random-fixes - Tumblr blog

[random-fixes]

interesting fact i have titanium in my spine

[random-fixes]

[random-fixes]

Exploding Head, Cynthia Marie Hoffman

[random-fixes]

monet violet | salman toor green | van gogh yellow

[random-fixes]

Japanese Uchishiki (altar cloth), 18th century

Resist-dyed warp (ikat), silk supplementary weft

[random-fixes]

How I’m feeling right now.

If only I could buy us all a new functional pain free spine.

[random-fixes]

But mostly, it was reading a lot of Jean Genet. A lot of Hickey is based on Jean Genet — Adam Nagaitis

[random-fixes]

The Night before the Exam by Leonid Pasternak, 1895

[random-fixes]

A child weaned on poison considers harm a comfort.

[random-fixes]

here's a moodboard of my favorite photos & paintings that have touched me and made me feel things: reflection by karina pavlova, can’t help myself by sun yuan and peng yu, lynda barry may 2016, the sorrows of young werther by robert gligorov, sea dance (cropped) by kristina tzekova

[random-fixes]

conversations with a crisis line

reblog don’t repost

[random-fixes]

It should be night for a month just so we can see who panics who lives and who dies

[random-fixes]

big fan of characters with abandonment + attachment issues so profound that they leave claw marks in everything they touch but would sooner gnaw off their own leg than admit they just want someone to stay for once. in a totally normal well adjusted and not at all projecting way of course.

[random-fixes]

on art

sheila heti pure colour \ ray bradbury zen in the art of writing \ sheila heti pure colour \ marie howe interviewed by victoria redel for bomb magazine \ ling ma severance 

support me

[random-fixes]

TRAUMA IS A LOYAL DOG

[random-fixes]

& when iain thomas wrote

"i promised a lot.

but never that i wouldn’t get back up after you knocked me down.

never that my broken remains wouldn’t catch fire. 

never that i wouldn’t burn through the ice and snow one more time.

and you can slam your glaciers into to me, so slowly, and even though they hurt, i will not go numb from the cold, i will not pass out from the pain, i will look up at you and the world and whisper through bloody teeth,

“more…”"

when e.e. cummings said “i’ll live my life if it kills me”

[random-fixes]

My current plan to recover from my mental and emotional existence is to just go so deep into being insane that I'll come out sane on the other side. Being a chronic people pleaser plagued with impostor syndrome stretched me too thin, and that leash simply snapped and I am now a completely untethered, unapologetic vermin.

Fuck having impostor syndrome, if I'm not entitled to be here they should've barred the doors better. If I'm doing everything wrong because of imaginary rules that nobody told me about, that's their problem, you should have made your confusing system more idiot-proof.

I'm not here to please everyone and do everything right. I'm here to make bad art, chew on furniture, make people laugh, cook awful food and look at pretty landscapes, and piss off the people who don't want me to exist. If I have an unseen infinite debt somewhere that I can never pay back, I'm going to keep running that tab until I die. I'm alive purely because the universe is shit at pest control.