sassysnowperson

[sassysnowperson]

New Mobile Report Gundam Wing -Operation 30th- (x)

[sassysnowperson]

I think Killie either narrowly avoids an egg, or gets a small egg. Call it a quail egg.

It turns out there are Ongoing Negotiations regarding where the crafting room should be, and out of deference to housemates I have not bullied it into existence without considering their feelings. An Accord shall be reached but diplomatic protocols must be honored.

However, I did take a minute to do something creative - in the midst of unpacking chaos I took the time to turn my jewelry from a tangled mass of utter uselessness into an Art! This way I will actually use it AND enjoy looking at it!

Hello! I am moving, and packing up my crafting supplies, and I am a little worried that when I get to the new place I won't prioritize crafting again. So! I would like, 30 days from now, to have my crafting space set up again, and to have done *something* creative, big or small.

That's a very good use of an egg! @sassysnowperson, how'd it go?

What is this blog? | Submit to get Killie another egg

[sassysnowperson]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/66992527

Y'ALL THIS IS THE COOLEST FANFIC I'VE EVER SEEN.

It is a complete narrative about SecUnits on a Planetary Survey trying to communicate and keep their clients safe while dealing with the restrictions of their govmod.

IT IS ALSO A FULLY INTERACTIVE GAME OF MINESWEEPER.

The story is told BY PLAYING MINESWEEPER.

This fic is criminally underrated go look at it!!!

[sassysnowperson]

Houston, we have a second season! 🚀🧑‍🚀🍔☀️

Gastronauts is BACK for season 2, premiering August 15th only on Dropout - with host Jordan Myrick, dozens of professional chefs, and some very not-professional judges to give them the most unhinged cooking challenges imaginable 🧑‍🍳

[sassysnowperson]

I wonder if I haven't picked up writing in awhile because I've wanted it to be A Thing. For me to have a plan, a story idea. Maybe I just need to write? Maybe I need to accept that I am not A Thing kinda writer. Maybe I just need to yell and see what story comes.

[sassysnowperson]

nicole byers' most recent why won't you date me episode where she has lou wilson on and she asks the customary question "would you date me" and lou says actually we went on one date in late february 2020. and nicole has just completely forgot. exquisite listening

[sassysnowperson]

Hello! I have written over one million words of fic on Ao3, and most of it in Star Wars. Come, I shall reveal to you the secret.

Confidently make shit up.

Okay yes I'm out here exposing myself. There goes the last of any writerly mistique I had. But honestly, here's the truth, it's confusing to everybody. People will assume you found a wookiepedia article they haven't. But there are some steps to make it feel like Star Wars, and I will share them with you now.

How to Name a Star Wars thing when you don't want to open wookiepedia

Paper is flimsi, coffee is caf. Just memorize these two, throw em in early, people will assume you know.

Don't name everything. The eye glides over most things. Even if there is a name for it, you're allowed to decide that name is stupid. Your character is allowed to just have a bed or a desk, or whatever.

Focus on the tech, and any item that matters to the scene, that your character is interacting with.

Think of the thing from our world, and then add one thing that makes it feel futuristic. Think visual - Andor was a TV show, the tech changes are ones that would look cool. A list of sci-fi options - make it more angular, make it float, make it a hologram, make it do something automatically, make it blue.

Add a prefix or suffix to the real world name based on these new traits.

If it doesn't feel sci-fi enough, find a synonym for the real world part of the name.

An example:

Okay I'm writing a scene that involves a (looks around room) paper shredder.

Oh! We know paper=flimsi

Flimsi shredder. That's enough honestly. But if it's important, if Cassian is trying to destroy important rebel information before and Imperial walks through the door, we may want to do more.

Okay, well, most of the documents are actually little holograms in the show. Hologram.

Holo-shredder?

Now we're cooking! Something still doesn't feel right. Shredder isn't giving the right vibes.

Holo-scrambler!

"Cassian quickly fed the data sticks into the holo-scrambler. He kept his breathing steady through will alone, the air wanted to leap out of his chest as he heard Imperial boots walk down the hallway. Getting closer? He couldn't tell."

See! The eye glides right past it. Go forth! Write fic without fear!

Andor makes me want to write a Star Wars fanfiction but it's so scary. What if I write "Glup Shitto was sitting on the balcony, drinking coffee and reading his favourite book", but someone comments "didn't you mean he was drinking glop-goppy and reading a holo-journal? 🤨" so I open wookiepedia to check it out and it turns out that they also never invented balconies in the star wars universe and Glup Shitto can't read because of the freak accident he suffered in the episode 10 of the 2024 show "Jar-Jar and Babu Frik". What then.

[sassysnowperson]

No wrong answers:

If I were to start a YouTube channel and didn't want to show my face, what's the best mask I could wear (virtual or real)?

[sassysnowperson]

Just started watching Trauma Dump with Lou Wilson and holy fuck

What I expected: Lou sits down with A Buddy and chats about mental health in a way that destigmatizes it.

What I got: Either an actual therapist or someone doing a fucking amazing job playing one earnestly talking about mental health with Lou's improvised persona, who is a humor-is-deflection, party bro who decided to be a Cool Mental Health influencer, uncomfortable wreck of a person. The therapist gently, with continually gotten consent, and with relentless persistence, tries to get this Persona to have an earnest conversation, and Persona Lou throws every deflection he can at him.

It's so good. It's so good.

I love it as a therapist, the absurdity heightens the work the therapist is doing and makes the performance of it all so clear. I love it as someone who has been a fan of Lou, the fast thinking acting and the incredible resonance with the character. I love it as someone that loves improv, what a hell of his own making Lou has trapped himself in, giving himself such an earnest and compassionate straight man. I love it as a commentary on influencers turning their life into content, I love it as a thought provoking examination on the state of privacy, I love it as a reminder that you don't have to be good at therapy to benefit from it, that's the therapists job.

I was not expecting this show to be such a bullseye for me, personally, but oh man it is. I want to show clips of it to therapists in training and make them write papers about it. I want to gnaw on Lou Wilson's brain. Gha!!

[sassysnowperson]

In response to "The Liz Show" / unmasking: Do you have any advice on learning to unmask? Because to me it kind of feels like trying to roleplay the version of me that someone I am talking to expects / wants from me has become somewhat instinctive, since for quite a while that was the only way I found to somewhat successfully survive social interactions at all. I am now aware that this miiiight not be a reliable long term strategy, but I am not quite sure how to... start stopping it? More often than not I am not great at accessing my own emotions, which makes identifying my unmet needs difficult and communicating those needs effectively pretty much impossible.

So, any tips and tricks you can share?

(PS: despite all the above, I am aware that you are A Therapist, but not MY Therapist, so no, I am not expecting you to suddenly have a solution to all my issues, sorry for dropping them on you :D )

Thank you for sharing that at the end of the Ask, and I’ll reiterate it here just to be safe. I’m a therapist but not YOUR therapist, dear reader, so please take all of this with a grain of salt and trust your own intuition about these tips.

One tip I like to share with my patients is where I’ll start: Things like ADHD and Austism are disabilities and as such are disabling. Of course, most people have been told to “power through it, grow up, don’t let it hold you back, don’t give me those excuses” so it often doesn’t feel like you have permission to feel the weight of the knowledge that you’re disabled. So start by being twice as kind to yourself as you feel you deserve. Rest twice as long. Celebrate your wins twice as much. Be twice as patient with yourself. Because we’re starting from a deficit, and that deficit is often maintained by shame and exhaustion, and so as a result if you’re doubling up on kindness you’re probably just barely breaking even.

Some other things I like to do are look for examples of things I do in others, including non-human others. If you see a dog run past a ball, then find it when they double back, they don’t go “oh, stupid, I’m such an idiot. I’m a joke. I don’t even deserve the ball, I walked right past it and missed my opportunity,” they pick that fucker up and party about it. If you notice something you could use help on after someone asks and you said “no,” don’t treat it as a failure or a missed opportunity, see it as a present opportunity to ask for help now. Neurodiverse people often need more time to recognize and understand feelings. If you let people know that’s a part of your experience, it helps make it easier to circle back on things and say “Hey, yesterday when you asked if you could help I couldn’t think of anything, but I have some things you could help with if the offer still stands.” Do this for anything it applies to - asking for clarity, asking for help with daily tasks, asking for patience, asking for more time to rest, etc.

Another thing that is helpful is to keep in mind that YOU are the sole arbiter of your experiences. If something bugs you, it just does. You don’t need to wait until you can explain it to someone else effectively enough for them to believe you for it to be real. The same goes for joy - you don’t need to be able to justify why you love things to love them as deeply as you do. If flicking your fingers helps you calm down, do it. Nobody can really explain why anything works for them, you don’t have to be any better than them.

The last tip that comes to mind as a broad, generally applicable tip to anyone, is get curious, but don’t ask “why?” Ask “What?” “How?” “When?” or “Where?” Why is an OFFENSIVE question in a literal sense - not that it is rude but that it forces the responder to be on the DEFENSIVE. You have to justify it, and we just covered how difficult that is in the best of circumstances. By asking other questions, it helps you to reflect on things without having to justify them, which gives you more of a chance to really think about them without the pressure of defending something. Don’t ask “why am I like this?” ask “what happened to bring up this feeling?” or “where do I feel this in my body?” or “how did I get this tired so quick?”

Some other things I can recommend more specifically for recognizing emotions are; pay attention to the physical sensation that accompanies the emotion, and eventually you can learn to recognize emotions by reading your body like a map. Also note basic impulses that accompany emotions - if you don’t know what you feel but you notice you wanna stare at your shoes and hide then it might be embarrassment or excitement. If you notice the impulse to put something between you and someone else you may be feeling a little uncomfortable with them. Noticing physical and behavioral reactions to feelings can help identify them more clearly. It can also help to detach somewhat from emotions - if you feel something really strongly and it’s confusing see if you might be feeling 2+ things at once (like angry because you touched wet bread and excited because your favorite movie is starting and tired because it’s been a tough week and and and…) Noticing emotions as parts of you and not the entirety of you can sometimes help people with this. There are lots of practices from ACT, IFS, and DBT that can help people develop these skills but some of my faves are the chessboard analogy from ACT, Parts Mapping from IFS, and the STOP skill from DBT. If you don’t know what these are, you should be able to look them up and find materials to help you practice them.

Ask for help often, masking often leads us to stretch ourselves thin and wear ourselves down to the bone trying to do more than we can. And help yourself as often as you can. If you can’t go to class in an outfit but CAN go in your jammies and with sunglasses on then do that, because you need it to be yourself.

And remember that you don’t HAVE to do anything, and that includes unmask. Masking has some benefits, and can be valuable if done appropriately. Just recognize that either way there is a cost involved. Masking at a work meeting may mean you’re dead tired tonight and can’t take engage in interests, but unmasking may make other people at the meeting think you’re strange. This is not a moral failure, it’s a cost-benefit analysis. Making eye contact with your bestie at lunch may mean you appear more conversational and she feels more heard, but may mean you retain less because you’re monitoring your facial expressions and reactions more consciously. Take care of yourself, trust your intuition, be gentle with yourself, and as always, be gayer, read more Terry Pratchett, and take more naps.

I can ALSO highly recommend the Unmasking Autism books by Dr. Price @drdemonprince for learning to unmask. He has made some great worksheets that have helped me and my patients a lot.

[sassysnowperson]

Just got to introduce an older lady to the concept of aromanticism after she was really wondering if she was missing something because people kept falling for romance scams. I gotta say, *Is there something wrong with me why am I not getting scammed?* is an amazing pipeline for self discovery

[sassysnowperson]

I'm curious

Allergic to peanuts? Chocolate? Other nuance factor? No button for you, feel free to tell me in the tags!

[sassysnowperson]

finn lovers we WON

[sassysnowperson]

So I'm standing next to a sink, pouring the last third of a vodka bottle down the gullet of the drain, staring off into space and pondering my life choices and -

- this is taking forEVER?! I always figured if I was an alcoholic hoping I've actually hit rock bottom* that process would take like ten seconds tops. I've been standing here for thirty seconds! It was only a third of a bottle! Wow these bottles have terrible drainage.

*the circumstances are less dire this particular evening, I'm moving, that was my cleaning vodka I forgot about, it has lived in a hundred degree plus garage for over two summers, it's not worth the stress of moving it**

**but still it took so long. That's the takeaway.***

***If I'm ever writing a scene with this there's way more contemplating time than I gave it credit for.

[sassysnowperson]

I'm curious

Allergic to peanuts? Chocolate? Other nuance factor? No button for you, feel free to tell me in the tags!

[sassysnowperson]