nochruch-inthewild

[nochruch-inthewild]

[nochruch-inthewild]

be beautiful…

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katie daisy

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THE CAST OF EVERYTHING EVERYWHERE ALL AT ONCE wins Cast in a Motion Picture at the 2023 Screen Actors Guild Awards

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dystopian past times

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Keep choosing love.

[nochruch-inthewild]

You are worth it. Stop. Say it as many times as you need to.

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[nochruch-inthewild]

[nochruch-inthewild]

05/09/2020

Depression sure has a way of creeping up.

I feel like it’s a constant battle to be okay, to survive.

I’m fighting to survive just to end up going nowhere. My life is such a waste. I’m stuck. I want to do better but I can’t.. that’s so fucking pathetic.

My brain feels so foggy.

I just want to be happy. I want to be able to reflect on a day and say “wow today was a good, happy day” .. I haven’t had one of those in so long.

[nochruch-inthewild]

[nochruch-inthewild]

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🌸

[nochruch-inthewild]

My life currently:

It feels like I have been attempting to get my life together for as long as I can remember. One of my biggest insicurities has always been my weight. I have attempted things before but always end up going back to overeating and binging.

It’s so difficult to put in words everything that has been going on but in short, I am on week three of this new health journey. I have started by using a journal and counting calories. My main priority is cut out any sugary drink, cut out candy and fast food. Week one was good in terms to sticking to my goal. Week two and three I decided to incorporate a cheat meals which have helped with my cravings but has not been easy. I have managed to stick with everything for the most parts but some days are harder than others and I have a day or two where I overate. Still not nearly as bad as days where I binged! I’m so scared to lose control again. This is so hard! Every bite scares me, every day feels like a challenge, a chore. I want to get to the point where eating healthy and making the right choices will be my new norm. But I know it’s going to take work, it’s just scary.

My next goal is to start working out. The though of it scares me and as much as I want to understand why, I just can’t.

I want to use this as a place where I can vent and maybe find others that can help and understand what I’m going through.

[nochruch-inthewild]

[nochruch-inthewild]

There was a 39 lbs difference here. The small changes you make will add up if you stay consistent!

I’m very proud of my progress. The workout clothes I once wore when I was getting starting on my weightloss journey no longer fit