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hagio moto

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don’t forget the songs that made you cry

and the songs that saved your life

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L I G H T

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about the Manhwa (Yeonmo), isn't there any other way for people to bought the manhwa? like the scanlation team stop at vol 8. Any opinion how we can read the ending? //sorryforsuddenlyasking

Hi. If you can read Chinese it is completely translated in that language. I haven’t read it myself but here’s the link: http://www.dm5.com/manhua-lianmu/

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Wish this was me today.

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“She wanted, passionately and persistently, two things which she believed should subsist together in any well-ordered life: amusement and respectability.” - Edith Wharton, The Custom of the Country

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Washington Square (1880)

This was my first Henry James novel. It seemed easy enough to read on the go, but then I realized it was much better to read it in the privacy of my own room because I found many parts of this novel extremely humorous. Much of it comes from the heroine’s father’s wry and sardonic remarks about the state of affairs of his family members, all of which are objectively true. I’ve never read something that had so much of this delicious sarcasm without being too verbose or pretentious.

Life is ironic. It’s better to find humor in its ups and downs. Too much frankness and cynicism is not a good thing however. It destroyed the admiration a daughter had for her brilliant father in this novel. It doesn’t help that his contempt/dissatisfaction of having a daughter not in any way similar to his late wife sometimes seeps through.

We tend to find dysfunctional families (especially when they meddle in relationships) entertaining to watch because we see a lot of our own experiences in them, but through their imperfections, they also come with their fair share of grief and lifelong damage. We all tend to have love-hate relationships with our families. They also hold power over us through our sense of filial duty. It is not uncommon for us to blame our family for how we ended up in life. This is the tragedy inherent in all this comedy.

Despite this story being set more than a hundred years ago, I find the heroine, Catherine Sloper’s, predicament still very much relatable. It is very hard to reconcile wanting to do something because you believe in it all the while knowing that your only parent disapproves of it because it’s the dumbest decision you could ever make. I find that one of the main conflicts for the reader is how we want Catherine to finally stand on her own two feet and make the decision she believes in, however, we also know that this decision of hers is not the right thing. Still, there is value in making your own decisions and learning from your mistakes, even though some mistakes can ultimately lead to ruin. Sure, the cynic, educated in the ways of the world, could laugh at romance all he wants, with all its craziness and irrationality, but these qualities don’t always make the experience of it wrong.

Popular culture dictates that when a story starts with an average-looking girl, she usually gets the handsome guy and the nice lifestyle in the end. Washington Square makes this a little more complicated by making the average (or in this case, dull and undesirable) girl rich and the handsome guy she likes, Morris Townsend, an unemployed gold-digger. It looks like a great romcom plot, but in such a family where you make such a great effort to prove yourself, only for your grand decision to fall apart in the end through no fault of your own, it’s not easy to go back while knowing your father is sitting there thinking “I told you so.” It is not easy to “follow your heart and your happiness” only for it to lead nowhere and to also be an ungrateful daughter in the process.

And this is where Catherine, someone who her father thought was too stupid and too weak to make any good decisions, and someone who Morris thought he could easily sweet talk into marrying him, begins to show her strength. She goes all the way with her decision to choose her engagement over her father and doesn’t grovel or show any weakness in front of him when it doesn’t work out. She proves to everyone that she is fine, all the while still living with her father, remembering that he had exerted so much control over her life at one point in time and that her aunt had meddled excessively with her previous relationship.

In the end, as her father is near death, she still does not promise him that she will not marry her gold-digging ex. Even though she knows she won’t give Morris a second chance even after twenty years, she still wants the freedom to make any decision she wants without someone preventing her from doing it for his sake, regardless of whether that person is her beloved father.

We don’t know exactly why she doesn’t marry nor “love” anyone ever again. She, perhaps, like she has done during the latter half of the novel, stood by the decision to be independent. Perhaps she knew that there was once a chance for love that was ruined and there never will be one again that would matter as much.

We never really know whether she feels fulfilled being alone nor if she actually is lonely. While the novel for the most part, has given a tragic event some levity, by reframing it and making it reflect life’s ironies instead, I don’t really see a positive spin with its ending. Morris gets dumped and whether or not Catherine gains satisfaction from that doesn’t really matter because I see it as Catherine going to back to what she was doing before he came knocking on her door, which is neither sad, happy, nor even empty. It is simply life. (Although she has also acquired her father’s cold rationality and deadpan delivery.)

All in all, I can say that the time I spent reading this book were a few hours that were more than well-spent! It’s pretty unusual for me to feel rather giddy and excited to read something “literary.”  And the prose is oh so brilliant!

Now I don’t understand how I’ve taken nearly 10 classes in the English literature department and never read any Henry James.

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Luz, Oscuridad, Luz

(All About Lily Chou Chou)

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There’s a place in the soul where you’ve never been wounded.

Meister Eckhart (via siriusc)

Is there really though?

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I am eternally, devastatingly romantic, and I thought people would see it because ‘romantic’ doesn’t mean ‘sugary.’ It’s dark and tormented — the furor of passion, the despair of an idealism that you can’t attain.

Catherine Breillat  (via thatkindofwoman)

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Yamada Akihiro

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Another weekend

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There’s a difference between a philosophy and a bumper sticker.

Charles M. Schulz (via darkandstormynite)

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sound will bring me home again

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Films

I spent the last few months doing a lot of traveling since my boyfriend was leaving for graduate school in the United States (basically the other side of the world) and we wanted to spend as much time as possible and make the most of the free time he had left.

Thanks to in-flight entertainment systems, I've been able to find out about films that never got much publicity where I live. Here's a quick review of some of them!

Far from the Madding Crowd - 8/10 I never read the Thomas Hardy novel so I can't comment on whether the film manages to capture the essence of the source material. I find that for a story that seems to focus at first on how a headstrong 19th century woman challenges societal mores by choosing to live on her own terms and tries to live the way men do (as the head of the family and a farm, answering to no one, and also willing to do the dirty work, and as untamed as the nature that surrounds her), it lacks "spirit". She gets the idea that she would only be with someone who manages to tame her wildness (obviously not as wild by today's standards), and thus ends up with someone who does not respect as much as the other men she led on. There could be reason for why this happens. When one is given a wide array of choices, there is always the chance that she'll make the wrong one. Choosing a partner isn't just a purely practical decision anymore  nor does anyone have to marry someone. I'm not really sure what to think of the film. It portrays the tragedy that befalls one who makes the wrong choice, who act out of passion, but also gives the viewers a happy ending (that honestly wasn't that happy. More like a relief.)

Carey Mulligan has a face the camera loves but in the last 2 films I’ve seen her in, she was playing a character that I found unlikable and difficult. She does make tasteful film choices though.

Testament of Youth - 9.5/10 A film about coming-of-age during the outbreak of World War I and is based on a memoir. Nothing much to say about it except that hits the right notes, and the lead actress gives a fantastic performance. One of the best films I’ve seen in the last few years.

Hot Road - 9/10 I have to admit, I haven't read the manga yet but I do know it is highly regarded for its style. This film is quiet and tense. It's all about unembellished emotion with a sense of careful restraint and nuanced performances from the actors. There is something stunning about how the film's themes are manifested in the film's setting on the open road at night. It's much more than a love story or a tale of troubled youth. It's about making sense of powerful emotions like anger and loneliness.

Strobe Edge - 7/10 It's a decent adaptation that captures the charm of the manga, however, given the time constraints, moves through events too quickly for the story to be believable. From what I recall, pacing was one of the things that made Strobe Edge the enjoyable, reflective experience that it was as a manga.

Poison Berry in my Brain - Ehh... Well, I have been reading this manga on and off. I actually started reading it because I kept seeing the movie’s promotional posters everywhere in Japan while I was traveling there a few months ago.

I find that it's too rushed to the point where the main premise (girl who overthinks everything gets into hilarious, awkward, and terrible situations) becomes an afterthought. I don't find it as funny nor as interesting. Maybe I'll give it another try?

I guess this is the difficulty of reviewing films after reading the source material first. Manga tends to dwell on thoughts and emotions whereas films tend to be more event-driven. It's probably why Hot Road lends itself pretty well to a live action adaptation since it's largely about the impact of actions and words.

However, after having watched it, I find that while the film balances quietness with the flooding of emotions, there’s a lot about it that is much like the act of reading a manga where the images and words are all there but the emotional quality is reliant on interpretation from the reader’s side.