nopaintjustpain

[nopaintjustpain]

Okay so addressing this rb— good point, @dysfunctionalcreature!!! Your comment made me realize I may have based this whole meta on an assumption I made or a widely accepted fanon, as is often the trap people fall into with their favorite longform media. So I went back in the transcripts to check the source material for evidence to back up my little thesis!!

Please enjoy the following textual analysis courtesy of a bored English Major who doesn’t get to use their literary analysis skills much irl:

Ep 121:

If you would turn your attention to figure 1!!

Fig. 1.1: This line implies, to me, that Georgie visits often enough to have a sense of who does or doesn’t generally visit Jon in the hospital

Fig. 1.2: This implies that Georgie checks in with Jon’s nurses regularly enough that they would’ve notified her of a new visitor on the way in if they had seen Oliver

Fig. 1.3: Here’s Georgie displaying a significant show of protectiveness over Jon while he’s helpless. Arguably, this could also be chalked up to her (justifiable) hostility to anyone End-affiliated, and her desire to get Oliver Out of her General Vicinity. But it’s worth noting that if her *only* motivation is to be Away from Oliver, she could’ve just given him a minute alone with Jon like he asked. Instead she goes on the defensive. She practically chases Oliver out of the room, rather than flee and leave Jon alone with a potential threat. For all she knows in this moment, she could very well be putting herself in serious danger by getting between Oliver and Jon. She knows the minute she lays eyes on Oliver that he’s Bad News, but she doesn’t hesitate. Just because Georgie doesn’t feel fear doesn’t mean she can’t recognize risk. She knows EXACTLY what she’s risking in this moment, and she does it anyway. That, to me, feels like a significant show of loyalty and care. You see this defensiveness continue on here in Fig. 2:

Fig. 2.1: Okay so after that tense interaction, we get THIS cute little line where Georgie talks to Jon in his coma, knowing he may or may not be able to hear him. It’s generally encouraged to talk to coma patients. And if I remember correctly, her like delivery is casual. Conversational. Implying that she’s comfortable talking to his functionally-dead body. She’s Been Here. She intends to continue Being Here.

Fig. 2.2: In a continuation of my earlier point in 1.3, here we see Georgie run AFTER Oliver after she’s finally got him to leave. If we extrapolate our earlier assumption that she knows very well what a risk this is, we again see reinforcement of her loyalty to Jon. Here, she’s afraid Oliver may have done something to Jon while she wasn’t there, or left something sinister behind. At the very least, she clocks that Oliver recorded something or left something behind, and she’s not gonna let that slide. Again, she goes against her own discomfort for Jon’s sake.

And last but not least, here’s the lines in Ep 122 that essentially define Jon and Georgie’s falling-out:

Not much to say on this tbh. The lines speak for themselves. Georgie is honestly, genuinely disappointed to see him wake up no worse for wear. And WOW does that hurt. I remember her delivery of that “Goodbye” having a certain ring of finality to it, and Jon calling out after her sounded pretty heartbroken and desperate to stop her from walking out. Because he knew that once she was gone, that was it for them. But ultimately he lets her go.

So, in summary: No, it’s never explicitly stated in the text that Georgie stuck by his bedside for six months. But I got that impression from details in the source material which, to me, feel like a strong implication.

So yay! Glad to know I wasn’t just pulling this meta out of my ass lol. I was just kinda trusting my recollections when I wrote the original post, but it’s vindicating to look back on the text and find evidence to back it up.

Hey.

Do you ever think part of the reason Georgie stayed by Jon’s bedside through all 6 months of his coma but then abruptly walked out of his life when he woke up is because she was fully expecting to be a caregiver for him during a long, grueling post-coma recovery process?

Do you think part of the reason she was so spooked by him waking up (relatively) unscathed is because she had mentally, physically, and emotionally prepared herself to take him in? That her best case scenario — what she had planned and hoped for — was that he’d wake up with severe cognitive and/or physical deficits, as one would expect from someone who survived an explosion and six months in a coma? That he’d have to re-learn how to walk or talk or eat or hold a spoon on his own? That he would *need* someone, and even if it wasn’t what she wanted for herself or him, she had decided she would step up and be that person for him?

It can be so jarring when you build up a vision of your near future around one assumption, only for that assumption to be completely shattered by reality. Do you think she constructed a future for him in her head, and when he woke up “fine”, she was so startled by the breaking of her expectations that it felt almost like a betrayal? And the sheer uncanny impossibility of him waking up “fine” made her think that her friend was dead after all?

Do you think that after Martin stopped coming around and Georgie found herself alone at Jon’s bedside, she realized she was all he had left in the world? The only one who held onto hope that he would survive in some form? The only one who thought he could wake up, severely disabled by his experiences but free at last? The only one who thought he deserved the chance at a mundane life after all of this, even if that life would look radically different? Do you think she grappled with the reality that if she didn’t step up for him, no one would? Do you think she spent long hours coping with the fact that she was going to have to take on new responsibilities and make new sacrifices for him, but she was willing to do it for an old friend who deserved better than the hand he was dealt? Do you think she mourned her old vision of her future, before she reconstructed that vision around caring for him?

Do you think she started talking to Jon’s doctors about what she could expect if she brought him home after he woke up? What kinds of disabilities he would live with, and what the prognosis was? About his quality of life afterwards? His road to recovery? Do you think she made up her spare bedroom with a severely disabled person in mind, and then started looking into hiring a part time caregiver to come help her make sure Jon got the help (she assumed) he’d need? Do you think she did all kinds of research into brain injuries and their aftermath? Physical therapy for people with severe atrophy? NG tubes for re-feeding severely starved people? Occupational therapists?

Do you think part of the reason she was so upset when he woke up (relatively) unscathed, lucid and talking and breathing on his own, maybe a little physically weak but still much like his old self, is because she had realistic expectations of what his life would look like after his injuries? And seeing him suddenly defy all odds by waking up into a full cognitive and physical recovery — a completely unrealistic hope that she never even considered as part of the realm of possibility — only reinforced the idea that the old Jon was dead, and this new Jon wasn’t safe for her to be around?

Do you think it hurt when she realized she couldn’t bring him home?

I think about that.

[nopaintjustpain]

YESYESYES THANK GOD SOMEONE SAID IT BECAUSE I WAS THINKING IT LITERALLY 5 MINS AFTER I POSTED!!!!

Georgie had a fucking BINDER full of occupational therapists, mental health counselors, physical therapists, caregiving services, the works!! She budgeted for it! She set aside SAVINGS just in case!! She was READY to take someone to all the doctor’s appointments! She had her apartment SET for someone who’s using a mobility aid to navigate! She rearranged her furniture and everything! She had a grab bars installed in her bathroom! She bought a shower chair! Her guest room was all made up and ready for someone to move their whole life there if need be!

When Jon ended up not needing all of that and she came home to a still-empty flat, part of her was glad she didn’t have to rearrange her whole life after all. Just because she was *prepared* to step into a caregiving role doesn’t mean she actively *wanted* to. She just cared about her friend enough that she was ready and willing to do it anyway.

But at the same time… she’s glad, but also weirdly disappointed? All that work for nothing, y’know? If makes her feel a bit foolish for wasting her time and money like that when literally no one asked her to. She just did it without consulting anyone. And worse… she was so sure in her expectation that she’d be bringing someone home, her flat feels weirdly empty now that she knows no one’s coming . Which is ridiculous, right?? It was just her and the Admiral before, and that was enough. Except now it’s not. Nothing’s changed. Just herself and her expectations.

And her disappointment in Jon, of course. She was doing what was best for herself by cutting him off, but that doesn’t make it hurt less. She hated that it came to that.

So she’s alone in a too-empty flat, mourning the loss of a friend who she just couldn’t keep supporting through this terrible thing he kept throwing himself into. She couldn’t watch him self-destruct anymore. She had to put herself first.

And then… along comes Melanie! Once Jon and Basira un-Slaughter her, Melanie actually starts putting in the effort that Jon couldn’t, or wouldn’t! Georgie is so SO happy to take her to her therapy appointments as long as Melanie keeps putting in the work to heal from her trauma. Georgie is so happy and relieved that SOMEONE is making the effort to disconnect from this awful, toxic environment. She’s not going to lose everyone to the Fears the way she lost Jon! She can actually HELP someone this time!

Can you imagine her relief when Melanie finally makes the call to quit, no matter the cost? When she comes to Georgie with a solution, and commits to it? To being better? To following through?

Because I can imagine it.

Hey.

Do you ever think part of the reason Georgie stayed by Jon’s bedside through all 6 months of his coma but then abruptly walked out of his life when he woke up is because she was fully expecting to be a caregiver for him during a long, grueling post-coma recovery process?

Do you think part of the reason she was so spooked by him waking up (relatively) unscathed is because she had mentally, physically, and emotionally prepared herself to take him in? That her best case scenario — what she had planned and hoped for — was that he’d wake up with severe cognitive and/or physical deficits, as one would expect from someone who survived an explosion and six months in a coma? That he’d have to re-learn how to walk or talk or eat or hold a spoon on his own? That he would *need* someone, and even if it wasn’t what she wanted for herself or him, she had decided she would step up and be that person for him?

It can be so jarring when you build up a vision of your near future around one assumption, only for that assumption to be completely shattered by reality. Do you think she constructed a future for him in her head, and when he woke up “fine”, she was so startled by the breaking of her expectations that it felt almost like a betrayal? And the sheer uncanny impossibility of him waking up “fine” made her think that her friend was dead after all?

Do you think that after Martin stopped coming around and Georgie found herself alone at Jon’s bedside, she realized she was all he had left in the world? The only one who held onto hope that he would survive in some form? The only one who thought he could wake up, severely disabled by his experiences but free at last? The only one who thought he deserved the chance at a mundane life after all of this, even if that life would look radically different? Do you think she grappled with the reality that if she didn’t step up for him, no one would? Do you think she spent long hours coping with the fact that she was going to have to take on new responsibilities and make new sacrifices for him, but she was willing to do it for an old friend who deserved better than the hand he was dealt? Do you think she mourned her old vision of her future, before she reconstructed that vision around caring for him?

Do you think she started talking to Jon’s doctors about what she could expect if she brought him home after he woke up? What kinds of disabilities he would live with, and what the prognosis was? About his quality of life afterwards? His road to recovery? Do you think she made up her spare bedroom with a severely disabled person in mind, and then started looking into hiring a part time caregiver to come help her make sure Jon got the help (she assumed) he’d need? Do you think she did all kinds of research into brain injuries and their aftermath? Physical therapy for people with severe atrophy? NG tubes for re-feeding severely starved people? Occupational therapists?

Do you think part of the reason she was so upset when he woke up (relatively) unscathed, lucid and talking and breathing on his own, maybe a little physically weak but still much like his old self, is because she had realistic expectations of what his life would look like after his injuries? And seeing him suddenly defy all odds by waking up into a full cognitive and physical recovery — a completely unrealistic hope that she never even considered as part of the realm of possibility — only reinforced the idea that the old Jon was dead, and this new Jon wasn’t safe for her to be around?

Do you think it hurt when she realized she couldn’t bring him home?

I think about that.

[nopaintjustpain]

Btw I’m a sadist in case that wasn’t clear

[nopaintjustpain]

Oooh ow ow ow that’s fucked up too and I love it…. Maybe she meant it more literally than we thought when she said she couldn’t let herself be “dragged down with him”. She’s self-aware enough to know that her frame of reference is skewed. I always thought it was fucked up of her to tell him that he’s losing his humanity and needs people around him to help him stay true to himself, but then turn around and remove herself from his support network. But now that decision makes more sense. She *can’t* help him counterbalance or combat his connection to Fear because she doesn’t feel it.

Hey.

Do you ever think part of the reason Georgie stayed by Jon’s bedside through all 6 months of his coma but then abruptly walked out of his life when he woke up is because she was fully expecting to be a caregiver for him during a long, grueling post-coma recovery process?

Do you think part of the reason she was so spooked by him waking up (relatively) unscathed is because she had mentally, physically, and emotionally prepared herself to take him in? That her best case scenario — what she had planned and hoped for — was that he’d wake up with severe cognitive and/or physical deficits, as one would expect from someone who survived an explosion and six months in a coma? That he’d have to re-learn how to walk or talk or eat or hold a spoon on his own? That he would *need* someone, and even if it wasn’t what she wanted for herself or him, she had decided she would step up and be that person for him?

It can be so jarring when you build up a vision of your near future around one assumption, only for that assumption to be completely shattered by reality. Do you think she constructed a future for him in her head, and when he woke up “fine”, she was so startled by the breaking of her expectations that it felt almost like a betrayal? And the sheer uncanny impossibility of him waking up “fine” made her think that her friend was dead after all?

Do you think that after Martin stopped coming around and Georgie found herself alone at Jon’s bedside, she realized she was all he had left in the world? The only one who held onto hope that he would survive in some form? The only one who thought he could wake up, severely disabled by his experiences but free at last? The only one who thought he deserved the chance at a mundane life after all of this, even if that life would look radically different? Do you think she grappled with the reality that if she didn’t step up for him, no one would? Do you think she spent long hours coping with the fact that she was going to have to take on new responsibilities and make new sacrifices for him, but she was willing to do it for an old friend who deserved better than the hand he was dealt? Do you think she mourned her old vision of her future, before she reconstructed that vision around caring for him?

Do you think she started talking to Jon’s doctors about what she could expect if she brought him home after he woke up? What kinds of disabilities he would live with, and what the prognosis was? About his quality of life afterwards? His road to recovery? Do you think she made up her spare bedroom with a severely disabled person in mind, and then started looking into hiring a part time caregiver to come help her make sure Jon got the help (she assumed) he’d need? Do you think she did all kinds of research into brain injuries and their aftermath? Physical therapy for people with severe atrophy? NG tubes for re-feeding severely starved people? Occupational therapists?

Do you think part of the reason she was so upset when he woke up (relatively) unscathed, lucid and talking and breathing on his own, maybe a little physically weak but still much like his old self, is because she had realistic expectations of what his life would look like after his injuries? And seeing him suddenly defy all odds by waking up into a full cognitive and physical recovery — a completely unrealistic hope that she never even considered as part of the realm of possibility — only reinforced the idea that the old Jon was dead, and this new Jon wasn’t safe for her to be around?

Do you think it hurt when she realized she couldn’t bring him home?

I think about that.

[nopaintjustpain]

Hey.

Do you ever think part of the reason Georgie stayed by Jon’s bedside through all 6 months of his coma but then abruptly walked out of his life when he woke up is because she was fully expecting to be a caregiver for him during a long, grueling post-coma recovery process?

Do you think part of the reason she was so spooked by him waking up (relatively) unscathed is because she had mentally, physically, and emotionally prepared herself to take him in? That her best case scenario — what she had planned and hoped for — was that he’d wake up with severe cognitive and/or physical deficits, as one would expect from someone who survived an explosion and six months in a coma? That he’d have to re-learn how to walk or talk or eat or hold a spoon on his own? That he would *need* someone, and even if it wasn’t what she wanted for herself or him, she had decided she would step up and be that person for him?

It can be so jarring when you build up a vision of your near future around one assumption, only for that assumption to be completely shattered by reality. Do you think she constructed a future for him in her head, and when he woke up “fine”, she was so startled by the breaking of her expectations that it felt almost like a betrayal? And the sheer uncanny impossibility of him waking up “fine” made her think that her friend was dead after all?

Do you think that after Martin stopped coming around and Georgie found herself alone at Jon’s bedside, she realized she was all he had left in the world? The only one who held onto hope that he would survive in some form? The only one who thought he could wake up, severely disabled by his experiences but free at last? The only one who thought he deserved the chance at a mundane life after all of this, even if that life would look radically different? Do you think she grappled with the reality that if she didn’t step up for him, no one would? Do you think she spent long hours coping with the fact that she was going to have to take on new responsibilities and make new sacrifices for him, but she was willing to do it for an old friend who deserved better than the hand he was dealt? Do you think she mourned her old vision of her future, before she reconstructed that vision around caring for him?

Do you think she started talking to Jon’s doctors about what she could expect if she brought him home after he woke up? What kinds of disabilities he would live with, and what the prognosis was? About his quality of life afterwards? His road to recovery? Do you think she made up her spare bedroom with a severely disabled person in mind, and then started looking into hiring a part time caregiver to come help her make sure Jon got the help (she assumed) he’d need? Do you think she did all kinds of research into brain injuries and their aftermath? Physical therapy for people with severe atrophy? NG tubes for re-feeding severely starved people? Occupational therapists?

Do you think part of the reason she was so upset when he woke up (relatively) unscathed, lucid and talking and breathing on his own, maybe a little physically weak but still much like his old self, is because she had realistic expectations of what his life would look like after his injuries? And seeing him suddenly defy all odds by waking up into a full cognitive and physical recovery — a completely unrealistic hope that she never even considered as part of the realm of possibility — only reinforced the idea that the old Jon was dead, and this new Jon wasn’t safe for her to be around?

Do you think it hurt when she realized she couldn’t bring him home?

I think about that.

[nopaintjustpain]

idk the thing i like about the lonely is that theres no one traumatizing incident. its a slow and oppressive fear. like i dont think jon was 'marked' by the fifteen minutes he spent yelling 'mahtin' in the lonely, i think he was marked by the weeks and weeks of everyone hating his ass through season 4.

Martin wasn't the same. he was isolated, and sad, but he found comfort in the lonely the same way Lukas did, and the same way Jude did with the desolation. He was letting the lonely into himself, not being sacrificed to it.

i always saw it more that Martin was being groomed to become an avatar, and jon was gonna be his first victim.

[nopaintjustpain]

Me when a character starts experiencing an agonizingly, Horrifically, painful transformation :

[nopaintjustpain]

okay i lied put your clothes back on we're not having sex i'm fundamentally evil and i need you to kill me

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jon sims moodboard

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Me throwing Nikola at a brick wall at top speed so I can hear the stupid little squeaky toy noise her body makes when it hits

I HAVE A NEW AU IDEA FOR NIKOLA AND TIM - something something Tim and Nikola survive the Unknowing but are now tied metaphysically together and cannot hurt one another nor exist without the other. Nikola's weakened and loses her body and Tim is No Longer Human in a way that anyone can quite figure out

Nikola is reduced to possessing a lil clown doll/puppet and Tim has to carry her around in his pocket 😔Tim hates this thing so damn much but he has no choice but to haul the freaky monster around constantly

I want to draw some things for it SOOON

[nopaintjustpain]

t.... tim maybe...

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girls girls girls girls girls-

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@blackberreh-art's version of Elias is too pretty and makes me think Man. I do not draw old men hot enough, I should experiment that. Anywayyyyy, true to form, I got carried away.

CLOSE UP ⬇️

[nopaintjustpain]

while i do think jmart's first kiss actually went something like awkward, intense and heavy tension of asking "can i kiss you?" in the safe house,,. i have been daydreaming about their first kiss being immediately post lonely with jon clinging on martin in the panopticon going "are you okay? are you hurt?" over and over again when he suddenly Knows martin wants so desperately to kiss him and without a seconds hesitation they start making out with a passion that could bring tim back from the dead

[nopaintjustpain]

everyone has already said this about mag 81 but jon really just spends twenty minutes absolutely laying into himself. yeah I was an egotistical child who was difficult to care for and the adults around me were generally justified in their open resentment and violence towards me because I was so annoying and then my trauma made me super self-centered and uncompassionate towards other people's suffering and no I will not be extending even half as much emotional grace towards myself as I do to the adult who routinely beat me up until I was eight <- jesus christ man.

[nopaintjustpain]

repost for just the art

maybe this will be an art print someday who knows

[nopaintjustpain]

happy birthday all might !