neokingghidorah

[neokingghidorah]

*first time using gay slang* you look like you're wearing a wig!! and you look like a cunt!!!

[neokingghidorah]

can I come over and dodge roll into all your breakable furniture

[neokingghidorah]

if mario was trapped in a cave for generations he would gradually become pale and lose his eyes and start hunting for fish and centipedes by sonar but he wouldnt lose his overalls or hat

[neokingghidorah]

what to do with a drunken sailor site:reddit.com

[neokingghidorah]

Instead of crass and discriminatory "jokes", I prefer to get my chuckles from wholesome humor, such as: "my god, the scrimbly blumbo!" Hahahaha! Really, there's no need for slurs and put-downs when comedy like "skcrunklo bonglo bingo" is available! I am racist as fuck though,

[neokingghidorah]

cock rings? aren’t you gonna answer?

[neokingghidorah]

I just saw a DNI for "evil intentions". nobody puts up a warding talisman anymore just a fucking DNI

[neokingghidorah]

I plan on watching a movie at some point in the future

[neokingghidorah]

the clock app always picks the numbers for you but in calculator the numbers can be anything you want

[neokingghidorah]

[neokingghidorah]

Gf: I'm breaking up with you

Me: Motive's Misunderstanding ～ Confused Boy's Inquiry?!

Gf: It's the whole 'structuring every sentence like a touhou title' thing

Me: 東方零巫女 ～ Abandonment of All Lovers 😔

[neokingghidorah]

[neokingghidorah]

[neokingghidorah]

Fairytale Seinfeld. Elaine pretends to be mute to date a guy exclusively into mermaids. Jerry haggles for a parking space with Rumplestiltskin. George gets “Hansel and Gretled.” Kramer inherits magic beans.

[neokingghidorah]

[neokingghidorah]

i need to get into cars

[neokingghidorah]

You may think it cruel but when a white witch pisses me off I go through her etsy listings for native bird feathers and forward it to fish and wildlife services