raynerberg

[raynerberg]

took me kind of an embarrassingly long time to realize that the reason i share art online isn't really about me wanting to leave something behind for people to remember me by after i die — which is true, in part, actually — but because this is how i like to make connections with other people.

i'm not very good at talking to people, especially not one on one. i think i'm very awkward and navigating interpersonal relationships has always been difficult for me. it's part of the reason i seldom leave comments and replies under other people's posts (i try! but i don't always succeed) or reach out to others. communication has never been my strong suit and i never pretended that i have ever been good at it — which, of course, makes me all the more grateful, honored, that there are people in my life who have stuck with me and who ended up loving me unconditionally, despite everything — so i sort of gravitated towards the next best thing — art.

art is my way of communication. it is a way for me to express myself: my identity, my views, my interests, my struggles... and by putting myself out there in this way, i always hope to meet new people and form relationships with them through art. it sometimes works, sometimes doesn't — but i don't regret the time i spend with anyone, because, of course, not everything is meant to last forever, and i am thankful for every person who has decided to share some of their time with me.

it's hard for me to open up, especially so publicly, but there has been so much hate in the past few years that i feel nothing but a strong desire to at least try and spread some positivity. as such, i would like to thank everyone who has interacted with my art, followed me, talked to me, drawn for me or with me— every little interaction has immense value to me and i am grateful for all of it, even though i might not show it. as harsh as i am towards myself regarding my own art, i try to remember the real reason i'm here to share it. it has never been about the numbers or popularity for me, and never will be, but it has always been about the people who see it and feel connected to it, one way or another.

[raynerberg]

-2- 🚬

Heavy thoughts, quick messy sketches

[raynerberg]

-8- feel so blue 💙 🚬

Heavy thoughts, quick messy sketches

[raynerberg]

-9- 🚬

Heavy thoughts, quick messy sketches

[raynerberg]

-10- he looks perfect in my eyes 🥲🚬

Heavy thoughts, quick messy sketches

[raynerberg]

-11- cute ✨🚬

Heavy thoughts, quick messy sketches

[raynerberg]

Midnight black

~

Another redrawing of old stuff

[raynerberg]

While I'm in the pit and working on a new chapter.

My personal DX-playlist (part of it) Just because, why not. Karl Casey - Brave New World

Grendel - Zero Hour

Perturbator - I Am The Night

The Enigma TNG - Cybergoth

Perturbator - Technoir

Detroit Diesel - Lost Signal

FGFC820 - G.B.A.

Agonoize - Paranoid Destruction

Nightcrawler - Soul Burner

Midnight Danger - We Won't Come Back

Midnight Danger - Road To Madness

[:SITD:] - Orbiter

Eisenfunk - Jericho

Awakening (Donbor Remix) - M.A.D.E.S

Imperative Reaction - Overcast But once upon a time it was a thread: "list the songs/music that you associate with your favorite universe". Out of participation, without tags.

[raynerberg]

Cool black

~ This guy is cursed and I'm not fucking kidding. A redrawing fkng try of another old portrait.

[raynerberg]

Ну что, элитарные мои, глава вторая пишется. Много бытовухи (без неё раскрыть персонажей не получится, как ни старайся). Много Грейсона. И много взаимодействий между персонажами, особенно между братьями (то, чего мне так не хватает по сей день в DX, но, думаю, что и вам тоже).

Маленький фрагмент, как обычно, для затравочки. :) Как обычно, некоторая всратость и опечатки присутствуют, потому что ещё без правок.

[raynerberg]

Noir black ~ Redrawing an old portrait.

I started so many thematic series and didn't finish any... Typical me.

[raynerberg]

Тяжело стало сюда приходить. Как серпом по причинному месту... Жаль здесь нет заморозки как на блю, а только удаление.

Ладно, тем не менее, я ещё здесь.

[raynerberg]

you can see the end of the world from here.

[raynerberg]

dead flesh

[raynerberg]

i love men. i love trans men. being a man is cool. masculinity is not inherently predatory, femininity is not inherently safe, nor does it make anyone less of a man. anyway trans men especially are very welcome on my page. love y'all

[raynerberg]

Chapters: 3/3 Fandom: Dragon Age: The Veilguard (Video Game) Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Relationships: Lucanis Dellamorte/Rook, Lucanis Dellamorte/Rook/Spite, Lucanis Dellamorte & Neve Gallus, Neve Gallus & Rook Characters: Lucanis Dellamorte, Rook (Dragon Age), Neve Gallus, Zara Renata, Teleri De Riva - Rook, Illario Dellamorte Additional Tags: Slow Burn, spicy yearning, Spite is involved in the relationship, no beta we die like Wardens, Lucanis is demisexual, story takes places over course of a year, Eventual Smut, multichapter story masquerading as a series, what started as a series of vignettes has become an obsession, game typical violence, Mentions of Blood, so much blood Series: Part 8 of Crows bond for life Chapter 3 : Revelations     

Summary: Spite has woken and shares a bombshell of who he once was and what he wants now.

[raynerberg]

Little sneakie peak at what I'm working on