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i loveeeee time theft i love reading fanfiction and scrolling tumblr dot com on company time. everyone should do this btw

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Superman performing cpr on humans: *gently does it with one hand like u do on babies*

Superman performing CPR on Wonder Woman: *punch punch punch*

Justice League: A League of One

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I’d divorce him too lmao

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its always like be careful this song might become a memory. this cologne might become a memory. this brand of beer might become a memory. i time travel all the time

[nalivaa]

ENDLESS LIST OF FAVORITES ★ movies ↳ Lilo & Stitch (2002) dir. Chris Sanders, Dean DeBlois

"W-… waiting. For what? Family. Ah! You don't have one. I made you. Oh... Maybe I could… You're built to destroy. You can never belong."

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Improvise. Adapt. Overcome.

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unfortunately actually being productive and having a routine and leaving my house to be a person in the world and eating real meals consistently does improve my mental health which means i have to keep doing it except i have mental illness that makes me not do it so you see my dilemma

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Worst thing ever in the whole world is when a thunderstorm is forecasted and then it doesn’t storm. literally so rude I was excited for this all day.

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today I used the phrase "breasting boobily" in casual real life conversation and everyone was shocked asking how I came up with that and I had to explain it. ive been at the devil's sacrament so long that I forgot he wasn't god

[nalivaa]

switching to firefox is so funny to me because when chrome wanted an update i was beating it back with a stick but firefox is politely raising its hand and saying “hey there’s an update if you want” and i’m kissing that little fox on between its eyes and letting it update calmly and peacefully, go update baby i love you, take all the time you need

[nalivaa]

i love when blogs like @unyieldingsilence leave a spooky blank addition to a post and then the conversation just continues after that. bc i imagine the unyielding silence is trying to be threatening and ominous but tumblr ppl are just too chill to fall for it. the unyielding silence is like

“ ”

and we’re just like “yeah that’s a good point! and to add on….”

and the unyielding silence is like? a little put out by this at first because it wants to be scary and end conversations but over time it comes to know what it’s like to be loved and accepted for exactly who you are

[nalivaa]

You think Odysseus was Homer's favorite blorbo because of the amount of details he put in his descriptors. I think Odysseus was Homer's favorite blorbo because of the absolute hell he put him through. You cannot convince me that The Odyssey wasn't just someone going buck wild with their favorite oc—because that's exactly what it was.

[nalivaa]

Husband called me into the bedroom to show me the tag on our mattress cover, he was very proud.

“This seems like something tumblr will like! It’ll get you all the notes…ReTumbls? It’ll get you all the ReTumbls.”

[nalivaa]

ok typically what i do is i wear Not Home clothes when i'm out of the house and Home clothes when i'm in the house which also double as Asleep clothes but apparently nobody else on earth does this and that's super weird. please help me gather data points/settle an argument

not to panhandle for reblogs but this poll won't work unless someone reblogs it 🥺🥺🥺

[nalivaa]

“I call it Experiment 626. He is bulletproof, fireproof, and can think faster than super computer. He can see in the dark and move objects three thousand times his size. His only instinct — to destroy everything he touches!”

[nalivaa]