scientisting

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self care is putting yourself to bed on a regular schedule because it’s the base treatment for mood disorders

there’s no twist or anything it’s just really really good for u to sleep at consistent times

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“What’s white and slow?” “Idk... what?” “Your car because it’s still stock.” 💭 #LMFAO #ihatemyfriends #imworkinonit #damnfuckinright #stockaf #lowandslow #jkitsnotevenlowsmh #brz #86 #hachiroku #strawberryacai #withnostrawberries (at Mitsuwa Marketplace)

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a lot has happened since I've last posted on here. it’s 2018 and I still don’t have my shit together LMAO.

I got drunk on NYE and added you again on snap. honestly, I didn’t think you’d accept it but... you did. and nothing’s happened and I don’t know what I expect but I don’t expect anything, I don’t think.

I'm laying in bed sick from, hopefully the flu.

when I'm well again and better I need to go get checked.

it’s a bittersweet feeling that someone can mean so much to you, but you don’t mean a thing to them. how is that possible? emotions are so weird, and how people can think so little of other people’s feelings is even more weird.

I stripped the bolt on my damn oil plug so I need to get that removed and change my oil asap.

bridges that I thought were burned (kinda?) came back together and I'm not sure how I feel about that.

it’s also weird to feel alone even though I know I'm not alone. to feel like I have no friends when I do have friends. maybe just one or two genuine friends, though...

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how does the app still not work smh @staff fix it!

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A message in the window 🙃💖 💭 #zoom #in #fuckyoutoo #subaru #brz #alwaysshell #shellsponsormelmfao #wegotlost #kinda #ididntwannauseGPS #stockaf #stillneedanoilchange #whosedowntocruise #iwantboba (at Lakewood, California)

[scientisting]

Sometimes I look at my car & think damn.... you look like a toy lol #subaru #brz #86shit #stockaf #iwantnewrims #whossellingenkeis #yesterday #gassingupmyshit #thirstyaf (at Long Beach, California)

[scientisting]

My night consisted of: booty & boba 😛 💭 #youalreadyknow #thatsmangogreentea #subaru #brz #370z #240sx #nissan #tyforcruisingwithme #christinehascarfriendswahh #stockaf #gonnabe #forawhile

[scientisting]

Yesterday 🌜 📷 by @jared184 #halfsies #mybaby #brz #subaru #thanksforthepicturebih #stockaf #fornow #ineedanoilchangesoon #86

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& even though the stupid part of me is hoping you’ll call or text, I know that if you actually did, I wouldn’t be able to handle it......

[scientisting]

every day that passes by, it gets easier even though I still think about you...

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lack of posting cauuuuuse for some reason the Tumblr app won’t let me post on my phone :/ 

SMH

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brought you up today while i was hanging out with a friend came to the epiphany that i acted the fuck up a lot, if not js as much as you, and so maybe it’s better this way so that things didn’t get really messy still hurts tho. it wasn’t meant to be but it still hurts even tho your ass acted brand fucking new a lot, you had your sweet moments like when you would kiss my knee after taking off my pants. i never said it but it was one of my favorite things or how you’d grab my thigh in your sleep or make sure you were touching me even js a little bit

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before I call it a night, ima post my avatar lol.

can’t remember when exactly this was but I just got my colored contacts in the mail and wanted to play with them. 

I was high as fuck this night, too.

also this night I sent you a selfie on Snap really quick, threw my phone, and knocked the fuck out. you probably thought I didn’t answer on purpose.

looking back, I wish I would’ve answered.

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it’s been a little over two months and I still can’t seem to get over you.

I'm not sure where or why it went wrong, but it did. and it stings more cause I could feel it, too. 

prior to me you were in a four year relationship - maybe you wanted to fuck around, maybe you didn’t want to get hurt, maybe you js wanted to have fun, but I swear that shit felt genuine.

now I can’t even talk to other guys, can’t even fuck other guys cause you’re still on my mind.

I'll get there tho.

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whatever happens, I'm glad i got you.

staying stock for a good minute, but I can’t wait to see how I fix you up.

I need car friends.

[scientisting]

Dear diary Day 37191919 Life still sucks

[scientisting]

Charlie Hunnam photographed by Jack Guy.