"you make me wanna kill myself just for the fucking fun" the name's Soda | 20+ | any pronouns | vent blog | tw: just about everything really
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My mum: when I die
Me: not if I kill myself first then you can die with the crippling guilt of treating your daughter like utter shit!!!!!! :)
#vent#tw sui ideation#tw sui implied#bpd vent#actually bpd#bpd#borderline personality disorder#whatever its not like anything i ever do matters to anyone anyway so why not just end it all ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#my parents will start playing the blame game and nothing will ever be resolved#but thats okay i wont be alive to deal with it anymore ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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backshots this, backshots that, i would like to be taken out back and shot
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"everything will be alright" yeah maybe after I die
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Sorry for having symptoms of a mental illness I literally told you I have it will happen again
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“your trauma doesn’t define you” no actually it does. it dictates every aspect of my shitty life.
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Nobody apologized for how they treated me they just blamed me for how I reacted
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#vent#seeing my peers moving into their own places and being reminded how behind I am compared to everyone else#it makes me feel like such shit man.#I'm stuck with a family that doesn't give a fuck about me with no money#no job and nowhere else to go to get away from them#idk anymore. i have nothing.#all of my dreams have fallen through#i have no hope of ever owning anything#im just going to be confined to a box room with hardly enough space for anything under a roof with a ''''family'''' that treats me like shit#i wish i was never born#i wish my fucking parents never met each other and got married then maybe i would have a better life#than whatever the fuck this is#i want to drop dead#im a failure and nothing will EVER change that#stupid Soda for ever believing in yourself in the first place#no wonder I got abused. they saw how fucking pathetic I was. nothing i ever do is appreciated nor does it amount to anything.#hopefully i die soon and find peace in another life rather than this one
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I feel so empty.
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