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"Um, do you care for him? You're romantically inclined toward this person."

9-1-1 -> 8x06 Confessions // 8x09 Sob Stories

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a good boy

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Mom and Dad think I'm a total loser, and I'm not, Maddie. I'm not, okay? (insp)

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Helena. He was your baby. Your baby first. Your first baby. And you took. His baby from him. You took your baby’s baby. You took him away. And are rubbing it in his face. That is not your baby. Your baby is in front of you but you won’t recognize that he is your baby because you made him your coparent. Ramon said your baby was the man of the house, and you made him the man of the house. And then you took his baby from him.

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something something Eddie being the clearest voice in his head that he uses to try to calm himself down amongst all the overlapping instances of Gerrard berating him something something

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Eddie Diaz in 9-1-1 | BUZZKILL (8.01)

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Oliver Stark as Evan "Buck" Buckley 9-1-1, S08E01 - Buzzkill

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#Alexa play Firestarter by The Prodigy

9-1-1 (2018-) ★ S08E01 ★ Buzzkill

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Dame Maggie Smith

1934-2024

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9-1-1 (2.01) | UNDER PRESSURE

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Okay, so I saw a tweet earlier about the donor arc, the look on Buck's face when he first holds that child and how he has to steel himself to hand over that baby to Kameron.

And I'm on my bullshit today, because it's such a cruel writing choice for Buck as a character. Because this man is so fearful of people leaving him, he cannot handle rejection, and a baby can't do either of those things... so Buck has to do it for them. Be the one to leave this time. What a knife to the gut! And sure, if Buck really wanted to be a donor, he could be a donor. But to not only make him a donor to a former friend/roommate (and let's be honest, Connor had to have been a crush, he followed that boy from Peru to LA), someone he personally knows is raising a child that is biologically his, to then having the woman carrying this child who will be the mother of this child give birth at his apartment, on his couch, and he is the one to deliver the baby and the first one to hold them. And you expect me to believe that Buck just moved on from that? That he didn't feel every single second of that deep in his soul?

That man is still thinking about that baby.

He wants a family. And he's been subconsciously building one with Eddie, he's co-parenting Chris. But that is never explicitly stated or talked about. He doesn't have a relationship with the Buckley parents. He only has Maddie. Bobby has been mentioned as a father figure in a few instances, but they have not recognized that to each other. And you want me to believe that Buck would move on from holding his own baby in his arms?

No, I don't buy it.

Buck could never be a "donor, not dad" with that much personal connection. Kameron was living in his loft at the end of her pregnancy! The lines are so blurred, they don't even exist anymore! The only way he could have successfully had a donor arc was if it was anonymous.

So, give me the fic. The fic where Buck grieves that loss of family. Where he still grieves it after s7, because Chris is gone, and it feels kind of similar. There's barely any contact, if any at all, and someone else is raising your kid.

Because Buck thinks about that baby.

He always will.

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Imma need at least one scene of Captain “they wanted me straighten things out around here” Gerrard getting schooled on regulations by Firefighter Evan “just give me a clipboard and I become the biggest pain in the ass but I’m doing it by the book to a T so there’s nothing you can do about it” Buckley.

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Bucks tells Eddie he lost Christopher in the tsunami / Eddie realizing Buck wasn’t able to convince Christopher to stay

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#I think Buck deserves Bobby to call him his son in front of him (insp by this gifset)

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9-1-1 (2018–) | 7.10 'ALL FALL DOWN'

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MADDIE HAN

Maddie Han

Maddie Han