reidxtrminds

[reidxtrminds]

The fact that could be used for both Emily AND Spencer ☠️

Emily : I just want someone to take me out

Spencer : Like on a date or with a sniper ?

Emily : Surprise me.

[reidxtrminds]

Hotch: Se, let's get this straight-

JJ: More like, let me run this bi you.

Rossi: Let's see how this pans out.

Emily: Lesbi honest with each other.

Spencer: Let me ace-cess this situation.

Garcia: We need to queer the air.

Hotch: I'm gay.

Rossi: Thank you for your contribution.

[reidxtrminds]

Hotch: I think we should adopt another kid.

Haley: No.

Hotch: Why ?

Haley: Because by "kid" you mean "adult from your team" and we already have four of those.

Hotch, holding up Spencer: Five.

[reidxtrminds]

Hotch: Emily, why are you lying on the floor ?

Emily: I have depression

Hotch: Ah.

Emily: And I also have been stabbed three times.

Hotch: What-

[reidxtrminds]

Spencer: Hotch, can I call you Daddy ?

Hotch: I- what ?!

Spencer: Well, you're like a father figure to me.

Hotch: Oh, sweet Jesus. Thank God.

[reidxtrminds]

Hotch: I'm... I'm at a loss for words !

Spencer, narrating: Despite being at a loss for words, he proceeded to yell at me for the next twenty minutes.

[reidxtrminds]

Judge: We sentence you to 68 years in prison.

Derek, serving as Emily's lawyer: Your honor... My client would like to add one more year to her sentence.

Hotch, Rossi, JJ, Garcia and Spencer from the crowd: DEREK WHAT THE FUCK-

[reidxtrminds]

Emily: FUCK the government!

Htoch, sighing and pinching the bridge of his nose: Emily, we ARE the government.

[reidxtrminds]

JJ: I wish you could block people in real life.

Spencer: Restriction order.

Emily: Murder.

Hotch: Emily, what the fuck—

[reidxtrminds]

[ Emily, grinning to herself ]

Hotch: You're smiling. What happened ?

Emily: Can't I just be happy ?

JJ: Derek dislocated his shoulder knocking a door down.

[reidxtrminds]

Reid: I'm making a documentary about my life. Hotch, I think you should play the role of my father.

Hotch: I don't want to be your father.

Reid: Perfect, you already know your lines !

Garcia:... That was incredibly sad.

[reidxtrminds]

[ Loud, thudding noise ]

Hotch, sighing and pinching the bridge of his nose: What was that ?

Emily: A box fell down the stairs.

Hotch: That sounded a lot louder than just a box.

Derek: Pretty boy was in it.

[reidxtrminds]

Emily: I like girls.

Hotch: That's okay.

JJ: Me too.

Hotch: That okay too.

Penelope: So do I.

Hotch: Does anyone here like boys ?

Spencer and Derek: We do.

Hotch:... The entire team is gay.

Rossi: I could have told you that.

[reidxtrminds]

Hotch, texting Prentiss while in witness protection: I don't care where everyone ended up, but is everyone is alive and not in jail ?

Emily: Alive.

Hotch: Not in jail ?

Emily: [ Read 3:48 A.M.]

Hotch: PRENTISS !

[reidxtrminds]

Derek: Hey, do you think you've ever fallen in love ?

Spencer: Fallen in love ? I can barely even fall asleep. Step by step Morgan.

[reidxtrminds]

[Natasha speaking Russian]

Y/N, sighing: Yeah, I know.

Tony: You speak Russian?

Y/N: No. I just know the phrase, "This is all your fault"

Y/N: She says it a lot.

[reidxtrminds]

Clint, bursting into Natasha's room: I’m getting married today!

Natasha, on her bed with the covers up to her chin: Morning Clint.

Clint:��I’M GETTING MARRIED! TODAY!

Natasha: Yeah, you are.

Clint: WOO-HOO! [leaves room]

Maria, popping her head out from under the covers: Do you think he knew I was here?