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Welcome

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Fighting God in his own home

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if you think about it it's only fair that Character With No Canon Physical Description is declared sexiest man by popular vote. on the Critically Acclaimed Movie That Doesn't Fucking Exist website

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I can’t begin to tell you how often I think about you and your writing. The stories you tell and the way you write are beautiful and have affected me in a way I don’t even know how to describe. There’s a quality to them that brings me so much comfort and happiness—that has been bringing me comfort and happiness since 2015—and I don’t think i’m ever gonna be able to thank you enough for that. I hope you get better and wish you all the health and happiness in the world. I would actually wait endlessly for you to update again, but your health comes first, and even if that update never comes you should know that I am forever grateful for the years of joy your writing has given me

I-

I am beyond speechless. I don't even know how to respond. I don't feel like I deserve such sweet and kind sentiments, but I am so thankful for them. It blows my mind that despite how long I've been away, I still get lovely readers like yourself reaching out like this. And I'm so unbelievably guilty that I've left you all hanging for so long.

I'll be honest. I don't know if, at this point, I will ever update Pursuit of Happiness or my other stories. I've decided to use my time and limited energy for other things. I've recently started my own small business, something I can do to help support my family from the comfort of home, and that eats up a lot of my own personal resources, but I haven't given up writing completely.

I have three separate novels in the works. One of which is actually heavily inspired by Pursuit of Happiness. I very much love the idea that two people with so many differences might still find some common ground and fall in love. I never would have been able to develop my writing to the point that I felt comfortable writing a novel without encouragement like this.

So thank you so much. I don't even know what to say other than I appreciate you and your words so much more than I can ever express. I want you to know that I will think of them often, especially when the imposter syndrome gets a little overwhelming.

Thank you again.

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Art by @ionomycin

Twitter/Patreon

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sans tells a joke

As you see it, the best you could hope for, going forward in life, is for your wedding, should you ever have one, not to suck quite as much as your cousin’s. That, and, hopefully you’d remember to wear slightly less uncomfortable shoes to the next one, be it yours or someone else’s. Also,

“Ung. Thirsty,” you whine.

“then go get you somethin’ to drink,” says Sans, slumped over in his chair, bowtie disheveled and sweat dotting his collar.

“But it’s so far,” you whine again, but knowing how annoying you sound, even to yourself, just makes you feel like whining more. It’s the heat. “Come keep me entertained while I wait in line?” you plead.

At this, he opens a single eyelid.

“dealer’s choice?” he asks, sounding markedly less lethargic than only seconds ago.

“Yeah, just come with me. It’ll help me keep my mind off of my feet and all the electrolytes I’m losing.”

“alright,” he says, too agreeably, swinging his legs down off the chair he’d been resting his feet in.

You plod across the grass together to stand behind other people waiting on refreshments, and he begins:

“a skeleton walks into a barber shop.”

“Oh, god,” you say, “why do I get the feeling you’ve actually done this?”

He clears his throat.

“Sorry. Continue.”

“so a skeleton walks into a barber shop. goes up to one of the chairs, sits down, spins toward the mirror. says, ‘ok, fix me up.’ now the barber, he’s- he’s totally in the fuckin’ weeds with this guy, but he’s not about to shoo away a payin’ customer, right? so he says, ‘ok, how do you want it?’ hopin’ the guy’ll give him a hint, somethin’ to work with. skeleton says, ‘just go nuts, gimme the works,’ y’know? so the barber goes and gets a hot towel, leans the skeleton waaay back, and puts it on his face. he goes, ‘aaaaahhh, that’s real nice, thanks.’”

“the barber starts mixing up the uh, you know, the shaving soap? in a bowl? and moves the towel to the top of his head so he can start spreading the soap around on his face. skeleton goes, ‘yeah, nice. nice’ as he’s doin’ it. Then the barber brings out his razor. the skeleton goes, ‘hey man, what the hell are you doin’ with that thing? i clearly ain’t got a beard to shave.’ y’know, like- ‘come on.’ barber apologizes and takes the towel off his head and starts latherin’ up the top of his head. once he finishes that, though, he starts lookin’ kinda nervous ‘cuz he clearly doesn’t have a clue what’s supposed to come next.”

“Sans?” you interrupt, “How long is this joke, exactly?”

“long enough,” he says. “dealer’s choice, remember?”

He clears his throat once more, pointedly.

“anyway, he goes in his drawer and gets his scissors, kinda shyly turns around with them. guy just shakes his head. barber turns around and gets his electric clippers. guy shakes his head again. barber says, ‘uh, okay then,’ and takes him to the sink to wash off all the soap. they wash off the soap, wipe his face an’ all that. the barber offers him some nice moisturizer and aftershave, and he gets that, looks in the mirror, smiles like he likes what he sees, and thanks the barber. says ‘how much do i owe ya?’”

“the barber thinks about it for a minute. the whole thing didn’t really take all that long, and didn’t really use any of his skills, so he’s really just tryin’ to figure out how much his time and a little product is worth to him. He says, ‘five dollars.’ the skeleton hands him a twenty, tells him to keep the tip, and leaves. the barber just writes it off as a fluke and goes on about his business.”

“until the next week. the skeleton comes in again, same day of the week, same time. says, “ok, fix me up.” and the barber does the exact same stuff as the last time: hot towel on the face and head, soap on the face and head, no shave, no haircut, wash it off, moisturizer and aftershave. says, ‘still five bucks?’ barber says sure. skeleton hands him another twenty and leaves.”

“he comes again, the next week an’ the week after that, an’ the week after that, an’ so on an’ so forth. they become buddies. the barber starts lookin’ forward to it, cuz frankly it’s the easiest money he makes all week. he starts tellin’ his friends about ‘im, this crazy son of a bitch who comes in every week just wantin’ a hot towel, some soap and some aftershave and pays him quadruple in tips for it. he thinks it’s a hoot. anyway, one day, san- uh, the skeleton, he doesn’t come in. the barber’s checkin’ his watch, but nothin’. all the way to the end of the day. he’s not too broken up about it, he’s got plenty of regulars, but still, he’s curious.”

“anyway, the next week, the skeleton comes in on his regular day and time, and hops into the chair, spins around, and says, ‘ok, fix me up’. the barber’s hands are shakin’ as he puts the hot towel on his face, he’s never seen anything like this before. the skeleton’s got this beautiful, luxurious ginger hair, all the way down to the floor, and a beard to match it. like i mean, shampoo commercial, zoom in close to see the ‘proteins’ working, flippin’ it all around, kinda beautiful hair. and he grew it in the span of two weeks or maybe less.”

“well, he kinda shakes himself out of it, figures the guy’s playing some kinda prank on him, so he tugs on some of it, see if it’s glued on or something. the skeleton says, ‘ouch, hey man, what’s the idea?’ the barber takes a step back, totally in awe. it’s real hair, alright. he says, ‘how? how’d you- this isn’t possible.’ he says, ‘i started takin’ some new vitamins.’”

As he says this, you’ve reached the refreshment table. He grabs himself a plastic cup and ladles himself a drink, and one for you. He presses it into your hand with a wide grin.

“Okay?” you say, clearly not getting the joke.

“oh, you’re waitin’ for the end of the joke, huh? well, kid, we’re in it.”

You pinch the bridge of your nose.

“or didja forget? this was the punch line.”

His satisfied grin remains in place all the way back to your table. It’s suspicious.

“Okay,” you finally say, “what is it?”

He leans forward, elbows on the table and fingers steepled together.

“you’re probably wonderin’ what the skeleton in the barber shop had to do with anything.”

“i was not, but you clearly want to tell me, anyway, so.”

“well, i’ll let you in on a little trade secret: sometimes,” he says, leaning in conspiratorially, “the trick to timing a good joke is to throw in a pretty long red hairing.”

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I'm so sorry you got covid! Literally I'm with the others- take as much time as to heal and see where you want to take your story. You have such a loyal fan in me. Your world building and story progression are everything. ☺️❤️ Please take care of yourself!!

Don't be sorry, but thank you so much for the sentiment! I just really hope you and yours are able to stay safe and avoid it.

And I appreciate you so much for your sweet words. Really. I can't tell you what they mean to me. Thank you again.

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Sweetie you focus on getting better for yourself. We will always be here if/when you get around to writing things up. Wishing you all the best in getting your tolerance back up, health issues are horrible especially when you lose hard-won ground.

Thank you so, so much for understanding and being so supportive. It really helps keep me motivated. And I love the way you worded that, "lose hard-won ground." Because that's exactly how it's been. So thank you again. ♥︎

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Hi! I've read several times your "Pursuit of Happiness" fanfic and i have to say i fall in love with it more and more each time i do! It's just so amazing and i love the idea so much!! It's also executed so nicely and just ajspakpdkakaks-

I've also noticed that you mentioned some health issues, so i hope that's going well for you! Can't wait for the next chapter, but please do take your time in getting it out!

Oh my goodness. Thank you so much. You're so sweet and I'm so happy that you like it! Also I'm really sorry for the late response. I never get on here anymore.

I addressed it in more detail in another answer, but I do have some health issues that have made it rough. I will do my absolute best to work on the next few chapters for you and everyone else that's been waiting these last few months.

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so i’m guessing you aren’t continuing your fic?

Hi! This is actually going to be a kind of long response because this has been on my mind a lot lately.

Short answer: I'd really like to, but I can't make any promises. I'm really sorry to you and anyone else that was super invested.

Longer answer: I actually just started re-reading it the other day and am almost back up to speed. I also have several chapters that need heavily edited/rewritten due to how much the story has changed from when they were first written, but the bulk of the content is definitely there.

The reason I often take long hiatuses is because of the several chronic illnesses I have. Sometimes they really take up all of my time and energy. Usually I'm able to bounce back eventually and carry on from where I left off.

Unfortunately ever since I got Covid awhile back, I haven't really been able to bounce back. It's like it hit reset on a lot of the health problems I had been able to mostly manage after years of treatment and trial and error. I'm not at my worst, thankfully, but I've definitely been set back quite a bit and just completing my normal, everyday tasks has become a struggle again. All of this has been really hard on me emotionally and creatively.

I'd really like to get back to writing. It's my one true passion and how supportive the community has been has really meant a lot to me. More than I can express with words. The last thing I want to do is let anyone down.

But right now I just can't promise that it's something I'll be able to do. I'll absolutely try my best! I just don't want anyone to get their hopes up in case I'm not able to.

Thank you so much for your interest in my silly, self-indulgent fic. I'm so happy that I got to share it with others.

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@willowdoor Oh my gosh! This is so incredibly sweet! Thank you so much! I cannot believe that anything I've written falls under this, but it means the world to me that you think so!

*reads a gorgeous line in a fanfic* oh my god. how is this possible. how did they even fucking think of this. the symbolism is spot on. the planets are fucking aligned, everything is one and all and the world is complete, my soul is at peace

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HAPPY NEW YEAR FOLKS!!!

Target Acquired!!!

ko-fi|patreon|etsy

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Ko-fi|patreon

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Geeeeet suited up! Some Twitter sketches. :D

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cool

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is there some bad habit reader has that drives papyrus crazy? (not folding her clothes, leaving dishes unwashed stuff like that)

ko-fi|patreon