nerdsimpwhodaydreams

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

10 year old Dick: "Bruce, when you get married, can I be the best man?"

Bruce: "Of course, chum."

---

12 year old Dick: "Hey Clark, do you think when you get married, I can be your best man?"

Clark: "I don't see why not."

---

25 year old Dick: "In my defence, I had no way of knowing you'd end up marrying each other."

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

Bruce has a strict 'no metas/powers (except duke) allowed in Gotham' policy in place but it has a clause, BYOR (Bring Your Own Robin)

No one is allowed entry untill and unless they can produce their very own certified robin-shaped identity card

Whenever someone with even a hint of supernatural powers in them arrives at Gotham, they're first met with Bruce standing at the city border with a notepad in hand

Bruce: State your name and purpose.

Kon: Kon-el, here to hangout!

Bruce: Your Robin?

Kon, flourishing Tim from behind him: Ta-Da!

Tim, waves: Hey Bruce

Bruce: Approved, you may enter

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Name and purpose?

Hal: Here to investigate a case, Hal Jordan

Bruce: Your Robin?

Hal: I.... don't have one?

Bruce: Denied

Hal: What?! But-

Bruce: Denied.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Yes, Wally, where's your robin?

Wally: Oh shit lemme just- *zaps away and returns with Dick, who was in the midst of brushing his teeth, in a bridal carry*- Here!

Bruce, grumbling a little: Fine. Approved.

Dick: You gotta stop using me as a key already, man

Wally: Blame Bruce.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Name and purpose?

Clark: Clark Kent, here for our monthly barbecue

Bruce: Robin?

Clark, producing an actual robin bird: Does this count?

Bruce:.....yes

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

#pet names are the best

idk this ones abt pet names i guess

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

#repost if you thought Damian was coming out as gay or bi

#damian is jonsexual in my headcanon

Teenage Damian: Father, I have something very important to tell you. Richard has assured me it will not change your view of me, and I am holding you to that.

Bruce, thinking another kid is coming out: of course Damian. You are my kid, that will not change

Damian: *nods and takes a deep breath*

Damian: As you are aware, there has been a concerning increase of bats and they have risked disturbing the signals and various memorabilia due to them

Damian: There are more that are flying or stationing themselves around lower to the ground, and I have overheard you and Gordon wondering if they are diseased or rabid.

Bruce, officially lost: hn

Damian: The reason there's been an uptick of bats inside the main part of the cave is due to me feeding and befriending them

Bruce:

Damian: They prefer kiwi and strawberries

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

Damian: *trying to comb his hair, getting increasingly frustrated because it's not laying straight*

Bruce: *gently pulling him closer to take over*

Bruce: Oh, you got my cowlicks. All seven of them.

Damian: I've always had trouble with my hair, and now im finding out that this is your fault >:(

Bruce: Hey if you're gonna blame anyone, it's probably your grandfather

Alfred: Actually, sir, it would be your mother

Bruce: You're kidding

Alfred: There is a reason she was very fond of hats

Damian: This bloodline is cursed.

Headcanon - Frustrating cowlicks run in the Wayne Family. Martha had them but it was less noticeable with her longer hair, but it's very noticeable with Bruce and Damian. Alfred had taught Bruce how to work with them at a young age, and now Bruce teaches Damian how to work with them and how he can style his hair around it (partially why he styles it so spiked and messy)

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

Mobile ads when I was young:

this is a 30 second ad which you can skip after 5 seconds

Mobile ads now:

we say this ad is 30 seconds but after this there are twenty two pop ups which will last for 5 seconds minimum. Oh and the x is a lie and every time you missclick I'll close the current application and open the play store. And after all the popups when you think it's over I'll show it one last time as a pop which will take you 10 tries to close

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

i love it when fish are like

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

#makelibrariesgayagain #MLGA #keeplibrariesgay

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

the concept and idea of “you can always start trying to be a better person” is extremely important to me both in media and irl and i continue to be deeply deeply disturbed by the trend on this site pushing that these ideas in media are bad writing or even morally reprehensible

because theyd rather someone stay terrible or just straight up die than become a better person 

from a compassionate point of view it’s deeply distressing and from a pragmatic point of view it’s outright frustrating

it’s fucked up. 

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

Chapters: 1/? Fandom: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), Teen Titans (Animated Series) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Tim Drake & Dick Grayson & Jason Todd & Bruce Wayne & Damian Wayne & Original Male Character(s), Bruce Wayne & Original Male Character(s), Alfred Pennyworth & Original Male Character(s), Dick Grayson/Wally West, Tim Drake/Kon-El | Conner Kent, Jonathan Kent/Damian Wayne Characters: Original Male Character(s), Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Original Child(ren) of Dick Grayson, Tim Drake (DCU), Damian Wayne, Duke Thomas, Stephanie Brown, Cassandra Cain, Alfred Pennyworth, Alfred the Cat (DCU), Barbara Gordon Additional Tags: Genderfluid Character, Age Regression/De-Aging, Lazarus Pit (DCU), One Big Happy Family, Fluff, Family Fluff, Adoption, Multiverse, Functional Batfamily (DCU), Romantic Fluff Summary:

[Trigger warning for suicide and mental health and if you are struggling with things of that nature you're not alone and please seek help or talk to someone]

After long deliberation and suffering in their miserable life, Val Rose decided to end their existence. But the universe didn't like that decision so they transported Them to a universe where Gotham is a real thing and The Waynes are an even more real thing.

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

#this is my new headcanon

#its so sad but at the end at least his family loves him now

In my mind Bruce was a low 21 when he adopted Dick. And Dick was 9. Bruce was a freaking teendad in my opinion,

The man had no idea what he was doing, how he was gonna do it, but he knew he had to take care of this kid because he knew he'd be in worse places otherwise.

Bruce did his best.

He did his freaking best even though he had no idea what he was doing. He lost his own parents so young that he knew he couldn't copy everything.

Even with Jason, Cass, he was still learning the ropes and was scared of screwing up. With, Tim, Steph, Duke, and Damian he had a bit more experience and was a bit more confident but he still doubted himself, so, so much.

Bruce did screw up sometimes. And he mentally beat himself up over it so many times. So, so many times. Tore out his hair. punched and punched and punched. Had countless sleepless nights, even after he's forgiven because deep down he'll never forgive himself.

Bruce wasn't an A+ parent as far as he saw it and he was so focused on the times he screwed up he forgot how he did better than some of the kids' bio parents.

Better than Willis Todd. Better than Arthur Brown. Better than David Cain. Better than the Drakes'.

Bruce gave up a lot for the kids whether he knows it or not.

And he was a freaking teendad.

It takes a while for the kids to realize this. Dick is the first, through small things until one day he's thinking and it hits him.

Jason is arguing with Bruce one day and sees the look in his dad's eyes. The guilt. At first he's glad to know that Bruce does regret the events in Ethiopia. Then he sees Bruce later, sitting with his head in his hands. And starts thinking. Notices the bruises across Bruce's knuckles and the battered punching bag he saw earlier.

Babs always knew. As does Cass.

Tim and Steph realize gradually over time and so does Duke. Damian gets it explained to him by Dick and Jason once he's older.

They let the man know that they're not mad (anymore, for some of them).

Because deep down, they know Bruce did his best even when he had no idea what he was doing.

One time with the Outlaws, Red Hood is helping with a hostage situation and as he helps a young man out of a holding cell, he goes 'geez how old are ya, kid?' and gets a weak '21' in reply.

At first Jason doesn't think much of it, other than how young the guy seems. More teen than adult.

Then he realizes as they finish the mission and spends ten minutes staring into the aether.

'Wasn't Dad 21 when he took Dick in?'

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

there is a voice inside my head that whispers “wing au” every time i join a new fandom. it is currently winning.

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

Dick: whatcha doing, Damian?

Damian: redesigning the Robin suit

Dick: oh like Tim? Gonna be your own version of Robin?

Damian, confused: no, I’ll still be Robin, just with a different suit.

The rest of the batfam appearing out of nowhere: NO!

Damian: Why not?

Jason: no one touches the Robin suit and still calls themselves Robin

Tim: off limits, even for you. The most modification ever been allowed were pants

Damian: that makes no sense

Bruce: The Robin outfit is sacred

Jason: and also Dick’s crying in the corner

Bruce: that too

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

Damian: So what’s for dinner?

Dick: I can’t tell you, it’s a soup-prise!

Damian: …

Damian: Is it soup?

Dick: I soup-pose it could be! *winks*

Damian: Please, enough with the soup puns!

Dick: Wow, you’re soup-per mean.

Damian: STOP!

*one hour later*

Damian: It’s tacos?!?!?!

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

Need everyone to see this variant cover by Kris Anka immediately

[nerdsimpwhodaydreams]

So mad at how long this took