owlapprentice

[owlapprentice]

I came up with another. No I haven’t watched the sequels.

3. Why does Rey take the last name Skywalker?

Rey is a scavenger. She watched the last person who uses one of the most powerful and well known last names in the Galaxy die. No one’s using it now so finders keepers.

More serious answer that makes less sense: Jakku and Tattoine are both desert planets with slavery (let’s be real here Rey was pretty much a slave. She sold a whole pile of scrap and only got paid a single meal) so there’s a chance that some slaves and slave culture moved between the planets. On Tattoine Skywalker was a last name but on Jakku it’s more of a title freed slaves give themselves to commemorate their freedom. They now walk the skies. At the end of the sequels Rey was finally able to let Jakku go and gave herself the Skywalker title.

Headcanons that answer various plot holes/ problems with Star Wars

1. Why does the Order only induct babies? Doesn’t that make them kidnappers?

The Force is very powerful and babies are very emotional. For a power that so tied to emotions this combination can be very dangerous. Babies/toddlers need to learn how to control and emotions before a tantrum causes an explosion. Older children who successfully get through this period without exploding things with their mind powers are seen to have a naturally high self discipline and emotional intelligence and thus don’t need to be trained.

Its seem as a great honor in many cultures across the Galaxy to have your child become a Jedi. To the point where as soon as parents suspect their kid is force sensitive many immediately and willingly give the baby to the Order. There is absolutely no kidnapping or coercion involved.

2. If red lightsabers are from “bleeding” a kyber crystal, why doesn’t Anakin’s lightsaber turn red in Revenge of the Sith?

While kyber crystals are naturally attuned to their Jedi’s emotions, it takes far more than just tapping into the Dark Side for the crystal to bleed. You have to do it on purpose. Not quite requires-a-whole-ritual levels of on purpose but like you have to consciously take your anger and pain and negativity and force them into your crystal. Anakin was a little too preoccupied with everything going on at that time to do that.

Those are the only two I can think of right now so feel free to send me more

[owlapprentice]

The other night husband and I were watching a documentary about the yeti where they were doing DNA analysis of samples of supposed yeti fur, and every one of them came back as bears.

Anyway, the next night we watched a thing about some pig man who is supposed to live in Vermont. People said it had claws and a pig nose but walked upright like a man. Now, I happen to know that sideshows used to shave bears and present them as pig men. So every piece of evidence they gave of this monster sounds to me like a bear with mange.

So now the running joke in our house is that everything is bears. Aliens? Bears. Loch Ness monster? Bear. Every cryptozoological mystery is just a very crafty bear.

Bears. They’re everywhere. Be wary. Anyone or anything could be a bear.

[owlapprentice]

Dos Orugitas from Encanto but it’s Gaia singing about Aloy and Beta

[owlapprentice]

Headcanons that answer various plot holes/ problems with Star Wars

1. Why does the Order only induct babies? Doesn’t that make them kidnappers?

The Force is very powerful and babies are very emotional. For a power that so tied to emotions this combination can be very dangerous. Babies/toddlers need to learn how to control and emotions before a tantrum causes an explosion. Older children who successfully get through this period without exploding things with their mind powers are seen to have a naturally high self discipline and emotional intelligence and thus don’t need to be trained.

Its seem as a great honor in many cultures across the Galaxy to have your child become a Jedi. To the point where as soon as parents suspect their kid is force sensitive many immediately and willingly give the baby to the Order. There is absolutely no kidnapping or coercion involved.

2. If red lightsabers are from “bleeding” a kyber crystal, why doesn’t Anakin’s lightsaber turn red in Revenge of the Sith?

While kyber crystals are naturally attuned to their Jedi’s emotions, it takes far more than just tapping into the Dark Side for the crystal to bleed. You have to do it on purpose. Not quite requires-a-whole-ritual levels of on purpose but like you have to consciously take your anger and pain and negativity and force them into your crystal. Anakin was a little too preoccupied with everything going on at that time to do that.

Those are the only two I can think of right now so feel free to send me more

[owlapprentice]

Every time I get more than 10 notes on one of my posts it’s like “I’ve gotten a good grade in Tumblr Posting, something that is both normal to want and possible to achieve”

[owlapprentice]

Lev, seeing a bald person: Have a nice day sir!

Abby: You know that was a woman right?

Lev:

[owlapprentice]

Have that pathetic crying session. It will save you

[owlapprentice]

Gideon is a unreliable narrator in that she has know idea what’s going on for like 85% of her book necromancy wise but knows that’s if she asks Harrow the only answer she’d get is “none of your business Griddle”

[owlapprentice]

I HATE THIS OLD MAN WITH HIS SAD EYES!!!

[owlapprentice]

Capitalism sucks cause I’m not allowed to think about my blorbos all day

[owlapprentice]

Reasons Ellie is immune Wrong Answers Only

She ate monistat as a baby

She’s perpetually way too dehydrated for the infection to take

She’s just a bad bitch like that

Cordyceps knows she’s gay and refuses to be cancelled for homophobia

She actually is infected that’s why she’s so aggressive all the time

[owlapprentice]

can't today. busy.

[owlapprentice]

I have decided that the best way to enjoy the show is to pretend that it’s not an adaptation of a game. It’s it’s own thing. That way none of the changes have the capability of bothering me. Like what do you mean none of the characters are supposed to look like that? You’re telling me that Tommy leaves Jackson? He’s got a kid why would he do that? There’s a cult in Seattle called the Seraphites? Jeez that sounds spooky I can’t wait to see them for the first time in my life.

[owlapprentice]

Dina really is hip deep in denial right now. She’s in the trenches. Forget about “they’re erasing her queerness” girl is going through every gay girls first foray into queerness which is wondering if the crush on her best friend is reciprocated.

[owlapprentice]

Pedro Pascal has the chance to do the funniest thing ever. Imagine it with me:

It’s Wednesday night, three days after Joel in One. You get a notification that Pedro Pascal posted something on his socials. You open instagram to see what it is. It’s a video of him on the floor covered in ketchup. He slowly gets up as music plays in the background. The caption? “He has risen baby girl”

[owlapprentice]

I have a question for the phone and tech nerds of tumblr if any feel so inclined to answer it:

I’ve been getting a notification for years now that I don’t have enough iCloud storage to back my phone up. And I ain’t paying another 99 cents a month for more storage. I’m a broke college student that can barely pay his phone bill as is.

So what exactly -if anything- is stopping me from deleting the iCloud data already in there and backing up into the newly emptied iCloud storage space?

Cause in my mind I’m not really losing anything, if something was there I last time I backed my phone up chances are it’s still on my phone. And if it’s not still here then well I probably wouldn’t miss it if I did accidentally delete it. I’m just scared of accidentally deleting stuff I don’t want accidentally deleted which is why I’ve been suffering that notification since 2017.

[owlapprentice]

get yourself a main character whos two primary emotions are "little cunt" and "catatonic with grief"