occasionallyanauthor - Tumblr blog

[occasionallyanauthor]

you are not alone

i ask myself this question, it’s one i can’t deny;

i’ve seen my transformation, it’s right before my eyes.

and yet i will no answer, for i really feel afraid;

“is this truly you? are you happy inside?”

i’ve struggled with my sorrows, and dabbled with my fears,

and when they come tomorrow, i am still stuck here.

i’ve never felt so lonely, it’s within my soul;

because i’ve lost myself, i have lost all control.

i’ve struggled with my identity, with who i want to be;

and facing my hypocrisy, i just want to be free.

no longer just a pet, a slave to my insecurities,

for now all i want is to be irrevocably me

and as i write these words, or lyrics they may be,

i sit here thinking silently, “will i ever be happy?”

these thoughts that are inside of me,

these thoughts shunned by society,

are they really mine, do i share them?

i know there’s someone out there, 

someone i cannot hear.

they struggle with themselves, with what they hold dear.

but know you’re not alone, that echo in your head,

just know that i am here, to take your hand in my hand.

-abi

[occasionallyanauthor]

you are not alone

i ask myself this question, it’s one i can’t deny;

i’ve seen my transformation, it’s right before my eyes.

and yet i will no answer, for i really feel afraid;

“is this truly you? are you happy inside?”

i’ve struggled with my sorrows, and dabbled with my fears,

and when they come tomorrow, i am still stuck here.

i’ve never felt so lonely, it’s within my soul;

because i’ve lost myself, i have lost all control.

i’ve struggled with my identity, with who i want to be;

and facing my hypocrisy, i just want to be free.

no longer just a pet, a slave to my insecurities,

for now all i want is to be irrevocably me

and as i write these words, or lyrics they may be,

i sit here thinking silently, “will i ever be happy?”

these thoughts that are inside of me,

these thoughts shunned by society,

are they really mine, do i share them?

i know there’s someone out there, 

someone i cannot hear.

they struggle with themselves, with what they hold dear.

but know you’re not alone, that echo in your head,

just know that i am here, to take your hand in my hand.

-abi

[occasionallyanauthor]

So This is Love

1,366 words

Taegi modern-day Cinderella AU

Constructive criticism is welcome, but please don’t be super harsh this is my first fic.

So This is Love: Kim Taehyung was effortlessly beautiful and could steal anyone’s man in a heartbeat. One problem: his brothers Seokjin and Namjoon had him deal with the brunt of the housework. Taehyung never leaves the house except to go to the market and search for his prince charming, his knight in shining armor. Little does Taehyung know his prince lives next door.

or: the very, very loosely based cinderella taegi au in which kim taehyung is an idiot and min yoongi is certified boyfriend material.

        Dishes. Taehyung’s worst fear (not really, but they were his least favorite chore). The sink was loaded up high and the dishwasher had broken the day before. Shit. He got to work, mentally rearranging his schedule and eventually deciding his trip to the farmer’s market and grocery store would have to wait until tomorrow, even though he was out of sugar and needed some to complete the icing for his brother Jin’s birthday. Taehyung decided to ask one of his neighbors, but who to ask: the grouchy old couple on the left or the mystery man on the right that he’d only ever seen the day he moved in? Mystery man it is Taehyung decided seeing as it was the safest option. The couple would only bash him for not being married at the ripe old age of 21. How caring. 

     Yoongi’s doorbell rang around 5:00 o’clock on a lazy Saturday night, and he expected none other than the pizza guy at his door. He did not expect to open the door to see the male Aphrodite reincarnate at his door. He also did not expect an energetic pomeranian to be nipping at his toes. “Tannie! Don’t bite the neighbor!” Taehyung scolded, but Yeontan was relentless in his attack so Taehyung settled for holding him instead. “Hello?” Yoongi questioned, slightly shy at the fact that this beautiful man was in front of him while he was wearing a pair of ill-fitting sweatpants and an old university hoodie. “Ah. Hello. Sorry about Yeontan, he gets to hyper sometimes. Uh, I’m from next door and I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of sugar and I just feel so-” “Yeah that’s fine. Come in,” Yoongi interrupted before Taehyung could get more flustered than he already was. Poor boy was shaking about as much as a leaf in the wind. 

     Taehyung felt grateful for that as he followed Yoongi to his kitchen and promptly took a seat at the breakfast bar with Yeontan in his arms. “I’m Kim Taehyung by the way, sorry for not introducing myself earlier. And this is my fluffy baby Yeontan. Sorry again about him biting at your toes, I haven’t had the time to teach him any manners.” “No, it’s fine. I’m surprised my dog Holly wasn’t up and at the door the second I opened it. I’m Min Yoongi. Also, may I ask why you need the sugar? You can have it, but I want to know why.” “It’s my brother Seokjin-hyung’s birthday and I ran out of sugar and didn’t have enough for the icing and I didn’t have enough time to go into town.” Yoongi hands Taehyung the sugar and his phone too, with a mumbled “in case you ever need more sugar.” Taehyung smiled at that, not believing that the cute, fair-skinned boy in front of him wanted his number. Taehyung put in his name and number, along with a cake emoji for good measure. Yoongi blushed and saw him out the door. When the doorbell rang about 5 minutes later, Yoongi was hopeful for Taehyung, but alas it was the pizza gut he had waited so long for.

---

     It was a rainy Friday when Taehyung next showed up at Yoongi’s doorstep with Yeontan in tow, claiming that he needed butter. Okay, so he didn’t really need butter but he can’t help coming over, the mystery man is really cute and it’s not like he has the time to go in town and get in on the action. So once in the kitchen, Taehyung tells Yoongi that he doesn’t need butter but just wanted an excuse to come and see him, to which Yoongi just smiles and laughs, his gums on full display. Taehyung’s chest flutters and butterflies erupt in his stomach only to realise that oh no, I have a crush on the not so mystery man. 

     “So,” Yoongi starts, “Why didn’t you just text me?” “It’s not the same.” “Okay, so why not call me?” “It’s still not the same.” “Okay, so how about facetime?” “Hyung!” Taehyung groans, “It’s just not the same.” Yoongi giggles (giggles), and Taehyung thinks that this may be the sweetest torture one could ever endure. 

     They talk for hours, and Yeontan and Holly play together on the floor. Yoongi learns that Taehyung’s birthday is coming up in the next couple of weeks and that Taehyung will be 22 and almost every aspect of Taehyung’s bright, colorful life (Taehyung makes it seem like that, even though all he ever does is be a glorified housewife). Taehyung learns that Yoongi is a composer and songwriter for some of Korea’s finest agencies and that Yoongi’s cheeks are in fact as squishy as they look. 

---

It’s Taehyung’s birthday and Yoongi comes over that morning to find him doing chores. Unacceptable. So, much to Taehyung’s dismay, Yoongi takes his ‘new best friend’ (Taehyung’s words, not his) out to town to have some fun for his birthday. Yoongi makes sure that they stop by the grocery store and get butter and sugar before heading of to the farmer’s market to fill the depleted shelves of the Kim household’s pantry. Yoongi also takes Taehyung clothes shopping because all the boy ever wears are white t-shirts and some old grey sweatpants. Yoongi buys everything before Taehyung can so much get his wallet out, so Taehyung insists on paying for lunch. The two of them meet up with some of Yoongi’s other friends and Taehyung’s old friend. Taehyung was shocked to see his old friend Park Jimin sitting at the table, and introduced Taehyung to Jeon Jeongguk, his boyfriend who also happened to be a friend of Yoongi’s. Yoongi’s other friend Jung Hoseok was there. They ate lunch at a cafe and reminisced of the old times until Taehyung got a phone call from his brother Namjoon asking where he was. Taehyung said he had to leave, but Yoongi insisted on taking him one more place. They ended up in front of a shoe store, where Yoongi bought Taehyung some nice sneakers to wear instead of the same worn-down ones he always wore. 

---

     It was around 7:00 pm that night when Yoongi texted Taehyung asking him to come over, and to ‘wear something nice.’ Taehyung wore his new sneakers (a prized possession of his), a sweater, and some jeans. Taehyung walked to Yoongi’s house and barely opened the door before a chorus of “Surprise!” rang out. Taehyung nearly cried, it was his first birthday party since his parents had died. Yoongi whisked him away and they sat at a table with Jimin, Jeongguk, and Hoseok. They drank until nearly midnight, and Taehyung had realized how late it was. His brothers were going to be pissed with him being out so late, claiming that he was neglecting his duties and disobeying his curfew. Even though he was now 22, his brothers still treated him like a child and never let him go out and do anything by himself. Taehyung saw that the clock had just struck midnight and bolted out the door, losing a shoe in the process. Taehyung returned home a little late, and his brothers decided to punish him by locking him in his room. 

---

     Taehyung swore he was going to die of boredom. He was alone in his room without his phone and without connection to the outside world. Well, he was until there was a yell, a crash, and the sound of footsteps clamoring up the stairs. Taehyung stayed still, afraid he was in yet more trouble. However, Taehyung was nothing but relieved when he saw Yoongi open the door. “Yoongi-hyung! What are you doing here?” “Returning your shoe,” Yoongi said, while slipping it onto Taehyung’s foot. “Y-Yoongi-hyung?” “Taehyung,” Yoongi started, “When you first came to my door asking for sugar I thought ‘I really like this guy.’ Now, Tae, (Taehyung giggled at that nickname) I think I more than like you. Taehyung, I think I love you. Will you be my boyfriend?” Taehyung gasped (only a little bit since he wasn’t that surprised) and leaned down to Yoongi. He whispered a yes, and the two shared a kiss on the floor of his bedrooom.

[occasionallyanauthor]

an introduction to myself

hello person reading this. my name is abi, and this is my secondary. you can follow my primary if you want here, but it’s pretty crap. there’s not too much to say for myself, but if you’re here it’s probably because you’re a bts fan, so i’ll give you a rundown on my bts preferences. i’m taehyung and yoongi biased, but i love all of the boys equally. my favorite ships are namjin and jikook even though i really don’t like to ship that much (i mean i do but i feel like it’s kind of weird when people push too much because they are real people). if you made it this far then i congratulate you for making it. i know this was pretty dry and boring.