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 “hi welcome to mcdonalds what can i get for you?”

“yeah can i get a deluxe quarter pounder with cheese?”

“absolutely, do you want the meal or just the sandwich?’

“uuuuuh hold on”

*fishes something out of my pocket*

“mikey what do i do?”

“get the fries. youll need the energy in the coming days”

*stuffs it back in my pocket*

“uhh yes please  the meal would be great”

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I hate having a cold and being stuffy but my god do I love to Neti Rinse and watch nasty snot goobers fall out of my nose. It’s so satisfying

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what's the first movie you remember seeing in theaters? don't try and be all edgy and cool and say like tetsuo: the iron man. be honest.

Go!!

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Feeling better but not 100%, so here's a photo from a couple of weeks ago I wasn't planning on posting.

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I’m gonna assume all of the people who liked this want to see it 👀

I took a nude of me and my hard c*ck today that I think came out very hot

I’d post it but it’ll get flagged in 0.2 seconds

[morally-corrupt-faye-resnick]

I took a nude of me and my hard c*ck today that I think came out very hot

I’d post it but it’ll get flagged in 0.2 seconds

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テストステロン (𝖳𝖾𝗌𝗍𝗈𝗌𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗈𝗇𝖾) 𝖮𝖭𝖠 𝖢𝗈𝗅𝗅𝖾𝖼𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇 𝖮𝖢-𝟤𝟩𝟥

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sitting pensively by the sea

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sitting pensively by the sea

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does anyone have the horrible photoshop recreation of Florida with the half rainy sky and the Publix and the muscovy duck crossing the construction zone please I'm begging

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Ah these children who always create problems for poor mothers....

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