motdsgn

[motdsgn]

a tangerine and a strawberry ✨

[motdsgn]

A tiny That That Yoongi 💜

This is the art style I normally use. Ever since I started, it has been evolving into something that can represent me through illustration.

[motdsgn]

I've been writing a BTS fanfic since 2020... It went through many changes, from being set in a Cyberpunk-esque Seoul, to being now set in a non-descript era (modern day but not exactly modern day), and more changes I lost count.

In January, after realizing I had no idea where the storyline was heading, I started writing a detailed outline to understand what I wanted it to be, separated between my main 3 characters (Jimin, Yoongi, and Jungkook). In my opinion, the storyline finally makes sense, however, there's one thing that stops me from publishing it: the topics it covers are heavy.

Ever since I first conceived the plotline, I knew it was going to be heavy. Tackling topics ranging from substance and s*xu*l abuse, mental illness, p*d*r*sty rings, strong social inequality, abuse of power. The amount of time I've spend researching how to properly tackle this topics without romanticization, the damage and how it affects societies and individuals alike.

Since the beginning, I knew I wanted it to be uncomfortable and raw.

That's where my current problem lies: I'm wary about publishing it. Doesn't matter how much care I place into tagging it correctly, there will always be people that are unable to understand and separate fiction from reality; despite the warnings, they still open the story and then blame the author, even if said author wrote disclaimers and trigger warnings.

As of now, I've been thinking about writing it solely for myself (and a friend that has been rooting ever since I started writing it), but at the same time, I want others to read it too because, despite the grim topics it touches, there's also a story of growth, of not losing hope even if life seems to be against you.

A Twitter mutual even suggested posting it on Patreon, keeping locked the heaviest chapters. But I'm still thinking about how can I proceed with it.

For me, it has been cathartic, to transform my feelings and trauma into words, a way for healing, but I don't know how it'll be for others.

[motdsgn]

Then we grew a little and romanticized the time I saw flowers in your hair

My socials 🍃

[motdsgn]

Can I take you to a moment where the fields are painted gold

My socials 🍃

[motdsgn]

if I give you pretty flowers

My socials 🍃