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I think as a society we need to shit more on this abomination.Seriously Katara changes her mind on a political/cultural issue just because she wants to make Aang's babies. AND SHE'S FUCKING 15.

So I honestly wasn’t sure if I was going to respond to this ask (just because I tend to stay away from fandom discourse), but when it comes to my girl Katara, I can’t help myself so I wrote this anyways. There are a ton of really amazing analyses of the comics and how the Kataang relationship plays out within them so this will be a sort of personal meta based on my own life experiences.

Again, I’m going to preface this by saying that I’m no expert, and this is based purely off my OWN experiences (and my own research and my own interactions). That being said, let’s get on with the meta.

One of the things that stood out to me from within the original ask is Katara’s age (14 in ATLA and 15 in the comics), and in preparation for writing this take, I spent a lot of time reflecting on the time when I was a 14/15 year old girl. During that time of my life, I went through one of the worst relationships of my life – I won’t go into much detail, but it was toxic and manipulative, and it was with a boy who was actually a bit younger than me.

On a fairly regular basis, I work with both preteens (10-12 year olds) and younger teens (13-15 year olds) as a mentor. Though a lot of them deal with relationship drama, I can honestly say that most of them are not ready to be in a relationship. The same can be said for both Katara and Aang (or just Aang, at the very least). 

If I’m being completely honest, I can see Katara potentially being in a relationship. She’s often portrayed as the most mature member of the Gaang (alongside Zuko toward the end of ATLA season three), and she’s had romantic encounters in the past (those inklings of a thing with both Haru and Jet). Despite all that, though, I’d honestly have loved to see Katara explore herself as a person outside of relationships in the comics (because she’s literally 14/15 and she’s been through war and she’s had her childhood snatched from her). Even still, I wouldn’t have been vehemently opposed to the idea of her being in a relationship because again, she’s 14/15, and that’s when girls “typically” have a greater interest in having one.

Aang, though… Aang is a different story entirely. The fact that boys tend to mature slower than girls is no secret, and there are several studies you can Google right now that discuss the nuance of it. From my own experience working with both girls and boys around Aang’s age (12-13), the boys tend to act at least a year or two younger than the girls of the same age, particularly when it comes to things like dealing with emotions or romantic interest. I’ve had a few discussions on this with my own mentor who’s taught within that age range for over twenty years now, and she’s confirmed my observations. This is not a hard rule, of course, but preteen/teenage boys tend to act roughly a year or two younger than their numerical age. Contextualizing this for Aang, that means that he acts ~10 years old, and this is definitely portrayed/shown throughout the course of ATLA (and the comics).

Not only does Katara have two physical years on Aang (no, we are not counting the 100 years that Aang was in the damn iceberg), she also has several years on him maturity-wise.

Obviously just because a couple has an age gap doesn’t mean that their relationship cannot work. There are tons of girls who date younger guys and have healthy relationships. This, though, usually occurs once both parties’ maturities have levelled so that they’re on equal footing.

This is not the case for Katara and Aang.

They’re both very, very young. They both don’t know who they are as people. Generally, getting into a relationship at such young ages is a very bad idea, particularly when it stems from teenhood into adulthood. There are always exceptions to this, but it’s very easy to lose yourself in another person, especially when your own identity as a person is still not fully formed yet.

That toxic relationship I referred to that I was in when I was 14/15? I ended up in a very similar role to Katara. I would constantly take care of the boy I was with and clean up his messes. If he owed people money, they would come to me and ask for it. If he offended someone, I’d have to apologize on his behalf. If he did something stupid, I’d correct it. When other girls would flirt with him, I’d tolerate it and let it happen because I didn’t know how to express how awful it made me feel. I’d placate him and reassure him and defer to him because that’s how our relationship was. 

This is dynamic of the Kataang relationship. 

The girl allows the boy to make decisions for her rather than coming to one together. 

The girl tolerates the boy flirting with other girls because she doesn’t know how to say how much she hates it.

The girl has to hold the boy together because he’ll lose it if she doesn’t.

The girl doesn’t believe that she deserves better treatment because she’s grown so used to the way the boy treats her and disregards her feelings.

It’s unfortunate, but throughout the comics and LOK, it’s apparent that Aang became Katara’s reason. Her purpose.

And I honestly think that that’s horrifying. I don’t care if she’s “just” a cartoon/comic character. Countless little girls look up to her and adore her and see themselves in her. It’s incredibly problematic to have this sort of toxic relationship play out to such a large audience and be seen as “adorable” and “cute” and “wholesome.”

It only perpetuates this idea that girls need a boy to be their reason. It leads to these little thoughts being planted in their minds. It leads to them justifying a boy’s mistreatment of them because “Aang did it to Katara, and their relationship is GOALS so maybe my relationship is too!”

I’m endlessly grateful that I escaped the relationship I was in. I didn’t make it out unscathed, and I will always carry the scars I received from it to this day. But I didn’t end up married to him, and I didn’t have kids with him, and I’ve been able to establish who I am as a person without him. I’ve been able to leave him and the insecurities/hurts of our relationship behind me, and as I keep moving forward, I heal more and more every day.

Katara doesn’t receive this reprieve. She’s in a toxic relationship from the time that she’s 14, and it affects her deeply until the end of her life. She doesn’t get to discover who she is without Aang. She caters to her partner and constantly has to corral him. She’s left constantly with her two non-airbending children. I have nothing against healing, but the whole warrior aspect of her character is reduced to essentially nothing. It’s horrifying.

I think it’s really, really sad that Katara becomes simply known as “the Avatar’s girlfriend/wife.” It’s not right. More people should be upset by this. More people should recognize the toxicity of the Kataang relationship. More people should realize that the very traits they occasionally condemn in real men are also in Aang.

Bryke did a disservice to both Katara AND Aang through their relationship. Katara’s character shouldn’t have had to revolve around someone else, and Aang’s character shouldn’t have been allowed to stagnate so sharply.

I desperately hope that girls don’t end up in situations like mine or Katara’s. I desperately hope that boys will understand that there needs to be an equality in a relationship. I desperately hope that, if you’re in this sort of unhealthy situation currently, this post can give you the hope and courage to at least begin thinking about what’s best for – not only your partner – but also for you, as a person.

All that being said, Kataang is NOT a good representation of a healthy relationship. At all. Period. Stop romantacizing it, for the love of all women (and others! [because women aren’t the only ones who end up being trapped in toxic relationships – but that’s a discussion for another time]) who are caught up in ones like it.

For those who may have missed it, I’ll say it again.

Kataang is NOT a good representation of a healthy relationship. 

Look at it for what it is, beyond all the nostalgia and misogyny.

Stop romanticizing it. 

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The day before Juneteenth I find out that there are people who think Black Americans are immigrants. My optic nerves are not strong enough for the eye roll that is in my soul...🙄The Europeans thinking this pisses me off more than most, because they seriously want to deny their own dirt, even though the evidence is in their museums and royal jewel vaults. Let me hear someone in Europe talking about how Americans are ignorant because they don't know European history or some nonsense.

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Reblog daily for health and prosperity

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My passion? Making Zuko act like a doting husband to Katara even before they get actually involved romantically

(fics not out yet, just drafting)

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Idgaf I nodded when Katara bloodbent that piece of shit captain in TSR because it really did feel like generations of ancestral rage channeled through her as she used a power that was created by the only other surviving Southern Water Tribe bender who had used that same power to escape colonial imprisonment and torture. And yeah, that’s not how the (white) writers wanted us to view blood bending if The Puppetmaster is anything to go by but they gave Aang energy bending and Zuko lightning bending so Katara should be able to blood bend a soldier of the Fire Nation without judgement.

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Zutara, romance novels, and the female gaze

Okay so I’ve been thinking about the female gaze a LOT so I checked out a subreddit about romance novels, despite never having read one. I came across this meme (which was initially a Tumblr post and then got posted to Instagram and then to Reddit and I’m now bringing back to Tumblr — Internet telephone, pls never change):

And…what is The Southern Raiders, if not a platonic grovel? Katara’s pain is central to the episode. It’s central to Zuko. Zuko asks Katara what he can do to make up for his betrayal; she demands the impossible. He reads between the lines, cockblocks her brother to get the necessary information, and then waits outside her door overnight (which he also did for Iroh, the one person we know for sure he loves). He basically makes himself a receptacle for her rage, and he holds space for her by coming with her on her revenge quest and carrying their bags and not saying a damn thing about what she should and should not do beyond like…asking her to rest. And obviously the grovel works! She forgives him and then they’re thick as thieves, bantering and fighting and saving each other’s lives, etc.

On a different note, I’ve been told that enemies to lovers is one of the biggest tropes in romance novels, similar to YA lit and fanfic. Here’s something else I found in the romance novel discourse:

And…yeah. In TSR, Katara really does show Zuko her worst self, because she doesn’t feel the need to perform for him. She doesn’t feel the need to perform moral perfection OR cold blooded vengeance. She bloodbends in front of him and he just goes with it. She doesn’t kill Yon Rha and he just goes with it. He doesn’t treat her any differently afterwards. Maybe they talk about it off screen, but I kind of like the idea that they don’t, because Katara doesn’t need to explain anything. And it’s so interesting, because some people in the ATLA fandom have a totally different read on TSR. They think Zuko was encouraging Katara to get revenge (by what, keeping his mouth shut?), and that Aang is the one who acts as her moral compass. I believe that either Bryan or Mike said in the DVD commentary that Aang is the angel on her shoulder the entire time. And this interpretation does make sense if you see it from the male gaze, where Katara as an object of affection is acting in an angry, irrational, threatening way. But if you see it from the female gaze, you recognize that actually it’s probably the most emotionally taxing experience Katara has to go through, and she doesn’t owe it to be nice or perfect to anybody. Katara’s formative trauma literally comes to a head, and she has to make a decision — no, a discovery — about who she is in relation to the tragedy that defines her life and even her identity (as a waterbender, as a parentified child who becomes the mom friend, as a genocide victim), and she’s accompanied by someone who trusts her judgement and validates her feelings.

I’m not saying TSR is explicitly romantically coded, but when it conforms so well to romance novel tropes…is it any wonder that so many people thought “yes this is her man?” And then he takes lightning in the heart for her and reaches for her when he’s literally dying, I will never be normal about that either

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what’s the thing that irritates you the most about zutara antis?

I’d say it’s acting like the ship came out of nowhere and that it has no basis in canon. Zutara is fanon but it is not a crack ship. Zuko and Katara started out as enemies but after Zuko redeemed himself and Katara forgave him, they became friends. Due to that friendship, many people think they could have a romantic relationship too. A crack ship is shipping two characters that were never in a situation in which their relationship could realistically develop into a romantic one. An example of this would be shipping Jet and Azula, who never even met during the series.

There’s nothing wrong with crackships, many are very fun to ship, but there’s a clear difference between a crackship and a ship that just isn’t canon. So it does irritate me when antis act like Zutara has no basis in canon, when it does. Disliking the ship is fine, I have no problem with that, but I do have a problem with antis acting like people are delusional for shipping Zutara. There have been some reasonable people who dislike Zutara but have said they understand why it is shipped, and said it just isn’t their cup of tea, which is a perfectly reasonable response.

Thanks for the ask!

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My trouble with Kataang is that the development of their romantic subplot is totally Aang-centric. Before you say: “Well duh, he’s the main character” consider that a good romance needs to involve both sides of the relationship and ideally delve into both of their respective feelings for one another. Katara’s perspective is almost entirely absent from the development of Kataang, save for a few vague musings and a blush here and there. What, romantically speaking, attracts her to Aang? When did she first realize her feelings for him? How does she balance those feelings with their chaotic situation?

I can only guess the answers to these questions because the show provides us with very little concrete evidence that could help us understand Kataang. On the opposite end, we can absolutely pinpoint Aang’s feelings for Katara and track how they shifted over the course of the show. His feelings for Katara are loud and narratively relevant, but the same can’t be said for Katara. Her side of the relationship is ignored until the very last moment.

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When is the Baby getting here? Bonus:

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messy redraw of this fanart

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Thoughts on Star War the acolyte:

I hate that it's canceled!

please I need season 2 of this show!

Badasss yet complex female characters, especially one as the main character!

Force witches!

Yes I would love to be a force witch!

A show that feeds into my jedi critical vibes and I love it.

Hot dark male main character that I need to know more about.

Cute little Droid named Pip.

The song power of two is amazing for the main character sisters, but also it is giving so many Anakin and Luke vibes! I love it!!

Just the force witches and their culture is so cool and I love it.

Lesbians!!!!!

The Anakin vibes with the main female sisters.

The fight scenes beautiful

The feeling of this show gave me so many historical fantasy Chinese Drama vibes and I love it.

Mae's outfit is everything.

Mother Aniseya is also a fashion icon, plus I just genuinely love her.

Honestly I'm loving Osha's dark arc plus I think Sol got what he deserved.

I'm angsting over the separation of the two sisters.

Over all love the show and it deserves a season 2! I'm so glad I'm finally liking something new from star wars after the mess that is the sequels.

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a feel like the new generation of fanfic readers NEED to understand that clicking on a fic (interaction) does nothing. ao3 has no algorithm. your private discord discussions of fic do not reach the authors. if you do not actively engage with writers they will stop posting. this isn’t social media this is community.

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To be honest, the most controversial character for me in Avatar is Mai. I'm not even referring to her relationship with Zuko, but basically her position on the show. And in the comics, it gets even worse. It's like she doesn't really have any character or arc, and she's just doing what the plot needs (Like betray Azula, because the princess must eventually lose all she loved ones for her downfall.) Therefore, most of her actions and words seem illogical to me. She loves Zuko at the same time, but it's not bad for her to hunt him as a traitor? She supports the war and the imperialism of the Fire Nation, calls Zuko a traitor to the motherland, but when Ozai is overthrown and Zuko replaces him on the throne with a completely different policy, she is just fine. I mean, when did she change her mind? One minute she supports the status quo and doesn't mind Zuko communicating with Ozai and advises him to accept things as they are, then in the comics she resents the fact that Zuko asks his father for advice. What's in her head anyway? The same goes for her relationship with her parents, who are cold, but at the same time she covers up for her father, who is plotting. It's as if the scriptwriters never tried to look at things from May's point of view and build some kind of logical chain for the development of her character, rather than just using her as a plot tool. I think I would like Mai a lot more if I understood her at least a little.

Yeah, Mai's biggest problem as a character is that she's mostly used as a plot device. She does what the plot needs her to do. All the writing in the comics is like this, but Mai is written like this in the show, too. I remember when I first watched the show, when Mai showed up at the Boiling Rock, I initially thought she would save Zuko before she started yelling at him. Her anger at him for pulling the standard hero "breakup to save her" is so inexplicable. Like I get that you feel rejected, but people's lives are at stake here, Mai. And then her betrayal of Azula a moment later is equally inexplicable. I get what they were trying to do, but it's just not built up enough. She comes across as a misogynistic caricature of a crazy emotional girlfriend because her actions are over the top and do not make sense. The other day I saw a post saying her arc is "subtle" and that's why people don't get it, and no. None of her actions are subtle. She screams and yells and throws things and reacts to everything with dramatic biting sarcasm. Her betrayal of Azula is a grand gesture that was clearly supposed to be the climax of her arc, it's just not built up enough and we have no idea what Mai herself feels about anything that isn't Zuko, and even then, we know very little of how she feels about him. How did their love develop from when we saw her blush at him as a child to when they were on that ship in book three? How DID Mai feel about having to be part of capturing him? How did Zuko feel? I've said this before, but there should have been some tension there, some conflicting feelings, especially once Zuko betrays himself to go back home and gets to be Mai's boyfriend. Since that isn't explored, it makes his relationship with Mai feel like a lie, and another facet of Zuko being someone he isn't, and Mai just another person who would never love the real Zuko instead of the idea of who he should be. Just because she doesn't want to see him die doesn't mean she really understands him, or his cause, as you mentioned. But as I have said many times before, what really hammers that home for me is that when she comes back, she assumes they are still dating, and tells Zuko to never break up with her again. Like, I get that it is supposed to be a joke, but that's the problem. Mai Strong Female Characters her way back into Zuko's life because the writers thought it would be funny and cool and sexy. Look how funny and cool and sexy she is! She's pointing fingers in Zuko's face! We wrote a Strong Female Character!

But there was no thought given to Mai's actual motivations. And worse, they had an abuse victim for whom this is supposed to be his triumphant moment of independence from his abusers be in a relationship with someone who was a part of the life he chose to leave behind and told him that breaking up with her wasn't his choice and acted like that was okay. Again, I know it's all a joke, but it's an ugly one.

I don't think she's controversial, though. We've seen this type of writing for female characters before, as my reference to the Strong Female Character implies. She's cool, she's badass! She loves the hero despite him not doing anything to prove his worth, but to make up for how awfully he treats her, she treats him awful right back! She has to do over-the-top things constantly because otherwise the narrative will forget about her completely. She's edgy in whatever way will appeal to the audience the writers are trying to appeal to - in this case weaboo hot topic preteens.

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Art by eldinazavr

Translation

Zuko: KATARA?!?!?

Katara: THIS IS NOT A SOUTHERN TRADITION, BUT...

WHY NOT? IT'S STILL AN ENGAGEMENT SYMBOL.

NOW WE BOTH HAVE PENDANTS, HA HA!

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can you tell us abt the next gen?? what r the pairings? And what r they like

Absolutely, here are the big 7

Name: Lien Beifong, Avatar Lien (18)

Bio: the only Avatar to have had a choice in the matter. She took up the mantle from her dad and proceeded to start a civil war to place the rightful heir, Prince (now Fire Lord) Ryuu back on the throne. She's impulsive, loud, and combatative as hell. Bagged both her firebending master (and former enemy) Zeth and a noblewoman with a sharp tongue and an attitude named Zhi. Is currently having spiritual difficulties and hasn't unlocked the Avatar state. Punched a volcano and crowned the current Fire Lord on the same day.

Parents: Aang and Toph

Name: Prince Fire Lord Ryuu (22)

Bio: Waterbender. Is leading a counter campaing against Azula, fighting and negotiating for every city on the map. Is kind, intelligent, anxious and the group's mother. He secretly uses bloodbending for healing when waterbending isn't enough, but refuses to use it for fighting. He's the first waterbending Fire Lord in history. In a romantic relationship with Omashu's princess (his romantic arc is not over, I have a surprise in store for him). He's also the Avatar's waterbending master.

Parents: Zuko and Katara

Name: Zeth (birth name is Satoru) (19)

Bio: Firebender/Chi blocker. Once Azula's chosen heir and henchman, Zeth has since defected to help Ryuu get the throne back. Carried a lot of guilt over the years for the fall of the Fire Nation and Avatar Aang's death, and has since tried to redeem himself by teaching the current Avatar firebending, and acting as Ryuu's spymaster. Ruthless, temperamental, and also combatative as hell. Has no idea how the hell he ended up dating Lien and Zhi, very confused about that part, but a devoted and fierce boyfriend nonetheless.

Parent: Ty Lee

Name: Daichi Beifong (20)

Bio: Metalbender. Daichi trained the Iron Unit (a volunteer earthbending group ) in the art of metalbending, and his sister earthbending. He's serious, reliable and protective of his family and friends. He used to be a goofball but the war sharpened him and he often wonders how he became the voice of reason of the group. Is blind from an accident when he was a child and uses earthbending to see AND detect lies during interrogations. Daichi and Nakuta were childhood friends, and started a very sweet and steady relationship during volume 3.

Parents: Aang and Toph

Name: Nakuta, Queen of the Western Seas (20)

Bio: Wields fans, a boomerang and swords. Nakuta built a navy for Ryuu out of patriots, defectors and pirates. She rules the Fire Nation seas with an iron fist and managed to wrangle the enemy's entire navy in the bay. Nobody leaves or enters the Fire Nation without her say so. She's incredibly friendly, gentle, fun (you should totally have a drink of her cactus wine) and the kind of person who will have your back, no questions asked. Her and Daichi were childhood friends turned couple when they were teenagers and four years later, they're still strong.

Parents: Suki and Sokka

Name: Princess Tsuki (13)

Bio: Waterbender, but very low combat skills. Tsuki has been strategizing the campaign since she was eight, she's a child genious. She's intelligent, well versed in warfare, and has a terrible temper (season 1 Zuko temper) . She's a dragon rider as well. One of her pre-time skip adventures involved saving baby dragons with her twin brother Taiyou, and now they're bonded. Ryuu forbids them from entering the battlefield, but they help behind the scenes anyways.

Parents: Zuko and Katara

Name: Prince Taiyou (13)

Bio: Firebender/Lightningbender. Should Ryuu fall in battle, Taiyou is next in line. He absolutely doesn't want to be. He loves his dragon Peaches and would someday like to travel the world, not take over Ryuu's duties because Ryuu named him his heir. He's sweet, funny, a little dragonologist in training. He went from being a late bloomer where everyone thought he was a non-bender, to mastering lightning on his own in four years. He helps power radio stations, occasionally enters the battlefield as transport or messanger.

Parents: Zuko and Katara

Everything I mentioned is current to canon as the story is still going.

You can read Avatar: Next Generation on Deviantart or Fanon

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hate when people think the only archetype possible for a male sidekick to a female protagonist is a soft boi and/or himbo. like the implication there is that the only reason a man would ever defer to a woman’s authority is if he was a bumbling idiot. love male supporting characters who are smart and strong and confident and can step up when necessary but still kind and humble enough to let someone else take the lead most of the time