pancakesaresuperior - Tumblr blog

[pancakesaresuperior]

“I can’t keep defending you” I say to my racist homophobic parents who I have never defended

[pancakesaresuperior]

evermore isn’t even out yet and I’m already hoping for a Disney+ special

[pancakesaresuperior]

Taylor after releasing folklore out of the blue and single handedly saving 2020

[pancakesaresuperior]

Taylor Swift just does not rest

[pancakesaresuperior]

I-

I’m sorry

Yoshi is a what

[pancakesaresuperior]

I don’t know about anybody else but my five food groups are:

Chocolate

Crisps

Jellies

Ice-cream

Biscuits

[pancakesaresuperior]

Here are some funny stories about how my family always get injured in the most amusing ways possible:

I was ignoring my friend so she threw a basketball at me and broke my finger.

When my grandad spent the night at ours my brother had to bunk with me and my sister so he was on the fold up bed in our room. We had a pillow fight and my sister hit him on the head so hard he busted his head off the sharp corner of the bed frame.

When my sister was like 5 my dad threw her in the air and instead of catching her he dropped her on her face and chipped her front teeth.

My sister was messing with my dog by putting her hair in front of her face and my dog went to get her hair but caught her tooth in my sisters nose instead. She had to get paper stitches.

That happened twice.

When I was 4 I ran to my dad outside and busted my head off a brick pillar. I still have the scars from the stitches.

We used to have a dartboard. Used to. My mam went to collect her darts from it and my dad didn’t realise so he threw his dart and pinned my Mam’s hand to the board. To get hit out she had to twist and pull it.

I was canoeing and my finger got caught between the canoe and the sand and it broke again.

I had a friend over when I was about 11 and my you get brother took scissors off on of the top shelves. My mam went to take it off him and he sliced her palm open. We all freaked but my mam had to drop my friend home before she could go to the hospital. And my friend threw up in the car on the way.

My dad jumped on our trampoline and went straight through it, nearly breaking his back.

Feel free to add your own!

[pancakesaresuperior]

Why did no one tell me that there’s a scroll bar on Instagram?? When was that a thing?

[pancakesaresuperior]

[pancakesaresuperior]

sex education season 2, episode 4

[pancakesaresuperior]

[pancakesaresuperior]

sir, you cannot name your son “Papa_Roach_Scars.mp3”, we just won’t allow it

[pancakesaresuperior]

What’s happening on Twitter? 😂

[pancakesaresuperior]

Mmhmm attractive

Is it weird to have a favourite torture method? Mine is water boarding

[pancakesaresuperior]

She is

Magnificent

Does anyone want to see my new daughter? Her name is polly

[pancakesaresuperior]

Fish do it I dare you

Does anyone want to see my new daughter? Her name is polly

[pancakesaresuperior]

I don’t know or understand why but this is honestly one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen.

It’s just ?? Ice ?? In a college toilet ?? Why is this peak humour to me