lordofthebotch - Tumblr blog

[lordofthebotch]

You can only reblog this today or until the next Monday, June 19th, 2034.

[lordofthebotch]

🌳🌲🌳🌳🌲🌳🌳🌳🌲

Tiny forest for your dash

[lordofthebotch]

omg if baby oil dissolves condoms what the fuck does it do to babies???

This may be shocking, but babies and condoms are made of different material

[lordofthebotch]

Thinking about how my mom tried to “seduce” my dad when they were in college together by sneaking oranges into his backpack, because she grew up food insecure and feeding someone/sharing food was a big deal with her upbringing with a lot of emotional meaning–

and meanwhile my poor dad is just convinced that he’s been haunted by some citrus poltergeist because why the fuck are there always oranges in his bag he swears he did not put there???

[lordofthebotch]

Bruce Wayne, trying to go over the case of a murder victim but very confused: Tim, why are you wearing sunglasses in the Cave?

Tim Drake, wearing sunglasses to cover up his black eye that he got last night because there was no patrol but he and his siblings went for a joyride in the Batmobile and events led to his head slamming into the steering wheel: uhhhh

Dick Grayson, very desperately trying to hide this fact from Bruce because he's supposed to be the responsible elder sibling: B, if I may. Tim spoke to us all about a week ago about wearing sunglasses to all murder briefings moving forward to show respect for the dead. I simply forgot. And Jason refused because he has no value for human life.

Jason Todd, very much enjoying watching his brothers squirm but playing along because it's definitely his fault Tim's head slammed into the steering wheel: It's true, I don't.

[lordofthebotch]

👀👀👀

[lordofthebotch]

Let gay/bi men and bi women talk about their attraction to men in LGBT spaces without people saying that men are awful and it sucks to be attracted to them. Let bi men talk about their attraction to women in LGBT spaces without people saying that men’s attraction to women is disgusting. Let men and people who like men exist in LGBT spaces without being attacked by sexist assholes.

[lordofthebotch]

fucked up that i can’t listen to a podcast, listen to an album, study, draw, read a book, watch a tv show, watch a movie, journal, facetime a friend, go on a hike, go on a run, and bake all at the same time 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 guess the only option is to do nothing

[lordofthebotch]

Stupid is timeless.

[lordofthebotch]

I still can’t believe that in the last 10 years Superman, Green Arrow, Flash and Supergirl all had live-action shows about them with 100-200 episodes, meanwhile Batman literally didn’t have his own show since the 60′s??

Like yeah he’s definitely overexposed on the big screen, but the fact fact that he (nor any of the Batkids) never had their own TV show is crazy to me.

[lordofthebotch]

for the first like 14 years of my life i thought that the story of saint valentine and valentines day were a celebration of a massive gay polyamorous marriage and let me tell you, i was sorely disappointed when i learned i had massively misunderstood that story

[lordofthebotch]

stuff that's big

the universe planets the naruto fandom unfortunately the gaping void in my life texas the purple man from kuroko no basket

[lordofthebotch]

[lordofthebotch]

[lordofthebotch]

out of curiosity i searched for the very first of the 400k+ naruto fics on ff.net and…… im overwhelmed fam. it’s sasunaru from 2001. before the anime even started. before the manga was even officially translated. what a cultural landmark. this is like witnessing the birth of history itself honestly

[lordofthebotch]

I’m so much more productive after the sun goes down. While the sun is up I feel the weight of having to do things and it just overwhelms me.

But when the sun has gone to bed suddenly my time is my own. I can do with it what I will and oftentimes that means the cleaning I’ve been meaning to do, the projects I’ve been putting off. They suddenly don’t seem overwhelming to me.

I like it when the sun goes down.