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cas: i’m in love with dean

sam: i’m sorry?

cas: i said i’m in love with—

sam: no, i heard you the first time. i’m just sorry

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And like I need everyone to rewatch s1-2 with the mindset that Dean’s never had a hunting partner before. “I was working my own gig in new orleans” and “dad used to send me away” and “the story became the story” and like, yes, Dean and John did hunt together, as evidenced in 1x04, but they weren’t hunting partners, as evidenced in 1x20 by how John treats him.

The majority of hunts Dean went on were alone. He did the witness questioning, the research, the puzzle solving, the cemetery digs, the monster hunts alone.

Which puts two things into perspective. The first is that Dean is very very good at outsourcing. One scene that comes to mind is in 1x16 where Sam teases Dean for calling another hunter to uncover some lore. He didn’t have a partner ever to help pick up the slack when shit hit the ceiling (on hunts with John, Dean is playing support in every avenue) until Sam started hunting full time and was able to help provide support via their mutual partnership.

The second is that Dean is putting in a performance specifically for Sam for two entire seasons straight. The long winded sighs, the digs at Sam being a “college boy nerd,” pretending to hate reading, downplaying his interpersonal skills and empathy towards civilians.

It’s a facade. One entirely catered towards Sam to make him feel more comfortable, and like Dean needs him there. He spends most of 1x11 lamenting that Sam isn’t there, to Sam but also in general because he misses Sam.

And like, there isn’t even really a point I’m trying to make here. It’s just that s1-2 Dean (first season in particular) is written so insanely well. Especially in retrospect of later seasons. The first time we see Dean let his game face drop is so telling of the character we get for 15 more seasons.

“I don’t want to,” happening in 1x01 is insane. From his first appearance on screen we learn exactly who he is: a big fake who’s desperately lonely.

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Can you imagine, Lucifer is pretending to be Cas and he's having a moment with Dean and he's trying to play Cas based on memory but every single word or action he takes he has Cas yapping in his ear like "I wouldn't do that, Dean knows I wouldn't do that" "no don't laugh I don't understand that reference" "you haven't even looked into his eyes with soul aching tenderness, he's going to figure it out" "stand closer I would stand closer... No more, you need to be close enough to feel his warmth" "wrong shoulder, I repeat, WRONG SHOULDER" "let me take control for just a second you're a terrible liar" "Dean Dean Dean Dean Dean Dean Dean Dean"

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my writer brain: nuh uh i'm not changing that it's my style. i write like that because it's my style. i have a style. it sounds like that because it's my style. my style. my style. you don't like it? well it's my style.

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This pose was a prompt on the @spnspeeddatingbang discord server, I of course had to make it Destiel. You can see the reference image behind the cut

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a ‘quick’ doodle… cas is a biter

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The prompt on the @spnspeeddatingbang discord this week was a photo of hands. I did of course need to Destiel-ify it 💙💚

Reference photo behind the cut

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Bloody dean kissing Cas leaking out grace save me, save me bloody dean kissing Cas leaking out grace

(Timelapse under the cut)

Evenfall by @macy2me

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Eddie G | Blonde

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🦋🖕

@faerise-fae boooooo I don’t wanna but here 😹

tag game!

Your last emojis are your gender

🇺🇲👍

Uh

@erikaskblog @fymo-blogs

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always torn between "this is fanfiction, it doesn't need to be 100% realistic" and "if i get even a single fact about this obscure thing wrong, i am going to be violently killed with hammers"

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I need actual touch starved Dean Winchester who kind of freezes up whenever Castiel touches him, and Cas thinks it's because Dean is mad at him but quickly figures out the truth and helps him through it not in a sexy way but in a "i'm gonna hold you now" kind of way and just makes him feel safe. Dean is totally embarrassed about the whole thing but deep down really really loves it and doesn't know how to ask for it again, but totally DOES NOT because he doesn't deserve it. Of course he doesn't it. He is a monster. He has done horrible horrible things and needs to stay the way he is.

Castiel then TRICKS him into doing it again and again until Dean starts to get really irritated at him for it because again, he doesn't DESERVE it but Cas' "Good things do happen" speech comes around again but Cas respectfully backs off until Dean very quietly and shyly and maybe with a stutter asks if Cas would do something with him that would require them to be close again.

(also somewhere a convo where dean doesn't know how to ask to be held or touched without it involving sex and that is the only time he ever GOT to be held or touched positively and Cas kinda shows him one way while then Dean shows him the other way and everyone is in love and happy and bye i'm gonna stop talking)

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actually dean coming back from hell a demon would have been so funny bc he'd be like HEHE MORALS WHERE! sam waht are you doing :/

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when the locket feels cold around Hermione and Ron’s necks but warm around Harry’s