lorene707

[lorene707]

FUCK MY HEART

Being in a situationship with Geum Seong-je hcs:

• You don’t remember how it started. Not really. You just remember the tension. That weird, low-level electricity that followed you whenever Seong-je was around. He never flirted. Never smiled at you. Barely even talked. But there was always this feeling — like he was waiting for something. Like he was watching.

• The first time it happened, it wasn’t romantic. It wasn’t even planned. It was after a party. You were pissed, he was pissed, you said something sharp and stupid and he grabbed you by the wrist and shoved you against the wall. And you didn’t tell him to stop. Not when his mouth was on yours. Not when his hand was between your legs. Not even when he said, “You better not make this a thing.”

• And it didn’t become a thing. Not officially. You didn’t talk about it. You didn’t ask him where he went when he disappeared. He didn’t ask you who you were texting. But somehow, it kept happening. Every time you said it was the last time, it wasn’t.

• He doesn’t touch you in public. Doesn’t text you goodnight. Doesn’t post. Doesn’t call. But he shows up. Always. Always at the worst times — late nights, after arguments, when you’re pissed at the world and don’t want to see anyone.

He never asks if he can come in. Just leans against your doorframe and waits. You always let him in.

• You’ve never heard him say “I like you.” But you’ve heard,

“Don’t wear that out again.”

“Why were you sitting next to him?”

“Next time you ignore me, I won’t be so nice.”

That’s what passes for affection with Seong-je.

• He talks to you like you’re just a convenience. Acts like you’re the one who keeps crawling back to him. But he’s the one who remembers what food you like, who pulls you onto his lap when you’re angry, who won’t let you leave when you’re crying even though he’s garbage at comfort.

“I’m not gonna say some soft shit,” he mutters, brushing your hair off your face.

“Didn’t ask you to,” you bite back. But you lean into his chest anyway.

• You don’t call it jealousy. But the second you so much as laugh too hard at another guy’s joke, he shuts down. Goes silent. Gets mean. One time you were drunk at a gathering and sat in someone else’s lap and Seong-je didn’t say anything until the night was over — then dragged you into a side hallway, slammed you against the wall and kissed you so hard your lip split.

“Don’t make me look stupid again.”

You should’ve been mad. But you kissed him back harder.

• The sex is intense. Desperate. Quiet, sometimes — like if anyone heard it, it’d make it real. He doesn’t make love. He fucks. Fast, rough, with teeth on your neck and his fingers gripping your hips so hard they bruise. But sometimes, right at the end, he softens. Presses his forehead to yours. Keeps his hand on your thigh. Stays inside you a little longer.

That’s the part that really fucks with your head.

• Afterward, he doesn’t cuddle. Doesn’t say sweet things. Half the time he lights a cigarette and stares out the window. But he never leaves right away either. He always lingers. Picks up your clothes. Brushes his fingers against your back like he didn’t mean to.

It’s not affection. But it’s something.

• You tell yourself you’re not attached. You tell your friends it’s nothing serious.

“It’s just sex,” you lie.

But it’s not. Because it makes your chest ache when he leaves. Because you dream about him. Because you miss him even when you hate him.

• He pretends he doesn’t care. But he knows things. You were sick once and didn’t tell anyone. He showed up with soup and medicine and didn’t say a word about how he found out. Just pushed the bag into your hands and muttered, “Don’t be dumb next time.”

• Sometimes he gets violent. Not with you — but around you. He holds it in, but you can see it simmering. He clenches his fists when people look at you too long. You’ve seen him pull someone aside and say something low enough you couldn’t hear. The guy didn’t speak to you again after that.

• You try not to cry in front of him. He doesn’t know what to do with it. He shuts down — stiffens, goes cold. But once, when you broke down in his apartment, he didn’t leave. Just sat beside you, awkward, quiet, and rubbed your back. Later, when you were asleep, you felt him pull the blanket over you and press a hand against your spine like he was checking to see if you were still breathing.

• You’ve stopped trying to define it. He won’t. He acts like the whole thing is your idea. Like you’re the one who made it messy. But he’s the one who shows up every time. The one who gets jealous. The one who pulled you into his lap last week and whispered, “No one touches you. Ever.”

• You don’t date anyone else. Not because you’re exclusive — but because it wouldn’t feel right. He’d find out. And it wouldn’t be worth the fallout. You saw what he did to that guy last semester.

“I’m not your boyfriend,” he told you after.

“Then why do you act like it?”

He didn’t answer.

• Sometimes, when you’re asleep beside him, you think about how it could be different. How if he’d just admit it — just say he wanted you — it might be okay. You might be okay.

But then you wake up, and he’s already getting dressed, already halfway out the door.

“Lock it behind me,” is all he says.

• You know this can’t go on forever. But you also know — if he ever asked you to stay, you would.

And if he ever told you to stop seeing anyone else? You’d listen.

Even if it hurt.

Especially if it hurt.

[lorene707]

need him in my life tbh (and a lobotomy)

[lorene707]

Reblog if you’re bored and you want anons.

[lorene707]

LIERALLY WHY IS HE SO UNDERRRATEDDD

SEOPASS DROP A MYLES JOO SIDE STORY AND MY LIFE IS YOURS 😭😭😭

[lorene707]

NO LITERALLY?? like I get why donald had to die but fuck, ben's been shown to lose control during fights at times and it would have been a lot more compelling imo for ben to lose his shit and actually break through that difference in skill but at the cost of donald's life

Opinion: Ben shouldve won against Donald tbh

[lorene707]

i crosspost to the kdrama to piss people off

Me when I heard all of the changes made in the Weak Hero Kdrama:

[lorene707]

[lorene707]

CH.6: OSSUARY

(cutesy little preview from when the blood settles :D)

In this lifetime, he—Wolf Keum—is caged.

Behind glass, behind bars, awaiting execution. He sprawls in the visitor's chair, skin chafing red where the cuffs bite silver. Orange jumpsuit. Number 508, already peeling. The officers slam him against the table hard enough to crack his glasses, their knuckles twisted in his hair, spittle flying from their mouths before they can even form the questions. 

Why? 

They demand. 

Why that girl? 

And Wolf just laughs, head cocking further, eyes bright and empty as silver medallions.

"Had to, y'know?"

Snorts. Pinches his nose, licks the mucus off his thumb with a jerk of the chin. 

"Cute bitch. Stupid, too." His tongue traces the gaps of his teeth like he's savoring the memory, like he's scouring the enamel of a particularly juicy steak. "Fucking asked for it."

They don't question him again.

Want the carnage before the end? Fic here (next two chapters dropping on 6/18!!): https://archiveofourown.org/works/62840767

[lorene707]

why is this so fucking real (I'm chopped)

me as a writer

[lorene707]

bitch can write dissertations on her own fics but can't write the new chapter SMH my head

Yes I re-read my own fics because I wrote them for ME

[lorene707]

[lorene707]

23.02.24 - 07.04.24 - 16.07.24

[lorene707]

[lorene707]

✦ WELCOME TO THE CARNAGE ✦

(aka: hi, I write things that make people feel sparky and maybe a little sleepless. oops.)

🕯️ call me lorene | 🜁 chaotic neutral | 🜃 ENTP (unfortunately) 🝮 longtime Weak Hero enjoyer (since 2018) 🜲 known to consume rot with a side of waffles & spit it back up as unhinged prose

currently writing silly little fanfics on AO3: 🔗 you devour like smoked bovine hide (4/30k words published | wolf keum x reader | crime, pathology, the usual cocktail) 🔗 DEVILISH (Weak Hero longfic in progress — all you need to know is that it will hurt)

📚 reading: Your Throne, Pyramid Game, Forest of Humans, Tales of the Unusual, Hero Killer, Dreaming Freedom, Stealing Her Place, My Deepest Secret, Omniscient Reader (yes I collect psychological horror webtoons like infinity stones. what about it.)

🎧 soundtracked by: Ethel Cain bleeding into CHASE ATLANTIC | a girl’s gotta dissociate aesthetically

Expect: — drabble, fic teasers, aesthetic drivel, analytical gore — rants. so many rants. — an actual personality if you stick around long enough

reblog if you’re into ✦ psycho girls ✦ blood-stained boys ✦ literary delusions (nabokov, is that you??) ✦

[lorene707]

Ref Recs for Whump Writers

Violence: A Writer’s Guide:  This is not about writing technique. It is an introduction to the world of violence. To the parts that people don’t understand. The parts that books and movies get wrong. Not just the mechanics, but how people who live in a violent world think and feel about what they do and what they see done.

Hurting Your Characters: HURTING YOUR CHARACTERS discusses the immediate effect of trauma on the body, its physiologic response, including the types of nerve fibers and the sensations they convey, and how injuries feel to the character. This book also presents a simplified overview of the expected recovery times for the injuries discussed in young, otherwise healthy individuals.

Body Trauma: A writer’s guide to wounds and injuries. Body Trauma explains what happens to body organs and bones maimed by accident or intent and the small window of opportunity for emergency treatment. Research what happens in a hospital operating room and the personnel who initiate treatment. Use these facts to bring added realism to your stories and novels.

10 B.S. Medical Tropes that Need to Die TODAY…and What to Do Instead: Written by a paramedic and writer with a decade of experience, 10 BS Medical Tropes covers exactly that: clichéd and inaccurate tropes that not only ruin books, they have the potential to hurt real people in the real world. 

Maim Your Characters: How Injuries Work in Fiction: Increase Realism. Raise the Stakes. Tell Better Stories. Maim Your Characters is the definitive guide to using wounds and injuries to their greatest effect in your story. Learn not only the six critical parts of an injury plot, but more importantly, how to make sure that the injury you’re inflicting matters. 

Blood on the Page: This handy resource is a must-have guide for writers whose characters live on the edge of danger. If you like easy-to-follow tools, expert opinions from someone with firsthand knowledge, and you don’t mind a bit of fictional bodily harm, then you’ll love Samantha Keel’s invaluable handbook