luna-faye-blog - Tumblr blog

[luna-faye-blog]

Everyone battles their own inner demons, and as much as I want them to be happy, the battle is theirs to conquer. Any moment I can manage to get a genuine smile or laugh out of them, you bet I will indulge in that moment 😈

[luna-faye-blog]

90s Nostalgia Stickers made by Aly Jones

[luna-faye-blog]

[luna-faye-blog]

✨   Follow @psych2go for more! ✨

✧ Check out our website here ✧

[luna-faye-blog]

Donald Trump gets attacked by an eagle.

This eagle truly represents America. What a majestic symbol.

[luna-faye-blog]

Hello there.  My website – My Instagram (NEW!) – See me on LINE Webtoon!

[luna-faye-blog]

We have had a great month and here is our top 5 posts of January!

[luna-faye-blog]

Depression

[luna-faye-blog]

Self Portrait

[luna-faye-blog]

Future

[luna-faye-blog]

Lyrics

What am I gonna do? What am I gonna say?        Everything is falling into pieces. It’ll never be the same.

     What am I gonna do? Why do I feel this way?          Everything is so messed up. Will this never go away?

[luna-faye-blog]

New You

A sit and look ahead. A beautiful face stares back at me. I think for a second about where I am, As I do I turn my head slightly. Keeping her in my sight, she moves too. The same way at the same pace… She does look familiar… the pale skin, the curly auburn hair, the blue eyes. That was me… How? Why? I must be dreaming... I hope not. I take in my surroundings. This is a really nice bed room. I mean, a thin young female version of myself, in a nice house… I couldn’t ask for more… nothing else. I smiled, and the all too familiar woman in the mirror smiled back at me. I hear a handsome young voice yell from a far off place “Amber! Are you ready yet? They hate it when we’re late.” Alert, I turn to the door eyes wide in confusion. Is that me? I mean I know the name… It is one I am connected to…Though I could sit here and gaze into the mirror for hours, I wonder how well this new body works. I stand slowly, carefully. My slender arm bracing myself on the vanity in front of me. I’m wobbly at first I notice that I have on a pair of high heel suede boots on, there’s the reason I was having difficulties. I Readjust my standing position and put my weight on the balls of my feet. Hmm, my body must be used to this. I expected more discomfort. I have few problems after that. I feel better than I have most of my life. Strangely stronger too, I mean It’s no effort to lift myself at all, I feel light as if I could float across the ground to any destination of my choosing. This room. It’s huge. The ceiling is at least four feet away. And it’s a pretty decent sized room as well. I turn my eyes to the bed behind where I was just sitting. I’ve never seen a bed that large. I wonder how soft it is…  It’s royal looking. Carved frame, elegant red covers, frilled heavy white throw draped across the bottom. Cute, elegant, comfy. Perfect, just my taste. In fact everything in here is decorated to my liking… I must have arranged everything myself. I mean there are some things that seem off about it. If it is just my room as I am now anyway… I feel a chill. It looks like the window’s broken. And winter air is chilling me to the bone. It’s colder than anything I’ve ever felt before. I close the heavy drapes over the window. They darken the room and sway slightly with every gust of frigged air let into the room. I decide that now is a perfect time to try out that big soft bed. I pull the covers back revealing the exquisite clean white sheets. So soft. I slide under the heavy blankets and pull them up around my neck the pillow is like a cloud, slightly cool at first but warming up very quickly. I’m so drowsy I could sleep for ages. My eyes start to close. I hear the door knob turning and start to sit up. I hear the voice from before start to speak as the door is opened from the other side and I stand to face my intruder “Hey, babe, you didn’t answer. Are you okay?” the door fully opened I see looming before me a very fit reasonably handsome man who must be at least seven and a half feet tall! The top of my head barely comes to his neck. I’m not used to looking up at anyone, even to look straight at someone is not all that common… this made me think, maybe… This room, this man… they aren’t huge, I’m just small. Ha! I’ve always wanted to be small. Being big is such a burden sometimes, this however was somewhat frightening… He looked strong, I don’t know if I could fight him if I had to… No I wouldn’t stand a chance. It’d be an instant victory for him. I mean, I probably wouldn’t have to, but, pop quiz! Is the correct answer: a. I don’t know where I am, b. I could be an intruder here, c. I don’t know him, d. He’s scary. If you guessed e. all of the above, *Bing-bong* you got a, thanks for playing. My inner monolog is so weird sometimes… As I finish my thought I see his eyes widen in Shock “What happened to the window?!” His eyes shifted to the bed Oh my god, the bed! Is that… blood?!” he said as he started towards it. What? Blood! I feel something wet and cold pressing against my back… I reach to feel what it is… He, now to my side looks over with my new movement. His face goes pale “Amber! What happened?! There’s blood everywhere! Are you okay--- come with me, come on!” he stutters panicked as he grabs my arm by the bicep with his huge hands and gently pulls me towards him as he closes the distance between us. My shy mode is full force and has been this whole time. The heels of my boots give way and cause me to fall, though it isn’t so far as he stands there to catch me in his chest. My hands reach out slightly to catch myself instinctively and land on his chest. He reaches down as I stand there pressed against him, bewildered. My legs are pulled out from under me and I find myself in his arms, unable to speak, face flushed red with embarrassment, being rushed out the door down the hallway and towards a set of stairs. I come too slightly. What is he doing! You don’t go around picking… girls… up randomly. I struggle a little. This just makes him hold on tighter. “Amber stop struggling! What are you doing?!” I feel his voice vibrate.  I grunt weakly as I push against him and wiggle furiously trying to free myself. He slows to a near stop as he tries desperately to hold on “Gah! Why?!” Mistake? He tries his best to hold on, but “Successful” I fall to the ground and hit hard on my rear end. In a panic now, I crawl as best I can towards the stairs. A large hand grabs my ankle and starts to pull me back slightly. “Amber, please!” I roll over onto my back holding onto the white painted railing of the second floor balcony summon a good measure of strength and give him my best kick to the side. “Ah!” he exclaims. It weakens his grasp for a moment, and madly I scoot backwards. As I start to turn to get up and run I find myself tumbling down the staircase. “Babe!” fortunately I roll as safely as you can when you go down a set of stairs any way but upright. I land hard at the bottom. I got the wind knocked out of me, and I put all my effort into putting it back in for a few moments. He runs down the stairs after me. He rushes to my side placing his hand on my side “Babe! Babe! Can you hear me?!” he pulls my limp body to my feet and throws my arm over his shoulder. He starts walking me to the door… again… yes I struggle with him. I’m not in my right mind, I can’t be. I’m still scared. My fight or flight is going crazy! I don’t know where he’s going to take me. I don’t know who he is… though I now have my suspicions.  He puts me up against the wall. I try pushing him away. He grabs my wrists and pins me. I kick randomly with both legs, and bite at him, struggling to get free futilely. Sometimes when I kick both legs come off the ground and I am suspended in the air by my arms. He presses his body against mine to pin me better, so I can’t fight. I can feel every part of him. We’re close. Too close. All I can do whine in frustration as I look away from him in embarrassment “Amber. Look at me. Listen.” I ignore him. I can’t look at him… not like this. Totally defeated. I stood more of a chance than I thought I would… Though I probably did get extremely lucky. And I don’t think he wanted to hurt me… I feel he knows my resignation… and my lasting rebellion. He repositions my hands, sliding them together over my head so he can free one of his. He uses his free hand to grab my chin and try to force me to look at him. I still refuse, I may be facing him, but I won’t look. I can’t. I will never totally surrender to him. “Amber! Look at me!” he shouts. My eyes dart toward his and widen in shock. “I am taking you to the hospital! Stop fighting me!” we stood there for a bit. I felt weak. It wasn’t the position I was in, of the fighting… I felt as though the life was draining out of me. As my eyelids drooped and the strength to stay rigid left me I saw an expression of horror on his face. My head fell back against the wall and my whole body went limp. The only thing holding me up was him. Hurriedly he took me up in his arms. My arms legs and head drooped over his hard arms. He rushed me out of the house and put me into a car and rushed to the driver’s side “Take us to the hospital, it’s an emergency!” he exclaimed. The car hummed to life. My head was pressed against a cold window. I could feel my eyes closing even more. I could feel his hand touch my shoulder. I was jostled gently and anxiously “Amber, stay awake, you’ve got to stay awake! Oh shit! Fuck! Come on! Aw---why’d you fight me…?” I tried to turn towards him so I could maybe calm him some. He shouted “Hurry up, dammit!” Somehow I felt him right beside me, and we were moving, but he wasn’t driving the car… Who was? He was holding me. His arms were around me tight. My head flopped onto his shoulder. I try to reach up to pull him off me, I don’t know him. This is too weird… I mean he seems… nice… but… I don’t have the strength. It just brushes against his weakly “It’s going to be okay.” He grabbed the hand I moved as if he thought I was trying to hold his. He started stroking my hair with the other “you’ve got to stay awake, babe. You can’t go to sleep. You probably have a concussion. Stay with me.” A concussion? That would make sense. The way I was being held right now made me want to sleep more than anything, and I think he realized that. He stopped what he was doing “No. No, don’t fall asleep. I-I think I’ve gotta keep you moving.” He grabbed my arms and started moving me around in an attempt to keep me conscious. “Babe, I need you to try to talk to me. I gotta keep your brain awake. Can you do that? Talk to me. What’s my name?” he waited a second for an answer. An answer that wasn’t coming. I didn’t know. I couldn’t tell him… if… I could? At any rate I couldn’t muster the strength to open my mouth, much less get over my crippling shyness. “O-okay, then what’s your name?” It’s Amber? Right? Is that my name now? What’s in a name? Something about a rose… well, I couldn’t answer that either. All I can do is weakly stare at this man who obviously cares a great deal about this woman try to keep someone he loves alive, asking questions. Questions I couldn’t begin to answer. He looked up and a light of hope glimmered in his eyes. “We made it!” he shouted with a mixture of relief and a pure fear that was still very much there in his voice. We pulled into the hospital where there were EMT’s standing by they pulled me out of the strange car, put me on a gurney and whisked me away into the building. The tiles on the ceiling whizzed past me as I sped through the halls to a room. A light flashed in front of my eyes and I heard the muffled voices of what had to be… doctors…? Nurses…? I was being poked and prodded. Everything went black. Well, this wasn’t expected… I hope everything works out… well, I still got to live for a few minutes I was… truly… happy… though this is so messed up, through the fear, the pain…through it all. For a few moments, I was… happy… like I’d never been before… no distractions, no shallow joy, no simply being content… Happiness. I was me. I was really me… the light of the morning woke me from my sleep. I opened my eyes. My arm itches. I scratched it, shaking something loose. I scooted up and directed my gaze to the weight on the side of my bed. It was him. Was he sleeping there next to me all night? His head rose. He stretched and yawned. He looked and me “Oh, you’re awake? You’re awake! I’m so happy that you’re okay.” he said as he threw his arms around me. I squirmed pushing him away giving him an annoyed confused look. This time he consented and backed off “what’s wrong? Are you mad at me…? You know who I am right?” No, no I don’t. I wanted to say it, but I couldn’t. I can’t speak to him, what would I say? Besides that for some reason, I feel like I couldn’t speak if I wanted to. I’m so overwhelmed by all this. I looked down at my clasped hands. The doctor rushed in relieved to see my sitting up on my own power. He messed around with some wires next to the bed. “You unplugged to heart monitor Mrs. Wolfe.” The grey old doctor stated casually. Was that what that itchy thing was…? Wait… Mrs.... Wolfe…? What?! No! I’m… um… What?! I was so shocked I couldn’t even blink. My face gave away my shock because the doctor gave me a strange look. “I shouldn’t have told you that. I can tell by your face that came as some shocking news. No, I should’ve saved it for the questionnaire. Sorry about this, but we’ve got to determine if you have amnesia. I suspect the result will be a positive.” The man from before looked at me then the doctor worriedly “Amnesia?! You mean, she really doesn’t remember me?” the doctor shrugged and said “well, let’s see.” He turned to me. ”Mrs. Wolfe. Do you know who this man is?” He pointed at a hopeful and distressed man. I looked at them both frowned in pity for the hopeful man looked down and shook my head. “Well, that solves that.” the doctor said bluntly. The man held his head in his hands. “This is your husband Nick Wolfe. I’ll give you a few seconds to process all this. Then we must get to the questions.” He said. Nick huh? Nice name… still don’t know him, but nice name anyway… Nick looked completely devastated. Destroyed. What else could I do? Lie? That wouldn’t last. How long could I pretend to know him? Not long that’s the answer. Literally three seconds passed “So, There are only three questions so let’s make this quick and then I’ll leave you two alone and get the release forms sorted. First question. Do you know where you are?” I didn’t answer. I knew I was in a hospital, though I didn’t recognize any of the instruments… they were strange and foreign to me. I just found out I was married to the man I already had difficulties talking to, and he was sitting right there staring a right through me. The doctor let out a breath “can’t talk? I don’t blame you. I would be flustered too. Do you think you could write your answers?” I nodded. He swung a tablet from behind the bed and handed me the pen that was chained to it. I looked at Nick worriedly. “Mr. Wolfe, would you mind leaving for a few minutes?” the doctor asked. Nick stood quickly “She’s my wife dammit! Why---“the doctor interrupted “she overwhelmed and your presence is making this situation take longer than it needs too!” he snapped. I jumped. Nick stomped out. Maybe now that he’s gone I can summon the courage to speak. I wonder what my voice sounds like. With that thought I couldn’t bear to say a word, at least until I was alone. “Better? Now, let’s get back to the questions. Where are you?” I wrote on the tablet “Hospital?” and showed it to him. “Yes, very good. What’s your name?” he looked down and wrote something on his tablet. I wrote “Amber Wolfe?” He looked at me and tisked “I may have given you that one. Middle name?” I hesitated. I didn’t know this persons middle name… How could I answer? I shook my head, and looked down. He wrote something again. “Okay. Last one. What year is it?” I knew that, of course it was 2016, so I quickly wrote it down and showed him. His eyebrows raised “No… no it’s not… It’s the year 2061.” That’s almost fifty years! How? He gets up from his chair and paces for a few seconds. He looks at me and taps his tablet. “Mrs. Wolfe… Do you have dyslexia by chance?” he chuckled. “Well you answered the questions right… I guess… We can discharge you immediately. I’ll let your husband back in.” He opened the door and spoke to Nick “She’s okay to leave… There does appear to be some memory loss. I don’t believe it’s severe however… Get her around familiar surroundings and it should come back to her. You can leave at any time, just sign out at the front desk.” Nick looked at me and sighed a sigh of relief and dismay. “Okay, hon… Let’s go home.” Nick helped me out of the bed. It was at that time I noticed a breeze and quickly pulled the bed sheets around me, blushing. Nick looked at me at a loss and realized what I was doing. “Really? Babe, I’ve seen you naked before you know…” I hid my face in the sheets. “Okay, I’ll leave and let you get dressed. Here are your clothes.” He set my clothes on the bed and left to guard the door to the room. I grabbed my underpants and pulled them on first under the gown. Followed by the bra… It did give me a little trouble, but I figured it out… then the rest of my clothes. Simple, I was dressed. I sat on the edge of the bed for a minute. I was alive. I don’t know what happened, or what was coming next, but I didn’t really care. I was me, I could handle anything that came my way. The door opened and Nick popped his head in. He saw me sitting on the edge of the bed and opened the door the rest of the way. I threw the pillow at him crossed my arms and scowled at him. “Okay! Sorry. I should’ve knocked. Would you have answered?” he said. Honestly, I don’t know. I wanted to get a moment alone to test my voice in privacy, but I get the feeling that won’t happen soon… “Look, I’m concerned about you. That was pretty traumatic. I… Love you.” My heart skipped a beat and I looked at him for a little to long. “D-do you love me…?” he asked nervously. No, I don’t. I mean, I appreciate you saving my life and all… I appreciate the fact that you love me… But I don’t feel the same way… I want to, that would be nice… It would be easy. But, life isn’t always easy. I wanted to say these things to him, but… again… I couldn’t bring myself to. Instead I looked down and put my hand on his… He grasped it like he was afraid I would fly away. I stood. He stood. In silence he led me to the car. He opened my door for me. I got in. I looked at the driver side, there was no steering wheel. Nick got in. He shut the door and said “Home.” Like that the car started up and we sped away. I turned to the window. The silence was broken after a while “Are you going to talk to me?” I looked at him. He waited for an answer. I think I will… later… Not now. I gave a weak smile and nodded. He huffed and looked way briefly then looked back. “Now?” he insisted. An angry look flashed on my face as I looked at my lap. I gave my head a quick and definite shake. “Yeah. It’s okay. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t push you like this. I just want things to go back to normal. I’m not thinking about you enough I guess…” I wanted to reassure him… What could I do? I leaned over to the side and put my head on his shoulder. It seemed to cheer him up. “Still the same Amber I see.” He chuckled “I called my parents and told them what happened… But, wait… You don’t even know what happened do you?” I shook my head on his shoulder. “Well… you were getting ready so we could go to Mom and Dad’s house, and the neighborhood kids were out in the street playing baseball with rocks in the street and Jackson, the big one, hit a big one straight through the window… it hit you in the back of the head… Do you remember what happened after that…?” I frowned and nodded. He hesitated. “Well, the holes been fixed, and everything’s… most things are back to normal… you were out for two days… I stayed by your side most of the time. There were some things I had to take care of. The window and all. I wanted it to be fixed by the time you came home. Do you know what day it is?”  I shook my head. It appeared to be winder, though I couldn’t be sure what day, or even month for that matter. He frowned “Oh, it’s December 22nd. We were going to see mom and dad on the 20th but… you know. I rescheduled. We’re going on the 24th now. They haven’t met you yet you know. They really want to.” Wait, I thought we were married… and I haven’t met his parents? Did we have a wedding? As if he were reading my mind he said “and no, we haven’t had the ceremony yet. That’s on the first. Then the honeymoon…”Woah, Honeymoon? I barely know you. I can’t marry you… or… more… I already am I guess, but still. No. Where are my parents I wonder…? Oh… 2061. Well, there’s no guarantee this is even the same dimension. “I hope our parents get along.” He said. Of course she has parents but mine… are gone. We arrived “Home” He got out and I tried to figure out how to open the door. It opened, but only because he opened it for me. I hurried to the front door ahead of him… There‘s no knob. How do I open this? Right behind me Nick came and opened it for me… again. “I suppose I should give you a tour. You probably don’t remember, huh.” I stepped into a large room. To my left the staircase and balcony. To the far left an open doorway. Ahead of me an open doorway leading to a hall with a few more doors. To my right an open wide doorway, the living room. He motioned to the right “let’s start here shall we?” he grabbed my hand and led me to the wide doorway. “This is the living room” It was beautifully decorated. There was a fireplace, a huge television in front of a big leather couch. A stereo system with an open area in front of it. A door in the far back of the room, and there was a big Christmas tree in the corner. It’s a very festive room. He leaned in towards me “Santa told me you’ve been a good girl.” He smiled and led me back to the hallway at the end of the entry room. The first door on the left. He opened the door and led me in. “The restroom. It’s a bathroom… we don’t use this one a lot.” It was a very nice bathroom. It has a walk in shower and a fancy looking toilet. It was kind of sparse though. It was still decorated nicely. The next room he led me to, the one next to this one, was a nice room, not really my style… but it was still nice… okay I hated it. It was dark. There was sports memorabilia, trophies. Model cars. A glass sliding door with some tall blinds over it. I looked at him forcing a smile. He could tell. He laughed “you always did hate this room! It is the only one you didn’t decorate after all. I know you don’t care for most of this stuff, so I’ll breeze through a few things I’d like to point out. Okay?” So I did decorate all the rooms, err… she did… But the way she looks, her style… it’s all so similar. With the same awkward smile on my face I nod my head. He led me to the trophies. “These are my trophies. I earned them on my high school and college baseball team. You landed quite the baseball legend. I was the talk of the school every game.” To the memorabilia “This is my collection. It’s not much. Just a few things I picked out here and there.” Models “Here are some Model cars we built together, and a few I built alone. Originals are hard to find, so I 3D print a lot of them.” An out of place corner. A book case, a couple of chairs a lamp and an end table with a picture of us on it. And some things I liked here and there. “This is my Amber corner. I put this here to remind me of you.” I stood a little closer to him. Still it was a very masculine room overall. He led me out of the room across the hall. He opened the door “This is your studio. You do all your art stuff here. You’re really good at it.” There was a long window on the far wall that continued around the far corner of the room. A computer. An easel, a drafting table. A sitting area, loads of boxes. A microphone. Cameras. a mannequin fabrics and a sewing machine. Everything any kind of artist could want. He led me by the hand to the room next to it. “This is your antique room.” It-it’s a room full of 90’s stuff, and earl 2000’s nostalgia… “I don’t know why you like all this old stuff… But, hey you probably don’t know why I like sports… you actually said that before, Ha!” there was a retro TV on the far side of the room, and an old brown weaved fabric sofa in front of it. Old game systems in front of the TV. Old toys on all the shelves. Dolls games figures. A wonderland. This is where the door in the living room led. He brought me back into the entry and into the last doorway. It’s the dining room windows and some sliding glass doors line the back wall. There’s a bar on the near side separating the kitchen from it, all brand new furniture. Again, like I suspect nearly every room in this house, beautifully decorated. He pointed at the table and leaned in “That’s the first place we made love in this house.” I shuddered. He laughed lightly. Back and up the stairs there was the bedroom, a guest room, a half bath, and the most luxurious bathroom I could ever imagine. It was attached to our bedroom. I really wanted to take a bath… I wanted nothing more. He saw me eyeing the shower. “You want to take a bath?” I nodded. “I’ll get our clothes.” I crossed my arms thinking of a way out of this one. “All you’ve got to do is tell me you want one alone, you know.” He left and showed me to my closet. All sorts of clothing… I chose something cute and comfy. There was almost nothing but skirts, and the only non-heals were a pair of converse and some Mary-janes… I got my clothes and went back to the bathroom. When I was about to go shut the door Nick returned with his clothes. No! Not happening! I pushed him… I made no head way, but Push I did anyway. “Hey, hey. No couple’s bath? Okay. Whatever my little mermaid wants, she gets.” He said trying to be cute. Not cute. He backed out and prepared for a kiss, but all he kissed was the door. I locked the door and listened for him to leave. When I was sure he was gone I turned on the water. I have a moment to see what my voice sounds like now. I opened my mouth and said “Hello?” It was beautiful, like music. Amazing. My eyes brimmed over with tears. I spoke again “This is my voice.” I covered my mouth so he wouldn’t hear me crying. The bathtub filled up. I took my clothes off and got in. I washed my hair and scrubbed myself clean. Afterwards… I got curious… I mean… you know… I wonder what… that… would feel like… I hear it’s ten times better for women… I decided to try it out… I slipped my hand down below the water, and between my feminine legs… and started. I closed my eyes and laid my head back. I tried to think of sexy thoughts… But my mind kept wondering back to nick… I wonder what it’d be like to be with him… I couldn’t control it. I was reaching the end. It lasted much longer than ever before. I couldn’t help making noise. Noise that Nick heard I’m sure. I quickly finished washing up and started getting dried and dressed. Half way through I heard a pounding on the door “Amber?! Are you okay? I thought I heard you scream for me!” Oh crap! “Say something or I’m breaking the door down!” I was barely finished drying off and had just grabbed my clothes when Thud the door broke off the hinges and swung open. I tried to hide my shame with the towel, but it was too late. I was standing there nude if front of him. He saw everything. I was so embarrassed. Closed my eyes tight and screamed with all my might. Nick stayed where he was, like nothing just happened “Good you’re okay. Why are you screaming I’ve seen you naked before! Relax, we’re married. Please.” So I through the soap at him. Then, I through the shampoo, and the conditioner, my razor. Anything within my reach! Just when I was starting to think this arrangement might not be the worst ever. He backed out of the room. I quickly got dressed, and came to the realization that I wouldn’t be using this beautiful tub, it’s water jets, or its rainfall shower for some time now. I locked the bedroom door and jumped under the covers. I felt so embarrassed and violated that I wanted to shrink down to nothing. A few minutes later there was a knock on the door. “Babe, I’m sorry. Please unlock the door.” I wasn’t planning on that any time soon. “I’m worried about you. I don’t want you to be alone. I know nothing is going to happen, I’d just feel better that’s all.” I didn’t want to see him right now, but I couldn’t let him suffer. I knew how it was to worry about someone you love… okay… fine. I’ll open the stupid door. I got out of bed and walked over to it. I turned the lock and opened it a crack. Just enough to glare at him. He could feel the intensity. “Listen… Uh… About that... from before… I… um… I shouldn’t have barged in on you… Why did you yell for me though…” I blushed hot red and slammed the door in his face He ruined his me privileges. A few seconds later I realized that was the wrong decision, because through the door I heard an exclamation “Oh! I get it!” Oh, god will this embarrassment ever end? It just gets worse… “Babe, there’s nothing to be embarrassed about Thinking about your husband in that way isn’t a bad thing. It’s good. I just wish you had told me you were in the mood. You’re not… still in the mood… are you?” Ugh… I can’t even… I don’t have the words… I wasn’t “in the mood”…He’s making this so much worse… Why won’t he leave me alone? Well I’ll answer his last question as effectively as I know how. The lock on the door clicked shut with a sound that could only mean “Fuck yourself!” Immediately I heard from Nick on the other side. “Oh come on, babe!” I ignored him and decided to take a nap. I slept right through lunch. It was 4:00 by the time I woke up. My embarrassment was over for the time being. I decided to see what Nick was doing. I walked over to the door and opened it. I looked outside it. He was nowhere to be seen. I went downstairs. I figured that there’s a big TV, where else would he be? Sure enough the TV was on. Sports… He was on the sofa fast asleep. I grabbed the throw and covered him up. I started to tip toe out of the room then I felt him pull my arm. I fell right on top of him. He had me around the waist. “Stay here for a while.” I couldn’t exactly get away without hurting him in some way or another. so I stayed sat there. This man had a wife a few days ago… who am I to take that away from him… should I play along? He’d want something I might not be willing to give him if I did. Should I tell him the truth? Both options seemed impossible. Maybe I could try to see what Amber saw in him. Maybe I could grow to like him as much as she did… He started rubbing my waist up and down.  Nope! I turned and slapped him. “Ah! Woah, what’s that for?! I thought we were having a nice moment together.” I’ll admit it wasn’t necessarily… bad… No! I can’t! I can’t even speak to him. I don’t even know him! But then… not talking to him isn’t going to fix that… He didn’t deserve to get slapped… just after what he said earlier upstairs I thought he might be expecting something. I should apologize to him… and start speaking to him… preferably at the same time. I went back he was sitting there slumped over talking to himself “I guess I deserved that. I guess I’m just a stranger to her, I should try to be more sensitive to her needs. I need to say I’m sorry… again… ugh… I want her back… I don’t know what to do.” It’s just as hard on him… He gets up and turns towards me. “Nick?” I say cautiously. His Eyes water up and he smiles “W-what did you say?” I walk over to him. “I’m sorry I touched you like that I---“I interrupt “Nick.”  He looks me in the eyes. It makes me uneasy. I sit next to him “Yes my love?” he says. I pause for a second or two trying to build up the courage to say something. Anything. Preferably an apology. “I’m sorry I slapped you…” Nick smiles. “That’s okay. I’m just glad you’re talking to me. I was afraid you didn’t love me anymore.” He says honestly. I don’t… I don’t think I do… Do I? “I don’t know you…” I say I know it’s going to break his heart, but it needs to be said. “I know you.” Do you? I don’t think you can. I’m not the same person he knew. I’m someone else. “Let’s get to know each other again. I’m going to take you out for dinner. We’ll go to your favorite place. We’ll talk.” My favorite place? Where could that be? “You’d better get ready. It’s getting late.” Get ready? I don’t even know where we’re going… What do I wear?  “Wear something elegant.” Okay, then… I’ll go see what I have. I rush upstairs. “No hurry!” he shouts after me. I open the closet and spend a while picking between the black dress and the red dress… I end up pick out a beautiful silver one instead. I straighten my hair and start putting on some makeup. I can do this. It all takes me about two hours… yeah… pretty fast, I’d say. I open the door and a rush of something delicious wafts by. I make my way down the stairs in my red heels. It’s dark outside, all the shades and drapes are drawn and the only lights are from the decorations and a flickering light coming from the dining room… oh, what did I get myself into? I turn the corner He’s waiting on me. Dressed in a suit. A candlelit meal set behind him. “You look amazing.” He mumbles. He takes my hand leads me to my chair and pulls it out for me. I sit. He goes to his chair and sits down. “How? How did you know?” he smiles “I know you.” I’m speechless “I knew it’d take you forever to get ready.” he laughs. “I knew that you liked to stay in on cold nights, a nice candlelit home cooked meal. I know this is your favorite food. Followed by some music some dancing… after that we can wind down before bed with your favorite movie. I know you likely won’t be in the mood for anything else.” I don’t think I will be. Anything can happen I suppose. I just traveled through time and space a few days ago. “So… What’s my favorite movie? “I say as I take a bite. “Well, that’s what gave me the idea in the first place. You’ve been acting so much like her today. Little Mermaid.” How did he know? I sit there stunned wondering how it’s possible that we’re so much alike… “I know, I know. It’s like I’m psychic right?” I focus on the food. “How are you feeling?” He’s still worried about me… I pause… How am I feeling? I don’t know. “Okay.” He looks at me disappointed at my answer. “It must be confusing… I can’t imagine.” I want to change the subject. He seems like he may be the type who can be distracted by his ego. “The foods great.” I say hoping it will be effective. “Trying for a diversion, huh? Okay, we don’t have to talk about that anymore.” I look to the side. Alright, maybe he’s not egotistical, how’d he know what I was up too. He points at his head “Because I’m psychic.” I get chills up my back. He really does know me… How...? I must have jumped into another dimensional version of myself… there can’t be someone else out there who, not only looks like me, has the same interests, and thinks like me too boot. Even a relative. We talked for a while and I found out more about myself that I already knew. He predicted more of the things I was thinking and was going to say before I said it. He was kind of a show off. Not annoyingly so, or arrogant. Like a boy trying to impress a girl he liked on the playground. We finished up our meal. He got up took the dishes up and run them under some water in the sink.  He brings dessert. Chocolate covered fruits… uh oh… he does know me. He must know what chocolate does to me… Maybe I won’t eat much? I mean its chocolate… I can’t resist chocolate… I look up at him “Maybe we should skip dessert?” He sits down next to me “Just a couple?” he grabs a cherry by its short stem and offers it to me. I hesitantly take a bite. He finishes it. A Strawberry… before I know it the plate is empty. He took my hand again and led me into the living room. It was twinkling with all different colors of light, and shiny garland. “Play romantic playlist.” He said when we neared the open space in the room. Music started playing. It was one of my favorites. He turned towards me, put my hand on his shoulder, and put his free hand on my waist gently. I feel like this body is fragile. Much more so than my last one. And I feel he knows that as well. We sway slowly to the beautiful music. I get caught up in the moment.  I close the distance between our bodies and rest my head on his chest. He kisses the top of my head and rests his cheek on it. I put both of my hands around his neck. He puts his other hand on my waist. The next song plays. Again, it’s one of my favorites. After a while I’m so enchanted by the evening I can’t think straight. I look up at him. He looks down at me. I can’t reach him, but he knows what I want and closes the distance. We kiss deeply. He lifts me up and carries me up the stairs. Are we doing this? Did his plan work? It hardly seems fair, but right now I don’t care much. My arms tied around his neck as we kiss each other the whole way to the bedroom I threw on my night gown and ran down stairs. He was there making us some breakfast. “Woah, someone’s got a lot of energy. More than I can say about last night…” he chuckled. Pleased with himself. I can’t believe I let him do that to me! I blushes furiously “I’m pregnant Because of you!” well, it was my fault too, but I wasn’t going to let him know that, though I suspected he already did. “Relax. Even if you forget, I’m on birth control too. So, no you’re not Preggers. The odds are astronomical.” He’s… on birth control? “How can you be on birth control? You’re a guy…” I asked genuinely. He found if funny “Men have had birth control for over 40 years now, you know that Amber.” They have? I didn’t know… all my info is outdated… “I was going to bring you breakfast in bed, but since you’re already down here sit down and I’ll fix your plate.” He started putting my plate together. “I’m glad you finally came around.” He said happily. If crossed my arms “I didn’t, you poisoned me.” He laughed. He brought me a plate of waffles yogurt and fruit with orange juice. “That’s a little harsh isn’t it?” It did look good… “I think you know what you did.” I huffed angrily. He patted me on the head “And, I’d do it again.” He was smug. He went to sit down and eat his food. A plate of waffles sausage, and bacon. Wait… He did it again… last night’s dinner wasn’t a coincidence… he knows I don’t like eating meat. “Besides, you liked it. I know you did.” Yeah sure… I don’t like that attitude… “Babe, I’m not trying to be smug. I know what I did, yes… I fed you chocolate. I know what it does to you. I also know, however, that we both enjoyed every second of it.” Thank you by the way.”

[luna-faye-blog]

hmmm

[luna-faye-blog]

I had to immortalize the magical encounter I had yesterday

[luna-faye-blog]

lightly shake your phone side to side