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CHEATING AND MAGNETISM

Cheaters cheat themselves the most. There are multiple ways of cheating and a variety of situations to be cheated. It is common for people to cheat in relationships, which normally leaves one partner full of distrust and upset. Other people cheat on challenging activities like sports or test taking. The problem with this type of cheating is that it often robs the cheater of learning. Cheaters who get caught cheating in sports or tests normally are reprimanded in some sort of way. Perhaps they are kicked off the team or sent to the principal’s office. When people cheat in their intimate relationships they typically end up with drama, stress, anxiety, fights, and loss. They generally lose the person that they cheated on. They may also lose the person that they cheated with. Cheating is the human way of trying to get what you want without all of the effort. It’s the easy way out. Cheaters in athletics may think to themselves “so long as no one noticed (during the game) that I was able to prevent that shot by nudging the basketball shooter below the belt, then it’s fine.” How wonderful it feels to receive a perfect grade on an exam despite the fact that all you did was copy your buddy’s answers.

Cheating also occurs in the financial world. We’ve all heard about the con artists who swindle loads of money from innocent retirees. They can look people straight in the eyes, tell a lie about investments, and continue with their sinister agenda. Overall, cheating is not easy. It is a learned and perfected skill. It is a competence that several people master.

Those who have been cheated, regardless of whether it was in a relationship or financially, feel a sense of loss. They lose a piece of wholesome trust, within themselves and others. These individuals may ask themselves why they weren’t wiser to recognize the cheater’s actions or dishonest intent. In relationships, people fall into depression wondering what it was that the other person had that they don’t have which enticed their partner to cheat. They may even question their own self-worth. Simply put, it hurts to be cheated on. The pain runs extra deep when you genuinely love the cheater.

It usually takes some time to heal and recover after being cheated on. Some people carry that experience into their subsequent relationships and interactions, never fully trusting their new partner. Others are stronger and find a way to release the experience from within themselves. These people choose to forgive the cheater and themselves. They choose to be grateful for the experience because they learned a great deal from it. They push ahead in a healthier and wiser frame of mind. Interestingly, cheaters also learn from the experience. Many attempt to reconcile with the person that they cheated. Normally, it is far too late for a reconciliation or to make amends and the person (who was cheated on) has no desire to get back into any sort of relationship with the cheater. Other times, the person may give the cheater the benefit of the doubt only to discover that the cheating behavior repeats. Of course, there are instances where the cheater truly repents for their prior behavior and does not cheat again after reconciliation. However, those instances are far fewer than repeat cheating.

The behavior of cheating often stems from the fact that the cheater has a void/desire to fill within themselves or their situation. There is something within them that triggers them to cheat. Perhaps they need attention, money, love, intimacy, communication, or they simply need an ego boost. Keep in mind that cheating is a choice. The person has decided to cheat instead of putting forth the effort and “playing by the rules.”

As a survivor of cheating, I advise others who have been cheated to release the emotions from the experience. Forgive yourself for not recognizing the signs or purposely ignoring them. Forgive the cheater(s) for their actions in this lifetime. Realize that they had internal “demons” or voids to tackle which led them to the deceitful behavior.

Cheaters believe that proper cheating will go unnoticed. So long as no one knows, then no one gets hurt. Cheaters weigh the options of honesty and deception. People that choose honesty work hard. They put forth the effort to mend relationship issues. They train consistently to be able to perform well in sports. Students study laboriously to ensure that they’ve learned the material adequately to do well on the exam/quiz/assignment. Conversely, cheaters make the conscious choice to deceive. They focus on short term gratification without considering the potential consequences if they get caught. It’s more of an impulsive action. The problem with impulse is that it can lead to dire consequences. Gamblers learn this the hard way. There are many gamblers who are masterful cheaters, but when they are caught the outcome is usually very severe.

In sports, cheating can be done by the athletes, managers, coaches, judges, owners, or teams. Cheating in sports causes pure distrust. This type of cheating is generally driven by the rewards that are at stake. For example, in a championship competition the push to win is much higher. Who doesn’t want to be involved in winning a championship? There may be financial stakes involved in sports as well, which can trigger owners, managers, judges, and teams to cheat. Several games have been “fixed” to help ensure the cheaters get their way.

I have experienced both…being cheated on by another and being the one who cheats. They both suck. Being cheated on makes you feel horrible. It messes with your self-confidence, self-worth, self-esteem, self-trust, and makes you depressed. You question what it is that the other person had that you don’t have that would drive your lover go for them instead of stay loyal to you. You wonder why the other person is the better choice. Was I not attractive enough? Was I not good enough in bed? Was I not loving enough? And on and on those types of questions zoom around in your brain when you have been a victim of cheating (in a relationship).

On the other hand, when you are the one doing the cheating, it can be stressful. Sometimes you have to juggle two or more partners at the same time, while keeping each blind to one another. Keeping those extra relationships hidden, for me, was the most challenging part. You didn’t want to get caught, but at the same time you didn’t want to give up either relationship or commit to only one of them. They each provided parts of what I was needing/wanting at the time. I can only speak from my own experience, but when I cheated in the past it was mainly driven by my need to feel desired and wanted. The new person always made me feel attractive and desirable. The new person tended to be more exciting than my existing partner. My current relationship was stale, it was comfortable, and it lacked the spark that the new relationship offered.

Here’s my story: I was desperately in need of attention and validation when I was younger. I dressed very scantily. I knew that I was young and had an incredible body. I was blessed. Yet, I needed men to drool over me for me to feel attractive. I knew that I was attractive, but for some reason I didn’t feel that I was. I needed men to prove to me that I was attractive by showing their desires for me. Even though I was attracting men for the wrong reason, I didn’t care at the time. Deep down I wanted a stable and loving relationship, but instead I projected this sexy lady magnet image. That image only brought me men who wanted me for my body and nothing more. Lots of females fall into this trap. They attract the players. These players are drawn to them because they are exposing the right amount of skin, wearing the tight and short clothing that calls a player to action. For some reason the gals feel the need to showcase their wonderful bodies to attract men, but that doesn’t attract the type of men that they really want. A handsome, smooth talking, great smelling, well dressed player who has no interest in a long-term relationship (aka cheater) most likely will not be the loyal, honest, loving, and committed partner that you seek. Basically, be very conscious of the image that you put out there because you will inevitably attract that same thing back to you.

In order to attract a stable man who is grounded enough in himself to be able to love and provide for another human being (his partner) or beings (his family), we women need to exude that same energy. We must be secure in who we are. We must know without a shadow of doubt that we are valuable, worthy, confident, successful, loving, and grounded. We can only be magnets for what we are attracting (magnetizing). So, if you are a woman or man who finds themselves always attracting an unhealthy type of relationship, instead of placing blame on the other person, look within yourself to reveal what magnetism you are projecting that is obviously attracting these wrong types to you. At that point work to change your inner magnetism. If you are attracting cheaters, look within yourself to see if you are afraid of commitment. If so, why are you afraid of committing? Maybe you are attracting cheaters because you are seeking validation through attraction (like I was) from those that are merely playing the field. Find a way to boost your own self-image to simply KNOW that you are attractive without needing others to desire you as a means of proving it to yourself. Perhaps you are attracting cheaters to you because you need a certain level of stress or drama in your life. You might be accustomed to the cheating dynamic (it is your base of familiar). If this is the case, then dive deeper into why you need that kind of chaos in your life and whether it truly brings you contentment.

There are many different reasons why we attract the people and situations that we do into our lives. This is particularly true for intimate relations. In the end know that you can attract the type of partner that you want when you emit the magnetic pull for those traits. That starts and ends with you having and being those exact same traits. When you are calm and peaceful, you will attract more calm and peace to your life. There is always the instance of opposites attract. Yes, you may be a calm and peaceful person, yet attract a hyper and exciting adventure seeker into your life. Opposites attracting is the simple case of us wanting to be around someone who has traits that we wish we had more of. Someone who is quiet and bashful may find themselves attracted to someone who talks a lot and has outstanding conversational skills. There are plenty of opposite types of relationships that work, and there are plenty that fail. The point here is you need to become CRYSTAL CLEAR on what you want in a mate. Then and only then can you start to emit those magnetic energies out so that the type of person you seek can cross your path. What are your must haves and must not haves in a mate? Make a list of all the physical and behavioral traits that you want in a mate. Then make a similar list of all the traits that they should not possess. Focus on these lists and add to them as new thoughts pop into your head. Likewise, make a list of all the traits that you currently need to work on within yourself to bring this person into your life, meaning how can you attract a mate who embodies your desires? Realize that you may not get an exact match, and there may be a few traits that were on your must not have list that the person does come with. At that point you’ll have to decide if those traits are a deal breaker for you.

Your choices in life are all yours. No one should be making your decisions for you once you are a fully functional adult. Own your decisions, good and bad. Learn from your bad choices. This is particularly true in relationships. Ask yourself what new knowledge you gained from having had the experience? How will you apply this new knowledge to your future relationship(s)? You are the magnet, so be sure to magnetize the stuff and people that you TRULY need/want. Most of us are not consciously stating that we wish to attract a cheater, but we may be doing exactly that subconsciously! Calibrate your magnetism ahead of time by tapping into your inner self and doing a detailed self-evaluation. I have every faith that you can get your relationships on a healthy track once you do this. Attract the love and other fortunate situations that you deserve and need!

#cheating #mystical thoughts #relationship #magnetism #magnetic #trust #dishonesty #recovery #ego #void #mirror #attraction #drama #love

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