soyforramen

[soyforramen]

my toxic trait is that i genuinely believe that the side effects of immortality won't affect me. i have so much stuff i want to learn i won't even notice the centuries go by. also i'm nosey as hell so the decades-deep gossip would keep myself from isolating from human society because i want to know what's going on. i would make such a good vampire i stand by this

[soyforramen]

Watching Ju-On after the pandemic is wild. The whole time I’m just thinking it’s an allegory for communicable diseases.

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Love that the underlying moral of Paranormal Activity is listen and believe your girlfriend.

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I arrive at the yarn store and grab a skein off the shelf, the exact same brand, type, weight and color of the one I bought a week ago. Everyone in the store immediately knows that I miscalculated the amount of yarn I'd need for a project. They start booing at me. They are throwing crocheted tomatoes at me. The old lady giving knitting lessons in the corner is shaking her head. She had such high hopes for me. The cashier spits at me when I pay for it.

[soyforramen]

i love laura palmer

[soyforramen]

Which one of y’all used Junebug Jones on an art exhibit???

[soyforramen]

You suddenly switch bodies with your icon. On a scale of 1 to 10, (10 being the highest value) how well are you coping with that change?

[soyforramen]

When people graffiti on buildings: Yes! Ha ha! Fuck yes!

When people graffiti on rockfaces and cliffsides on hiking trails: What the absolute fuck.

[soyforramen]

Ok, not to be that guy, but LWJ is pretty Cold Duke of the North coded. Hot? Check. Unapproachable? Check. Absolutely soft for the MC? Boyo checked all the boxes he could find and then made some more.

Anyways, LWJ would totally pull the, “Hmm, interesting,” if MDZS was an isekai.

[soyforramen]

FYP, Henrique Hermes

[soyforramen]

Can’t help but wonder whether the use of the name Comstock in Bioshock was inspired by the Comstock Act.

[soyforramen]

Still can’t get over Marvel saying Yes to naming a black character Jefferson Davis … and yet they missed calling his son Miles Davis (Morales).

[soyforramen]

“Are you the witch who turned eleven princes into swans?”

The old woman stared at the figure on the front step of her cottage and considered her options. It was the kind of question usually backed up by a mob with meaningful torches, and it was the kind of question she tried to avoid.

Coming from a single dusty, tired housewife, it should’ve held no terrors.

“You a cop?”

The housewife twisted the hem of her apron. “No,” she muttered. “I’m a swan.”

A raven croaked somewhere in the woods. Wind whispered in the autumn leaves.

Then: “I think I can guess,” the old woman said slowly. “Husband stole your swan skin and forced you to marry him?”

A nod.

“And you can’t turn back into a swan until you find your skin again.”

A nod.

“But I reckon he’s hidden it, or burned it, or keeps it locked up so you can’t touch it.”

A tiny, miserable nod.

“And then you hear that old Granny Rothbart who lives out in the woods is really a batty old witch whose father taught her how to turn princes into swans,” the old woman sighed. “And you think, ‘Hey, stuff the old skin, I can just turn into a swan again this way.’

“But even if that was true – which I haven’t said if it is or if it isn’t – I’d say that I can only do it to make people miserable. I’m an awful person. I can’t do it out of the goodness of my heart. I have no goodness. I can’t use magic to make you feel better. I only wish I could.”

Another pause. “If I was a witch,” she added.

The housewife chewed the inside of her cheek. Then she drew herself up and, for the first time, looked the old woman in the eyes.

“Can you do it to make my husband miserable?”

The old woman considered her options. Then she pulled the wand out from the umbrella stand by the door. It was long, and silver, and a tiny glass swan with open wings stood perched on the tip.

“I can work with that,” said the witch.

[soyforramen]

[soyforramen]

having an experience

[soyforramen]

[soyforramen]

Why are you lgbtq+? wrong answers only GO