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and it was never just getting bullied as a kid. it’s that deep seated feeling of wrongness. those girls at the lunch table snicker and giggle and laugh not with you but at you, and that soft and primal part of your brain screams, for you are a social animal and being rejected by the tribe means death. that is why it hurts so much. that is why when they laugh so quietly behind their hands and insist that they’re your friends, you can’t help but feel as if you are about to vomit. and it was never about being shoved into lockers or getting called mean names like those adults thought, it was the most subtle exclusions that hurt the most. it was the swollen wound in your heart, unfurled and on display, trying to stretch itself just enough to welcome people inside who never wanted to be there in the first place. it’ll have you wanting to tear the poor organ out, just to have the certainty. to know that the stretching and ripping is over. to be free of the limbo you’re stuck in.

and deep down, very deep down, you know this is not what friendship is. but you have never known anything different, and the adults tell you that it can’t be bullying if they’re smiling at you.

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The family's fighting again.

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i like him a normal amount. a very normal amount.

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onsen

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nature painting i did for finals

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beatiful isn't it

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this is my cat. she is mad at me because i will not let her go sit on my drawing tablet.

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overflow

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something something i got swept off of my feet by an ant

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was that the bite of ‘87???

cross stitch of markiplier and fnaf by me!!

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just so chat knows, if i don’t post for months it’s probably due to art block sooorry

im still alive i swear

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Look how far we’ve come

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Moving On

based on this blog by @trygrievousbutgirl-blog

this took way too long but i'm proud to have finished it. i hope you enjoy the artwork combination for the beautiful poem <3

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spork sprinkle

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ever heard of. 2007 portal odyssey. my favorite mobie

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madoka magica x 2001: a space odyssey