pretzelmon

[pretzelmon]

I like this witch cat finding game, very cute. However I think it would be improved if it was instead about a detective with a severe substance addiction who is supposed to somehow solve a murder

[pretzelmon]

@shit-hdb-would-say

[pretzelmon]

[pretzelmon]

Spotting a mildly unhinged comment on Facebook:

[pretzelmon]

My favourite Fall Out Boy song

[pretzelmon]

[pretzelmon]

Me, singing a lullaby to my daughter: "There were three in the bed, and the little one said-"

Fred Durst, bursting into the room: "-KEEP ROLLIN, ROLLIN, ROLLIN, ROLLIN-"

Me: "What?"

[pretzelmon]

[pretzelmon]

John Brosio - Dinosaurs Eating a CEO (2013)

[pretzelmon]

it's kinda sad that slop is such a popular pejorative now. after all it has done to nourish the noble hog

[pretzelmon]

my phone isn’t charging even though i plugged her innnnn dramatic ass bitch. YOUR PUSSY IS FILLED! WHAT MORE COULD YOU WANT

[pretzelmon]

I think the sky is trying to say something? 🤔 👀 🏳️‍⚧️

[pretzelmon]

me: hey man welcome in what can i get you

guy who jerks himself blind every night to the characters from a flossing based gacha game where all the girls are bits of food stuck in the teeth of the demiurge and you can like feed the demiurge different meals to change the pool of waifus you’re pulling from and their names are all like “stringy chicken” and “wet cheese crumb” and shit: just a black coffee please

[pretzelmon]

fucked up tbh

[pretzelmon]

I don’t have tiktok so I had to find this like a mole digging for worms and nothing could have prepared me for the actual video itself

[pretzelmon]

[pretzelmon]