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I can already see Ares retelling Odysseus full on hunt of reclaiming his palace in the medbay where Poseidon is being healed by Apollo and Poseidon is just seething with anger because the only thing he can think about is how similar Odysseus is acting to not only his son- the son that he blinded, Polyphemus (his name echoing and him using only long ranged attacks), but also similar to the one thing that ‘scares’ him, Scylla (and he only went for those who had torches!!) all the damn while Apollo is giggling his ass off-

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Poseidon hiding in the shower:R-ruthlessness is mercy…upon *voice breaking*

Hades banging on the door:STOP HIDING IN THE DAMN SHOWER POSEIDON!

Poseidon:I WENT THROUGH A TRAMATIC EXPERIENCE! LEAVE ME ALONE!

Hades:YOUVE BEEN IN THERE FOR TWO DAYS NOW BROTHER!

Poseidon:IM FINE!

Hades:WHY DO I BOTHER-

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SPOILERS FOR THE ITHACA SAGA! A SHORT SUMMARY OF THE ITHACA SAGA! Based on the Suitors POV (only the first two songs)

After Twenty very long years of waiting. The Queen herself, who trapped herself in her room under the claim that she was weaving a shroud, came out and announced one singular and one final challenge that seemed the person who would hold the crown and rule forever.

To string the Old Kings bow and shoot through 12 axes clean.

The Suitors struggle to sting the bow, even with two men doing it, even when one stretched it with his own leg. The bow wouldn’t string.

If they couldn’t even sting the bow, how would they shoot through 12 axes straight clean?!

Antinous noticed this and tells them how the Queen was still wasting their time and would most likely keep on doing till they grow old. He comes up with a plan on killing the Prince and ravage the Queen, willing or not. To finally, finally take over the throne of Ithaca.

Everyone is estatic! Thrilled that they’ll finally get what should’ve been there’s all along! And now they finally get to do so!

They raise their cups and cry out in victory! Even those who didn’t like him or simply held some sort of respect for him smiled slightly.

They was it! This was their retribution! They would FINALLY rule and beat those worthless royals and claim the kingdom as their own!

But….

While doing his speech….

Whist in the mist of the celebration…

Out of nowhere….

Antinous laid dead on the table with a blue arrow sticking through his neck that instantly killed him….

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Despite how fucking heartbreaking and full of comfort the Ithaca Saga is, It cracks me up every time I think about.

Because from the literal Viewer’s perspective, you gotta admit…

Not only did Odysseus, oh I don’t know-

Blinded a God’s son whist making a joke about his one singular eye, proceeded to escape said God from potential death and then when he did infact die from him he then got revived, used a jet pack to beat his ass and fucking torture the said god until he pleaded for fucking mercy-

But he, after all of that, uses the same tactic that Scylla uses, going after the torches, to defeat the suitors and kill them all off.

The same Scylla that not only killed his men that he allowed but the same one that Poseidon is scared of-

Siren Penelope confirms this! “He will chase you high and low, so find a place he’ll never go. The one way you’ll get home is sailing where he’s scared to go.”

I understand that it’s more of a metaphor and he’ll never go there because oh hey reasons of pride and shit but taking this to another perspective makes this funnier, for me atleast-

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More or so spoilers for Song:Odysseus in the Othaca Saga-

I like to imaging that when doing his hunt for the other suitors, he finds this one suitor hiding (or they find him) and start talking about how they no longer have to fight and shit and Odysseus, being the cunning manipulative king he is, pretends to actually thinks about it but the fucking moment the guy says “Let’s have open arms instead’ Odysseus suddenly runs up to him and jabs a arrow through the guys head or throat, shrugs nonchantly whist tilting his head, staring this man dead in the eyes and says “No.” Before continuing his rampage.

Like he was okay to play with the part, because hey it’s funny and shit and he wants to fuck these people up more, but then that dude starts saying that and he immediately goes like ‘yeah no your dead.’

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Some FUN things I noticed in Sinsmas! SPOILERS AHEAD!

This child doesn’t know what’s going on, but she’s happy!

He’s staring at the fire in so much awe!

Blitzø’s phone says ‘Ride me.’ Graffiti on the wall says ‘Spindleknots (pls correct me), an imp poster is on the wall and the helluva boss logo is on the far wall.

His face is amazing-

Weren’t these the dog treats that she originally hated? And her face of confusion is adorable!

Stolas looks horrified at forest but then looks in not disgust but in a more “what the actual fuck” look.

Millie smiles when Moxxie shoots her out the window. Most likely landing on her feet.

Now stols is officially traumatized!

Loona’s two friends, since they from Gluttony, are food related!!

The one on the left is a Icecream with a cherry ‘on top’ earrings (a sundae, perhaps) and the one on the right has a Burger sweater and is wearing Bee wings and antennas!!

TWO MORE DAYS TILL ITHACA SAGA RELEASES!! HOW WE FEELING?

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Now. To remind everyone here.

This is Uncensored Stolas..Without the Sleepy anti-depressants med from the Sloth Ring.

The same ones he hasn’t been able to take in over a month. The same timeframe he hasn’t been able to see his daughter.

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andrealphus has a nickname.

I can’t tell if this is an error or a little Easter egg but.

His nickname is Andy-

(Stolas being a angy birb is amazing-)

I get the nickname. Bc it’s just his first 3 letters of his name with a y but like.

That’s so…Human…and normal-

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I’m going to die, I’m actually going to fucking die-

MORE HORSES- HIS NAPKINS ARE HORSE THEMED-is that another horse from the circus in the back?

YOU CANT- STOP IT!

Look at this-

Fishsgdjskah-LOOK AT THIS-

YOU CANT JUST HIT ME WITH THIS SHIT AFTER THE SHITSHOW THAT WAS THE TRIAL!

ITS ONLY BEEN A WHOLE ASS MINUTE! IF IM GETTING THIS RANTED ABOUT IT THEN WHAT WILL THE OTHER WHOLE ASS 29 MINUTES BE?!

THE VIDEO HAS ONLY BEEN POSTED AN HOUR AGO! IM ONLY ON THE FIRST HALF ON THE 1 MINUTE MARK!

maybe it’s because it’s the final or that stoblit are actually communicating that I’m getting this hyped up for ranting but like…HOW CAN I NOT!

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I’m only at Second 28. 20.fucking.8.

He has stickers of horses!

Omg it’s the fucking horses from the circus. And Blitzo has more crossed out pic-

HE CROSSED OUT HIS YOUNG SELF TO THE HORSES-

You see his face of absolute joy and glee when Stolas awkwardly mentions about the horses-

I’m just starting- HOW ARE YOU GOING TO HIT ME WITH THIS SHIT! ESPECIALLY WITH THE ITHICA SAGA COMING SOON-

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IM ONLY 13 SECONDS IN!

Look at Stolas! LOOK AT BLITZØ!!

THE BABIES-

I WANT TO FUCKJNG CRY!!

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Unnecessary Censorship in EPIC!

Odysseus:We’re in the home of the Wind God~

Eurylochus:We don’t know for sure…

Odysseus:How many fucking islands have you seen before?

Eurylochus:A lot, actually. They’re very common-

Odysseus:I will feed you to the fucking sharks-

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https://www.tumblr.com/sera8273/757280664872747008/odysseus-is-still-on-the-raft-which-is-slowly?source=share

Hermes is pulling out the Pan for panic

Pfft- fuck yeah!

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Remember Emberlyn? That crazed over the top Helluva Short 3, Mission:WEEABOO-BOO (foreplay on wear a boo boo)?

Remember her writing this first sentence?

Yeah this is a short and very VERY quick summary of the Trial that Blitzø had. He snarled in defiance before Satan while Stolas gave everything he had away to be with him- well, protect him.

And talking about Satan…

His design is cool as fuck! And his voice actor, Patrick Page did an excellent job in voicing him!

It’s clear that he looks down on those below him (especially imps) and has a knack for showing off and lying (Bee’s eye roll and Ozzie’s face when he says that he’s been longer than Luci had was key evidence.)

His design is a fire breathing dragon, which fits because besides the whole angry bit, they’re natural born leaders, strong, overbearing (as he lies and abuses his power) ambitious, and, ironically enough, known for their sense of justice.

It’s nice how, in Lucifer’s absence, he took over the role of Hell’s new leader to an extent.

It’s clear (kinda) that he isn’t lying about the ‘creating Imps’ and all of that as the they all say “Oh thank Satan!” And uses Satan as a threat to other Imps. Like how Higher ups (Goetias, Sins? Royals) say “Oh Lucifer” and Lucifer says “oh God!” Because that’s their own creators. (Thanks for the correction Strangedreamings-)

And, despite having bad anger issues, you can tell that he’s actually trying to not burst out in fits of rage.

See the subtle changes in his expression when Yogirt mentions them? I like to think that in the past, his outburst got so worse that either the Sins or Satan himself (better yet, Lucifer) made the two candle head demons stick with Satan to help him in controlling his emotions better.

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CHARACTER FUCKING GROWTH ROGHT HERE!!!

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There are two types of demons here, okay?

This boi-

LOOK AT SATAN’S EXPRESSION OF SADNESS AND WORRY! AHHHH

And this gremlin-

Satan and Angel symbolism at its finest!!

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The thing that gets me about angry Hermes is that he’s not often like that so it comes as a shock to others. Another thing about Hermes is that while he’s not as strong as Poseidon and Zeus, he’s clever and has connections. As the messenger of the gods, what’s stopping him from pulling a few strings and getting Hera and Hestia involved or bargaining with someone like Nemesis the goddess of vengeance and retribution? Though the only reason why he hasn’t resorted to that yet is probably due to being worried about Odysseus, his great grandson is in no state to deal with the suitors in his home. Hermes will very much make the therapy saga happen and no one is going to stop him from helping Ody. He might need Penelope’s help though, the poor king misses his family and wife and Penelope would bring the wrath of the storms once she hears what happens.

Hermes is also depicted as the God of not only Messengers but Trickery, Deception, Persuasion, Thieves, and Troublemaker. Which Odysseus fits. Not in a cocky arrogant asshole way (if we’re only talking about EPIC…hopefully) but in a way of helping either others or himself occasionally.

Hermes could easily try to spread a rumor or, as you said, get other Gods involved.

But seeing how Zeus is shown in EPIC (and in general with those who act out on his own will) I feel like He knows all of Hermes tricks and would take the blame either on Hermes, or worse; Odysseus. Who’s already having enough trouble as it is with Calypso and his Depression.

Penelope would 100% help her husband who she hasn’t seen in 20 years if it meant those fuck up suitors left. I can see Hermes tell a few exaggerated lies hidden in buckets of truths so Penelope would be angry enough to even impress Ares.