malodorousmalcontent

[malodorousmalcontent]

Stereoplasm Review: Part 2

Hi everybody.

It's been a day. And i'm trying to make this day mildly less garbage, and keep on trucking, keepin' active, treating myself to nice things. I have taken myself out to a nice lunch. I have bought a big ol' steak to make for dinner. I am doing fun stuff. I might draw today. I might play Bad Bethesda Videogames today (you know which one i'm talking about). But, what I know for sure is that i'm writing part 2 of my Stereoplasm reviews today. Right here.

Right

now

So buckle up boys n' berries, i'll be reviewing Gone Gnome, Libatious Leprechaun, Green Gremlin, Scorpling, Lights Across the Sky, Kindling, Selasphorus Calliope, and Divine.

GONE GNOME (PERFUME OIL) || Top notes of cilantro and key lime rooted in fresh garden basil, english cucumber and melon blossom.

I've talked a lot about this one since I got this order, because it's made a pretty big impression on me. To put it simply: imagine walking into your local grocer, and walking up to the produce section. You look upon the fresh herbs, which have just been misted. Ultimately, you just... Take a fistful of them, indiscriminately, and just. Shove 'em straight onto your nose.

That's what this smells like.

This is the first herbaceous perfume that hasn't smelled dry and buzzy to me, and the first green perfume that hasn't, ultimately, left me uninterested in wearing it. It's smooth and fresh, very wetly green, with a hint of pepperiness, a hint of mintiness... It's lush, and delicate, and just. Good.

Looking at the notes, the the cilantro and the basil is definitely responsible for the smooth greens, the super-subtle pepperiness, I bet the mintiness is actually just the freshness of the basil - and I bet all that WET smell is coming from the cucumber, which is lovely. The key lime and the melon blossom come out more in the drydown, but they're both very subtle: the former just adds a little touch of citrusy zinginess, while the latter give the scent a very soft, smooth floral edge. And like.. That citrus is very realistic - like smelling the outside of a lime rather than its juices.

Wears lightly on me, and lasts about 3-4 hours before disappearing.

tl;dr: fresh, smooth, wet, exceptionally green herbs that, on the dry down, are joined by the barest hints of citrus peel and a soft floral.

RATING: 4.5/5. Solidly green perfumes aren't usually my ballgame - they're not bad, i'm just don't care about 'em too much - but this is definitely the best green perfume i've smelled.

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LIBATIOUS LEPRECHAUN (PERFUME OIL) || Aged whiskey and oak reveal prickly pear, spicy ginger and feisty bergamot.

I couldn't quite figure out what this smelled like to me at first, but now I have it: green apple candy, like a jolly rancher or something. It's a really warm, lightly spiced scent with a candy-tart edge. Dries down to a smooth, kinda tangy smell. Makes me think of citrusy tea.

And, looking at the notes... Yep! They fit, easy to peg everything to everything. The warmth comes from the whiskey, the prickly pear smells like apple candy, the ginger gives it that spiced quality, and what it's drying down to is a smooth, mellow bergamot. It's nice! Not so complex that I can't pick out notes, but it still has a little depth. And, in general, it just... Smells good.

tl;dr: Tart green apple candy with a bit of booziness that dries down to a smooth, sweet bergamot.

RATING: 4/5.

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GREEN GREMLIN (PERFUME OIL) || Juicy bamboo, slimy lychee skins, sour green apple cores and rustling tall dry grass.

I've tried this one on several times over several days at this point, and for some reason, my brain's having a hard time with it. I just keep expecting it to smell more complex, to dry down to something different than the notes immediately at the forefront, and when it doesn't, my brain just. Short-circuits. I have no fricken' idea why.

Anyways, this smells like fruit.

Specifically, it smells like tart green apple juice with something under it that gives the scent a bit of a bright, tropical twist. And... Reviewing this on a blind sniff, that's basically all I get, from beginning to end.

Looking at the notes: lychee skins n' apple cores. That's it. That Is The Scent. Primarily apple on me, with the lychee underneath giving that kinda tropical berry smell. I'm assuming the bamboo is contributing some wetness, thus the 'juice' quality to the scent. At no point do I get the grass.

This is one of Stereoplasm's scents that goes pretty light on me - I regularly have a hard time detecting it on my skin. No sillage on me. However, what I can smell, I smell for a good handful of hours.

tl;dr: Apple juice and bright, tropical lychee.

RATING: 3/5. It smells real good, but i'm a bit disappointed that it's got no lasting power on me and that I lose half the notes.

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SCORPLING (PERFUME OIL) || Hopeful and bright young tulip stems, green cactus, sun dried leather, burnt ironwood and tall flowering lilac grass.

So, without looking at the notes, I feel like i'm smelling aloe vera. I don't even necessarily know if this is actually what aloe vera smells like, but the smell of this makes me think of it: very green, and very wet, and a little... Not medicinal, but it has that, 'I could slather this on me to make me feel better' smell. Weird to say, but this makes me think of the smell of like, unscented skincare products. A moisturizing gel. Smooth, seriously wet I am not kidding, maybe a little eensy weensy bit sharp.

Looking at the notes... Alright, the wetness and green-ness coming from the stems and cactus, definitely. If the tulip stems are supposed to have a floral quality to them, I don't really get it, and i'm guessing cactus probably smells kinda like aloe vera, since they're kinda, y'know... *Gestures vaguely*... Similar. Succulents and cacti and cacti and succulents. Anyways.

The leather's there, but it's VERY faint, like all these greens are just piled on top of it. It's more of a new leather note than a worn leather note, but it doesn't encroach new car interior territory, thankfully. I don't particularly get anything woody, let alone burnt wood - but my skin is notorious for minimizing wood notes - and the lilac grass might be supplying a slight indolic quality to the scent, but it's not strong.

When I first tried this on it was so light I could barely smell it, and now it's decidedly detectable on my wrist, but doesn't have much sillage.

tl;dr: SUPER wet light green smell on a subtle background of new leather.

RATING: 3/5. Nice, but doesn't interest me too much.

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LIGHTS ACROSS THE SKY (PERFUME OIL) || Circles of sun-bleached wheat, twilight musk, English lavender and upturned fennel bulbs. Shaking saucers under steaming cups of Earl Grey sink into comforting vanilla cream.

So, I refuse to look at the notes yet, because I genuinely have no fricken' idea what's in this, and i'm gonna make a guess and see how close I get. Okay. Here we go

My guess on first whiff: Anise and Lavender. It's got a soft edge of kinda more herbal lavender, and that sort of earthy, gummy quality of anise, though it's not an overpowering anise... Which is good, 'cause I don't like anise. There might be something kinda... Fruity-orangey in there, too? But then again, I just ate a blood orange, so maybe i'm smelling orange juice from my fingers. Hm. It's very light, and if I had to make ooone more guess about what's in there, i'd think maybe ozone or petrichor.

And, looking at the notes - not anise, but fennel, which I hear smells very similar, aaand lavender! Not too bad. The orangey scent is probably bergamot from the earl grey note - why do I keep going 'oh, smells like smooth citrusy tea!' and still totally fail to identify it as bergamot? Anyways. I definitely pick up some well-blended vanilla, too - smooth and a little waxy, as some vanilla notes tend to smell to me. Now that I know the wheat note is there, too, I can detect it - but it's so subtle that if I hadn't known, I don't think I would've realized it was its own note. It kinda just gives the scent this slight cozy toastiness.

The way the notes in this blend makes it smell kinda like a creamsicle with a soft lavender edge. An... Earthy creamsicle, but a creamsicle nonetheless. I really like Stereoplasm's earl grey/bergamot note, dude. It smell so good.

Dries down to more just, soft creamy sweet orangey smell. Lasts for about 3 hours before it starts to fade, and wears pretty close to the skin.

tl;dr: a slightly earthy/gummy creamsicle scent that dries down to a not earthy/gummy creamsicle scent.

RATING: 4/5, because they managed to make a scent with fennel in it and I didn't dislike it. Also because I like creamsicles.

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KINDLING (PERFUME OIL) || Sweet jasmine incense, sunset musk, fresh sativa and strawberry wine.

Caaan-died straaawberries! They smell-a so good!

But seriously, I know I keep going 'this smells like x flavor of jolly rancher' in my various reviews but this smells like a strawberry jolly rancher. Or, like--actually--it smells more like those strawberry candies that every grandmother has that are absolutely delicious and come in the wrapping paper that looks like a strawberry.

You know the one.

This is very sweet and smooth and bright. Young, since it's a VERY candied scent, but I wouldn't mind smelling like this 'cause it just smells so good.

It's hard to distinguish the other notes in this, because ultimately I think they're just blending so well that it comes out to that one, singular scent of Strawberry Candy. The sunset musk, I think, might be responsible for the other half of the candied formula, lending a sweet, warm creaminess, and the jasmine incense... There's a little bit of a floral edge, but it's hard to detect. I definitely don't get anything that smells like sativa.

This has HELLA throw. Even dry, i'm catching whiffs of it from a foot away every now and then. Wears nice and strong on my skin.

tl;dr: STRAWWBERRY CANDY WHY YOU SMELL-A SO GOOOOOD

RATING: 4.7/5. Verging on too young for me, but I really like it regardless.

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SELASPHORUS CALLIOPE - HUMMINGBIRD (PERFUME OIL) || Foxglove Nectar, Honeysuckle and fresh maple leaves.

So, funny story with this one.

I took a whiff of it and was immediately hit with familiarity. It's very strongly floral - a rich white floral with a bit of a hard indolic edge to it and just a hint of sweetness - and I know that I know the scent, but god help me, I couldn't say why. I didn't bother looking up the notes - I just assumed it was the one I could remember, foxglove nectar, and wondered why the heck I would recognize that. I've never smelled foxglove.

I'm mentioning this to my sister - just that it smells very familiar - and she goes, 'doesn't that have honeysuckle in it?'

And I go, 'nooo.' I was, obviously, wrong.

I grew up around honeysuckle, but never really paid attention to what they smelled like - mostly, I thought about what their nectar tasted like. But now, here I am, smelling a honeysuckle note and recognizing it without even knowing what it is. I take it that's a pretty true note.

So, starting out, as stated before, this is strong, lush, true honeysuckle with a hard indolic edge. After about 20 minutes, I start picking up a green-ness from the maple leaf note; I'm so used to smelling dry or decaying leaf notes, so it's interesting smelling one that smells fresh and green. With continued wear, that indolic edge smooths out, and the scent becomes a light white floral on a fresh green background. It's very pretty, actually. A great springtime scent. I still have no idea what foxglove nectar smells like, or if i'm detecting it here.

It's pretty strong, and I can smell it from about 4 inches off my skin.

tl;dr: A strong, realistic honeysuckle note on a background of fresh, green maple leaves that smooths out on the drydown.

RATING: 5/5 for a fantastic honeysuckle note that can trigger my memory without me even realizing what it is i'm smelling.

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DIVINE (PERFUME OIL) || Gooey cherry cake batter, burnt marzipan, fresh cinnamon leaf, orange zest, warm chai cream and roasted hazelnut.

Mmm this is delicious. At first, I get smooth, almost creamy hazelnut, but it fades sort of quickly in favor of a dark dry cherry note - and this is on a blind sniff. Like, I know hazelnut's in there, but if there's not cherry in this bad boy, i'll--i'll eat my hat.

There's something warm and... Almost woody to this? And a muskiness? If I had to make one more guess at what's in here, i'd say a gentle creamy coffee note, but that might be because I drink coffee with hazelnut creamer so i'm getting coffee vibes from that. Overall i'd describe this as dark, smooth, lightly foody-sweet, spiced and sultry. This smells like something a busty femme fatale sort of character would wear.

Looking at the notes, not a lick of wood, but hey there cherry cake batter. Don't have to eat any hats today. I'm pretty sure what's giving me the coffee vibes is a combination of the burnt marzipan giving the scent that sorta bitterness that coffee has, the chai cream, and of course the hazelnut. I'm pretty sure what I was reading as 'musk' was the warmth coming from the chai cream note, as I tend to associate musk with giving scents a sort of humidity. The cinnamon leaf might be what i'm reading as wood - smells planty and spicy and earthy without going too green. Doesn't go red-hot.

With all these strong foody notes, you'd think this would be overpowering, but it's really not - in fact, this goes pretty damn light on me, but that might be less the scent and more my skin chem. I don't have the greatest luck with Stereoplasm's scents wearing strongly on me - about a 50/50 chance - but i've seen them work out real well on my sister.

tl;dr: Warm, creamy, sweet and spicy hazelnut tea accompanied by a dark cherry note. Smooth, spicy and sultry.

RATING: 4/5. I super like this. It made me like a cherry note, which is impressive! But, docked a point for going pretty light on me.

[malodorousmalcontent]

Sixteen92 Review

Hi everybody, welcome to my Sixteen92 review, where I feel unnecessarily self-conscious about how many times I describe scents as 'perfumey'.

I've been sitting on these for a good couple... Weeks? Months? I don't know, but a fateful weekend came where I took a look at my exceptionally busy Notes file, and felt very sad, so I figured i'd knock a couple reviews off my list. Work through all this shit I still needed to review. And that brings us here! Hooray.

I'll be reviewing Kuro Lolita, You Who Swallowed a Falling Star, New Radio, Hydromancy, Telepathy, Mellifera, Vlad Dracul, Paper Moon, and An Excellent Day for an Exorcism.

Hold onto yer butts, folks, this one gets pretty long, here we go

KURO LOLITA (PERFUME OIL) || Black sandalwood, burning resins, straw, porcelain, delicate lace, wet stone, fog, wind-blown leaves.

This smells like a cold rainy fall day in a small southern gothic town, encompassed by farmland, with cobblestone streets and dotted with tiny run-down churches. Bales of hay are speckled around the area: leftover decorations from autumn festivities that happened a week or so ago.

...Just had to get that outta my system, onto the stuff that matters!

The first thing I get, punching me in the nose as soon as I put it on, is sandalwood and damp hay. It's a very warm, woody, dusty scent, with just a little bit of sweet acridness that makes me think there's a dry/decaying leaf note in this (I haven't double-checked the notes yet, so I only remember some of them), and enough petrichor to put the 'damp' in there. The burning resin note comes out after about 10 minutes of wear, and, boy, it's unmistakable: Sweet, with a kick, and a good amount of burniness to it. It smells dark. Like you just walked into one'a those imaginary churches and they were performing a sordid ritual in there, the chapel overrun with incense and candles.

Another 15 minutes, and the sandalwood fades, the resins mellow out some, and i'm mostly left with the hay and that gentle sweet smell of decay. The final note I smell on the drydown: leaves and cold, wet atmosphere. Really interesting atmospheric, evokes a lot of mental imagery.

tl;dr: Sandalwood at first, followed by burning, incensey, sweet resin that mellows out to hay and a decaying leaves note that is present throughout the whole wear. Dries down to leaves and cold, wet atmosphere.

RATING: 3.5/5. Nice, a very good atmospheric, but I feel like it's bordering overly complex, with some of the notes getting lost in the mix and my nose feeling a bit confused. I also don't know how much i'll want to really wear it.

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YOU WHO SWALLOWED A FALLING STAR (PERFUME OIL) || Dark stone fruits, glowing embers, night rose, sweet sandalwood, plum blossom.

Oh, smells like rock candy.

So this is sitting on a weird edge for me. See, "stone fruit" (peach) notes tend to not work on me more often than not: they go acrid in this terrible, burning bodily fluid kinda way, and this... This is sitting juuuust on the edge of that. It's sharp and tart and kinda heady, rounded out by that rock-candy sweetness (which i'm 90% certain is frankincense. Source: I have a bag of pure frankincense), and just like... It's thinking about being a burny bile scent. But not quite. Nooot quite. There's a smooth, perfumey floral undercurrent to this, too. Lots of smells goin' on at once.

The drydown is basically lush, smooth, perfumey, rich-as-hell flowers, with a slight sourness to 'em. It's actually very pretty, that rose is killin' it. I don't get the threat of burning bile anymore, or the rock candy. It's a little humid-smelling, too - a great summer night scent.

tl;dr: Bright stone fruit and powdery, rock-candy-like incense which fades to lush, smooth florals.

RATING: 3/5. Well made, but i'm not big on how the top notes play out at all.

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NEW RADIO (PERFUME OIL) || Vanilla milkshake accord, maraschino cherry, pink lemonade, grass clippings, waffle cone.

So, full disclosure, I had no interest in this scent. I saw it and went, woof, that sounds way too bright and sweet and youthful for me, and passed it over time and time again. I ended up getting it as a free sample when I ordered some of those Sea Salt Hair Sprays, and... Wow. I like it way, way more than I thought I would.

In the bottle, it's... Perfect. It's everything. Rich, foody, smooth vanilla; SUPER bright, almost candied, nice n' tart maraschino cherry (this is the note I was most worried about, too, as I don't like cherries - but this note is perfect). The gentlest edge of sour pink lemonade. A perfect, toasty waffle cone, which is honestly one of my favorite scents... I don't get much grass, but I don't need it. In the bottle, it's the perfect summer scent.

You'll notice I keep saying 'in the bottle'.

It touches down on my skin, and lives in that perfect blissful state for about two seconds, and then, boom. My skin absolutely gobbles up most of those wonderful notes. That bright maraschino cherry? Gone. Pink lemonade? Barely there, just giving a bit of a sour zing. All i'm really left with is vanilla and the faintest hints of that waffle cone note. It's absolutely heartbreaking. Like, it still smells good... But, god, not as good as it could. I might get a scent locket for this, though.

Virtually no sillage, but I can smell that vague warm sweetness on my wrist for a pretty good handful of hours.

tl;dr: A delicious, foody, bright, sweet and warm and toasty summer scent that's a dead-ringer for its notes... That my skin devours instantly, leaving only vanilla, a touch of lemonade, and faint breadiness.

RATING: 3/5. This would be a 5/5 if my skin didn't DEVOUR half of it. RIP, beautiful scent.

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HYDROMANCY (PERFUME OIL) || Fog, cold violet, lichen, ambroxan, mineral accord, petrichor, glass.

This was recommended to me when I went out and asked people for a scent that makes me smell like a ghost, and honestly, this fits the bill pretty well. It's a pretty specific type of ghost, though: the ghost of a waifish maiden who went down with a sinking ship, who you find, suspended frozen above the water, in the air pocket of an underwater cave that she managed to swim to but ultimately starved to death within.

...ANYWAYS

This smells empty, silky, ethereal, dark in a spooky way, and most importantly, pretty darn oceanic and green. The first thing I smell upon putting it on is the lichen and ambroxan, the former being green, sort of dry-smelling (like lichen that's growing just a foot or so above the water, hasn't touched it in a while, y'know), with that weird tang that lichen can have, and the latter giving a very oceanic sweet-saltiness. The mineral accord and petrichor blend really well with the ambroxan note and it genuinely just ends up smelling like very realistic dank cave ocean water.

And then there's the fog and the glass. The Weird Notes.

The fog is less a scent and more a feeling - it makes the entire scent sort of... Soft and fuzzy. It's what's giving it that silky quality. The glass, you can actually smell, and it... Smells like glass, y'all. Cold and clear and giving off a faint sterile scent, but, it's there. Notably, I can only really detect it if I huff so hard that I become anosmic to the ambroxan and lichen, and it comes out more on the dry-down, but. ...Yeah, it's there. Combined with the fog, it's like... The scent equivalent of looking through a window that's become clouded with condensation. If that makes sense.

This doesn't have a ton of sillage - I can just barely detect it from 3 inches away - but wears very strongly on my wrist.

tl;dr: A realistic ocean water scent made fuzzy and silky by a fog note, with a fascinating, realistic glass note that peeks out on the dry-down.

RATING: 4/5. Too oceanic for me, but well made, and that glass note is WILD.

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TELEPATHY (PERFUME OIL) || Winter narcissus, tonka bean, immortelle flower, sleet, ozone, white amber.

When I first got this, it was basically just straight sleet for the entire wear, and I wasn't wild about it. It was a very realistic sleet note, mind you, but that's not necessarily a good thing: the scent basically smelled cold, bitter, and a little dirty, which is not at all what I had been expecting from the notes.

The good news is, after considerable rest, it's verrrry different.

I put it on, and for the first minute, it's still that dirty sleet note, but then it softens up and out comes the florals - Light and lush and just a little stereotypically perfumey-smelling. It's still a little dirty, which gives the scent some complexity, and there's a gentle undercurrent of something sugary-sweet underneath the florals. This is more... Elegant smelling than I think I expected it to be. I expected it to be light and femme and kinda... Younger-smelling, but the actual scent smells like something a very refined woman in her 40's or 50's might wear.

Looking at the notes, yeah, basically what i'm smelling. Florals from the narcissus and immortelle, sweetness from the tonka bean and probably the white amber, and atmospheric, colder, dirtier notes from the sleet and ozone.

It's very, very light on me - if I huff it too much I quickly become anosmic, and while I was getting a little bit of sillage while it was wet, I have to have my nose pressed to my wrist on the dry-down.

tl;dr: A delicate, perfumey floral with undertones of cold, wet, dirty atmosphere and gentle sugary sweetness.

RATING: 4.5/5. I like this quite a bit. Has depth, but isn't overly complex, and the florals and sweeter notes are so pretty. I'd wear this to something very professional. Docked half a point for being so light, though.

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MELLIFERA (PERFUME OIL) || Wildflower Honey Accord (not vegan), Violet, Jasmine Sambac, Vanilla Infused Sugar, Sandalwood.

So, i'm not big on honey scents. Unless the honey is very subtle, it can quickly go super overwhelming and cloying to me. Hex's Papa Legba was downright unbearable with how strong and sweet it was.

Mellifera, though, is not!

I mean, it's very honey forward, don't get me wrong, the honey's basically the star of the show, but it's a different kind of honey. It smells... Clearer. Rather than being overwhelmingly sugary-sweet, it's far more floral, with little pinpricks of something kinda sharp and tart and tingly. It's bordering on being kinda cleaning-supply-ish, but it's not quite there. There might be a citrus note in this? That's what i'm basically getting: Clear, gentle honey with a floral edge, and maybe citrus.

Let's CHECK! THOSE! NOTES

Not a LICK of citrus! Go me. The wildflower honey accord explains the quality of the honey, though, and I bet that sharpness that's a little cleaning-supply-ish is the jasmine. The violets are in there, but they're so well-blended with the other floral notes that I wouldn't be able to identify their trademark Purple Burp smell on a blind sniff. I can recognize them now that I know, but seriously, the other florals balance them out so well.

The wildflower and jasmine pinpricks eventually mellow out to a smooth, bright sweetness - a combination of the vanilla and honey, I imagine. I... Still don't get any sandalwood, which makes me sad, 'cause I love sandalwood. :( My wood-gobbling skin strikes again, I guess.

Virtually no sillage - it wears kinda light on my wrist, and I can only smell it from about an inch away.

tl;dr: A clear, floral honey with pinpricks of sharp jasmine that loses its floral edge on the drydown and simply becomes bright-yet-smooth honey and vanilla.

RATING: 3.7/5. Not bad, but the jasmine is just too sharp for me, and I can't see myself wearing it much.

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VLAD DRACUL (PERFUME OIL) || Carpathian fir needle, red cedar, black amber, black patchouli, scorched earth, opium, blood musk.

This smells like a cologne for someone who dresses in refined clothes but also feasts upon the entrails of freshly-killed deer, so, I guess the name is apt. It's dirty as hell, but in a kind of bright way: like walking around on a very dry fall day through a forest that's all reds and yellows and dry cracked earth with sparse yellow grass. I get a cool airiness from it, and piney freshness, and d i r t. That scorched earth note ain't playin' around. I'm pretty sure that man-stank smell is the blood musk, which is this sorta... Feral, almost pheromonally sweet smell? But it's not bad or actually stinky, just kinda hanging out under the atmospherics.

On the drydown I get a resinous, very light sweetness, I assume that's the opium and/or the black amber, and the atmospheric notes are still there, most notably that scorched earth, but way subtler. It's warm and smooth and just... Prettier than I expected it to be, given the way it started.

tl;dr: A fall atmospheric that's distinguished by its scorched earth note and a sort of pheromonal, feral musk. Dries down to light resinous sweetness and that scorched earth note.

RATING: 4/5.

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PAPER MOON (PERFUME OIL) || Soft vanilla musk, benzoin, oakmoss, trailing ivy, peach blossom, rose.

Mmmm, this is delicious. It's so sweet and mellow with the prettiest, smoothest florals. The vanilla musk is the strongest thing in this, humid and sweet, with a super well-blended floral edge. The florals are kinda perfumey-smelling, but the rose doesn't go overly chemical, is just lush and smooth, and the peach blossom is soft and delicate. I've never encountered benzoin before, so i'm not entirely sure what it smells like, but The Internet says it's a warm and sweet note - I bet it's part of what i'm reading as the vanilla musk. I keep sniffing this looking for the ivy or oakmoss, but honestly, i'm not smelling anything that hits me as particularly green.

The most morphing it does on the dry-down is that the florals mellow out some, but otherwise, it stays largely the same. It wears close to the skin, but is strong on my wrist.

tl;dr: A warm, humid vanillic sweetness with a floral edge that's lush and perfumey from the rose and soft and delicate from the peach blossom.

RATING: 4.7/5. An EENSY bit too perfumey for me, but that's about it.

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AN EXCELLENT DAY FOR AN EXORCISM (PERFUME OIL) || Cathedral incense, black clove, burned parchment, tarnished silver, sacred woods.

Woods. Strong, evergreen woods, with a surprisingly light airiness to them - a real nice cold air note, i'm assuming. Genuinely makes the scent smell cool. The woods are strong and perfumey, which puts them a hair off realistic, but I also get that fresh, sap-sticky (I love that term pardon me for using it across reviews), slightly bitter mintiness that smells very much like the real thing.

I have, literally, NO idea what the notes in this are at the time that i'm writing this, apart from a tarnished silver note - which I think might be part of the cool airiness of the scent, i'm not sure. If I had to take a wild guess, i'd say that there's... Woods, resins, maybe a floral giving that perfumey nature, and some kinda cold air/ozonic note.

Here we go, let's take a peek at zee notes

...Wow, I was way off. At least I got the woods and the cathedral incense must be what i'm reading as resins, and is probably the source of the perfumey-ness, and, by process of elimination, the silver note must be what's making it so cold. The burnt parchment and black clove come out a couple hours into the drydown, giving this a tingly, burning quality, and a good bit of sharpness. The sweetness of the incense rounds it out nicely.

Doesn't have a lot of sillage, but says strong on my wrist.

tl;dr: Perfumey incense, fresh woods, and a cold and clear silver note that dries down to a burning, sharp smell that's still accompanied by the sweetness of the incense.

RATING: 3.5/5. Not bad, I love that silver note, but gets too sharp on the dry-down.

[malodorousmalcontent]

Stereoplasm Review: Part 1

So. Stereoplasm. I'd heard about them. I'd checked them out. But I really only got interested in them when I started getting very invested in making custom scents - i'm an avid writer/roleplayer, and making scents based on my characters is basically the dirtiest siren's call for me. I had gotten one from The Little Book Eater that I was very happy with. It was time to try a different one from another house.

I'm not gonna write too much about the process of ordering from Stereoplasm, because i've already massively raved about it here. So. You can just read that if you wanna know those deets. No, for this, i'll just be diving straight into a few of the scents I got: my five custom samples, and the animal of the month scent I received, Rubecula.

SAMPLE 1 (PERFUME OIL) || Black tea, pink sugar, tea rose, sandalwood, teak, heather, white grapefruit E.O., light grass, pink pepper, tonka.

The black tea at the very front of this one makes this scent start out very, very sharp, and pretty dang soapy, with an edge of sour grapefruit. It's not a 'hot' black tea note, either: i'd say it's more like black tea that's been cooled to room temperature, or maybe just straight tea leaves. The sugar's there, rounding out the grapefruit, and underneath it is a lush, smooth, floral sweetness, which I assume is the tea rose. It's nice - some rose notes can go overly perfumey or hairspray-ish, and luckily, this isn't one of them. No wood notes, though, but woody notes tend to get lost on my skin unless they're VERY strong or it's a real simple perfume.

After maybe an hour and a half of wear, this one begins to fade, and I have a hard time really picking out the particular notes from that point: it's a little fruity-sweet, very femme, and pretty leafy-soapy. The fruitiness almost smells... Tropical? Weird. Maybe it's the tonka working some magic.

tl;dr: Sharp and soapy tea and citrus with a hint of sugary sweetness and lush, smooth rose. Gets a fruity-tropical smell on the drydown.

RATING: 3.5/5. Not bad, but a little bit too much on the soapy side of tea for me.

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SAMPLE 2 (PERFUME OIL) || Ruby red grapefruit, white tea leaf, pink sugar, jasmine & tea rose accord, lotus, sweet grass, pink grapefruit E.O., blackberry.

G R A P E F R U I T. Hard grapefruit. Rich, sweet, juicy, sour, deep red grapefruit that's been sugared just enough to make this feel... Punk, almost. Hollywood cerise with neon yellow splattered over it. It's absolutely delicious. That ruby red grapefruit note is, seriously, to die for: if you're gonna get a custom with grapefruit in it, i'd probably suggest this particular note. The florals are there, but they're very light and delicate, and come out more with wear: they're very smooth, not powdery at all. There's a little bit of green-ness in this, too - it's well-blended so it's hard to pick out in particular, but my sister could smell it pretty well, and I think it's the tea leaf.

The grapefruit eventually fades away and just leaves that elegant and smooth jasmine + tea rose accord, with an undercurrent of that grass note - which is nice, sweet and green and very unmistakably grassy smelling - and just a little bite of bitterness from a very realistic blackberry note.

It's got hellllla sillage - i'll catch whiffs of it all the time while it's wet, and I know my boss could smell it from a good few feet away. It can last up to 6-7 hours on me, but probably starts to fade around the 3-4 hour mark

tl;dr: RICH sugared grapefruit with gentle florals that dries down to an elegant, smooth floral with a hint of grass and bitter blackberry.

RATING: 6/5. I love this. It's beautiful, rich, perfectly meets the mood I was trying to get, transformative, complex while not getting lost in its notes... It's just SO GOOD. This is the one I ended up getting a full size of. It's awesome. *kisses fingertips*

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SAMPLE 3 (PERFUME OIL) || Carnation, tea rose, earl grey, pink sugar, spruce, feminine-woods, white grapefruit E.O., teak, pink grapefruit E.O., pink pepper.

This smells like a rich, velvety, smooth flower that's been coated in powdered sugar, with some hints of citrus - it's not quite reading as grapefruit to me, so I think it might be bergamot from the earl grey note. As it dries down, the powderiness goes away, and that nice, juicy, grapefruit note comes out - not as rich as sample 2's red grapefruit, but probably a bit more realistic; you can almost smell the white filmy skin that covers the grapefruit, y'know?

...Aaaand... This has me craving grapefruit, so i'm gonna just, go, uh... Eat a grapefruit.

.....

.....Okay, back from grapefruiting. (This is not a bit. I actually did this.)

I tend to lose most woody notes on me, as mentioned before, but my sister tried this on and amped the spruce pretty hard: it gave everything a bit of that evergreen minty scent. This lasts for about 3 hours before fading down to a soft, candy-like sweetness.

tl;dr: Sweet-smelling powdery florals amped up with sugar and a citrus edge that dries down to realistic grapefruit, then a simple fruity-candy smell.

RATING: 4/5. I'm not huge on powdery, but this was nice, and that grapefruit E.O note is hella good. Very realistic. Realistic enough to put me on a grapefruit kick.

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SAMPLE 4 (PERFUME OIL) || Musk, dark plum, pink sugar, black tea, white grapefruit E.O., sandalwood, pink pepper, a drop of teak.

This starts out like, 80% plum, dark and cold and lightly tart, with just a little hint of sugar and just enough of a 'drinkable', watery-smelling quality to identify the black tea. Sometimes I can catch whiffs of the musk - sharp and humid - but not too often. As it dries down, the grapefruit comes out, nice and sour but not sharp or astringent, kind of a delicate grapefruit, and the tea is WAAAY more noticible: smooth and green and like, vaguely soapy in the way that tea can be. Not as soapy as Sample 1, tho. I'm also getting the pink pepper, which i'm really excited about! It makes my nose tingle without smelling overwhelmingly, well, peppery. I've had much more experience with black pepper, and this is so much lighter. If I really huff at it, I think i'm picking up... The sandalwood? It's a dusty, warm wood, but very faint, under everything else. Makes a good base for all the other colder notes.

When it dries down, I get a smell that's kind of like tart, tangy bubblegum, and then eventually, an indistinguishable creamy sweetness.

The scent is pretty light - detectable, but not super strong or filling the room. It lasts for a pretty long time, though: I put some on last night and could smell sugary sweetness on my wrists come morning.

tl;dr: Dark, cold plum and sugar with a hint of musk that dries down to drinkable-smelling black tea, delicate grapefruit, a faint base of warm sandalwood, and a sparkle of pink pepper.

RATING: 4.5/5. My second favorite of the scents, but it doesn't quite match the mood I was going for, and a plum note that swings bubblegummy isn't my cuppa tea.

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SAMPLE 5 (PERFUME OIL) || Green tea, pink grapefruit E.O., bamboo, white grapefruit E.O., hot pink sugar (stronger), sunflower, driftwood.

I've already got a name picked out for my custom, but if I were to pick this one, i'd pick something else, and it would, quite simply, be 'pink tea' - because that's what it smells like. At the forefront, unmistakeable green tea - smooth, but decidedly herbal, and not particularly soapy - and pink sugar. I'm testing this wearing it on the inside and outside of my wrists, and it smells different - I assume because my skin on the outside of my wrist is drier, so it's fading more quickly. On the inside, i'm getting a gentle floral sweetness that I can't quite place. On the outside, a woody base, and very subtle... I assume white grapefruit note.

Lookin' at the notes... Yep, this smells about as Green with Pink as those suggest. I don't really have much more to add on it: green tea and green notes with sugar and grapefruit that dries down to a subtly sweet sunflower with a woody driftwood base. OH - it fades kinda fast. Within two hours I could barely smell it. ...But maybe that's because i've just gotten grapefruit juice all over my hands and it's overpowering everything.

I've been, uh. On a pretty big grapefruit kick while writing this.

tl;dr: check that last full paragraph, i've basically got it there.

RATING: 4/5. Nice, with some excellent notes, but not quite what I was lookin' for.

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RUBECULA - ROBIN (PERFUME OIL) || Wild blueberries, wet garden mud, nag champa and vintage musk.

At first: Blueberries, and it's a pretty good blueberry note. I don't like blueberries. Everything about them tells me they're gonna be nice and tart, and then they're way sweeter than I want. Even the sour ones are sweeter than I want. Every blueberry muffin i've ever eaten, i've wanted it to be delicious sweet vanilla complimented by tart zingy blueberries, and every single time it's been a heartbreaking too-sweet disappointment.

And, unfortunately, this is true for this too: it's just... *shakes fist* TOO REALISTIC

But, really, it's very warmly sweet as blueberries tend to be, but also with an edge of tartness that comes out after a few minutes that I big appreciate. It's a very true blueberry scent. Underneath it is a hint of that mud note, which is surprisingly clean for, well, mud - it's like... A gentle earthiness, and a WHOLE lotta wet, like wading through the cool water of a marsh. Every now and then I get something that smells sort of dank and spicey, which I assume to be the nag champa, and then there's the vintage musk, which... Alright, so, it's hard to tell whether it's the blueberries going powdery or the musk, but i'm getting something that smells like makeup powder. I'd say that that powderiness is sort of ever-present, all encompassing everything else. It dries down, basically, to powdery blueberries, and lasts for-fuckin'-everrrr. I was still smelling it into the next morning.

This is pretty, but just a bit too blueberry-sweet for me.

tl;dr: warm, sweet and slightly sour blueberries, powder, and a subtle wet earthiness, with very vague whiffs of spicy, dank nag champa.

RATING: 4/5. Once again, a well-crafted scent with great notes that just isn't quite my jam, because i'm a blueberry hater.

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Stay tuned for part 2 of my Stereoplasm reviews, which is gonna cover Libatious Leprechaun, Green Gremlin, Gone Gnome, Lights Across the Sky, Scorpling, and two scents that I picked up in a swap: Kindling and Selasphorus Calliope.

[malodorousmalcontent]

Solstice Scents Review

Man, finally getting around to writing my thoughts on my First Ever Solstice Scents Order (or two, actually.) I've had all of these for around a month now, and just because of all the other smells i've had going on, haven't really gotten around to them. But i'm taking the time now. Checkin' 'em off my LIST.

I'll be going over my experience ordering from Solstice Scents, as well as the scents Foxcroft, Snowshoe Pass, Violet Mallow, Lace Draped Spectre, Riverside Hayride, Nightgown, White Fox, and Winter Dove. Let's do it to it.

ORDERING FROM SOLSTICE SCENTS

So, not gonna lie, I put off ordering from this house mostly because of their website. I'm a graphic designer, and a bit of a branding snob, and the look of the website, not even considering the purposefully rustic theme, just the way it's built, is a little bit... Dated. Not the worst crime imaginable, but actually navigating the site made it worse: having multiple pages for the different sizes of one scent would clutter pages, not having an easily findeable scent list for their seasonal collections (if it exists, I STILL haven't found it), not knowing what was Just Seasonal and what was GC because of how they'll do limited seasonal releases of GC scents in normally unavailable sizes or formats... It was all very confusing. Their photography is nice, though, I'll give them that. Goes with the general look of the brand well. (And that's not like, subtle shade - I know the difference between a purposefully down-to-earth design, and something lookin' dated. Their purposeful branding, in a general sense, is not dated.)

Placed my order. The drop-down list for available free samples was handy. I wish they mentioned that, if it's your first order, you can ask for an additional free sample - I only knew about that practice from a different review.

TAT was pretty dang fast - a couple days and it was coming my way. The greatest delight, aside from the scents themselves, was their packaging: It's fantastic. A far cry from my complaints about their website. Their designs look good, the cards that came with the order were lovely, I love the little CD-case-type thing that the samples come in, and when I later placed a second order for a 5ml of Winter Dove, I loved the box it came in, too. Love the scent names in that snappy handwriting... It was just, good. Was nice getting actual designed packaging, rather than just bottles wrapped in bubble wrap or in a plain box. Very professional. No leaks. No issues. A good, clean-cut order.

(Additionally, when I did my second order and Lace Draped Spectre was still available on their free sample dropdown, even though it was sold out and wasn't going to be restocked anymore for the season, they still honored it. Which. Hell yeah.)

Overall, very positive experiences! Onto the scents.

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FOXCROFT (PERFUME OIL) || Decaying Leaves, Rich Black Soil, Dry Leaves, Fall Air, Woods, Chimney Smoke.

I put this on, and the very first note I get hit with, without even looking at the notes, is sweet smoke. The first time I ever tried this, that smoke straight-up went BBQ-y for the first five minutes of wear, but it doesn't do that anymore - it's just... Very strong woodsmoke with a hint of sweetness. The smoke fades after just a few minutes, and I start getting the other atmospheric notes: A woody note that smells fresh and sap-sticky, like a newly splintered evergreen branch; dry fall leaves that smell so realistic that I can picture picking them up and crunching them in my hand; the emptiness of cool fall air; and damp earth from a rainstorm that happened the other day. The smoke's still there, kind of encompassing everything, but it's much lighter now.

And... Looking at the notes, I guess that's literally everything that's in it! Dang. Talk about a scent being dead-on. On the dry-down, this takes on a warm, almost... Maple-y quality? Like slightly burnt maple leaves. I like it. It's really cozy.

This wears a bit close to the skin on me without actually being light, but lasts for a pretty long time - a few hours in and even after scrubbing it from my wrist with dish soap, i'm still smelling earth and decaying leaves.

tl;dr: a very realistic fall atmospheric with woody, dry leaf, and damp earth nuances and a nice swirl of smoke. Dries down to a maple-like sweetness.

RATING: 5/5. A really beautiful atmospheric. I'm not really interested in smelling like it, but it's objectively very well made.

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SNOWSHOE PASS (PERFUME OIL) || White Amber, White Musk, Vanilla Accord, Peppermint Cream, Cold Winds.

Mmmm. Mmmm. This smells absolutely tasty. The vanilla accord is rich and exceptionally creamy, with a super true-to-life vanilla extract smell. The peppermint cream blends well with it - it's hard to detect, but gives a slight minty edge to the vanilla. My roommate, from a distance, says it smells like cooked brownies. I don't necessarily agree--it doesn't strike me as chocolatey in the least--but I could see how someone might think that. It might be thanks to the amber - i've noticed some ambers can read a bit chocolate-like.

Admittedly, the cold winds note is kinda gone at this point - it was very present when I first got the sample, but now, I don't really get anything that hits my nose as particularly chilly.

This wears pretty strongly on my wrist, doesn't fade quickly, and obviously has some good sillage if my roommate is smelling it from like, 3-4 feet away.

tl;dr: True to life foody, creamy, rich vanilla with a hint of mintiness.

RATING: 4/5. I wish the white amber and white musk were a bit more detectable to me, and that the cold wind note hadn't vanished. Even so, this is a really delicious, rich vanilla scent.

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VIOLET MALLOW (PERFUME OIL) || Marshmallow Cream, Violet Flowers, Vanilla Bean, White Musk.

This one's easy. It smells ex act ly like a cabbage patch doll's face - that floral-vanilla slightly rubbery scent. Sometimes Solstice Scents' vanilla note will have a bit of that rubbery quality for me, and the violets in this, rather than just living on their own in their signature Purple Burp smell, blends well and amps up the cabbage patch kids smell. Which is great for me, because i've been dying for a perfume that smells like it - I actually asked for this one as my free sample because people had been saying it smells like that. And it does. Spot on.

Wears strong on my wrist, with sillage of like a foot or two when wet, then maybe 6 inches or so when dry.

tl;dr: Cabbage Patch doll!

RATING: 4/5. Kinda simple, but fills a very specific desire in me. I don't even know if i'll wear it that much, but I loooove just having this smell on hand whenever I wanna whiff it. Plus, even if the vanilla/marshmallow is a bit rubbery, I love a violet scent where the violets don't smell bad.

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LACE DRAPED SPECTRE - REFORMULATED (PERFUME OIL) || Vanilla Musk, Spicy Pink Carnation, Pink Pepper, Rose, White Musk.

This... This grew on me so fast, and is now one of my favorite perfumes. Holy shit. This is just so, so good.

When I first tried it out, I took one whiff and went, 'oh! So THAT'S what a carnation smells like!' I was familiar with the smell of carnations, but had never really matched the smell to the flower, but this was so dead-on that there's really just no mistaking it. The connection was made instantly. It's a green, dewy, velvety, heady, smooth, non-powdery, lush-smelling flower, with just a hint of a spicy kick to it - which i'm sure is amped up by the pink pepper. The vanilla musk amps up that delicious carnation and makes the scent a bit humid and sweet. That's about all I can really, for-sure detect in this... But, god, I don't think it NEEDS anything else. It's SO GOOD.

Got HELLA sillage and HELLA longevity - I put this on and can smell it all day. God. I have two 1mls of it and I hope they last me 'til fall. Seriously, it's so good.

tl;dr: A fantastic, realistic carnation note, amped by vanilla musk and with a kick of pink pepper.

RATING: 6/5. This is a holy grail scent, bay-bee. I've had some good florals since, but this was the first good floral. This is the one that changed my mind about florals.

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RIVERSIDE HAYRIDE (PERFUME OIL) || Moist Dirt, White Carnations, Fallen Leaves, Bare Branches, Hay & a Hint of Pressed Apples Carried on the Breeze from Corvin's Apple Orchard.

I put this on, and before I can even close the sample vial, I get hit with this wave of spiced, dried, tart apples - but that gets subtler after only 10, 15 minutes of wear. What I smell at the top at that point is a very subtle, velvety carnation - not nearly as lush as the carnation note in lace-draped, it's more like... If a bed of carnations was a few feet away. It also smells pretty wet, with a notable cool air note, and some damp green-ness. At this point, the apples are so subtle that they're at the bottom of the scent, just a soft sweetness with an edge of tart, very realistic for a dried apple scent, and I can't smell the spices anymore.

Sometimes I also pick up a weird sourness that isn't the apples, and almost smells... Milky? Like milk that's kinda nearing its expiry date and you're not really sure if it's bad or not. I don't get it all the time, and it's not bad enough to ruin the scent, but it's there. Looking at the notes, I think that sour smell is actually the hay.

On the dry-down, that hay gets stronger, and basically all i'm getting is the hay and maybe a hint of the apple. If you like hay, this would be good for you. The last note I can detect before it disappears is tart green apple. Despite not having a lot of sillage, apart from that first wave of apple, this wears VERY strongly on my wrist.

tl;dr: A velvety floral atmospheric with touches of cool air, green-ness, and an ample helping of dried apples, that dries down to strong hay and faint apple.

RATING: 3.5/5. Well made, but I could do without that strong hay note. I say. About a scent with 'hayride' in the name. Guess that's what I get.

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NIGHTGOWN (PERFUME OIL) || Vanilla, White Chocolate, Tuberose & Tiare Flowers.

This is lovely - I actually like it more than I thought I would, since i'm really not into chocolate notes, even white chocolate, and white florals generally aren't my thing. But this blends beautifully: the tuberose and tiare are soft and delicate without smelling soapy or indolic like so many white florals can, and the white chocolate and vanilla round it out, balance the floral qualities, and give the scent some depth. It's really lovely - i've worn it to bed a couple times, so I guess the name 'nightgown' fits.

Dries down to stronger vanilla and realistic white chocolate with a light floral edge. Very elegant and creamy. Wears close to the skin for a few hours before it begins to fade.

tl;dr: Soft, delicate white flowers balanced by gentle, creamy sweet notes of white chocolate and vanilla, the latter taking over on the dry-down.

RATING: 5/5. Another one I probably won't wear a lot, but it's objectively beautiful. Solstice Scents REALLY can do no wrong with florals, i'm beginning to feel like.

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WHITE FOX (PERFUME OIL) || Vanilla Musk, White Fur, Woods, Snow Laced With a Vein of Dirt.

So, reading reviews of White Fox, it seemed to be pretty hit or miss. Half the time, it was a beautiful vanilla scent with atmospheric notes; the other half, burning plastic. I wasn't sure what I would get, but I was willing to take the risk.

What I ultimately get is plasticky vanilla. Not the worst, but, uh, not the best, either. I get something very minty, too, even though peppermint isn't a note in this (maybe it's the woods note, some evergreens), and it makes that plasticky vanilla almost... Burning. Chemical-y. It mellows out some with wear, though: the burniness goes away, and the vanilla becomes less plastic (but not totally un-plastic) and more soft and fuzzy, so, decently wearable. The fur and dirt are distinguishable in this, too, and round out the sweet notes well.

Dries down to a subtle vanilla musk sitting underneath some really notable dirt, and finally, before it fades, become simply dirt and fur. Lasts for a good handful of hours, and has some good sillage while wet.

tl;dr: Burning plastic kinda medicinal smelling vanilla that mellows out to a softer, fuzzier vanilla, rounded out by dirt and fur.

RATING: 3/5. I'm honestly debating rating this a bit lower, because it starts out so bleh, but with wear it's okay. ...But just okay.

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WINTER DOVE (PERFUME OIL) || Vanilla Crystals, Spicy Carnation, Nutmeg, Cream.

Man, this is such good shit. It's not LDS, but by god, it'll do.

For the first, like, 5 minutes, I get straight eggnog from the nutmeg and cream, and then it just becomes this beautiful, rich, creamy carnation note. The carnation's pretty spicy, but more than that, it's velvety, softly floral and green and fresh as hell. Smells real, as SS' carnation note tends to. The sugar crystals give this just a touch of sweetness, and honestly, I don't get the nutmeg as much after those first 5 minutes. It's a soft, rich, delicate scent - definitely would call this LDS' more feminine cousin. On the dry-down, the carnation fades, and the scent becomes much more creamy and foody-sweet without necessarily going back to eggnog.

Has a lot of sillage - i've gotten reports of other people smelling it real well when I walk past. (Notably, my sister said it smelled like a headshop, which kinda surprised me. I think it must'a been the spice in the carnation.) Lasts for a good handful of hours, too.

tl;dr: Eggnog, briefly, and then a sweet and creamy lush carnation scent, and then, on the drydown, creamy sweetness.

RATING: 5/5. Blind bought a 5ml for this because I didn't think I could live without Solstice Scents' carnation note, and I have no regrets.

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So, final thoughts: I really, really love this house. Their florals are killer, their scents are rich and long-lasting, and at the very worst, they might go a little rubbery or maybe a little potpourri-ish, but there's nothing in this that was out-and-out awful or came across poorly made. Gonna be buying from them again, most definitely.

[malodorousmalcontent]

Sucreabeille Review Part 3

Hey y'all, guess who's back on their bullshit! Yeah, that's right, it's me. A lil' backstory: once upon a time, the owner of Suc offered me a coupon to explore her scent catalogue, and through various circumstances, I ended up coming into ownership of, at this point, thirty-fricken-four different scents of theirs. And i'm gonna review all of 'em, dang it.

PART 1 PART 2

So, with that out of the way, today i'll be going over Liquid Gold, Belladonna, Big Damn Heroes, Cersei, Stay Sexy, Shiny, Margaery Tyrell, and The Mountain.

LIQUID GOLD (PERFUME OIL) || Zanzibar spice, lavender fields, bergamot black tea.

IN THE BOTTLE: Smells like a smooth, elegant base with some tang to it and a bit of a floral buzz.

ON THE SKIN: This is lovely - definitely evokes the color gold when I give it a sniff. It’s an elegant, warm, grown-up scent: smooth, a touch tangy, and strangely... Wheaty? Yeasty? ...Earthy? It's hard to describe. On top of that is a beautiful hint of floral that smells almost fizzy. If I close my eyes and sniff it, I feel like i'm standing on rolling hills of golden grain with flowers in the distance. It reminds me of Alkemia's Silken Tent in how mature and stately it smells, despite not actually smelling like it.

Going over the notes, i'm certain that the zanzibar spice is responsible for that earthy quality, and the gentle, smooth, elegant, slightly tangy sweetness is from the bergamot tea - it's the exact same note from You're in a Cult, which I could pick out of a lineup if I had to. The lavender - that gentle floral sparkle - is detectable, but far from overwhelming, like it's just a scent being carried on a warm breeze. The phrasing 'lavender fields' is apt.

On the dry down, the 'tea' part of the bergamot tea comes out more and gives the scent a faint bitterness, and it stays like that until it fades to nearly-nothing around the 4 hour mark. It also wears fairly close to the skin.

RATING: 4.7/5. This is in my top three Suc scents, but i'm docking it a teensy bit for fading kinda fast.

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BELLADONNA (PERFUME OIL) || A freshly picked red rose, old leather, white musk.

IN THE BOTTLE: Cold, black, kinda wet leather. Very chlorine-smelling.

ON THE SKIN: This is all leather and musk to me. It's a deep, cold, black leather smell - the kind that I frequently think of as smelling like inky-black rain. It's a strange, empty scent, that's pretty reminiscent of chlorine, as mentioned before. In my notes I described it as 'a haunting scent for the dead'. If you've smelled Alkemia's The Raven - it's very reminiscent of that. (I've said the same thing in my review of Suc's Let's Be Bad Guys - if they don't share the same leather note, they're certainly very similar!)

Combined with the musk note, this scent ends up smelling like old books: musty, dusty, hardback leather book covers. At no point do I smell anything remotely rose-like - though I do get the teensiest bit of stemmy green-ness.

Dries down to... Well, basically the same scent, honestly. I was hoping the rose would come out more, but it's still inky leather and musk. It had some okay sillage when wet, and five and a half hours later + one scrubbing with dish soap, I can still clearly detect it on my wrist.

RATING: 3/5. I wish I picked up on the rose more, and i'm not wild about the musk, but I've got a soft spot for that inky black leather smell.

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BIG DAMN HEROES (PERFUME OIL) || Rain, salt spray, green fig, warm meadow sun.

IN THE BOTTLE: Fresh-scented soap, with a little green-ness.

ON THE SKIN: This smells kinda like a beachy-scented suave brand conditioner. Mellow, pretty, refreshing-smelling soap. The thing at the forefront is definitely a mixture of the rain and the salty spray, which ends up just smelling like, well, saltwater - but not necessarily oceanic saltwater, so much as tap water mixed with salt. There's a touch of green-ness, but it less stands out as its own note and more just blends in with everything else.

After about three hours, it fades enough that I have a hard time telling the difference between my skin and the scent. It did have a lot of sillage, though, and it smelled really nice from a distance - refreshing, and I could detect some sweetness from the fig.

In my notes, I originally described it as smelling like this image looks, and... Yeah, basically.

RATING: 2.5/5. Nothing particularly special to me.

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CERSEI (PERFUME OIL) || White thyme, freshly ground black pepper, black jasmine, amber.

IN THE BOTTLE: Hardcore dry herbs with a little bit of floral underneath it, barely detectable.

ON THE SKIN: First time I tried this, my immediate thought was, holy crap, why does this smell exactly like oregano of all things? Dried oregano, specifically. I'm now fairly certain it's the thyme + black pepper combination, as I have another scent with those same notes (Shiny, but we'll get to that), that starts off almost the same. I don't detect anything that reads jasmine-y, or even floral, to me, and after about ten minutes of wear, I get an extremely subtle sweetness from the amber.

On the drydown, I start getting a hint of something that smells kinda... Minty? All notes are present as it wears on, though the thyme definitely mellows out some.

Has a whole lotta sillage, and it wears strongly on my wrist for a pretty dang long time.

RATING: 2/5. I don't particularly care for the thyme + black pepper combination, and I wish the other notes came through more.

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STAY SEXY (PERFUME OIL) || Tahitian vanilla, rich honey, fresh grapefruit.

IN THE BOTTLE: Zingy, poppy grapefruit. Makes me think of neon yellows, pinks and purples. I like!

ON THE SKIN: I had a weird experience with this. The first time I ever wore it, it smelled almost exactly like Hexennacht's Daemon on me - like super sweet bubblegum. (Daemon does not normally go bubblegummy, but it sure as heck did on me - you can read more about that here.) This is not, logically, an issue, since Stay Sexy is kind of... A bubblegummy scent. Has some very sweet, tangy notes. The problem is, since it smelled so similar to a scent that I had not liked, because Daemon was not supposed to smell like that... I, by association, didn't like this.

The good news is, after a super long period of rest, it's gotten better.

It starts out bubblygummy still, but the grapefruit quickly comes out more and gives the scent a lovely bright and sour edge. The vanilla and honey still make it sweet and foody, but not cloyingly so, and the honey isn't overwhelming, which i'm so so thankful for - strong honey scents are, mm, unpleasant to me. Here, it just blends with the vanilla really well.

On the drydown, it becomes a smooth, creamy vanilla scent that I actually really like. It's sort of simple, but this would probably be nice to layer with things. Decent sillage - I could detect it faintly from a distance when it's wet. Disappears around the 4 hour mark.

RATING: 3.5/5. Objectively not bad smelling - in fact, i'd even say I like it - but it's simple in a way that doesn't quite interest me.

--

SHINY (PERFUME OIL) || Grapefruit, bergamot, white thyme, dalmation sage, black pepper.

IN THE BOTTLE: Kinda subdued herbs and something that smells dirty/earthy.

ON THE SKIN: He-eey, white thyme and black pepper, guess what this smells liiike :^)

Forreal though, when I first tried this, it had the same Oregano™ smell as Cersei, but after a good long while of rest, that's calmed down a little, though it still smells like some extremely buzzy herbs. There's also an undercurrent of citrus to it that I managed to pick up on a blind sniff, though I did have to be really concentrating to notice it.

On the drydown, hey, there's that subtle minty smell again! 90% sure it's the thyme after getting it in two different scents. Aaaand... Yep, stays that way for the next three hours, at which point it disappears. Basically? Cersei, but with some very faint citrus, and slightly less oregano-y. Maybe I just amp herbaceous smells real hard. Wears pretty close to the skin.

RATING: 2.5/5. Not wild about this one, but it gets half a point for having detectable citrus.

--

MARGAERY TYRELL (PERFUME OIL) || A freshly popped bottle of champagne; ripe, juicy peach; crisp cotton sheets; an English rose garden; moonlight pomegranate; herbaceous sage; neroli.

IN THE BOTTLE: Mmmm not good. Something very... It's weird, it's like acrid and chemical-y. Makes me think of the smell of bile, but cleaner.

ON THE SKIN: This was pretty when I first tried it. Sparkly champagne, a little soapy from the cotton sheets, a little peachy, ever-so-faintly floral... Bright, fizzy with a smooth undercurrent, and femme. I liked it a lot.

And then resting happened, and, what the hell?

I put it on, and it quickly went very, very bad on me. Like. I hate to use words like this to describe a scent, but it was acrid in a way that brings 'burning garbage' or 'vomit' to mind. I'm fairly certain it's a combination of the champagne, the sage, and maybe the peach - I've noticed some peach notes tend to go this kind of acrid on me in other scents, but it's more subtle than this. This is like... A perfect storm of bad. Which is unfortunate.

After five minutes, the sage note dries down, so it's better, but not great. In my notes, I called it 'slightly rancid champagne; champagne and piss'. After 30 minutes, it finally becomes something wearable: champagne and very faint peach, with a bit of laundry detergent... But it's also extremely light. I can barely smell it.

RATING: 1/5. The dry-down is okay, if not nearly nonexistent, but boy. Boy those first 30 minutes are hellish.

--

THE MOUNTAIN (EAU DE PARFUM) || Amber, a pint of oatmeal stout, pure golden honey.

IN THE BOTTLE: Hard to place. Almost smells like gingerbread - warm, sweet, and a little spicy, but it's kinda faint.

ON THE SKIN: I knew I would love this, and hey! What a surprise, I do. More than I even expected to, actually. The oatmeal stout note is killer: genuinely smells like warm, comforting, buttery oatmeal with brown sugar, cinnamon, and a little splash of booze. The honey's super subtle--hooray--but detectable, complimenting the oatmeal stout beautifully, giving it that honey tang.

And then it starts to dry down, and, oo la la, that amber. Resinously sweet, a little earthy, a little spicy. Gives this scent some complexity without losing the comforting foody notes from earlier.

This scent is rich, warm, a little creamy, and just... Tasty. I really, really like it. It wears strong on my wrist, but doesn't have a ton of sillage, and was still faintly detectable the morning after I put it on, so. Good longevity.

RATING: 5/5. The good stuff. Another top 3 scent from Suc.

--

And thats, woof, another part down. Next part should be the final one (unless I like, decide to divide it in half or something idk), and will feature: Nightshade; Sansa; Three-Eyed Raven; Papa's Waffles; Embalming Fluid; Bohemian; Briar Rose; Firefly; Troll Food; and Strawberry Milkshake.

...maybe I should divide that in half. Hm. We'll see.

[malodorousmalcontent]

Hexennacht Review

UPDATE 01/2021: I no longer support hexennacht on account of some events that transpired a few years ago and will be deleting my reviews of their scents. 

[malodorousmalcontent]

Sucreabeille Review Part 2

Hey everybody it's that time: the Sucreabeille reviewapalooza is upon us once again. A short explanation: near the beginning of February, Andrea, owner of Sucreabeille, offered me a coupon to explore and review some of her scents. I accepted, and through various circumstances, ended up placing three more orders and coming into ownership of a grand total of 32 33 of her house blends, aaaaall of which I plan to review. Since that's, y'know, a lot of smells, I decided to divide up my reviews into four parts.

This is part two. You can read part one here!

So, without further ado, here's my thoughts on Arsenic; Longest Night; Death Unicorn; Let's Be Bad Guys; Banshee; Here's The Thing: Fuck Everyone; Arya; and You're In A Cult, Call Your Dad.

ARSENIC || Antique lace, gasoline, old books, fresh vanilla bean.

IN THE BOTTLE: Like a strawberry jolly rancher!

ON THE SKIN: Honestly? Still like a strawberry jolly rancher: bright, sour-sweet, mouthwatering candy, though it is accompanied by the occasional whiff of sharp gasoline-like fumes. This is like a brighter, perkier take on genuine gasoline... And, truth be told, i'm not complaining. I really like the smell. It really puts the toxic in intoxicating.

...Get it

Be--because, it's. It's arseni--

Anyways

As it dries down, the vanilla comes out, and it's this bright, rich, foody vanilla that doesn't let this scent darken in the least. At no point do I get the lace or the old books, though, which was a bit of a disappointment: I was sitting there huffing my wrists, trying to convince myself that any smoothness in the scent was the antique lace, that I was catching a whiff of paper or the reserved scent of a hardback cover... But, nope. Toxic jolly rancher, then vanilla.

Lasts for 2-3 hours before it starts to fade.

RATING: 4/5. Docked a point because of the lack of an appearance of half the notes, but even without them, it's a really tasty scent.

--

LONGEST NIGHT || A big glass of merlot, cinnamon sticks, freshly grated nutmeg, cedarwood, pure honey, frankincense, myrrh, sweet sugar plums.

IN THE BOTTLE: Very faint spiced wine.

ON THE SKIN: This starts out with the merlot and nutmeg/cinnamon conbination at the very forefront, and under it is something that, in my notes, I listed as smelling like a baked good - but it's the combination of the spice with the honey note, i'm absolutely sure. Usually honey is too strong on me and ends up being kinda unpleasant, but it's reigned back here and is actually pretty nice. Underneath it all, real subtle-like, is the same bubblegum smell that Frozen Moon has in spades: the sugar plum. I think the perfume could do without it, but it's faint enough that it doesn't really affect the scent too much.

On the drydown, the spice and honey takes over as the dominant scent - a little disappointing, considering what I said earlier about not liking overpowering honey notes. The merlot is still there, but much lighter, and there's still just the faintest whiff of bubblegummy sugarplum, and... That's basically where it stays. I never get the cedarwood, frankincense, or myrrh.

RATING: 3/5. Doesn't smell bad, but not something i'm in love with, either.

--

DEATH UNICORN || Fresh cut lavender, black anise, sweet vanilla bean, black pepper crushed under a unicorn’s horn.

IN THE BOTTLE: Anise made sparkly from lavender.

ON THE SKIN: So, for the first, oh, five minutes, I can smell basically everything in this. The anise is at the forefront, gummy and earthy and licorice-y, and the lavender gives it this floral edge, the pepper makes the scent buzz, and... Without looking at the notes, i'm guessing there's vanilla?

*Checks notes*

Yup, dead-on! It's below everything else, but still notable.

Unfortunately, after those first five minutes, basically every note but the anise, amped up by the vanilla, is gone... And I don't like anise. Pure licorice smell. It had some alright sillage, could catch whiffs of it while just going about my regular business, and it was strong and clear on my wrist... But I can't report on longevity - I had to scrub it.

RATING: 2/5 - not only do I just not like the smell of the biggest note in this, but the fact that everything else faded so fast is a bit sad. Maybe I just amp anise?

--

LET'S BE BAD GUYS || Tobacco/vanilla, gunsmoke, leather, sandalwood.

IN THE BOTTLE: Bright, fresh, new leather.

ON THE SKIN: This one's similar-ish in notes to Khal Drogo, but definitely doesn't smell the same. While KD's leather note was old and worn and velvety, this one is bright, fresh, and new - without going car interior. I think it's the same leather note that this house uses in Belladonna, which almost smells like dark, inky rain to me. It's a really pretty note - if you're familiar with Alkemia's The Raven, it smells like that. The sandalwood is there underneath it, dry and dusty, but it's way more subdued than it is in KD - the leather is definitely the star of this scent.

The rest of the notes, I think, are really well-blended and are there to boost up the leather. The gunsmoke lends it a surprisingly clean smokiness without going BBQ or getting amped to hell, as smoke notes will sometimes do on me (lookin' at you, Alkemia's Smoke and Mirrors and Solstice Scent's Foxcroft). The tobacco/vanilla's there, but it's very subtle, and just gives that leather a tiny swirl of sweetness.

Has some decent sillage - I can just barely detect it from 6-7 inches away - and stays pretty strong and noticible on my skin for a good few hours.

RATING: 4.5/5. Really good leather scent that stays surprisingly clean for the notes it has. Unisex, almost leaning butch - it makes me feel like a badass leather-clad biker lady.

--

BANSHEE || Burnt sugar; baby powder; nag champa; real ylang ylang; a perfect sunflower; palmarosa; fresh figs; a moonlit night; decadent pomegranate; metallic copper; white musk.

IN THE BOTTLE: Baby powder mostly, perhaps with a tiny bit of the burnt sugar.

ON THE SKIN: Woof, it's burnt sugar and baby powder time!

The burnt sugar is the first thing I smell, and it's the same note from Cream Tea - though it's much more subtle in this, not headache-inducing. Sitting up there at the top with it is the baby powder, which... Look. I'm not super familiar with the smell of baby powder, but this certainly smells like the baby wipes we've got in our house: clean, with a weird slightly bitter aftersmell, and, of course, powdery. Really, really powdery.

This perfume has a lot of notes i'm not super familiar with, so I had to kind've keep my thoughts general on the smell of it. I get the burnt sugar, the baby powder, something kinda earthy-dank, and a floral edge that's sort'a perfumey, not sweet at all. The sweetest thing in this that I can even sort of detect is the fig, which, honestly, ain't that sweet.

When it dries down, the burnt sugar goes away, but the baby powder persists, and there's something giving it a... Almost wheaty, nutty smell? I'm thinking it might be the 'perfect sunflower' note, which might be closer to sunflower seeds. The metallic tang of the copper is also much stronger, gradually overtaking the scent. The floral edge is gone, and i'm still not picking up anything fruity. The last thing I smell is the clean, slightly soapy nature of the everlasting fricken' baby powder.

Starts out strong, but gets sorta light on my skin within two hours. The last thing I smell before it disappears is just a strangely clean scent. ...Prooobably that baby powder.

RATING: 1.7/5. I bought this because it was a weird scent, and, I mean, I got what I expected.

--

HERE'S THE THING: FUCK EVERYONE || Bourbon, rich chocolate, dark amber, touch of dirt.

IN THE BOTTLE: Chocolate! Imagine that.

ON THE SKIN: So, when I first tried this on before resting, this was chocolate for all of 20 minutes before turning into dirt, and then it just kinda stayed at 'dirt'. Bit of a disappointment. I'm happy to say that after almost two weeks of rest, it's gotten a lot better!

First off, it's staying sweeter for longer, which is great. It reminds me of Hexennacht's Evening Star - powdery chocolate amped up by amber - but, uh, obviously dirtier. There's a teensy bit of a boozy edge, but honestly, if I hadn't seen the word 'bourbon' in my previous notes, I don't think I would have noticed it. Underneath it all: very subtle, dry, dusty dirt - but like, clean dirt. Like if you smelled a handful of dirt that had nothing else in there but dirt. No minerals. No, idk, worm poop. Just dirt.

As it dries down, the dirt overtakes the Sweet Notes, so now it's dry, dusty dirt on top of... Honestly, i'm pretty sure it's the amber - i'm not getting a lot of the chocolate anymore, but the scent is still very rich and sweet in the way that sweet amber can be. The bourbon's come out more, too. Let this one rest, guys! Forreal!

Sillage of 2-3 inches, and it's not light on my skin - nice n clear n easy to find, even on the drydown.

RATING: 4/5. I'm not personally interested in smelling like chocolate - something I learned shortly after ordering this - but it's not a bad scent at all.

--

ARYA || Peaty oak moss, lemon verbena, frankincense, a double shot of good bourbon, smoky sandalwood.

IN THE BOTTLE: Strong, slightly green lemon.

ON THE SKIN: Unsurprisingly, I amp that lemon verbena to hell and back, as I do most lemon scents, and it just completely overtakes the entire scent. The most that I get out of this from the other notes is a vague, fresh green-ness, which I imagine is from the oakmoss... Or, heck, maybe it's just more of the lemon verbena, since that's, y'know, a plant. Geeze. I was hoping maybe i'd get the other notes on the dry-down, but... Nope. As soon as the lemon starts to fade, the entire scent goes with it.

At the very least, even though it's really one-note on me because lemon is a Cursed Scent with my skin chem, it's a very light, cool, refreshing lemon. Like sniffing a raw lemon with a cold stream nearby. It eventually just becomes the soft, pleasant smell of lightly lemon-scented hand soap.

I... Didn't take any notes on sillage or longevity, because, gosh, i'm so good at what I do. I do recall that I never really smelled it in the air, so, it wears close to the skin, at least.

RATING: 2.5/5. Well. It's a good lemon note. :( Just wish I could get anything else.

--

YOU'RE IN A CULT, CALL YOUR DAD || Flannel, sedona trees, bergamot tea, snickerdoodle cookies.

IN THE BOTTLE: Snickerdoodles and flannel. The snickerdoodles smell so fricken' good, this is another scent that made me go 'ooooh!' upon first whiff.

ON THE SKIN: Oh, golly gee, this is so frickin' good. My absolute, hand-to-god, favorite scent i've picked up from Suc. Period. Saving the best for last, here.

Starts out with those rich, bright, mouthwatering, buttery, sugary snickerdoodles - but they're not cloying even on their own, though they have the flannel to temper them back as well. And, oh, gosh, that flannel's so good. Nice, fresh, cozy-as-can-be flannel: the flannel of the pajamas you wear on Christmas morning, out in your isolated cabin surrounded by a sunny-but-snowy forest. That kinda cozy.

On the drydown, there's suddenly a small, slightly bitter green note, which I assume is the sedona trees, but mostly it's just smooth-but-tangy bergamot tea, the snickerdoodle sweetness still floating around it. This has good sillage both when wet and dry - I catch whiffs of it often - and it lasts for a good, long time - I'll wear it to work and still smell the tail-end of it 8 and a half hours later.

It reminds me a lot of Sixteen92's Shadow Show, which is another HG scent of mine - not because they smell very much alike, they honestly don't, but because they both give off very similar not-quite-gourmand vibes, which i'm in LOVE with. I could wax poetry about this scent. I could sing ballads about it. It's so good.

RATING: 7/5. Like. Go buy this! Right now!

--

So, that's part two! Two more parts to go. Next review's gonna be: Liquid Gold, Belladonna, Big Damn Heroes, Cersei, Stay Sexy, Shiny, Margaery, and one scent I haven't chosen 'cause it'll be coming in my next order.

[malodorousmalcontent]

Sucreabeille Review: Part 1

So, sometime near the beginning of February, Andrea of Sucreabeille read one of my reviews and liked it enough to approach me about reviewing some of her scents, offering a coupon to do just that! And, truth be told, i'd already been looking at the house - I had learned about it from Hexennacht - and had been wanting to place an order anyways. So, y'know, not gonna pass that bad boy up.

Through various circumstances, I ended up placing three different orders and coming into ownership of 22 different perfumes and one body oil. (And, since writing this, have placed ANOTHER order for 10 more samples. wooh!) Since that's, uhh, a lot, i'm gonna be dividing up the reviews into, mm, somewhere between three and five different parts. This is part one, where i'll be covering Cream Tea; Life Spark; Frozen Moon; Sea Glass; We Aim To Misbehave; Khal Drogo; Tyrion; and Brienne the Beauty.

FIRST, thoughts on actually ordering from Sucreabeille: Andrea is an absolutely delightful person. She was super gracious and very openly communicative - when there was a delay in the order due to Snowmageddon, I received an email explaining exactly when my order would go out and offering compensation for the delay... Which I honestly didn't think was even necessary, on account of how my order was ready to ship well before the TAT estimate on their website. Even with the delay, I believe my perfumes were all delivered basically right on time. She also threw in a bottle of her hair and body oil for free! (Which I fell head over heels in love with - we'll get into that later.) Really just a super pleasant experience.

The only complaint I have is, uh, the state it showed up in.

Upon opening the packages, I was immediately hit with a wave of Sweet Bubblygummy/Rubbery Scent and went, oh, gosh. Something leaked. I carefully started opening stuff up, and found everything but the samples wrapped in this damp, thin, gummy substance - undoubtedly something to KEEP stuff from leaking. I've since found out that it was partially melted parafilm, and, boy, it did not agree with my drams. And it smelled. Like... Filled the room, smelled. Could still smell it hours after I threw it all away... Smelled. I'm just glad it wasn't an actual perfume leak, because it was not a good smell, either.

...But, on that note, several of my sample vials did leak - at least five of them.

The next issue was the labels, which is really just parafilm issues part 2. The drams were a mess - the parafilm left them really slippery and absolutely destroyed the ink on the labels. I had to very, very carefully unwrap them, and very carefully put tape over the label, and very carefully wipe them clean. Not a single label came out unharmed - and one of the drams now has a blank label with the name written on it in gel pen. I'll also add that if any of the perfume oil gets on the labels, boom, that ink comes right up - my sample vials are pretty spotty, too, due to the leaks they had.

(A VERY IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: Andrea is well-aware of the leak issue and, at the time of me writing this, has already fixed it - the drams have new lids and the samples come in the fricken' cutest bottles imaginable. I wouldn't let this complaint deter anybody from ordering.

Also, when I mentioned in the Suc FB group having tested out all the scents I ordered, Andrea was really proactive in asking about the state my order had arrived in and was happy to replace the leaky samples. A+ customer service.

I'm... So absurdly excited to get those itty bitty bottles in my next order.)

And now on to the scents.

--

CREAM TEA (PERFUME OIL) | Hot chai tea, burnt sugar, white musk, warm milk, scones slathered with raspberry jam and honey.

(If y'all notice a discrepancy in the notes - these are the notes from the scent description, not the 'scent notes' part. I chose to use this since it was a bit more in-depth.)

IN THE BOTTLE: I get like... The tiniest hint of burnt sugar, but there's this cool sweetness underneath it that almost smells medicinal. Maybe that's the tea? Weird.

ON THE SKIN: I've had a hard time describing this one. I wrote my initial notes - and then ended up not going off them at all while writing the actual review. And after I wrote the review, I wasn't happy with it, so I re-wrote it. And now i'm rewriting it again. So... Let's see if I can get it this time.

The first note I get is, most definitely, the burnt sugar. It was the first note I got when I tried it on straight out of the mail, too - and, at the time, it was so overpowering I could hardly smell anything else. Was downright acrid. After over a week of rest, it's mellowed some, but is still largely at the forefront, nutty and charred and a little bitter. Underneath it, I get a general kind of foody sugary sweetness, where it's harder to say what it is - the scones? The honey? The chai tea? - but I DEFINITELY can detect the raspberry jam. Saying it like that makes it sound like it's a Big Note--the jam isn't overwhelming, it just gives the scent a kind of fruity, bright, slightly tart edge.

After about 10 minutes, I can smell the musk: humid and slightly sharp, as white musk tends to be on me. There's a creaminess to the whole scent from the milk note, and I definitely get some foody spices... But I couldn't pick out anything that particularly reads 'tea' to me, y'know. Dries down to, basically, softly-sweet scone and a hint of that nutty burnt sugar.

This has some good sillage when wet - could smell it from at least a foot away - but wears closer to the skin on the drydown.

RATING: 3/5. It's not bad, but even after mellowing out that burnt sugar still makes it sorta acrid and gives me a headache.

--

LIFE SPARK (PERFUME OIL) | An enormous blizzard on a cold winter’s night, a fireworks explosion.

IN THE BOTTLE: A cool, fresh, slightly floral scent. Honestly? Think air freshener.

ON THE SKIN: So, I tried this one on early-on, and that's when the notes were truest. The 'fireworks explosion' honestly reminded me of the smell of a burning sparkler: fuzzy, maybe a little sulfuric, has a metallic tang to it. The 'enormous blizzard'... Well, truth be told, I didn't really get much cold atmosphere from this. Mostly those notes were just kinda perfumey. But! Burning sparkler. Good stuff.

After resting, it's actually lost that metallic tang, and from the get-go, just sorta smells like a nice, smooth, slightly floral conditioner with a soft, wet sweetness. That's basically the long and short of it: nice soap.

Smells pretty strong and clear on my wrist, with a sillage of at least a couple inches.

RATING: 3/5. I don't care for soapy scents, but as far as they go, this is at least a pretty one.

--

FROZEN MOON (PERFUME OIL) | Crisp winter evening air, frost, sweet sugar plum, delicious marshmallow.

IN THE BOTTLE: Bubblegum.

ON THE SKIN: Hey guess what! It smells like bubblegum!

In all seriousness, though: this started off bubblegummy and ended bubblegummy. The plum and marshmallow just combine to make the perfect pink bubblegum, with the plum maybe lending it the teensiest bit of tartness. The cold air/frost notes didn't feel particularly cold for the first hour of wear, and then, finally, a tiny bit of refreshing coolness begins to peek through.

On the drydown, the scent goes from a fuzzy bubblegum to a strong, crystal clear, juicy bubblegum. But, y'know. Still bubblegum. It's evidently got some strong sillage - my roommate could smell it from feet away, and said that it smelled like 'a baby. Like how a baby always smells sweet, because they're covered in sweet'. Their words, not mine.

RATING: 2.5/5. Too youthful for me, but someone, somewhere, wants to smell like a baby, covered in sweet.

--

SEA GLASS (PERFUME OIL) | Juicy mango, ripe yuzu, whipped coconut cream, sea moss, pure honey from the comb, Tahitian vanilla, salty spray.

IN THE BOTTLE: Fruuuuity. Definitely getting that mango and the coconut cream.

ON THE SKIN: So. Starts out with smooth mango and sharp pinpricks of the yuzu's tartness at the very top, making it a real tropical-smelling scent, with a bed of the coconut cream underneath it, lending it a very tasty, slightly rich sweetness. The sea moss and salt are ever-present, giving the scent a tinge of ocean-smell. After about an hour and a half of wear, the fruit and coconut cream fades and the vanilla comes out, and it's a bright and perky vanilla, not the smooth n mellow vanilla. While I can't say i'm getting anything that makes me go, 'oh, that's honey', it's probably amping up the vanilla. Salt's still there, too - makes my mouth water and my nose tingle, gives the scent a sparkle. I would say the whole scent's kinda stylized - this is another scent that reminds me of shampoo or conditioner without necessarily smelling soapy, like a tropical themed shampoo.

Wears close the skin, and by the time the vanilla (and honey?) comes out, it's sorta faint. Honestly, I tried this one on 3-4 times since I got it - including while writing this review - and each time it's been hard for me to pick up. I get particularly nose-blind to this bad boy.

RATING: 3.7/5. It's pretty and refreshing. Just wish it didn't fade so fast.

--

WE AIM TO MISBEHAVE (PERFUME OIL) | Rosemary, Vanilla, Amber, Honey.

IN THE BOTTLE: A lot of surprisingly medicinal yet smooth herbiness.

ON THE SKIN: Starts out smelling like Weird Rosemary - i'm almost certain that's due to the rosemary and the amber note combining, and i'm pretty sure it's a dry amber, not a sweet one. The Weird Rosemary smell is strong, smooth, a little earthy, with a tingle of herbaceous green-ness, and... I mean, it's weird. It smells like a rosemary doppelganger that can't quite get the features right - and I love the smell of Real Rosemary, I cook with it all the time, so I sure as heckie know what it smells like. Also, like... For notes of vanilla and honey, this scent starts out with virtually no detectable sweetness.

As it dries down, it gets better. The rosemary becomes more realistic, but also gets more subtle, and the vanilla comes pouring out, smooth and mellow and not particularly foody. The scent takes on a fuzzy, soft sweetness. It's actually really pretty. Usually vanilla like this--the kinda smoother, waxier, less foody vanilla--makes me feel a bit sick, but combined with the rosemary, it's pretty nice - the herby edge helps balance it a lot. The honey finally comes out far into the drydown, and it's not particularly strong, just gives a small brightness to the scent.

This wears pretty dang close to my skin, and within an hour, it's very light, bordering on 'have-to-really-search-for-it'.

RATING: 4/5. Not wild about how it starts, but it dries down so prettily. Once again, if only it weren't so dang light on me. :T

--

KHAL DROGO (HAIR & BODY OIL) | Supple leather, smoky sandalwood.

IN THE BOTTLE: Light, new leather and very subtle sandalwood.

ON THE SKIN: Boy this takes on a whole new life once I rub it in. I never would've ordered it based on the notes alone (I like both sandalwood and leather, but was worried it'd be too masculine for me), but i'm so so glad it got thrown in.

The leather smells like that light brown, velvety, super soft, super worn, kinda unfinished leather, sitting on top of dry, dusty sandalwood - in the best way. I slather this all over my hands, cup said hands over my mouth, close my eyes, and just breathe in - and suddenly i'm in one of those shops where they sell handcrafted leatherworks and handcarved wooden figurines. You know the ones - the ones with two employees total and it's a guy in his 60's-70's and his wife. Got dreamcatchers and nature paintings everywhere. It's intensely nostalgic, and so spot-on, and... Wow. A+. So cozy and comforting, and those notes ring so true and clear. Amazing scent.

As for the actual hair and body oil - it's very light, which i'm appreciative of, though it does take a LOT of it to get my thirsty thirsty hands to feel moisturized. Doesn't feel greasy and sinks in very quickly, so no sensory issues. I have hair that even the slightest amount of oil leaves lookin Nasty, but if I put some on before bed and wash it out the next day, it leaves my ends feelin' nice and soft - and the scent in it is pretty strong. Lasted through the night, still faintly detectable on my hands when I woke up the next morning, could smell a cloud of it waft up when I got in the shower.

RATING: 6/5. Maybe i'm biased due to Nostalgia, but dang, what a beautiful scent. Changed my mind about simple blends.

--

TYRION (PERFUME OIL) | Tahitian vanilla, juicy fig, freshly tanned leather.

IN THE BOTTLE: Suuuuper duper green fig, and that's basically it.

ON THE SKIN: This was the first scent that I got from Suc that I took a whiff of and audibly went 'ooooh!' because I liked it so much - I don't own anything else that smells like this. (That's probably because this is my first fig perfume, but I digress.)

The fig is really, really green - wet, juicy, humid green-ness. If someone made me sniff it and asked me what it was blind, i'd probably guess some super heady freshly-cut grass. The leather is just behind it, and is absolutely delectable: it smells like if you walked into a barn and stuck your face against a horse and just breeeeathed it in. They aren't kidding when they call that leather 'fresh'.

The scent reminds me of something that I had a little bit of trouble placing, but: you ever been on those tours of like, settlements from the 1600's? Historic cabins where you could see how people in The Colonies lived? This smells like those tours, if that makes sense. Like the inside of those cabins. Rustic, animalic, outdoorsy. It's great.

It dries down to the vanilla that, genuinely, smells like soft vanilla bean ice cream. The green of the fig is still there, but it's cool and refreshing and goes so well with the vanilla. Absolutely lovely.

RATING: 5/5.

--

BRIENNE THE BEAUTY (PERFUME OIL) | Newly cut grass on a hot summer day; smoky white musk; sweet Meyer lemon; real ginger; white tea; a fresh-picked Valencia orange.

IN THE BOTTLE: Smells like fresh, faint lemonade with a hint of ginger.

ON THE SKIN: I put this on and the first thing I smell is ginger, for like, a heartbeat. Like I just sniffed the ginger on a plate of sushi, ginger, and then from there: lemon. Honestly, I think I amp lemon. I've never worn a scent with a lemon note where it hasn't taken over, and this one's no different.

The lemon mellows out after a bit, and the scent basically becomes citrusy tea - more orange than lemon, but the lemon's sour flavor is definitely there. And... That's it. I don't pick up the musk, and not once in the three times i've tried this on have I smelled the grass, and the ginger was there for all of .5 seconds. It's nice, but doesn't really get the fire goin' in me.

RATING: 3/5. Doesn't smell bad, but i'm not interested in smellin like an orange-lemon, n' I wish the other notes showed up more.

--

Stay tuned for when I post up part 2 in the next week or two, featuring Arsenic; Longest Night; Death Unicorn; Banshee; You're in a Cult, Call Your Dad; Let's Be Bad Guys; Arya; and Here's the Thing: Fuck Everyone.

[malodorousmalcontent]

Strange Fire & Fumery Review

So I found out about Strange Fire & Fumery through Hexennacht - honestly, at this point, that seems to be the way i'm finding out about a lot of perfume houses. Since I looove places that offer dram sample packs, and their scents sounded pleasant and I was curious, I went ahead and placed an order for Rook, Black Goat, Existential Dread, Black Mass, and Witch Wife. (Additionally, 505 from a second order.)

First impressions of the brand: TAT took longer than it said on the site but honestly it was completely understandable - I found out via posts on their FB page that the owner, Jinx, was delaying orders due to the ridiculously cold weather. Seems responsible to me. I corresponded with him a couple times after finding out about the house - some of it about my order, some of it not - and he was pleasant and responded quickly.

When the perfumes arrived they were packaged nice and securely and the order came with a really attractive matte sticker of their Death's Head Moth. I usually don't go for stickers - and if a sticker has the company's name on it really obviously, I won't use it, no matter what, just a weird brain thing I have - but this was literally just the moth, the sticker cut to the shape of it, with a tiny lil 'IG @ Strange Fire and Fumery' written almost imperceptibly under one wing. I liked it so much it became the first sticker to grace my laptop. Congrats, sticker.

No leaks or anything. Really, the only complaint I have is that the ink from the labels comes off a tiny bit on my fingers, and it doesn't seem to stain them or anything if I just rub it off.

(Additionally, when I placed my second order, it shipped out like a couple days later, so, yay accurate TATs.)

Anyways, on to the perfumes.

--

ROOK (PERFUME OIL) | Wet leaves, musky black feathers, slow vetiver, a stiff branch, the slow death-creep of Autumn, a fussy Underworld messenger.

IN THE BOTTLE: Kind of just smells like your standard piney-cold floral.

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): So, this was the first of the SF&F perfumes I tried on, and my immediate thought was, oh, smells like incense! But not in the literal incense-note way - in the, 'I could see this in stick form being burnt as incense' way. Go figure, coming from a house that's known for its incense.

No, this is mostly floral, and refreshingly cold, a little sharp, a hint soapy. Makes me think of crisp black flowers blooming in spite of the snow surrounding it. Smells colder than the notes would let on. As it dries down, there's a hint of this resinous sweetness, and then this warm woody scent. I actually like it quite a bit - most woody notes smell a bit too dirty for me, but this is like... A clean, cozy wood.

AFTER RESTING: So uhhh, when I put this one back on, it went through such a change that it got three 'holy shit's from me in my notes. I'm just gonna copy-paste what I got there!

Starts off the same as before: refreshing, semi-soapy, chilly, piney florals, just smooth enough that they don't give me a headache, very pretty - and I say that as someone who isn't wild for most floral-forward scents. Within an hour, the musk of the feathers comes out - cozy and lightly animalic, makes the floral smell silky - and then. Holy shit, I don't know, this scent just becomes a dead ringer for its notes. Boom.

The wet leaves are suddenly at the forefront, holy shit where did they come from, and they smell like real wet leaves - albeit, with a more resinous sweetness, but like, I can smell that wetness and that hint of green, earthy bitterness. It still has those kind of cold air notes, but it definitely smells more like autumn air than winter now, less 'snow' and more 'cold and damp from rain'. The musk is still detectable, but blends in really well with everything else - just lends that soft silkiness. And, of course, there's still the faintest hint of floral, making this whole thing Pretty. I can detect a bit of wood just before it fades... But it's barely there. Holy shit, this scent is a wizard's magic. I haven't experience a morph quite like this in anything before.

RATING: 4/5. Cool as heck, but docked half a point because it takes so long to morph into the proper atmospheric smell, and another half-point because it only lasted a few hours on me. At least the initial scent's pretty nice, though.

--

BLACK GOAT (PERFUME OIL) | Black oak, black amber, musk.

IN THE BOTTLE: Sweetness tempered by wood. Go figure!

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): Resiny, incensey, warm sweetness--and then that amber really blooms, heady and rich and like... Not necessarily chocolatey, but I could see how someone might mistake it for that. Almost fruity? Apple-y? But again, not quite. Also, a little bit creamy/waxy. It's all really well balanced. It's a really fascinating accord, and I can't stop sniffin' it.

The oak comes out on the dry-down, smooth and dark. I can't say I pick up the musk. This also fades really quickly on me - it was gone within two hours.

AFTER RESTING: The notes are more combined immediately out of the gate now. While that lovely amber is still at the forefront ( :) ), the oak is sitting just behind it, making it a touch more subdued ( :( ). It's really gorgeous... But man, I wish I could just drown myself in the black amber note, so i'm a little sad it's not as rich.

Personal biases aside, I don't detect the musk at all 'til the drydown, and then, if I REALLY huff at it, I get this soft, cozy, animalic scent. The rest of the drydown is a gentle resiny swirl of the amber, the richest parts of it faded away, and then just pure, cold oak. God this is pretty.

This lasts a lot longer, now. 4 hours in and it was down to the single-note oak, and by the time I left work - 8 hours - I could still just barely detect it on my wrist.

RATING: 5/5. Tied with 505 (we'll get to that one) as my favorite scent i've gotten from this house.

--

EXISTENTIAL DREAD (PERFUME OIL) | You wouldn't believe me if I told you.

IN THE BOTTLE: Some kind of white flower. It's a little green, and smells really familiar, but I couldn't tell you why.

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): God, i'm reading my notes on this and just looking through the mental gymnastics I went through to describe this one. It was very, very light on me for the first hour - almost imperceptible. Definitely a white floral, but so empty and light that it's more like the essence of it rather than a full-on floral. Also had this kinda waxy quality to it - comparable to unscented candle wax. A direct quote from my notes: "I feel like this is what The Void smells like."

AFTER RESTING: Unscented dial soap bar. Like. That's the long and short of it. My roommate says it smells like old, 'traditional' perfume, so I keep sniffing my wrist and seeing if I get anything other than dial soap... And, nope, still smells like unscented dial soap bar! Maybe the two scents are just extremely alike to me. That's white florals for ya.

As it wears on... Now it's dial soap with throw. I'm only half kidding. Technically I could call this a smooth, light, creamy, completely unsweet white floral, perhaps with something darker underneath it, giving it a hint of bitterness. I'm not gonna call it that.

I'm gonna call it unscented. dial. soap bar.

(source: went and sniffed a bar of antibacterial dial soap. can confirm: same smell, just stronger and a little more flowery.)

RATING: 2/5. Not a big fan of smelling like straight soap.

--

BLACK MASS (PERFUME OIL) | Woody frankincense, heady myrrh, red wine.

IN THE BOTTLE: Fruit juice!

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): Beautiful, but kind of simple - it's mostly the wine, but it doesn't have an alcoholic edge to it, so it's just a rich fruit juice smell. The frankincense and myrrh come out more as it wears down, giving it a bit of a zing. I really like this.

AFTER RESTING: About the same, honestly. A dark, smooth, juicy fruit scent at first, but I couldn't tell you what fruit in particular - just smells ripe and like you could bite into it and have juices running down your chin. No boozy edge. Within ten minutes the frankincense comes out and makes my nose tingle just a bit, gives the whole scent a more... Well. Incensey feel. Sort of replaces the juiciness of the scent. Incense usually falls flat on me - I never get a spiciness out of it, it sorta just smells like flat soda - so it's really nice to be getting a bit of a kick out of this. I'm also definitely getting a hint of earthiness from the myrrh. Really nicely balanced, feels a little witchy.

Wears close to the skin, but has decent longevity - I fell asleep with it going strong on my wrist. It was gone when I woke up in the morning, though.

RATING: 4/5. Not the most exciting scent, but really nice. Good stuff.

--

WITCH WIFE (PERFUME OIL) | Pine trees that scrape the sky, rich sandalwood, teak, an old cottage, a trail of forget-me-nots to find your way home.

IN THE BOTTLE: A very strong floral scent.

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): All chilly pine and light blue florals with a bit of an edge to them. Eventually both these notes kind of fade, giving way to a woodiness and a... Kind of juicy, citrus note? I'm not quite sure what that is.

AFTER RESTING: Woof, a lot stronger, and those florals aren't just powdery - they are downright chalky for the first long while. The combination of the pine, forget-me-nots, and something that's giving it a bitter note actually reminds me at first of the lavender fabuloso I used to mop with... But as it wears on, the florals get this humid headiness to them that, honestly, smells like ammonia. I went and sprayed a paper towel with some windex to compare. It's not exactly the same... But definitely similar. Big cleaning supply mood.

Lasted a small handful of hours, eventually drying down to faint, soft florals and a subdued woody background. The cleaning-supply phase also wasn't screechy or unwearable... But i'd call it tolerable at best.

RATING: 2.5/5.

--

505 (PERFUME OIL) | Brown sugar pastries fresh-baked in Parisian storefronts. Dreamy lavender and black amber for a heady, surreal quality and the white mulberries of Paris.

IN THE BOTTLE: Mouthwatering brown sugar and sparkly lavender.

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): Oh, wow, this smells good. I was worried the lavender would be overpowering because as of late, lavender hasn't been agreeing with me - makes me feel a little sick - but no, it's really light and subtle, just lending the whole scent a sort of cool floral smoothness. That to-die-for black amber note and the sharp hint of foody brown sugar balances it out really nicely. At the base, the mulberries give it this rich, dark juiciness. Super tasty smell. My only complaint is that it's very light right now.

AFTER RESTING: Well, it's not light anymore! But not necessarily overpowering or cloying, either. Otherwise, it's basically the same: sharp, delicious brown sugar; dark, juicy mulberries; and a hint of well-blended lavender giving it that cool floral touch, not at all powdery or gross. I can't detect the amber as obviously - i'd say it's just sorta amping everything else up. Very rich. I looove this.

(Notably, I can't suggest using this as a sleep scent - it's just too bright for it. I tried to wear it to bed and ended up waking up at some ungodly hour of the morning in a cloud of it, with it all over my huggin' pillow. Made me kinda nauseous, certainly did not sleep well.)

Wears close to the skin - I can only smell it when my nose is a few inches out from my wrist. Starts to smell fade after a couple hours.

RATING: 5/5. The aforementioned other-favorite-scent.

[malodorousmalcontent]

HEXENNACHT REVIEW

UPDATE 01/2021: I no longer support hexennacht on account of some events that transpired a few years ago and will be deleting my reviews of their scents.

[malodorousmalcontent]

HEXENNACHT REVIEW

UPDATE 01/2021: I no longer support hexennacht on account of some events that transpired a few years ago and will be deleting my reviews of their scents.

[malodorousmalcontent]

COLORNOISE REVIEW

So Colornoise came to my attention after the, like, one review on reddit where they went over Classical and Bassoon. I took a look at the site, saw some scents I liked, and was like, for $10 for a 10ml spritzer? Why the heck not?

(They've since gone up to like $15-16 a bottle. Understandably.)

So, I picked up Matcha Latte because how can I resist a perfume that looks like something I want to drink, and in the order I got a sample of Bronze.

First impressions: These perfumes shipped out super fast, and the packaging is ultra cute - some of the nicest indie packaging i've seen! The sample vials are also shaped slightly differently than most - they're only mildly easier to open than others, but they are EXTREMELY easy to close. They're also... Real cute. No spills, everything securely packaged. Even the package envelope they sent it in was fancy and holographic, fitting with the brand. No complaints here.

The one thing i'm confused about is that these are perfume oils using a fractionated coconut oil base, but they're in spritzer bottles? I'm fairly new on the indie scene, but to my understanding, this is something places tend to avoid? Regardless, i've had no trouble spraying it thus far.

Anyways, here we go~

--

MATCHA LATTE (PERFUME OIL)

NOTES: Fresh matcha powder, sweetened cream, green tea leaves, tea with friends

IN THE BOTTLE: Honestly it's hard to sniff this in the bottle since it's, y'know, a spritzer. From the faint whiff I can get, I smell very light, slightly creamy green tea.

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): For the most part, this is just green tea leaves. Doesn't go creamy, the matcha is only a little detectable. It's a bit soapy in the way that actual green tea is, and a hint zingy, almost citrusy. It basically stayed like this throughout my whole wear - herbal, clear green tea.

AFTER RESTING: As soon as it hits my skin, I immediately get an herbiness verging on soapiness, but within a couple minutes it's easily identifiable as the green tea leaves and loses that soapy-threatening edge. Over the next hour or so, the sweet cream comes out! Hooray! But I wouldn't call it too sweet, just enough to balance out the herbal tones of the tea leaves. The matcha gives it a bit of powderiness, too, and I just faintly pick up that signature matcha scent. Ultimately, this smells... Maybe not like a matcha latte - there's nothing remotely coffee-ish about this, of course - but a really nice, semi-sweet, creamy green tea. Super lovely, very realistic.

This is really, really light though. I can only lightly smell it with my nose against my wrist - it's just strong enough that I don't necessarily have to go searching for it. The night I tested this, I literally put it on because I needed something light, refreshing, and not too sweet - and it absolutely did the trick.

RATING: 4.5/5. This is super nice - really, the only issue with it is that it's just a bit too faint.

--

BRONZE (PERFUME OIL)

NOTES: Bronzed embers, warm patchouli, cedarwood spice.

IN THE BOTTLE: Interesting! Bright, sparkly, a little bit warm.

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): Wow this might be the first patchouli scent I like. This is warm and pretty, the spices are tingly and absolutely lovely and compliment the very subtle wood notes really well. It's definitely a very stylized perfume, but it fits the color bronze to a T. For its notes, it's not a particularly dark or dirty scent - i'd actually qualify this as pretty sweet and clean. It smells like red goldstone looks. I like this a lot.

After wearing this for a few hours - it dries down and smells exactly like a very slightly citrusy southern sweet tea. It's delicious.

AFTER RESTING: This doesn't dry down to a picture-perfect lightly citrusy sweet tea anymore, which makes me sad. :(

That being said, it's not a bad scent or anything, and honestly matches the notes a little more closely. It's a warm and lightly spiced scent - my roommate said it smelled like cinnamon, which I can definitely see - with a woodiness sitting under it from the patchouli and cedarwood. Those Apparent Woody-Earthy Notes are stronger on the drydown and make this a little bit dirtier than before, but i'd still call this pretty clean and refreshing. It's also still got a hint of that citrusy tang, but like, it's way way way in the background, just kinda accenting anything else: what i'm sayin' is, if you're like 'ooo a citrus scent, imma buy that!' this is not a citrusy scent.

Re: the cinnamon, it's a little subdued and candy-like, but I wouldn't say it goes Red Hots on me. (because Red Hot smell makes me kinda ill, and this does not.)

At the time of writing this, i've been wearing it just over four hours and all i'm picking up is the faintest hints of a warm, fuzzy, subtle sweetness.

RATING: 4/5. This is a really nice scent that if you're fond of warmth and wood notes is gonna suit you well! Unfortunately that's not quite my bag, so I don't think i'll be reaching for this a ton, but even so I can safely say that I do like this.

[malodorousmalcontent]

HEXENNACHT REVIEW

UPDATE 01/2021: I no longer support hexennacht on account of some events that transpired a few years ago and will be deleting my reviews of their scents.

[malodorousmalcontent]

THE STRANGE SOUTH REVIEW

Got my sample order from The Strange South! Reviewing Harbinger in White; Banshee’s Holler; Damn, It’s Dark Down Here; Blood on the Moon; Hysteria; Nightjar; and Deerskin.

HARBINGER IN WHITE (PERFUME OIL)

NOTES: Black roses, black patchouli, and black feathers under a fresh layer of snow.

IN THE BOTTLE: Powdery roses. Not really much else. This actually reminds me a lot of what Sixteen92's Southern Gothic smells like - it's got that TUMS-y scent to it.

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): Pretty much what it smells like in the bottle at first - TUMS-y roses. I kept checking the notes between it and Southern Gothic, trynna figure out what might be causing that scent, but they don't... Share any notes, from what I can see. I can only figure it's just something with the florals. The TUMS-iness is a little more subtle in this, though, so I didn't scrub it, and after a couple hours it became more of a smooth floral. I still didn't really pick up on any of the other notes.

AFTER RESTING: Wow, a couple days of rest did this an absolutely MASSIVE favor. It's not powdery anymore, not TUMS-y, and is actually very nice. It's kinda light (disclaimer, this may just be my bad sniffer), but I think i'm picking up on the patchouli too--it's very subtle, though, and mostly grounds the roses--and even the black feathers, which smell kinda... Dark and clean? I'm not sure how else to describe them. Not getting much in the way of snow, though.

I like this more than I did before by a longshot, but when it comes down to it, it's still just a pleasant floral.

It stays pretty close to the skin - I can smell it from an inch or so away at most. It's not light or lacking, though.

RATING: 3/5. If you like roses, this is a nice rose floral. Not quite for me, but I can't deny it's a good scent.

--

BANSHEE'S HOLLER (PERFUME OIL)

NOTES: Moonflower, wilted carnations, white musk, birch bark, and decaying leaves.

IN THE BOTTLE: STANKY. Like, there are a few scents that I sniff that are SO offputting i'm not sure i'm even gonna put them on, and this was one of them - maybe because I just didn't expect it to smell the way it did. On a second whiff a few hours later, i'd say it smells like a dusty, old, wooden room.

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): This stayed STANKY on me for a couple minutes, but eventually became something much prettier - one of those airy, atmospheric scents that I can only think to describe as empty. The main notes I detect are the florals with the bark and leaves grounding it, and they combine in a really lovely way. The mental image it gives me is a living room in an abandoned cabin that's half fallen in on itself, exposing the night sky above, overgrown with white flowers that glow a little in the moonlight. It's actually kinda elegant, with a dark side of dirty.

AFTER RESTING: The bitterness of the decaying leaves and the woodiness of the birch is honestly so strong that I was kinda dreading trying this one again, it gives me a headache to sniff out of the bottle, but once it got on my skin, all that bitterness went away leaving mostly these dark, spooky florals with a hint of woodiness to ground it. It gets a weird freshness/mintiness that's cool on my nose the farther away I try to smell it. The moonflower gives it a sort of 'stereotypical perfume' scent that's rounded out by the carnations. I wouldn't say this has changed too much from Immediate Application. Dark, ethereal, and elegant. Smells like something i'd wear to a funeral.

I can smell it from about three inches away from my wrist.

RATING: 3/5. It's a nice, conceptual scent with some depth to it, but just isn't really my bag.

--

DAMN, IT'S DARK DOWN HERE (PERFUME OIL)

NOTES: Jasmine, vetiver, clary sage, damp soil, and coffin wood.

IN THE BOTTLE: Light and mostly floral. I think this was the first bottle I opened, and I told my roommate, who really enjoys Alkemia's Midnight Garden (straight florals), that they'd probably like this.

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): Honestly i've been sitting here sniffing this periodically for a couple hours and i would'a sworn up and down this had honeysuckle in it, because that's the main thing I detect. Maybe it's a mix of the jasmine and the clary sage? I rarely actually smell jasmine in things, and have no idea what clary sage smells like?? Either way, it's also got some woodiness to it that darkens the scent. It's REAL light, so it's hard to say. tl;dr: light, slightly green floral with some woodiness underneath it.

AFTER RESTING: Again, I would swear up and down that this has honeysuckle in it and time and time again I am surprised it doesn't. That being said, this honestly... Doesn't smell bad, but it's really plain to me. It smells like a nice soap from a fancy hotel. I can't really pick out any particular notes - just soft clean smooth floral, all one-note. This doesn't smell exactly like jasmine, so I assume it's being rounded out by either the vetiver and/or the clary sage. I definitely don't get dirt or wood.

Gotta have my nose against my wrist for this one.

RATING: 2/5. Smells nice, but kinda boring - I like stuff with a little more depth to it.

--

BLOOD ON THE MOON (PERFUME OIL)

NOTES: Pine needles, frozen leaves, frankincense, crystallized honey (vegan), blood, and patchouli.

IN THE BOTTLE: A cold, dirty forest. A bitter scent, but not in a bad way.

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): Still that bitter, dirty forest, but with... More? I'm not really getting the honey, but I can detect a little bit of the frankincense, and i'm guessing the dirty bitterness is a mix of the frozen leaves and patchouli. I'm not really getting anything that reads blood to me. The pine is really realistic, smooth and not at all minty/'christmassy'. As it is, this smells like a strange mix of clean and dirty: it's airy and empty, but that dark earth is only as far away as a glance downwards.

AFTER RESTING: Another one resting for a couple days significantly changed. This was a lot more bitter and dirty before--and, for the first few minutes, this stays bitter and dirty, then smooths out, the frozen leaf note heading to the back of the pack and leaving a smooth pine. After a few minutes, a waxy sweetness comes out that I can only assume is the honey, and a... Man, I recently was given a straight package of frankincense so I know what it smells like, but I have no idea how to DESCRIBE that smell. It's like a little incensey zing? It's there, accenting the honey. Sitting underneath it all is a very soft but decidedly coppery tang from the blood. If you really huff this in, you can still get the dirtiness of the frozen leaves note.

Despite the honey being one of the three big players, I would NOT call this a sweet scent - the sweetness is very subdued and realistic. I like this a lot more than I did, it's very pretty.

This is a lot lighter than when I first put it on - i'm not really smelling it unless my nose is up in there.

RATING: 5/5. This is really pretty! I don't know if i'd fullsize this or not, kinda waffling on that, but it's objectively really nice. I keep sniffin it.

-- HYSTERIA (PERFUME OIL)

NOTES: Blue wisteria, white jasmine, rock rose, crisp cucumber, and aldehydes.

IN THE BOTTLE: Very light, with this little squiggle of something sharp that tickles my nose.

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): OHHH BOY THAT'S SHARP. Is it the wisteria? The jasmine? The aldehydes? I don't know, maybe it's all three! (Probably the aldehydes. I didn't have trouble with them in Alkemia's Foxfire, but...) But this is like if you had a nice cool pool of water and just dunked a cleaning supply bath bomb in it.  It's sharp, sour, chemically, and puts a bright, highlighter, neon yellow-green color in my head. I should've expected this from the name, it honestly fits it well, but holy crap. Wow this gives me a headache. Scrubbing this.

AFTER RESTING: Oh man this... Still reeks. It's just NOT good. I smell like a rave looks. I smell like a highlighter. Once again, scrubbing this bad boy post-haste.

Small update from like 20 minutes later: Seriously. It STINKS. It's bad.

I caught ONE whiff of it while sitting normally, which is too much for me. Otherwise I can only smell it a few inches from my wrist.

RATING: 0/5. Nope. Nope nope nope. This is a Bad.

UPDATE: After I first published this review on reddit, I had a lot of people saying they didn’t get this experience out of this perfume at all. To make sure I wasn’t vividly hallucinating the whole thing, I put it back on for a couple hours. Eventually, the chemical edge to it went away... But ultimately it left the screechiest jasmine cat pee smell imaginable. Still real bad on me.

-- NIGHTJAR (PERFUME OIL)

NOTES: Peach blossom, honeysuckle, sage, fern, tuberose, dragon's blood, clove, and smoked vanilla.

IN THE BOTTLE: Hubba bubba bubblegum, of all things.

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): So, I put this on, and my first notion was like, that's weirdly sweet-medicinal, but within seconds it was back to hubba bubba bubblegum, and, honestly, I kinda like it. It's nice and smooth and comforting. The clove gives a little bit of a kick to it. If I really breathe it in, then I would say it's a nice, smooth, pretty fruity-floral, well blended, with a bit of depth/spice from the dragon's blood and smoked vanilla. There's something that gives me a really smooth, comforting honey vibe? And a waxy vibe, like makeup? Not sure what exactly is doing that. ...but, tl;dr, hubba bubba bubblegum. I'd wear this to bed.

AFTER RESTING: Two days of resting, and this... Still smells like hubba bubba! The honeysuckle's pretty noticeable in this, though, which I like. Nothing else particularly notable going on here for me, though.

Wears v close to the skin. I don't detect it at all until i'm an inch away from the source.

RATING: 3/5. It's not bad, but nothing particularly special imho. Wears a little too close to the skin for my liking, too.

-- DEERSKIN (PERFUME OIL)

NOTES: Warm straw, painted corn, antler velvet, juniper, and musk.

IN THE BOTTLE: This smells so warm and comforting in the bottle. Soft and musky and cozy. I got this one as a free sample, and was surprised when it was the scent I was most interested in just from the bottle smell.

IMMEDIATE APPLICATION (BECAUSE I AM A GOON): This keeps that warm muskiness from the bottle, but there's something else that's like... Sour, in this? I figure it might be the juniper, but it's a very strange, familiar, animalic sourness - I don't know how to describe it or why i'm recognizing it. I really don't care for it though. Otherwise, this is a warm, cozy scent that's neither dirty nor clean - like being wrapped up in a... Well, a deerskin.

AFTER RESTING: I hate to say it but I actually am not gonna try this one again - that sour note was with me while I was feeling particularly ill, and now it makes me sick to think about it. I suppose we'll never really know if it got better. :(

Has a sillage of a couple inches.

RATING: 2/5. It wasn't the worst, and i've got some personal bias here re: smelling it while ill, but that sour note was really unpleasant.

[malodorousmalcontent]

HEXENNACHT REVIEW

UPDATE 01/2021: I no longer support hexennacht on account of some events that transpired a few years ago and will be deleting my reviews of their scents.

[malodorousmalcontent]

ALKEMIA REVIEW

Part two of my previous review! I’ve got the last seven scents on this:  Koi No Yokan; Arabesque; Ensorcelant; Elixir of Aphrodite; Smoke and Mirrors; Midnight Garden; and Love is Nearer Death.

KOI NO YOKAN

NOTES: Plum Blossom, Lotus, Lily of the Valley, Cedar, Black Currant, and Tamarind.

This is the perfume that made me realize that the dominant note that I was smelling in Mina Harker and very strongly in Salome was, in fact, plum, and I like me some plum.

Anyways, this perfume: it's really, really pretty. In the bottle it's this super smooth floral, and then I put it on and it gets bright. Like, really bright. Y'know. Because of that plum blossom. The plum doesn't overwhelm the rest of the florals, though, simply sits atop them - and it's those florals that really sets it apart from Mina. While Mina makes me think of a cold, reserved purple, this is all bright yellows and blues.

This one's got more throw than most - i'm just kinda laying around in bed, wrists nowhere near my nose, and i'm catching the faintest tail-end scent of it. It eventually dries down to something more traditionally sugary-sweet--i'm guessing the tamarind--and lasts a pretty long time. I wore it to bed and when I woke up, there was still a faint hint of it on me.

5/5.

--

ARABESQUE

NOTES: Arabian sandalwood, Mysore sandalwood, precious Egyptian kyphi, sweet orris root, benzoin resin, cassia, and blessed spikenard.

This one I was kinda neutral about when I first got it, and upon putting it on... I'm still pretty neutral about it. The sandalwood is way more subtle than the other sandalwood scent I have - which is The Weird Sisters from Sixteen92. In fact, it's so subtle that the woody notes in this only exist for maybe the first half hour before this just turns into something that is both smooth and creamy, and sugary-sweet, almost like Foxfire but not quite as mouthwatering. And... That's kinda just where it stays.

This has pretty decent longevity - around 5-6 hours - and... I want to say nice throw, but honestly I was getting this the most when I was driving around with the AC in my car basically pointed at my wrists and blowing the scent into my face. Realistically, it's probably just Standard Alkemia On Abby throw.

3/5. It's not bad, but i'm not too excited about it.

--

ENSORCELANT

NOTES: Ripe Raspberries, Jasmine Sambac, Caramel, Aphrodisiac Incenses, Patchouli.

Mmmmh.

So. When I first opened this one up, this was so unpleasantly sour that I balked and basically resigned it to 'i'll try it once, but this is kind of awful'. It's been a few days, and i'm trying it, and... Well, it's better than 'kind of awful'. It's still dizzyingly sour in the bottle, but upon putting it on, it gets... Better? Ish?

Like at first it gets more 'fresh' than 'sour'. And then a little chalky - it starts toeing that 'tums' line but doesn't quite hit it. And then... The caramel starts coming out? And it turns into a sorta subtle fruit-over-caramel? It's not bad, though if I really huff at it, i'm still getting some chalkiness down there. Nice spring or summer scent, maybe.

Dries down to a fruity candy scent, doesn't have a ton of throw, but man, this is another one that I tried washing off and it's still there. Wants to s t a y .

3/5.

--

ELIXIR OF APHRODITE

NOTES: Persian apricots, orange blossom honey, peach and plum blossoms, mimosa, white star jasmine, ambrette, guiac wood, and vanilla musk.

So my mom buys this pie sometimes, right. It's an apple and peach lattice pie, and it's probably in my top 5 favorite desserts, mainly because i'm so intensely weak for peaches. I can, and will, eat that pie all by myself if left to my own devices. It's delicious. It smells delicious.

And this perfume smells like that pie, but prettier.

I can't say it smells like peaches - no, it's specifically peach pie, sweet and candied but not overbearing. The thing that makes it 'but prettier' is the florals underneath it that are subtle but definitely there, and the hint of woodiness from the guiac wood that balances out the sweet. There's also some sharpness - no doubt that plum! Always the plum.

This fades a little fast - its throw is getting closer to the skin within an hour, and it gets to be more reserved/floral and... ....buttery?? as it dries down.

Oooof I just love this, but i'm so biased. It's like this was made for me. Definitely a spring scent, but i'm sitting here like, yah, I could wear this all year round. 5/5.

--

SMOKE AND MIRRORS

NOTES: Burning wood, Madagascar Vanilla, and Tonka.

OOOOF. WOOF. DANG. THIS IS NOT GREAT.

This undoubtedly got included because I told Sharra that I love a smoke note, but, uh. Man. Not a smoke note like this. This is pure BBQ. This is, I sniffed it, and went 'geeze, do I smell a hint of bacon?' This is like, man am I wearing liquid smoke? I could not detect even the slightest hint of vanilla or tonka. Just... Smoke.

I'd read some reviews suggesting using this in layering, so I grabbed the most vanilla-y perfume I have - Foxfire - and tried to layer that. It... Helped. Some. But ultimately it just ended up smelling like Foxfire with a very unwelcome smoke. I scrubbed this pretty quickly, so I guess i'll never know how it does in the drydown.

0/5.

--

MIDNIGHT GARDEN

NOTES: Night flowering Tuberose, Honeysuckle, Gardenia, and Lily.

This sure iiiis a floral! Like... A really basic floral - this is what I would've thought of if someone had said 'floral' to me before ever getting into perfumes. White flowers. Sharp, perfumey, a little soapy. The only note I know i'd be able to distinguish is Honeysuckle, cause I grew up with honeysuckle, n i'm not smelling it here.

It dries down to... A softer basic floral. Again, this isn't bad, just nothing that's really wowing me.

3/5.

--

LOVE IS NEARER DEATH

NOTES: Narcotic Florals - Tuberose, Jasmine Sambac, Dark Orchids, Spicy Carnation, Neroli.

Full disclosure, I didn't give this one much of a chance. In the bottle and on my skin, I didn't actually get much by way of 'florals' - no, all I was picking up was... Black pepper, for some reason. And not a good black pepper like in The Raven. This was like... The black pepper I smell when cooking eggs or steaks. It is not a scent I enjoyed.

Beyond that, on my skin, this mostly just smelled like that and some bitterness underneath. Not crazy about it - I scrubbed it pretty fast.

UPDATE after trying it some time later: I'm picking up more than just black pepper, definitely, but this just kinda smells like... Ass. That's all I really got for it. It's a scrubber - I can't get to the drydown.

0/5.

[malodorousmalcontent]

ALKEMIA REVIEW

This is the first review for twelve samples I received from Alkemia. I’ll be reviewing Foxfire; Vespertilia; Silken Tent; The Raven; and Salome.

FOXFIRE

NOTES: Sugar Infused White Ghost Fire Ambres Blanc, Jasmine Aldehydes, Nardo.

So this one starts out so light I was almost certain that it was gonna disappear on me pretty quickly, but... Actually it didn't! Which was surprising. More than that, it actually has pretty good staying power - i've been wearing it for a couple hours now and it's goin' strong. Its throw is maybe a few inches off the skin - i'm not catching whiffs of it randomly, but I don't have to hunt for it at my wrists.

As for how it actually smells, it's very pretty and feminine. It's soft and fuzzy - that sugar comes out pretty strong, amplified by the vanilla in the white amber. It's interesting: on one wrist I mostly smell that, while on the other it smells more strongly like a floral, with the jasmine aldehydes easier to pick out. I think that's cause I have less of it on the latter wrist and it's drying down faster - I start to catch those sharp jasmine florals on the drydown on the former wrist, too.

4/5! I'm not big on sugary scents, so I don't know if i'll get more of this, but it's objectively a very nice scent. UPDATE: This is now one of my absolutely favorite sleep scents and I wear it all the time. Bumping it up to a 5/5.

--

VESPERTILIA

NOTES: Wild apples, quince, black and jasmine tea, lilies, Palo Santo, golden amberwood.

When I first got it, there was a really fresh note to this that I found super intriguing and nice enough that I set it aside in the, 'ooh i'm excited to try this on', pile. When I put it on, for just a minute or two it got real clean, real soapy - and then kinda faded into something that's just nice, fresh, smooth and just a tiny bit sweet, like a super distant fruit smell. At first I thought it must be the quince, but the more I huff at it, the more i'm getting the apple - light and a little sour, like sniffing a granny smith.  (It's a little harder to pick up because i'm comparing it to S92's Last Exit, which is a super realistic apple scent, like standing in an apple orchard, and this is a little more... Stylized apple.)

On the drydown, it gets a little bit of a woody bitterness to it, and the apple gets a little more amped up. It doesn't have a lot of throw, a little less than the others i've tried, which makes it hard to be sure if it's faded or not with my broken-ass nose since it's already a pretty light scent.

3.5/5. This is a really nice, fresh scent, a little soapy but not too much, but I wish it had more throw.

--

SILKEN TENT

NOTES: Candied angelica, Chrysanthemum, Nardo, Jasmine-scented rice pudding, Blonde caramel, Golden amber.

Wow I wrote a full review for this and then scrapped it because I was writing it as I was wearing the scent, rather than after. So here we go!

This is a cool scent. Uh, not literally, it's actually a really warm scent, I mean cool like... Radical. It starts out for maybe the first 15, 20 minutes as very subtle and elegant - 'silky' is indeed a very good word for it. It's a little sweet, but not as much as I expected (I kept reading about the rice pudding note being, uh, notable), with a decidedly savoriness to it. Not really much floral.

Within half an hour though, boy, that sweetness amps - not enough to be sickening or anything, it still remains very mature and elegant, but now the rice pudding and caramel is very notable, with maybe a hint of floral sitting underneath it. This makes me think of something worn by a statuesque woman with an art deco silhouette dressed in golden silks.

And this binch stays. I wore it for a couple hours with it going strong, then scrubbed it to try something else on - and had to give it a second wash because it just wanted to stay on my skin.

5/5.

--

THE RAVEN

NOTES: Ebony, Black Spice, Leather, Piper Nigrum, Ink, Black Iris.

HA HA OH MAN THIS IS A WEIRD ONE.

This is COLD. Cold as BALLS, and DARK, probably the first time i've smelled something and genuinely gone 'mm, pitch black, yep'. This smell makes me feel like i'm looking down into an inky-black cursed well on a cold night. Ink is definitely the thing i'm smelling the most in this, but it is far from a one-note perfume: i'm also getting the leather, and oh man the PEPPER is literally making my nose tingle, and then just a hint of green, wet floral down at the bottom that is most definitely the black iris. Every note in this stands out while simultaneously combining to make a smooth, dark, spicy, unisex-leaning-masculine, SUPER WEIRD scent.

It fades down a bit after an hour or two, and that pepper goes away, leaving only the slightest trace of it. Mostly what's there now is the ink and leather. The throw is the Standard Alkemia On Abby's Skin - maybe a few inches - and after 2 hours it's still there, but significantly less noticible.

4/5. I really like this, but am docking it half a point for how it's already fading, and half a point for the pepper, which is just a biiit too much for me.

--

SALOME

NOTES: Oriental florals, cognac, dark plum, vanilla, botanical pheromones, and red oud.

Oh, finally, something that's starting out strong.

This is the perfume that taught me to let shit rest for, like, even two seconds. I put this on immediately when I got my package, and mostly what I got was subtle, watery green-ness. After even like, what, 24 hours? 48? It's a totally different scent.

Upon immediate application, this is rich and a little bitter and i'm definitely, definitely getting that dark plum. It's really pretty, the florals are strong and it's a little fruity, and there's something rich in there that I assume is the cognac.

After a lil bit the sharpness that is just this ENTIRE perfume kinda chills out and the notes kinda blend. It's still mostly a fruity floral, but I can just barely get that hint of vanilla somewhere deep down there, sitting under all that and the cognac. This gets warmer and smoother the longer I wear it. It's really nice. It's sexy. This works conceptually just as well as The Raven does.

Standard Alkemia-on-Abby throw of maybe 4 inches from my wrist. Can't report on longevity yet.

UPDATE: holy crap after a couple hours just, wow, pheromones. That shit ain't playing. It's not overpowering, but, wow. Definitely there.

5/5. Might fullsize this one.