nytobaltimore

[nytobaltimore]

90s House S1 E3

Episode 3 lets goooo

I can’t tell if I’m just a sucker for MTV’s stupid programming, or if this garbage is actually any good. I think I’m just a sucker. As I sit here waiting for Free on Demand to finish it’s stupid commercials and start the show, staring at my Wendy’s and listening to my PC whir in old computer noise language, I feel like a sucker. I am a sucker. I’m also going to start talking about AYTO because I kind of liked the first episode, so I’m gonna watch it over again

MTV should pay me at this point. Pass those coins Viacom

To recap, I am still just team Sha’Monique. She’s from New York, she hates her job, she’s sassy, black and with braids. There is a physical altercation in this episode? That’s cool. This is just The Real World <2000, with people my own age and more miserable

The soundtrack for this show by the way is EVERYTHING

Prince was a great leader, Patrick? Let’s relax

Sidebar, my MacBook is on 6% so I pray it does not die. Oh no here’s the notification that if I don’t charge it, it’s going to sleep... Guess I’m getting the charger. Millenial problems..

Did I catch that right? Becky told my fine light skinned brother that my future boyfriend (try to keep up here) is a stripper? Shut up Becky, what do you do?!

Why does this black girl like Mark? Girl stop it. 

Why is Prince still pushing the choreography from the last challenge? Let’s move on, new day new challenge. Chase is bothering you? You came AT him, my guy

Does Lance Bass bother anyone else but me?

Skip-It was the devil’s toy, thank god my broke ass parents did not buy that for me. Devin kills me, I hope he wins this one I don’t know why. Maybe cause I like his sneakers.

Those things are so noisy. The sound alone would force me to be out, I can’t believe my queen lost, I hate this stupid Becky with the good gums. 

Honestly, other than the money. This prize doesn’t sound good. Like I wouldn’t care.

Why is everyone so focused on my queen? And what is wrong with Prince? Hanging up not-Sha’s phone call? Throwing the board game pieces in the air? Throwing water on not-Sha? Why? He’s starting problems for what reason? I cannot deal with him. Glad Patrick finally woke up and realized his friend is batsa

Batsa for bat shit. Like batshit crazy. It’s a commercial so I feel the need to explain

I’m actually so glad these fools are forced to be sober and interact without computers or phones. I feel like that’s what makes the Real World so problematic. They get drunk, they talk to family on the phone who are mildly racist (see last Real World season), like it all makes it worse.

Look at these dumb ass boys scheming to get rid of Prince. I’m shocked and appalled but I’m glad it’s happening. The Big Three? Corny but I’ll take it.

Watching Mark struggle with this phone is comical. And I KNEW Jasmine had to be fake, black girls don’t like little Asians like this. Not-Sha/Jenielle (just saw her name on the TV) needs to get it together and understand that he is playing her and everyone.com.

The girl whose name is a car (Lexus) is right to be suspicious. Because he could definitely go tell Prince.

This is so stupid. What is this fight between Prince and my light skinned brother? And CarGirl said they lie and cheat? When did Sha cheat? Girl don’t start with me, your parents named you after a vehicle. Bye

I respect Chase over all of the rest of these fools. Sierra is a hooker, I’m over it. Prince’s prayer over the food was hysterical, I loved it. 

What in tarnation why is Bill Bellamy here? You don’t have anything better to do? He looks good though, doesn’t look like he’s aged a bit. Black don’t crack y’all. 

Fun fact, Sierra’s shirt is from Hollister. I think. My vision isn’t always the best lol

Mark’s mesh shirt is hysterical. Stop, we should let him go out in it. I would walk up to a guy in that and be like wow bro, you’re really bold for this.

Do these fools not go out and drink? Like why are we not okay with this?

I feel attacked by Shannon’s rap. Mark forgetting the names is too much for me. Patrick is a hoe so this is perfect for me. Prince’s lie that he is the manager for Destiny’s Child is HYSTERICAL. Chase is not good at this. He’s kind of awkward. Comes across a little corny? If I met him in a bar, I wouldn’t be interested

PRINCE CALLED CHASE JIMMY NEUTRON. I’M DECEASED

Chase is dead ass bold for raising his hand to nominate Prince to go. And Patrick’s cosign was unnecessary. Who raised these people? Prince defended himself in this instance in the right way, because this was not only immature it probably won’t work.

Jenielle/Not-Sha did well, and I’m happy for her. Confirmed that the ploy against Prince didn’t work.

I feel like Shannon is gonna go. Lexus looks really mean when she is told she’s on the bounce pad. I feel like her attitude alone should eliminate her.

Shannon should probably go. She is boring

DEVIN YELLING ACTING IS LITERALLY ME. Why aren’t I on this show???

LMFAO YOU’RE BOTH ILLIN. I’M DECEASED. I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING

I can’t believe they were both eliminated. Why is this man crying, I don’t believe him anymore

This was the best episode EVER. I have never enjoyed myself more.

[nytobaltimore]

90s House S1 E2

And just like that, it’s episode 2!

Thank god Travana/Toyota was ILLIN, whatever that means. Bye. I don’t miss you.

Knowing that Mark is manipulating all of them sucks. Initially I liked him

YAS Sha, expose Becky for what she is! A fake. I don’t think I like her. She’s annoying

Patrick and the Prince will be an interesting matchup. Patrick is annoying, I can’t determine whether or not I hate him. He’s corny. Is he country? She’s country. I’m confused.

Christina Milian has gorgeous hair. Can I have it?

Boys versus girls is everything. I love that immediately it becomes that kind of competition. This challenge seems fun

The boys legit have the BEST song. I’m so jealous, I would be all over this with the dancing. What an album

Cute Little white boy? Oh sorry, Chase. He’s adorable. Great moment to premiere to the group that you’re a male stripper. 

It’s so annoyingly stereotypical that the girls have Spice Girls. I would’ve rather the guys team and song, way more fun. But the Spice Girls can be fun because it can be a lot of crazy outfits and team work girl power long live the vagina or whatever.

This dance instructor is aggressive.com. The butterfly is literally just the tootsie roll papa, just say that. And the running man is me shuffling at every rave so I’m all over that.

Prince baby do better. You can’t dance. William too. I’m so sad for them lmao what do you guys do at the club? Damn

Sierra is really really annoying. Also I love how my brother and sisters are questioning her because that’s exactly what I would do. We are so nosy. Why do we hype her up. Please note the black people are NOT in the pool

Mark has what girlfriend? Jasmine sounds black. I’m confused. oh wait CONFIRMED she is black. I figured thank you I can sniff a sister out of anywhere

Only thing I agree with is that Sierra wants to watch Chase strip cause me too hunny. Also these girls are about to kill this competition. and shoutout my girl SHA BEING THE LEADER girl me too can we be friends in real life?

The Guys have crazy awesome shirts like I need them.

Why is Joey Fatone here? Bye it���s not 2000.

God help these boys. This already looks a hot mess. 

If my girls don’t do well I will cry. Dead over home girls nipple flying out

Ew why is Patrick a horny NYC fuckboy I am OVER IT. Bye. I’m deceased that Sha literally roasted them all. Where did Mark come from with this attitude? I would’ve thrown that water bottle at his head not gonna like cause don’t clap and go on in my face. I’m not the one and today is not the day papa

Why is this little man crying? Man up. She threw water in his face? It also got in her face. Let’s relax. Also he is manipulating all of them

PRINCE IS THE WEAKEST LINK. I’m deceased. That was so petty

It’s move out day????????? Why is Sha ME? She called them peasants. Same Queen

Why are we throwing shoes outside? Better question, who cares? It’s MTV’s property lmao like who cares. And Sinead O’Connor needs to stop it with her PLUR Peace love unity happiness crap. If you’re gonna stay out of it then just stay out if it.

“Namaste-Not today” is gonna be my next tattoo. Thank you Sha for creating this with Mark without even meaning to. 

The boys video reminds me of the Fruit of the Loom video that those fruits made as a commercial. The girls video was good but like I said earlier, I’m over girl power stuff its lame to me. Congrats to the girls for winning though! Girls are better. I’m dead Lance literally roasted them

I already know Prince isn’t leaving because he is the drama of the show. And Chase was gucci. So it has to be William. Which makes me sad cause I think he’s adorable. He could’ve gone far. Bye boo

And just like that it’s over. These episodes are super short so I don’t know if I can do this, I feel like I’m cheating and writing less and about nothing

[nytobaltimore]

90′s House S1 E1

Let’s bring this back

I eventually stopped once I started working and went to camp. But YOLO you can do whatever you want when you’re popping so I’m gonna start blogging about this new MTV show. Essentially, MTV is struggling for viewers and are scrambling for programs that will appeal to young adults, teenagers, and now the people in their mid twenties that were kids when all of this stuff was cool. 90′s house? TRL? I loved TRL when I was a kid, then I like hit twelve and I thought it was the worst thing ever and screamed when it was on tv. Then I was sad it was gone. Have I watched it since it’s been back? No lol but maybe I’ll talk about it next blog post.

Anyway. Back to the show. Interesting concept. I will admit, once I realized it was a combination of the Real World and The Challenge, the two shows I stand by on MTV for my entire life, I was interested. And I watched the first episode right before bed just to see what it was about. So let’s get started!

First of all, MTV, y’all fucked up not calling me. I would’ve been so good for this show. Not only am I super entertaining, but I would’ve been great at this 90′s shit. I was an only child in the 90s, born to a computer nerd father and a busy mom so all I did was watch tv. Missed an opportunity

I’m glad the cast is diverse though

Lance Bass I can get. But Christina Milian wasn’t cool in the 90s, she was cool in the 00′s. But they need a host lol clearly. $90k is a calm prize though

FIRST OF ALL. The queen. Is in the building. Sha’Monique? Ratchet name. But I’m here for it. We’re from the same area. We’re the same age. Hell, we have the same hairstyle currently. She’s my #1 pick I only want her to win bye everyone else

We behave the same at work. I make the same faces and have the same attitude about work. I was cracking up watching her 

Patrick is lame idk I’m not interested in men like this. He is good looking I will give it to him. But corny like stop kissing hands bye.

This bald bitch Shannon is interesante, I do have to say. She has a good energy. Anyone that can pull of purple lipstick and those earrings is good in my book

Devin is a beautiful light skinned brother, go ahead my brother.

Jenielle looks kind of familiar. Her snap with the puppy filter looks like my friend. I feel her on the mom thing, I would give my mom all the money too

Mark the asian is cool, he reminds me of my friend James but we call him Kitty. Like this guy rolled up on the hoverboard. Come on

Chase is cool, but he’s a stripper and that’s different with a capital D. I hate that I like blonde men, his accent is kind of annoying

Travana King needs Jesus. Her kid is cute but I can’t stand her from the start. I hate white women that think its okay to talk like this

Sierra is BORING. Don’t care. Hope you lose. Like your dress though, lemme borrow that. But I hate white women with so much gums showing. It’s stressful to me. I’m not being racist it honestly stresses me out when anyone has it to be honest. I guess I should say I hate too much gums and when I can see your whole mouth

This other extra lazy black girl Lexus is annoying. She has a bad attitude written all over her face and those types of females do not like me. She sounds lazy even when she speaks. No one cares who your cousins are, they’re not YOU. Also why are you named after a car

Prince Carter is THAT BITCH. He is another one that I am totally here for 

William could be my next boyfriend. He’s so cute. He needs my number. Call me William

Lance Bass’s outfit is wild though. Like I need that

Yeah. Take their phones. Take it all! I love that they have to wear 90s clothes. Sha went the route I would’ve went

Travana. Whatever your hooker name is. Your outfit wasn’t that great calm down.

This challenge had me fucked up cause I feel like they all weren’t paying attention to the rules. Lance said here is your theme, here is your song, make an opening. Make sure it’s clear about the characters. Y’all can’t use a boombox?

Why is Travana the leader of anything? Go home. Literally. I can’t stand her on my tv screen. What is she even saying? Poor Mark. Poor Chase. Poor Prince. Prince is right, he should’ve led it. I feel like he wouldn’t of made it so bad.

These ideas are cute, but they all could’ve done better. 

Dead that Devin and Sha hid their stuff. I’m dead. And this girl said “transferred it”. Literally me

Toyota didn’t need to turn up like this. She wants to be black so badly like relax skinny puppy. Her and Prince hyped each other up. Sha yawned. ME TOO GIRL. Janielle is right though, put that energy into your team. Dramatic little bitch shut UP, like pipe down it’s over go find your stuff and stop yelling

Bye Mario Lopez

I’m glad Sha and her team won, she was kind of aggressive but you have to be in order to be a leader. I wonder if she’s a Scorpio. I just followed her on twitter

Toyota is super defensive. Her idea sucked. She sucks. And she was super rude to Mark, she blamed it all on him when it wasn’t even his fault. That’s why she had to leave. Bad attitude

I think this show will be interesting. Lets see how episode 2 goes....

[nytobaltimore]

The Challenge: Rivals III: S28 E9

Dude. I’m so behind. I had no idea that episode 9 aired last night. Holy recaps

I like this challenge. This one was good.

Something about Kellyanne’s face makes me really mad. She’s annoying.

Cory and Ashley make me laugh. She’s growing on me!! And I like that TJ fucks with her. It’s cute.

Does anyone else in the world think Nicole is actually the dumbest person on television? And I hate how made up she is, like yes it all looks good and she’s pretty super made up but it’s very aggressive. For me personally.

LOL Wes and Nany lose. How unfortunate is that??? Vince and Jenna/Cory and Ashley going on the day trip with Bananas and Sarah is an interesting pairing. 

Watching these cute little fools sleep and the fake dream about the challenge is funny. 

I haven’t like Nany for a number of years, which I don’t know what changed cause I liked her on her season of the Real World. But something about her being on these challenges has made me dislike her. So if she goes I wouldn’t be sad to see her go. I just like Wes for some weird reason so I wouldn’t want his little ginger butt to go.

Sarah and Bananas working well together makes me happy. I knew they were one in the same, they just needed to find the right page and be on it together.

I think this alliance makes sense. But I’m disappointed that it’s all a scheme to get back at Cory for last season. Kellyanne is making like TOO much sense in this conversation with Jaime. Absolutely Bananas plays an emotional game.

Why don’t I look like Jenna? (insert depressed emoji face here)

Devin/Cheyenne going in. Not surprised! See. They’re the Cara Maria of eliminations. But lets see if they go in over Kellyanne and Jaime. I’m kind of hoping for Kellyanne and Jaime to go against them. A double DQ would make me happiest but whatever. I just want Devin and Cheyenne to stay. I like him! His partner is kind of annoying though.

LOL THAT THEY STAY. HAHAHA

This blind soccer game does not seem fun. Why is everyone yelling when its clear that the purpose of this game is for the girls to listen to their partners? This took entirely TOO long.

Nany. Why are you proud of yourself? Shut up.

These men are aggressive. Jaime needs to like stop holding Wes. I don’t know who I want to win. I don’t care for either one of these teams. They can literally both go.

YES WES! GOOD JOB. I am actually cracking up at this. Poor Wes. Poor little Ginger. Bananas consistently roasts him, and it’s so funny. I really enjoy this show. For everything it is.

Next: these fucks are getting buried alive. Nany cries (I wish I cared).

[nytobaltimore]

The Challenge: Rivals III: S28 E8

Halfway there! I actually watched this episode super inebriated, so I never got to write a recap until.... right now. Oops?

Clearly with this episode, Tony and Camila are gonna go too far and be sent home. Which makes me sad because if you refer to my original post, I was pulling for them.

I swear the entire purpose of this show is just for Tony to be drunk.

Nate and Nicole are awkward. Bye. So are Cory and Cheyanne. I don’t like this stupid alliteration names. Dude like stop

Tony, I love you, but you’ve GOTTAAAAAAAAAA get over it. Yes, Camila is confusing. Yes, she’s sort of annoying. But you’re letting the fact that you’re “rivals” get in the way of this money you’re trying to collect.

Camila falling down is TV gold. You’re so drunk. You can’t even function. Get over it. People fucking fall down everyday. I’ve never heard Creepy Uncle Vin sound so smart and logical, clear and level headed. He was being so nice to her.

I felt bad for Bananas for about sixteen seconds and then he went and woke up Tony and stirred the pot. For WHAT?! They egged him on and now he’s cornered Camila and is yelling at her. I don’t condone any of this, but she can take care of herself just like I can (I’m also small and aggressive) but this entire thing is going too far. And LOL at her fighting with Nany like a psychopath. Relax baby girl

In the end, she was still yelling at Creepy Vin LOL

Tony needs a nap. She needs a nap. Everyone needs rehabilitation.

At least Tony sees the error in his ways. And it’s surprising to me how calm and logical Devin is. If I was in that house, I would really like him (I think).

Tony having no idea what happened isn’t surprising to me. If anyone has seen his season of the Real World, knows what kind of drunk he is.

The appearance of TJ is not a good thing. Bye Tony/Camila. I’ve been watching this show for my entire life. I’ve seen teams go because one person needs to or one person fights or one person is sick. I’ve NEVER seen two people go because they fought with each other. What a terrible pairing

I’m BAFFLED that Bananas sees the error of his ways. Are pigs flying? Did we find life on Mars?

Camila crying does nothing for me. I don’t really feel bad and I don’t know why.

A night challenge is fun! Up All Night seems interesting. I don’t know if I could do it.

Christina. Shut up.

Sarah is my only hope for intelligent females on this show.

Dario’s explanation of what $1,000 could pay for is literally me. I would only consider all of the orders of chicken nuggets and cheeseburgers I could buy.

LOL the Mariachi band. MTV. Why? I cannot deal with this. I’m crying laughing

But I hope they’re paying attention to the song, to the instruments, to the players. Guaranteed that’s the entire point of this.

Devin cracks me up. I wish I was apart of this. Like just a spectator. I know Wes the ginger calls them all annoying but I think they’re entertaining. Or else why would they be there?

Jenna complaining about Vince is my whole life. Why are you touching me? Leave me alone. Literally me.

Why is this man on fire LOL. All of these things they’re seeing are out of control. The iguana was cute! One of my best friends and I have been joking about lizards, getting a lizard, and being in a lizard gang for the past couple days so this fits right in. I don’t think I like reptiles though.

Bananas impression of TJ is the best thing that I’ve ever seen.

I was sad to see this episode go. It was rather entertaining. Well, I guess we’ll see who fails at this mind fuck of an ending to a challenge.

Next episode, there’s a bunch of whining and scheming going on

[nytobaltimore]

The Challenge: Rivals III: S28 E7

Super late this week, I was sick so I couldn’t muster up enough energy to get on the computer.

LMAO why Tony look like that? He looks so depressed. Him and Camila are gonna be their own worst enemy. I feel like because Camila is so foreign, she doesn’t know how to communicate well with people. In her language or English lol

I wish Devin wasn’t such a douche when he’s drinking, I find him really cute. I feel like I’m Cheyenne, and Devin is every ex I’ve ever had squished into one person.

Jamie vs. Devin is POINTLESS. And I hate Kellyanne. I feel like I say this every single week.

Cory, was this any of your business? You don’t mean a damn thing to this Cheyenne female so why are you like, helping her? Stick to your own hot mess. And Cheyenne learned a new word today: “antagonize”. And her voice is kind of annoying after like ten minutes.

LOL TONY. Why are you so mad papa? What did the eggs ever do to you?!

And of course, the next day Camila has to call her sister to find out that grandma died? Like during her fight with Tony, her grandmother died. I feel bad for her and I obviously offer my condolences to her and her family but why is MTV so awkward? Or maybe it’s just Sarah coming to comfort her.

What the fuck is this Challenge? It’s foolishness. Who would consent to doing this? Ever? Also has Nany always been this dumb and I just never noticed? Ashley’s dumb too. I mean there’s no aptitude test that they all have to take to be on this show so clearly everyone’s intelligence is out the window.

LOL at Cory’s Cool Runnings joke. I appreciated that.

What everyone needs to do is just have the back person pick up one green one in one hand, and grab a red or a yellow in the other. While the driver grabs any of the red or yellow. Because no matter what, you’re going to fall lol so you might as well gun it for the big bucks.

Kellyanne and Jamie need to never drive. Anything. Ever. Not even a toy Hess truck into the box on Christmas. Nada.

Kudos to the AYTO squares for winning. But I don’t care about them and have no emotional attachment. Stop whining about this fucking token you fake PLUR hoe. The whining out of these AYTO kids is enough to make me mute the TV.

Amanda SHUT UP. She’s always bitching about something. I can’t wait for her to go home.

This so far just seems like AYTO vs. AYTO. They need to get it together and find some way to work together.

Devin/Cheyenne. You fuckers are SO lucky. They’re like the Cara Maria except they DON’T go into the jungle lol

Kellyanne/Jaime is still annoying but I’m hoping for them to pull through on this one. Nelson and Amanda are REALLY annoying, idk something about Nelson’s face really annoys me. Jaime peeing in the tub is the best thing I think I’ve ever seen.

Why didn’t anyone think to stack them spaced out and standing in the first place? I really considered Jaime to be smart, so I’m surprised. Stacking the shit dumb high is so stupid, cause it just knocks over. Why would that support anything? But I guess it works cause ultimately Kellyanne and Jaime pull through.

BYE AYTO. 

I’m so biased, sorry

[nytobaltimore]

Teen Mom 2: S7 E12: Gone Fishing

I guess this is the finale? That I didn’t even know about, that’s why it’s so late lol

Jenelle: Kaiser is such a baby lol he wants constant attention and he wants what he wants, when he wants it. He sounds like a splitting image of his father, to be quite honest. He’s so cute though so I wouldn’t even be mad. Jenelle and David seem to be a little tired of it though, which I can only imagine what life is like with that constantly.

I know last week I judged Jenelle for a conversation that we didn’t get to see the entirety of yet. I feel bad for her sometimes, I know she loves her sons more than anything. Yes I think it’s a power thing for her to have custody of Jace, which is why she is so difficult with Nathan about Kaiser because she doesn’t have custody of her first son. She just wants him around her and in her life, it’s just difficult because she’s a TV personality and is young and evidently sick all the time. And she’s very temperamental, she gets angry on the fly and flips out over nothing. So I worry about Jace living with her permanently.

This argument with Barb is just too much. Every episode it’s the two of them arguing. Barb is sitting in her kitchen lol guzzling her wine, shitting on Jenelle’s boyfriends as usual. Her mom is kind of judgmental. Not that she doesn’t have reason to feel like this, but it’s like when will it end??????

Leah: Leah and this stupid custody crap is really getting old. It should’ve been 50/50 from the start. Kudos to her making it a year since “treatment” for all her issues.

I feel bad for her with this whole Jeremy/new girlfriend thing. That’s awkward. I can’t even imagine. And I’m sure that some part of her probably thought they were gonna get back together. I REALLY hoped for it. I really liked him. Their initial meeting was awkward. Like let’s not have that ever again lol but I hope no animosity builds between them. 

Because of her awkward custody agreement and visitation time between her two men, the girls suffer. So when her daughter with Jeremy is home, the twins aren’t there. Then they have like a day together until she goes to her fathers, and then they maybe have another day together until the twins are back with Corey. That sounds horrible. These poor girls are barely getting to grow up together, and that’s mostly because of Leah and her poor decisions. I hate that the have to suffer as a result. But she’s really trying for them, and makes the effort for them to see each other and bond.

Those girls LOVE her. And I find it funny that Gracie teases her. I think they are so alike, I really see Gracie in her mother. And Addie looks JUST like Jeremy, it’s crazy.

Chelsea: I really want to know how Chelsea can make messy hair look so pretty and effortless. Her hair is my goals. At least now, cause previously her hair was a hot mess years ago lol those were the good old days. She looks so much better recently. 

LOL their date is so cute, but so strange. Like they’re a weird couple. But they make me so happy. Cole is such a good match for her. Seeing him excited for his wedding band makes me smile, he’s such a good fit for her! Which is good because Chelsea’s track record was not good, from Adam and onward lol

But Chelsea, Cole and Aubree are a very cute little family

Kailyn: Lincoln is really the cutest baby ever. Can I have him?

I mentioned last week concerns for Kailyn and Javi’s marriage. They keep circling the issue, and aren’t trying or compromising at all. Granted, it’s television and I’m sure there are things I’m not seeing. But Javi is asking so much of her, what that is I don’t know, and he has to understand that he left her home alone to not only film a TV show, but to take care of two young boys, two (or maybe three) dogs, an entire house. It’s not like she’s sitting around with her thumb up her ass, not paying attention to him on FaceTime. And I feel for him too, it’s probably hard being in the military and being away from your family like that. But give me a break.

Family time between her, Linc, Isaac, Jo and his bald spot, Vee and baby with letter for a name is nice. It’s good to see them all getting along. It makes me so sad when Isaac keeps asking or mentioning Javi, because Kail is avoiding it like the plague. And people are literally looking at her expecting an answer or a response and mum is the fucking word. That’s awkward.

I don’t think it’s fair for Javi to make such an ultimatum. She’s a woman, she’s young, she has plenty of time to have children. Later on down the line, she could have like four more. But right now she’s bored and wants to focus on her career, the same way Javi is out doing his thing. So why can’t she do that? It seems sort of selfish to me. And he was so dismissive about it too. Ugh

Next: it’s the reunion! I hate Nathan still 100%! Adam too!

[nytobaltimore]

The Challenge: Rivals III: S28 E6

Alright, on to the Challenge!

Immediately seeing Nany and her stupid cousin made me mad. I like Nany... sometimes. But her cousin drives me insane I cannot stand her. Something about their faces makes me wanna kick them.

Devin and Camilanator are cute! I actually find him super attractive, with the joke that is my life, he seems like my type. And we haven’t seen Camila with anyone good since Bananas. This could be the guy for her! Found love in a hot ass foreign place.

But Tony and Slut? Uh. That’s awkward. The two house whores getting together doesn’t sound like a good idea. And they want to claim they didn’t hook up? Really? Are you sure? Because we saw Tony take his underwear off and put the back on, on tape lol so something clearly happened there. And we saw Ashley pull her skirt on and run away to her bed once morning came. Weird mix. 

Jaime, why are you mad? Cause you LIKED her bro. I hate men. They like girls and then once they have them, they don’t care anymore and then as SOON as someone else shows interest: they are mad and want you back. Cry me a river. Spare me the soap opera drama, I have one already and it airs on NBC 4 at 1pm everyday.

Simone’s comments, to me, are not warranted. Shut your stupid fucking face. I can’t wait until she goes home.

Glad these fools are eating some nasty, squishy shit. This was what always appealed to me about the Challenge: seeing them do things that seemed like they were made for TV. Or maybe I’m a sadist and I like to watch people suffer? Probably a little bit of both. These relay race looks fun.

Seeing Bananas suffer a little is hysterical. And I cannot stand KellyAnne. I think that Cory and Ashley have some of the best rapport between teammates on this show. Ever. They really support each other. I can see them going far. Amanda/Nelson is annoying. Nany is a brat, she doesn’t work that well with Wes and he’s really a smart and good player.

LMFAO poor Jenna. And the sad thing is when they got to the start, Jenna said isn’t that ours? and Vince just started on whichever one he wanted. I feel bad that they have to start over. But this is a game. And nothing is worse than the stupid AYTO kids losing their token halfway through.

Birthday cake vs. birthday suit is probably the funniest thing in the entire world LMFAO. I love that Bananas and Sarah won and immediately picked up the sign and covered themselves. Wes’ ginger, pale ass running was the highlight of my entire night. And Tom’s dad bod is pretty hot, so he doesn’t have anything to complain about ;) also him and his twin were like, international tennis stars or something.

Also, little AYTO brat Christina crying about losing the “key”/”coin”. THAT’S NOT PLUR. She raves, I know for a fact, and she’s whining. Be one with the Bassnectar, bitch, and shut up. Sidebar: I rave so I hope no one is offended by me. I just can’t take whiners.

And this dinner between Bananas and Sarah makes me kind of uncomfortable. But I’m glad they’re scheming together instead of against each other.

This Tom v. Vinny fight seems dumb. But that’s the entire purpose of these shows, they pump these kids full of alcohol and make them hang out so eventually the sparks will fly. And now it’s Tom v. Bananas. Why did he have to get involved? Cause it’s his stupid cousin? His cousin is annoying, and I can’t really stand him; I only like him because he’s Jenna’s partner and I like her. The fact that they get another chance, they better not fuck it up. 

But wait? What is this twist? Tony! Camila! I’m SO SHOCKED. Camila is freaking out. I can’t stop laughing. I’m happy with the teams picked. Tony telling Camila that she needs to man up and own up to her mistake and just go into the Jungle is the most mature thing he’s ever said. I can’t believe how she over reacted. And LOL at Nany choosing that moment to straighten her hair. Ugh. Eye roll.

As it nears 11pm, I can see we aren’t going to get a challenge and an elimination in one episode. I guess because of all the drama in the episode. I’m kind of disappointed, but I’m content with everything that happened. Another (sort of) successful episode.

BYE SIMONE. I’m sorry that Tom has to leave, I really like him as a person and a competitor. And I’m sort of glad that Tony/Camila and Nany/Wes don’t have to go against each other. 

Next: Tony has a mental break down (was wondering when that was gonna happen), Camila cheers him on, Cory randomly fights with Devin, there’s another challenge and of course, more foolishness. 

[nytobaltimore]

Real Housewives of NYC: S8 E10: Unhappy Holidays

I’m SOOOOO annoyed this episode started with these bitches still fighting. I’m still entertained though.

Like, can we let this B vs. Countess thing go? We are STILL going. I feel bad at this point. Because I feel like Lu is getting attacked at this point. Like they are all just pointing the finger and complaining about her.

And as we go to commercial, I start to feel bad for Jules. Who just wanted a nice weekend away with her new friends, and with Dorinda. 

LOL that Bravo keeps putting the time on different scenes. I am really appreciating it. And LOL at that stupid fucking Santa Clause.

Good Bethenny. Feel bad for your behavior last night. It was very ridiculous. The entire thing was out of hand from the beginning, from the moment she jumped up and was really just yelling in her face. And it found it sort of childish that she wanted to try and just leave without saying goodbye. Like you’re rude. You’re gonna just run away? Carole, you just do whatever the hell it is Bethenny does. Grow up.

I think I like Jules. I’m trying to like her. As long as she doesn’t mention that she’s a) Asian or b) Jewish every two seconds. It’s heartwarming to see her have to make her daughter eggs and her husband coffee because they’re between nannies. Her husband is right, it’s good to get back down to their roots.

Sidebar: Ramona Singer looks so good in white! Like a little angel. Remember the holiday versions of Barbie that would come out before Christmas? That’s what she looks like. A miniature version. With crazy eyes. Hopefully this party goes well. But I know it won’t, because Carole grudge holder is coming with Bethenny the shit starter/screamer, Sonja my drunk queen is also on her way and if Jules and Dorinda know what’s good for them they will STAY HOME.

Why can’t Carole just let the Countess’s stupid comments go? They weren’t even that serious. Like enough.

And now this Sonja v. B drama is annoying. TipsyGirl, DrunkenGirl, FuckYourWineGirl. B’s shit isn’t even that good, I had some cucumber flavored shit once and I wasn’t entertained. Was I supposed to be impressed? Either way, Sonja said in her own words that this was just something she signed onto. She didn’t start this wine line on her own, just to make B mad. 

I don’t think they should’ve left Sonja out of the Berkshires weekend. I don’t know if I stated my opinion on this last week. Yes, Bethenny would’ve verbally destroyed her. Who knows what would’ve happened to her? But let Sonja decide for herself whether or not she wants to be there, don’t make the decision for her. Perhaps if Sonja was there, then B would’ve came for her about this stupid TipsyGirlShit instead of the Countess for whatever complaints she had. And then things would’ve taken a different turn. It is what it is, can’t go back now. But still. I don’t think that’s fair. Regardless of people’s issues with each other, you’re all grown, you share a friend group. Sometimes you have to be around people you don’t get along with. But everyone is able to make that decision for themselves. 

So I think that Sonja is justified in her anger. And her hurt. I would be too.

Next: Jules gets angry? I’m excited to see that! And some more foolishness between the Countess and B, Sonja is surprised that the Countess thinks she’s getting married, and the ladies are heading to Mexico.

[nytobaltimore]

The Challenge: Rivals III: S28 E5

This Challenge is so goddamn weird. The episodes have been weird. And awkward. I’m not gonna rehash my feelings on any previous episodes unless it’s important. Or relevant. 

Glad the episode starts with Tony and Camilanator arguing. They really crack me up. I don’t know why but I really like Camila. I don’t even know why she’s on these challenges, I can’t remember where she came in but whatever lol

This challenge seemed kind of hard. I don’t know if I would’ve been able to do that monkey bar looking foolishness. I’m sort of rooting for Bananas/Sarah, but also Cory/Slut and Wes/Nany. I have such a hard on for the Ginger, I always have I don’t know why but he’s so adorable. Oh and Tony/Camila! The rest of them are irrelevant to me. I don’t care about your team, or your drama, or why you’re there, or Are You the One (which I will only start watching for the sake of this blog). 

I think the input of the AYTO cast was stupid, but also such a strategy. I have no emotional attachment to that show, I never even gave it a chance cause it seemed STUPID. But I get why they had to include them on the challenge. It’s simple numbers: they were running out of people to participate. People grew up, moved on with their lives, didn’t want to be on these things anymore (unless your name is Johnny Bananas). There’s so many of my favorites that I miss, that made me love this series for what it was: entertaining, fun, and different. But they’re all old now, I’ve been watching this show for sixteen years. And Road Rules is done with, so there’s no new characters coming from that. Truthfully, they need to bring that show back (which they sort of tried with the latest season of Real World), because that’s more people for the show and more ratings.

Kudos to Cory/Slut for winning. Sorry that I keep calling her that but she’s kind of annoying, but she’s growing on me. Eventually I will call her by her right name. I feel so bad for Johnny Reilly, I cannot stand Jess for the life of me. I hated her on her season of RW, and I can’t deal with her now. He keeps losing because his partner sucks. Like can he get a new partner? Where’s Hurricane Nia? They had some SERIOUS beef though, so that’s probably why she’s not there lol she would probably physically harm him again. But she’s a great competitor, and entertaining. Bunim/Murray, y’all fucked that up.

This Simone/Slut/Jaime drama is too much for my soul. Who cares who Slut fucks, doesn’t fuck, let her do what she wants! I guess I’m a hypocrite cause I only am referring to her as Slut lol so I guess I will be quiet. But I hate hate hate HATE Simone. She’s so annoying. She wants to fucking be that one girl I was obsessed with, her name is escaping me right now. Jasmine! She wants to be Jasmine so bad. She wants to be feisty and controversial and a loud mouth and the center of attention. It’s annoying. Take several seats. Did anyone even watch your season of AYTO? Like spare me.

I wish her and Tom would go in. And not because I don’t like Tom, I actually really like him (I didn’t on his season of RW, but then I started to when I saw how crazy his ex was and then saw her literally hit him on tv), and I don’t want to see him lose. But there’s been so many times when a partner has dragged down a team. Oh wait just kidding, update: THEY’RE GOING IN. I’m weak. Can I cry? Simone deserves to be knocked off her high horse. What is this conversation with Amanda? Oh she wants you guys against each other because you have strong personalities? No idiot, she wants one of you gone because you’re both literally the most annoying people I’ve ever seen on this show and I’ve been watching it since like SEASON 3. YOU GUYS GOTTA GO. Purple lipstick isn’t cute either. Get over yourself.

Also can I say how much I hate that freckled stupid bitch Amanda? SHUT UP. GET OFF MY SHOW. 

I appreciate the return of Cheyenne/Devin. I actually really like Devin, he seems like a big competitor. His partner is trying to play little miss perfect but you know, whatever. I guess she’s entertaining? She seems sort of weak sauce. I’m sure she will be out of the house in no time.

Reilly’s low blows about Jess cracks me up. I want Amanda/Nelson to leave, mostly cause I hate that show and they’re annoying. I also have a problem with his name but that’s another story. Amanda is stupid. And whiny. Don’t come for my Camilanator. No one watches your stupid ass show (except for me soon) and you’re annoying. Also Tony’s comment about Jessica not being bright cause she messes around with me is not only hashtag FACTS but the funniest thing he’s probably ever said.

Disappointed that Freckle Face and Loser won. I don’t like them. They can go. Johnny still kills me with his reaction to Jess. He’s so cute.

Next: Tom is biting off a bit more than he can chew by fighting Bananas. But I guess you do what you want when you’re poppin. Everyone’s getting naked? Nany, you should know that you can’t trust anyone besides the person you work with. I guess we’ll see what happens!

[nytobaltimore]

Real Housewives of New York City S8 E9

Or this two part episode or whatever the fuck Bravo’s doing with this “social special” before the new episode.

Poor Dorinda. She’s such a brat, she tried to have a nice party by purposely not inviting Sonja (uncool), and her friends are ratchet and don’t know how to act.

I think I’m weirdly biased. Because I have an attachment to Ramona, LuAnn and Bethenny. I’ve been watching this show for years, probably like six or seven years. I was a HUGE Jill Zarin fan (I know, I’m insane), I still follow her on twitter to this day and I did my hair for prom based on her hair from a season finale. So I’m of course attached to her friends, or former friend if you’re hip to her drama with Bethenny. So to see Bethenny and the Countess on opposite ends of whatever this argument was, made me mad.

B needs to get over herself. First she’s laughing at the Countess for living with Sonja, and saying she needs her. It’s not like Sonja is having a midlife crisis and the Countess is fixing her. She’s just supporting her in her time of need. B just kept attacking and attacking and attacking and being aggressive.

I don’t know if maybe these women aren’t getting laid, but they fight SO MUCH. I really shouldn’t complain; they fight, Bravo films, and I watch. And now blog.

Whatever. B vs. Countess was dragged from the start. Like why are we arguing? But I get why B is so upset, after everything she’s been going through with her ex husband. But dial it back a bit, she was standing up and over the Countess, who from my understanding is a very large woman and is probably not used to that, and was screaming at her about how she is a whore and a slut and a liar. Like come on. I don’t condone anyone being attacked, I don’t care who they are and what they did. It’s just not helpful for their growth, especially if they have continuos behavior that people don’t agree with. I appreciate her feeling remorse after the fact, and not just because she was super aggressive and like, beside herself. But because this is her friend, LuAnn, that she has had for like ten years. No one wants to fight with a good friend like that.

And then Carole coming in, oh I heard Bethenny arguing with a man, just kidding it was LuAnn aka LuMan. Like okay GET OVER IT she talked shit about you and your fetus boyfriend. You’re still fucking him right??? Aren’t you happy with Adam? SO WHAT’S THE PROBLEM. I’m really starting to identify with Jules. Yes she’s annoying with this whole I’m Jewish/I’m Asian thing, but she was right when she said there’s more to life than whatever these rich bitches are arguing about.

I’ve been called a number of things. So I don’t think I would care if someone called me a pedophile, slut, whore, or some racist word. Yes you get mad but eventually you need to get over it and get past it. 

Seeing Ramona Singer be all about love and light and positivity is warming to my heart. She’s out here just having a good time. She’s not arguing with anyone. I’ve never heard her make so much sense. 

What I don’t understand why the girls can’t just accept the Countess’ apologies? 

But she’s not helping by participating in her personal interviews. Or bitching in the kitchen about Bethenny. But alright already, lets get over it. 

Looks like next week, LuAnn gets herself in some more trouble. Sonja is back in the circle, and she’s about to stir things back up. Ramona has her typical comments, and Carole and Bethenny are running away from everyone.

Why. Do I watch this show?

[nytobaltimore]

Teen Mom 2 S7 E11 “Turn The Page”

Forgive me for letting this be the first show that I review, recap, whatever. I’ve been watching Teen Mom, both the original and the two sequels, since their start. I for some reason really liked this Teen Mom (version?) the most, I think because when they were 16 and Pregnant, I was sixteen and not (lawl).

Jenelle: What is wrong with Jenelle now? I feel like she’s always falling apart, whether it be due to drugs or her failure of boyfriends, or just in general. So now she’s got all these issues, only positive that I’m seeing is that her boyfriend (Dave.. David. Uncle Dave, which is weird) is super supportive. None of her exes ever took care of her like he does. And I’ve seen from random videos on the internet and little shorts that they air in commercials that he’s actually super funny. So good for her. And oh god here we go with the “I was an addict, I did heroin, I could get addicted to painkillers”. I don’t like that he kind of shut that down with the quickness and wouldn’t talk to her about it. He probably should have. I fully support just having a conversation about it. But I’m glad she’s sort of concerned, but focused on bettering her life (and more importantly, Jace’s). Sometimes Babs comes across super aggressive (which sucks for me cause I really like her), but then there’s the times when she tries to help. 

Jenelle really pissed me off when she said she couldn’t be there for Jace’s soapbox derby because she has to go on spring break. Do you have a fucking job? What do you do? Oh it was two months in advance? Fucking cancel it and be there for your son. Spring break, really? Get it together. And I like Jenelle and I DON’T KNOW WHY because she’s all over the place, always has been and always will be. But she needs to prioritize. And whatever the dynamic is with her mother and her siblings, it’s clear that Babs has a better relationship with them. Obviously because she doesn’t have custody of any of their kids, and Jenelle harbors resentment for her mother over that (among other things that aren’t shown). Babs egging her on by laughing and making it clear that she was going away for something with the sister I don’t think helped the situation, but Jenelle is forever dramatic -insert eyeroll emoji- and got all hyped up so the conversation went south. When will they ever make some sort of amends?

Only highlight was that as soon as she started crying, Kaiser came hobbling down the stairs with his cute little fat legs and immediately caressed his mother and hugged her. SO FUCKIN CUTE. I love that he’s walking and talking now. Why is he the cutest thing ever? Too bad his father is a whiny shit, and Nathan’s girlfriend is a watered down version of Jenelle (who would really want that...) and I can’t stand them both and I mute the TV when they come on.

Leah: I can’t figure out Leah for the life of me. Do you suck? Are you a good mom? Can you drive without texting with your fucking kids in the car? Are you Leah Messer? Leah Calvert? Leah Messer Calvert? I used to really like her, but she has proved to me time and time again that she’s a mixed bag. I don’t doubt that she loves her daughters, and I wish she could’ve worked things out with Jeremy because I REALLY liked him (I still have hope for them). Yes she wasn’t getting those kids to school on time or really taking care of them the way she should’ve, but I don’t think separating them from their mother was the best idea. But the court makes the decisions, not me. I can see that she’s still trying to deal with it, but she runs with every word that her kids say! News flash Leah: kids lie! Those girls will pit you guys against each other, and say whatever they think you want to hear. They are CHILDREN, they don’t really know what’s going on or what to do or who is right or wrong because you guys just keep going back and forth. You are meant to guide them and be there for them, but you and Cory and Miranda and Jeremy and Tom Dick and Harry are all over the damn place. West Virginia is a hot mess (and the only place I’ve ever experienced an unacceptable amount of racism), so hopefully you guys can figure yourselves out.

I feel like I’m biased, because I don’t really like Miranda. She rubs me the wrong way, I feel like she has a bad attitude. And she’s only gotten worse. So this video/text message debate-gate is lost on me, but I get the entertainment/drama factor. If it’s not involving the girls or Jeremy, I really don’t care much for Leah or her storyline. She was more entertaining when she was a hot mess, or, sadly, when she was a painkiller addict or whatever was wrong with her. 

Chelsea: I wish Chelsea never got pregnant by Adam’s disgusting ass. He annoys the shit out of me. Even his presence on my television is enough to make my blood boil. He had something small he could’ve done for his daughter Aubree, just to show he cares even the smallest bit and supports her, and he failed. He is a failure of a parent, I think. And I don’t know how he got such good custody of his other daughter Paislee. He really sucks. Oh your excuse for not coming to her father/daughter dance was because you had to do a lifting competition? Cry me a river, you suck.

And as far as Chelsea and Cole are concerned, I really like their relationship mostly because I REALLY like Cole. I’m glad they’re getting married, they make a cute couple. He is really a good influence on Aubree, and honestly someone needs to be the adult around here. Which is saying something because neither him or Chelsea are that adult-like, they talk in baby voices and got a pet pig, why I really don’t know. What I do know is that him and Chelsea are the most put together out of all of the couples and teen moms. They give me hope for a) a normal relationship and b) there’s another person out there for me that’s just as weird, they’re just waiting for me inside the gas station convenience store and will find me on Facebook.

Kailyn: I honestly kind of feel bad for Kail (why do I feel bad for these television princesses?). She’s got it rough right now, trying to figure out herself, taking care of her two kids while one’s father is overseas and the other one is a fat, lazy, annoying slob who somehow managed to get someone else pregnant. No but really, I can’t imagine how hard it is for her. And I heard some buzzing on the internet that her and Javi are breaking up, which sort of makes me sad cause I like him. Maybe they aren’t right together. But I remember when he first came on when they first started dating (after Jordan, who was sort of a loser). I had hope for them. I still sort of do. Unless her kids are on the screen or it involves Javi, I don’t really care about Kailyn that much. Which is unfortunate because I was really into her 16&Pregnant storyline, to me she was the most damaged, had the harder life to come from. She’s mad such drastic changes in a good way, but I don’t care about Jo or school or Vee, who needs to start using her real name cause her nickname irritates me.

Overall: Why do I still watch this show?

No, really. It really is stupid. But I’ll keep watching it, like I do all of my garbage television shows. This week’s episode gets a rating of 7/10, mostly because I wasn’t paying complete attention as I tried to type this as I watched. This is a new experience for me, so be patient with my writing skills and attention to detail. It seems like next week will be the same, as Jenelle cries to her son about not having custody (BUZZER -- WRONG), Kail talks to Javi about divorce, Leah does.....? and Chelsea continues to talk in a baby voice. 

Okay truthfully, I wasn’t paying attention that much so I missed half of the preview.

[nytobaltimore]

Changes

My roommate in college and I originally made this blog for the two of us to express our thoughts. It’s been two years since, and I don’t know what to do anymore.

There’s been a lot of changes in our lives since. I officially asked for this url from tumblr, so I feel like in order to continue I should do something else.

My other blog is a lot of my emotions. A lot of my sadness. So I think with this blog I’m going to write about the things that I do like. Movies. Television. Music. Clothes. Food. Restaurants.

There’s been so much trauma in my life over the past year. I need to focus on the good and let the bad leave my body. This moment forward, I’ll be talking on this blog about those positives. Starting with tonight (if I can get all of what I have planned done), so stay tuned?

Not sure if anyone is really reading this or looking out for this, but we will see how it goes. I also don’t remember what OWK stood for on my end, so I’m also going to try to figure out what in the fuck I meant by that.

[nytobaltimore]

New Year, New Me?

Maybe this isn’t a good idea to write. But I’m going to.

My co-author inspired me to reflect on my year and think about what I’m going to do in the next. But I honestly have no expectations. I look back on my year and I’m indifferent.

But why is that? Shouldn’t I have greater goals for myself?

Well yes, I do. But these aren’t things that can be achieved in the span of 365 days, or just by going to the gym or changing my diet plan.

I’m 21 years old. I want to experience a great love. I want to graduate college (I actually don’t because I love school but you know, whatever). I want to travel. And shop and eat good. I want to have a job that I love. I want to enjoy my time with my friends before it all truly goes downhill and I have no life or worse, KIDS.

This all takes time. 

Patience is a virtue I don’t always possess. I want all of these things ASAP, but then again I don’t.

I just want to enjoy and live my life.

So maybe this next year I’ll meet a 24 year old doctor that wants to marry me in the next couple years. Or maybe I’ll end up with my ex-boyfriend Nathan*. Maybe I’ll take a year off between undergrad and graduate school and study abroad teaching poor kids in Africa how to crochet. Or maybe I’ll win the damn lottery.

Who knows. Who knows what this next year will hold. I don’t mind, I’ll just continue to hang out and do whatever.

One day at a time.

And perhaps this last semester of undergrad will be super exciting. Or maybe it won’t. I just know I need to enjoy it while it lasts, because this final year of college is about to be over. I’ll never be able to get wasted at 10pm and be drunk until the next day at 7am, drive to my 8am and take a final ever again. I’ll never be able to call the stupid local cab company that’s never heard of any location again. Or take the sketchy ass Metro into Baltimore, only to realize I still have to take the most expensive cab ride of a lifetime home. No more designated drivers. No more Indian owned liquor store. No more Chick-fil-A (sadly), no more Wawa, no more 7/11 with a gas station, cheap gas, Safeway, Food Lion, suicide lanes, southern accents.

No more lax bros, no more baseball boys, no more Division I/II/III football, late night Taco Bell, slutty freshman, feeling ancient at a house party.

Oh my god, no more woodland creatures and deer in the road when I’m trying to drive or shitty Maryland drivers.

Maybe Sebastian* or Bernardo* will finally wake up and realize I’m the coolest girl on the planet and wife me up. Or maybe they’ll continue to mind-fuck me. Or maybe I’ll continue to jump between them like a two cent hooker.

Who knows. Whatever.

I might’ve had too much to drink tonight so I’m being dramatic. I’m almost positive none of this makes sense.

Back to my Law and Order marathon.

xoxoOWK

*every one of my suitors and friends will have code names, just in case one of the goobers finds this blog. Which I doubt they will, but just to be safe.

[nytobaltimore]

Welcome 2014!

I have a comfort zone. It protects me, and it hurts me. I'm sharing some of my New Year resolutions so maybe they could help you too. Hey, its a new year anything is possible. 

So, for my 1) NYR(New Years resolution) i choose to step out of my comfort zone...even if its just a few inches...

2) Invest more! I look through my closet day after day and get tired of my clothes! But, i never seem to get tired of the one's i spent some money on like my Celine blazer, i mean thats a classic piece. it's better to have one expensive item than 40 basic items. I'm totally splurging on that dress in Nordstrom i saw!

3) Date. My mom always yells at me not to turn down guys i don't know, i mean you aren't marrying them she would always tell me. Yep mom you are totally right...Why not go out for a drink? i mean if i don't like the guy i still get a free drink out of it..or a story?

4) Walk away. This is most likely my biggest weakness. i care too much. If i love you, i will always. I need to learn when to walk away from a person who doesn't treat me right. This could be a relationship or even a friendship. If this person doesn't make you happy, and causes constant negativity why have them in your life? You need to cut out the bad in order to make room for the good. 

5) Chances. I never often take chances, i'm afraid to get risks. What happens if it doesn't work out the way i want? Or what happens is it does.....Every good thing comes from a risk. If you like the guy in your class, ask him to hangout! Its the last semester! Why not. I mean really what is there to lose.

6) Hug more. Simple, but effective. I have a hard time showing affection..i'm wierd. Watch out a hugger is going to be on the loose, aka me :) 

7) Never let things be unsaid. Tomorrow short. If you love someone...and you realize it in that moment...tell them. 

8) Believe you are good enough. No one else is meant for that job...but YOU! Don't let anyone stop your shine.

9) Fight for what you want. No one will hand it to you..."Don't except people to understand your grind when god didn't give them your vision."

10) Chase your dream. God gave you two feet for a reason. 

[nytobaltimore]

"The Nice Guy"

It was Thanksgiving eve, and me and my friends journeyed on our way to Atlantic City. We got a free room at the Borgata so we figured why the hell not. This was a last minute thing so i didn't have time to buy a "basic" black dress nor was i the kind of girl to follow what the rest of NJ wears. So i wore a silky black top, leather leggings, and my finest Burberry heels. Basically, i wasn't basic with a cookie cutter Forever 21 outfit on. As if(yuck). The usual we all pregammed in our room aka finished a bottle, and made our way onto the Pool After Dark at Harrahs. 

OK, so Harrahs is kinda blurry i remember walking in being friends with the bouncer and meeting Doug. Apparently Doug got my number....and we were texting. I don't remember this but my phone said so. 

Flash forward 20 minutes and i'm sitting in a sectioned off VIP section. I don't know how this happens but i don't hate it. I'm with my bestfriends and cute guys with free bottles, therefore i'm a happy camper.

So, long story short i turn to my right and start chatting with this guy sitting next to me. I don't really remember what we said or his name, but he was cute, and dressed cute, and i was drunk so whatever. I really don't remember much of that night except begging my friends to take me to ben & jerry's at the end of the night. Typical.

Next day, i really didn't plan to hear from this kid again, hey it's AC! 

But, the next day i got a text telling me how nice it was to meet me, and making sure i got home okay that night. A nice gesture i gave him one point. 

He continually texted me just to talk about life. This kid actually wanted to get to know me. Whats wierder is i loved talking to him, he was different, and it was easy to have a conversation with him. We later started to talk about everything books, relationships, school, everything. It was nice to wake up to good morning texts everyday....Than it got boring. What can i say i get bored easily, my biggest weakness. But, i did still appreciate them.

He asked me out to dinner three days later. I told him i couldn't because i was in school, but when i came home i would gladly take him up on the offer. The next text was one i didn't except. "I'm in the air force, and will be back in Missouri." That was a shocker. 

He still asked if he could talk to me, and asked if it would be okay if he texted me to talk? I couldn't believe someone actually enjoyed talking to me so much. I mean yeah some guys love to talk, but this kid actually appreciated having someone to text. He was so appreciative and emotional, it was amazing to see. I think military guys are different. They appreciate the littlest things. Things i take for granted everyday. On Christmas this kid watched a movie by himself, thousands of miles away from home, while i complained that i was eating too much. I mean really this kid made himself a hotdog, and i'm complaining and not appreciating the 5 cannoli's i stuffed in my mouth? Ridiculous.

This guy really is the definition of the nice guy. He's everything a girl wants on paper. In highschool i was the typical "bad" girl (a chapter i closed when i started college, well somewhat lol). I went for guys who were douche bags one's that didn't just like me, but also every other girl who walked past them. They told me whatever i wanted to hear, and i became whoever they wanted me to be. I must say i'm not proud, but it made me such a strong independent women today. Okay, i sound like a walking Destiny's Child song, but its true! Lets say i've never encountered the nice guy, but ofcourse i did. I just didn't appreciate him. I mean really who does in Highschool? 

But, i do now. It feels so good to meet someone who treats you right, and wants to take you on dates. 

When you meet the nice guy you realize how your supposed to be treated. 

I don't know what tomorrow will bring, there will be a thousand more guys...but this nice little military man taught me how a 21 year old is supposed to be treated, and most importantly reminded me to appreciate everything i have in my life. It's most than what people have in theirs.

So ladies go for the nice guy you deserve it.

I'll end with one of my favorite quotes from Perks of being a Wallflower. "We accept the love we think we deserve".

[nytobaltimore]

Random Late Night Texts

“Wanna come over and kick me in the balls?”

My life. This is what someone actually finds acceptable to text me at 11PM on a Saturday night.

I’m not even sure where to start with this. My mind is literally blown.

So the gem of a gentleman that sent this to me I’ve considered an “ex-boyfriend” for the better part of seven years. But he’s not my ex. We never REALLY dated. Unfortunately he never did me the displeasure of having to explain to people that I like him and enjoy his company.

This will actually be the longest story in all of America, so I’ll try to keep it short. I’m almost positive I will talk about him again and again, since he is like the cockroach in WALL-E that just never seemed to die. His name is Percy* (not real, but for some reason I’m gonna protect his useless ass identity) and he’s my weirdo “ex-boyfriend”. I met him when I was thirteen turning fourteen, freshman in highschool, with no fashion sense or any sense for that matter. He was seventeen, a senior, and we met through a mutual friend/his family friend.

I am currently 21. He’s 24. This has been the longest relationship I’m not in.

He was honestly the weirdest person I have ever seen in my life. And I loved it. Why, I don't know. Let's chalk it up to teenage hormones gone wrong. He messed around with me, pushed me back and forth over the course of two years before I finally had the sense that a) this wasn’t healthy for me b) he’s driving me nuts/he’s insane and c) this is bullshit. This isn’t love. This isn’t anything. How could I let someone affect my moods like this?

So I moved on, got countless boyfriend’s and learned to stop loving this creature.

But. He’s a cockroach. He’s the devil. He never goes away. He always finds a way to worm himself back into my heart and my damn phone book. If I delete him, if I ignore him: he finds a way. He ALWAYS finds a way.

Does he love me? Most likely. Indefinitely. But this asshole has no way of properly expressing that expect for to treat me like shit. So will I ever believe him? No. He couldn’t change his attitude, appearance, personality, gain all the riches in the world and finally move out of his controlling mother’s house in order for me to welcome him back into my heart and my world.

But we’re friends. He was probably my first love. I can’t stand the damn kid but I will always have a soft spot for him. I don’t love him the way I used to. If anything I just care about him. I’m not heartless, I don’t ACTUALLY hate anyone. But I DO like him.

He can be funny. And when he’s not being a selfish pedophile (joke… kind of. Ok, it’s not funny) pretentious dick, he can be caring and thoughtful. But part of me will never get over the years of hurt he had inflicted on me. Part of me will never fully trust a male, half of which is due to Daddy issues of my own that I unfortunately have, and half of which is his fault.

“You hate me, don’t you”

No, Perce. I don’t. I hate what you did to me. I hate that I had to experience it in order to find love of the right kind, with the right people. I hate that I fear for my future daughter to ever meet a boy like you (keyword: boy, not man), because he will crush her like you crushed me.

I hate that you text me, yelling at me about why don’t I hang out with you, etc etc. You whine. A lot. And when I’m with you (unfortunately, this was recently) you make me feel like I’m about to make a big mistake or take ten steps back. I hate that you STILL to this day make me feel like the bad guy, even when YOU’RE the bad guy.

I don’t hate that I prevailed in this “situation”, and I have to call it a “situation” for this reason only: you called the night of my friend’s 21st birthday and when she drunkenly answered and talked to you, calling you my ex-boyfriend and you soberly told her we’ve never dated in my entire life.

To which my friend hung up on you, after calling you a piece of shit, because she’s a smart girl.

So I guess in the grand scheme of things, this or that or whatever, was nothing. You did nothing but teach me a lesson, then. I will never know the right way to explain you to friends or future boyfriends that ask, or how to respond to texts like this. But I have plenty of time to practice?

The point is, Percy is crazy, I’ve moved on, I’m done, but he will be back and I will be right back here complaining. Back to square one.

Whatever. Thanks for the Netflix, Perce.

xoOWK

ps. I guess the bigger problem at hand here is that my “ex” gets sexual pleasure from being kicked in the balls but we can address that another day.