orybzf

[orybzf]

hate when I see the comment "big news for unemployed people" on internet drama. really discounting the dedication of us chronically online employed people. does my 15 minutes in a public restroom at work scrolling online mean nothing to you...

[orybzf]

truly do not understand workplace drama. we're stuck here doing stupid bullshit for 8 hours and you want to make it worse? But on the other hand I love hearing about arguments that are not and never will be my problem

[orybzf]

Inspired by:

As a princess, I know my duties.

Each day I woke up at 6 am, I take a bath, I brush my teeth, then my servants choose my wear for the day. At 9 am I am ready to start my day. Meetings, royal appearances, responding to letters, entertaining foreign guests. Once a visiting princess of another nation whined about the protocols and how suffocating it feels something to be a princess. I nodded and agreed with her just to be nice but I honestly don't see it. I like my job wholeheartedly. I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

As I am brushing my hair, something I like to do frequently these days, I look towards the grand golden-hinged doorframe, a knight stationed stoically there wearing a complete black iron armor, and a sword hanging in their waist. I think they are avoiding my gaze? I can't tell what they are thinking nor what expression they are making under that helmet. Sometimes it annoy me, other time, it comforts me. However my knight is a weird one.

A week ago, in a beautiful day like this one, I was kidnapped by a group of revoltists as I was having a walk in the royal forest, my knight indeed was there, however I wanted a moment of peace alone and I asked them to stand by. Hesitant at first they refused. But a secret technique I learned from my mother when my father -The late king- got worried about her is to pout and, in her words, “act like a hungry cat”. 

And it worked, with the knight agreeing to be near me close enough to act quickly if something happens but far enough so I can have my peace. 

But alas, I got myself kidnapped with the men taking me to their hidden bunker in what I later found out was in the hidden magic forest between our country and the western one. 

I was what they needed, a political bargaining chip to threaten the queen to step down.

Several cold and empty days followed, they didn't feed me nor they spare me from the beatings. At a point I thought of ending my life with scraps of glass that were lying around. It was a rational decision since my life would not be guaranteed if my mother actually backs down so why not go to the next life with dignity. 

As I picked up the largest and sharpest glass shard that I found a mild earthquake made me drop it, the earthquake didn't last too long only a few seconds, minutes later another earthquake happened and as the last one it only lasted a few seconds, and another one happened, and another then another followed by another. 

I realized after the fourth one that it was not an earthquake it sounded like an explosion, a repetitive series of explosions. Then I heard yelling, I couldn't make out what they were yelling but I picked up one thing “burn…down…find…my princess”, the voice was deep, like it came out from the depth of the abyss itself, it was angry too and rumbling. I didn't know how to feel about that voice, should I be scared from it or relieved that help came. And as I was contemplating, the wall which I was listening through begun to shake, vigorously. I got scared and moved to the farthest opposite wall, the shaking was getting rapider and harsher until it collapsed. The wall -which was infused with magic-  got destroyed and it's destroyer walked in, their black iron armor shone with the magic particles that were zapping around them, their gauntlets battered from beating the wall, I can still vaguely remember the droplets of blood dripping from them.

“princess.” they said “let's return you home”

Tear bubbles begun to form in my eyes as I took their hand and happily said “Yes! Thank you!”

Later, as protocol goes, I had to punish the knight. Technically they failed in their job to keep me away from danger. And normally, I could pardon them which I was planning to, and my mother was ready to offer them a handsome award however…

“Knight! You have laid my life in danger by not protecting me, almost risking the stability of the honorable Rooney Kingdom, yet since you have helped save me, the princess, you shall choose your punishment”

As I opened my eyes to look at them, I blink. Are they … blushing? 

“Knight is there something the matter?” My mother spoke

They cleared their throat and shook their head “No your majesty, I would like the princess to choose my punishment”

My mother looked at me, and smirked for some reason.

“Go on, daughter, give them their punishment”

I stopped to ponder for a second, I need to choose my words carefully “Alright, with the royal power granted to me by her Majesty the queen, I punish you by not leaving this castle nor my side as long as you are alive”

The knight squirmed a bit and responded with a blushing “As you wish my lady”

Which made me get worried. Can't say the same for my mother since she was giggling behind her fan looking the other direction.

Now, each time I look their direction their gaze goes another way, even under that helmet I can feel they are trying to avoid me. Which makes me a little angry, as I finished brushing my hair I called them over.

“What's the meaning of this?”

They squirm and say “Meaning of what?”

“You're avoiding me.”

“My apologies my princess. If you think a necessary punishment is necessary then as you wish”

“Punishment?” I ask puzzled

In a single breath they said with a dead-serious tone “What would you like me to do? Would you step on me as I whimper beneath you? Or would you like to whip my lowley body until you feel satisfied? Or would you-” 

“Halt!” I cry, blushing furiously “are you alright in the head?!”

The knight completely matter-of-factly reply “It's appropriate to punish who do bad”

“A-atleast act like you don't like it, foo!”

[orybzf]

As a princess, I know my duties.

Each day I woke up at 6 am, I take a bath, I brush my teeth, then my servants choose my wear for the day. At 9 am I am ready to start my day. Meetings, royal appearances, responding to letters, entertaining foreign guests. Once a visiting princess of another nation whined about the protocols and how suffocating it feels something to be a princess. I nodded and agreed with her just to be nice but I honestly don't see it. I like my job wholeheartedly. I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

As I am brushing my hair, something I like to do frequently these days, I look towards the grand golden-hinged doorframe, a knight stationed stoically there wearing a complete black iron armor, and a sword hanging in their waist. I think they are avoiding my gaze? I can't tell what they are thinking nor what expression they are making under that helmet. Sometimes it annoy me, other time, it comforts me. However my knight is a weird one.

A week ago, in a beautiful day like this one, I was kidnapped by a group of revoltists as I was having a walk in the royal forest, my knight indeed was there, however I wanted a moment of peace alone and I asked them to stand by. Hesitant at first they refused. But a secret technique I learned from my mother when my father -The late king- got worried about her is to pout and, in her words, “act like a hungry cat”. 

And it worked, with the knight agreeing to be near me close enough to act quickly if something happens but far enough so I can have my peace. 

But alas, I got myself kidnapped with the men taking me to their hidden bunker in what I later found out was in the hidden magic forest between our country and the western one. 

I was what they needed, a political bargaining chip to threaten the queen to step down.

Several cold and empty days followed, they didn't feed me nor they spare me from the beatings. At a point I thought of ending my life with scraps of glass that were lying around. It was a rational decision since my life would not be guaranteed if my mother actually backs down so why not go to the next life with dignity. 

As I picked up the largest and sharpest glass shard that I found a mild earthquake made me drop it, the earthquake didn't last too long only a few seconds, minutes later another earthquake happened and as the last one it only lasted a few seconds, and another one happened, and another then another followed by another. 

I realized after the fourth one that it was not an earthquake it sounded like an explosion, a repetitive series of explosions. Then I heard yelling, I couldn't make out what they were yelling but I picked up one thing “burn…down…find…my princess”, the voice was deep, like it came out from the depth of the abyss itself, it was angry too and rumbling. I didn't know how to feel about that voice, should I be scared from it or relieved that help came. And as I was contemplating, the wall which I was listening through begun to shake, vigorously. I got scared and moved to the farthest opposite wall, the shaking was getting rapider and harsher until it collapsed. The wall -which was infused with magic-  got destroyed and it's destroyer walked in, their black iron armor shone with the magic particles that were zapping around them, their gauntlets battered from beating the wall, I can still vaguely remember the droplets of blood dripping from them.

“princess.” they said “let's return you home”

Tear bubbles begun to form in my eyes as I took their hand and happily said “Yes! Thank you!”

Later, as protocol goes, I had to punish the knight. Technically they failed in their job to keep me away from danger. And normally, I could pardon them which I was planning to, and my mother was ready to offer them a handsome award however…

“Knight! You have laid my life in danger by not protecting me, almost risking the stability of the honorable Rooney Kingdom, yet since you have helped save me, the princess, you shall choose your punishment”

As I opened my eyes to look at them, I blink. Are they … blushing? 

“Knight is there something the matter?” My mother spoke

They cleared their throat and shook their head “No your majesty, I would like the princess to choose my punishment”

My mother looked at me, and smirked for some reason.

“Go on, daughter, give them their punishment”

I stopped to ponder for a second, I need to choose my words carefully “Alright, with the royal power granted to me by her Majesty the queen, I punish you by not leaving this castle nor my side as long as you are alive”

The knight squirmed a bit and responded with a blushing “As you wish my lady”

Which made me get worried. Can't say the same for my mother since she was giggling behind her fan looking the other direction.

Now, each time I look their direction their gaze goes another way, even under that helmet I can feel they are trying to avoid me. Which makes me a little angry, as I finished brushing my hair I called them over.

“What's the meaning of this?”

They squirm and say “Meaning of what?”

“You're avoiding me.”

“My apologies my princess. If you think a necessary punishment is necessary then as you wish”

“Punishment?” I ask puzzled

In a single breath they said with a dead-serious tone “What would you like me to do? Would you step on me as I whimper beneath you? Or would you like to whip my lowley body until you feel satisfied? Or would you-” 

“Halt!” I cry, blushing furiously “are you alright in the head?!”

The knight completely matter-of-factly reply “It's appropriate to punish who do bad”

“A-atleast act like you don't like it, fool!”

[orybzf]

I had a vision

[orybzf]

autistic folks when their routine gets disrupted, and they don't get alone time when they're supposed to get alone time

[orybzf]

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

[orybzf]

how the world feels when you listen to a song for the first time and immediately know you'll love it forever

[orybzf]

love when my internet gets bad and im just scrolling the dash looking at the diagonal gradients

[orybzf]

Something I noticed while reading The Eminence in Shadow's light novel

[orybzf]

Your knowledge retention doesn't suck because mobile phones have fried your brain, your knowledge retention sucks because you're wiki-diving at 3:30 AM on a Tuesday and haven't slept in 36 hours.

[orybzf]

you know what they say

[orybzf]

broooo did you seriously disturb my eternal rest & bring me back to this mortal coil just because my ancient enemy the eternal night has returned? after i sealed it away and everything? which one of you tampered with my binding runes 🙄

[orybzf]

hate when youtubers change the title and thumbnail on an existing video to drive new engagement. this is not my beautiful house this is not my beautiful wife.

[orybzf]

I think that banning porn has made this website more sexual over time, actually. When people had that porn outlet you could mostly just post in peace but now can’t mention any random thing without people relating it back to their horniness. It’s gotten worse, I tell you. I was here before the porn ban. Occasionally accidentally coming across a sex gif was the price we paid for mostly keeping on topic.

[orybzf]

these are KILLING me

[orybzf]

Vivipary in Tomatoes