sinisteux-blog

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orlando bloom on the set of pirates of the caribbean: dead man’s chest in 2006

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tag urself 

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also ur telling me that elizabeth swann, king of the pirates, just sat at home the entire time while her son was in mortal danger trying to free his father and elizabeth’s husband from the curse?

i think not

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every man has a price he will willingly accept, even for that which he hopes never to sell.

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Elizabeth Swann is easily one of the very top few fictional characters I consider a role model alright.

And if you think about it, she was more of a pirate than Will Turner like the movies led us to believe.

She was resourceful as all hell. Almost the exact same to Jack, but with some differences. While jack had the ability to see things 10 steps ahead and make fully thought out plans and be able to just watch everything fall into place, Elizabeth had the ability to adapt and evolve with new obstacles. She could maneuver situations in ways that almost no other character could. She even outplayed Jack fucking Sparrow. On more than one occasion if I might add.

She was well educated. And not like with maths and sciences and philosophy and shit like that. I mean educated in the way that she understood exactly how others thought and how they were most likely to act, and played them accordingly. She had educated herself on the pirates code well before even thinking of setting foot on a pirate vessel, and knew it well enough to save her neck or someone else more than once.

Now on to the more “pirate-like” shit.

She didn’t originally know sword fighting, but in the first movie she goes to grab a decorative sword off the wall in her manor (which doesn’t work, for comedies sake, but moving on) with the intention of fighting the pirates ransacking her home. Not run, like literally everyone else in the manor, but actually fight. Two men versus one untrained woman I might add. What a queen. But during the second movie we learn that Will taught her the art of sword fighting. And she very clearly was an excellent student, for throughout the next two movies we see her go toe-to-toe with several badass and notorious pirates, and easily hold her own. And if she didn’t have access to a sword, she made do and made a weapon out of whatever was near her at the time.

When her wedding got crashed and she and Will arrested, Will was told to find Jack in order to gain them both freedom again, and so he set off to do so. Elizabeth on the other hand, with some assistance, was able to escape prison, and then proceeded to hold the man who arrested them at gunpoint until he gave her signed and sealed papers containing the pardon they needed.

She also later figured out that the Kracken was really after jack, and knowing he wouldn’t give himself up for the good of the others, she kissed him long enough as a distraction at the last minute to handcuff him to the mast, effectively becoming the only person to be able to kill Jack Sparrow.

She also knew the power of carefully made lies and crafted deception. She knew being a woman could get her certain places and certain perks, so she made it work in her favor. She knew the same but with being a man, so she figured out how to also make that work in her favor. She was mistake for a feared sea goddess, and instead of denying it, she rolled with it knowing it would be to her benefit. Which it did, considering it then aided in her achieving the status as captain of a pirate ship later on, and in effect earning her a place as a Pirate Lord. And then was voted in as the Pirate King.

She used every piece of knowledge and tools accessible to her as intelligently as she could. She crafted lies and deceptions to work to the advantage of herself and/or her companions. And she never apologized for these actions or for being anyone but herself.

Will thought and planned more in reference to his heart or sometimes rash feelings. Elizabeth was an analyzer and thought and planned through both logic and impeccable gut feeling.

Elizabeth Swann was one of the best pirates in this whole series, and no one can tell me any different.

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“In Sicily, women are more dangerous than shotguns.”

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explaining the plot of the godfather in one picture be like

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For real though imagine a gender flipped Godfather

Vittoria Corleone is the aging matriarch of a Sicilian crime family and must choose which of her daughters should take over the family business.

Womanizing, hot-headed Sunny is the oldest and heir apparent, but her temper and recklessness makes her a poor choice

Frieda is the useless middle child with who hides her low self esteem with hot rent boys

Missy, the youngest daughter, is the only child with the right temperament for leadership, but she wants nothing to do with the violence of the family business

The only boy, Constantino, is spoiled and frivolous and really really bad at picking husbands.

Holy shit I need this movie so bad.

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luca brasi held a gun to his head, and my father assured him that either his brains or his signature would be on the contract.