nkygrl-blog

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Are We What We Focus On?

Why do so many of us find ourselves focusing on our mistakes, our regrets… the things that didn’t go right and the experiences that knocked us down? What about all the times we got it right? Don’t those matter just as much, if not more? We’d get a whole lot farther if we just dissected our success instead of our failures. I’m thinking that dissecting success will help re-calibrate you. It will…

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The Double-Edged Sword of Nostalgia

Hello, everyone… I’m 156 years old and I have been listening to post punk / alternative for 87 years, and this song, this song that found me via Mobland, has saved my life. This band is pure, raw talent. Please enjoy it along with this newest post. Down the Rabbit Hole Today I need to talk about taking off my rose-colored glasses. I have to remind myself to steer clear of magical thinking when…

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The Complexities of Identifying as a Cancer Survivor

From diagnosis day in August of 2023 others around me have been calling me a survivor. I have mixed feelings about this. So far, I’ve been through two surgeries, chemotherapy, radiation, and now I’m on my second aromatase inhibitor with a plethora of side effects that I struggle to cope with in my current everyday life. I took leave from work through the worst part of chemo and radiation from…

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Must-Watch Series for Breast Cancer Survivors

Re-visiting The Big C After I was diagnosed with breast cancer in the summer of 2023 I made a list of documentaries, movies, and series to watch that might give me comfort, insight, and inspiration as I went through the journey, along with all the medical reading that was recommended for my particular diagnosis. It’s in my nature to research, understand, and plan my way out of things myself. But…

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Embracing the Christmas Spirit: Yuletide

Happy First Day of Christmas I have been feeling somewhat Grinch-y this year. This season snuck up on me too quickly, startling me how fast it’s come. Maybe it’s the year and a half with the blanket of cancer that has been my companion. Maybe it’s my thoughts of the Christmases gone that will never be again. A half century has dissolved into the annals of time – of family, faith, and celebration…

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Does Cold Weather Really Make You Sick?

It’s seems like every year I get into a conversation about seasonal illnesses that crop up this time of year. My mom used to say things like “you’ll catch your death out in that cold” and “bundle up so you don’t get sick.” Are these just wives tales or is there something to it? I recently had a conversation with my sister, who is a nurse. She is adamant that being in the cold does not make you…

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Surviving Holiday Stress: A Guide for the Grinch in All of Us

The holidays are supposed to be a time of joy, peace, and goodwill. But for some of us, they can also be a source of stress, anxiety, and frustration. Whether it’s the pressure of finding the perfect gifts, the hassle of traveling, the awkwardness of family gatherings, or the unrealistic expectations of social media, the holidays can make us feel more like a grinch than a saint. But don’t worry,…

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The Magic of Ordinary Days

I’ve been in nesting mode. I get this way every year as Indian summer ebbs into fall. My thoughts meander. Maybe my real happy ending is falling in love with the simplest parts of life – savoring that first sip of morning decaf, losing myself in the stillness of an October sunrise, or smelling freshly baked bread (before I remember carbs are a no-go for me). It’s driving down a familiar road…

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Destin 2024: They Joy Between Francine and Helene

Ah, traveling – the art of packing your life into a suitcase and hoping you didn’t forget the charger. It’s the universal quest for selfies in front of famous landmarks and the relentless pursuit of ‘authentic experiences’ that look great on Instagram. But what is the best thing about traveling? Is it the food, the people, the sights? Nope. It’s the stories you come back with, the kind that start…

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(via Ethical Life Hacks: Wise Advice for Better Relationships and Etiquette)

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Ethical Life Hacks: Wise Advice for Better Relationships and Etiquette

A sage of silliness once proclaimed some wise advice not for fools. Here’s some advice from wise women past and present (me), courtesy distilled and curated: Ringing someone’s phone off the hook? If they don’t answer by the third jingle, they’re probably busy saving the world – or taking a really long nap. Stop calling. They’ll call you back. Or not. Borrowed some cash? Return it faster than a…

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(via Reflective Moments: A Poem of Profound Redemption and Friendship)

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Reflective Moments: A Poem of Profound Redemption and Friendship

Author Note: I originally wrote this poem in 2004 for a significant person that was in my life when I was in my early twenties. That relationship fundamentally impacted my life across the spectrum in profound ways. I learned of his passing last year as I was dealing with the beginning of my illness before my diagnosis with breast cancer. I hope that you, dear readers, enjoy the traverse down this…

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The Crone Redefined: GenX Rebellion Against Aging Stereotypes

Dudes and Dudettes, it’s so weird to be thinking about / being in the empty nest, retirement, and beyond. But here we are. Most of us have been too busy getting things done and having fun to even think about slowing down. We’ve survived so far, so let’s GenX this thing the way only we can. I don’t know about you but I’m in no hurry to put on the cloak of invisibility as a woman of a certain age.…