sivirika

[sivirika]

“I saw the world from the stars’ point of view, and it looked unbearably lonely.”

— Shaun David Hutchinson, We Are the Ants

[sivirika]

“Don’t look away. Look straight at everything. Look it all in the eye, good and bad.”

— Henry Miller

[sivirika]

Nikolay Tolmachev: Wounded II (2020)

[sivirika]

“I think we love who we love and there’s not a damn thing that can be done about it.”

— Susan Donovan, He Loves Lucy

[sivirika]

“To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.”

— Oscar Wilde

[sivirika]

Via Alexander Glass at Twitter.

[sivirika]

[sivirika]

In the last couple of days I have realised, beyond a shadow of a doubt, I am stronger and braver than I ever thought I was.

For that, I am grateful.

[sivirika]

Within the happening, the world is both beginning and ending.

[sivirika]

TEXT ME

[sivirika]

“There are things that need to be forgotten if you want to keep on living.”

— Jim Thompson

[sivirika]

a gift for a friend: mary (@thewinedarksea)

[sivirika]

Again. Love again. Trust again.

“The world continued to instruct: Do not love for they will disappear, do not trust for you will be betrayed, do not stand up for you will be swatted down. Still he heard those higher imperatives: Love and that love will be returned, trust in the righteous path and it will lead you to deliverance, fight and things will change.”

— Colson Whitehead, The Nickel Boys

[sivirika]

Streamlines

© riverwindphotography, August 2021

[sivirika]

"the curtains weren't blue on purpose. why should we care?"

my love! let me ask you this - did you eat breakfast today? this tiny moment in your life. just think about it. did you?

for some of you, the answer is yes and for some of you it is technically and for some of you it is does coffee count. some of you reached for cereal or gmo-free overnight oats or frozen waffles or 3-day-old pizza. sometimes we eat the same thing, every day, for weeks. i get tired of eggs randomly, only to go back to craving them desperately. i'm cuban; i take my coffee like my father showed me, very milky and sweet.

some of us ate in a hurry. some of us hate eating breakfast but if we don't we will get nauseous later. some of us took our meds first or took our meds after. some of us have a kitchen 5 feet wide and sometimes it's the biggest room in the house. some of us are confident there will be food in the pantry and some of us flinch and say well, the paycheck is coming. some of us turn on a podcast while we eat or we scroll our phones or write in our diaries.

some of us are choosing, specifically, not to eat breakfast. some of us are too busy. some of us are pretending we "just forgot," but we are ignoring the warning signs that everything feels too-heavy. some of us are so consumed with anxiety or grief that we can't eat. some of us can't stand up long enough to make our coffee. some of us have no table to sit down and eat.

i cannot tell you what an artist "meant" by their choices. but they did have to make a choice, conscious or otherwise, to give you information. to give you a little bit more light. each of these choices are little stars of data; connecting speckles for you to weave through, drawing a line.

you cannot use a mirror in a dark room. for some of us; we will not care that the curtains are blue, because that will just be a data point and not enough light to see by. for some of us, the blue curtains will be the same as our childhood bedroom. it will make us seasick. for some of us, blue will be the color of frostbite. it might look like a pixel up close; but from a distance, oh! the picture blooms.

i cannot tell you what will stick out for you. what will carry meaning. some of you will read the sentence "i didn't have breakfast today" and say "this means nothing." some of you will read that and say "oh, me neither." some of you will say "this means the character is probably a little grouchy." some of you will say "oh, i wonder if they're okay. why didn't they eat anything?" ... art is a mirror. i am holding hands with you, over space and time, and asking you to feel something with me.

i want you to read my work and find a blue pair of curtains. i want you to read my work and find things in it that i never imagined placing. i have no way of knowing what will resonate with you, that's true. and maybe i just was hungry while i wrote this, and thinking about the eggs in my fridge. but if you found meaning, that meaning is yours. it cannot be erased just because i didn't "intend" it. you created a different world by interpreting my work. it's collaborative! that's beautiful! that's stunning!

just! imagine looking at the night sky and saying - it's stupid to have a favorite constellation or a favorite star. they're just there.

because here's the thing - across centuries and cultures, we look up. we still find meaning in the stars. these beautiful, lovely scattered accidents. are you looking? they call. and we look back and say oh! of course we are!

[sivirika]

To whoever is reading this,

I hope in 2023 you open your heart and allow love, in whatever shape it present, to flow into you and make the space to continue to receive more. 💜 ♾ ✨

[sivirika]

“I would like to be known as an intelligent woman, a courageous woman, a loving woman, a woman who teaches by being.”

— Maya Angelou