orangesocksonmyeyes - Tumblr blog

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

I'm like if a girl had the urge to scream and break something all the time but stays quiet instead

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

"Perhaps they were right putting love into books. Perhaps it could not live anywhere else."

― William Faulkner

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

THAT. ARM.

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

The New Moon

Rafe Cameron x Goth!Fem!Reader

ᴄᴡ: none

ᴡᴄ: 1k

ɴᴏᴛᴇ: this is part one of i dont know how many, but i’m seeing where it takes me! there aren’t any physical descriptions this chapter except for the color of clothes and the reader wearing makeup.

next →

Rafe had known you since senior year high school. If he’d paid more attention he would have realized you’d worked at the country club long before he transferred to public school. The original plan was to have him attend one year outside of the academy in public school to teach him a lesson. Ward was tired of his antics, even if they hadn’t reached extreme points yet.

Rose, on the other hand, had whined and moaned against the decision. Imagine how it would look with Rafe being at public school, Ward couldn’t have cared less. He believed a punishment was needed and he made sure it was delivered. Rafe had reluctantly showed up to public school for a singular day, only to go home and beg his dad to not send him back. He promised to straighten and do whatever necessary. Anything was better than enduring a second day.

After long deliberation (and bribing), Ward had finally relented, warning Rafe to shape up or else he’d go back there. While Rafe hadn’t exactly fixed everything, he became adept at not getting caught. He’d learned from that one day of public school. Don’t draw unnecessary attention to yourself. To anyone else his reaction may have seemed overdramatic, and it was, but to Rafe public school was haunting.

He’d gone there expecting that people would recognize him and be intrigued, instead, he was another face in the crowd. The school was located towards the middle of the island, filled with all the students that couldn’t afford the academy. To them Rafe was a nobody. He had no power there. He especially had no power on how others judged him.

In the academy Rafe could freely snark at anyone he pleased. In public school, Rafe had been shoulder checked numerous times, snickered at from mouths behind hands, or completely disregarded. He despised it. He missed when people looked up to him, or were too scared to start something with him. Rafe had realized how isolating it felt when he entered the cafeteria to see groups of people already arranged at tables.

No one welcomed him. There was no fanfare. He was only met with suspicious glares. He deserved them no doubt, but suddenly being at the bottom of the social ladder was jarring. Rafe stood there to glare back at the room, as if it would help somebody invite him over, when someone abruptly slammed into his back.

“Fuck, sorry-“ A voice cursed behind him. Rafe turned around to spout out an insult when his eyes landed on you. Oh. was his first thought. There you stood decked out in all black attire. All the intricate layers and unique cuts fit together like you’d spent hours curating the perfect outfit. Even your makeup seemed expertly crafted to fit your vibe. Rafe could only imagine how long it took you to get dressed. He was accustomed to people spending long periods of time to get ready, but none of them looked like you.

Rafe wondered if anyone else dressed like you here. Was it more accepted in public school? Not that it mattered when you were right in front of him. He had never met a goth person, and had never realized how attractive he would think your style was. Usually his type were kook girls who liked him, but damn. “Are you just going to stare?” quickly snapped him out of his thoughts.

“What?” he responded cluelessly. You laughed—a genuine laugh! It wasn’t directed at him, but rather at the situation itself. Rafe watched as your hand covered your smile, already wanting to see it again. As you shook your head his blue eyes locked on yours. “Look, don't bother with the cafeteria, it's a shit show. Anyone who’s not boring sits in the courtyard.” He nodded slowly, “And are you one of those people?”

Rafe had expected bite in your response to his prompt but you merely shrugged. “Hmm, maybe.” He grinned dumbly as you walked away to join the line for lunch. “Will you be out there?” Rafe called out to your back. “You’ll see, Rafe Cameron.” He paused when he was met with his full name. You knew him and yet he didn’t know you. Rafe had wanted all day for someone to know who he was, but now he was silently cursing his family. He could only hope you didn’t know some of the shit he’s pulled.

Pushing away the thoughts, his feet hurried out to the courtyard to find a seat under a tree. Rafe waited and waited to see your figure step out of the doors. But as the bell rang you still hadn’t shown up. He really hadn’t wanted to dwell on the fact that the one positive thing about the day had slipped through his fingers.

As burdens continued to piled up onto his lap his day spiraled downhill. The teachers were just as relentless as the students, dumping an overwhelming chunk of makeup work on him. If the front doors weren’t locked Rafe may have made a desperate run for it. He had never realized the stress of public school, finding himself mentally praying for time to swiftly pass by. As the end of the day rolled around he sprinted to his car, which was boxed in by cars on either side, and sped home.

After the scare and being able to go back to private school things started to settle. After a few days, and a few dreams featuring you as the star of them, he went to the country club to golf on the weekend. Rafe needed the break and the opportunity to rant about public school to Topper and Kelce. It was senior year for fucks sake, why should he had to even go there in the first place!

The rounds flew by on the course, leaving him thirsty. Rafe unsuspectingly made his way towards the bar only to stop short at sight of the person serving an older man. Fuck, it was you. And what else could Rafe do except turn the other way and speed off, not catching your intrigued gaze.

You giggled under your breath seeing Rafe shove his hands in his pockets and dash the other way. Did you intimidate him that much? You truly couldn’t remember anything bad happening between the two of you. What a strange guy. The man you served, Bob, caught your eye, following your view to see what you were looking at. “Oh, that Cameron boy?”

You hummed and looked at the man. “Yeah…is he always like that?” “Weird and shifty?” Well, you wouldn’t have described him like that, “Sure.” Bob swirled his glass before sipping from it for dramatic effect making you suppress an eye roll. “Yeah mostly. Make sure to stay away from that boy. He isn’t known for kindness.” Huh. That was certainly not how he had acted towards you. If anything he seemed dumb in a sweet way.

Your eyes found their way back to where he was making an excuse of why he hadn’t gotten a drink to Topper and Kelce. Interesting.

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

"I have buried you in every place l've been. You keep ending up in my shaking hands."

Bon Iver, A song for a lover of long time ago

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

"Sorrow compressed my heart, and I felt I would die, and then... Well, then I woke up."

-Fyodor Dostoevsky, "The Dream of a Ridiculous Man"

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

"what do you do for a living?" Oh I am a professional hopeless romantic and I read books and cry in my free time.

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

Full offense but your writing style is for you and nobody else. Use the words you want to use; play with language, experiment, use said, use adverbs, use “unrealistic” writing patterns, slap words you don’t even know are words on the page. Language is a sandbox and you, as the author, are at liberty to shape it however you wish. Build castles. Build a hovel. Build a mountain on a mountain or make a tiny cottage on a hill. Whatever it is you want to do. Write.

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

masterlist »

who i currently write for: rafe cameron, jj maybank, finnick odair, peter parker (specify which!), eddie munson, matt sturniolo.

just bc they aren’t listed doesn’t mean i won’t write for them!

requests are open! rules

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

current writes:

⇘ rafe cameron ⇙

right side of my neck

right side of my neck pt.2

📻title inspo: here!

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

rules for requests!

i will not write non-con, r*pe, or incest. i am fine with dark fics but don’t take it too far.

i am okay with writing for villainous/antagonist characters but i may tweak their personalities & actions a bit to fit the storyline!

you can request characters i don’t have listed on my masterlist!

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

when i want fluff/angst fics and all i’m getting is smut

the struggle is real

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

right side of my neck pt2

bf!rafe cameron x gf!reader

warnings: mentions of violence (not against reader), slight manipulation, toxic relationship blah blah typical rafe stuff

this isn’t proof read SUE ME

after a lot of convincing and possible begging, rafe finally agreed to not do anything.

i eventually passed out in his arms with my head tucked against his chest. he was a night owl. most nights when i slept, he didn’t. we were opposites in many ways and sometimes i wondered how we became a functioning couple.

i stirred in my sleep when i felt the bed dip and arms return around me. this time they were cold. my eyes flickered open to see rafe already looking at me with sleepy eyes. his hair was disheveled and sweat glistened on his forehead in the dim lighting of the moon.

he must’ve noticed my staring because he quickly started running his hand through my hair, something he often does to get me to fall asleep.

it almost worked, had it not been for the slight wince i saw on his face when i leaned towards his hand.

i quickly sat up and clicked on the bedside lamp, grabbing him by the wrist and pulling his hand into view. fresh bruises and cuts littered his knuckles, the skin dry and cracked from the cold.

i should’ve made him promise.

he tucked his other arm behind his head, as if nothing was wrong at all. “are you serious?” i muttered, dropping his hand as i stared at him. he stared back at me, laying his fallen hand flat on his stomach. “you said you wouldn’t do anything, rafe.” i put my fingers to my temples in frustration.

rafe drummed his fingers along his stomach. “relax. he won’t tell.” he said nonchalantly.

he wont tell. good, so he’s alive.

“that’s not even the point.” i muttered, glancing at the clock that read 4:15am. i fell asleep at one, he was gone for three hours doing who knows what to that guy.

rafe leaned on his elbows as he sat up. he reached for my hands, i pulled away.

“baby, i did this for you.” he said, his voice cracking.

his looked at me with puppy dog eyes.

despite how i wanted to react, my heart ached at his words. i often had to remind myself that rafe didn’t think like i did. or like anyone did.

i sighed and pulled him into my chest by the nape of his neck, his looped his arms around my waist as i held him. “did anyone see you?” i whispered.

“do they ever?” he hummed.

cocky bastard.

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ermm nobody beat me up for this being SO short 😃 this is for @iwasunderduress again and any1 else who showed love on part one. I LOVE U 😜

drew looks so fine in that pic hello ? #drewstarkeymunch

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

writing fanfiction is just. i’m being so creative and original. i’m plagiarizing everyone by accident. i’m a genius. i’m cringe. i’m too angsty. i’m too cheesy. this is not in character. it doesn’t matter that it’s not in character because these are my characters now. i love my hobby. this is the worst possible use of my time. i’m seeking validation. i’m projecting my own personal problems onto this story and i’m barely hiding it. i know so many words and i’m using all of them wrong. im on tumblr posting about it instead of writing it.

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

me when I’m filled with an indescribable amount of yearning for a fictional man

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

not enough eerie girls out there these days. eerie girls rise

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

reblog if you’ve read fanfictions that are more professional, better written than some actual novels. I’m trying to see something

[orangesocksonmyeyes]

right side of my neck

bf!rafe cameron x gf!reader.

warnings: rafe cameron is a warning himself but depictions of anger issues, violence, grumpy x sunshine are also all included!!

rafe’s right hand rested on my thigh as his left one held the steering wheel. his grip on me was gentle, but the grip he had on the wheel made his already bruised knuckles turn white. i was worried it would cause them to bleed again. “rafe,” i said, gaining no response as he stared straight ahead at the road with a sharp expression on his face. i slid my hand on top of his that was on my thigh, interlocking our fingers. this seemed to catch his attention because he gave my hand a squeeze and glanced over at me.

his jaw unclenched. “sorry baby, what did you say?” he asked, his voice as calm as ever.

i knew that tone all too well. he was trying to keep me convinced that everything was fine, that he wasn’t angry anymore and that he definitely wasn’t going to do anything he shouldn’t. again.

the bruises on his knuckles always proved him otherwise.

“your knuckles,” i gestured with a nod, grazing my thumb across the back of his hand. “you’re gonna break the skin again.”

rafe sighed but loosened his grip on the wheel anyway. he gave me a glance once again. “don’t worry about me, how’s your cheek feel?”

oh right, i was hurt too. i instinctively raised a hand up to my face and winced as i grazed over the bruised area, the memories of what had happened flooding my head.

an hour earlier

the absence of rafe had already made the spot on the couch next to me colder, i wrapped my arms around myself in a hug. he had wandered off to find topper for reasons i wasn’t aware of, but he insisted i stay put. i assumed it was because he knew how much i hated parties. and crowds.

i was pulled from my thoughts when a weight sunk down in the seat next to me, close enough that our thighs were touching. i knew it wasn’t rafe without looking. my eyes trailed over to the man, who looked like an average frat guy. he had a scruffy face and a semi-lean frame. he smiled at me and i politely mumbled an “excuse me,” and scooted into the next open seat beside me. my heart dropped as he too, scooted down with me.

i cupped my clammy hands together, scanning the room for any familiar face. none. i didn’t want to run and risk the chance of him following me and catching me alone.

rafe will be back soon. i kept telling myself.

the man leaned a little closer, alcohol on his breath as he spoke. “what’s a pretty girl like you doing sittin’ here all alone?” he slurred out, throwing his arm across the back of the couch behind me. i leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees so i could lean as far away from his arm as possible.

he must’ve noticed my mannerisms because he frowned and let out a little grunt. “cmon, don’t be like that..” he traced a single finger across me shoulder and thats when i jerked away, slapping him in the face. it didn’t do much, except severely piss him off.

he hissed, gripping his cheek. “the fuck is your problem, bitch?” he yelled, gaining the attention of other party-goers as he stood and inched closer to my face. he shoved me by my shoulders to the floor, my face coming in contact with the table and opening a small gash on my cheek. i felt tears filling my eyes as the pain grew.

a couple people ran to my side and tended to me but not before gasping and jerking their heads back over to the man, causing me to do the same. rafe had the guy on the floor, straddling him as he switched from fist to fist, landing punches until blood could be seen literally pooling from the man’s mouth.

kelce and topper quickly appeared, immediately trying to pry rafe off the man. “rafe, let go!” topper pleaded, his expression frantic as he saw the man’s consciousness slowly start to fade. rafe eventually did, unwillingly of course. he harshly shrugged topper and kelce off of him as he stood, his chest heaving as he stared down at the guy. he dipped down, yanking the man’s head up by his collar so he could meet his eyes - though, i’m not sure if the man could even see him straight.

“i’ll fucking kill you, do you hear me? glance in her direction again.” he growled, dropping the guy’s collar, his head thumping as it hit the floor. he groaned in pain, turning to the side to cough up more blood.

rafe was beside me in seconds, the crowd immediately dispersing away from him after they had just witnessed what he was capable of. his hand cupped my uninjured cheek as he examined the other one. “you okay, baby?” he asked, stroking my hair and scanning my eyes for an answer.

i just nodded, a few stray tears slipping from my eyes. he sighed, pressing a kiss to my hair. “don’t cry,” he whispered against the strands.

present time

“does it hurt? keep pressure on it.” rafe insisted, his gaze on me more than the road at this point.

many ways that people assumed i was treated by rafe could never be more wrong. he was gentle, respectful, and extremely patient with me - despite how he was with others.

i held the warm rag close to my wound, fiddling anxiously with the holes of my jeans with my other hand. “rafe..” i said, continuing when he hummed in response. “you aren’t gonna.. do anything, right?” i asked, finally looking over at him. he was silent for a bit, which answered my question.

“i wouldn’t do anything that wasn’t deserved.” he said.

not the answer i wanted to hear.

i sighed, my eyes on the road as we turned on my street. rafe parked in front of my house and we both sat in silence. his eyes piercing through the side of my head.

“i don’t want you to do anything.” i finally said. “he got what he deserved, tonight. you can’t go back to jail, rafe. there’s no more warnings, you heard shoupe.” i looked at him. he was smirking.

that bastard snickered.

“you’re sweet,” he hummed, his hand reaching out to tuck my hair behind my ear. he leaned in, pecking my lips before pulling back to speak.

“i can easily get rid of shoupe too, baby.”

———————————————————————

srry if this seems rushed pls bare with me as this is my first public fic, usually i only write for myself and the voices in my head fr 😭

also keep in mind that i adjusted rafe’s personality (clearly) to fit a more romantic style 😏🙏

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this is for @iwasunderduress bc she has begged me to post my ideas FOREVER 😊