matchamauler - Tumblr blog

[matchamauler]

been adding new ones whenever i get an idea hehe

the first lady of l'manburg

a playlist inspired by a headcanon I thought of about schlatt from the dream smp. imagine if president schlatt had a wife. think Jackie Kennedy. smart, beautiful, elegant, charming and adored by all. she loved schlatt with every inch of her heart and soul, not the same can be said about schlatt. it is well known in the lore that schlatt and his vice president, quackity, had a romantic relationship. in this headcannon, schlaat cheats on her to be with quackity. she does not notice this at first, she remains loyal and obedient to schlatt, and even treats quackity like a little brother. once she does become aware of the affair, she is devastated, often finding comfort in cigarettes and alcohol for comfort. she does everything in her power to get schlatt back while serving l'manburg and putting up the illusion that the president’s marriage was nothing but good and perfect. schlatt dies, she weeps like any other widow would. she confronts quackity, lets him know that she has always been aware of what they were doing. she basically cuts ties with him and leaves l'manburg and goes to live far away, in a spruce forest. long story short, technoblade found her one day in the forest while he was out gathering firewood for his cottage on the snow mountain. she tells him everything and invites her to be a part of the syndicate, she joins and has now been living with them in the snow biome, no longer the people-pleasing, oh-so-perfect obedient wife she once was.

playlist link: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/07trA26TBtRUCOFbVd3zl9?si=984e9a719b1d4f15

additional headcanons:

She ADORES pearls, her most prized possession is a layered string of pearls given to her from Schlatt ( think similar to the string of pearls Tom Buchanan gives Daisy in The Great Gatsby film)

It was only her and her dad growing up since her mother died from giving birth to her.

She dresses the way movie starlets do from old movies because growing up, that was the only place where she had feminine fashion influences.

As much as she loves clothes and fashion, she also uses them to send a message or to convey what she’s feeling.

She’s the only one who can get the right taste and recipe for Schlatt’s coffee and how he likes it, personally makes it herself.

Before the cheating scandal, she and Quackity got along very well, often treating and referring to him as family/her little brother.

She genuinely cares about the people, actually would run for president of L’manburg after Schlatt’s death if the country didn’t blow up

It is unknown when and where she and Schlatt met, they don’t talk about it at all.

She actually wanted children of their own, but Schlatt, of course, cannot be bothered to raise them.

Knowing Schlatt, it was probably for the best that her children not have a father like him.

Despite her husband’s and Niki’s feud, she is actually very fond of the girl and is a huge fan of her bakery and its sweets. She personally apologized and kept supporting her and her business after Schlatt raised her taxes.

When Niki was imprisoned, she and Schlatt had a nasty argument regarding the situation, unfortunately, Schlatt did not budge nor care.

After joining the syndicate, she and Niki have become close friends.

She adored Tubbo, often thinking and treating him like her son.

She visits Ranboo and Tubbo often, She is actually Michael’s godmother, the kid is spoilt rotten when it comes to her, loves him to death, often referring to the boy as her favorite.

She has the taste for the finer things in life, rumor has it she comes from an old-money type of family and has more wealth than Schlatt.

Hoping to send a warning and a message to the people, she wore a yellow dress to the Manberg Festival, she knew what Schlatt was planning but had no power to stop him. ( According to Google, Yellow is the color of ambivalence and contradiction; the color associated with optimism and amusement; but also with betrayal, duplicity, and jealousy.)

She despises Dream, when asked about her opinions on the green man, she just frowned and said, “He is a child, with nothing better to do than mess with actual children. Giving away trauma and pain like suburban mothers giving away candy on Halloween. He disgusts me.”

Note that this woman rarely has negative opinions on anybody (before the whole affair anyway)

She only found out about the revival book after Dream was put in prison, she had no idea Schlatt had the book the entire time they were together.

During the Manberg vs. Pogtopia War, she remained at her and Schlatt’s bedroom, drinking wine and reportedly smoked 3 packs of cigarettes.

During Schlatt’s funeral, in which she did not attend, watched from the distance, where nobody could see her cry, wearing a black mourning gown, a black veil, and the string of pearls.

During her confrontation with Quackity about the affair, she gave him her wedding ring.

“You were his, and he was yours, there is no doubt about that. I loved him, it’s true. But you, Quackity, I have never seen his eyes light up when he’s near you. It’s better if you have this, he would’ve done the same and took it off my finger and placed it onto yours if he got the chance, and I wouldn’t blame him, I would turn night into day to see his eyes shine like that every day if it meant he can be with you.”

After joining the syndicate, she surprisingly had a knack for archery and was found that she was an excellent shot.

She and Technoblade once shared a house together, they would play chess, waltz, and/or foxtrots, and read books in silence. Philza once described them as “An old married couple, platonically, of course.” (The waltz/foxtrot songs in the playlist are what she and Techno dances to)

She is canonically an ABBA fan.

Her favorite dessert is ice cream, she makes homemade ones herself and gives the syndicate their own supply when she makes a big batch.

She hates the nether, she just asks techno to get the things she needs from there.

She loves to sew, finds it focus-inducing and calming.

Owns an underground library. She built it herself and is located under her cottage, she and techno frequent it often.

Niki attempted to teach her how to make bread, she ended up setting Niki’s kitchen on fire. She never went near a stove ever again.

Just like everyone else, she sees Philza as a father figure and feels safe whenever he’s around.

Ranboo taught her the Enderman language, she got the hang of it pretty fast and often communicates with Ranboo using it.

She hasn’t been back to L’manburg ever since she left. Has no plans of coming back.

She was once approached by Badboyhalo and attempted to recruit her to be a part of the Eggpire to which she responded with a smile and drew her bow and arrow to his head.

“I was thought you were wise Bad, now I find myself irritated at the thought of myself actually having that impression of you, how stupid. Almost as stupid as what you are attempting to do now. Leave, boy, before my finger slips and an arrow gets stuck to your head.”

Safe to say, Badboyhalo hates her now.

As for her relationship with Tommy, they seem to have a familial bond, Tommy thinking of her as a big sister.

She’s always looking out for Tommy, whenever he visits, she grabs fresh baked goods from Niki’s and makes coffee for the both of them, and just have a nice afternoon chat with Tommy.

It is also noticeable that Tommy is significantly calmer and composed when talking to her/around her.

After what Niki told her about what Wilbur did, she consistently now tries to warn Tommy about Revivebur, and that he should always be wary of the once dead man’s intentions.

She has plans to visit Las Nevadas.

She’s one of the only heterosexual people in the SMP, if not the only one (yes, you can bully her, go ahead /j)

She can’t swim, has a fear of the ocean.

She wears red lipstick every day, and I mean EVERYDAY. It’s to cover up her darkened lips from smoking cigarettes.

She’s the only one who knows what Schlatt’s first name is. She has his initials tattoed on the side of her ring finger.

As for Glatt, she knows about him, of course, but decides that it’s better off not engaging with him in any way, after all, he did cheat on her. The poor woman is trying to move on.

She spends most of her time looking after Technoblade’s many pets when she’s not training or running errands. She volunteered to help around the house and take care of the animals because it makes her feel “motherly”.

She commissioned Foolish for a mansion of her own, she rarely spends her time there though, since she’s always at Techno’s helping out.

But when she does, she either throws a huge party/gathering for the Syndicate or completely isolates herself from everybody for a couple of weeks.

Her mansion walls are plastered with paintings. Whether it is by a local artist’s paintings that she bought at a flea market, her and Schlatt’s official presidential portraits (one of the paintings is where Schlatt is seen sitting in his office chair while she leans into the armchair kinda vibe), her own self-portraits, official first lady photographs, a painting she commissioned with the Syndicate, displaying all of them in a very regal manner, with other various portraits of her friends, and a painting of her parents.

Her personal favorite is the Syndicate painting, everybody found it unnecessary and troublesome that she had to fight teeth and bone and had to practically drag everyone to the mansion and into their gowns, suits, and crowns to have the painting done.

After the painting was done, everybody eventually came around and said it was actually “really damn good”.

She may seem calm and collected on the outside but she actually has a very short temper and can lash out unexpectedly.

She’s working on it though

But again, she finds it very difficult to control her anger

There are rumors that she has witch lineage in her, from her mother’s side. She hasn’t confirmed nor denied it.

You probably think as put together as she is, she has pretty manicured nails, she does not. She has this terrible habit of biting her fingernails off and picking on her cuticles.

She writes poems, about everything. and i mean EVERYTHING.

She has a very hard time dealing with pressure and stress. She either shuts down and disappears out of thin air (confirming her witch lineage, she literally just casts a spell to take her away from the situation) or she has a very bad panic attack which can lead to her becoming violent and destructive.

Few people have actually seen her angry and frustrated though, she tries to be alone in dealing with her anger.

Technoblade actually accompanies her when she wants to let some steam off, just to make sure she doesn’t hurt herself in the process.

She says it’s unnecessary, but she secretly is very thankful for Technoblade and his companionship.

She’s very stubborn and reckless, she hates people telling her what to do.

With Technoblade locked in prison, she has become even more restless and panicky.

Her anger issues and anxiety has been getting the best of her, she locked herself in her mansion ever since Technoblade left.

Her alcoholism got worse and is smoking more and more cigarettes to relieve some of the distress she is in.

She sometimes goes to the Mumza’s magical forest and talks to her, seeking advice and telling her how much she misses Techno.

[matchamauler]

exile arc but every day someone puts on a blonde wig and red n white t shirt and takes Tommy’s place as they all try to gaslight Dream

quackity: Hello it is me tommyinnit

dream: you aren’t tommyinnit and you don’t look or sound like him

quackity: *in a British accent* hello it is me tommyinnit

dream: tubbo I can see that it’s you

tubbo, wearing the ugliest blonde wig known to man: what? im tommyinnit. here I’ll prove it I just need some flint n steel and the location of your house

dream: are you ghostbur?

ghostbur: yes!

Phil: oh I forgot to tell you! Tommy’s street name is ghostbur. that’s why he said that :)

dream:

dream: oh hi “Tommy” why is your hair blue?

jack manifold, who didn’t own any other wigs: I’m going through a mid life crisis

dream: Ranboo I can see that you’re an enderman

ranboo, wearing a red and white suit: im tommyinnit. I remember everything. i can definitely swim mhm mhm

Dream: you aren’t even wearing the red and white. you’re just another blonde guy

purpled, a paid actor: wdym didn’t you know there’s only one blonde person ever. im tommyinnit

dream: technoblade what I meant to think of this

technoblade, wearing a sign that says ‘im tommyinnit’: well most people think I’m annoying at first

dream: you’re literally a pig

technoblade: that’s kinda rude to say about the British

Dream: how are you here. you’re dead.

glatt, who pierced the veil of life and death in order to make fun of tommy: no im tommyinnit. pogchamp or something

[matchamauler]

The things she says

context: https://matchamauler.tumblr.com/post/655238575291596800/the-first-lady-of-lmanburg

"To you, I surrender, to you I dedicate. you have my heart and soul. in this life and the next, I am here, I am yours."

- her wedding vow to Schlatt

" Good people of L'manburg, I am your humble servant. Let us do everything to ease and secure your lives. Let us be of assistance and of refuge. Let us into your hearts."

"I am lucky to have you as a confidante, Quackity. You are such a joy to be around. Your ideas are wondrous and innovative. You are a brother to me. You are family."

"Forgive him, forgive me, Niki. I am truly sorry. I can't change his mind, no one can. I swear on pearls and diamonds, I will be personally making up for everything, let me help you."

"Love is cruel. Love is murder. What, now, is my purpose when I longer am not to him?"

" I am finished being just a dead president's wife, I am done being just the first lady of a dead country. I accept your invitation, Technoblade. Show me how to be more than just, just. '

" I am happy, more than I ever was. Thank you for being the family I never got to have. Every single one of you, you have saved me, more than you'll ever know. I have been giving love all my life, but never once received it back. You gave me love and much, much more. I now know my purpose. I now know what love is supposed to feel like."

"Tommy, I'm telling you now, betrayal is a deep wound. It will not heal for a long, long time, who am I kidding? It may not even heal at all. Be careful around that man, I suggest you don't add any more scratches to that collection of scars you have."

"He's my boy, of course, anything he asks of me is always going to be my command. He deserves nothing less than to be spoilt rotten."

"Mumza, Technoblade hasn't come home. I miss him, I feel like I'm growing more mad everyday without him to be my reason. I'm going insane, I need help. I need Technoblade!"

note: will be adding more quotes, I just need to think of more before I do.

disclaimer:

this is just an OC i thought of, she is not real lol, hell, she doesn't even have a name. I was actually going to name her Clementine but I remembered Tommy, I think, had a pet named Clementine? I'm not too sure, but I think the name Clementine probably already exists canonically in the Dream SMP.

some of her characteristics may be based around my own personality lmao, just a couple though.

she is faceless in my mind, but I want her to have black hair. That's it.

her wardrobe in her first lady arc is inspired by Jackie Kennedy, elegant and regal. Her Syndicate looks though consist of furs, long-sleeved shirts, and the occasional ripped up, repurposed dresses.

[matchamauler]

GOOD GOD

he is GOING to kill me

[matchamauler]

Squid Game + The Mincing Mockingbird Guide to Troubled Birds

[matchamauler]

uh, hey. im not sure who's gonna see this but i know people are probably freaking out really bad right now—

technoblade's gonna be okay, dude. i promise. from a medical standpoint, techno did the really healthy thing by immediately getting himself checked out and diagnosed, which is really, really good. he's got really fucking good doctors, which he's told us himself, and he's probably not exaggerating—the phrase techno millionares had to come from somewhere, right? he's in good enough health and spirits to talk to people (including online fans!) and record content, and insists on doing so, somehow, and he's got a really good network of irl friends to help him through all this. and, come on now. it's technoblade. he won't hesitate to drop us the minute his health requires it. he's cool like that :)

if you're having a hard time, or you feel scared or anxious or panicky—don't feel bad about it. you're empathetic, and you care, and that is so beyond lovely. but please, keep all this in mind. don't let it consume you too much, yeah? drink some water, watch something that makes you feel safe. listen to the blood god himself. he's pretty optimistic. our guy's got this.

[matchamauler]

the first lady of l'manburg

a playlist inspired by a headcanon I thought of about schlatt from the dream smp. imagine if president schlatt had a wife. think Jackie Kennedy. smart, beautiful, elegant, charming and adored by all. she loved schlatt with every inch of her heart and soul, not the same can be said about schlatt. it is well known in the lore that schlatt and his vice president, quackity, had a romantic relationship. in this headcannon, schlaat cheats on her to be with quackity. she does not notice this at first, she remains loyal and obedient to schlatt, and even treats quackity like a little brother. once she does become aware of the affair, she is devastated, often finding comfort in cigarettes and alcohol for comfort. she does everything in her power to get schlatt back while serving l'manburg and putting up the illusion that the president's marriage was nothing but good and perfect. schlatt dies, she weeps like any other widow would. she confronts quackity, lets him know that she has always been aware of what they were doing. she basically cuts ties with him and leaves l'manburg and goes to live far away, in a spruce forest. long story short, technoblade found her one day in the forest while he was out gathering firewood for his cottage on the snow mountain. she tells him everything and invites her to be a part of the syndicate, she joins and has now been living with them in the snow biome, no longer the people-pleasing, oh-so-perfect obedient wife she once was.

playlist link: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/07trA26TBtRUCOFbVd3zl9?si=984e9a719b1d4f15

additional headcanons:

She ADORES pearls, her most prized possession is a layered string of pearls given to her from Schlatt ( think similar to the string of pearls Tom Buchanan gives Daisy in The Great Gatsby film)

As much as she loves clothes and fashion, she also uses them to send a message or to convey what she’s feeling (red Chanel suit if she’s feeling irritated, white flowy summer dress for community gatherings outside in the summer to seem more angelic and kind, black pantsuit for speeches to seem more domineering and serious)

She’s the only one who can get the right taste and recipe for Schlatt’s coffee and how he likes it, personally makes it herself.

Before the cheating scandal, she and Quackity got along very well, often treating and referring to him as family/her little brother.

She genuinely cares about the people, actually would run for president of L’manburg after Schlatt’s death if the country didn’t blow up

It is unknown when and where she and Schlatt met, they don’t talk about it at all.

She actually wanted children of their own, but Schlatt, of course, cannot be bothered to raise them.

Knowing Schlatt, it was probably for the best that her children not have a father like him.

Despite her husband’s and Niki’s feud, she is actually very fond of the girl and is a huge fan of her bakery and its sweets. She personally apologized and kept supporting her and her business after Schlatt raised her taxes.

When Niki was imprisoned, she and Schlatt had a nasty argument regarding the situation, unfortunately, Schlatt did not budge nor care.

After joining the syndicate, she and Niki have become close friends.

She adored Tubbo, often thinking and treating him like her son.

She visits Ranboo and Tubbo often, She is actually Michael’s godmother, the kid is spoilt rotten when it comes to her, loves him to death, often referring to the boy as her favorite.

She has the taste for the finer things in life, rumor has it she comes from an old-money type of family and has more wealth than Schlatt.

Hoping to send a warning and a message to the people, she wore a yellow dress to the Manberg Festival, she knew what Schlatt was planning but had no power to stop him. ( According to Google, Yellow is the color of ambivalence and contradiction; the color associated with optimism and amusement; but also with betrayal, duplicity, and jealousy.)

She despises Dream, when asked about her opinions on the green man, she just frowned and said, “He is a child, with nothing better to do than mess with actual children. Giving away trauma and pain like suburban mothers giving away candy on Halloween. He disgusts me.”

Note that this woman rarely has negative opinions on anybody (before the whole affair anyway)

She only found out about the revival book after Dream was put in prison, she had no idea Schlatt had the book the entire time they were together.

During the Manberg vs. Pogtopia War, she remained at her and Schlatt’s bedroom, drinking wine and reportedly smoked 3 packs of cigarettes.

During Schlatt’s funeral, in which she did not attend, watched from the distance, where nobody could see her cry, wearing a black mourning gown, a black veil, and the string of pearls.

During her confrontation with Quackity about the affair, she gave him her wedding ring.

“You were his, and he was yours, there is no doubt about that. I loved him, it’s true. But you, Quackity, I have never seen his eyes light up when he’s near you. It’s better if you have this, he would’ve done the same and took it off my finger and placed it onto yours if he got the chance, and I wouldn’t blame him, I would turn night into day to see his eyes shine like that every day if it meant he can be with you.”

After joining the syndicate, she surprisingly had a knack for archery and was found that she was an excellent shot.

Technoblade once described her as “Lethally forgiving, and forgivingly lethal.”

She and Technoblade once shared a house together, they would play chess, waltz, and/or foxtrots, and read books in silence. Philza once described them as “An old married couple, platonically, of course.” (The waltz/foxtrot songs in the playlist are what she and Techno dances to)

She is canonically an ABBA fan.

Her favorite dessert is ice cream, she makes homemade ones herself and gives the syndicate their own supply when she makes a big batch.

She hates the nether, she just asks techno to get the things she needs from there.

She loves to sew, finds it focus-inducing and calming.

Owns an underground library. She built it herself and is located under her cottage, she and techno frequent it often.

Niki attempted to teach her how to make bread, she ended up setting Niki’s kitchen on fire. She never went near a stove ever again.

Just like everyone else, she sees Philza as a father figure and feels safe whenever he’s around.

Ranboo taught her the Enderman language, she got the hang of it pretty fast and often communicates with Ranboo using it.

She hasn’t been back to L’manburg ever since she left. Has no plans of coming back.

She was once approached by Badboyhalo and attempted to recruit her to be a part of the Eggpire to which she responded with a smile and drew her bow and arrow to his head.

"I was thought you were wise Bad, now I find myself irritated at the thought of myself actually having that impression of you, how stupid. Almost as stupid as what you are attempting to do now. Leave, boy, before my finger slips and an arrow gets stuck to your head."

Safe to say, Badboyhalo hates her now.

As for her relationship with Tommy, they seem to have a familial bond, Tommy thinking of her as a big sister.

She's always looking out for Tommy, whenever he visits, she grabs fresh baked goods from Niki's and makes coffee for the both of them, and just have a nice afternoon chat with Tommy.

It is also noticeable that Tommy is significantly calmer and composed when talking to her/around her.

After what Niki told her about what Wilbur did, she consistently now tries to warn Tommy about Revivebur, and that he should always be wary of the once dead man's intentions.

She has plans to visit Las Nevadas.

She's one of the only heterosexual people in the SMP, if not the only one (yes, you can bully her, go ahead /j)

She can't swim, has a fear of the ocean.

She wears red lipstick every day, and I mean EVERYDAY. It's to cover up her darkened lips from smoking cigarettes.

She's the only one who knows what Schlatt's first name is. She has his initials tattoed on the side of her ring finger.

As for Glatt, she knows about him, of course, but decides that it's better off not engaging with him in any way, after all, he did cheat on her. The poor woman is trying to move on.

She spends most of her time looking after Technoblade's many pets when she's not training or running errands. She volunteered to help around the house and take care of the animals because it makes her feel "motherly".

She commissioned Foolish for a mansion of her own, she rarely spends her time there though, since she's always at Techno's helping out.

But when she does, she either throws a huge party/gathering for the Syndicate or completely isolates herself from everybody for a couple of weeks.

Her mansion walls are plastered with paintings. Whether it is by a local artist's paintings that she bought at a flea market, her and Schlatt's official presidential portraits (one of the paintings is where Schlatt is seen sitting in his office chair while she leans into the armchair kinda vibe), her own self-portraits, official first lady photographs, a painting she commissioned with the Syndicate, displaying all of them in a very regal manner, with other various portraits of her friends, and a painting of her parents.

Her personal favorite is the Syndicate painting, everybody found it unnecessary and troublesome that she had to fight teeth and bone and had to practically drag everyone to the mansion and into their gowns, suits, and crowns to have the painting done.

After the painting was done, everybody eventually came around and said it was actually "really damn good".

She may seem calm and collected on the outside but she actually has a very short temper and can lash out unexpectedly.

She's working on it though

But again, she finds it very difficult to control her anger

There are rumors that she has witch lineage in her, from her mother's side. She hasn't confirmed nor denied it.

You probably think as put together as she is, she has pretty manicured nails, she does not. She has this terrible habit of biting her fingernails off and picking on her cuticles.

She writes poems, about everything. and i mean EVERYTHING.

She has a very hard time dealing with pressure and stress. She either shuts down and disappears out of thin air (confirming her witch lineage, she literally just casts a spell to take her away from the situation) or she has a very bad panic attack which can lead to her becoming violent and destructive.

Few people have actually seen her angry and frustrated though, she tries to be alone in dealing with her anger.

Technoblade actually accompanies her when she wants to let some steam off, just to make sure she doesn't hurt herself in the process.

She says it's unnecessary, but she secretly is very thankful for Technoblade and his companionship.

[matchamauler]

hi i just needed everyone to know i’ve watched this clip of sapnap and karl an unhealthy amount of times

[matchamauler]

fuck it, her name is clementine

context: https://matchamauler.tumblr.com/post/655238575291596800/the-first-lady-of-lmanburg

https://matchamauler.tumblr.com/post/655694098349637632/the-things-she-says

for the love of gosh, I cannot think of any other name that would fit her except clementine. apparently, clementine is the hypothetical moth c!tommy wants to have. in other words, the name clementine is canon, but it does not exist. hell, Michael and Michaelmcchill have the same name anyway. it's official, her name is clementine, (formerly clementine schlatt, first lady of l'manburg)

[matchamauler]

i made her wardrobe moodboard thing

context: https://matchamauler.tumblr.com/post/655238575291596800/the-first-lady-of-lmanburg

So i went on Pinterest and made boards, one for her first lady arc and one for her syndicate arc.

The First Lady arc: https://pin.it/4khOsbs

In her first lady days, she wears very structured, elegant and neat silhouette. Very vintage and formal. Limited. Fancy. Put together. I also added the black mourning for Schlatt's funeral and the black robe that I was talking ab in the original post that she wears when Schlatt dies.

The Syndicate Arc: https://pin.it/7u3Fpkp

When she joins the Syndicate, she switches her wardrobe into more snow and cold weather-appropriate pieces with capes and fur coats, it is noticeable that it is more laid back and modern compared to her First Lady looks but you can still see the elegance around it.

ps. i will be adding more pins to the boards

[matchamauler]

i might make a moodboard for her

context: https://matchamauler.tumblr.com/post/655238575291596800/the-first-lady-of-lmanburg

kinda wanna make a moodboard for her so that y'all can catch her vibe and shiiii (idk why i'm talking like this) anyway, brb in a couple hours, i'll just be on pinterest if u need me.

p.s when i say mooboard i kinda mean what she would wear, so not really a moodboard but then again it will give off her vibes nontheless

[matchamauler]

ask away girlbosses

context: https://matchamauler.tumblr.com/post/655238575291596800/the-first-lady-of-lmanburg

hello! i am very much open to questions, suggestions, comments and criticism on my first lady headcanon and OC, feel free to hit up my AMA's if you like!

[matchamauler]

The things she says

context: https://matchamauler.tumblr.com/post/655238575291596800/the-first-lady-of-lmanburg

"To you, I surrender, to you I dedicate. you have my heart and soul. in this life and the next, I am here, I am yours."

- her wedding vow to Schlatt

" Good people of L'manburg, I am your humble servant. Let us do everything to ease and secure your lives. Let us be of assistance and of refuge. Let us into your hearts."

"I am lucky to have you as a confidante, Quackity. You are such a joy to be around. Your ideas are wondrous and innovative. You are a brother to me. You are family."

"Forgive him, forgive me, Niki. I am truly sorry. I can't change his mind, no one can. I swear on pearls and diamonds, I will be personally making up for everything, let me help you."

"Love is cruel. Love is murder. What, now, is my purpose when I longer am not to him?"

" I am finished being just a dead president's wife, I am done being just the first lady of a dead country. I accept your invitation, Technoblade. Show me how to be more than just, just. '

" I am happy, more than I ever was. Thank you for being the family I never got to have. Every single one of you, you have saved me, more than you'll ever know. I have been giving love all my life, but never once received it back. You gave me love and much, much more. I now know my purpose. I now know what love is supposed to feel like."

"Tommy, I'm telling you now, betrayal is a deep wound. It will not heal for a long, long time, who am I kidding? It may not even heal at all. Be careful around that man, I suggest you don't add any more scratches to that collection of scars you have."

"He's my boy, of course, anything he asks of me is always going to be my command. He deserves nothing less than to be spoilt rotten."

"Mumza, Technoblade hasn't come home. I miss him, I feel like I'm growing more mad everyday without him to be my reason. I'm going insane, I need help. I need Technoblade!"

note: will be adding more quotes, I just need to think of more before I do.

disclaimer:

this is just an OC i thought of, she is not real lol, hell, she doesn't even have a name. I was actually going to name her Clementine but I remembered Tommy, I think, had a pet named Clementine? I'm not too sure, but I think the name Clementine probably already exists canonically in the Dream SMP.

some of her characteristics may be based around my own personality lmao, just a couple though.

she is faceless in my mind, but I want her to have black hair. That's it.

her wardrobe in her first lady arc is inspired by Jackie Kennedy, elegant and regal. Her Syndicate looks though consist of furs, long-sleeved shirts, and the occasional ripped up, repurposed dresses.

[matchamauler]

The Addams Family renting out rooms in their huge mansion cheaply to broke college students.

The students digging it because the craziness and the bugs are pretty much the same as any other dorm house. Also, Morticia and Gomez treat them all like visiting cousins, not like tenants to abuse and exploit. 

[matchamauler]

the first lady of l'manburg

a playlist inspired by a headcanon I thought of about schlatt from the dream smp. imagine if president schlatt had a wife. think Jackie Kennedy. smart, beautiful, elegant, charming and adored by all. she loved schlatt with every inch of her heart and soul, not the same can be said about schlatt. it is well known in the lore that schlatt and his vice president, quackity, had a romantic relationship. in this headcannon, schlaat cheats on her to be with quackity. she does not notice this at first, she remains loyal and obedient to schlatt, and even treats quackity like a little brother. once she does become aware of the affair, she is devastated, often finding comfort in cigarettes and alcohol for comfort. she does everything in her power to get schlatt back while serving l'manburg and putting up the illusion that the president's marriage was nothing but good and perfect. schlatt dies, she weeps like any other widow would. she confronts quackity, lets him know that she has always been aware of what they were doing. she basically cuts ties with him and leaves l'manburg and goes to live far away, in a spruce forest. long story short, technoblade found her one day in the forest while he was out gathering firewood for his cottage on the snow mountain. she tells him everything and invites her to be a part of the syndicate, she joins and has now been living with them in the snow biome, no longer the people-pleasing, oh-so-perfect obedient wife she once was.

playlist link: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/07trA26TBtRUCOFbVd3zl9?si=984e9a719b1d4f15

additional headcanons:

She ADORES pearls, her most prized possession is a layered string of pearls given to her from Schlatt ( think similar to the string of pearls Tom Buchanan gives Daisy in The Great Gatsby film)

It was only her and her dad growing up since her mother died from giving birth to her.

She dresses the way movie starlets do from old movies because growing up, that was the only place where she had feminine fashion influences.

As much as she loves clothes and fashion, she also uses them to send a message or to convey what she’s feeling.

She’s the only one who can get the right taste and recipe for Schlatt’s coffee and how he likes it, personally makes it herself.

Before the cheating scandal, she and Quackity got along very well, often treating and referring to him as family/her little brother.

She genuinely cares about the people, actually would run for president of L’manburg after Schlatt’s death if the country didn’t blow up

It is unknown when and where she and Schlatt met, they don’t talk about it at all.

She actually wanted children of their own, but Schlatt, of course, cannot be bothered to raise them.

Knowing Schlatt, it was probably for the best that her children not have a father like him.

Despite her husband’s and Niki’s feud, she is actually very fond of the girl and is a huge fan of her bakery and its sweets. She personally apologized and kept supporting her and her business after Schlatt raised her taxes.

When Niki was imprisoned, she and Schlatt had a nasty argument regarding the situation, unfortunately, Schlatt did not budge nor care.

After joining the syndicate, she and Niki have become close friends.

She adored Tubbo, often thinking and treating him like her son.

She visits Ranboo and Tubbo often, She is actually Michael’s godmother, the kid is spoilt rotten when it comes to her, loves him to death, often referring to the boy as her favorite.

She has the taste for the finer things in life, rumor has it she comes from an old-money type of family and has more wealth than Schlatt.

Hoping to send a warning and a message to the people, she wore a yellow dress to the Manberg Festival, she knew what Schlatt was planning but had no power to stop him. ( According to Google, Yellow is the color of ambivalence and contradiction; the color associated with optimism and amusement; but also with betrayal, duplicity, and jealousy.)

She despises Dream, when asked about her opinions on the green man, she just frowned and said, “He is a child, with nothing better to do than mess with actual children. Giving away trauma and pain like suburban mothers giving away candy on Halloween. He disgusts me.”

Note that this woman rarely has negative opinions on anybody (before the whole affair anyway)

She only found out about the revival book after Dream was put in prison, she had no idea Schlatt had the book the entire time they were together.

During the Manberg vs. Pogtopia War, she remained at her and Schlatt’s bedroom, drinking wine and reportedly smoked 3 packs of cigarettes.

During Schlatt’s funeral, in which she did not attend, watched from the distance, where nobody could see her cry, wearing a black mourning gown, a black veil, and the string of pearls.

During her confrontation with Quackity about the affair, she gave him her wedding ring.

“You were his, and he was yours, there is no doubt about that. I loved him, it’s true. But you, Quackity, I have never seen his eyes light up when he’s near you. It’s better if you have this, he would’ve done the same and took it off my finger and placed it onto yours if he got the chance, and I wouldn’t blame him, I would turn night into day to see his eyes shine like that every day if it meant he can be with you.”

After joining the syndicate, she surprisingly had a knack for archery and was found that she was an excellent shot.

She and Technoblade once shared a house together, they would play chess, waltz, and/or foxtrots, and read books in silence. Philza once described them as “An old married couple, platonically, of course.” (The waltz/foxtrot songs in the playlist are what she and Techno dances to)

She is canonically an ABBA fan.

Her favorite dessert is ice cream, she makes homemade ones herself and gives the syndicate their own supply when she makes a big batch.

She hates the nether, she just asks techno to get the things she needs from there.

She loves to sew, finds it focus-inducing and calming.

Owns an underground library. She built it herself and is located under her cottage, she and techno frequent it often.

Niki attempted to teach her how to make bread, she ended up setting Niki’s kitchen on fire. She never went near a stove ever again.

Just like everyone else, she sees Philza as a father figure and feels safe whenever he’s around.

Ranboo taught her the Enderman language, she got the hang of it pretty fast and often communicates with Ranboo using it.

She hasn’t been back to L’manburg ever since she left. Has no plans of coming back.

She was once approached by Badboyhalo and attempted to recruit her to be a part of the Eggpire to which she responded with a smile and drew her bow and arrow to his head.

"I was thought you were wise Bad, now I find myself irritated at the thought of myself actually having that impression of you, how stupid. Almost as stupid as what you are attempting to do now. Leave, boy, before my finger slips and an arrow gets stuck to your head."

Safe to say, Badboyhalo hates her now.

As for her relationship with Tommy, they seem to have a familial bond, Tommy thinking of her as a big sister.

She's always looking out for Tommy, whenever he visits, she grabs fresh baked goods from Niki's and makes coffee for the both of them, and just have a nice afternoon chat with Tommy.

It is also noticeable that Tommy is significantly calmer and composed when talking to her/around her.

After what Niki told her about what Wilbur did, she consistently now tries to warn Tommy about Revivebur, and that he should always be wary of the once dead man's intentions.

She has plans to visit Las Nevadas.

She's one of the only heterosexual people in the SMP, if not the only one (yes, you can bully her, go ahead /j)

She can't swim, has a fear of the ocean.

She wears red lipstick every day, and I mean EVERYDAY. It's to cover up her darkened lips from smoking cigarettes.

She's the only one who knows what Schlatt's first name is. She has his initials tattoed on the side of her ring finger.

As for Glatt, she knows about him, of course, but decides that it's better off not engaging with him in any way, after all, he did cheat on her. The poor woman is trying to move on.

She spends most of her time looking after Technoblade's many pets when she's not training or running errands. She volunteered to help around the house and take care of the animals because it makes her feel "motherly".

She commissioned Foolish for a mansion of her own, she rarely spends her time there though, since she's always at Techno's helping out.

But when she does, she either throws a huge party/gathering for the Syndicate or completely isolates herself from everybody for a couple of weeks.

Her mansion walls are plastered with paintings. Whether it is by a local artist's paintings that she bought at a flea market, her and Schlatt's official presidential portraits (one of the paintings is where Schlatt is seen sitting in his office chair while she leans into the armchair kinda vibe), her own self-portraits, official first lady photographs, a painting she commissioned with the Syndicate, displaying all of them in a very regal manner, with other various portraits of her friends, and a painting of her parents.

Her personal favorite is the Syndicate painting, everybody found it unnecessary and troublesome that she had to fight teeth and bone and had to practically drag everyone to the mansion and into their gowns, suits, and crowns to have the painting done.

After the painting was done, everybody eventually came around and said it was actually "really damn good".

She may seem calm and collected on the outside but she actually has a very short temper and can lash out unexpectedly.

She's working on it though

But again, she finds it very difficult to control her anger

There are rumors that she has witch lineage in her, from her mother's side. She hasn't confirmed nor denied it.

You probably think as put together as she is, she has pretty manicured nails, she does not. She has this terrible habit of biting her fingernails off and picking on her cuticles.

She writes poems, about everything. and i mean EVERYTHING.

She has a very hard time dealing with pressure and stress. She either shuts down and disappears out of thin air (confirming her witch lineage, she literally just casts a spell to take her away from the situation) or she has a very bad panic attack which can lead to her becoming violent and destructive.

Few people have actually seen her angry and frustrated though, she tries to be alone in dealing with her anger.

Technoblade actually accompanies her when she wants to let some steam off, just to make sure she doesn't hurt herself in the process.

She says it's unnecessary, but she secretly is very thankful for Technoblade and his companionship.

She's very stubborn and reckless, she hates people telling her what to do.

With Technoblade locked in prison, she has become even more restless and panicky.

Her anger issues and anxiety has been getting the best of her, she locked herself in her mansion ever since Technoblade left.

Her alcoholism got worse and is smoking more and more cigarettes to relieve some of the distress she is in.

She sometimes goes to the Mumza's magical forest and talks to her, seeking advice and telling her how much she misses Techno.

[matchamauler]

President's Assistant.

Please do not publish my work/ content to different websites and platforms, I only post my work here on tumblr and wattpad.

A/n: This is the second part to President's Assitant but instead of Schlatt dying when he was confronted he made a run for it and was able to run away with tons of injuries because he was unarmed and people were launching arrows at him and stuff, Also warning that I curse so warning to that.

Fem!Reader.

You decided that you had enough with this bullshit and decided to finally just pack your stuff and move far away.

Walking out of the walls of L'manburg you look back and sigh, you would leave the people you basically grew up with people you saw as family, but there was no turning back now there was nothing you could do.

It would be difficult to fix L'manburg on your own and with your position next to the president you would be targeted for going against him.

Right...the President, Jschlatt the man your were somehow in love with.

Shaking your head you trudged forward and went to find a place far from the Dream smp and L'manburg but lucky for you, you remember encountering a forest back in your days were you travelled free and not stuck on an office desk.

When you arrived you had wondered a bit when you found a nice clearing that seemed to be in the heart of the forest you chopped down a few tress and made a small cabin that you would extend soon when you settle down for a while.

It had been a few days already and things had been going smoothly during your time in the woods, you were currently working on your farm because you needed another source for food other than animals because if you are able to start a farm you can also start gathering animals as well.

You were going through your chests for some seeds you had collected when static from your walkie talkie coming out but it won't be able to work since you're in far proximity from everyone's, not if they're close to where you are.

....

You hesitate a bit and walk over to your table to pick up the walkie talkie and adjust frequencies it came out jumbled and distant words.

"What the fuck?" you whisper to yourself.

You shake your head, turning off your walkie talkie you place it back down on the table and grab the seeds you found from your chest and your hoe you open your door and made a spot to start the farm.

Wiping the sweat from your forehead you look around and take out your axe from your inventory and went to chop down some trees for wood for the fence so you can surround your farm.

Going a bit far from your house you start chopping a dark oak tree, glancing a bit to the side.

You've chopped down about a few trees down and you've already got about 3 stacks already, deciding that was enough you place your axe into your inventory and walk back to your house and start making some fences.

Placing them down you take note to put some more torches around your house so you place some torches on the corner of your farm on top of the fences, placing down the two gates you made you clap your hands together and let out a long breath.

After working a lot for the past few days, you're gonna need some time for yourself.

Looking over your area you're proud of the progress and things you were able to get done, the nether portal you made in which you made a path to the nether fortress you had stumble over in one of your adventures, the little unfinished barn you started building for the animals you will soon gather and a little flower garden.

Opening the door to your house, you move to go to your chests and organize your inventory you make your way to your bathroom to change your clothes then come back out to start making dinner.

You can hear the monsters groaning and growling from outside your house they must've spotted someone...

You continue with making soup and not processing anything at all when a continuous banging was being made against your door, switching stoves you make to grab your sword and look out your window, you see Schlatt outside with a horde of monsters walking towards him you open the door and pull him inside.

You look over his figure, he was holding his bleeding arm and had cuts and bruises all over, pushing away his hand to look over his bleeding arm it was a nasty cut .

Guiding him to sit on your couch you grab your first aid supply and sit next to him.

Taking off his suit jacket you rinsed a cloth with some water and placed it on the wound while he hisses you mumble a quick sorry and place your palm firmly against it to control the bleeding.

You tell him to hold the cloth and apply pressure on it while you get some bandages, a basin of water, and some small bandages for the cuts, rushing back to the living room you tell Schlatt to take off the cloth and went to wrap the bandages on his arm.

His clothes were torn taking note to give him spare clothes to change in hoping you have something for him to actually change in, you get the bloodied cloth and get another clean cloth to rinse in the water and begin tending to the smaller cuts starting on the ones on his face, not noticing the way Schlatt tenses up in your touch as you finish cleaning them up you get the bandages from you lap you move to put them on top of his smaller cuts, a knee in between his legs you focus on his cuts rather than the hand on your hip.

Finishing you put a hand on his shoulder and stood up to go to your bedroom and fondle with the clothes inside your closet, it was silent in the house not knowing what to say to each other.

Finding something you walk back to the living room and give the clothes to him "You can change out of these and I'll see what I can do to repair your clothes or I could just get you new ones." "..Okay."

You go to the kitchen and grab to bowls and spoons and pour soup into the bowls, walking over to the couch you sit next to him and give him the soup and spoon then begin to eat your portion.

It was silent but it has always been silent in your home breaking the silence "So, how have you been?" you ask him he doesn't respond and just shoves a spoon in his mouth you sigh and let it go was he always this stubborn with answering questions?

Both of you finish the soup you take the bowl from him and stalk forward to your kitchen.

"You can stay here for a while, sir." You say, silence, sighing you guess that your job of being the President's secretary isn't finished yet.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Hello! This is the second part of President's secretary, I wanted to end it with smut but I will post a 3rd part with possible smut.

Anyways, Like my writing? consider giving me a follow;)

[matchamauler]

audio 😊👌😃