raanee - Tumblr blog

[raanee]

I don't know who needs to see this but FOR ONCE, JUST FOR ONCE, PLEASE JUST BE ALL ABOUT YOURSELF, YOU'LL MIGHT BE ABLE TO FIGURE OUT HALF OF THE THINGS YOU'RE CONFUSED ABOUT BUT JUST PLEASE, DO IT.

~Things I should've said to myself but never did.

[raanee]

Had it been a war, I might've been proud,

But the dagger was deep in my back,

And I thought it was an embrace of love.

I thought I'd be every shade of blue,

As gone were every trace of you

But I guess that's the tragedy, Grief becomes a luxury,

When one spends all their life mastering the art of nonchalance,

You barely feel agony, even when dealt with high infidelity.

~ the tragedy of grief becoming a luxury

[raanee]

Someday I wish to spill my rage in all it's glory, Without wanting to tone it down, without wanting it to be comely.

~an excerpt from my sonnet.

[raanee]

Spent wayy too much time trying to explain myself, Now I've learned to just let it go, Even though it might not be the best thing to do, I'd rather be unheard than be misunderstood.

~From sonnets I might release when I'll get famous :')

[raanee]

I like to think that Idgaf but when the arrow hits the bulls eye each and everytime, soo horrendously, soo viciously it's pretty hard to maintain that attitude.

[raanee]

:')

I am mastering the art to be silent even though there's a lot to be said.

[raanee]

'Cause all of my enemies, started out friends.

.

They aren't my enemies, more like strangers, strangers, who once I used to know wayy better, Way better than I knew myself, sometimes it even felt like a curse.

I was soo scared of losing them that I didn't realise how I lost the sight of my own self, I just wanted to hold onto them, 'cause how can I allow myself to lose everyone I've ever loved? Again and again.

~tbc 'cause there's soo much to write if only I had cartridge

[raanee]

I try soo hard to not think about you whenever I hear that song but it's the memories man! They continue to live even tho you are bygone.

[raanee]

Now when I think of you the only word I can think of is... Ummm... Yk?? "Betray"

~from "Conversations I'll never have"

[raanee]

"I've seen people flourish in love and I've seen them distort as well but the worst of em all is and will always be "stuck in love (or let's say stuck in the hope of it all)".

[raanee]

Y'all there's "Bella Cullen" kinda embarrassing and then there's "Hey, I think about you a bit too much so here's a sonnet I wrote for you" kinda embarrassing, unfortunately I'm the second one :') hellllpppppppppp

[raanee]

No matter where I go, I'll always come back to you

~My husband (who's not even real btw)

[raanee]

All I felt like, was saying "I want you to know", 'cause I've been explaining myself all my life, for once I thought I'd be understood.

~To be continued

[raanee]

Sometimes I want to disappear just to see if you actually care but then again, what if I'm right, What if you actually don't care?

~ I'm not that brave honey.

[raanee]

It's not about "who could ever leave me darling" but about "who could stay ?".

[raanee]

I don't care if I'm wanted or not but at the same time I wish I was wanted.

~I don't even make sense yet some of y'all will get it.

[raanee]

I'm no better than my 12 years old self, I still worry about the opinion of those who I should say "fuck you" to, I'm still afraid to disappoint my parents, I'm still hesitant to stand up for myself, I still think it's "disrespectful" to get back at someone who insults me, I'm still scared of ruining my reputation over silly things, I still think about the joy they gave me and feel like I owe them something, I still question myself like "am I gonna do it?".

WHY WHY WHY?!!!!!