#criminal minds incorrect

[spencestiel-michelle]

Reid: seriously, Y/n, i don’t want you to be the one going in there undercover. 

Y/n: i’m sorry. do you want to put on the dress instead and go in there yourself?

[lilliejareau]

emily: how do i become a farmer? like do i apply somewhere or do i just start digging?

derek: girl what??

[lemonadeinfuser]

you guys garcia has a dolphin pen

[bambinafangirls]

emily: okay so what's the plan? hotch: i just told you about it. emily: did i look like i was listening when you told me? hotch: yes, you did! emily: huh… i’m getting better at that. hotch: …

[ttlans]

[jemilies]

[vervainariadne]

Strauss: You need to hire a professional tech analyst for your team.

Hotch: *sees a scented homemade pink stationery resume written in glitter ink*

Hotch:

Hotch: That one. I want that one.

[thedelusionalbitchgianna]

*Spencer zoned out*

Derek: What are you thinking about?

Spencer: How long i'd survive if you suffocated me with a pillow.

Derek: What's wrong with you?

Spencer: Do you want a list?

[demonicbaby666]

Emily: [flips monopoly board over] Hotch: Prentiss! Emily: This is why your wife is dead Reid: Emily! Emily: This is why your girlfriend is dead Morgan: Emily: This is why you’re bald Morgan: I DIDNT SAY SHIT!

[criminal-mindsincorrect]

JJ : An apple a day keeps the doctor away

Emily : Slowly bites into an apple while menacingly looking at Reid

Reid :

Reid : Emily what the fuck

[milfsincrime]

part one: pre therapy appt

jj: emily, why do we have marriage counselling booked this weekend? we aren’t fighting??

emily: oh i forgot about that. it’s for me and derek

jj: derek is not your wife

emily: we thought it would be fun to see how long it’d take the therapist to work out that we’re not married, i’m a lesbian, and all the problems are fake

[spencestiel-michelle]

*the BAU team noticing Y/n and Spencer Reid*

Emily: hey- Derek. look at how close they’re standing. 

Garcia: they’re practically breathing the same oxygen. 

Derek scoffs: that kid’s got nerve. yesterday he literally took a whole step away from me when I stood too close to him- went on about something like germs in the air or whatever. 

Garcia: yeah, well, my love, you are not Y/n. 

[lilliejareau]

derek: yo reid, remember when JJ and will made out and prentiss just stood there and stared at them the whole damn time?

spencer, smirking: i remember.

emily: i was happy for them.

derek: girl, you looked at them like they hanged your cat or something

emily: yeah, no, we’re done here. *walks away*

rossi: see, derek? this is what happens when you remind people of their trauma. let her not-move-on in peace.

emily: i heard that!

[lemonadeinfuser]

how i feel whenever i say :3

[reidxtrminds]

Emily: ARE YOU-

Derek: Fucking.

Emily: KIDDING ME ?! YOU-

Derek: Fucking.

Emily: IDIOT !

JJ:... What was that ?

Derek: Hotch banned Emily from swearing so I'm helping her out.

[91-1lover]

Hotch: Yesterday, I heard Reid ask "Are you sure this a good idea? " and Emily said "Trust me"

Hotch: I have never move so quickly from one room to another