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DAN AND PHIL SENTENCE STARTERS: PART THREE

below are a collection of sentence starters taken from various dan and phil videos throughout the years. feel free to change wording/pronouns as needed!

“I’m gonna put you in the fridge.”

“Is it cute to be asked to be pushed on a swing?”

“It is gay and sad. That is how I like it.”

“I hope you get haunted once.”

“Something unhinged has been manifested into our reality.”

“No no no, we’re not even gonna finish that metaphor.”

“Maybe I’ve had enough of the stressful modern world. Maybe I just want to become an olive.”

“See? Now I want to go home.”

“Why is this exactly like Saw?”

“That cat is fucked up! Sorry, all animals are beautiful, all cats are beautiful. Not that one, that’s a fucked up cat.”

“We appear to be in hell.”

“We’re not beating the allegations-”

“I’ve made some bold choices over the years and I regret nothing. Currently.”

“No one working at a golf course would find the reject from Hot Topic cute.”

“I thought it was cool in the moment!”

“I guess God hates you.”

“Just say ‘hi’ you weirdo.”

“Dost thou have a fucking problem?”

“It’s time to destroy my career before I start it.”

“I don’t know what that means, don’t answer that question.”

“When he dies, we’re gonna put it on the Wikipedia.”

“Yeah, that’s what permanently altered your brain chemistry.”

“Math failed me again.”

“As if there’s anything wrong with me walking around every day like the creased laundry pile leftover from a gay funeral.”

“I call this look ‘Depressed Parisian Twink’.”

“If you look more fashion-y, it appears more fashion-y.”

“Pretend that you look good.”

“Well, what can I say? Objectively, I hate it.”

“You kind of look like three children wearing a trench coat.”

“I’m in the gayest swamp gang in the forest.”

“I’m like a deranged, homosexual, horribly lost Harry Styles right now.”

“You look like a gay game show host from my nightmares.”

“It’s physically uncomfortable to look at you wearing that.”

“Nice to know that, after all these years, he’s still fucking weird.”

“I’m here in spirit and sarcastic comments.”

“Get your knees out for the lads.”

“I’m having playground flashbacks.”

“I’ve got a melee weapon and horn. I’m the most dangerous motherfucker on this moon.”

“It’s the Lovecraftian Bezos.”

“God wanted me dead.”

“Who needs brain cells?”

“Someone restrain this boy.”

“If that’s a sign of the future, I don’t want to go there.”

“You know what we say about superstitions!”

“Are you lying for attention?”

“These homosexuals are feral.”

“Alright, let’s ruin these people!”

“That was one of the worst auditory experiences of my entire life.”

“I don’t care if Mozart did this when he was five, he’s a nerd.”

“You are the least zen person I’ve ever known.”

“I was actually trying really hard to not immediately do or say that.”

“Am I speaking facts? Or falses?”

“I need you all to understand, ___ does not know what they’re doing, it’s just happening.”

“You look so hauntingly NPC.”

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DAN AND PHIL SENTENCE STARTERS: PART TWO

below are a collection of sentence starters taken from various dan and phil videos throughout the years. feel free to change wording/pronouns as needed!

“Oh my god, I have no plan! I have no ambitions in life! What the hell am I doing?!”

“Oh my god, get these terrible children away from me.”

“I am not going to tell any of you what that means.”

“I just thought about the dramatic delivery, I didn’t think about the reality.”

“You have no taste.”

“Don’t talk about your trauma when I’m trying to look beautiful.”

“I’m drinking lead and serving dread.”

“I’m actually worried about what’s about to happen if you lose.”

“I live for the applause, and I did not get it.”

“Are you saying my head is ugly?”

“God, please, let me feel something.”

“__ is having a midlife crisis at the moment.”

“You’re having your twink death crisis.”

“I think __ does stupid shit all the time, and I just observe it.”

“I don’t know where I am, at any point in time.”

“We are betraying the laws of cooking.”

“The neighbors are going to call the police again.”

“We’re so good at the task known as remember.”

“Why is every single piece of lore that we learn about your childhood an outrageous lie?”

“Well, __, we’re about to do some trauma processing today.”

“Do you have any idea how unhinged that is?”

“What if the alien just wants a friend?”

“No one even think about me.”

“You’re good at something?”

“You could make a little story in your head.”

“I wanna get crushed by this boulder.”

“We will not let you down like everybody else—which is mainly me.”

“Would you rather I was not authentic?”

“How many hours did that take you?”

“It’s your sleep paralysis demon.”

“Oh, no, false memory.”

“You robot freak.”

“Exactly what happens behind the bowling machine is what happens in your mind.”

“Oh, 100% if I were in a horror movie, I would try to do the right thing, and I would die so horribly.”

“I would like to hit you in real life.”

“Oh shit this is violent.”

“Don’t joke, you have no depth perception. You have no object permanence.”

“Yes, king, flop harder.”

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DAN AND PHIL SENTENCE STARTERS: PART ONE

below are a collection of sentence starters taken from various dan and phil videos throughout the years. feel free to change wording/pronouns as needed!

“I yeeted that fucker into a landfill.”

“Do you care nothing for a well thought out concept?”

“Well, what can I say?”

“That was iteration, it was just a shit one.”

“You’re banned from friendship.”

“I don’t like to contribute, I just like to judge”

“You’re only as good as the other children are terrible.”

“I don’t know why I’m rooting for you in this situation.”

“The puns stop right there.”

“You could kill someone with anything.”

“The sugary event horizon, that’s how I want to go.”

“Our ineptitude is terrifying.”

“I’m about to pick up a sauce pan and whack this guy in the noggin.”

“Is that a gram? Is that a gram? I don’t do drugs, I don’t know what a gram is.”

“I’m hot, I don’t know how to count.”

“I still feel like I’m gonna murder you for several reasons that have just been pent up.”

“Some might say it was condescending and passive aggressive. I say it was entirely necessary considering the circumstance.”

“God’s testing you, and you’re testing him right now.”

“If this wasn’t really dramatic and terrifying, it would’ve looked really funny and silly.”

“I’ll text you if I die.”

“I’ve decided not to take any personal trauma from this.”

“We are not going to afford the furniture we want with that.”

“That sounds like a midnight problem.”

“He just chucked that bitch into the ether.”

“Why am I missing all the puns today?”

“If you touch me, I will break your possessions.”

“Be carefuller than me!”

“Polar bears hate him.”

“This guy is failing the challenge.”

“I’m depressed, and I need edgy jokes to cope with my anxiety.”

“I think this is the point where we’re gonna die.”

“I really appreciate you trying to keep this spooky whilst I try to keep it together.”

“Like, I’m actually trying so hard to keep this together.”

“You genuinely didn’t think about how that was going to sound, did you?”

“Human faces are quite complicated.”

“Knives are out, no messing about.”

“That’s the last time we’re touching knives today.”

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PUPPET HISTORY SEASON THREE STARTERS

“I’m really rooting for ya.”

“We got some pretty freaky family reunions, man.”

“You can’t bring a stick to a monster fight.”

“You’re telling me to go fuck myself.”

“Some pointed at the creature’s particular affinity for young blood to suggest it might even be a werewolf, which is dumb as hell.”

“I’ve learned nothing.”

“And I’m gonna say it again!”

“Fuck your tea!”

“Wow! This guy sucks so bad!”

“I hope he falls into a volcano, frankly.”

“Stay in your fucking lane.”

“This will not be blasphemous at all!”

“Okay, I actually thought that was an interaction that was happening in confidence that would stay between the two of us.”

“I will fully murder you.”

“Upstage me one more time, you little piece of shit, and it will be the last thing you ever do.”

“You watch yourself, that sounds like libel.”

“I can get litigious you piece of shit.”

“We don’t need to dig any further on that lore.”

“I hate every second of everything that’s happening right now.”

“Would you guys poison your whole family?”

“What do y’all think about boats? Yo ho ho, or no no no?”

“I actually blacked out, I actually didn’t hear the question at all because it was so stupidly worded.”

“I resent that.”

“I bet they look just like the Power Rangers.”

“Either way, he is in hell now.”

“So what’s your deal here?”

“I will pay you to quit.”

“That doesn’t sound awful, it sounds like not a bad way to go.”

“I think that it wasn’t said, and you better watch your back.”

“I think that’s the first official death we’ve had on this stage.”

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PUPPET HISTORY SEASON 2 STARTERS

“Let’s do this, let’s get back into this nightmare.”

“That is a wildly specific reference.”

“You’re a rotten man, or thing, or whatever you are.”

“I hope that’s the last thing he ever said on earth, because that’s a very funny last quote.”

“It’s cute! It’s adorable! It’s kinda dumb!”

“So just a big wave of death, basically.”

“I think bears are the scariest animal in the world.”

“I’m good. I just finished my little snack and I’m ready to go.”

“So what I did was I captured one of the spiders, and I did burn it alive under a Slurpee cup.”

“I feel like kids are the scariest creatures on the planet.”

“Kids are just plain creepy.”

“See what happens when you teach the children?”

“You know how easy it is to kill a baby?”

“Know more. Try knowing more.”

“It’s not whimsical, it’s devastating.”

“Pole vaulting would be really funny, because there’s a possibility the pole would snap and I’d break my neck.”

“Can you think of a more baller way to go out?”

“You’ve never had a summer where your parents were like, really sick of you, and they were like ‘why don’t we just throw forty-five dollars at the problem’?”

“It’s the early nineteen hundreds, I bet there’s stray dogs everywhere.”

“We got a secret weapon, the only secret about it is we don’t know what it does.”

“Just kinda seems like a bunch of guys just made a lot of bad memories.”

“I’m gonna set you on fire.”

“Some classic Europe shit.”

“Can we say it? Isaac Newton is probably a murderer?”

“This guy’s kinda a wimp, no?”

“It’s not even a bit anymore, people are talking.”

“There’s been so many historical people that have done amazing things, and I seriously get anxious about going to the supermarket.”

“I just get really unsettled when all my little things aren’t in their little homes.”

“So usually, I won’t sleep for a week.”

“I don’t do math, I’m cute, I don’t know.”

“Thanks anyway, a-hole.”

“I’m not that giving and loving.”

“I guess that is a nice little present for the other hoes.”

“It’s generous to call it a joke.”

“I’m disgusted, I’m flabbergasted.”

“I’ve gotten a lot more into weed since the last time we hung out.”

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PUPPET HISTORY SEASON 1 SENTENCE STARTERS

"I wear this every day. This is my look.”

“Where’d this thing come from and how’d it turn out to be such a go-getter?”

“I was once in my classroom, actually, in high school, and a rat fell from the ceiling and hit a girl’s desk.”

“Did you feel like you were transported to another time?”

“A funny name for the source of my greatest dread.”

“I’ll die for a jellybean, baby.”

“Some renowned blowhard in Paris said it was caused by a strange alignment of the planets.”

“This is like a very depressing ‘Shark Tank’.”

“Well, you’d get real beheaded.”

“He never looks happy, he either looks indifferent, or very disappointed and angry.”

“I don’t like it ‘cause I wasn’t right.”

“It started out as a grift, how did it end up like this?”

“That’s not a euphemism.”

“I’d love to die on a lazy river.”

“If he doesn’t end his life face-down in a lazy river in Boca Raton, then he didn’t live a life worth living.”

“Just imagine me floating.”

“Just what in the hell kind of answer is that? Is this a game to you?”

“Bitch went overboard.”

“He was trying to make sports references.”

“This ain’t my first boat-sinking!”

“Are any of the stories that you’re going to tell, is one of them at least not going to be a bummer?”

“Okay, no that was too crass, that’s disgusting.”

“A monk threatened to murder him.”

“Funny you mention it, because I saw something weird today, too: I saw a dead man walking.”

“How’d you like to be dead?”

“I guess that’s gusto.”

“Could this have a toll on the general population’s mental health?”

“R.I.P., but in French.”

“Kinda similar to those people who danced ‘til they died in France.”

“Another miserable day in what is basically Hell.”

“I don’t say anything funny about your eyes!”

“Have you ever been trapped in, like, a prison of your own laughter?”

“Just a heads up, God doesn’t really look the way you’d expect him to, so just know that.”

“You really gotta stop complimenting yourself at the end of these through the veil of a puppet.”

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snow angel starters

pulled from reneé rapp's new album, snow angel. adjust pronouns and wording as needed.

TALK TOO MUCH

"it didn't feel like a dream."

"i'm taking everything i see as a sign and i know it's crazy, but what if it's right?"

"i wonder if we should just sit here in silence 'cause i think i talk too much."

I HATE BOSTON

"you got to be a big hometown hero."

"as far as i'm concerned they should just burn the whole city down."

"god forbid you're not the center of attention."

"the whole thing is haunted."

POISON POISON

"you could poison poison."

"you got a little bit ahead of me but unlucky for you, i am that bitch."

"and yes, i am a feminist but you're making it so hard for me to always be supporting all women."

GEMINI MOON

"i exist on a pendulum, swinging high or swinging low."

"you're so fucking perfect, how come i'm not feeling more?"

SNOW ANGEL

"what's misery without company?"

"i loved back then what i hate today."

"i wish i went a different way but if i went back i would do the same."

SO WHAT NOW

"if i'm missing calls i'm gonna cry."

"i found out from a friend of a friend that you're here again."

"so what now? should we talk?"

THE WEDDING SONG

"there's an old song i wrote for you."

"you are my one, you set my world on fire."

"the words were so perfect the world should've heard it."

PRETTY GIRLS

"you think that i'd be flattered, it's pathetic 'cause you're right."

"keep on pretending pretty girl."

"this conversation's classic i can predict this shit line by line."

"yeah, your boyfriend's cute. oh, shit, yeah, he can come too. you'll be his in the morning anyway."

"yeah, that bitch is gay."

TUMMY HURTS

"maybe i should try religion 'cause jesus you're hard to rely on."

"i just want some recognition for having good tits and a big heart"

I WISH

"so what's that mean for you and i? i thought we'd always be together."

"i wish i could still see the world through those eyes."

"i have been mourning since ten years old."

WILLOW

"looks like you're still getting used to being fully grown."

"don't have to use your own tears just to grow your own roots. just keep your passion for flowers and it'll patch up your youth."

23

"i thought this shit would look good on me but i just feel weird."

"i'm on fight or flight and i still can't fly."

"so, how old do you have to be to live so young and careless?"

"and every ex hits my phone like, 'happy birthday, are you alone?'"

"i hope that i can care less but i'm afraid to care less."

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THEME 11: “STARDUST” BY OUTXSOURCED

static preview  pastebin

theme features three custom links (with potential to add more), one 80x80 image, color options (background, posts, link, and link hover), an extra description, font options, and 500px posts. base code can be found here!

rules:

-like/reblog if using

-edit as much as you like, but do not claim as your own

-do not remove the credit

if you have any questions/notice anything off, feel free to message me and i will do my best to help you!

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THEME PAGE 03: KILLJOYS

static preview pastebin

A page for verses/muses/whatever. Features colored headers, a 100x100 image, a quote for each section, links for each section, a title header, and a three link navigation.

rules:

-like/reblog if using

-edit as much as you like, but do not claim as your own

-do not remove the credit

if you have any questions/notice anything off, feel free to message me and i will do my best to help you!

[outxsourced]

renee rapp, everything to everyone starters

below are dialogue prompts pulled from lyrics from the ep, everything to everyone. feel free to adjust wording/pronouns as needed

"i can't be everything to everyone"

"god, i hope that it's over when i'm older"

"i'm not scared of dying"

"it's you that I'm missing"

"we can't have another er trip"

"could've at least shown me some decency"

"falling in love, no, it ain't for the weak, so don't try this at home"

"and these pillows been talking asking me where the hell you've been"

"ain't it funny how time shows you, you know nothing"

"i used to love you, but now you're dead to me"

"i think my life might be better if I lived in colorado"

"maybe there i'd like myself, work on my mental health"

"who am i kidding, i'm addicted to the chip on my shoulder"

"i like it best breaking a sweat, so why go somewhere that is colder"

"i think i'd probably hate my life if i lived in colorado"

"will you come home"

"who are you with"

"pick up the phone"

"when i was young, my problems were her problems now, i don't wanna cause trouble at all"

"we're worried about you"

"don't worry about me, just worry about you"

"don't tell my mom, i'm falling apart"

"at least in her mind, hеr daughter is fine"

"she's dealt with this for years i got it this time"

"i lie and say i slept for eight hours all seven nights of the week"

"i worry about you"

"don't tell my mom"

"what you don't know won't hurt you"

"i'll lie just for you"

"your boyfriend's in the bathroom"

"i wonder if he notices the things that i can"

"you don't even get it, no, you don't understand"

"i want you, but i know i'm only one of your friends"

"i know all about you, all your favorite things i listen to your stories, all your wildest dreams"

"you know you're too good for him"

"i'd rather keep on lying than to tell you the truth"

"i'm sorry, but i'm picturing you kissing my neck

"i swear that you feel it, but then i second guess"

"today, i woke up in a good mood for once"

"first time in six months, i don't hate you as much"

"it's easier holding a grudge"

"i'd rather be angry than crushed"

"i'm back where i started again"

"i get so sick of myself"

"i heard you're happy somewhere else but i don't forget too well"

"i hate hearing your name"

"you're my biggest mistake"

"you split my world in two now i'm half the one you knew"

"wonder if you miss me too when we're looking at the same moon"

"i hope you're healing slowly and that your nights, they hurt like mine, 'cause I'm not sleeping"

"i'm just talking with your ghost and dancing with your demons"

"in the stars, i can see your eyes"

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a quick guide to make polls work for your theme

if you have polls on an older theme, it could make the post look a little off. i plan on updating my themes fully to add in poll formatting, however currently i'm still figuring it out so in the meantime, here's a few pointers to help it look okay

to format poll posts in your theme, you're going to want to make some div classes. i found these in the view page source feature on my blog that does have polls.

.poll-post

will modify the entire post content. personally i used this to resize the content to keep it from overflowing.

.poll-question

will modify only the question part. i used this to change font color.

now, poll answers are what i'm still uncertain about. judging by the source code it should be something like

.poll-row

however, i tried to mess with that and it doesn't seem to work. i'd encourage you to test it for yourself in case i missed something, and if you know how to make it work, please let me know!

as always, feel free to ask me questions and i will answer them as best as i can!

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THEMES 09 + 10: “RUNNING UP THAT HILL” AND “A DEAL WITH GOD” BY OUTXSOURCED

running up that hill (top): static preview  pastebin

a deal with god (bottom): static preview  pastebin

i needed you all to know how much i love them. theme features three custom links (with potential to add more), one 300px wide image that is as tall as the screen, color options (background, posts, link, and link hover), font options, and 500px posts. base code can be found here!

rules:

-like/reblog if using

-edit as much as you like, but do not claim as your own

-do not remove the credit

if you have any questions/notice anything off, feel free to message me and i will do my best to help you!

[outxsourced]

THEME 08:SWEET LITTLE SISTER

pastebin  static preview

theme features two sidebar images, additional  description, three custom links, 400px posts, two accent colors, post color option, color options (background, border, link, link hover, and sidebar) , three fonts (baskerville, verdana, ubuntu)

rules:

-like/reblog if using

-edit as much as you like, but do not claim as your own

-do not remove the credit

if you have any questions/notice anything off, feel free to message me and i will do my best to help you!

[outxsourced]

when it’s been so long since u made a theme that you realize you need javascript permissions for static previews

[outxsourced]

using javascript on tumblr pages – how to ask support for permission

✧ What is happening?

As of early May 2022, you might have gotten this message when trying to save edits on your custom pages or when trying to install new ones:

“Looks like you’re trying to add some Javascript or invalid html to your page. You’ll need to contact Support if you’d like to use Javascript.”

✧ Why is this happening?

Tumblr is preventing potential malicious uses of javascript and decided to ban any form of javascript on your pages, and for now the only way to re-enable it is to “contact Support”.

More info: https://help.tumblr.com/hc/en-us/articles/5869629271319

✧ How to contact support:

Just “contact Support” is vague enough in itself, so here’s a quick guide on what to write in your request to them so you can get approved asap. Please note that it may take some time for them to process your request. This exact method isn’t guaranteed, but here’s what I did that got me approved within a week.

1. Go to https://www.tumblr.com/support

2. In the Category option, choose “Customizing your Tumblr”.

3. In the message box, list out all the blogs you want to use custom pages on. Then, give a brief description of what you use those blogs for. You only need to state the blog names, *not* each of the custom page urls, or the javascript file links. Here’s a template:

(Remember the please & thankyous! Staff are flooded with requests right now so be mindful).

4. Skip the Attachment part.

5. For the Relevant Blog option, pick your main blog (the very first blog you created on your account)

6. For the Account Email, enter the email you use to sign in to Tumblr

7. Complete the Captcha and wait for the tick ✓ to show

8. Click Next.

9. You’ll reach the “Does any of this help?” screen. No, it does not. Scroll to the bottom and click “No, send my thing”.

And done! You’ll receive a confirmation email from staff that they’ve received your request. They will not send you a reply if your blogs have been approved for javascript usage. You need to check your custom pages every few days to see if you can save any edits, or if you can install new ones.

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UPDATE 5/8: verse page has been altered so javascript is removed, slight tweaks have been made to appearance.

to add more dropdowns, copy and paste the following:

  <section class="accordion">

 <input type="checkbox" name="collapse" id="handle[VERSENUMBER]">  <h2 class="handle"> 

  <label for="handle [VERSENUMBER] ">PUTNAMEHERE</label>  </h2>

  <div class="content"> 

  <p>Description here</p>  </div> </section> 

  <div class="quote">"quote goes here"</div>

THEME PAGE 02: MEAN GIRLS

static preview pastebin

A page for verses/muses/whatever. This was set up to partner with the fearless theme, but could be used by itself. Features colored headers, drop down descriptions, a quote for each section, a title header, and a three link navigation at the bottom.

rules:

-like/reblog if using

-edit as much as you like, but do not claim as your own

-do not remove the credit

if you have any questions/notice anything off, feel free to message me and i will do my best to help you!

[outxsourced]

UPDATE 5/7: verse page has been altered so javascript is removed, slight tweaks have been made to appearance.

to add more dropdowns, copy and paste the following:

 <section class="accordion">

<input type="checkbox" name="collapse" id="handle[VERSENUMBER]">  <h2 class="handle">  

 <label for="handle [VERSENUMBER] ">PUTNAMEHERE</label>  </h2>

 <div class="content">  

 <p>Description here</p>  </div> </section>  

 <div class="quote">"quote goes here"</div>

THEME 03 + MUSE PAGE: “SUGAR CUBES AND ROCK SALT” BY OUTXSOURCED

theme: static preview  pastebin

muse page: static preview  pastebin

verse page: static preview   pastebin

theme features four custom links (with potential to add more or remove some), one 400x215 picture, color options (background, border, link, link hover, scrollbar, posts, and sidebar), font options, an additional description and 400px posts. base code can be found here!

muse page features a sidebar with four custom links (with potential to add more) and a 400x215 picture, two 90x90 pictures (per muse), three links per muse for bio/verses/etc (I have used less links but I haven’t tried it with more), muse name, and a brief description/quote per muse. there are slots for 4 muses with directions to add more. this page was intended for the original theme, and I wouldn’t recommend using it for a different theme.

muse page features a sidebar with four custom links (with potential to add more) and a 400x215 picture, a verse name, and a drop down menu for a verse description.  this page was intended for the original theme, and I wouldn’t recommend using it for a different theme.

rules:

-like/reblog if using

-edit as much as you like, but do not claim as your own

-do not remove the credit

if you have any questions/notice anything off, feel free to message me and i will do my best to help you!