sirbradleyjames-blog

[sirbradleyjames-blog]

[sirbradleyjames-blog]

If I didn't make your dick hard, how the hell were you planning on fucking me? -sneers- Just a little boy with sensitive feelings.

You make things SO fucking hard. Everything- every fucking thing, EXCEPT my penis.

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I don't need this. -gets up-

-puts on poor southern accent- Bye shithead.

Do it.

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Are you fucking serious?

Do the southern accent. 

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It's almost impossible how you exist.

-sighs v. dramatically, so much drama today- Suck me off and I'll make your dreams come true BerryBoy.

How about we role play? Give me a second and let me think. -Lets go of Bradley and falls straight down on to the bed, thinking- Like those books you told me about- Thumb Sawyer and Huck ‘n Berry Finn, we can role play those boys. 

-thick southern accent- Paint my fence. 

[sirbradleyjames-blog]

This is actually pathetic. I think I might get married just to get laid on the regular and avoid this.

Yeah, yeah I would like that. And tell me how good I am and think of sexual names to call me during- like, honey boy, or the master of my cock. I’m not very good at coming up with those but you might be. 

[sirbradleyjames-blog]

-sips the last dregs of his drink before chucking it over the side of the bed-

What do you want from me? Want me to grind back on your cock and breathlessly pant on about how much I want you to fuck me into next week?

Oh don’t be like that, you’re gonna make young willy fall limp. 

You gotta be into it, curls. 

[sirbradleyjames-blog]

Such a caveman, the saddest caveman of all the cavemen, really. -stares at the shady group picture on the bedside table- Get on with it then.

-Reaches around and unbuckles his belt and pulls it through the loops-  Then you are about to be fucked by a smelly man. -yanks down TROUSERS AND PANTS- 

[sirbradleyjames-blog]

Unlike you, I even bathe. -condescending as fuck, it should be his middle name really. BradleyJames CondescendingAsFuck Harris-

Let me think, did you wipe your butt the last time you went to the bathroom?

[sirbradleyjames-blog]

That's big talk from someone like you, but can you follow through?

-Reaches down, grabs a hand full of hair and yanks it back- I will destroy your cavity. 

[sirbradleyjames-blog]

-sniffs indignantly- I don't think you can handle this ass.

-STANDS UP, PLACES FOOT ON BRADLEY’S BACK, PRESSES HIM DOWN TO LIE FLAT ON THE BED-

Give me your consent to enter your anus. 

[sirbradleyjames-blog]

Oh, is someone else coming? You should have told me.

No, turn around. Get on your hands and knees and let the real man get to work. 

[sirbradleyjames-blog]

I'm not looking for anything, I'm just here to shove things into your ass. But sure, for a price. -what if his hand was on fire, what. if.-

Just jerk it up. Don’t be cruel. Stare straight down my piss pipe and see if you can catch a glimpse of the inside of my ballsack. 

[sirbradleyjames-blog]

Shh, there's no need for screaming yet. I wasn't kidding though, you better prep yourself because I sure as hell can't be bothered. -takes a dramatically timed sip of starbuck$-

DON’T PLAY DRESS UP WITH ME PENIS

[sirbradleyjames-blog]

-falls to his knees rather dramatically-

Well, well, well

-lightly runs his fingers along the shaft before digging in his pocket && putting a cockring on it-

-laughs because idk, Bradley is just like that-

Okay, okay. 

-deep breath- 

-pulls out the python- 

[sirbradleyjames-blog]

Maybe.

Show me your dick.

-a light sweat breaks out on his forehead- We are gonna

fuck?

[sirbradleyjames-blog]

- politely toes off shoes before walking on the bed and placing a hand on Guac's unwashed hair.- I got you a gift, the sort you shouldn't write mothers about.

-reaches over and slams fist down on WIZARD radio and tina turner because seductively singing all her hit singles- Crawl into bed, white boy.