her hands, to which she gave a quick kiss to your cheek and insisted the both of you sit and eat before the food got cold.
Without a word he took the two plates in his hands and walked over to the dining table, setting them opposite each other as you stood at your motherâs side, her face implying an explanation as to why you were in his truck, as well as a teasing response to his manners. You merely muttered an âIâll tell you laterâ as you filled two cups of water and grabbed two forks and knives.
He nodded as a thanks as you put the glass in front of him. The overhead light was warm, dipping down the slope of his nose and the hair that curled upwards at the nape of his neckâit almost didnât look like him seated in your home, taking the silverware from your hand, the tips of his fingers brushing again the skin of your hand. It was someone who neednât falter at the door, who memorized which floorboards creaked their complaints, who muttered âgood morningâs and âgood nightâs to a lover in time with the celestial company.
Watching him eat food from your motherâs hand felt like he was indulging in a part of you, this meal that youâve eaten time and time before now being offered to him.
âItâs really good.â His voice was practically a whisper, the quietest youâd ever heard it, as if only you could be told such a thingâyou hadnât any part in the plate already nearly scraped clean in front of him, your mother feet away, unwrapping the pastry for dessert.
You nodded, a smile on your lips even with the fact. âFamily recipe,â you simply said.
He hummed, eyeing you over the rim of his glass. It met the wood with a gentle clink after a generous sip, tongue darting briefly across his lips.Â
His eyes drifted to her at the counter, crossing his arms on the tabletop.
âYouâre a wonderful cook.âÂ
She turned her head with a smile. âThank you, Logan.â You hadnât missed the way she gestured towards yourself with a fork donned with crumbs and raspberry jam. âThough I might have competition soon, what with the pie thatâs supposed to be made this week.â
You furrowed your brow in mock irritation, your voice spoken through a smile nonetheless. âWhoâs to say it wonât be the worst thing youâll ever taste in your life?â
She raised her own brow, questioning your words. âIf Iâve taught you anything, itâs how to make a damn good pie, hun,â she retorted with conviction in her tone as she averted her attention to her pastry once more.
You rolled your eyes in a lighthearted manner, catching Loganâs as your knifeâs teeth dragged along what little you had left on your plate; the barely-there smile on his lips told you he was amused by your shortlived banter.
âThat a family recipe, too?â he asked.
âIt will be, once I figure out how to make it.â You paused to finish your plate, the knife and fork resting nicely atop the porcelain. âThough Iâm thinking of a blueberry pie rather than cherry.âÂ
With a nod, he gathered his own plate, reaching over to take yours as he got up from his seat, his way of insisting you need not get up and clean after him nor yourself.
Hazel slightly hooded held the color of yours as he did so. âIâm sure itâll be just as good.â
At this point, it almost seemed proximity was an arrangement made from whatever guided your limbs to his, and that same culprit threaded itself in his, for your mother handed you the dish towel when she hastily remembered she needed to call her sister. Whether it was true didnât matter: here was an excuse to stay close, revel in contact that was teased by the lack of it. He stood at the counter, sleeves rolled to below his elbows, hair corded at his forearms wet from the tap water, the lather that coated his palms and knuckles. Lavender was a foreign scent to be attached to his skin, not one to prettily mingle with cigar smoke, but your nose got used to it regardless.
It was a quiet process, his washing and your drying. Your eyes would wander to his hands, stay for just a little while, the shine from the warm water accenting the skin something almost seductive with the performance of such a domestic taskâif he noticed, he didnât say anything.
Over beer you had found in a back cabinet growing lukewarm under the dining lighting, you learned he had gotten the job at the farmerâs market just as the sun opted for a few more hours, offering as a trade deep oranges that shrouded the landscape and any roaming warmth that stuck to wood and grass and skin. He was in the area and needed work, there had been a sign posted near where he was staying of the address and basic requirements, and, in his words, âhe could use the free foodâ. Though it made you wonder where exactly it was that he was staying, you didnât pry. He instead recounted the morning your mother came in and theyâthough mostly her, he admitted with a smile at your small laughâhad engaged in friendly talk as he carried her groceries to her car.
âShe hinted at saving a slice of that cherry pie fâme, for the help.â His lips tugged ever so slightly as he leaned back comfortably, stretching the denim at his thighs taut with a shift in his legs, arms crossed and all the while keeping his eyes on yours. âBut I prefer blueberry.â
And how clichĂ© it had been when you first saw him, a rugged yet quiet stature of a man with sweat at his brow and the dents of the muscles lining his arms, blue denim to the dirt of his boots, a worn baseball cap keeping the sun from his eyes, and how clichĂ© it was now that he was in your home and you didnât mind.
There was a mention from your mother, standing just at the end of the hallway to face the kitchen and the two of you, of a shelf and drawer that needed fixing in the old guest room as you walked him to the door, a calloused hand already wrapped around brass.
âIâll take a look at it in a few days,â he reasssured her with a soft smile, to which she told him you could offer a few slices of pie in thanks, all with a grin on her face that she also adorned when quoting othersâ words of amusing connotation.Â
He chuckled, a low sound that came from his chest. The old creak of the door was paired with a âhave a nice nightâ as she retreated around the corner into the hallway. You stepped out before him onto the front porch as he swung it closed, though just enough so it didnât click into place with the frame; the porch light adjacent to it casted a similar color against his skin to the one when he ate.
You didnât really know why you stood there in the chill that lay stagnant around your home, but he didnât ask.Â
He shoved his hands into his pockets, nodding to the door. âThat better be a promise.â
You crossed your arms across your chest. âDepends on how good of a job you do.â
A chuckle, same as before, this time his breath appearing in between the two of you. âAre you doubting me already?â
âThereâs only one way to prove me wrong,â you said, raising a shoulder.Â
He hummed in , barely audible, tilting his head.
Your body wasnât as stiff, your mind as clouded with nerve as it had been in his passenger seat, though you blame it on his figure having been surrounded by comfort, familiarity, food he had eaten with your cutlery at your dining table and with a good word.
Perhaps that was why it had leaned the small distance towards his own, lips meeting the skin of his cheek and the stubble adorning it. The small smile that he reciprocated was something almost satisfactory, albeit a little bashful, as you put a hand against the door, not missing the brief dart of his eyes from yours to your lips and back again.
âGood night, Logan.âÂ
âGânight.â
ââââââââââââââ
It served as a harsh reminder, the honk that met your ears rather than the usual gentle birdsong. You cursed, shoving the window open with one hand and yelling a âgive me a minute!â as you hurriedly dressed in the dwindling dim of your bedroom; the memory that he was picking you up to get your car from the market came far too late for your liking as you made your way to the front door, grabbing the keys and about to say a rushed âgoodbyeâ when the absence of your mother made itself known, as wellâshe had left to visit her sister, and you noticed the familiar yellowed sheet lined with grooves from cherry staining fingertips placed at the counter.Â
He gave you an apologetic smile as he stood leaned against the passenger side, eyes following your rushing down the stairs, uncrossing his feet and opening the door for you.Â
âToo early?â There was humor in his words and the way he eyed the buttons left undone at your sternum.
âYou told me you donât work today,â you reasoned after he circled the hood, closing the driverâs-side door and adjusting the heating, catching your eyes as he did so.
âEarly bird getâs the worm, or whatever,â he shrugged. âThe wormâs your car.â
You rolled your eyes, though a tired yet amused smile was already at your lips. âI already own it.â
âRegardless.â He rolled out of your driveway, the morning sun through the windshield catching the silver of a ring at his pinky finger. âDonât want anyone stealing it, do we?â
âNo, sir,â you said, eating into this side of him like teeth against a sweet.
A smile akin to the one he adorned at your doorstep hours previously came across his face, and you returned one of your own, despite his eyes on the small bit of gravel road.Â
He worked as you watched from the wooden fencing behind him. âA simple fix,â he had deemed it, eyeing into the hood of your car. âShouldnât take longer than half an hour.â
Beneath gray cotton the plane of his back shifted and stretched. Though it wasnât as cold as days prior, you noted the pink coming to at the shells of his ears.
ââs it alright if I come by this afternoon to take a look at that shelf your mother was talking about?â He turned his head just enough to see you nod.Â
You told him you were going to walk around the market, just to see if there were any new jams or pastries shelved; he watched you leave.
Given the sun had only made its tired arrival a few hours prior, some items were still being arranged nicely atop the patterned cloths, labelled with notes marking the price. The jams were put with ribbons at the lids with their respecting fruit.Â
There were a few wildberry, a number of blackberry. As you read the labels on some of the fresher desserts, someone carried a crate of needed vegatables behind you; not before they asked if you were the one that came with Logan. You confirmed, wondering for a second if maybe he had work and simply lied, but they spoke before you could with a singular, almost dumbfounded laugh.
âYou mustâve put him in some sort of spell,â they said, dropping the crate at a table in front of them and shoving it to the edge. They turned to face you, clapping their hands to dust off chips stuck to thin gloves. âI donât think weâve even heard more than a âgood morningâ from him.â
You couldnât figure out how to respond to such a blunt way of reiterating something you already knew, but perhaps it was because others had noticed it was you he chose to speak to, and you who implicitly invited him in your home, and you who were to do so again.
ââââââââââââââ
That afternoon, you indulged in the sun that was filtered through the lace curtaining as you gathered cutlery and tins and bowls and plates. The quiet of the house was something you liked every once in a while, as it allowed you to imagine you were cooking for yourself rather than for two; something about only your word and teeth influencing the taste when you were to set up the dining table for yourself, lighting a candle to present a dinner for one was nice to admire.Â
But you werenât, for the hammering persisted rooms over once more, a reminder that something sweet was to be offered to him this time.
You might have felt more at ease if he was your lover; youâd have enough tries at that point, perfected a recipe already perfected by your mother. Instead he would be second to cut the lattice for his own pleasure with a fork you would hand over to himâa part of you did not want to disappoint.
Blueberry had since settled into the skin of your fingertips, the backs of your hands, and it made you sigh. Logan, alongside yourself, was to be given this performance of sorts, an edible delicacy that you hadnât even tasted yet. He might as well gauge sweat in the crust, nerved blood in the filling.
It was not that serious, you told yourself. Yet the fact that it was him made it so.Â
Something your mother had said to get a rise out of your tired state the night he had taken you home made you roll your eyes at the mere cantation in your head: âI saw the way he looked at you when he led you through the door, sat at the dining table; Iâm sure he didnât mind your car breaking downâ.Â
The tin was placed into the oven, out of sight, out of mind. It was a little while later when he had stepped around the corner, familiar carpenterâs belt around his waist.Â
âShouldnât cause her any more trouble.â His voice was quiet as he ran a hand through his hair.Â
You turned to face him, gathering utensils and jars dirtied with ingredients and tossing them into the sink. âThanksâlet me get you a drink, hold on.â
Opening the upper cabinet, you hoped he didnât catch the sigh that left your lips seeing the only glasses left lining the back of the wood.Â
But he did, and ever the gentleman, he was at your side with a clear of his throat.
âIâll get it.â It came out in a near whisper, only for you to hear; not the already setting sun, not as a cue for the moon to bleed the kitchen a gentle white.
You let him. You felt the warmth of his figure as it stood close, akin to all the times prior, a hand just above the small of your back, not making contact but close enough, and the other reaching overhead. The glass chased the last streams of sunlight from the kitchen window, and rather than handing it to you, he set it on the countertop, the soft clink deafening in your ears.Â
He repositioned himself so he leaned against the counter, hands splayed behind him atop the surface, gesturing to the oven with a tilt of his head. âHowâs the pie?â
You caught his eyes, hooded hazel, brushed your hands along your apron as a means to ease the wanting to guide his own back to where it was. âIt looks good. Donât know if you want to wait a little longer to eat it hereâif anything you could always take it with you.â
He gave you a smile that was so sincere, so unashamedly forgiving, though for what, you thought, if not to insist you could stay for however long. âI can wait, if itâs alright with you.â
If you did as you wantedâkeep your eyes on hisâyour knees were bound to give underneath you with the way he looked at you, a gentle accepting to waiting alongside you in your kitchen, such a sacred place. âOf course.â
He stayed in place, eyes following as you walked around him to put any last dishes into the sink and leaving them be, not feeling like touching anything else with a smooth finish.Â
âYou can leave those in there,â you told him when you noticed him shift. âRest for a while.ââdirected at him and the dirty dishes. You reached behind yourself to grab the knot at your back, desperate to take the thing off with reasoning much like the pie in the ovenâyou hadnât realized just how tightly you had wound the string.Â
And there he was, ever so reliable, behind you once more as he uttered an âI got itâ under his breath, putting his hands over yours and already beginning to unravel the knot himself.Â
Your previous thought still rang true, like a delicate synth prettily reverberating in your mind: this would be so much easier, bearable, if he were a lover, simply something more than a frequent acquaintance.
And perhaps he heard you, for his hands went to the strap around your neck, fingertips gently grazing against the junctures of your neck and shoulders.
âYou should rest, too,â he mumbled as he lifted the fabric above your head, held it out for you. You took it in your hands, staring down at the fabric, what was left of the sun for the evening slithering through window and lace, joining flour and rich violet.Â
You muttered a âthanksâ, a sigh. âI know.â
The kitchen fell quiet, not silent, for it contained the two of you; your passing breaths and pulsing heart comparable to the clatter of porcelain beneath familiar conversation.
Water from the tap directed your attention to the sink, where he suddenly stood pouring himself the glass, taking a sip; water hitting the sides of the house came like an afterthought.Â
It might as well have been his doing, such perfect timing, with the way he raised his eyebrows in surprise. âDâyou know it was sâposed to rain?â
You shook your head. You took it as an attempt to cover the tension that how hung heavy in the air, a rhythmic tune to combat the beat of your pulse and the itch that resided in your hands.
ââââââââââââââ
Blueberry bubbling warmed in pastry spilled into the wood of the kitchen and his nose; he let out a hum at the smell from where the two of you sat on the floor against the cabinets across from each other, his body next to the oven. He pushed his sleeves up, similar to when he stood at the sink with hands of lavender, from the heat that crept as company to the finished taste.Â
âYou ok with me being the first to taste it?â he asked with a nod in your direction, something adjacent to surprise, or disbelief in his voice.
You furrowed a browââI never saw what you did to that shelf.ââin reference to the hint your mother had made.
âFeel free to take a look for yourself,â he crossed his arms as if to imply he wouldnât be here with you if he hadnât done a perfect job.
You hummed. âI better not have to call you back here in a week, then.â
âI wouldnât mind.â
A flush betrayed your skin; you hated its response. âSo you made it worse, is what Iâm hearing.â
He tongued at his cheek, fighting a smile yet narrowing his eyes and shrugging a shoulder. âDefine âworseâ.â
âItâs definitely what youâll be feeling after you leave without that pie you want so bad,â you said, standing up to check on the oven, adjusting the dish towel that hung from the handle. You let out a small hum at the golden color that blossomed along the crust.Â
You took it out with delicate hands, the metal of the tin clattering with the stovetop.Â
âWeâll let it cool.â A declaration implying more waitâthough he didnât seem to mind, if his following your actions and standing behind you with hooded eyes was any indication.Â
âLooks good.â
You gave him a small, satisfasfied smile, though not necessarily from his words but at the dessert in front of that did, much to your relief, look good. You stayed admiring the work made from your hands to be eaten by them, alongside another whose familiar cigar smoke slowly paired with blueberry; it made a nicer blend than lavender.Â
It was similar to when he had spoken to you first, the smell of other fruits stuck to his clothing enticing you to reach out and distinguish which ones were whereâyou were close to acting upon intrigue. You figured he was too, for he did not moveâexcept for one part you could see out of your peripheral.
His voice was soft as he asked: âIs this okay?â He was referring to the hand smoothing over the countertop to rest next to yours, the skin just barely meeting.
You noddedââYeah.ââhated the breathy delivery of your response; he hadnât even done anything, but you wanted to put the same hands that made a necessity sweet upon him, a blunt want and nothing more than to satiate an ache not riddled in your stomach.Â
His voice was much closer, a little deeper, almost timid in its hushed delivery.Â
âCan I kiss you?â
You didnât hesitate. âYes.âÂ
His kisses were slow, trailing up, up to just below your ear. The hair cut at his cheek left a delicate burn along the skin, yet you leaned your head back to his chest without a second thought.Â
âHere?â His question was asked along the skin of your cheek, your head tilting as if lured, enchanted by his words. One hand set itself on your hip.
You mumbled an âmhmâ, resting a hand atop his own; he draped the one on the counter over yours, lacing the fingers. His fingertips were calloused, a welcomed touch akin to natural skin encasing an apple, rough yet promising.Â
He placed a kiss to your cheek, the corner of your lips; you could feel a small smile stretch across his.
You spoke before he could ask, eyes shut and a gentle nod: âDonât be such a tease.â
He let out an exhale, amused at your words. âMy bad, sweetheart.â
At his lips on yours, you turned around, putting the hand alongside his at your hip to his cheek; he threaded the other in a similar fashion atop the counter. He kissed with a gentle fervor, a low hum coming from his throat when you combed a hand through the hair at the nape of his neck. Denim slotted between your legs, an offering to the lust leaking into your blood.Â
His nose pushed at yours as he tilted his head, quickening to placing pecks to your lips so you could catch the breath he had taken from your lungs. The moon peeking as if with curiosity from behind roaming clouds and lace shrouded his figure in alluring white, accenting the beginnings of a flush to his skin.
He bowed his head to your neck once more, biting the skin and leaving a kiss in its place.Â
With fog from his touch contaminating your brain, the blueberry baked into pastry snuck into your nose.Â
Logan put his hands underneath your thighs and lifted your body without hesitation, pressing a kiss to your sternum and mumbling into the skin a claim that he hoped you wouldnât mind him indulging in something sweeter.
And you didnât, laying back as he bit and kissed at skin like a man starved, holding you down against your sheets with gentle drags of his palms. The insides of your thighs burned, sweat dotting the fabric underneath you; he insisted a second with praise for the first.
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GUYS I NEEDDDD TO EXPERIENCE THE COWBOY HAT RULEEEEEEE



heâs a good time, cowboy casanova!
pair: cowboy!logan howlett x fem!reader
wc: 9.4k
contains: 18+ SMUT MDNI, alternate universe/no powers, swearing, drinking, smoking, probably some inaccuracies about ranch life idk i haven't been around a horse in like two years, logan working a lasso yes god, age gap (Logan is mid-40s, reader is early-20s), THE COWBOY HAT RULE RAAAHHH, nasty dirty talk, i was so horny for kissing when i was writing this jesus, p in v, unprotected sex (do as sex ed tells you, not as i write), semi-public sex, riding, creampie, some emotional constipation cause itâs me, porn with a little too much plot, no use of y/n.
natâs note: another purely self indulgent work...i just fucking love cowboys what can i say. it's practically ingrained in me by this point. logan would never dance but like who cares he's my barbie i can make him do whatever i want! kisses <3
dividers by angel @saradika-graphics!
a cowboy and the governorâs daughter walk into a barn...
The ranch is alive like you've never seen before, almost every acre lit up in celebration of your father's recent inauguration.
Twinkling lights strung around the barn's ceiling cast a warm orange glow all around you, flickering like fireflies on a summer night.
People are everywhereâlaughing, mingling, drinking. Their faces both familiar and new, dressed in everything from head-to-toe denim to their Sunday best.
The lively music from the band floats through the space, couples on the makeshift dance floor twirling to the familiar twang of an acoustic guitar.
You take it all in from your spot against the wall, drink in hand as your eyes scan the room.
You did your share of mingling earlier in the evening, greeting the higher-upâs in your city with hugs and thanks.
You posed for pictures thatâll be splashed across the front pages of Mondayâs paper, listened to your fatherâs speech as you stood by his side with a smile.
This is the first moment you've gotten to yourself since the ball started, one you've spent in content silence while enjoying the perks of an open bar.
"What's a pretty thing like you doing all by your lonesome?"
The honeyed rasp of a voice filtering in from your left paired with the jingling sound of spurs against the soft ground grabs your attention.
At first, you turn ready to greet a stray boutique or feedstore owner you may have missed earlier. Youâre pleasantly surprised to see Marie sauntering towards you instead, a bright grin on her face that makes you smile right back.
Marie was one of the first people you met after moving to Texas at the beginning of your father's campaign, and you've only gotten closer since she started as a ranch hand down at Blackbird.
Her unruly red curls spill out from under her Stetson, the bouncy strands swinging in time with the white fringe of her show-shirt as she opens her arms.
"Thought you might have gotten lost in all the fancy folk," she teases, nearly crushing you with the strength of her hug.
You laugh as you hug her back, the warmth of her embrace a welcome interruption to your moment of peace and quiet. Her scent wraps around you, the familiar dust and lavender that's seeped into her clothes.
"Definitely not lost," you say, stepping back to meet her gaze. "Just taking it all in."
Marie smirks, leaning a shoulder against the wall beside you, crossing her arms as she watches the crowd.
"Sure is a good night for it," she says, glancing over at you with a glint of mischief in her eyes. "Lookin' for anyone in particular? A nice night cap?"
You snort, taking another sip of your drink. Marie has always been more invested in your love life than you, hand picking guys from around town she deems worthy enough of your attention.
You know she means well, and it's almost as endearing as it is pesky, so you let her play matchmaker from time to time.
âI donât need a night cap,â you laugh, shaking your head sluggishly. "Iâm perfectly fine spending tonight alone."
Before Marie can respond, a stir from outside filters in. Loud cheers and hollers, hooves beating against dirt, the distinct whistle of a lasso slicing through the air.
Marie practically squeals, excitedly bouncing on the balls of her feet as she peers through the barn doors. âItâs starting!â
You donât have time to ask what âitâ is before sheâs snatching up your wrist and turning to haul you outside.
"Marie! Where the hell are we going?" You practically trip over your own feet trying to keep up with her, your drink splashing up against the rim of your glass precariously.
Marie laughs as she pulls you out into the cool evening air, her boots crunching on the gravel as she drags you toward the commotion. âYouâll see!â
You weave through the crowd forming around the training ring, Marieâs grip still tight around your wrist as she pushes toward the front until youâre right up against the railing.Â
You peer over it, eyes adjusting to the floodlights surrounding the ring, illuminating the clouds of dust kicked up by the different ranch hands perched on horses.
A few riders take turns showing off their skills, each of them in the same show-shirt as Marie, expertly swinging lassos and wrangling cattle with practiced ease.
The energy is contagious, and you find yourself smiling, soaking in the excitement pulsing through the crowd.
Marie leans closer, her voice low and laced with something knowing. âJust wait for it, honey. Itâs about to get good.â
You give her a puzzled look, but sheâs already grinning ear to ear, her attention fully focused on a new rider that chargers into the ring.
You follow her gaze, and your breath catches in your throat.
He rides in like he owns the place, his coal black horse cutting through the fog of dirt like a shadow, sleek and powerful beneath him.
A black Stetson sits low over his face, casting shadows that only add to the rugged allure of his jawline, a jawline that could cut glass.Â
As he leans forward to grab the rope tossed at him by one of the other riders, his muscles flex, a kind of strength that isnât there for show, but for real work.
His show-shirt is stretched over the width of his chest, over broad shoulders that look like they were carved from stone, made for lifting hay bales and hundred pound feed bags.
The sleeves rolled up to expose forearms dusted with dark hair and more than a few scars. His gloved hands rest on the reins with an ease that tells you heâs more than familiar on a saddle.
Heâs not the flashiest rider, but thereâs something commanding in his presence as he races his horse towards the steer, lasso circling high above his head.
He doesnât even look like heâs trying to put on a showâhe is the show.
Marieâs grip on your wrist tightens, and she leans in again, her voice loud enough to be heard over the crowd.
âThatâs Logan,â she says, practically glowing with pride. âHeâs the foreman down at Blackbird, might just be the best damn cowboy in the whole state.â
You blink, hardly able to tear your gaze away from Logan, whoâs riding like heâs part of the horse, one seamless, commanding figure cutting through the chaos in the ring.Â
His focus is sharp, and as his lasso snaps through the air, catching the steers back leg in a clean loop, the crowd erupts in applause.
A satisfied smirk tugs at the corner of his mouth, a glimmer of amusement flashing beneath the shadow of his hat.
Marie nudges you, her grin widening as she catches the look on your face. âTold you he was worth watching,â she teases, winking. âAnd heâs got a bit of a reputation for beinâ hard to impressâone of those strong, silent types, yâknow?â
You roll your eyes, but your heart beats a little faster as Logan turns his horse, his gaze sweeping over the crowd before it lands on you.
Your cheeks warm under his stare, trying to subtly make out the different features of his face from this far. His head tilts just slightly, as if heâs sizing you up from across the ring.
For a second, it feels like the two of you are the only ones there. The cheers from the audience dulling into white noise all around you, everything in your peripheral blurring togetherâeverything but him.
âHeâs goodâŠâ Your voice has gone light, airy as you watch Logan turn his horse back to lead the steer into the ring's stall with all the others.Â
Marie's grin only widens as she leans against the post, clever eyes trained on the side of your face. "You still 'perfectly find spendin' the night alone'?"
You don't respond, too busy watching the strong muscle of Logan's back ripple under his shirt as he rides out of the ringâto your complete dismayâalmost as fast as he rode in.
You're only snapped out of your trance when you can't make out his silhouette any longer. The crowd around you dissipates, filtering back into the barn while you're stuck to the fence straining your eyes for broad shoulders and a black cowboy hat.
âShowâs over, sugar.â Marie says with a snort, gently tugging you away from the post. âCome on, letâs get you another drink.â
You lost your company ten minutes ago, but you knew you didnât stand a chance when Remy found the two of you huddled at the bar.
Sheepishly coming up to Marie with his hat in his hand, pressing it to his chest as he asked her for a dance.
You waved them off with a smile, assuring Marie you'd be fine on your own for a couple songs.
It gave you a chance to step out for some fresh air, to lean against the side of the barn and sneak a cigarette while your father was busy dancing with the town's best real estate agent money can buy.
You take a slow drag, eyes peering up at the stars so you can trace the constellations. You think that this might just be your favorite part of the move.Â
Nevada has never been known for its clear skies, you can count the times youâd been able to see the stars on one hand.
You still remember the first night after you settled into your new house, the stress of the move and your fathers inauguration weighed on you enough that sleep was hard to come by.Â
You finally crept out of bed around three, climbing over your balcony to perch yourself on the roof, carton of cigarettes and a lighter shoved in the waistband of your shorts.
The first time you looked out over the horizon was like stepping into a whole new world.
The stars had never felt so close, hung through the air like diamonds. So bright against the vast nothingness that stretched out beyond the too-big ranch house on the too-many acres the state appointed you and your father.Â
It was like you could almost reach out and touch them, pluck them from the sky like fruit off a tree.
Youâd been used to the city lights, the constant hum of noise that swallowed up the stars, but here? It was different.Â
The air smelled of dust and rainwater, and the silence was louder than anything youâd ever known.
You remember the deep, quiet hum of the night, almost like it was waiting for you to catch up, to adjust to the new rhythm of the world you were suddenly a part of.
It was a moment of peace, a brief stillness from the mess crowding your head, and you found comfort in that isolation.
You take another long drag, letting the smoke curl around your fingers, the orange embers glowing bright against the darkness.
As the faint scent of tobacco mixes with the cool air, you find that same sense of peace returning, the same stillness settling over your chest.
You tilt your head back to rest on the barn, eyes fluttering shut as you let the crisp breeze lull you into its serenity.
"Those'll kill you, y'know."
A voice comes from just over your shoulder, warm and low. A smooth drawl ringing out from the shadows.
You slip your eyes open, expecting to see one of the older ranch hands or maybe even a city official looking to lecture the governor's kid.Â
It takes you a second, but the black Stetson and squared shoulders register quickly enoughâLogan.Â
You nearly swallow your tongue, eyes widening as you take in the way he leans against the barn a few feet away from you. You donât know how long heâs been standing there, watching you.Â
The moonlight dances across his face, highlighting the rough line of his jaw and the confident tilt of his smirk.
âI didnât think cowboys were oneâs for giving lectures.â Youâre shocked at the stillness of your voice, the beat of your heart picking up the tiniest bit.
Loganâs smirk only widens as he pushes off the wall, gravel crunching under his boots as he makes his way over to you, slow and deliberate. Heâs still dressed in the same outfit from before, a lasso still coiled in one hand.
He comes to a stop next to you, leaning his shoulder just inches from yours. "Not usually. But when I see a pretty girl puffin' away on somethin' that's bound to ruin her, I make an exception."
You smirk, lifting the cigarette to your lips again just to make a point, even as your pulse jumps a little under his gaze. "Guess we all have our vices.â You say, blowing out the smoke slowly, watching the way his gaze tracks its lazy drift.
Loganâs eyes trail back to yours, and you can see the color of them now that heâs closer. A mix of different greens and browns fading together, like a forest in the thick of summer.
The lightest dusting of freckles decorate the bridge of his nose, trailing along his cheeks until they disappear under his beard, a product of being out in the sun so often.
Youâre struck by how pretty he is, all long lashes and red lips.
Well, pretty for a cowboy anyway.
âYou plan on sharinâ?â
You canât stop the laugh that bubbles from your chest, brow raising skeptically. âThatâs a little hypocritical, donât you think?â
Logan just shrugs, a lazy half-smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. âI reckonâ itâs rude to let a lady smoke alone.â
You huff lightly, reaching into the pocket of your dress. You flick the top of your Marlboros open, slipping a cigarette out and offering it to Logan silently.Â
He takes it, his fingers brushing against yours enough to send a spark through you. It travels up your arm and all around your shoulders to seep down through your entire body, resting in your stomach to swirl through the heat simmering there.
âGot a light?â He asks, words muffled around the filter.
You roll your eyes, but reach back into your pocket regardless. Logan leans closer as you flip your zippo open, taking his hat off to cover the side of his face, blocking the flame from the lazy breeze.
Your heart stutters in your chest as he nears closer. You didnât expect heâd want you to light it for him. You will your hand to steady as you raise the flame to the tip, holding it close enough that the small light illuminates his face.
The intoxicating mix of leather and musk invades your senses. You fight the urge to lean into it entirely, to close the gap.
When the flame flickers and catches the end of his cigarette, Logan pulls back, taking a languid drag, the embers glowing between his lips.
His eyes don't leave yours as he exhales deeply, the smoke curling from his lips in slow tendrils. You canât tell if itâs the nicotine or the way heâs looking at you thatâs making your head spin.
You break eye contact, feeling the flush creeping up your neck, and lean back against the barn to cool yourself off. Logan leans beside you, a comfortable silence settling over the two of you, just the soft crackling of cigarettes and distant music filling the space between.
Logan puts his hat back on, his voice breaking through the quiet as he does. âYouâre Governor Wrightâs daughter, ain't you?â
You nod slowly, exhaling another long plume of smoke. Itâs still weird hearing it out loud. âI am.â
Logan hums, turning his head to face you again. The silver moonlight catching the glint in his eye.
âSaw your picture in the paper.â His gaze rakes from the top of your head, all the way down to the tips of your boots. âLooked real nice.â
The air feels heavier as Loganâs eyes travel over you, lingering just long enough to make your skin tingle, before meeting your gaze again. His eyes hold a hint of amusement, the green of them darker than before. The heat swims through you faster, stronger.
âCongratulations.â He adds, almost like an afterthought. A quick pivot to take some attention away from how his eyes swept over your body so shamelessly.
You snort before you can stop yourself. If you had a dollar for every time youâve heard that over the past few weeks. âYeah,â you say, kicking at some rocks near your feet. âThank you.â
You can see the way Loganâs brow raises out of the corner of your eye, his gaze burning a hole along your profile.
âDonât sound too excited,â he comments, exhaling lazily. âThat why youâre hidinâ out here?â
You shrug, leaning back against the barn and tapping your cigarette to shake off some ash. âMaybe I just like the quiet,â you say. âOr maybe Iâm avoiding another round of âhow proud are you of your daddyâ small talk.â
Logan stays quiet, and you feel the overwhelming need to explain yourself. A need to fill the silence, like heâs some kind of magnet that soothes the truth from people.
You sigh, turning your eyes to the dark sky again. âIâm happy for my dad, of course I am butâŠâ You trail off, searching for the right words. âItâs just a lot.â
He chuckles lightly, a low rumble that feels more real than the sounds of laughter from inside the barn. âHell, I donât blame you,â he says, his eyes flicking up to the stars too. âNothinâ wrong with takin' a breather now and then.â
You both stand there in comfortable silence, the night stretching out around you, as vast and open as the sky above. You let yourself study Logan out of the corner of your eye, noticing the way he seems at ease, like heâs as much a part of this land as the grass and stars.
Finally, he looks over, and you feel that sharp gaze settle on you again. âYou keep starinâ like that,â he says, a teasing note creeping into his voice, âIâm gonna start thinkinâ youâre more interested in somethin' other than the stars.â
Your mouth drops open slightly, heat rushing to your ears as you search for something to say.
Loganâs smirk widens as he catches the way your breath stutters, and for a moment, the silence is thick, the air between you charged.Â
You force a laugh, trying to play it off, but itâs weak, and you can feel the heat creeping up your neck again. "Iâ"
Back inside the barn, the band switches songs, saving you from your embarrassment. A softer melody floats through the air, slow and sweet as molasses. Itâs muffled enough that it sounds almost hazy, like a soundtrack to the most wonderful dreams.
Logan turns to watch the shadows move in the light spilling through the open doors. Couples pairing off, taking to the dancefloor. All warm embraces and slow moving circles, swaying to the gentle beat.
He turns back to you, running his thumb over the coarse lasso in his hand. âCare for a dance?â
You raise your brow, skepticism written all over your face. âI donât really do that.â
Logan doesnât back down, tilting his head with an easy grin. âSeems like a waste not dancinâ in a dress like that.â
You canât fight the smile that tugs your lips up, shaking your head with a quiet laugh as you peer down at the nice floral fabric of your sundress. The wind makes it swish along your sides, the flowy fabric swaying over the knee of your boots.
âMaybe another time, Logan.â You try to ignore how good his name feels rolling off your tongue.
He takes one last drag off his cigarette before heâs stubbing it out on the worn leather of his belt and slipping the butt in his jean pocket. Itâs both the strangest and most endearing thing youâve ever seenâa cowboy that refuses to litter.
âWell Iâm gonna have to insist.â He crosses his arms over his chest, straining the fabric around his biceps. Thereâs a challenge in his eyes now, a dare.
âOh, youâre insisting, are you?â You repeat doubtfully, lolling your head to the side languidly, your hair flowing with it. âAnd how are you gonna do that?â
Logan doesnât answer with words, just raises his arm to start twirling his lasso through the air with a smug grin. He circles once, twice, three times before a deft flick of his wrist sends the rope across the way to you.Â
It slips over your shoulders, sliding down to catch on the curve of your hips.
You raise a brow, reluctant smile still playing on your lips. âDo you carry this thing with you everywhere you go?â
Logan cocks a brow, tugging on his end of the rope so it tightens around you, forcing you a step closer.
You stumble forward with a soft laugh, eyes darting up to meet Logan's. The lasso feels snug, but not tight enough to hurt, just enough to let you know heâs in control, and the thought sends a spark straight down to your core.
âYou sure you donât dance?â He tugs you a few steps closer, his smirk only deepening as he effortlessly reels you in.
You bite your lip to stifle a smile, shaking your head. âYou sure are persistent, Iâll give you that.â
Logan doesnât wait for you to say anything else, instead taking that final step forward. His grip tightens slightly on the lasso, pulling you closer until thereâs barely any space between you.Â
You can feel the warmth of his body through the thin fabric of your dress, his chest rising and falling with each slow, deliberate breath.
âSome would say itâs my best quality,â he teases quietly, voice dropping to something lower, like gravel and velvet. âNow, you gonna fight me the whole way through, or are we gonna dance?â
You glance up at him, your chest fluttering in spite of yourself. A thousand lame excuses run through your mind, but all you can manage is a breathless laugh, the sound caught somewhere between amusement and nerves.
âI guess I donât have much of a choice,â you murmur, hands tentatively coming to rest on his shoulders. âBut donât say I didnât warn you.â
Loganâs smile softens, his hand slinking around your hips to loosen the lasso, letting it slip down your legs so you can step out of it.
Big hands settle on your waist, brushing the soft fabric of your dress, sending a fresh wave of warmth through you. His touch is firm and gentle all at once, guiding you effortlessly into an easy sway.
The moment you fall into the rhythm of the music, your body moves naturally against Loganâs, and you can feel the charge between you intensify with each step.
His boots scrape against the dirt as he leads you in a slow, almost languid circle. Your feet match his without thinking, the sound of your boots in sync with the soft country tune playing from the barn.
âSee? Not so bad, huh?â His voice is low, a soft whisper against the backdrop of the music.
You nod slowly, your fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt, the warmth of his body seeping into your skin. The rough scrape of his jeans against your bare legs sends a delicious shiver skittering up your spine.
âNot so bad,â you agree, your voice quieter now, the playful edge slipping away as something deeper stirs between you.
You tilt your head up, breath catching in your chest when you find him already looking down at you. His lips quirk up slightly, but thereâs a new intensity there now, something sharper than the teasing glimmer from before.
"Logan," you murmur, but your voice is barely a whisper, lost to the night air.
His free hand slides up the length of your spine, trailing along your neck until heâs cupping the side of your face. His thumb grazes your cheekbone with a gentleness you never thought men like him to be capable of.
The space between you shrinks even more as Logan dips his head, his nose brushing against yours in a featherlight touch that sends a shiver down your spine
âYou gonna tell me to stop?â He murmurs, his lips so close now you can feel the warmth of his breath ghosting over your skin.
Your throat works to form words, but theyâre gone, stolen by the way his hands slide a fraction lower on your waist, pulling you flush against him.Â
Your breath hitches again, and without thinking, you close the space, lips pressing against his, soft at first, unsure. Logan deepens it almost immediately, tugging you impossibly closer.
Itâs tenderâachingly so. Loganâs lips are surprisingly soft, he tastes like top-shelf whiskey and your Marlboro Golds. They mold to yours with a gentle pressure, warm and inviting. His hand on your face tilts your head slightly, angling you just right as his thumb continues to trace soft circles over your cheek.
The warmth of it spreads through you, settling low in your stomach, and you think you could stay like this the whole night, wrapped in the quiet safety of him.
All too soon, Loganâs pulling away. You whine pathetically, lips chasing his own. Youâd be embarrassed if it wasn't for the pure need coursing through you.
âYou were right,â he mutters lowly, running his thumb along the slick expanse of your bottom lip. âThis is a hell of a lot better than dancinâ.â
âShut up.â You drag him back down by the fistfuls of his shirt, your own lips hungrily seeking out his again.
This kiss is different, something filthier, something messier. Itâs like a dam breaking to let a rush of water break free, all the tension unraveling itself as you meet again.
The gentle tilt of Loganâs head changes, and when his teeth catch your bottom lip with just enough pressure, your knees feel dangerously close to buckling.
His hand slides down from your cheek, skimming your jawline before tangling into the hair at the nape of your neck. His tongue sweeps past your lips, and the taste of whiskey and smoke is heady, stronger, dizzying.
Loganâs mouth moves against yours with a confidence that makes your head spin, like he knows exactly what heâs doing to you.
You let out a soft, involuntary sound, and that only spurs him on, the hand in your hair tightening as he presses you back against the rough wood of the barn.
It digs into your body harshly, scratching at the bare skin of your shoulders and backs of your thighs. You hardly care.
Your hands come up to tangle in his hair, knocking his hat off so you can tug him closer as your tongues slide together lewdly. Logan groans into your mouth at the sting of his scalp, you can feel the rumble of it in your bones.Â
His beard scratches against your chin and cheeks so deliciously that you canât help but imagine where else it might rub your skin red and raw. The thought alone has a shudder running through you, your hips arching off the barn unconsciously.
The subtle grind when your hips slot together is enough to have Loganâs grip tightening around your hips. His fingers flexing where theyâre still tangled in your hair. You moan softly at the hard length tenting his jeans, pressing insistently against your lower stomach, big even trapped in the rough denim.
Your body reacts to the thick plane of heat almost viscerally, your pussy aching with the need to be filled.
When you finally break apart, itâs only because neither of you can breathe.
Logan pulls back just enough to meet your eyes, his forehead resting against yours, his chest rising and falling in heavy breaths that match your own. His pupils are blown wide, dark and intense. You dazedly think back to the sleek coat of his horse, black as ink and shining under the rings lights.Â
His lips are an angry red and slightly swollen, glistening in the pale moonlight, and the sight of himâdisheveled and wantingâsends another wave of heat blooming through your core to leak wet and sticky in your panties.
âYour daddy would shoot me between the eyes if he caught us like this, darlinâ.â
You hide your pleased smile in the crook of his neck, trailing soft kisses from his jaw to his ear. âThen we should find somewhere a little more private, shouldnât we?â
Logan groans, hands bunching the fabric of your dress in tight fists as your lips brush against the lobe of his ear with every word, teasing. âI reckonâ we should.â
You step back, fingers trailing down to toy with the shiny belt buckle sitting pretty on his waist. âLead the way.â
Logan smirks, tongue swiping along his bottom lip. âYes maâam.â
He bends to grab his hat from where it lays at his feet, pushing his hair away from his eyes before dropping it back on his head. His hand finds the small of your back, turning to lead you away from the barn.
You try not to notice how well it fits.Â
Turns out, âsomewhere a little more privateâ is just another barn. This one filled with stray mountains of hay and empty horse stalls instead of the watchful eyes of partygoers.
You canât bring yourself to care, not when Loganâs got you pressed to the closed door, his hands roaming down your body like heâs memorizing every curve, every dip.Â
âChrist, youâre somethinâ else,â Logan mutters, his voice thick with want as his lips ghost along the side of your neck, leaving a trail of open-mouthed kisses that make your knees shake.
His breath is hot against your ear when he adds, âBet youâre soaked for me already, arenât you, darlinâ?â
The rough pads of his fingers drag along your bare thighs as he hikes your dress higher, the fabric bunching at your waist. The cool air kisses your skin, but itâs nothing compared to the heat between your legs as his palms knead the soft flesh.Â
You bite your lip to stifle the embarrassing moan that threatens to escape, but he catches the sound anyway, pressing a cocky grin to the side of your cheek.
âCâmon, donât get shy on me now.â His hand slides between your thighs, calloused fingers brushing against the damp fabric of your panties.Â
The low groan that escapes him when he feels how wet you are is pure sin, vibrating against your neck as his fingers trace over the damp cotton. âFuck, barely touched you and youâre already drippinâ for me.â
âLoganââ You start, but your words dissolve into a sharp gasp as he hooks a finger beneath the fabric, pulling it to the side.
The first drag of his finger through your slick folds has your head falling back against the wall with a dull thud. A high moan falls from your parted lips, embarrassing and needy as your thighs clench around his wrist.
Logan just hums, pressing a kiss to the corner of your slack mouth. âIs she hurtinâ real bad, baby?â he asks softly, his thumb pressed over your pulsing clit. âJust gotta give you some sweet kisses and she gets all worked up, huh?â
Your only response is a breathless whimper, your fingers clutching at his shoulders for stability as he teases you with slow, torturous circles around your clit.
His thick pointer finger slides through the slick seam of your pussy, catching on your dripping entrance before itâs sinking to the knuckle in one slow thrust.Â
You arch into him, your hips rocking instinctively to take him deeper, desperate for more. His other hand comes up to cradle your face, his thumb brushing along your cheek as his gaze locks onto yours.Â
The intensity in his eyes makes your stomach flip, your breath hitching as he watches every little expression cross your face.
âThatâs it, darlinâ,â he coaxes, sliding his finger in and out at a maddeningly slow pace. âLook at you, so fuckinâ beautiful. Takinâ my fingers so good, baby.â
âPlease,â you gasp, the need in your voice making his smirk widen.
âPlease what?â he teases, curling his finger inside you and grinning when you nearly sob at the sensation. âGotta tell me what you want, sweetheart.â
You whimper, thighs trembling as you manage to stutter out, âKissâŠkiss me.â
Logan groans, brows twitching up like that wasnât what he was expecting to fall from your slick, kiss bitten lips. He doesnât waste a second, leaning in to capture your mouth with his in a kiss thatâs equal parts desperate and bruising.Â
His lips part against yours, tongue sliding in to meet yours, hot and eager, as he sinks a second finger inside your clenching hole.Â
The kiss deepens, becoming a rhythm of its own, each stroke of his tongue matching the languid thrust of his fingers.
Logan's lips move hungrily against yours, his pace never faltering even as his fingers curl inside you, searching, teasing, untilâthere.
The moment he brushes against that spot, your back arches off the barn wall, a sharp gasp tearing from your throat. He grins against your lips, breaking the kiss just long enough to murmur, âThere she is.â
The slick sound of his fingers pumping into you fills the quiet barn, mingling with your soft, breathy whimpers. His thumb circles your clit with devastating precision, each pass of his fingers inside you coaxing your body closer to the edge.
âYouâre squeezinâ me so tight, honey,â he groans, his voice rough and dripping with praise. âCan feel how close you are. Bet youâre gonna fall apart for me so pretty, arenât ya?â
You shake your head, your breath coming in soft pants. âNo.â Your hand snakes down to his wrist, halting his movements. âWanna finish with you inside me.â
Logan stills, his breath catching as your words hang heavy in the air. His fingers stay buried inside you, the slight curl of them making your thighs quake as his eyes search yours.
The fire there burns hotter now, feral and barely restrained.Â
âYeah?â The raw hunger in his voice makes your pulse spike. âYou want me inside you, huh? Wanna feel me stretch you open, baby?â
You nod eagerly, your chest heaving as his words fan the flames of your desire.Â
âAlright,â he mutters darkly, voice gone low and smoky. âIâll give you what you want.â
Logan slips his fingers from the warm grip of your pussy, the sudden emptiness stealing all the air from your lungs. You miss the stretch almost immediately, clenching around nothing with a soft moan.
He lifts his hand between you, his fingers glistening with your wetness in the dim light. âLook at that,â he says softly, almost in awe, before slipping his fingers into his mouth and groaning at the taste.
âFuck,â you whisper, your cheeks burning at the sight.Â
Logan catches your gaze, a wicked smirk spreading across his face as he leans in close. âCâmon,â he whispers softly against the skin of your neck, hands slipping around the backs of your thighs and squeezing gently. âUp.â
You hitch your legs up around his waist, a soft breath escaping you at the way he lifts you with ease, like you weigh nothing.
You canât help but run your hands over the thick muscle of his biceps as he walks you further into the barn, lips trailing wet kisses along where his shirtâs top button popped open, exposing more of his tan skin to your greedy eyes.
Logan falls back against a knocked over bale of hay, you feel the hot length of his hard cock grinding over the slick fabric of your panties as he positions you over his lap.
You waste no time, stray pieces of hay digging into your knees as your trembling hands reach for his buckle. Your fingers brush over the cool metal as you fumble sliding the worn leather through his belt loops.
Logan just watches you, leaning back on his forearms with a smirkâcool as ever.
Once his belt is undone and his zipper dragged down, you shove at his jeans, watching with a mix of anticipation and desire as his cock springs free, thick and heavy and already leaking for you.Â
Youâve heard the expression âhung like a horseâ countless times. You always thought it was a gross exaggeration, until now.
Loganâs hand glides down his stomach to start stroking himself lazily, his eyes never leaving yours. âBeen hard since the second I laid eyes on you tonight. Could barely keep my hands to myself, watchinâ you all dolled up like that. Drove me fuckinâ crazy.â
Your mouth waters with the need to taste, eyes tracking the thick line of pre-come leaking from his flushed tip.Â
The phantom ache in your jaw almost has you dropping to your stomach right there, but you know that your time here is limited, and you need Logan inside of you more than anything.
You lean back, lifting your legs so you can shimmy your soaked panties down and off, tossing them behind you haphazardly the same way you tossed his belt.
His eyes are locked onto yours as you crawl back towards him, situating yourself over his lap all over again. You take a steadying breath as you reach for his cock, nearly moaning at the heft of it in your hand, at the near scalding touch of his silky skin against your palm.
âHang on, baby.â Loganâs hands fall to your hips, stopping you just as the tip of his cock brushes against your dripping pussy. âYou wanna ride, you gotta look the part.â
He drags his hands lower, calloused palms rough against the soft skin of your thighs. Itâs enough to make you shiver, hips twitching down with the desperate need to be filled.
âGot the boots,â he murmurs idly, thumbs sliding along the back of your thighs. âJust need the hat.â
Logan reaches up to grab his hat by the crown, pulling it off his head to drop it on yours.
You left out a soft breath, feeling the worn felt settle on the top of your head, still warm from his own.
Itâs too big, slipping down to shadow your eyes. Loganâs gaze darkens as he adjusts it, tipping it back just enough to frame your face.
âMuch better,â he says, flicking the brim once before his hands fall back to your hips. âAlright cowgirl, give it to me good.â
The words shoot straight to your core, igniting something wild and reckless inside you.
You bite your lip, spurred on by the way his hands knead the meat of your hips. Not forcing or pushing, just two steady weights as you slowly start to sink down.
It's nearly torturous, but in the best way possible. The stretch of each inch a pleasant burn as your hips slot against his after what feels like an eternity.
âFuck.â Logan grits out, his hands tightening on your hips as you settle, giving yourself a moment to adjust to the overwhelming fullness.Â
Your body trembles, a soft whimper escaping your lips as you slowly begin to move, rolling your hips in slow, deliberate circles.
Loganâs eyes track every movement, darkened with need, a quiet groan slipping from him as his hands slide lower, gripping your ass, urging you to pick up the pace.
âThatâs it, darlinâ,â he murmurs, his voice husky. âTakinâ it all so good.â
His praise only encourages you, and you lift yourself up before sinking back down, your hands gripping the scratchy fabric of his shirt for leverage.
The feeling of him filling you up, stretching you with every downward movement, makes your head swim, the pressure building in your core.
The barn is filled with the sounds of skin slapping together lewdly, with the wet gush of your pussy leaking around the base of his cock messily. It has your ears burning, shame and arousal a heady mix in your lower belly.
Loganâs hips start to rise from the barn floor, snapping up to meet yours with every bounce. You can feel him deeper like this, brushing against places that make your legs shake with pleasure.Â
Youâre dangerously close to the edge already, a mess from all the teasing earlier. But from the way Loganâs muscles flex and tense beneath you, you can tell he is too.
âGoddamn,â he growls, his hands moving to grip your thighs, helping you bounce on top of him impossibly faster. âYou feel so fuckinâ good, baby, so fucking perfect. Donât stop.â
His words make your head spin, the filthy praise sending a fresh wave of heat pooling in your belly. You canât hold back the moans spilling from your lips, each thrust pushing you closer to the edge.
Your hands scramble for the front of his shirt, tugging and pulling until itâs loose enough to show off the toned muscle of his chest.
You rake your nails through the dark hair decorating his skin, hardly paying any attention to the brand burned into the skin across his left pec.
"Tell me how it feels," he groans, his voice dark and commanding. "Tell me how good Iâm makinâ you feel."
"So good," you manage to gasp, your voice breaking as he grinds against that perfect spot inside you. "Logan, Iâ"
âYouâre close,â he rasps, his grip on your hip tightening as he drives into you harder. âI can feel you, baby. So fuckinâ close. Gonna come for me, arenât ya? Gonna milk my cock like a good girl?â
Youâre too far gone to answer, your body trembling as the coil in your stomach clenches, tighter and tighter. Your head lolls back to the ceiling, eyes fluttering shut as you near the edge.
"Câmon honey," Logan groans, his thumb finding your clit again, circling it in time with his thrusts. âCome for me, let it all fuckinâ out.â
You're helpless to deny him, the thick stretch of his cock paired with the gentle pressure of his thumb on your clit tightening your body like a bowstring threatening to snap.
 âLoganâoh GodâLogan!â Your orgasm crashes over you, leaving you trembling and gasping as your walls shake around him.
Loganâs hips stutter, his rhythm faltering as he groans low in his throat. âGoddamn,â he growls, his voice wrecked. âSo fuckinâ perfect, squeezinâ me so tightâfuckââ
With a few more rough thrusts, he buries himself as deep as he can go, his body going rigid against yours as he finds his own release, groaning your name like itâs the only word he knows.
You slump onto him gracelessly, your body spent and trembling as you bury your face in the crook of his neck. His cock jumps and pulses inside you, sending little aftershocks through your sensitive core as you feel the slick spray of his come painting your walls.
The rough fabric of his shirt feels oddly comforting on the overheated skin of your cheek as you rest your head on his chest, trying to catch your breath.
The brand catches your eye again, more pronounced now that the wiry hair dusted along his chest lays flush, slick with a thin sheen of sweat.
You raise your hand, gently tracing over the raised skin, feeling the rough texture under your fingertips. A curved âXâ scarred right over his heart.Â
The same âXâ that was embroidered on the front of Marieâs shirt, that hangs above the doors of the very barn you lay in, thatâs scattered all throughout the property.
You read once that not all cowboys choose the brand, only the most loyal to the ranch. A kind of fierce loyalty that knows no bounds, that has no limitsâit may be the only loyalty most will ever know.
You think back to your grandmother sitting you down at her weathered kitchen table a few days before your father and you made the move. The stern talking to she gave you felt silly at the time, useless information that youâd never actually need.
Now that you're here, her words ring in your ears for the first time in months, blaring and unavoidable.
âDonât go and get mixed up in any cowboy business, honey. Theyâll never love you more than the life, youâll always be in the rearview mirror.â
Logan takes your hand in his, bringing it from his chest to his lips for a quick kiss before pointedly lowering it to his jean clad thigh. You can feel the way his fingers flex around your wrist, telling.
You swallow hard, the air in the barn suddenly feeling thick and heavy.
You're pushing yourself to your feet before you even realize what you're doing, ignoring the dull ache as his spent cock slips from inside you.
Logan hisses at the sensation, but he's pushing himself to his feet all the same. You're dying to sneak a peek at the look on his face, but you refuse to turn to him.
Maybe out of shame, maybe out of fear for what you might find if you do.
You straighten the wrinkled fabric of your dress, trying in vain to make yourself look as half as presentable as you did before walking into this barn.
The distant sound of a zipper being tugged up and the whisper of denim against denim catches your attention. Your eyes flick to the doors, your brain going a million miles a minute as you consider your options.
You could always beat him to it. You could walk out right now and pretend this never happened, avoid Blackbird like the plague for the rest of your fathers political career.
You doubt you'd ever see Logan outside these fences, it would be so easy to forget.
You shift on your feet, lip caught between your teeth. The sweet ache between your legs only matches the one in growing your chest, all those good feelings sour at the thought of walking away.
Against your better judgment, you turn back to him.Â
Loganâs already looking at you, hands busy with slipping his belt back into place.
Youâve always been good at reading people, at gauging what they might be feeling, but as your eyes scan along the flushed skin of his face, you find yourself unable to describe what you see swirling in his eyes.
âWhen will I see you again?â Itâs weak, barely a whisper. You want to kick yourself for sounding so small, for getting so caught up in a man you hardly know.
Logan lets out a soft breath, hands coming to rest on his hips as he searches for something to say. âWhenever you have a reason to I reckon'.â
The words hang heavy in the air between you.
His answer is honest, unpolishedâjust like him. Something about it hits you deeper than you expect, a bittersweet sting that tightens your chest.
Itâs not a perfect answer, but itâs something.Â
You try to stomp down all the feelings of hope filling your mind, pointedly ignoring the eruption of butterflies in your stomach.
âWell if thatâs the case,â you say slowly, eyes never leaving Loganâs as you step closer. âThen I guess you better keep these.â
You reach around his waist to slip your panties in the back pocket of his jeans, patting the denim a few times for good measure before you step away again.
âGives you a reason to come see me again, cowboy.â
Logan chuckles, soft and sweet as he shakes his head bemusedly. He raises his hand, gently taking his hat from your head to drop it back on his own.
âYouâre really somethinâ else,â he mutters, brushing a strand of hair away from your face, the gesture tender in its unexpectedness.
You let out a shaky breath, heart pounding in your chest, and for a moment, everything feels raw.
Too raw. Like you're teetering on the edge of something dangerous and intoxicating, something youâre not sure youâre ready to handle.
You let your gaze drop to the floor, biting the inside of your cheek as you resist the urge to say something else, to push the moment further.
Instead, you turn, taking a slow step toward the barn doors.
Just before you reach them, you hear him again, his voice steady, but thereâs something in it that makes you pause, hands lingering on the doorframe.
"Donât be a stranger, alright?" he calls after you.
You glance over your shoulder, meeting his eyes one last time. "Wouldnât dream of it."
tags are now in the comments! if you want to get tagged for any of my works just fill out this form!
mini nat's note: lowkey want to make this a series...like this was so fun to write and i have a few more ideas...let me know chickens <3
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I need a man like thisđ«¶đ»đ«¶đ»đ«¶đ»
à©âĄËł 'baby fever' - 18+ logan x f!reader
summary: after your first baby is born, logan realises he doesn't want to stop at just one. (4.4k) tags: erm no one look at me, logan has baby fever, fluffy beginning, established relationship, breeding kink, blowjob, p in v, wet & messy, nipple play, overstimulation, creampie (lots of them oops), lots of dirty talk, clit play, missionary + doggy style, dom!logan & kind of sub!reader, crying from pleasure, rough sex, kind of body worship, for the 'home' prompt for logan promptober.
logan swears heâs dreaming, he must be. thereâs no possible way he got this lucky, right? heâs holding his own baby girl in his arms, bouncing her on his hip by the bedroom window, watching on in awe as she eagerly takes in the world around her.
the light dances in her eyes while the world passes by behind the glass, birds singing, trees swaying gently, autumn leaves twirling in their yearly gentle dance. everything is new to her, and logan canât help but be struck by such a profound love. everything feels new to him now too.
he never thought heâd have this, never thought heâd deserve it. still doesnât believe he deserves it but accepts the role with more honour than any other role heâs been bestowed before it. a father, him, logan, a father.
her eyes droop, and his smile widens more than he thought possible. he makes his way through to her room as he mumbles sweet little words of affection to her in a voice so high pitched that no one would recognise it's his.
you watch on from the bed, a warmth spreading in your chest. you could watch him like this all day. he was a natural, the paternal instinct coming so easily to him. logan had always felt this deep-seated need to protect. though he spent so many years in solitude with no path and insisted he preferred it that way, you knew differently from the moment you met him. logan was a pack animal, through and through.
his eyes land on you as he returns to the bedroom and approaches you, standing at the edge of the bed, reaching out to cup your cheek in a loving gesture. thumb tracing across your soft skin, he speaks, âyou look tired too.â
you smile, eyes closing as you lean into his touch, âmaybe a little.â
parenthood hadnât been entirely easy, but you couldnât have anyone better by your side.
logan carefully makes his way into bed beside you, pulling you against his firm chest as his hand finds your hair and begins to thread through the strands. you hear the steady beat of his heart beneath your ear, soothing you, lulling you, though he could achieve that with his presence alone.
his eyes settle on the window, head tilting to the side. you can practically hear it, the cogs turning. logan might have seemed like a steel trap to others, but he may as well be translucent to you. âwhatâs up?â you ask sleepily.
âoh,â he murmurs, he shouldnât be surprised at this point that youâre alerted by his silent mannerisms, âjust. . . thinkinâ.â
and he was, thinking about you, about the baby.
ââbout what?â you yawn.
logan pauses, â. . .would you ever want another one?â
your eyes shoot open and you lift your head to look up at him, you find his expression and realise heâs serious.
he flushes, just a little, but you notice, ânever mind.â
a small laugh of disbelief leaves you, âlogan howlett, do you have baby fever?â
he flushes deeper, what did that even mean? logan scoffs and you visibly see him retreat into that shell inside his mind.
âoh baby,â you grin, cuddling against his chest as you lean your chin against his shirt to continue gazing up at him lovingly, âyou want another baby, huh?â
groaning, he rolls his eyes, âquit it.â heâs beetroot red now, a sight he only reserves for you, though itâs not as though he can help it.
but damn, the baby was only born a few months ago - he was already thinking of your second? the thought fills you with warmth, but more prominently, need. your eyes land on his flushed face as you bite your lip, wondering if he is thinking about filling you up right this very second.
". . . what'cha thinkin' 'bout?" you ask sweetly with feigned naivety as your hand slides down his torso to find the- oh. oh. he's already hard. you know what he's thinking about.
logan groans and tilts his head back when your hand makes contact, his adams apple bobbing as he swallows thickly. "nothin'," he lies, his hand covering yours making you squeeze around his length through the material.
your breath catches in your throat, a heat rising in your chest. "is that right?" you whisper, trying to stay in control. the thought of him taking you, hard and deep, whispering filth about how he's gonna make you a momma again over and over is making it hard to resist rolling over onto your back for him.
and he can sense it, can see it in your face, the way your brows twitch as he grows harder under your touch. it's so cute, actually, how hard you try, knowing he's going to pounce any minute.
but he plays your game, he lets you remain 'in control', though you're anything but.
slowly, you sit up on his lap and begin to unbuckle his belt. time isn't exactly a luxury you can both often afford, what with a newborn baby, but you're too in the moment to care about speeding things up just yet.
his hands rest on your hips, digits digging into the skin as he practices restraint. he wants nothing more than to buck up into you, to throw you on the bed and take you. but he waits. like a good boy.
once he's freed from the constraints of his jeans and underwear, you hum softly at the sight of him, long, thick and ready. your mouth waters at the view, and his eyes widen when you begin to lower your head towards his begging, leaking tip. slowly, oh-so slowly.
logans large hand cups the back of your head, easily engulfing you in his grasp as he guides you lower until he feels it. your tongue. it teases across the tip before you're suddenly wrapping your lips around him. his eyes widen further, letting out a grunt as you take him by surprise.
"holy fuck," he huffs in a grin, "hungry for my cock, huh baby?"
you know now that your control is gone, given up happily and submissively. you know it in the grip he has on your hair, the way he's easing you up and down on his cock. and you'd give him everything if you could, the stars in the sky, the whole world if it were possible.
"that's it, get me nice and ready. . ." he mumbles, losing himself a little in the pleasure, the words dripping from his tongue like honey.
you're not sure what deal logan made with the devil to have the ability to talk as sweetly yet as filthy as he does, as well as he does, but you feel entirely grateful as his sinful words serve to dampen your underwear. you moan against his hardening cock, savouring the way every prominent vein feels against your soft tongue.
he pulls you back, looking into your lustful hazy eyes. you look so pretty like that, he thinks, lips red and swollen from sucking so well, eyes hooded and unfocused because you're thinking about how good that cock would feel stuffed deep somewhere else.
"c'mere," he coos, a hand on your hip guiding you forward to sit closer on his lap, "we need to get you nice and ready too, don't we?"
a growl rumbles from the back of his throat as his eyes travel down the path of your body, resting at the apex of your thighs. he purrs in delight when he notices you're already soaked through to your shorts. "wow, that worked up just from suckin' my cock, baby? you really do want me. . ."
you're bright red, shifting needily on his lap. it's always like this, he drives you to the brink of insanity with need before he's even started. you crave him, crave that thick length filling you so perfectly like it always does, and fuck, you'd give him a baby, you'd give him a hundred babies if it meant you get to experience this over and over again.
"shh," he whispers, his thumb snaking down to tease you through your shorts, applying just enough pressure to have you panting, "there we go, gettin' you nice and ready for my cock, my pretty girl. . ." his eyes flit to yours before returning his gaze to the soaked fabric.
"i am ready," you whine through a choked moan. you're literally dripping.
logan shakes his head, tutting, "tsk, tsk. . . need you extra ready for what i'm gonna do to you, you think i'm just gonna cum in you once?"
holy fuck. your head spins, reeling at his words as you feel your pussy clench around nothing. the ache between your legs grows, almost unbearable, pleading to be filled, used. his name leaves your lips in what can only be described as a needy mewl.
"no," he continues, grabbing your chin and pulling you closer, "see baby, i'm gonna cum in you, over and over. 'till you're nice and full, it's all i've been thinkin' about." his breath ghosts against your lips, "and you're gonna take it like a good girl, aren't you? gonna give me another baby?"
you moan breathlessly, how can you even respond to that? instead you nod quickly, swallowing hard as you try in a futile effort to stop your head from spinning.
but he loves you like this, needy, panting, desperate for his cock. sure, he might have been the one blushing earlier, but you're certainly a pretty shade of red now.
"use your words," he whispers against your lips, teasing you with the promise of a kiss, and a whole lot more.
you feel yourself clench again, his thumb still rubbing soft circles against your clit through your shorts, "please."
"please what?" logan grins, loving how your face twists in frustration.
a whine, "please fill me up, want to give you another baby, please? please, fuck, just fuck me."
he can't help but laugh softly at the needy words spilling from your lips in a desperate attempt to coax him inside. and it's working. his body thrums with pleasure as he remembers how good you feel, how he fits inside you like you were made for him, how good you take it when he gets a little rough.
"that's a good girl. . ." he hums, gripping your hips and flipping you over onto your back. his towering muscled form looms over you, your body opening up automatically, legs spreading and hands by your head. you want him to take you, take all of you. now.
"love this body, was made for me y'know. . ." logan mumbles lovingly as he kisses his way down the column of your throat, hands rubbing at your hips before they begin to inch up your shirt. it rises until it covers your face, and he keeps it there as he nips at your chest. "hm, no bra?" you feel his devious smirk against your skin, tongue beginning to flick teasingly at a nipple.
your back arches, the sensations amplified by the loss of sight. fuck, he loves to watch you squirm like this, and those noises you make. . .
he gives equal attention to both nipples, licking and sucking and kissing your breasts with increasing intensity, smirking all the while. finally, he pulls the shirt from your head, your breath catches in your throat as you look down at him and meet his hungry gaze.
logan begins kissing along your tummy, nuzzling against your soft skin, so close to where you want him yet so far. you want to beg, but you don't get the chance, because soon he's pulling down your shorts along with your underwear. he's greedy too.
kissing the skin that's exposed to him, his kisses trail down your mound, ending at the top of your glistening slit. "ah," he grins, eyes glowing like a man of great discovery, "there she is, she's missed me huh?"
all breath escapes your lungs as he licks a stripe along your pussy, groaning at the taste as he does so. he buries his face in you, licking and nudging your clit with his tongue as he devours you. logan swears it feels better for him than for you, could eat you out all day, but that's not what he's here for this time.
"you're so wet, holy fuck," he swallows, panting softly against your skin, "so good for me, so good, just-" giving a few quick kisses to your pussy, he pulls back and removes his shirt, "don't move."
you almost laugh, why would you want to go anywhere? with a man like logan who worships the ground you walk on, kisses you like it's the first time every time and fucks you within an inch of your life every time - you'd be crazy to want to be anywhere else but here, beneath him, where you belong.
he's worked himself out of his jeans and boxers too, admiring the view beneath him as he takes his cock in his hand, slapping it against your slit. with each squeak that escapes you, his smirk grows wider, "love those noises you make, just for me."
you gasp and arch your back as he begins to rub his tip against your wet folds. you're not sure who he's teasing more, himself or you. a moan slips from your lips each time his cock glides up against your clit, sending sparks to your core.
"that's it, feel how hard i am?" he whispers, "yeah, gonna cum so hard in that pretty little pussy, baby, is that what you want?"
you can hardly take it anymore, "god, yes."
he grins, positioning himself as he hooks your knees on top of his arms as he presses down, almost folding you in half. you gasp and grip the sheets at this new position, and gasp even louder as he quickly and easily slips inside of you. "fucking hell," logan huffs, "i hardly even had to move, you want it so fuckin' bad don't you? feel how deep i can get like this?"
and god, you can. you're not sure you've ever felt him this deep. all you know is how good it feels, his cock straining against your tight velvet walls, finally filling you.
when he begins to move, it's like nothing else. he starts at a slower pace, slow deep strokes as his hips meet yours, driving his cock even deeper as you open up to him. his eyes flutter shut and you admire him above you, knowing you're making him feel as good as he's making you feel.
you find your voice again, and speak up, "your cock feels so good baby, don't stop. . ." you get what you secretly wanted, a moan sneaks from his lips. it's soft, wanting, mirroring the need in your own voice. "fuck, love it when you moan for me. . ."
his eyes snap open, a flash of vulnerability and then his lips are crashing against yours. he kisses you with a deep passion as he moves inside you. logan loves the man he becomes when he fucks you, loves that he can let go, be soft, be rough, be whatever he feels. you'll accept him either way, because you're always a spent mess in the end. all for him.
"takin' my cock so well, always do," he huffs against your lips, driving himself a little deeper, wet sounds filling the air as he slips in and out, "gonna feel even better when i make you cum a few times, when you're so sensitive, taking every last drop i give ya."
you moan and pant, nodding, wordlessly begging him to continue.
"and you'll take it, huh, baby? take it cus you wanna make me a daddy again?" he growls, pace increasing as he fucks you harder, primal instinct taking over, "wanna make me proud and let me fill you as many times as i can? many times as i want?"
holy fuck, you can hardly think straight. in fact, you can hardly think at all. there's one thing, one thought swirling around the base of your skull, you don't want him to ever stop.
you clench around his thick cock and his brows lower, pressing his forehead against yours as he pounds you into the mattress. the bed is squeaking, begging for mercy as he continues, but you feel too good for him to hold back anymore. "baby please-"
"baby please what?" he snaps back, panting as he leans further into you, pushing your legs back until they're almost at your ears. you'd be shocked at your own flexibility if you could think at all. "please fill you up? please make you a mommy again? please what, huh? speak, baby, i can't hear you."
gasping at his tone, you feel your pussy flutter around him. he's gonna make you cum, fuck, you're gonna cum so hard. "i- baby i'm-"
but he doesn't let you finish your sentence, not that you'd make much sense at this point anyway. his cock twitches inside you, almost begging to be milked, begging to fill you until you can't take any more. "gonna cum?" logan whispers, already knowing the answer.
and you can't answer, because you're a mess, gasping and moaning and writhing as his cock makes light work of your wet pussy. his thick length glides in, and out, driving deep to meet your cervix with every thrust.
"cum on this cock," a firm command punctuated with a deep thrust that knocks the air from your lungs, "c'mon, make me cum, you wanted it, didn't you? want me to knock you up nice and good."
your orgasm approaches, a warmth spreading through your lower stomach, rising and rising each time his hips meet yours in his relentless pace. you want to tell him that it feels so good, but your words get caught in your throat. and all at once, your climax rips through you.
it comes in waves, building until your walls are spasming around him and he's cumming too, hot white ropes of cum pushed deeper and deeper as his pace quickens. you're both cursing, panting as his cock pushes it deeper and deeper as your pussy flutters and gushes.
even as the climax fades, he doesn't falter. "told you," logan growls, leaning up to grip your thighs, lifting your lower half to the perfect angle as he keeps it suspended in the air in his tight grip, "gonna cum in that pretty little pussy as many times as i can, 'till i know you're carrying my baby."
it's so overwhelming, in the best kind of way. you wriggle as he begins fucking you again, the new angle causing your eyes to roll back as he hits a certain spot that has you sobbing. it feels so fucking good, both his words and his actions causing you to throb.
"that's it, i know you can take it," he soothes you, "that's my girl, c'mon. . ."
tears prick at your eyes, the pleasure once again building to a crescendo. you don't want him to stop, don't want him to ever stop. though you're so very sensitive, and so very tired, you don't fucking care, all that matters right now is him and the messy love you're making.
he feels a tightening in his gut, his mind spiralling, obsessed with the idea of having another child with you. "you like it when i breed you?" he whispers suddenly, testing the waters.
fuck, that word. did he just say he was. . . breeding you?
logan feels the way you clench around him at the mention of the word and he grins, "yeah, you like that don't you? take that fucking cock like a good girl, let me breed you."
"please-" you beg, feeling his cock twitch inside of you. he's really into this, and so are you, unlocking a whole new side to one another as he fucks you fervently.
how can he resist when you beg so sweetly? he's so sensitive, but his need for release chases him, overwhelming him with how intense his second orgasm is. he spills into you, gasping and grunting as his grip on your thighs tightens. "oooooh f-fuck," logan groans, "feel that? feel me fucking my cum even deeper?"
you're both lost in pleasure now, and with his stamina you know he's not done yet. he grips your hips, flipping you onto your tummy as he grabs your ass, pulling it up for him. keeping his cock nice and warm inside you, he pauses for a few moments.
"can you take another one?" he asks, panting. he'd never push you past your limits, leaning down against your back to give you a gentle kiss on your neck.
your second release is coming, and though you're exhausted, you need more. "yes," you reply, gripping the pillow as he immediately begins to move.
his head tilts back, his palm sliding down your spine, feeling your soft skin beneath his calloused hand and the sensation of your body bouncing back against him. one hand grips your hip as he begins his movements, slowly fucking you, taking his time.
he knows you're close, and he knows your second release will have him cumming a third time, so he focuses on your pleasure. "that's it baby, taking it so well. . ."
you groan into the pillow beneath you, muffled by the fabric. it all sounds so wet, both your release and his dripping from your aching cunt. you know you'll be sore tomorrow, but who the fuck cares? he's fucking you so good you're not sure you'll ever be able to think clearly again.
he's reduced you to a puddle, wet and begging for more.
"such a good girl for me, lettin' me breed you. . ." his hand trails around your front, tickling down along your tummy until he finds your clit. it's swollen, sensitive, and as soon as he begins to play with you, you're a squealing mess.
he grins against your ear, groaning roughly, "you can take it, know you can, make me cum one more time."
you bounce back against him, feverishly chasing each movement, each time he pounds you sending you spiralling further and further into pleasure.
"gonna fuck a baby into you," he kisses behind your ear, "feel all that cum?"
a whine is all you can manage, sweat causing your hair to cling to your forehead, whole body hot and desperate. all for him, always for him.
"yeah you do, take it," he snarls, huffing as he feels his own release build once more. oh god, this one might destroy him. you feel too good wrapped around him like that, the way your wet pussy takes him in so gladly, cause it's his. you're his.
"'m gonna cum-" you cry, sobbing into the pillow as your thighs shake till you can't take it anymore. you're flat against the bed now, his body behind you, taking, pounding against you relentlessly like a man deprived.
but he can't speak, can only communicate in growls and gasps as he explodes inside you, sending you propelling towards your orgasm. it hits you like a bullet, deep, hard, teetering on painful but quickly replaced with so much satisfaction that your screams sound like howls.
he continues working your clit beneath you, slowing his pace until you're both a sweating, panting mess of limbs.
it takes him a while before he can find words, bringing a hand to your face, tucking your hair behind your ear so he can see those features of yours he loves so much. "you alright?" logan asks with that rare soft voice he adopts when he's caring for you. his warm baritones make everything better, voice alone better than any sex.
"mh," you nod, world slowly returning to you in bits and pieces. he pulls out of you, taking a second to admire how very full of him you actually are. he can't help but bite his lip at the sight, watching as his cum leaks from your tight hole, fluttering from the loss of contact.
"didn't go too hard?" he asks, carefully and tenderly turning you onto your front as he grabs some spare pillows.
you shake your head, a smile curling on your lips as you bask in the afterglow, loving how sweetly he takes care of you. he lifts your hips with ease, placing some pillows below.
your eyes lock on one another and he grins, "what?" he asks, "said i was gonna get you pregnant, didn't i? gotta keep your hips elevated, keep me inside."
a flush falls upon your cheeks and you laugh breathlessly as he relaxes into the bed beside you, nuzzling into your neck. he fits against you so perfectly, arm wrapping around your waist while he presses gentle kisses to your skin.
but you feel a mischevious smirk tug on his lips against you, "what is it, logan," you ask in a drawl, grin taking over your features.
"well, was just thinkin'-"
"never a good idea, you, thinking. just leads to trouble," you tease.
he scoffs, "shut up," before continuing, "what're we gonna name out third baby?"
your eyes widen, "third?" he must have made a mistake, maybe he's too fucked out to think straight. you know you are.
"yeah," he grins, his hand snaking from your waist to rest on your tummy, giving it a gentle pat, "after this one."
"more?!" you gasp, slapping his hand with a giggle. "logan howlett." ugh, he's the worst.
he loves that reaction from you, he thinks it's cute you assume he's joking.
except, he isn't joking.
"yeah, c'mon, you think i'm gonna be able to stop at just two?"
you flush deeper, feeling his warm palm splay across your stomach as you tilt your chin down to look into his eyes.
"need names. lots of 'em." logan's eyes sparkle, he's trouble, always has been, and you love it. but you start to wonder if you should have bought a bigger house.
"start makin' a list. now."
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