mountainsatellite

[mountainsatellite]

[ID: a rough doodle of a grimacing person, labelled "me," opening a bottle of sparkling cider, labelled "cider that apparently got shookened." the bottle shoots a blast of cider, labelled "Beam Attack," at a cat, labelled "gertrude."]

[mountainsatellite]

I just got described as an "ad hating commie" by someone because I said a minute of youtube ads is unpleasant. fully spent 5 minutes arguing and defending youtube ads. insane stuff

[mountainsatellite]

guy who does unboxing videos but he only talks about the boxes

[mountainsatellite]

on Planet Where Everyone Can Teleport the first person on the moon went there by accident and promptly died. The next dozen or so people also went by accident, and also died. Number 14 figured out that people who go to the moon die and very cleverly brought a sword and six weeks of travel rations. This did not help.

No one on Planet Where Everyone Can Teleport ever figured out why people die in space because they don’t need airplanes and never found it particularly interesting to climb tall mountains. Astronomers use telescopes to take pictures of the ever-growing pile of corpses on the moon.

[mountainsatellite]

[mountainsatellite]

Our Japanese class found it funny that in common terminology "food" isn't very distinguished from specifically "rice" until it was pointed out to us that in English "meal" is "loose roughly ground grain"

[mountainsatellite]

let’s hang on mama (of another species)

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every night I think “wow this might be the night I go to bed early” and every time without fail I fuck it up

[mountainsatellite]

things the tolkien biopic needs to include:

tolkien being such a bad driver edith refused to ride in the car with him driving

young tolkien and edith dropping sugar cubes on the heads of passerby from the second story of a tea room

tolkien and lewis going to a non-costume party dressed as polar bears

tolkien almost ending his friendship with lewis because he hated santa claus making an appearance in narnia so much

tolkien’s entire writing group except for lewis fucking hating his writing because of all the elves

literally everyone hating going for walks with tolkien because he would stop and stare at every tree he passed for like 20 minutes

tolkien owning a goblet with the black speech (that he made up) on it and refusing to drink out of it because it’s an “accursed language”

tolkien inventing the “one ring to rule them all” verse while in the bathtub and jumping out

tolkien dressing up as an anglo saxon warrior and chasing his neighbors down the street with an axe

tolkien entering the room shouting beowulf in old english at his students the first day of classes

tolkien convincing his class that leprechauns were real

tolkien stealing a city bus while attending oxford and taking his friends for a joy ride

tolkien being a savage replying to a letter from the nazis

tolkien hating the beatles with a passion and refusing to let them make a lotr movie

tolkien hating his crazy american fans and calling them his “deplorable cultus”

“jirt”

[mountainsatellite]

i hate when top wildlife predators are just lil babies teeny tiny babies

[mountainsatellite]

Learning a new language by watching period dramas, my friend says I’m doing a good job but I should stop talking like a scheming royal harem concubine

[mountainsatellite]

Delicate ‘Knit’ Glass Sculptures by Carol Milne

[mountainsatellite]

beavers have the lifestyle that most children dream of. dig and travel through underwater canals. dam a river and flood the local woodlands. stomp mud into dam to seal. swim to flooded trees and destroy them. live in a secret hideout with a underwater entrance. full ownership over an engineering project

[mountainsatellite]

”Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Do people energize you or drain you? Would you rather be at a party or a library?” Stop subscribing me to binaries. Social interaction is invigorating and makes my life better and I’m exhausted the whole time.

[mountainsatellite]

A selection of Blooper sprites over the years.

[mountainsatellite]

some of my best friends i met at the devil’s sacrament

[mountainsatellite]

idk i just really want everyone to know about the word vermiculation